First things first, I am not dying. I am healthy, 43, and a mother of three, happily married, so I am fine. But since I went on this healing journey in 2015, I have changed a lot.

My mind has changed, my patterns have changed, my whole character works differently, and I have created a life worth living, away from the 9–5 grind, next to a beautiful beach. To live in Australia, near the ocean, was one of my biggest dreams. I grew up in Europe, mostly in Germany, and then for about six years in Austria, and these days I do like to ask myself uncomfortable questions.

Since I experienced my spirit outside of my body and thought I was dying, I have made my peace with death and what comes after, but I am also aware that I need to prepare for this next step on my path.

Death is inevitable, and death will come for all of us sooner or later.

If we are lucky, and if the universe allows it, we may have a long journey ahead of us and live to a very old age.

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These days, this is about 80–100 years old, but we also have more centenarians than ever. About 722,000 people are aged 100 or older worldwide in 2024. Amazing trend!

Quick side note:

I also just want to mention that in the next 5–10 years, maybe even quicker, we might have a cure for aging. We all might look like we are 21 in about a decade and only die from stupid accidents and such, but no one will have to die because of everything that comes with aging. Exciting times ahead. But anyway.

We know we will all die, but we like to forget about this fact during our years alive. I don’t believe this is a very balanced way of choosing to live.

I think it is important to be aware of your mortality every day you live.

Why? Because you become more grateful for every day, for every minute you are allowed to have this mind-bending experience we call Earth life.

I often ask myself: if I were on my deathbed today, would I regret a lot? What would be my thoughts? What would be your thoughts?

Typical questions might be:

• What have I done with my life?

• I regret not doing XY. Why didn’t I go for it? Why didn’t I have the courage to do it?

• Why did I live a life for others? Why couldn’t I choose myself?

• Do I love myself unconditionally?

• Do I believe I did what I came here to do in this life?

• Can I die without bearing secrets?

• Did I love deeply enough?

• Did I do good in this life?

• Did I spend enough time with my loved ones?

• Why did I spend so much time worrying about what others have to say about me?

• Did I waste too much of my energy on things that actually don’t matter much?

• Is there anyone I should have forgiven or even asked for forgiveness?

• Did my life make a difference to anyone?

• Why didn’t I realise what is important in life and what isn’t?

• Could I have avoided getting sick so soon?

• Why couldn’t I create a balanced body, a balanced mind, a balanced spirit?

• Will I go to heaven or to hell, and do they even exist? (For religious people.)

• Why was I driven so much by fear?

• Why couldn’t I let go of my anger?

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Maybe if we don’t wait until it is too late and acknowledge death as part of the game of life, and ask ourselves these questions earlier on in life, we can live with more authenticity, love, gratefulness, and higher life-force energy.

Maybe death is not the enemy, but we are our own enemy.

Humans like to push their problems away, and it is easy to do these days because living in Western society means being distracted most of the time anyway, unless you actively work against it.

So, let’s ask ourselves these questions every day, or at least once a week or once a month!

Let’s embrace our mortality.

Let’s find ourselves, our inner child, our higher self, and connect to Source again.

Why? Because when we are connected to Source and experience our spirit outside of the human body vehicle during our lifetime, we experience what we are. For most Westerners, these things might remain in the fantasy or science fiction world, but for a few who want to know, paths will open up; possibilities and opportunities will come up.

Hopefully, more and more are going down this path of awakening, even though it is probably the hardest and most challenging path that you can choose.

The beginning of this journey might be painful and seemingly unachievable, but only after a few years, a decade, or whatever it might take, life will become more magical than ever.

You will start to feel the magic living inside of you, and skills will come back to you. Skills that we were all made to believe don’t exist in real life.

We are powerful spirits, currently experiencing life on Earth, but our power still lives in us if we are ready to see beyond everything that was programmed and brainwashed into our minds.

Believe in yourself! Believe in magic again!

Don’t fear death, but fear a life of stagnation. Death is just another door.

