Tuesday, September 15 | 6:30 PM CST | Online

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Every platform we touch was built by people whose job it is to capture our attention and relieve us of the agency to disconnect. For all brains this isn’t a fair fight. For ADHD brains this can mean instant surrender. The hyper-sensitive ADHD brain operates in a world that is hostile to its good functioning. Social media and games create easy engagement and quick rewards, reducing the drive to pursue a fully embodied life.

This talk lays out what your child’s nervous system is missing when they choose screens and how to create the necessary safeguards specific to your family. Not all screen time is the enemy, but all screen time presents risk. It’s never too late to start correcting course, wherever your family is right now.

You’ll leave with a clear picture of the problem, the physiology behind it, and a practical family framework, including a one-page tool, for restoring real engagement to your child’s life and your home

RSVP

We’re excited to welcome Bronwyn Foley back to ADHDKC! Many parents joined us for her excellent June 2025 presentation on fears, bedtime resistance, and nightmares in children with ADHD.

📅 Sunday, September 13, 2026

🕑 2:00–4:00 PM

📍 Conference Room 3, Lenexa City Center Library 8778 Penrose Ln, Lenexa, KS 66219

Save a seat

Understanding ADHD, Explaining It to Others & Recognizing the Whole Picture

How do you explain ADHD to someone who doesn’t have it? In this support group, we’ll talk about how to communicate what ADHD actually looks like—including the challenges, strengths, and experiences that are often misunderstood.

We’ll explore ADHD strengths and differences, how ADHD can affect things like empathy, emotional regulation, communication, and relationships, and how to explain your needs without feeling like you have to constantly defend yourself.

We’ll also tackle an important distinction: ADHD can explain a behavior, but it doesn’t excuse hurtful behavior. Understanding the difference between explanation, accountability, and self-compassion can help us navigate relationships while still taking responsibility for our actions.

Finally, we’ll discuss the high rates of co-occurring conditions with ADHD and why looking at the whole person—not just ADHD symptoms—matters.

Seats are limited - save your seat today!

RSVP

Who Should Attend?

This group is designed for adults with ADHD, those who suspect they may have ADHD, and adults who want to better understand how sensory processing influences everyday life.

No prior knowledge is needed—just come ready to learn, share, and connect with others who understand the unique challenges of living with ADHD.

About the ADHDKC Adults’ Group

We meet monthly to build community and support adults navigating ADHD in everyday life. Each meeting includes:

• A featured topic introduced by Nic & Abbie

• Time for discussion, questions, and shared strategies

• Space for members to suggest future topics based on what matters most to them

Whether you’re newly diagnosed or have years of lived experience, this group offers a space to connect, learn, and grow together.

💻 Event Details

📅 Tuesday, September 1st

⏰ 5:30 PM CST | TIME ZONE CONVERTER

💻 Online via Zoom

💸 FREE for all Middle and High School Students (and their parents)

🔗 RSVP with the button to get a Zoom link

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Can’t fall asleep? Can’t stay asleep? Can’t wake up?

You’re definitely not the only one.

Sleep and ADHD have a complicated relationship. Your brain finally feels awake when everyone else is getting ready for bed. One more video turns into an hour. Your thoughts won’t slow down. Then the alarm goes off way too soon — and the whole cycle starts again.

The frustrating part? Poor sleep doesn’t just make you tired. It can make ADHD symptoms even harder to manage, affecting focus, memory, emotions, motivation, and even school performance.

Join ADHDKCTeen for an interactive discussion designed specifically for middle and high school students with ADHD. We’ll talk about the science behind why ADHD brains struggle with sleep — and, more importantly, what actually helps.

What We’ll Explore

In this interactive online session you’ll learn:

• Why ADHD and sleep problems are so closely connected

• How screens, routines, exercise, and stress affect your brain at bedtime

• Small changes that can make a surprisingly big difference

• Why morning sunlight and evening darkness help reset your body clock

• How room temperature, movement, and mindfulness can improve sleep quality

• When sleep problems might need more than good habits

We’ll also discuss some treatments that healthcare professionals may recommend, including Cognitive Behavioral Therapy for Insomnia (CBT-I), when it makes sense to check for issues like low iron stores, and what the research says about supplements such as melatonin, magnesium, and others that may support healthy sleep. We’ll separate the evidence from the hype so you know what’s actually worth discussing with your family and healthcare provider.

Why This Matters

Getting better sleep isn’t just about feeling less tired. We know sleep is hard for teens. And those with ADHD. Teens with ADHD… REALLY HARD.

The good news? You don’t have to become a “perfect sleeper” overnight. Even a few simple changes can help your ADHD brain work better.

Come with your questions, your struggles, and your best sleep hacks—we’ll learn from each other and leave with practical strategies you can start using right away.

Sleep isn’t wasted time—it’s one of the most powerful tools for helping your ADHD brain thrive.

Who should attend ADHDKCTeen events?

Middle and high school students with or executive functioning challenges, emotional dysregulation, frustration with social circles, and more can join each month to learn about the topics important to them.

No diagnosis of ADHD is required - many people without a diagnosis struggle with these issues and can come to learn.

Event Format

This is a highly interactive online Zoom session designed for ADHD brains. With a smaller group format (typically 5–10 participants join), teens have space to participate comfortably while learning alongside others who “get it.”

We had so many fantastic ideas for future topics at our August meetup that instead of choosing just one… we’re doing all of them. Here’s our lineup for the next several months — one topic each month. We’ll group together the self-care topics first, so after September’s sleep tips, we’ll talk about exercise and nutrition to help our brains, then move on to some neuroscience and emotional regulation topics and impulse control.

🏃 October — “Exercise That Actually Helps Our Brain”

Following sleep, we’ll continue the self-care theme by covering exercise. Not “go run laps,” but the kinds of movement that boost focus, mood, and motivation.

🥗 November — “Eating For Brain Benefits”

Talking about what we can eat to optimize our brain health naturally follows sleep and exercise. ADHD significantly impacts eating behaviors - from forgetting to eat or not feeling hungry to impulsive eating, we can hit big swings in blood sugar levels and struggle to get the nutrients we need for our body and brain. Let’s see what we can do about it.

🦁 December — “Animals & the Brain”

This is my favorite intro-to-neuroscience talks. We’ll learn how our brains work by relating different parts to different animals. I’ve added an animal since the last time I did the talk, so even if you’ve heard of the animals before, you’ll get to meet Thumper the rabbit.

🐜 December — “ANTs: Automatic Negative Thoughts”

We’ll learn what ANTs are, why they show up so fast, and how to challenge them before they take over your mind.

🔥 January — “When Emotions Go From 0 to 100”

We’ve all been there - our mood flips a switch and we lose control. In January we’ll talk about emotional regulation, what’s happening in the brain during big feelings, and tools to help you get back to baseline.

🚀 February — “Impulse Control”

Let’s talk about how ADHD affects impulse control in teens and what you can do about it. This isn’t about stopping behavior. It’s about replacing it with something that works better. Because ADHD doesn’t mean no control — it means learning the right tools for your brain.

🧱 March — “Why Can’t I Stop”

After February’s talk on impulse control basics, let’s go deeper. If you struggle to stop doing something you love… or avoid what you know you should do, join us in March.

Presented by Pediatric Experts

Kristen Stuppy, MD and Jennifer Dilts, DO - Pediatricians dedicated to helping teens understand ADHD and build practical, real-world skills.

Dr. Kristen Stuppy is a pediatrician in Overland Park with more than 25 years of experience caring for kids and navigating neurodiversity, both in clinic and at home. She’s passionate about helping children and parents understand ADHD and learn practical ways to manage symptoms. While she prescribes medication when appropriate, she also recognizes that many families face real barriers to therapy or coaching. By leading ADHDKC’s monthly teen events, she creates an accessible, welcoming space where middle and high schoolers can build skills, gain confidence, and feel supported as they grow.

Dr. Jennifer Dilts is a pediatrician with a love for blending science, curiosity, and whole-child care. After earning her biology degree from Wake Forest University, she completed her D.O. and MHA at A.T. Still University and her pediatric residency at Riley Hospital for Children. She spent over a decade in general pediatrics before expanding her expertise into headache medicine and medical acupuncture, earning board certifications in both. Dr. Dilts has also completed advanced training in ADHD, anxiety, depression, pediatric hypnosis, and medical education. Along the way, she has served as a principal investigator in multiple clinical headache trials. Her work reflects a commitment to thoughtful, integrative care that helps kids feel better, function better, and thrive.

Our next ADHDKC Book Club selection is ADHD Is Awesome: A Guide to (Mostly) Thriving with ADHD by Penn and Kim Holderness—and our first discussion question will be posted tomorrow!

That means now is the perfect time to grab your copy and start reading. But don’t worry if you haven’t finished the assigned chapters—or even if you’re a little behind. The book club is meant to be a conversation, not a homework assignment. Jump in whenever you can!

💬 How the Book Club Works

We want to help all of us ADHDers stay on track while reading, so you won’t have to read the whole thing all at once. We will have weekly topics to help pace you before our live wrap-up meeting.

1. Join the conversation in the ADHDKC Group Forum.
Our first discussion question will be posted tomorrow, and we’ll continue adding questions and conversation prompts as we work through the book. Find our reading schedule below.

The group forum works a lot like your favorite social media sites—you can post, comment, react, and join conversations—but it’s safely housed right on the ADHDKC website. You don’t have to wait for the live meeting to talk about what you’re reading! See what others are thinking, share your thoughts, and help stay on track to finish the book.

Or not. We know life gets busy, and you’re still welcome to visit the weekly forum post comments to see how the book is going and offer thoughts the discussion stimulates. Whether you’ve read the chapter or not, you still might have opinions from life experiences.

Join the Book Club Group Forum

👉 Anyone can join the group and participate in the discussion.

2. Sign up for the wrap-up session.
RSVP for our online wrap-up discussion on Thursday, November 12 at 7:00 PM CST.

RSVP for the Wrap-up Session

3. Come to the November 12 online wrap-up.
After we’ve had time to read and discuss together, we’ll gather online for a live conversation about the book. RSVP through the event page to get the Zoom information.

🧠 Reading Schedule

One of the best things about this format is that you can participate even if you’re not caught up. Just try to stick to the reading schedule when you can and join the conversation as you go.

Below is the week‑by‑week reading plan for ADHD Is Awesome. You’re welcome to follow along at your own pace or jump into the forum discussions whenever you can.

• Week 1 — Mon, Aug 17 Ch. 1–2 — ADHD 101 / The Big D: Diagnosing ADHD

• Week 2 — Mon, Aug 24 Ch. 3–4 — Inside the ADHD Brain / The ADHD Experience

• Week 3 — Mon, Aug 31 Ch. 5 — The Emotional Side of ADHD

• Week 4 — Mon, Sep 7 Ch. 6–7 — You’re Going to Be Okay / Facing Your ADHD

• Week 5 — Mon, Sep 14 Ch. 8 — Operation Mindset Shift

• Week 6 — Mon, Sep 21 Ch. 9–10 — The ADHD Upsides for You / for Others

• Week 7 — Mon, Sep 28 Ch. 11 — The Right Stuff

• Week 8 — Mon, Oct 5 Ch. 12 — Charge Your Battery

• Week 9 — Mon, Oct 12 Ch. 13 — Master Your Daily Routine

• Week 10 — Mon, Oct 19 Ch. 14–15 — Control Your Environment / Get It Done

• Week 11 — Mon, Oct 26 Ch. 16 — How to Be an ADHD Whisperer (Like Kim!)

• Week 12 — Mon, Nov 2 Ch. 17–18 — Parents and Caretakers Make the Difference / Taking Care of Caretakers

• Week 13 — Mon, Nov 9 Ch. 19 — Listening: The Best Hard Habit

So, get your book, check out the reading schedule, and watch the group forum tomorrow for our first question!

Read together. Think together. Laugh together.

And maybe discover a few new ways to think about ADHD along the way.

The next book will be chosen at the wrap-up session based on suggestions made when signing up for the Book Club Group and the discussion on Zoom. Think about what else you want to read and suggest it to the group.

Missed this week’s ADHDKC Parent Group talk with Sarah Kesty? Good news—you can still catch it!

Sarah shared practical, encouraging strategies for understanding executive function and supporting teens without turning executive-function struggles into a judgment about effort, motivation, or character.

Rather than giving you all the answers here, we’ll just say: this is one you’ll want to watch. Sarah brings a “detective perspective” to executive function—helping parents get curious about why something is happening and what might make things work better for their child. She also shared some wonderfully practical ideas for making strategies more brain-friendly and helping teens develop their own systems.

Sarah introduces her CSR framework for strengthening executive functioning skills:

• Capture – Write things down. Your brain isn’t built to remember everything.

• Schedule – Block time weekly to organize your notes and tasks.

• Remind – Use tools (digital or analog) to prompt future-you to take action.

She mentioned in the talk that she’d share an article about the CSR method. Learn how to get students to use their planners with the button below.

CSR in Edutopia

By learning to respect how your brain works and setting up supports that align with it, you can build more trust in yourself—and follow through on the things that matter most.

Sarah reminded us that executive-function skills can grow—and that finding the right strategy is often an experiment rather than a one-size-fits-all solution.

One more reason to listen to Sarah’s talk: her message is ultimately hopeful. Executive function isn’t a character trait you either have or don’t have. They’re skills—and skills can grow.

🎥 Watch the recording

Watch the recording above to see the slides with the talk.

🎧 Prefer to listen?

The talk is also available through ADHDKC Conversations, our podcast, so you can listen while driving, walking, or doing all those other things that don’t require quite so much executive function!

Find ADHDKC Conversations on your favorite podcast player.

More from Sarah Kesty

Sarah also shared several opportunities for parents and educators who want to learn more about executive function.

TEFOS is this weekend!
The Executive Function Online Summit, hosted by Seth Perler, is one of Sarah’s favorite executive-function events each year. This year includes topic tracks such as emotional regulation and self-advocacy, making it easier to focus on the topics most relevant to you.

Learn More About TEFOS

Sarah mentioned that she’s hosting a free online book club for Growing Executive Function TODAY August 13 at 8 PM ET / 7 PM CT. Parents and educators are welcome!

Register for the Book Club

If you’re a teacher looking for back-to-school resources or want to share information with your child’s teacher, Sarah’s classroom design article was recently featured in Edutopia’s Back-to-School Starter Pack.

Edutopia's Back to School Starter Pack

🎙️ The Executive Function Podcast

Sarah’s podcast, The Executive Function Podcast, is also focusing on back-to-school topics this week and next, featuring authors, speakers, and teachers sharing practical insight and hope for students.

You can listen on Spotify or Apple (or many other platforms).

Find all the upcoming ADHDKC Events on our website to keep learning with us.

