Before I explain, rewind to a cold November morning in 2024 where I sat down with a latte at Kin Cafe with the Ventureland Producer Miles Coleman. For background Ventureland are seen as one of the top documentary makers with awards coming out of their ears and Miles has had success on The Deepest Breath about free diving, If The Walls Could Talk about Abbey Road, and 99, about Manchester United’s Treble; Miles knows how to make documentaries that hit.

A cheesy pic from my Chelsea TV days when I got to know Mourinho well. I went on a trip to Ghana with him and spent a pre season with him in LA

We met up as part of his fact finding mission; he wanted to make sure he told the story right, and cared what I thought since I’d lived through so much of Mourinho’s career, and so it felt like a full circle moment that I was able to speak to him again two years later after the documentary had been released.

The first question I asked him:

How do you control the narrative of a man who has controlled the narrative for the last 20 years?

The answer, as you might expect is that you don’t. Imagine spending the best part of two 2 years with him to come to that conclusion. But the most interesting thing I found out is that Mourinho didn’t have editorial sign off, so although he gave the team access to archive and trophy rooms and let him into his home, ultimately they could make the doc they wanted to make and interview anyone they wanted to interview. Wow! How on earth do you get Mourinho to sign off on that?

Miles explains that the producer (also a huge Chelsea fan) John Battsek’s pitch was essentially:

Mourinho rates and respects victory, so Ventureland would have already won his trust by being the best. He could have gone with another company who gave him sign off, but that’s not a good documentary, you go with the best. At least Mourinho was sticking to type.

Now I’m less of a writer and more of a presenter or storyteller, so I would urge you to watch my interview with Miles in full here on my YouTube channel.

But I know you guys on Substack love to read, so I have tried to put my thoughts onto paper with the most revealing things that Miles told me.

One observation I found fascinating was when I asked Miles how he won José’s trust and respect. He explained to me how he tried. He told me that he has a Portuguese degree and, during filming, deliberately spoke Portuguese at dinner to get Mourinho’s attention. Mourinho noticed but said nothing. “He registered everything. I could see him bank it.”

Miles noted that when they had conversations, everything was about making him better. or showing what he wanted to show of himself, and a sudden realisation hit him that after two years of conversations José hadn’t asked a single question about Miles. That’s fascinating. I guess it makes sense. He saw the documentary as a ‘job‘ and wanted to get it done. Miles admits there were times that Mourinho didn’t seem to be enjoying it at all and if he’d suggested packing up and leaving Mourinho would have probably agreed.

So did Miles feel that he’d got to the crux of what Mourinho is all about? It reminded me of something I remembered José say back in 2017

“There’s something about me that you don’t know. And when I’m very, very old, I’m going to tell you all.”

Was that the revelation that he was to succeed Sir Alex Ferguson at Manchester United, or is there something else. I asked Miles:

That might seem that Ventureland haven’t done their job, but in fact, it’s the whole point. That is the crux of Mourinho, he controls the narrative, he controls what we know about him and he carefully chose one story to share, one story to keep us all hooked. He shared that story on the first filming session. Classic Jose.

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I’ve been presenting live TV for decades and have done thousands of hours on screen; breaking news, interviewing some of the most famous sportsmen of our generation and ticked all the boxes including hosting World Cups and reporting at Champions league finals. You might say I am ‘expert’ at my job, ten thousand hours and all that.

Technical errors occur all the time, and I always tell myself I will be better equipped the next time it happens, that’s experience, right? (I do have many, many stories of on-air fails, but that’s one for another day). Thankfully general nerves or anxiety hasn’t happened too much to me, and I usually find once the red light goes on and I utter my first words, all anxiety goes away, but I do have a fabulous tip that is the best I’ve heard in all my years.

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Not long after I’d had my first child I’d been asked to host an event for ESPN. I’d be live on stage with the boxer Anthony Joshua and Professor Steven Peters, a psychologist who has written many books including The Chimp paradox about that voice that tells you that you can’t do something. I’d be in front of a crowd of ad execs at Advertising week in London.

On stage at the event with Joshua and Professor Peters.

I had heard about new mums losing confidence and I was really afraid it would happen to me. It felt like an eternity since I’d presented something and this situation was outside of my comfort zone. I’d practiced hard, read all Joshua’s interviews, watched some of his fights but I was petrified. People kept telling me it would be like riding a bike, but I was not convinced.

As I was back stage waiting to go on, my mouth went dry. It reminded me of my early presenting days. All those years of experience and it felt like having a baby had pressed the reset button. I had a few minutes with Professor Peters who could see I was nervous and he said something to me as I walked out on stage.