You’ve got this!

Hugs, Alina

Connect with me: LinkTree

Have you ever questioned the life you were living? Have you ever not liked yourself or who you have become?

I have been there. It is not a great spot to be in, but fortunately, nothing is forever, and with a clear intention, we can achieve and create anything, even a completely new character in a renewed human body.

When you finally break free from everything that doesn’t serve you, it is a fantastic feeling. Life can feel magical. Life can be yours again. You can live on your own terms, with authenticity.

But getting to where I am today was not an easy ride. I’ve been so broke at times that I thought I wouldn’t make it in this reality.

But let’s break down what was part of my breaking-free journey and how everything started.

My Breaking Free Journey

1. Opening Up

When I was around 15 years old, I opened up for the first time about my trauma and challenges at home to a school friend, and from then on, I was on a healing journey.

Before I had this one conversation, I wasn’t even aware that my upbringing wasn’t as it was supposed to be.

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To give you a bit of a background story, I grew up with a mother who struggled mentally a lot. Alcohol was also part of the evil game that I was forced to play. From a very young age, I was raised a people pleaser, or better said, a mother pleaser. My mother has good sides, but unfortunately, she made a lot of bad decisions in her life. My dad? He wasn’t often at home, maybe about 2–3 days a month. My parents fought a lot and didn’t have a very balanced or kind relationship; more the opposite.

When I was about 13, the divorce started. When I was about 14, my parents were divorced, but for the previous 7 years, they had been in a long-distance relationship anyway, so the divorce felt more freeing, especially for my mother, who had whole meltdowns just before his arrival.

But anyway, back to my breaking-free journey.

2. The Black Sheep

I decided to study. I was the first one in my family. My family was a very proud working-class family, and weirdly enough, most of my family members were not happy with me wanting to go to university, but I saw an opportunity to do things differently, and knowledge is power, so it made sense to me to walk a different path.

I quickly became the black sheep of my family because I was so different.

3. Therapy

In my early 20s, a friend gave me the advice to seek help from a therapist, so I did. I only had a handful of sessions, but this helped me a lot on my journey.

I had just scratched the surface, but it slowly dawned on me that I was not a bad person (like my mother would say), and I also learned from my therapist that I am not responsible for somebody else’s happiness and that everyone is responsible for their own happiness.

I started to analyze my behavior more and more and became aware that I was not the best listener or communicator. With the intention to become a better listener and a better communicator, I decided to become a mediator and started the course in addition to my main study direction — environmental system sciences with a major in economics.

My time on campus was great. I found myself piece by piece, but I still had a long journey ahead of me to become the version of myself that I am today.

4. Be The Good Girl

I graduated with honors and started working full-time.

Only about one year later, I was depressed. I felt crushed by this reality. Is this now my life? Work 9–5, live for the weekends, and only be allowed to enjoy about 5 weeks of vacation a year?

My boss offered me a new and improved position, with more responsibility, but I couldn’t do it. I don’t know what was happening, and there I was, sitting in this café, eating my lunch, calling my best friend at the time and telling her that my boss and I had just cancelled my contract.

I was crying crocodile tears in the middle of this café. Luckily, I was tucked away in a corner, and there were barely any people on this day.

5. Starting Over

I moved to the capital city in Austria, Vienna, and found myself doing a lot of a variety of student jobs (mostly handing out flyers, etc.) until I found myself working in my dream job, at least I thought so back then.

I worked in the media sector for 5 years, and it was fun in the beginning, but after about 2.5 years, I became depressed again.

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Hiding behind a smile, nobody noticed, but it got worse and worse.

6. Finding My Inner Voice

I found my way to yoga and meditation. I went through yoga vacations where I had to get up at 5 p.m. during my life as an employee.

My work colleagues called me insane.

Why would you choose to wake up that early and follow a strict schedule on your vacation? Why wouldn’t you want to sleep in and book an all-inclusive holiday?