ADHDKC Event Page

Quick Facts

Sunday, August 23

• 2:30–3:30 PM: Facilitated discussion and educational content

• 3:30–4:30 PM: Optional connection and networking time

Central Resource Library – Conference Room 20

RSVP

You know the task needs to be done. You may even want to do it. Yet somehow you’re reorganizing a drawer, scrolling your phone, researching a completely unrelated topic, or convincing yourself you’ll “feel more motivated later.”

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.

Procrastination is one of the most common struggles for adults with ADHD, but it isn’t simply laziness or poor motivation. Different types of procrastination are driven by different underlying challenges—including overwhelm, perfectionism, boredom, emotional avoidance, time blindness, and difficulty getting started.

In this interactive Women’s Group, we’ll explore why procrastination happens, identify common procrastination styles, and share practical strategies that can help make tasks more approachable.

During this session, we’ll discuss:

• Why procrastination is so common with ADHD

• Different procrastination styles and patterns

• The role of emotions, perfectionism, and overwhelm

• How task initiation differs from motivation

• Small strategies that can help reduce avoidance

• Real-life examples of what has worked for group members

  SIGN UP TODAY

New Women’s Group Format

We’re excited to pilot a new format for our Women’s Group!

• 2:30–3:30 PM: Facilitated discussion and educational content

• 3:30–4:30 PM: Optional connection and networking time

After our discussion, participants are invited to stay and connect with other women navigating similar challenges. Share experiences, exchange ideas, and build community in a relaxed, supportive environment.

Important Information

This event is free and open to the public.

This group is intended for adult women with ADHD or ADHD traits, whether formally diagnosed, self-identified, or still exploring the possibility that ADHD may be part of their story.

No registration fee. All are welcome.

ADHDKC is a nonprofit organization run by volunteers and dedicated to fostering education, support, and connection.

This session is intended for educational and peer support purposes only and does not provide medical, psychological, legal, or mental health treatment or advice.

• Participation in discussion is always optional

• Listening is welcome

• Personal experiences and practical strategies are encouraged

• This group does not replace individualized professional care

The meeting is facilitated to help ensure a safe, supportive, and respectful environment for all attendees.

While we hope participants leave feeling empowered, informed, and connected, this event is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, legal consultation, or medical treatment.

This month our Parent Group, Youth Group, and Women’s Group all are covering executive functioning topics, and we’ve heard from a few families who weren’t sure which event they should RSVP for - or which they should sign up for, so we wanted to send a quick guide. While we’re at it, we don’t want to leave our other fabulous events out, so here’s a summary of all our August events. We start the month strong with two events this week, so don’t put off signing up.

If you struggle navigating our website, there are some tips at the bottom of this newsletter that show you how to see all the events you’ve RSVP’d to attend and how to sign up for our online forums, where you can continue the conversation in a safe space between events.

One little tip - each of our groups except the book club has a group logo to help identify who is sponsoring the event and if you fit the audience.

We hope you can join us this month for one or more of these fabulous events!

How do I get myself to start homework and other stuff done when I don’t want to?

August 4, 2026, 5:30 – 6:30 PM CDT

Empower your teen with immediate strategies to get organized and finish tasks without the usual struggle. While we’re focusing on homework due to the back-to-school time of year, tools discussed will help kids motivate to do all the tasks they don’t feel like doing.

This interactive online workshop is designed for tweens and teens with ADHD. Rather than another lecture about “being more responsible,” we’ll focus on practical strategies they can start using right away to get organized, manage school demands, and get things done. It’s led by pediatrician Kristen Stuppy.

Parents are welcome to attend alongside their teen, but the activities and discussion are geared toward students. The ADHDKCTeen events are not recorded due to the interactive nature for the privacy of our participants.

Participants are encouraged to join our Teen Group on ADHDKC’s Group Page. We’ll share worksheets and activities there so students can continue practicing the skills they learned, reflect on what works for them, and ask questions. While it’s generally a quiet online community, it’s a safe place to find encouragement and support from others with similar experiences. It is moderated by several of our board members.

RSVP for the youth event

Thursday, August 6th at 7:00 PM (Online)

Have you been reading ADHD 2.0 with us? Or maybe you’ve been following along in the discussion forum... or maybe life got busy (we get it—that’s kind of why we’re here! 😊).

No matter where you are in the book, you’re invited to join our live online discussion this Thursday at 7:00 PM.

You do NOT have to finish the book to participate. In fact, even if you haven’t started reading, you’re welcome to join the conversation. Hearing others’ perspectives can be just as valuable, and your questions or experiences may help someone else.

One of the best parts of our Book Club is learning from each other. The more voices we have, the richer the discussion becomes.

Join the conversation

Sunday, August 9 | 2:00–4:00 PM

Conference Room 3, Lenexa City Center Library 8778 Penrose Ln, Lenexa, KS 66219

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by bright lights, certain sounds, clothing textures, strong smells, or a crowded room?

Do you find yourself constantly seeking movement, fidgeting, or needing quiet time after a busy day?

Many adults with ADHD experience sensory differences that can affect emotions, focus, relationships, work, and daily life. Sensory overload can lead to frustration, irritability, anxiety, or feeling completely drained.

Understanding your sensory profile can help you better recognize your needs and find strategies that work for you.

This small group discussion is not recorded and space is limited, so save your seat today.

Save a spot for the Adult's Group

Executive Function Strategies for Teens

August 11, 2026, 6:30 – 7:30 PM CDT

This session is designed for parents, caregivers, and educators. It will be presented in a typical lecture style, with time for questions and answers.

Executive Function Coach Sarah Kesty will share brain-friendly approaches to help teens develop the executive function skills they need to succeed at home, at school, and beyond.

Parents are encouraged to join our Parent Group, where conversations continue after the event. It’s a private discussion community focused on parenting children with ADHD and other neurodiversities, where you can ask questions, share experiences, and learn from other families.

This will be recorded with speaker permission and shared through our newsletter and posted to our past recordings page.

RSVP for the Parent Group Event

Podcasts and Video Recordings

Our Parent Group produces two podcasts most months — a short episode and a long episode. All of the recordings are also shared on YouTube with video.

The short episodes introduce our upcoming speaker, giving you a quick way to get to know them and preview the topic they’ll cover at our next event.

The long episodes feature full recordings of our parent group sessions whenever we get speaker permission to record their talk, so those with conflicts to join us can watch or listen afterward.

See Past Recordings

Location: Central Resource Library Logan Conference Room, 9875 W 87 th St, Overland Park, KS 66212
Date: August 23, 2026, 2:30 – 4:30 PM

Our Women’s Group is talking about procrastination this month. Space is limited to help foster small group conversations.

If you constantly find yourself convincing yourself you’ll feel more motivated later, this event is designed for you. Join us to dive deep into the habits that hold you back.

This is a small group discussion and is not recorded. Spots are limited - save your seat today.

Save my seat

Not sure if you’re registered already registered?

You can view all upcoming events on our event page

Event Page

If you’re logged into your ADHDKC account, you can also:

1. Click your profile icon in the upper-right corner.

2. Open your member area/profile.

3. Look for My Events (or your registered events) to see the events you’ve signed up for.

If you accidentally registered for the wrong event — or if you’d like to attend both (many families do!) — you can register for the other event from the event calendar or simply reply to this email and we’ll be happy to help.

We hope you’ll join the event that best fits your needs, and we look forward to seeing both teens and parents throughout August!

Why use the ADHDKC Groups?

Did you know we host online discussion groups directly on the ADHDKC website?

Unlike social media, they’re private communities where your information stays within ADHDKC. There are no distracting algorithms or endless feeds competing for your attention — just resources, discussions, and support related to ADHD.

You can find all our online groups on our Group Page

Group Page

ADHDKC August Adult Support Group

📅 Sunday, August 9

🕑 2:00–4:00 PM

📍 Conference Room 3, Lenexa City Center Library 8778 Penrose Ln, Lenexa, KS 66219

Save My Seat

Don’t miss updates about our Book Club below the Adult Group Event information! Our wrap-up session is coming soon.

Have you ever felt overwhelmed by bright lights, certain sounds, clothing textures, strong smells, or a crowded room? Do you find yourself constantly seeking movement, fidgeting, or needing quiet time after a busy day?

Many adults with ADHD experience sensory differences that can affect emotions, focus, relationships, work, and daily life. Sensory overload can lead to frustration, irritability, anxiety, or feeling completely drained.

Understanding your sensory profile can help you better recognize your needs and find strategies that work for you.

What We’ll Discuss

This month’s ADHDKC Adult Support Group will explore the many ways sensory processing affects adults with ADHD.

Together we’ll discuss:

• External senses such as sound, light, touch, smell, taste, and vision

• Internal senses that help us recognize hunger, thirst, body awareness, movement, and emotional cues

• Why people with ADHD may experience both sensory seeking and sensory avoidance

• How sensory overload can impact mood, attention, and emotional regulation

• Practical tools and strategies to reduce overstimulation and better meet your sensory needs

Whether you’ve always known you were sensitive to your environment or are just beginning to understand how sensory experiences affect you, you’ll leave with new insights and practical ideas to try.

RSVP

Who Should Attend?

This group is designed for adults with ADHD, those who suspect they may have ADHD, and adults who want to better understand how sensory processing influences everyday life.

No prior knowledge is needed—just come ready to learn, share, and connect with others who understand the unique challenges of living with ADHD.

About the ADHDKC Adults’ Group

We meet monthly to build community and support adults navigating ADHD in everyday life. Each meeting includes:

• A featured topic introduced by Nic & Abbie

• Time for discussion, questions, and shared strategies

• Space for members to suggest future topics based on what matters most to them

Whether you’re newly diagnosed or have years of lived experience, this group offers a space to connect, learn, and grow together.

Join the Conversation

ADHDKC Adult Support Groups provide a welcoming, supportive environment where adults can learn evidence-based information, exchange practical strategies, and connect with others who truly “get it.”

We hope you’ll join us for an engaging discussion and leave with a better understanding of your sensory experiences—and tools to help you navigate them with greater confidence.

📚 ADHDKC Book Club: Join the Conversation!

We’re currently reading ADHD 2.0 by Dr. Edward Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey together as part of the new ADHDKC Book Club, and we’d love for you to join us!

Each week, we’ve been posting discussion questions in our online community to help us explore the book’s ideas, share experiences, and learn from one another. You can follow along at your own pace and participate whenever it works for you. ADHDKC’s online forums are designed to keep learning and connection going between events, whether you attend meetings, engage online, or both.

Our live session is coming soon and even if you haven’t been following along with the weekly forum discussion, you’re welcome to join us for our Zoom wrap-up session, happening on Thursday, August 6 at 7:00 PM.

👉 Join the forum discussion at ADHDKC Online Groups & Forums

👉 RSVP for the Wrap-up Zoom Discussion

Haven’t started the book?

Didn’t finish a chapter?

Not planning to read it at all?

You’re still welcome.

Some of the best learning happens when people share their questions, experiences, and perspectives. The more people who participate, the more we all learn. So jump into the discussion, react to a post, ask a question, or share something that resonated with you. Every contribution adds value.

Whether you’re reading every page, listening to the audiobook, skimming a chapter, or simply curious about ADHD, we’d love to have you as part of the conversation.

Executive Function Strategies for Teens: ADHDKC Parent Group

📅 Tuesday, August 11

⏰ 6:30 PM CST

💻 Online Event (Live + Interactive)

🎟️ Cost: Free for Parents, Educators & Adults wanting to learn to how to better support teens

RSVP

Feeling like your teen is overwhelmed, scattered, or constantly playing catch-up?

Teen life today demands strong executive function skills—but many teens (especially those with ADHD or other learning differences) are still developing these critical abilities.

Managing schoolwork, keeping track of a busy schedule, and navigating social expectations can quickly become overwhelming—for both teens and their parents.

You’re not alone—and there are ways to help.

Join us for a practical, validating, and strategy-packed session

Executive Function Coach, Sarah Kesty, will guide parents through brain-friendly ways to support teens in building the skills they need to thrive—at home, at school, and beyond.

This isn’t about “trying harder.”

It’s about working smarter with how the brain actually functions.

🎁 Bonus for attendees:

Sarah will be sharing a free giveaway resource to help you start implementing what you learn right away!

In this session, you’ll learn:

✔️ What executive function skills really are (and why teens struggle with them)

✔️ Practical, realistic tools to help with:

• Organization

• Time management

• Task initiation

• Follow-through

• And more

✔️ How to reduce daily conflict and support independence

✔️ Ways to meet your teen where they are—without burnout (for either of you)

You’ll walk away with:

✨ Concrete strategies you can try right away

✨ A better understanding of your teen’s challenges

✨ Validation that you’re not alone in this

✨ Tools to support growth

Who Should Attend?

• Parents and caregivers of teens with ADHD

• Families navigating executive function challenges

• Anyone supporting a teen who struggles with organization, motivation, or follow-through

  I want to come

About the Speaker

Sarah Kesty is an executive function, ADHD, and autism coach, educator, author, and speaker dedicated to helping neurodivergent individuals thrive. She is the founder of Brain Tools School and host of the Executive Function Podcast.

A 4-time Teacher of the Year, Sarah brings nearly two decades of experience supporting students and families in building real-life executive function skills that make daily life smoother and more manageable.

She specializes in translating research into practical, actionable strategies that families and educators can use right away. Her work has been featured in publications such as Psychology Today, Edutopia, and state and national education organizations.

Sarah’s engaging, down-to-earth style focuses on creating brain-friendly systems, inclusive environments, and sustainable strategies that empower teens and young adults to build independence and confidence.

Reminders

🔔 This session is presented by an ADHD expert and advocate and is intended to provide general information, guidance, and support around ADHD-related topics. While we’ll cover helpful strategies and leave time for questions and discussion, please keep in mind that this presentation is not a substitute for personalized medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

🔔 All participants must agree to CHADD’s Participation Agreement:

CHADD Participation Agreement

If you have specific concerns about your own situation or that of a loved one, we encourage you to follow up with your healthcare provider or a qualified mental health professional. We also ask that everyone respect the privacy of others and help us maintain a supportive, inclusive space for open dialogue.

Save Your Spot

Join us for an informative, supportive evening designed to help you better understand—and support—the anxious brain.

Save My Spot

Tweens and teens with ADHD don’t need another lecture about “being more responsible.”

They need strategies they can use right away to get organized and get stuff done.

💻 Tween/Teen Event Details

📅 Tuesday, August 4th

⏰ 5:30 PM CST

💻 Online via Zoom

💸 FREE for all Middle and High School Students (10 - 18 years and their parents)

🔗 RSVP with the link below to get your Zoom link rsvp

RSVP

For the women in the room who wish they could learn about tackling procrastination, our Women’s Group is planning on talking about this in October. See our Events Page to learn more about this and all the other upcoming ADHDKC events.