Before I tell you what he said to me, for context Professor Peters specialises in how the human mind functions and helps individuals manage psychological health and peak performance. He’s worked with over 20 Olympic and national sports teams, including British Cycling, Liverpool FC, England Rugby, and GB Taekwondo as well as assisting numerous elite athletes such as Sir Chris Hoy, Victoria Pendleton, and Steven Gerrard. He has transformed the careers of so many, but is so incredibly humble.

He looked at me and knew exactly what to say, and it was so simple:

A simple, but powerful phrase. I wasn’t pretending anymore, I wasn’t proving anymore, this simply is what I do, it’s my job, why should I be afraid? I stood onstage and from somewhere I felt confidence. Even the laughing crowd settled me.

Those words Peters said to me are words I tell myself often. It’s become my mantra: “This is what you do!”

Maybe someone needed to hear this. Whatever you are are afraid of, just remember, this is what you do! I’m sorry if you were expecting something more transformational, I was too, to be honest! From a man who has written books and transformed careers. But it worked, and continues to be my mantra for peak performance, so I hope it can help you too.

This week Forbes released a list of the top 20 earning podcasters with Steven Barlett’s Diary of A CEO coming second with an estimated annual earning of $45 million.

He launched it in 2017 from his spare room using GarageBand and a sock for pop-shield and today it’s one of the biggest podcasts in the world and his media company employs over 150 people.

The 2^nd biggest podcast in the world, still asking people to hit subscribe.

It’s a little bit mind blowing but strangely reassuring because it’s one of the parts I hate most about having a podcast, telling people they need to keep coming back.

About six months ago I emailed DOAC’s trailer editor Anthony (who has just announced he’s leaving). Ballsy? Probably. But I genuinely think he’s changed the standard for podcast trailers and his attention to detail can be the difference between someone scrolling past or hitting subscribe.

He politely declined because he was too busy, but that rejection ended up leading me to another brilliant editor, someone who’d learnt a lot from Anthony’s style. That’s how creative industries evolve. Great work sets a new benchmark.

My episode with former England and Liverpool player Emile Heskey has had more than 4,000 views on a brand-new YouTube channel, yet only 255 people have subscribed. The clips are travelling much further than that, with many going viral because the stories are reaching people who need them. He told me stories of depression and anxiety, living in a hospital for months and telling no one.

So yes, I’ll continue asking you to subscribe at the end of every episode. It still feels a little uncomfortable. It still feels like selling. But if the second biggest podcaster in the world has to ask every single week, maybe the rest of us shouldn’t feel awkward about asking too. It isn’t begging, it’s simply building something

After The Final Whistle is a video podcast series about the real person behind the player. No small talk, no cliches, real conversations about real things. We cover topics such as depression, self harm, suicide, purpose, addiction. But it’s not as glum as it sounds, it’s full of positivity. I am a glass half full kind of a girl!

Oh and here are a few BTS pics

Me and Marvin Sordell. He survived a suicide attempt and has gone on to do some wonderful things since that day.

Danny Mills spoke to me about losing his son, but he was also able to talk about some of the funnier sides of his career post football.

BTS me with Emile Heskey as he spoke about his depression at Liverpool

Errr......so this is my podcast. Subscribe please......but only if you want to!!!

In April 2026 I launched After The Final Whistle; a video podcast series aimed at understanding the real person behind the footballer, and what happens to them when football stops. I liked the name as it covered the moments off the pitch whilst they were still playing as well as the more permanent ending, when they retired as a professional.

So many great players trusted me with telling their stories and we covered such difficult topics including grief, self-harm and suicide, and I had training from Samaritans to make sure I handled these conversations with care and sensitivity. You’ll hear a lot about ATFW on my Substack, so I want you to understand my motivation (and why it means so much to me).

So why did I decide to do it? The most simple answer is this: over my 20-plus years reporting in the Premier League I saw so many tender and private conversations with players that no fan was able to witness because it didn’t fit into a post-match analysis show or news programme and I just kept thinking; if only the fans could see what I see.

I did one interview in 2019 which left both me and the player almost in tears; you probably know the interview because it was repeated years later in 2025, in which Granit Xhaka spoke of his parents’ humble beginnings and the sacrifices they made while his dad was imprisoned. I had done that same interview 6 years before, but it never saw the light of day because my bosses had told me that although it was ‘very interesting’ it wouldn’t make the cut. This happened to me time and time again, and I kept thinking I had to do something, but that Xhaka interview was the final straw, the one that made me pull the trigger.