These yoga vacations were the answer for my scattered and depressed mind. Finally, I had time to think, to meditate, to hear my inner voice again, and my inner voice was very clear. I have to quit my 9–5. This ain’t life!

I still needed another 2.5 years to finally quit my job and, with that, all the security to pay my bills.

7. Expanding My Consciousness

In my early 30s, I met Travis, my husband and best friend these days.

Together, we embarked on a challenging journey into the depths of our minds.

We took part in ancient healing rituals with ancient medicine. I was mind-blown, literally. I connected with my higher self more and more. I started to have a daily meditation practice, and we went to Thailand to do our 300-hour yoga teacher training course.

Travis and I organized yoga retreats in the Alps for some time and gave yoga and meditation classes.

8. Goodbye 9–5

We travelled a lot, moved a lot, even between countries, and this went on and on for about 7 years.

In these 7 years, we started to combine our meditation practice once or twice a year for a couple of weeks with microdosing psilocybin or blue lotus tea. This enhanced our meditation practice.

During these 7 years, we both tried 9–5 jobs again, but it felt too soul-crushing at this point after our awakening.

It was not possible to work 9–5 anymore, so we had to find new ways, and we did, but it took a while.

Sometimes we didn’t have enough money for groceries, so we ate noodles and veggies or rice almost every day for a couple of weeks.

But the universe always had our back. When we thought we couldn’t pay our rent, we suddenly got another yoga client, and like this, we survived, step by step.

When you take the leap of faith, the universe will reward you!

9. Protecting My Energy

I started to value my own energy and life force more than ever and broke off contact with so-called friends who only wanted to be entertained or motivated by me.

Today, I am sure the old version of myself died somewhere along this journey. All the negative and low emotions that I felt all my life died as well during this transformational period.

I Had to Die Before I Could Truly Live
My Out-of-Body Experiencemedium.com

10. Becoming Myself

Today, I am a better version of myself, maybe not the best yet, but it is a work in progress.

I am a mother of three beautiful children. I started quite late with this, but I am happy that I didn’t become a mother in my 20s but in my late 30s and early 40s because before, I was a crushed soul with negative patterns, and I didn’t want to continue the toxicity that was in my family tree for probably centuries.

I had to break the chains and start anew.

I started questioning everything, and today I feel I broke free from a lot, but there is still room to grow.

The Future

My next step is to get an off-grid property, so I really don’t need the system around me at all anymore. I want to be in charge of my own food, my own water, but that is a whole new chapter of my life.

I have learned a lot from my mistakes, and I want to share my journey, so I have decided to start a podcast. The Breaking Free Podcast, where I walk you through 12 powerful steps in order to break free (available in my FB Group Breaking Free Tribe Members or on Substack).

Breaking free is definitely not an easy journey, and you will encounter a lot of naysayers, but for me, it was all worth it.

Today, I feel more like myself than ever, and I have learned to love myself unconditionally.

If you want to break free, all that you need for now is a clear intention. Everything else will come.

Trust the flow. :)

Hugs,
Alina

Connect with me: LinkTree

This is nothing new, but I feel like I, and probably many others, could use a reminder of this simple yet powerful principle.

The past is gone, so why relive it?

The future is unknown, so why worry about something that hasn’t happened yet?

But when we arrive in the here and now, we can be happy, content, magical, or whatever we want to be. It is all here, in this moment.

The magical, best version of ourselves doesn’t live in the past or the future. It is right here.

I want you to take three deep breaths. Make your exhale a little longer, and allow yourself to arrive fully in the here and now.

You are okay, and everything will be fine.

Remember who you are. Connect with your higher self.

Hugs,
Alina

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What are we doing?
Is this really what life is supposed to be?

Sometimes, we are only one thought, one idea, or one vision away from becoming the version of ourselves we have always wanted to be.

In Step 7 of Breaking Free, I guide you through creating your inner vision — without judgment, including judgment of yours…

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We have gotten a bit lost.