Homework doesn’t have to take over your life.

Does this sound familiar?

• You know you need to start homework... but you just can’t get yourself to begin.

• You get distracted every few minutes.

• You forget assignments until the last minute.

• You spend more time avoiding homework than actually doing it.

• You promise yourself, “This year will be different,” but by October you’re already behind.

If so, you’re not alone — and you’re definitely not lazy.

Maybe you don’t have homework yet, but you can’t get motivated to do other necessary tasks. You can use the tools from this talk to do all the things you put off.

Students with ADHD often struggle with the executive functioning skills that homework requires, like planning, getting started, staying focused, and remembering what needs to be done. The good news? These are skills you can strengthen with the right strategies.

Join ADHDKC for an interactive online workshop designed just for middle and high school students. We’ll skip the boring lecture and focus on practical tips you can actually use when school starts—and throughout the year.

RSVP

During this workshop, you’ll learn how to:

• Get started even when you don’t feel motivated

• Beat procrastination and avoid last-minute panic

• Stay focused without relying on willpower alone

• Create homework routines that actually stick

• Find study strategies that work with your ADHD brain—not against it

• Build habits that make school less stressful

This isn’t just a presentation. You’ll have opportunities to participate using emoji reactions and the chat, answer fun polls, share ideas, and ask questions in a supportive, judgment-free environment. Whether you love to jump into the discussion or prefer to participate quietly, there’s a place for you.

You’ll leave with your own personalized homework game plan and several new tools to try right away.

After our July ADHDKC Teen session, Kristen received this email from a mom. She graciously gave permission to share it because she hopes other families will know they’re not alone.

There is no better compliment than hearing a teen say they wish the next meeting could be tomorrow. 💙

Creating a place where teens with ADHD feel understood, connected, and excited to come back is exactly why we started these groups. They learn practical strategies, but just as importantly, they discover they’re surrounded by other teens who “get it.”

To this family—thank you for trusting us and for allowing me to share your words. Messages like this remind our volunteers and presenters why this work matters.

If you have a middle or high school student with ADHD who could benefit from meeting other teens facing similar challenges, we’d love to have them join us at a future ADHDKC Teen event.

Reserve Your Spot Today!

The school year is a lot easier when you have a plan before homework starts piling up. Join other teens who understand the struggle, learn practical strategies that work, and start the year with confidence.

RSVP today—we’d love to see you there!

RSVP

Event Format

This is a highly interactive online Zoom session designed for ADHD brains. With a smaller group format (typically 5–10 participants join), teens have space to participate comfortably while learning alongside others who “get it.”

Presented by Pediatric Experts

Kristen Stuppy, MD and Jennifer Dilts, DO - Pediatricians dedicated to helping teens understand ADHD and build practical, real-world skills.

Dr. Kristen Stuppy is a pediatrician in Overland Park with more than 25 years of experience caring for kids and navigating neurodiversity, both in clinic and at home. She’s passionate about helping children and parents understand ADHD and learn practical ways to manage symptoms. While she prescribes medication when appropriate, she also recognizes that many families face real barriers to therapy or coaching. By leading ADHDKC’s monthly teen events, she creates an accessible, welcoming space where middle and high schoolers can build skills, gain confidence, and feel supported as they grow. Check out Dr. Stuppy’s Substack to learn more with her.

Dr Stuppy's "Quest for Health KC"

Dr. Jennifer Dilts is a pediatrician with a love for blending science, curiosity, and whole-child care. After earning her biology degree from Wake Forest University, she completed her D.O. and MHA at A.T. Still University and her pediatric residency at Riley Hospital for Children. She spent over a decade in general pediatrics before expanding her expertise into headache medicine and medical acupuncture, earning board certifications in both. Dr. Dilts has also completed advanced training in ADHD, anxiety, depression, pediatric hypnosis, and medical education. Along the way, she has served as a principal investigator in multiple clinical headache trials. Her work reflects a commitment to thoughtful, integrative care that helps kids feel better, function better, and thrive. Learn more with Dr. Dilts on the ADHD Mom Docs Podcast.

ADHD Mom Docs

👥 Who Can Join?

Any middle or high school student:

• Diagnosed with ADHD or just wondering if ADHD may be affecting them

• Struggling with impulsivity, talking or doing before thinking, doing what needs to be done, or taking risks

• Interested in learning practical life skills

Parents or caregivers are welcome to attend alongside their teen if their teen would like additional support.

You do not need to be a member of CHADD or ADHDKC to attend. (Though families are encouraged to explore CHADD membership for additional resources and support.)

Sign up here

📖 Something Exciting is Happening NOW for Adults …

ADHDKC’s new Book Club was created for curious minds, supportive conversations, and practical, real‑life insights.

Each quarter, we’re diving into a new book together. Inside the Group Forum on ADHDKC’s website, you’ll find a weekly discussion prompt from hosts Dr. Tish Taylor and Dr. Caroline Danda to help us stay engaged as we read.

It’s a gentle accountability boost — because ADHD brains love thinking about reading… but actually finishing the book is another story. And even if you don’t get through the chapters, you’re still welcome to jump into the forum, follow the conversation, and learn alongside everyone else.

Our discussion in the online forum has started but it’s not to late to jump in. Join us as we talk about ADHD 2.0 by Drs. Hallowell and Ratey. In August, we’ll gather on Zoom for a relaxed, big‑picture conversation about the book as a whole. The Wrap-Up session will be August 6th at 7 PM CST.

If you’ve been looking for a fresh way to connect with ADHDKC, this might be your next chapter.

Join the Group Forum discussion now and register for the August Zoom Wrap-up session.

Groups Page

ZOOM WRAP UP SESSION

The Smart Kid Paradox: Why Bright Kids with ADHD Still Struggle

Adam shared a powerful perspective on why intelligence can sometimes hide ADHD rather than protect against it. Families learned:

• Why ADHD is about much more than paying attention

• How executive dysfunction creates a gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it

• Why homework battles happen even when kids understand the material

• How emotional regulation plays a bigger role than many parents realize

• Simple strategies that reduce overwhelm and help children get started

Parents especially appreciated Adam’s personal stories about growing up with ADHD, his practical advice, and his compassionate reminder that our children aren’t lazy—they’re often working much harder than it appears.

Keep the Conversation Going in August

Adam helped us understand why executive functioning (EF) is so difficult for many people with ADHD.

Next month, Sarah Kesty will focus on the next step: What can you actually do to help?

She’ll share practical, evidence-based strategies you can begin using immediately with your children and teens to support planning, organization, task initiation, working memory, and other executive functioning skills.

If July explained the “why,” August is all about the “how.”

Learn more about EF strategies

For Teens: Homework Without the Battles

In August, our ADHDKC Teen Group will tackle one of the topics teens requested most: How do I get my homework done when I don’t want to?

Rather than adults telling them what they should do, this interactive session will help middle and high school students explore practical ways to bridge the gap between knowing they have homework and actually getting started.

No homework but struggling with lack of motivation to get stuff done? They can use the tools to get chores and boring tasks done too!

Learn more and RSVP to get stuff done

Explore All Upcoming ADHDKC Events

Whether you’re a parent, teen, adult with ADHD, or educator, we have programs designed to support every stage of the ADHD journey.

Visit: adhdkc.org/event-list to see our full calendar of upcoming groups, workshops, and events.

Find All the Upcoming Events

We hope you’ll watch Adam’s recording, then join us live next month as we continue building practical tools that help families thrive with ADHD.

If you’ve ever watched your bright, capable child forget assignments, get overwhelmed by simple tasks, or shut down when school gets stressful, this episode is for you.

In our newest ADHDKC Conversations episode, we sit down with Sarah Kesty—executive function coach, educator, author, and host of the Executive Function Podcast—to unpack one of the most misunderstood parts of ADHD: executive function.

Sarah has spent nearly 20 years helping neurodivergent students and families build practical, brain-friendly systems that actually work. In this conversation, she shares strategies that can reduce conflict at home while helping teens build the independence we all want for them.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why executive function is much more than organization and time management

• Why knowing what to do is not the same as being able to do it

• The difference between a lack of skill and a lack of will

• Why bright students often struggle despite their intelligence

• How parents can move from being the “manager” to becoming a trusted “consultant”

• Why visual reminders and calendars work better than repeated verbal reminders

• What to do instead of lecturing when your child is overwhelmed or dysregulated

• How allowing kids to experiment with their own systems—even imperfect ones—helps them become more independent

• How understanding their own brain can replace shame with confidence

One of our favorite takeaways:

“If they can’t do it, assume it’s a lack of skill, not will.”

That simple mindset shift can completely change how we respond to our children—and how they begin to see themselves.

Sarah also gives us a preview of her upcoming ADHDKC Parent Group presentation, where she’ll share even more practical executive function strategies parents can start using immediately.

Learn More & RSVP for Sarah's Talk

Resources

Sarah Kesty - Brain Tools School

Sarah Kesty - Executive Function Podcast

Ace Your Time Google Calendar App

Brainstorm by Dan Siegel

Good Sleep Guide for Neurodivergent Kids by Melissa Moore

About Our Guest

Sarah Kesty is an executive function, ADHD, and autism coach, educator, author, and speaker dedicated to helping neurodivergent individuals thrive. She is the founder of Brain Tools School and host of the Executive Function Podcast.

A 4-time Teacher of the Year, Sarah brings nearly two decades of experience supporting students and families in building real-life executive function skills that make daily life smoother and more manageable.

She specializes in translating research into practical, actionable strategies that families and educators can use right away. Her work has been featured in publications such as Psychology Today, Edutopia, and state and national education organizations.

Sarah’s engaging, down-to-earth style focuses on creating brain-friendly systems, inclusive environments, and sustainable strategies that empower teens and young adults to build independence and confidence.

Watch or Listen Wherever You Prefer

You can:

• 🎥 Watch the video right here in this newsletter

• 🌐 Watch on the ADHDKC website

• ▶️ Watch on our YouTube channel

• 🎧 Listen on your favorite podcast app wherever you get podcasts

Whether you prefer watching or listening during your commute, we’ve made it easy to learn in the format that works best for you.

Help More Families Find These Resources

If you find our podcast helpful, we’d be incredibly grateful if you would:

• ❤️ Like the episode

• 👍 Subscribe or Follow the podcast

• ⭐ Leave a rating or review

• 📤 Share it with another parent, educator, or professional

Those small actions make a huge difference. They help YouTube and podcast platforms recommend our episodes to other families who may be searching for answers but don’t yet know where to find them.

Together, we can help more people understand ADHD and neurodiversity—one conversation at a time.

Happy listening!

—The ADHDKC Team

QUICK DETAILS

• Sunday, July 26

• 2:30–3:30 PM: Facilitated discussion and educational content

• 3:30–4:30 PM: Optional connection and networking time

• Central Resource Library – Logan Conference Room

Save Your Seat

Living and working with ADHD often means finding creative ways to make the workplace fit your brain rather than constantly trying to fit your brain into someone else’s system. While workplace accommodations can be powerful tools, many ADHDers aren’t sure what accommodations are available, how to request them, or what they actually look like in everyday life.

Join us for a practical, discussion-based Women’s Group focused on real-world examples of workplace accommodations. Together, we’ll explore the strategies, tools, and adjustments that have helped ADHD adults succeed at work—and discuss the challenges that can arise along the way.

This is not a lecture about employment law. Instead, we’ll learn from one another’s experiences, share ideas, and discuss practical approaches for advocating for the support you need.

During this session, we’ll discuss:

• Common workplace challenges experienced by ADHD adults

• Examples of formal and informal accommodations

• Strategies that have worked in different industries and work environments

• How to communicate needs with supervisors and coworkers

• Barriers people have encountered and lessons learned

• Ideas for self-advocacy and problem-solving

New Women’s Group Format

We’re excited to pilot a new format for our Women’s Group!

2:30–3:30 PM: Facilitated discussion and educational content

3:30–4:30 PM: Optional connection and networking time

Stay for the full event or attend only the discussion portion. The second hour provides an opportunity to connect with other women who understand the unique challenges and strengths of living with ADHD.

RSVP

Important Information

This event is free and open to the public.

This group is intended for adult women with ADHD or ADHD traits, whether formally diagnosed, self-identified, or still exploring the possibility that ADHD may be part of their story.

No registration fee. All are welcome.

ADHDKC is a nonprofit organization run by volunteers and dedicated to fostering education, support, and connection.

This session is intended for educational and peer support purposes only and does not provide medical, psychological, legal, or mental health treatment or advice.

• Participation in discussion is always optional

• Listening is welcome

• Personal experiences and practical strategies are encouraged

• This group does not replace individualized professional care

The meeting is facilitated to help ensure a safe, supportive, and respectful environment for all attendees.

While we hope participants leave feeling empowered, informed, and connected, this event is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, legal consultation, or medical treatment.

Invite a Friend!

It’s more fun with friends - invite a friend to join you.

One of the most common things we hear is, “I wish I had found ADHDKC sooner.” Whether someone is a parent trying to understand their child’s struggles, an adult newly diagnosed with ADHD, or a family looking for community, finding the right support can make all the difference.

As a volunteer-led CHADD chapter, ADHDKC grows primarily through word of mouth. Every comment, share, review, and conversation helps connect another person with resources, education, and a community that understands.

If ADHDKC has helped you, here are some simple ways you can help us reach more people while strengthening our existing community.

Listen, Follow, and Share Our Podcast

Our ADHDKC Conversations podcast features practical strategies, expert insights, and real-world experiences from professionals, parents, and individuals living with ADHD. These are shared as they’re released right here in our newsletter.

We share two types of podcasts:

• Short chats with upcoming Parent Group speakers to learn about them, how they came to be an expert in the area they’ll talk about, and a glimpse into what will be covered. These are generally a quick 20-30 minutes to help you decide if you should sign up for the upcoming talk.

• Full-length recordings of the Parent Group events when allowed by the speaker. These are generally about an hour if you missed the talk - or want to listen to it again.

Follow, listen, rate, and review the podcast on your favorite platform. Sharing an episode that resonated with you is one of the easiest ways to introduce ADHDKC to someone who could benefit.

ADHDKC Conversations on Spotify

ADHDKC Conversations on Apple Podcasts

Request Fliers or Trifolds for Your School or Clinic, or Invite ADHDKC to Staff a Table at an Event

ADHDKC is always working to get helpful, hopeful information into the hands of families who need it — but we don’t always know the right contact person at every school, clinic, or community organization. If you can help us make those connections, we’re more than happy to send brochures, fliers, or other materials their way.

Here are a few simple ways you can help expand our reach:

• Mention ADHDKC to your pediatrician, therapist, school counselor, or healthcare provider.

• Share our resources with your child’s school, PTA, homeschool group, or workplace.

• Connect us with community events where families may have questions or need support.

• Let schools and organizations know we can assist with teacher trainings or provide resources for workplaces supporting neurodivergent staff.

If you have a contact or an idea, just send Dr. Stuppy the person’s information along with what you’d like ADHDKC to provide. She’ll take it from there — whether that means sending materials or coordinating someone to attend an event.

Together, we can make sure every family in our community knows they’re not alone.

Subscribe to Our YouTube Channel

Many of our presentations, educational videos, and resources are available on YouTube.

Even if you’ve already watched a video, subscribing, liking, commenting, and sharing helps our content reach more families through YouTube’s recommendations.

ADHDKC on YouTube

Engage with Our Social Media Posts

Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn algorithms prioritize content that receives engagement.

You can help by:

• Liking posts

• Commenting with your thoughts or experiences

• Tagging a friend who might benefit

• Sharing posts to your own feed or stories

A simple comment can help hundreds of additional people see important ADHD-related information. We really appreciate all the interactions!

If an article, event announcement, or resource has been helpful to you, consider forwarding it to a friend, family member, teacher, healthcare provider, coach, or colleague.

Many of our newest members discovered ADHDKC because someone took a moment to share a newsletter. While this edition doesn’t have our typical content, it does have links to our podcast, YouTube, groups, and events, so it still might be appreciated by a friend who is struggling with ADHD.

Share

Invite Someone to an Event

Sometimes people feel nervous attending an ADHD support group, workshop, or social event for the first time.

Inviting a friend, spouse, grandparent, or another parent can make that first step easier. Personal invitations remain one of the most effective ways to build community.

ADHDKC Events

Join the Conversation in Our Book Club Forum

Our online book club isn’t just about reading—it’s about connecting, learning, and sharing experiences.

Participating in discussions helps create a richer experience for everyone, whether you’re asking questions, sharing insights, or offering encouragement.

Find the Book Club and other Groups

Participate in Our Online Groups

One of the best ways to strengthen our community is to actively participate in our private discussion groups.

Ask a question, share a success, offer a recommendation, or encourage another member. Every interaction helps someone feel less alone.

ADHDKC Online Groups

Leave a Google Review

Positive reviews help people find ADHDKC when searching for ADHD resources and support in the Kansas City area.

If ADHDKC has made a difference for you or your family, we’d be grateful if you’d take a few minutes to share your experience.

leave a Google Review

Additional Ways to Support ADHDKC

You can also help by:

• Nominating us in the Community Votes Overland Park. The nomination period is open from June 2 to September 27. Come back to vote when voting opens up.

  Nominate ADHDKC

• Wearing ADHDKC apparel or using ADHDKC merchandise when available.

  Find Apparel and More

• Becoming a CHADD member, listing ADHDKC as your chapter, and encouraging others to join.

  Join CHADD

• Sharing your ADHDKC success story with others who may be struggling.

• Recommending ADHDKC resources in local online parenting and community groups when appropriate.

  Feel free to share this Newsletter with anyone who would benefit from our services.

  Share

Thank You

Every podcast listen, social media comment, event invitation, review, and shared resource helps another person discover that they don’t have to navigate ADHD alone.

Thank you for helping ADHDKC grow awareness, build connections, and create a stronger community for individuals and families affected by ADHD. Together, we’re making it easier for people to find the support they need when they need it most. ❤️

Quick Facts

📅 Tuesday, July 14th

⏰ 6:30 PM CST

💻 Online Event

🎟️ Cost: Free for Parents, Educators & Adults wanting to learn to how to better support teens

Sign up here

“Very bright… but not working to potential.”

If you’re parenting a child with ADHD, you’ve probably heard that comment more than once.

You may have also watched your child:

• Sit glued to a 4-hour NFL game, tracking and remembering every stat, every play

• Then struggle to get through 15 minutes of homework

And it leaves you wondering:

👉 Why can they focus sometimes—but not when it matters?

👉 Why does school feel so hard for a child who is clearly so capable?

This talk answers the question you’re already asking: WHY

In this eye-opening session, you’ll finally understand what’s really happening in your child’s brain—and why the gap between ability and performance is so frustratingly wide.

Spoiler: it’s not laziness, defiance, or lack of motivation.

Join us with guest speaker Adam Tilove

Adam Tilove is a certified executive coach, author, and former Head of School with 11 years of experience leading independent schools.

Late-diagnosed with ADHD as an adult, Adam built the NeuroDiscipline framework after recognizing that the gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it isn’t a motivation problem — it’s a mechanics problem. His book, Split Second: Stop Stalling. Start Doing., launched in April 2026. Adam works with high-performing professionals and young adults who are tired of watching potential go unrealized.

What You’ll Learn

✔️ Why smart kids with ADHD struggle in traditional school settings

✔️ The real reason behind “inconsistent performance”

✔️ How the dopamine system drives attention (and why homework loses every time)

✔️ The hidden shame cycle that can quietly erode confidence

✔️ Why this is a mechanics problem—not a motivation problem

✔️ Practical ways to support your child without constant battles

RSVP

🎁 Bonus for Attendees

Adam will also be offering a free giveaway during the event to help you start applying what you learn right away.

Who Should Attend

This event is for you if:

• Your child is bright but struggling in school

• You’re tired of hearing “they just need to try harder”

• Homework is a daily source of stress

• You want to better understand—not just manage—your child’s ADHD

  I want to join

Why This Matters

When kids repeatedly fall short of expectations they know they should meet, it doesn’t just impact grades—it impacts identity.

Understanding the why behind your child’s struggles is the first step toward changing the pattern.

Reminders

🔔 This session is presented by an ADHD coach and is intended to provide general information, guidance, and support around ADHD-related topics. While we’ll cover helpful strategies and leave time for questions and discussion, please keep in mind that this presentation is not a substitute for personalized medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment.

If you have specific concerns about your own situation or that of a loved one, we encourage you to follow up with your healthcare provider or a qualified mental health professional. We also ask that everyone respect the privacy of others and help us maintain a supportive, inclusive space for open dialogue.

First, For the Adults In the Room

Our ADHDKC Book Club is officially underway, and this week’s prompt is live in our private forum — but the conversation needs you.

If you’ve been meaning to jump in (or forgot… or forgot that you forgot), consider this your gentle nudge. The weekly questions help us stay accountable, reflect together, and actually finish the book before our wrap‑up Zoom chat on August 6, 2026, 7–8 PM CDT.

Zoom wrap-up sign up

If you’ve read ADHD 2.0, want to read it, or are just curious but know you won’t get around to actually reading, join the group and the conversation to discuss the topics and questions raised in the book. Everyone can participate and learn.

Come share what resonated with you or what you’re noticing in your kids, students, or yourself.

Join the private forum and jump into the discussion — even one comment keeps the momentum going.

Join the online forum

💻 Tween/Teen Event Details

📅 Tuesday, July 7th (NEW DATE!)

⏰ 5:30 PM CST

💻 Online via Zoom

💸 FREE for all Middle and High School Students (10 - 18 years and their parents)

🔗 RSVP with the link below to get your Zoom link rsvp

RSVP

Why does this topic sound familiar?

Out of many RSVPs, we had just one attendee show up to the June ADHDKCTeen talk, so we’ll offer this topic again in July to give more teens a chance to participate.

A small request: if you RSVP and later realize you can’t attend, please update your registration. We put a lot of time into preparing these sessions, and when most of the group can’t make it, we’re always willing to adjust the schedule. Clear communication helps us keep these programs accessible, meaningful, and worth your time.

Why Can’t I Stop?

Impulse Control, Risk & Doing What Matters

Middle and high school can feel overwhelming when your brain seems to move faster than your ability to hit pause.

Do you ever:

• Act before thinking and regret it later?

• Struggle to stop gaming, scrolling, or procrastinating?

• Make risky choices in the moment even when you know better?

• Feel like your brain wants one thing, while your goals need something else?

If so, you’re not alone — and you’re definitely not broken.

Join ADHDKCTeen for an engaging, interactive online event designed specifically for middle and high school students to better understand impulsivity, ADHD, motivation, and how to make safer, smarter choices.

Sign us up

What Teens Will Learn

During this supportive and relatable session, participants will:

• Better understand why ADHD brains often struggle with impulse control

• Explore how impulsivity affects emotions, decision-making, motivation, and daily life

• Learn how ADHD can increase vulnerability to risky behaviors

• Recognize common triggers that make impulsive choices more likely

• Build practical strategies for slowing down, making safer decisions, and doing what matters most

• Strengthen confidence through systems that support success rather than relying on willpower alone

This event combines real-world strategies, interactive discussion, relatable examples, and practical tools teens can actually use.

Why This Matters

Impulsivity doesn’t just affect homework or chores — it can impact friendships, emotional regulation, self-esteem, safety, and long-term goals.

By understanding how their brains work, teens can begin building stronger self-awareness and practical skills to:

• Pause before risky decisions

• Reduce emotional reactivity

• Improve follow-through

• Strengthen independence

• Build confidence in their ability to manage ADHD challenges

  RSVP HERE

Event Format

This is a highly interactive online Zoom session designed for ADHD brains. With a smaller group format (typically 5–10 participants join), teens have space to participate comfortably while learning alongside others who “get it.”

Presented by Pediatric Experts

Kristen Stuppy, MD and Jennifer Dilts, DO - Pediatricians dedicated to helping teens understand ADHD and build practical, real-world skills.

Dr. Kristen Stuppy is a pediatrician in Overland Park with more than 25 years of experience caring for kids and navigating neurodiversity, both in clinic and at home. She’s passionate about helping children and parents understand ADHD and learn practical ways to manage symptoms. While she prescribes medication when appropriate, she also recognizes that many families face real barriers to therapy or coaching. By leading ADHDKC’s monthly teen events, she creates an accessible, welcoming space where middle and high schoolers can build skills, gain confidence, and feel supported as they grow. Check out Dr. Stuppy’s Substack to learn more with her.

Dr Stuppy's "Quest for Health KC"

Dr. Jennifer Dilts is a pediatrician with a love for blending science, curiosity, and whole-child care. After earning her biology degree from Wake Forest University, she completed her D.O. and MHA at A.T. Still University and her pediatric residency at Riley Hospital for Children. She spent over a decade in general pediatrics before expanding her expertise into headache medicine and medical acupuncture, earning board certifications in both. Dr. Dilts has also completed advanced training in ADHD, anxiety, depression, pediatric hypnosis, and medical education. Along the way, she has served as a principal investigator in multiple clinical headache trials. Her work reflects a commitment to thoughtful, integrative care that helps kids feel better, function better, and thrive. Learn more with Dr. Dilts on the ADHD Mom Docs Podcast.

ADHD Mom Docs

👥 Who Can Join?

Any middle or high school student:

• Diagnosed with ADHD or just wondering if ADHD may be affecting them

• Struggling with impulsivity, talking or doing before thinking, doing what needs to be done, or taking risks

• Interested in learning practical life skills

Parents or caregivers are welcome to attend alongside their teen if their teen would like additional support.

You do not need to be a member of CHADD or ADHDKC to attend. (Though families are encouraged to explore CHADD membership for additional resources and support.)

Sign up here

📖 Something Exciting is Happening NOW for Adults …

ADHDKC is growing — and we’re thrilled to introduce our new Book Club, created for curious minds, supportive conversations, and practical, real‑life insights.

Each quarter, we’ll dive into a new book together. Inside the Group Forum on ADHDKC’s website, you’ll find a weekly discussion prompt to help us stay engaged as we read. It’s a gentle accountability boost — because ADHD brains love thinking about reading… but actually finishing the book is another story. And even if you don’t get through the chapters, you’re still welcome to jump into the forum, follow the conversation, and learn alongside everyone else.

Our discussion in the online forum has started. Join us as we talk about ADHD 2.0 by Drs. Hallowell and Ratey. In August, we’ll gather on Zoom for a relaxed, big‑picture conversation about the book as a whole. The Wrap-Up session will be August 6th at 7 PM CST.

If you’ve been looking for a fresh way to connect with ADHDKC, this might be your next chapter.

Join the Group Forum discussion now and register for the August Zoom Wrap-up session.

Groups Page

ZOOM WRAP UP SESSION

Event Details

• Date: July 5th

• Time: 2:00 PM – 4:00 PM

• Location: Lenexa City Center Library, Meeting Room 2

Save My Seat

Don’t miss updates about our Book Club below the Adult Group Event information!

You found a planner system that worked perfectly... for a week.

You started exercising regularly... until life got busy.

You finally discovered a coping strategy that helped you stay focused, manage emotions, or reduce stress... and then somehow stopped using it.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone.

Many adults with ADHD don’t struggle because they lack good strategies—they struggle because consistency can be one of the hardest executive function skills to maintain. Even when we know something helps, it can be difficult to remember it, prioritize it, or keep it going when routines change.

Join us for an open and supportive discussion as we explore:

• Why consistency can be challenging for ADHD brains

• Common obstacles that derail helpful routines and coping strategies

• Ways to make self-care and support systems easier to maintain

• How to recover when you’ve fallen off track without shame or self-criticism

• Practical strategies for building sustainability instead of perfection

During the discussion portion of the meeting, participants are encouraged to bring a coping skill, routine, tool, app, mindset shift, or strategy that has helped them. Whether it’s something you’ve used for years or something you recently discovered, your experience may help someone else in the group.

No preparation is required, and sharing is always optional.

RSVP

Who Should Attend?

This group is designed for adults with ADHD, adults who suspect they may have ADHD, and adults interested in learning more about ADHD-related challenges and strengths. Whether you’re newly diagnosed or have been managing ADHD for years, you’ll find a welcoming community of people who understand.

About ADHDKC Adult Group

ADHDKC Adult Group provides a supportive, judgment-free space for adults to connect, share experiences, learn practical strategies, and build community. Meetings are discussion-based and focus on real-life challenges and solutions for living with ADHD.

We hope you’ll join us as we explore how to make helpful strategies stick—and how to be kinder to ourselves when they don’t.

This event is free and open to the public.

ADHDKC is a nonprofit organization run by volunteers and dedicated to providing education, support, and community connection.

This session is designed for educational and peer support purposes only and does not provide medical, psychological, or mental health treatment or advice.

• Participation in discussion is always optional

• Listening is welcome

• Personal stories and shared strategies are encouraged

• Treatment recommendations will not be provided

The group is facilitated by a licensed mental health professional to help maintain a safe, supportive, and respectful environment.

While we hope attendees gain valuable insights, practical tools, and meaningful connection, this event is not a substitute for therapy, diagnosis, or medical treatment.

You Are Not Alone

If you’ve spent years wondering why life has felt harder than it seemed for others—or if you’re learning to understand yourself through a new ADHD lens—this event is an opportunity to connect with others who truly understand.