We cannot remember who we were before we came to this experience; we copy each other and get distracted all the time. Individualism isn’t necessarily seen as positive, and many organisations have found ways to benefit from our energy.

We are drained, lost, and confused.

But nothing is forever, and we fortunately have arrived in the era of awakening.

Birth is a magical event. We arrive in this reality naked, and this is exactly how we will leave this reality as well — naked.

Even though everybody knows this, we get brainwashed into needing more and more.

There is no end.

When we get the next better whatever, there is always a better one and a better one. It seems we all want to have more, at all times, but why?

Can we please all stop for a moment and question our whole life and existence? Why are we living every day the way we do?

Have we all watched too many ads? Can we still think for ourselves?

Nowadays, it feels like you need money to just breathe.

But what do we really need to be the best version of ourselves, happy (most of the time), or at least content with our lives?

When did life begin to feel so exhausting, painful, and draining?

Can life feel light, free, and magical still these days?
Yes, absolutely.

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But we need to open our eyes (all three) and feel what is right (for us) again.

What happened to the inner voice that once guided us?

Even if we were too distracted for decades, we can still choose to hear this voice again, today! Set your intention — there you go! :)

The key to a magical and free life is to detach from all materialistic stuff, even the stuff that has tremendous emotional value for us.

The truth is, our feelings live within us. Everything we attach them to is merely a projection.

When we find peace within ourselves, deal with the pain we have been carrying for so long, and decide to let go of materialistic things that carry emotional burdens, it can feel incredibly freeing in the weirdest way.

I went through this process a few times. I moved so often that I had to learn to let go of a lot of my belongings. I even went through a time when I embraced a minimalist lifestyle. I learned not to become attached to materialistic things, but it took me about 7 years to truly understand this.

Today, I am not a minimalist anymore, but I have learned my lessons. I value materialistic things for what they are, and I honour their purpose and the benefits that I might receive because of them.

But at the same time, you can take every materialistic possession away from me, and I wouldn’t be crushed.

As long as I have my kids, my husband, and myself, I have everything I truly need to be happy.

I will always find ways to create a safe and magical home for my family. Materialistic items can always be reorganized, rebuilt, or replaced.

But my loved ones are not replaceable. The experiences we have together and the magical moments we create together are the things I don’t want to miss in this life.

What we build inside ourselves, in our minds, can never be taken away.

Memories are forever with us.

For me, freedom is the realisation that you don’t need materialistic stuff to feel whole. True freedom comes from a peaceful and kind mind.

Maybe it is time to remember that we were whole before we ever owned anything.

Maybe it is time to return to the version of ourselves that was never interested in owning anything at all.

Maybe it is time to remember who we truly are.

Hugs,
Alina

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Yesterday, I watched Keep Breathing, a Netflix series, and it made me wonder about human nature, especially within the system of the 9-to-5 world.

Without spoiling too much, it is about a young woman whose plane crashes, leaving her alone on an island, where she is forced to face her own mind because there is no one else around.

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Is this what it takes for the average person in our Western society to finally face their inner demons? A plane crash??? Does it really have to go that far, or can we learn to face ourselves while we are still living our ordinary lives?

Many people choose not to look into their pain, their inner struggles, or the deep sadness that comes up as anger. And I get it. It is not a comfortable ride into the depths of your own mind. It can be very challenging. I know.

But at the same time, this is what we have to do if we want to feel free like a bird. Why? Because otherwise, we stay stuck.

We keep repeating the same patterns, carrying the same pain, reacting to the same triggers, and wondering why nothing changes.

You can’t expect a different life while repeating the same choices.

Stagnation is the real death, not death itself. Death is basically just a door into a different existence, but that is not the topic here.

The point is, we are alive now and being alive means we have the opportunity to grow and to look within, understand ourselves, process what happened to us, and choose what we want to do with it.

The universe has our back, but sometimes, when we avoid looking inside ourselves, the universe will find ways to make us look.