Come as you are. Share if you’d like. Listen if you prefer.

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We look forward to seeing you there.

Save My Seat

📚 ADHDKC Book Club: Join the Conversation!

We’re currently reading ADHD 2.0 by Dr. Edward Hallowell and Dr. John Ratey together as part of the new ADHDKC Book Club, and we’d love for you to join us!

Each week, we’re posting discussion questions in our online community to help us explore the book’s ideas, share experiences, and learn from one another. You can follow along at your own pace and participate whenever it works for you. ADHDKC’s online forums are designed to keep learning and connection going between events, whether you attend meetings, engage online, or both.

👉 Join the discussion at: ADHDKC Online Groups & Forums

Online Forum

We’ll wrap up this first book with a live online discussion on Thursday, August 6 at 7:00 PM: ADHD Book Club: ADHD 2.0 Discussion Meeting

RSVP for the Zoom Wrap-Up

Haven’t started the book?

Didn’t finish a chapter?

Not planning to read it at all?

You’re still welcome.

Some of the best learning happens when people share their questions, experiences, and perspectives. The more people who participate, the more we all learn. So jump into the discussion, react to a post, ask a question, or share something that resonated with you. Every contribution adds value.

Whether you’re reading every page, listening to the audiobook, skimming a chapter, or simply curious about ADHD, we’d love to have you as part of the conversation. 📖💙

~ Or attended and want to revisit the great information shared?

We’re excited to share the recording of our June Parent Group presentation, “Anxious Brains and Tools That Help,” featuring pediatrician Dr. Jennifer Dilts.

In this engaging discussion, Dr. Dilts explores the powerful connection between ADHD and anxiety, helping parents better understand:

• Why anxiety and ADHD so often occur together

• How anxious brains process situations differently

• The role of avoidance and reassurance in anxiety

• Practical coping tools that help children manage stress and worry

• Strategies for supporting emotional regulation at home

• Evidence-based treatments for anxiety, including cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT)

• How ADHD and anxiety symptoms can overlap—and what that means for treatment

Parents especially appreciated Dr. Dilts’ practical, compassionate approach to helping children build confidence, resilience, and coping skills while navigating both ADHD and anxiety.

Watch or Listen Your Way

You can access this presentation in whichever format works best for you:

▶️ Watch the recording right here in our newsletter

📖 Read along with the transcript below

▶️ Watch on our ADHDKC YouTube channel

🎧 Listen as a podcast on your favorite podcast platform - look for ADHD KC Conversations

Whether you’re folding laundry, commuting, taking a walk, or sitting down with a cup of coffee, you can learn at your own pace.

Don’t Miss Future ADHDKC Content

Each month, ADHDKC brings you expert presentations, support groups, podcasts, book discussions, and practical ADHD resources for parents, adults, women, and teens.

ADHDKC Events

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• Subscribe to our newsletter for upcoming events and resources

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The more connected you stay, the more tools, support, and community you’ll have on your ADHD journey.

We hope you’ll enjoy this valuable conversation and share it with another parent who could benefit from understanding the ADHD–anxiety connection.

Resources & Dr. Dilts Information

• Slides

• Meg Foundation - megfoundationforpain.org

• Dr. Dilts’ website - drjenniferdilts.com

• ADHD Moms Podcast - letstalkkidshealth.org/Podcasts

• Flusterclux Podcast - flusterclux.com

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Group Overview

01:58 Understanding Anxiety and ADHD

04:43 The Nature of Anxiety

07:41 Anxiety in Children and Teens

10:31 Coping Mechanisms for Anxiety

13:23 The Brain and Anxiety

16:40 Avoidance and Its Consequences

19:27 Modeling Coping Strategies

22:30 Words Matter: Validating Emotions

25:38 Normalizing Anxiety

28:28 Practical Tools for Parents

31:31 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

34:26 Modeling Emotions for Kids

38:18 Understanding and Naming Anxiety

42:44 Techniques for Regulating Stress

49:59 Assessing and Treating Anxiety in Children

55:50 Navigating ADHD and Anxiety Together

Transcript

AI generated - excuse the mistakes

speaker (00:00)

Welcome everybody as you’re joining in. Dr. Danda, did you want to introduce yourself since you’re relatively new to the group?

Yes. I’m Caroline Danda and I am a psychologist. and I’ve got three kiddos that all have ADHD in some form. And so I recently joined the board of ADHD KC and very excited to help co-host the parent support group. And

glad to be here because it’s just a I it’s been a long time coming because this has been such a wealth of information. everybody, I’m just gonna go over the since the CHADD agreements here and then I’ll turn it back over to Kristen. just really be kind. Be kind, be respectful. you know, be yourself, don’t try to be anyone else. what we talk about in here, we want to maintain

confidentiality when appropriate. and then we are recording this. So it will go up on the website for people to be able to watch that as well.

But we’re glad everybody is here. We’re super excited for the turnout. And I’ll let Kristen continue on. All right. I make her do the yucky stuff. not really yucky, but just agreements. Not always fun. but I get to talk about things that are up and coming and I’m very excited. We have several great speakers lined up.

Next month will be the Smart Kids Paradox. You know, all of us who have known that kid who’s just not living up to his potential, so smart, but not doing great. Adam Tillove will talk about that. And then Sarah Ketsky will be talking about executive functioning strategies for teens the following month. And I know that will hit right as school is probably about ready to get going and parents are going to want to get their kids set for school. So that’ll be great timing. I also have the CHADD National Event Calendar.

Many of the CHADD chapters like ours will post their online things and you’re welcome to join any of those. And then the new book club that Dr. Danda is co-leading is going on now. The adhdkc.org groups page has a book club group and there’s a forum there that’s discussing chapter by chapter, and they’ll wrap it up at the end on August 6th.

with a Zoom talk about the whole book. So if you want to read ADHD 2 .0 or maybe just listen in on what everybody else who’s reading it is learning, I highly encourage joining that book club.

So Dr. Fer Dr. Fur Doctor Jennifer Dilts is a pediatrician in the Kansas City metro area. She practices with Bloom Pediatrics, which is direct primary care, but she doesn’t do primary care. She focuses on ADHD anxiety and migraines, which don’t sound like they go together, but they really do. And I’m super excited. I’ve gotten to know her really well.

Through multiple channels, and I’m excited to hear her talk tonight about anxiety and ADHD. So I’d love to take it away. Thank you. I am excited to be here. I also now get the honor of co-facilitating with Dr. Stuppy the Teen Group. And so we have a lot of fun each month in the teen ADHD KC group.

So we’re talking today about anxious brains and tools that help.

And as Kristen said, I’m Dr. Jennifer Dilts and I practice at Bloom Pediatrics here in Kansas City. And also as Kristen said, I treat anxiety, ADHD, headaches, migraine, and depression. And then I am also board certified in acupuncture and I do acupuncture for both kids and adults, which is really fun.

The overlap, ‘cause cause as Kristen mentioned, it it seems like kind of a strange mix, but part of the overlap for me, or a big piece of the overlap and why I like treating all these conditions, is because I love teaching kids about their brains and how brains work and giving them tools, demystifying some of this so that they can have agency and feel successful.

And I also, in a strange sort of way, like talking about hard emotions and negative emotions. We all have them. And so I think it’s helpful for our kids when we are able to talk about them and when we feel comfortable talking about them, then they are gonna feel more comfortable bringing up hard things with us. And the other thing that we know is that our kids, whether they’re little kids or teens, are really good at coming up with stories, and we want them to have helpful.

And accurate narratives. And this is really easy to think about for me with ADHD because when a child gets an ADHD diagnosis, then a lot of times they can replace an unhelpful narrative like I’m just stupid or I’m the bad kid with no, I have ADHD. I have a fast brain. It’s harder for my brain to take that pause sometimes.

And so the same thing with anxiety and other hard emotions, we want our kids to be able to understand what’s happening in their brains and how their own brains work so that they have helpful information and they’re not telling themselves other stories that that aren’t as true or aren’t as helpful.

And so today we’re gonna run through how anxious brains work. It’s really interesting to me when I dig into anxiety that whether you’re four years old or 64 years old, whether you’re afraid of spiders or you’re afraid of public speaking, anxious brains tend to behave in predictable ways. And there are things that both for little kids, teens, and adults tend to help anxious brains too. And so we’re going to talk about how anxiety works and

How we can help our kids with negative emotions, including anxiety, and then the most important part, tools that help with anxiety and with other difficult emotions, both for ourselves as parents and for our kids. And it may seem maybe like a little bit of a reach. I don’t know that we’re talking about this in the ADHD parenting group. This isn’t specifically an anxiety group. I also want to say that.

I know Dr. Natasha Berger came and and talked to you all and her book, Managing Childhood Anxiety for Dummies, is a fantastic book. You can go back and watch her presentation that she did for ADHD KC here a few months ago. I watched it and I I think that she and I I think our presentations will go well together. I wanted to make sure I wasn’t repeating for you a lot of the info that she talked about and I I think

They just kind of complement each other nicely. And what we know is that anxiety and ADHD are good friends, depending on which study, which which set of data you you look at,

up to half of kids with and teens with ADHD also have an anxiety disorder. So 25 to 50% is kind of how that shakes out. And that is significantly higher than kids and teens who don’t have ADHD. Their rates of anxiety is more like 2 to 15%, sometimes as high as 25% in teens, depending on again which studies you’re looking at. But what we know is anxiety is super common, just like ADHD.

And if you have one condition, you are more likely to also have that other condition. One of the landmark ADHD studies, the MTA study.

Also found that a third of the kids in that study had anxiety with their ADHD. And one thing that I find just heartbreaking because anxiety is so treatable is that statistic or studies show that about 80% of kids and teens who meet criteria for an anxiety disorder don’t receive treatment. So not only is anxiety super common, just like ADHD is, but a lot of our kids and teens aren’t getting appropriate treatment for it. And we’ll talk about what that appropriate.

treatment as towards the the end of the talk because there are so many things as parents that you all can be doing to to help your kids no matter where they fall kind of on that anxiety spectrum and then there are really good evidence-based therapies for kids who need extra help beyond what you’re providing as parents and

So if we advance my slide. Okay, so this you guys probably know who this is. This is anxiety from the inside out movies. You probably have seen the inside out movies. If not, watch them. They are really good. But I’m gonna have you guys humor me here for a minute. And if you feel comfortable, you can close your eyes and just think about for a few seconds here a time when you yourself felt anxious.

and try to recreate that scenario in your mind as far as where you were, what you were doing.

What the what the room was like, what was being said, if anything. And then think about how that felt to you in your body as far as any kind of physical emotions that that you had in that situation. And any kind of thoughts or narrative that were going through your head.

Okay, thanks for doing that with me. And you can open your eyes now. And anxiety is really normal. We all feel anxious at times. There’s a big spectrum. There are people like my husband who hardly anything gets him above a two out of ten on the anxiety scale. And then there are people like myself that are more just run anxious. And it’s not very hard for me to think of times that I’ve been anxious. what I spend a lot of time talking to.

my patients and their parents about as some anxiety is helpful and some isn’t. And my goal is never to even if I could magically make it so that someone was never anxious again, I wouldn’t want to do that for several reasons. And so I think it’s helpful for everyone to understand that some amount of anxiety is normal and is helpful. And the way I explain this to kids is I actually want you to be a little anxious or nervous when you’re in a parking lot because I want you to pay attention so that you don’t get

hit by a car.

It’s a little bit helpful if I’m nervous before a presentation because that motivates me to prepare for it and practice it. It’s a little helpful if you’re a little nervous before your soccer game because that makes you really alert and ready to go and paying good attention. And so it’s helpful to know that that a little bit of anxiety helps us to perform well. Also, if we never felt anxious, that means we’re never going out of our comfort zones, right? And so we want to be able to take risks, we want to encourage

Our kids to take healthy risks, and so some of that is is going to come with some anxiety. And what I’m always looking for with my patients is I’m I’m asking three questions. Is this anxiety developmentally appropriate? Is it expected for the situation? And is it interfering with things you either want to do or need to do? So developmentally appropriate is pretty easy to understand. There are a lot of things that preschoolers may be anxious about that we don’t still expect.

expect our preteens or teenagers to be anxious about. Like we know that preschoolers they may have a hard time separating from mom or dad, especially at the beginning of a new school year and when school is really new for them. They may be really anxious about the dark.

Or sleeping someplace other than their own home. And as kids get older, we expect that they won’t be as anxious about those things. And so if if I’m seeing a teenager who is still really anxious about going to school every day, that’s a different situation than if we’re dealing with that with a preschooler. Also, is it expected for this situation? Just like we talked about, there are some situations where it’s helpful and

Really expected to be anxious if someone goes through a really scary thing, if if they’re involved in a car accident or

they had a house fire or their parents are separating or something like that. We know that they’re going to be anxious. That’s expected. We’re going to help them through that. But that’s very different than a child who is really, really scared of someone breaking into their home or a car accident when no one that they know has gone through that and they haven’t gone through that. And then the third one and the biggest one is is anxiety interfering with the things you want to do or need to do? And so for our kids, this these are things like school.

and being able to do things with friends and being able to sleep well at night and and those kinds of things. And so if kids are a little anxious with those types of things, but then they’re able to work through that and parents are able to support them through that and they’re able to still do those things and they’re happy most of the time at those things, then that’s not really a kiddo that that I’m too worried about. But we’re we’re more concerned certainly when when anxiety is interfering with those kinds of things.

And so we know anxiety is common. It often starts in preschool years, and the younger the child, the more somatic are body symptoms that they’re probably going to have. And so the younger kids are typically not telling us that they’re anxious or stressed necessarily, but they may be talking about headaches and belly pain and nausea. And so these are really common symptoms of anxiety, as as you all probably know. And these things still happen when we’re

teenagers than when we’re adults as as you probably could think of when I ask you to remember that time you were anxious recently and how that felt in your body.

There are also multiple types of anxiety. It comes in several different flavors. So there is separation anxiety, which just as you probably can can figure out, has to do with when kids are separating from typically their parents and how hard that is for them. Generalized anxiety is a lot of worry about future things that may happen and how other people are thinking about them and and that kind of thing. Panic, again, is gonna be those somatic body symptoms.

school avoidance. I kind of wish it was named something different like school anxiety because a lot of times I these kids are not.

necessarily wanting to avoid school as as their primary intention, but they’re really, really anxious about school. And as we’re gonna talk about, anxious brains really like to avoid. And so it comes out as avoidance when kids are really anxious about going to school. And then the last one is social anxiety. So anxiety about being in groups and talking in public and being around other people.

And like I alluded to earlier, anxious brains behave in really predictable ways. And so the first way that anxious brains or the first thing anxious brains do is we tend to overestimate the chances of something bad happening. And then we tend to underestimate our ability to cope. And so though those two things together is is not a great combo. So what that can look like is if the teacher calls on me in school, I am gonna freeze up, I’m not gonna

Know what to say, I’m not gonna know the answer, and I’m not gonna be able to handle it. I’m gonna have to run out of the room. And so again, this overestimating the risk of bad things happening, whether that’s tornadoes or fires or mom forgetting to pick me up, and then underestimating our ability to handle that situation if it does occur. anxious brings want lots of certainty and reassurance. And you can probably think about examples of of when you’ve had that happen perhaps as a parent where

you you initially for an anxious kid, when they’re asking something, you will give them the answer like, Mom, is there gonna be a tornado tonight? And you’ll say, No, I don’t think so. And the kid will feel better for a few minutes. And then they’ll ask again, Are you sure there’s not gonna be a tornado tonight? No, no, I really don’t think so. and then they’re wanting more and more reassurance. So that that reassurance only helps them for a few minutes and then they’re needing that again and again, and they’re wanting to look at the weather app and they’re wanting to have

all these other ways to to feel safe, but unfortunately that constant reassurance is is not really helping that child to feel more safe or build their coping skills. So we’ll talk about how to handle that here in a little bit.

And then the other thing, and you guys know this, is that anxious brains are not always rational. And so this is the child that she always does well on tests. She is so well prepared. She has studied and studied and studied. She’s never not done well on a test, but she is still worried that this time is going to be the time that she fails the test. Or a preschooler that mom always picks her up from school. She doesn’t have any reason to think that mom’s not going to pick her up today, but she’s still really worried mom is not going to pick her up today.

And this is a picture of me when I was six years old and in first grade. And this is my reminder to talk about anxious brains wanting to avoid. And as you can see, I put the anxious brain to avoid avoidance is short-term relief and long-term yuck. And when I was starting first grade, I was really, really anxious. And I remember my dad, who did not have any training.

And child development or child education or anything like that. But he did something really helpful for me. Instead of letting me skip and go home when I was feeling really anxious, he would walk up and down the hallway with me those first few days of first grade. And he was without really totally understanding the science behind it, he was doing several things. One is this co-regulation that we’ll talk about here in a little bit, where because he was calm, some of that calm kind of rubbed off on me.

And also he was walking back and forth with me. movement can be really helpful when we’re anxious. And he was giving me the time and space to kind of take a breath and have enough time to feel comfortable so that then in a supported way I could do this thing that was hard for me and that this thing that was causing me anxiety, which was going into my first grade classroom. And it is really, really normal as parents when our kids are coming to us and they’re wanting to.

Avoid something we want our kids to be safe and comfortable and feel happy and secure. And so our initial instinct a lot of times is to want to say yes to what they’re asking, right? And so if this is a kid who’s anxious about school, this might look like mom, my tummy hurts. I don’t think I can go to school today. Are you sure? Are you sure you can’t go to school? It could be your anxiety. No, no, I don’t think I can go to school today. And so if this happens once, then initially the mom says, Okay, maybe you’re

Getting sick, we’ll stay home from school. And so what happens? That child feels better, right? That child is so relieved. They do not have to go to school. The parent feels relieved because the child feels better. But as you can probably guess, there the chances of this happening tomorrow and in future school days are really, really high because that child didn’t have to kind of push through that hard thing. They didn’t develop those coping skills, and they didn’t get to work on doing that thing that is hard. They didn’t get to work on doing something.

something when when they’re anxious. And so a lot of times, as some of you may have experienced, when kids want to avoid, they just keep avoiding and avoiding and it becomes a bigger gr bigger thing instead of a smaller thing.

And I’m gonna take you through parts of the brain here for for just a minute. so we have our kind of reptilian brain or brainstem, and this is the part of our brain that is develops first, and sometimes we call this like the lizard brain, and this is what is involved in kind of our autonomic nervous system. So our heart beating and breathing and that kind of thing, the things that we don’t have to think about. And then a little further.

Up here we have the limbic brain. So this is our emotional or our feeling brain. This is where the amygdala lives that’s in charge of emotions. And then this part that’s behind your forehead is the prefrontal cortex, or this is your rational thinking part of the brain. And I think it’s really helpful. Some of you may have seen this before, where you can kind of do the brain like this, where here is like your brainstem, here is your amygdala, your thinking or your feeling part of the brain, and then here is your prefrontal cortex. And we just

Talk a lot in ADHD, especially about how this prefrontal cortex part is developing at least. It was at 7:30, actually, I guess. And so this part of your brain is going to be developing for a really long time. And what we know about anxious brains is that

When we get really anxious, we talked about how rational how emotional, anxious brains aren’t always rational, right? And what happens when you’re in fight or flight is that sometimes we talk about kind of flipping your lid and that this

this rational part of your brain is offline. And so what’s running this show is your amygdala, the emotional part of your brain. And since this part of your brain is developing until your mid twenties, this part of your brain, the emotional part of your brain, is really strong compared to the the thinking logical part of your brain. There’s kind of this mismatch where the emotional part of the brain is so strong. And that’s why so many or at least one of the reasons why so many

anxieties come out in preschool aged kids because they’ve got this really, really strong amygdala, really strong emotional part of the brain, and this prefrontal cortex hasn’t caught up yet. The amygdala and Dr. Burger talks about this in her book, that the amygdala is really active at night. So this is one of the reasons why adults or kids sometimes things feel like a lot bigger deal at night. All of our anxieties tend to come up at night, that amygdala is really working is really active at night.

And of course we can’t think rationally when we’re in fight or flight, right? I do this with the kids where when you’re when you flipped your lid, your parents can tell you all the the right reasons and all this emotional stuff, and you can’t hear it if you’re if you’re in this emotional part of your brain. And so, this is really good from an evolutionary standpoint. If you’ve got a car coming towards you or you’ve got a tiger chasing you, you don’t want to analyze all your options and really have this big thoughtful,

discussion about it or or think about it a lot. You want to run, you want to fight or flight, you want to get out of the way, but fight or flight is not meant to be in for long periods of time. And it’s not great at you know for kids at school, kids that are having school anxiety or or having anxieties about other things that fight or flight isn’t working in our favor in in that situation.

And so this is really helpful, I think, for parents and kids to understand that anxiety feels really overwhelming, especially if you don’t really understand how it works. And what happens with anxiety is it tends to get worse before it gets better. So if you use my example of when I showed you my first grade picture, and when I so

kind of on this part would have been thinking about going to school and getting up that morning and going to school. And then I would have been at this panic peak when I was outside the classroom and I wasn’t wanting to go in and I was feeling really anxious and my dad was walking with me. And then I went in the classroom. I’m still up here at the top.

But after I am in the classroom for a few minutes, I sit down. I start talking to the person next to me. I get involved in whatever’s going on in the classroom. And slowly my anxiety gets better, right? I start going down kind of the the

anxiety hill. same with public speaking. I get really, really anxious before I speak in public and my heart’s beating really fast right before I start speaking. The first few minutes I’m really anxious, but I’ve done this a lot now. And so when I when I get into it, I know that after the first few minutes I’m gonna start calming down and I’m gonna be

through that hard part. And so what we need to help kids understand is that they’ve got to stick it out through this hard part before it gets better. And that’s part of why pushing through that avoidance, that need to avoid is really helpful because if kids are always able to avoid what they’re doing is they’re going up this hill. And then right when it’s getting the hardest is when they’re running back down the hill. That’s when they’re avoiding. And with practice they can learn, I can go over this this

Hill. I can do things even when I’m really anxious because I’ve done it before and I know it gets easier. That’s me with public speaking, right? The first time I did it, maybe I really thought I would pass out, but I’ve done it enough times now that I know yeah, I can ride this out because it’ll get better. All right. One more thing. We know that words order that words matter a lot.

But especially when we’re talking about anxiety, I think and anything mental health related, I think words matter so much. And sometimes in a re in a well-meaning way, we may have used the phrase kind of just anxiety. And I think this feels really invalidating to to kids and not intentionally on our part, but an example of this would be mom, I can’t go to school today, my stomach hurts.

And then the parent may say, I think that’s just your anxiety, honey. You’re gonna be fine. I know you can go to school. And then sometimes when kids don’t feel believed, you know, they have really real belly pain. They have real nausea, they have real headaches. whatever those symptoms are, those are real symptoms. That is their body’s way of handling that anxiety. that’s the way that it’s coming out in the body. It can be a little different for all of us, but instead of just anxiety, I think it’s more helpful.

a lot of times to validate that anxiety and then still move on to what what that child can do supported with that anxiety. And so instead you might say when the child says

My stomach hurts, I can’t go to school. Ugh, it sounds like you might be feeling anxious. That is really hard. I’m sorry you’re feeling anxious. You know what? Do you remember last week when you felt so nervous and your stomach hurt and we were able to go to school? You you had a peppermint and drank some water and we went to school and then you felt better. I think we can do that again. So we’re we’re not saying

it’s just your anxiety. We’re validating that it’s their anxiety and then still going on to something that isn’t avoiding. Another thing, and and we deal with this with ADHD too, of course, that I don’t love that disorder is in the is in the word. anxiety disorder is the medical condition, just like attention deficit disorder is the medical condition.

For for fairly obvious reasons. A lot of times kids don’t kids or teens, they don’t like being told they have a disorder. They don’t want hearing about they don’t like hearing about that disorder. And so even though that’s the medical term, I really try to move more into anxiety condition or your anxiety or your stress or your stress response. Something that feels a little more normalizing because we all have, again, anxiety to some degree.

And the other thing, thankfully, I think we’re getting a little better better at as a as a society, but still have some ways to go, is talking more about mental health instead of mental illness. Just like just like we talk about physical health and we’re working on our physical health, all of us doing these things to support our physical health, we can really be all be working on supporting our mental health, whether we have a significant amount of anxiety or not. So I just thought that was worth mentioning.

And the other thing I I talk a lot about with my my patients and their parents is we all have anxiety. It’s helpful in some situations to have some anxiety and our goal, my goal

So even if I magically could get rid of all of your anxiety, I don’t want your anxiety to be zero because again, I want you to have a little bit of protective anxiety. I want you to have a little bit of anxiety to help you prepare for things that are important to you, like soccer games, like presentations, whatever those things are. And I want you to be going out of your comfort zone and trying new things. And it is part of trying new things to be a little bit nervous. But what we want to do is make sure that anxiety feels manageable so that.

You’re able in a supported way to do these things that still cause some anxiety. And when I think about normalizing anxiety, I kind of have two images that come to mind. So one is this little alien that says, I come in peace and kind of peacefully coexisting with anxiety. And the second is this car analogy. So again, anxiety is part of

our brains and our emotions and we don’t have to completely eliminate it. We don’t have to ignore it. But instead what we want to do is make it a little bit smaller if it’s feeling really big and powerful for a child. And instead of letting it be the driver, we want to put it in the backseat where sometimes anxiety can still can still talk to us, but it it doesn’t, it’s not driving the car. And so I think this can be helpful, a helpful way for kids and parents to kind of think about anxiety.

And we talked about a little bit, avoidance typically isn’t helpful. And so then of course the question is, well, what can I do instead then? And instead, we’re gonna support our kids and help them navigate this anxiety. And so one way for that, and I’m gonna talk about specific examples here in a minute, is modeling for kids, being brave and working through hard emotions like anxiety and then limiting reassurances too. And this can be easier.

said than done, I know, but especially now that we know that anxious brains work this way and that they want lots of certainty and they want reassurance, I think it can be really helpful to when you’re noticing that in your kiddo, especially if it’s a kid that tends to be more on the anxious end of things.

You can say something like, you know what? You already asked me that and I already answered that. So we’re gonna we’re gonna move on to something else. Or sometimes I know parents will say asked and answered if it’s something that their child is kind of repeatedly asking, or we’re gonna get into in a minute, naming your your worry. And so the other thing you can sometimes say is, I think that’s your worry bully talking to you. I I think we’ve we’ve already answered that. So we’re gonna go on to something else, but just limiting those reassurances because even though it may seem like

a a helpful thing when it’s going on and on then it’s not helpful and that child is just focused on continually getting more and more reassurance. And sometimes

You guys may have seen these feeling wheels or emotion wheels. And you can get these on Amazon and other places. My kids are all teenagers now and they would run away if they saw me coming towards them with a with an emotions wheel. But they can be really, really helpful for several reasons. I love the idea of using this. You can obviously use it if your child is upset and they’re having a big emotion. You can help them kind of find where it is on this wheel and name it.

the other thing that’s helpful for though is just modeling emotions and building that emotional vo vocabulary in general. So if you have this on your kitchen table, then maybe a couple nights a week when you guys are eating dinner, everyone goes around and says one emotion they felt that day and and how they kind of dealt with that or what that situation was like. just again kind of modeling for our kids.

That we can feel different emotions and that that’s okay and that we can work. no, make a murder baby. And another thing I I think can be so helpful is talking about kids, modeling times that you felt anxious or nervous or scared or upset or frustrated and how you handled that. We’re gonna do that, of course, in age appropriate ways. but I think we forget sometimes that the kids in our lives, whether those are our kids,

or other kids that were around, they a lot of times think that the adults that they look up to have everything all together. They don’t think that we have have hard things that we struggle with. And so it can be really helpful for us to kind of model that messy middle for our kids and again in age appropriate ways, let them know how we how we deal with things when when we have hard things.

And another way to do this, you guys have have probably some of you have done this probably are highlights and lowlights. You can do this with your kid at dinner, you can do it at the

You can do it before bed. It doesn’t have to be every night. You can do it when you remember. That’s totally fine. And I think as adults, we really an important thing is don’t just ask your kids for their highlights and lowlights, but we really need to to as the adults model our highlights and lowlights too. And again, this can look like I was really sad when at work today this presentation that I’d worked so hard on.

I didn’t feel like people really appreciated how hard I worked on that. Or that could be, you know, I felt really embarrassed because I think I accidentally hurt my friend’s feeling today and I’m gonna go apologize to her. Or again, just so kids kind of understand that even grown-ups have hard feelings and we’re still saying we’re sorry and we’re still disappointed. that’s just such a great way to model that for them and we want

them to be able to come to us and know that we’re not scared of of talking about these negative emotions, including anxiety.