So why not get a head start?

Start today.

Start sitting in stillness with your own thoughts. Get to know yourself. Analyse yourself. Become aware of what triggers you and why. Find tools to accept yourself as you are, while at the same time choosing to improve every day, just by 1%; that is enough for a great result by the end of every year.

We are powerful, but not when we are hurting.

Our pain is real. Our past could have been better. Yes, absolutely.

But working on ourselves and processing what happened to us is the key to freedom — our freedom! We can create a magical existence on this planet, in this reality, but not without effort.

Don’t give up.

Keep working on yourself. Keep growing. Keep choosing yourself.

Keep shining your light.

Hugs,
Alina

Connect with me: LinkTree

Our society has taught us to hustle instead of live. It is very honourable to work 24/7, almost never sleep, and keep your vacations so tight that you might find yourself working during your vacation.

Society has taught us to measure our self-worth by how much we produce, but this is slowly but surely kill…

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There are two truths I’ve had to learn in life:

1. Don’t be a people pleaser.

2. Don’t take everything personally.

This was anything but easy for me. Growing up, I was forced into a people-pleaser role. My mother struggled mentally a lot, so I had to grow up very fast. I never saw harm in helping others, or my mother, but after …

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Growing up in an Austrian Roman Catholic household with all the traditions and beliefs connected to it, I felt that something was off at an early age, while I was still in kindergarten. It somehow simply didn’t feel right.

As a little kid, I used to be convinced that this reality was basically like the school system. E…

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Energy and vibration are part of everything around us. You might not always be able to see these forces, but they are always there, and when you become more finely tuned, you will feel these energies more and more.

The Universe has your back, but you also need to have your own back.

The Universe is just a mirror or a…

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This reality here on Earth is a tough school with challenging lessons, but this is why our souls are here: to grow, to develop, to experience Source and yourself at the same time, because both are intertwined and connected.

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In this episode, we talk about the seven chakras and the different layers of ourselves that can become blocked — our safety, our emotions, our power, our ability to love, ex…

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I used to be a great friend, and I also used to be a people pleaser. One of the kind that always felt the pressure to entertain and create a happy atmosphere for everyone, and that, of course, included catering to others and being there for all their needs and sorrow.

I was known to be the one with the good vibes, who a…

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I grew up in a traditional Austrian household, which meant that I had a 90% chance of being raised as a Catholic, and I was. In my class, we all claimed to have the same religion. There was just the one or other kid who was Protestant and not Roman Catholic.

There were no kids who didn’t claim to have a religion. This was …

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When your body is depleted, your mind is clouded, and your energy is running on empty, it's almost impossible to create the life you dream about.

In this episode, we talk about taking back your health, breaking free from burnout and hustle culture,…

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I post a lot of motivational and uplifting content, but even with my positive content, I get the one or other negative comment. People still like to complain about their lives a lot, even on these posts. Many still seem to be in a victim mindset and seem to see no way out.

Here is the thing. The universe always has your ba…

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This world might seem crazy, and I guess it is. You might have heard often that mental health matters, but we still don’t talk enough about how we can get out of the mindset that keeps us suffering. It is not so easy.

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Living in a system like ours makes it hard to see through all the misinformation and misinterpretation.

We tend to think that we need just a little bit more motivation, more discipline, a better idea, a better concept, and so on. All these things are not wrong, but when the human body and spirit are depleted, there is not…

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I fell into silence; everything around me turned into a 2D picture.

My spirit made its way out of the human suit.

7 layers had to be peeled away. I felt like an onion. It wasn’t painful, but it felt uncomfortable and warm in a weird way.

Then there was nothing. My name and my identity slipped away.
I became no one.

There was n…

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My doctors used to say that my uterus had an overgrowth of cysts and that it might be challenging to get pregnant. When I was 35, I made my peace with not having children, but after going through healing with the help of nature, something must have recovered naturally.

Today I am 43 and the proud mother of 3 gorg…

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