And another thing that can be helpful that I’ve sometimes done with kids, besides just asking kids where they feel anxiety in their body, I do that a lot in visits. I will ask them when you we’ll talk about times that they feel anxious or stressed, whatever word feels best to them, and I’ll say, Where did that how do you feel that in your body? And of course I get kind of this deer in the headlight look, but then we kind of start walking through it and I’m like,

You know, what did your heart feel like? What did your breathing feel like? What did your skin feel like? What did what did your muscles feel like? And it is just helpful, and I think it is especially helpful for our kids with ADHD and especially younger kids to have them start thinking about how anger or

other emotions, anxiety, stress, how those feel in their body, because especially for kids with ADHD and kids with anxiety too, a lot of times it just seems like they go from fine to exploding and there’s no middle ground. And what we’re really wanting to help them get better at, which and it gets better as they get older too, but what we want them to get better at is identifying that feeling when it first starts so that then they can do some of these techniques we’re going to talk about next. But

before they can do those techniques, they a lot of times have to recognize how that’s feeling in their body. So this can be really helpful to draw a picture and they can put where anxiety lives in their body or sadness or happiness or all kinds of emotions you can do that with. And this one at first may seem a little bit surprising, but I love naming anxiety. And I did not come up with this on my own. There’s another book I really like.

And I have some resources at the end for you, but there’s this What to Do When You Worry Too Much workbook that’s for like elementary age kids. It’s by Dr. Don Hubner. She goes through principles from cognitive behavioral therapy, which we’ll talk about here in a minute. But she has that in her book. I know other people do that too, where kids can name their anxiety and even draw what it looks like. And I think this is so smart. And there’s a few reasons why this works. Number one, it gives you a way to talk about this besides just saying my.

Anxiety. It’s more fun if you can name it something, and even more fun if it’s a funny name or the your child draws their anxiety and it looks like a furry monster or something. I’ve seen one example where a kid who was really worried about germs, his his anxiety was named germworm, and it makes it easier to talk about, right? Because then if that kid is asking again and again, is this food gonna make me sick? Are you sure it won’t make me sick? The mom can say, or dad can say, I think.

that’s germ worm talking. I I think he can he can take the back seat right now or just gives you another way to talk about it.

Again, anytime we can use humor, that’s great. So the sillier name or the sillier the anxiety looks, the better. And the other thing this really does is it separates the anxiety. This little furry monster is not me. He’s separate from me. And so that helps kids to be able to get some distance from the anxiety and make it seem a little bit smaller. And

The an another thing I really like to talk to kids and teenagers about is that we have a lot more control over our worry thoughts than we think we do. I tell them I was like 40 years old before I realized that I can control a lot of what I think about. And that if I have some worry thought that’s taking up a lot of space in my brain, I can actually kind of talk back to it or do things that help that thought not to be as big and not be taking over my brain so much. And I say, isn’t it great? You can learn about this.

When you’re eight or twelve, instead of having to wait till you’re forty like I was. And most of these techniques.

are going to be working at getting ourselves and our kid back into the present moment because anxiety is usually not really living in the present moment. It’s a lot of times forward thinking like what if there’s a tornado? What if there’s a car accident? What if the teacher calls on me and I don’t know the answer? All of these kind of what if future things. And then sometimes it’s past looking too, right? my gosh, I think everyone thinks I’m stupid because I said that or I think that friend is is

doesn’t like me anymore because of what happened at school today. So when we can get someone back into this present moment and into what their body feels like, that can be really helpful. And again, using this brain model, if someone is really upset and they’ve flipped their lid and they don’t have their thinking part of the brain working, they’re all in this emotional brain, we want them to get this thinking part back online. So movement can help. This is like when my dad was walking me back and forth in that first grade hallway.

Just that movement can really help. Getting outside, getting a change of scenery can be really helpful. And then there’s also this really cool concept that makes good intuitive sense to us that’s called dyadic co-regulation. And I’m going to read the definition because I just like it so much that what dyadic co-regulation is, is it’s this bi-directional moment-to-moment process where two people jointly manage, modulate, and synchronize their emotions.

emotional, behavioral, and physiologic states. So we can all think of times that we’ve done that. Basically it means we influence our kids and our kids influence us. And just like you can think of times when you walked into a room and someone was really uptight or really angry or upset and that emotion just kind of radiated off of them onto you. You can also think of times when or a friend or someone you really like that just has this really calm, warm, comforting presence

And you just tend to kind of relax and feel really good when you’re around that person. And that’s the same thing we’re continually doing with our kids, right? And sometimes, especially when kids are having really intense emotions, we can intentionally use this co-regulation.

And so this is the good stuff now. some of these are gonna be familiar to you, but I think talking through them is really helpful and you may find a different way to use it or a different one than than what you’ve tried before. I talk a lot with kids, especially teens, about regulating the stress response. Sometimes they don’t want to hear about anxiety and it can feel a little more neutral to talk about, yeah, we all have stress and our bodies respond to stress in predictable ways. And isn’t it cool that there are things we can do to

control that. So the first is belly breathing. the other thing I should say is of course a lot of times kids will tell me, yeah, I tried breathing once, it didn’t work. And

Number one, they probably tried it when they were already upset, right? And it’s not gonna work as well when they’re already in this amped up state and they’ve already flipped their lid. But I tell kids, yeah, you probably weren’t very good at soccer when you first started it. You probably couldn’t play the piano the very first time you sat down. What what got what got you better at those things is you practice, right? And you practice a little bit every day. And even though it sounds weird, it’s the same with breathing. The more you can practice these slow deep breaths at times when you’re calm,

The better it will work for you when you use it at other times. And I tell kids the cool thing about breathing is it’s just breathing. Nobody knows that you’re doing it. So you can do this belly breathing when you’re at school, you can do it on the soccer field, you can do it all different places, but it really works the best. If you practice it every day, build it into your nighttime routine, it can help with good quality sleep and falling asleep. But also if your body associates it with times when you’re calm, like before sleep, then it’s going to

Work so much better when you are doing it other times when you’re feeling kind of stressed or upset. So with belly breathing, it’s really great, especially for little kids, if they put a stuffed animal on their belly. So if they’re laying in bed or on the couch or somewhere and they’ve got a stuffed animal on their tummy, then what they can do is watch that stuffed animal kind of go up and down as they’re breathing. And when we’re stressed and not super relaxed, we breathe up here in our chest, right? And so we’re wanting.

kids to be able to do that slow deep belly breathing. I always think of little babies because you all might remember from when your kids were small, you can just watch their little tummies going up and down a lot of times when they’re really relaxed.

Another breathing technique I really like is cookie breathing. And this one works for a couple of reasons. One is it’s still this deep breathing, so we’ve got that going on. But the other really cool thing about this one is it’s getting a child out of their own head, out of their worry thoughts, and into something that they probably like better because we all like cookies, right? And so with this, you can tell your child, you might even have them close their eyes, and you can say, okay, let’s imagine you just took a cookie.

out of the oven. I want you to really picture what that cookie is. What type of cookie is it? it’s chocolate chip? Okay. And now I want you to think about what that cookie smells like. And you’re gonna do a big breath in and smell that cookie. and that cookie is so hot though. So we’re gonna need to blow on that cookie before you can eat it. It is too hot to eat. And so then you’re gonna guide them through

slowly breathing out. and so again they’re they’re breathing in and they’re smelling the cookie and then they’re breathing out and blowing on the cookie and you’re getting them to imagine with you something that’s more fun than whatever just got them all amped up.

And then the other one that that I’m sure some of you have heard of is 54321. And it’s always hard for me to remember which which sense goes with which number, but honestly, it doesn’t matter. And you could do a variation of it where it’s two things you see and two things you hear and two things you feel or or however you want to do it. But basically you’re just trying to get that kid to get still and really think about.

what they can what they can hear and see and feel and smell and taste. And again, you’re getting them back into that present moment and out of those worry thoughts.

There are some really good stuff online. I love the Meg Foundation. I the volunteer board chair for that group. It’s a great website. It’s Meg Foundation for Pain.org. I have them linked at the end of this in my resources section. But basically what what we do as an organization is we provide a lot of free science backed resources that help with mostly procedural pain and anxiety, so needle sticks, that kind of thing. But also we have some chronic pain stuff, especially

related to headaches. And so they have a good video called Breathing for Comfort with with Super Meg. So you can check that out. There are other good ones online too.

And especially for my older kids, a lot of times I will explain the science of breathing with them. Because again, they’re gonna say, I tried breathing, it doesn’t work, it’s all woo-woo, you’re just saying something that that you think is is gonna help, but it doesn’t really help me. And so a lot of times we’ll talk about how it’s actually a hack of your nervous system. And so I’ll talk to kids about how you’ve got your vagal nerve and it goes down the side of your neck on both sides, and your bagal nerve

Is responsible for activating your parasympathetic nervous system. And you may have heard of your sympathetic nervous system, which is your fight or flight. Sympathetic is a tiger’s chasing me. I gotta run, my heart rate has to go up, I’m really stressed. And your vagal nerve is for your parasympathetic nervous system. That’s the opposite of fight or flight. That’s the rest and digest. And so what’s really cool when you take deep breaths is that you are signaling to your brain and your body that things are okay. You’re getting

out of that emergency part of your brain and back into the calm thinking part of your brain. And again, the plug for it’s much more helpful if you do it every day, practice it regularly, at times you’re not stressed, then it works a whole lot better when you try to do it when you’re starting to feel stressed. And so sometimes explaining it in that way and kind of the science behind it gets more buy-in from our our teens.

And here’s another really cool thing. I know you have probably tried to get your kids to do things just like I have and they haven’t wanted to do them. And you may suggest breathing and your kid may say, I am not taking deep breaths with you. And that’s okay because number one, at that point you probably need to take some deep breaths. Remember the whole dyadic co-regulation. And so we can model for our kids, right? We can say, you know what, I’m starting to feel a little stressed.

I am gonna take two slow deep breaths because that will make me feel better. And then you may even say, I wonder, do you know what happens in your body when you take deep breaths? Do you know what actually happens? Maybe you’d be interested. I don’t know though. And so then sometimes you’ll they’ll get a little curious and and want to know, and you can talk about it it signals to your brain and body that you’re okay. It takes you out of that emergency part of your brain. It gets the speak thinking part back to working.

Another thing is you can say something like, Man, it is so cool. Did you know that whenever I need to feel more calm, I can just take a couple deep breaths and then I feel calmer. I don’t know, it might work for you. Maybe you’ll try it sometime. So there are ways to model this for our kids. And worst case scenario, they don’t want to do it themselves, but we are calmer and then we are able to influence them or approach the situation with them better.

So a little bit more now. I know we have a few minutes left. So a little bit more on what I do as a pediatrician who treats a lot of anxiety and a lot of ADHD. number one is a SCARED assessment. This is a standardized, freely available assessment tool for anxiety. It is validated for kids as young as age eight, and you can find it online.

It is there’s a parent version and a child version. And so I will use this when I’m th trying to assess how much anxiety I’m seeing. it also breaks it down into those different anxiety flavors we talked about, like generalized anxiety, school avoidance, separation anxiety, those kinds of things. So that’s the first thing I’m gonna do is

kind of get the lay of the land for how how much anxiety and what type of anxiety. Again, that question about how is it getting in the way of things that kids either need to do or want to do. And

in our kids with ADHD, we’re gonna look and we’ll talk about this more in a second, but thinking about like how much of this is ADHD, how much of this is anxiety, is there anything else that could be going on, like a learning disability? So really kind of broadly looking at the whole picture to help

assess what’s causing these symptoms because kids can have symptoms and it could look the same. A kid may be having a hard time paying attention in school and that could be ADHD, that could be anxiety, that could be something else. So really trying to think about what what is causing these symptoms. I’m going to do a lot of education about the brain and about anxiety. Talk a lot and and find out a lot about that child’s sleeping habits and their nutrition and exercise and those kinds of things. And then

anytime I can with all of my my patients, I’m going to recommend that they work on some cognitive behavioral techniques with a mental health therapist and sometimes medications.

And the thing I want everyone to know is anxiety is really, really treatable. Like we talked about at the beginning, it’s really common. And when kids have ADHD, a lot of times they also have anxiety. But the good news is there are really, really great treatments. And so if I could choose between medication or cognitive behavioral therapy, I’m gonna choose the therapy every single time because I want kids to have those skills and to be able to work through those situations. And so cognitive behavioral therapy.

therapy is really working on changing how a child is thinking about those things that are stressful or fearful and making him fearful. And then in a supportive way being able to work through those situations and do those things that they need to do and want to do without having to avoid.

And then a lot of relaxation strategies, self-regulation strategies like we were just talking about. And we all have these ants or automatic negative thoughts that are going through our head. And so working with a good therapist can really help with identifying those ants and replacing them with more helpful thoughts.

I also really feel like people should know that SSRI medications are indicated for kids as young as six years old and have really good evidence behind them for treating anxiety disorders. And I always tell kids if we’re talking about a medication, I never start you on a medication with the thought that okay, you’re gonna be on this for the rest of your life. The good news is most of the time we can use these med we can use this medicine for a period of time, six to twelve months, sometimes a little long.

And especially if a child has been working on skill building with a therapist, then a lot of times that child can successfully come off of that medication. And this data that I’m showing at the bottom of the slide is from the CAMS study, which was a really well-done multi-site study that looked at treating anxiety in kids with SSRI medications, cognitive behavioral therapy, or both. And what it found was that.

doing a combo of those two things in in 12 weeks. So that’s the other thing I think it’s important to know is we’re not talking about, you know

many, many months to years of therapy. We’re talking about 12 weeks. 80% of kids had a positive response and sixty-five percent of those kids had minimal or no anxiety symptoms after 12 weeks. So significantly reducing that anxiety in those kiddos. And even without medication, with cognitive behavioral therapy alone, 60% of kids had a positive response. So really, really treatable.

And a lot of times this fear thermometer can be helpful too or an anxiety scale. And I’ll I’ll do a lot of talking with kids about okay, if zero is no anxiety and 10 is the most anxious you could feel, that’s panic. How do different situations make you feel? Or where is your anxiety typically? And this is helpful in talking about the role of medications too, because if a child is always at a nine or a ten, they’re always feeling so panicked and so stressed, it’s gonna be really hard for them.

To use skills that they’re learning in therapy if they’re always so so stressed. And so in that case, it can be really good to start a medication while a child is also doing therapy. And the goal for the medication is to bring that anxiety down a few notches. So maybe from a nine or a 10, it brings it down to more like a six or a seven. And then that child has some bandwidth, some coping to be able to work on things in therapy.

And

Just my last couple minutes here, I’ll talk about specifically questions that I get a lot of times about ADHD and anxiety together. the first, just like I alluded to a few minutes ago, the symptoms overlap a lot, right? Anxiety and ADHD can look really similar. They’re kids that have a hard time sitting still, they’re fidgeting a lot, they have a hard time paying attention, they may have trouble sleeping, they may seem really rigid, like they can’t really tolerate a big range of things. So if something doesn’t go exactly how they want it,

It to go, that’s really hard for them. We see that both with anxiety and with ADHD. It can be hard to see other people’s perspectives sometimes. And then of course, these big meltdowns or kind of these big emotional outbursts, those can happen with both ADHD and anxiety. And I think it’s really helpful to get help from your pediatrician or your other trusted resource if you’re having a hard time knowing which is causing the most symptoms or if you’re just struggling.

Your child is struggling with both of those things because we can use tools like the Scarrot like the Vanderbilt assessment and just our clinical expertise to help tease out which one is the bigger player. And I think that’s important because the next question I get a lot is okay, if anxiety and ADHD are happening together, which one do we treat first if we’re going to do medications? And typically what what I do and what what most child psychiatrists

would recommend is we treat whichever one is causing the most problems. So it is not uncommon for someone to come to me for concerns with ADHD and they may really have ADHD, but I just have a sense that until that anxiety is better, we’re not going to make any progress with that ADHD part of things. So in that case, if we’re doing medication, we may start an SSRI first. On the other hand, if that ADHD is really the bigger player and yeah, they’re kind of anxious because they’re having such a hard time in school,

But really the ADHD is the main player, then it makes sense to treat the ADHD first with this stimulant medicine and see after we effectively treat that ADHD, how much anxiety we’re left with. Because we may not have much that we’re left with, or what we’re left with may work great for therapy. Or if we still have a significant amount of anxiety, then maybe it makes sense to start a second medication. And that brings me to my last point, which is, or the last question, is there a single medication that

Treats both anxiety and ADHD. And that is a common understandable question. And my answer isn’t very satisfying, probably, because it’s maybe but not always. Most child mental health and psychiatry experts that I listen to and have learned from will say that really.

Anxiety deserves an SSRI and ADHD deserves a stimulant medication. And there are some medications that can do an okay job sometimes of treating both, but unfortunately, a lot of times if we try to treat both with one medication that’s not either a stimulant or an SSRI, we may end up with kind of mediocre treatment with both. And I am really cognizant of never wanting to use more meds than we need, but

In a lot of cases, I think it would make sense to treat the main condition first with that first line medication. And then if we’re still having a lot of symptoms of that second condition, then you add in that second medication that is best at treating that second condition. And so that’s just kind of my framework and and what to tends to work best, but every child is gonna be a little bit different.

And I will include these in our in our presentation. I’ve mentioned a couple of them, What to Do When You Worry Too Much is this workbook that is great for elementary age kids. Outsmarting Worry is kind of the preteen and teen version of that book by Dr. Hubner. It’s really good too. These are all available on Amazon or other places that you get books. Anxiety Relief for Kids is a really good book by Dr. Frigget Flynn Bridget.

That’s written for adults to read to help their kids. And then I already plugged our Kansas City expert, Dr. Natasha Berger. Her book, Managing Childhood Anxiety for Dummies, is really comprehensive and really great. And there’s also a podcast some of you may have heard of. It’s called Fluster Clux. It is really good. It’s by a woman named Lynn Lyons. And then Shameless Plug for my own podcast called the ADHD Mond.

That I do with my co-host, my co-host, fellow pediatrician, Dr. Narissa Bauer. We have an episode where we had Natasha Bergert on to talk about her book. And we have another episode on of anxiety. And of course, we talk all about all things ADHD. And that is about.

It. Some great websites out there. I like childmind.org. I like mental health literacy. Healthychildren.org is really good. These are specifically for anxiety. This is a really good one from the Mental Health Literacy Foundation. Their website is great. They have other things. Big Five for Mental Health is great. That’s from them.

And then the Meg Foundation, which I talked a little bit about before. If you go to Meg Foundation and you search Imagine Action in the search button, you will find these recordings that were recorded by pain psychologist from Stanford, Dr. Jodie Thomas, and these are really, really good. So these are things that kids can listen to before bed or any time when they want to be less anxious or they want to feel calm during needle pokes or they want to feel more control of feel in the in control of their feelings.

So I recommend these to patients all the time. They’re really good. And I think that’s it. This is my contact info. And I will stop sharing my screen. And I am happy to stick around if anyone has questions. So let me stop sharing here. And there we go.

yeah, perfect. Resources in the comments. Yes. Thank you for doing that, Kristen.

Feel free to pop on. And if you have any questions, you can just shout them out, raise your hand. I think there’s even a hand raise or put them in the chat. It was a great presentation. I loved so many things. I could like go on and on about all the different things that just resonated about the anxiety and the ADHD. And I I was really thinking about something that really struck me is when we’re talking about that co-regulation for anxiety, it really reminded me of body doubling.

That people that we do with ADHD, so that it is, it’s like, I, you know, and that actually works very well, like with the anxiety too. If you’ve got so, you know, that’s why everybody likes to go in with a friend, or sometimes if somebody else is doing it, or you can see what the other person is doing, or you can model it. Like that helps with both the anxiety and the ADHD. So I was like, wow, that’s amazing. Thanks, thanks to make that connection.

Yeah, yeah, you’re right. It it definitely fits really nicely with body doubling, for sure. Yeah.

Anyone else have some questions?

my son’s 11, ADHD, autism, anxiety, depression. we actually found his eight first ADHD med spiked his anxiety when he was about eight, and we’ve never

We’ve changed medications and went from a pediatrician to a child psychiatrist, but we’ve never been able to quite bring it back down again. but

the therapist, the you know, all his entire care staff, right? It’s that we’re waiting for the brain to to develop and we’re waiting for the brain to get older. And like we’re just some of the meds were just drop by in time. We’ve tried several SSRIs. he his ticks get get way worse within 48 hours. So we have to stop them. so like we’ve we’re like whittling down like where there was hope, and then you’re just like, Nope, nope, nope. So

Do you find that with anxiety I’m an anxious person. He comes by all this, honestly. But like, do you find when it’s kind of linked to maybe other things, the brain development over time does help or the anxiety of not treated successfully just the brain development doesn’t really help with that?

I think brain development does definitely help. It’s it’s so of course everybody is is so different, so it’s hard to to give a one size fits all answer. But I think I think absolutely that brain development helps. I think working with with a mental health therapist, which you’re probably already doing, I I think really helps too. it is it is not uncommon that

If someone tried a stimulant and their anxiety spiked that at a later date and a different stimulant when conditions are different, sometimes we can retrial the stimulant.

We know, you know, even with ADHD alone that brain development is several years behind peers a lot of times. and so that’s what’s so hard is every kid is is different. But I I think we do we do see emotional maturation and improvement with anxiety a a lot of a lot of times.

Looks like we have a lot of thank yous, a lot of great presentations, which I will second all of those kinds of things. I will say too, I’m giving this presentation to a number of teachers. And it really makes me happy that a lot of people in our school systems right now are hungry for this education and are really recognizing

It’s importance and so that just makes me feel really hopeful that I think so many adults in our kids’ lives right now are just wanting to do everything they can to help and are recognizing that all across the spectrum, no matter where kids are shaking out, they are wanting to learn more about anxiety and how brains work, so that they can help the kids in their lives.

Fantastic. Yeah. I suppose if there’s no more questions, then we will remind everyone to please go to adhdkc.org, but that’s got all the events. so if you want to keep up, I know we’ve got parent events, I think scheduled all the way through most of the rest of this year already.

As well as women’s group. We have a women’s group. We have a general group. We have a teen group. Like there’s so many opportunities to be part of this community. so please hop on over there. There is the new book club as well. so there’s kind of something for everybody. And if there’s not, we can often create something. So sneak up and we hope to see everybody continue to be on this and join us and be part of this great community.

Anything else you want to add, Kristen? I think you covered it all. Thank you. So all right. Get everybody off and bedtime routines for the kiddos and dinner for those of you who haven’t eaten yet or whatever you need to do. Yeah. Yeah. All right. Thank you. Thanks, guys. Bye. Bye.

If you’re parenting a child with ADHD, chances are you’ve heard those words before.

Maybe you’ve also wondered:

• Why can my child focus on sports stats, video games, or favorite hobbies for hours…

• But homework feels impossible?

• Why does school seem so painful for kids who are clearly intelligent?

• Is this really about motivation—or is something deeper going on?

In our newest episode of ADHDKC Conversations, Dr. Kristen Stuppy and Dr. Caroline Danda sit down with Adam Tilove—certified executive coach, author, former Head of School, and new ADHDKC board member—to unpack these questions.

🧠 In This Episode:

Adam shares:

✔️ What 11 years leading schools taught him about ADHD students
✔️ Why traditional school environments often fail bright ADHD kids
✔️ His own journey of being diagnosed later in life
✔️ The “Smart Kid Paradox” and how intelligence can sometimes mask deeper struggles
✔️ Why execution—not motivation—is often the real challenge
✔️ Practical insights parents can use immediately

📚 About Adam Tilove

Adam is the creator of the NeuroDiscipline framework, designed to help bridge the frustrating gap between knowing what to do and actually doing it.

He is also the author of Split Second: Stop Stalling. Start Doing.

His work focuses on helping ADHD individuals and families better understand the mechanics behind procrastination, follow-through, and success.

🎧 Podcast Highlights

“School is often not designed for how ADHD brains actually work.”

“The world eventually stops caring how smart you are and starts caring what you can execute.”

“This isn’t a motivation problem—it’s a mechanics problem.”

📅 Don’t Miss Adam’s Upcoming ADHDKC Parent Group Event

The Smart Kid Paradox: Why School Is Painful for Kids With ADHD — and What Parents Can Do About It

📍 Online
📅 Tuesday, July 14th
⏰ 6:30 PM CT
💻 Free with RSVP

Adam will also provide:

🎁 A free practical parent resource guide
🎁 Actionable takeaways you can implement immediately
🎁 Additional tools from his NeuroDiscipline framework

LEARN MORE AND RSVP

🔗 Resources

Watch the video above or listen to the full episode

on your favorite podcast player - look for ADHD KC Conversations

RSVP for the July 14th Parent Group Event:

RSVP

Adam Tilove’s Website:

Neurodiscipline

Adam’s LinkedIn:

LinkedIn

Find this and other recordings on the ADHDKC Website:

Recorded Events

💬 Final Takeaway

If your child is bright but struggling, frustrated, or constantly labeled as “not reaching potential,” this episode is essential listening.

Understanding why ADHD kids struggle in school can change how parents support them—and how kids see themselves.

🎙️ Listen now, share with another parent, and join us July 14th for this powerful conversation.

ADHDKC Conversations
Real experiences. Expert insights. Practical ADHD strategies.

Chapters

00:00 Introduction to ADHDKC Conversations

01:34 Understanding ADHD Through Personal Experience

05:39 The Role of Environment in ADHD Success

09:26 Misdiagnosis and the Complexity of ADHD

14:29 The Impact of Late Diagnosis

17:35 Supporting ADHD Kids: Parental Perspectives

18:56 The Smart Kid Paradox

21:21 The Importance of Homework and Execution

25:57 Building Structures for ADHD Success

30:02 Split Seconds: The Book and Its Insights

32:24 Preview of Upcoming Talk: The Smart Kid Paradox

Join Us for the First Quarterly ADHDKC Book Club Discussion

• Online Weekly Forum June 4- August 6th - join our group here

• Live Zoom Discussion Thursday, August 6th at 7:00 PM (Online) - sign up here

The ADHDKC Book Club is designed to help our community read together, learn together, and share what actually works in real life.

This is more than just a book club—it’s an ongoing space for building foundational knowledge about ADHD through trusted resources, meaningful discussion, and shared lived experience.

We’ll focus on books that explore:

• ADHD science and neuroscience

• Practical strategies

• Parenting tools

• Emotional regulation

• Real-life application

• Personal growth across the lifespan

Our goal is simple: To better understand our children, ourselves, and ADHD—so we can feel more informed, empowered, and confident.

Whether you’re brand new to ADHD or years into your journey, there is always more to learn—and we often learn best from combining evidence-based information with the wisdom of others who truly understand.

How the ADHDKC Book Club Works

📖 One Book at a Time

We’ll read one carefully selected book each quarter.

🗓 Weekly Reading Schedule

Books are broken down into manageable weekly chapters to make participation more ADHD-friendly and realistic.

💬 Ongoing Online Discussion

Each week, new discussion questions will be posted in our ADHDKC online community forum to encourage reflection, conversation, and practical application as you read. Join our online forum/community discussions on adhdkc.org/groups.

Request to join the Book Club Group if you’re not a member - it’s free, hosted on our website, and works like Facebook without the Meta concerns.

Join our Group

🎥 Quarterly Live Online Meeting

Every quarter, we’ll gather online for a live book discussion to bring together what we’ve learned and share insights as a community.

I want to join on zoom

Flexible Participation

Life gets busy, and ADHD can make consistency challenging. That’s why you can:

• Read weekly

• Read ahead

• Catch up later

• Join discussions anytime

• Participate even if you don’t finish every chapter

There’s no wrong way to participate.

The goal is progress, not perfection.

Our First Book Selection:

ADHD 2.0: New Science and Essential Strategies for Thriving with Distraction--from Childhood through Adulthood by Edward M. Hallowell M.D. and John J. Ratey M.D.

ADHD 2.0 is a modern, strengths-based look at ADHD that explores updated neuroscience, practical tools, and actionable strategies.

🎥 Live Online Discussion

Thursday, August 6 at 7:00 PM

I'll be there!

Come ready to:

• Discuss key takeaways

• Share insights

• Ask questions

• Learn from others

• Explore real-world application

Can’t Make the Live Meeting?

We still encourage you to join the forum discussions if:

• You’re interested

• Your schedule conflicts

• You’d like future participation opportunities

Please join the online community and share what days/times may work better for you.

Future meeting dates will be shaped by participant interest and availability, so your feedback matters.

Meet Your ADHDKC Book Club Co-Coordinators

Caroline Danda, PhD

Caroline Danda may already be familiar to many ADHDKC families through prior Parent Group presentations. She now also serves as ADHDKC’s Parent Group Coordinator and newest co-host of ADHDKC Conversations. Caroline brings valuable expertise, practical support, and a deep commitment to helping families better understand ADHD.

Tish Taylor, PhD

Tish Taylor is a respected ADHDKC Parent Group presenter, author of Parenting ADHD with Wisdom and Grace (2019), and co-author of Taking Sides: Controversial Issues in Classroom Management (2005). Tish offers compassionate, research-informed guidance for parents navigating ADHD.

Together, Caroline and Tish bring knowledge, warmth, and lived experience to create an engaging, supportive learning community.

Why Join ADHDKC Book Club?

✔ ADHD-friendly structure

✔ Weekly manageable reading (with a catch-up week because life happens)

✔ Practical discussion

✔ Expert-informed resources

✔ Supportive community

✔ Ongoing learning between events

Grab the book. Join the conversation. Learn alongside people who truly get it.

Because learning about ADHD is easier—and more powerful—when we do it together.

Ready to Join?

Register today, grab your copy of ADHD 2.0, and become part of this exciting new chapter for ADHDKC.

Join Us on Zoom