And so I started planning it. I managed to get Carlo Ancelotti, Brendan Rodgers and Granit Xhaka to take part, and I was so excited to get going. The first edition was called The Man Behind The Footballer. “Keep it simple,” I thought. I even had a production company, Whisper TV, backing it. They said they would pay for a pilot and then pay me as a presenter and producer for each episode after that. They loved the fact that I had a degree in psychology and were going to design it like a therapist’s office with a sofa; I couldn’t wait to get going.

If you take yourself back to 2019, people really weren’t asking players about personal things, not on TV anyway, there were plenty of deep dives in newspapers and online, but when the cameras started rolling it was rare to see interviews like this, so it felt quite unique at the time.

My employers Astro Malaysia had started allowing me to get more personal with the players on camera but the press officers really didn’t like it and I would often get a tap on the shoulder or would be told to remove a question completely. But I had to stick to my guns; this was what I wanted to do, this was my style, and I was constantly pushing the barriers of what I was allowed to do. I remember one interview with Jesse Lingard at Manchester United and the press officer Karen told me ‘none of your fun questions Alison’ as by that point I’d grown a bit of a reputation for it. But the players seemed to enjoy it more and that gave me confidence. I was ready to go.

Then the pandemic hit.

Whisper pulled my funding and I was told I had to do the interviews over Zoom. I couldn’t believe the timing; such bad luck.

But the idea stayed with me and I knew I would do it again one day. Cut to 2026; yes, life got in the way, but I did it.

After The Final Whistle is in the real world and I am so proud of it. You’ll hear a lot more about this series and what it has taught me, but for now, I wanted to explain why I did it, and I am so pleased I did, even though it took me a pandemic and a name change to finally get it into the world.

The funny thing is, when you've worked hard for something, it makes it all the more beautiful. So yes, I wish I'd launched it back in 2019, but in my head I did, and that's why it means so much to me today. If you're waiting for the right moment to start something that matters to you, maybe this is it.

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Lianne reflects on an incredible career that saw her win major honours with Arsenal, represent England on the international stage, and play football across the world in the USA, Spain, Italy and beyond.

We also discuss:
🔥 Becoming the first Lioness to publicly come out as gay
🔥 The financial realities of women’s football during her playing days
🔥 Life after football and building a career in punditry
🔥 Dealing with online abuse and criticism
🔥 Her love for football
A raw and emotional conversation about resilience, identity, football and finding purpose beyond playing.

If you enjoyed the episode, don’t forget to LIKE, COMMENT & SUBSCRIBE for more football conversations and exclusive interviews.

🎧 Available on Spotify & Apple Podcasts
📲 Follow us on socials for more clips and updates @afterthefinalwhistlepod

#LianneSanderson #Lionesses #WomensFootball #ManchesterUnited #FootballPodcast #AfterTheFinalWhistle #WomenInSport

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• Retiring from football at just 28

• His battle with depression and loneliness

• The reality of life inside professional football

• Identity, purpose, and life after the game

• His suicide attempt and the road to recovery

• Why mental health support in football must improve

This is an honest conversation about what really happens when the final whistle blows — and why the “dream life” of a footballer isn’t always what it seems. We also discuss masculinity, social media, therapy, and how to support friends who may be struggling. CHAPTERS 00:00 — Life After Football Isn’t What You Think Intro + themes: identity, time, and purpose 01:34 — Marvin Sordell: More Than a Footballer Meet the guest and his story 02:43 — “I Had to Retire at 28” Why he walked away early 05:15 — The Hidden Mental Health Toll of Football What the game really does to players 07:30 — Abuse, Racism & Pressure in Football The darker reality behind the scenes 10:04 — Misunderstood: “It Wasn’t Just Homesickness” How his struggles were dismissed 13:42 — What “Spiralling” Actually Feels Like Inside a mental health decline 18:11 — Rock Bottom: When It Got Too Much His lowest point and survival mindset 22:32 — How He Rebuilt His Mental Health Therapy, tools, and recovery 25:26 — Finding Purpose Beyond Football New passions and identity 29:37 — Why Time Became Everything His obsession with making life count 33:57 — Daily Habits That Keep Him Stable Simple things that help mental health 36:23 — Social Media Is Dangerous (Especially for Kids) His take on the online world 38:14 — What He’s Building Now Business, film, and future plans 40:27 — Football Has a Serious Problem What clubs must change 46:30 — Final Message: You’re Not Alone Closing thoughts + support If you’re finding things difficult, you’re not alone. Samaritans are available 24/7 at 116 123 (UK & ROI) free, confidential, and always listening Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and share if this episode resonated with you. .... ▶️ Watch & subscribe on YouTube https://lnkd.in/gY-vP8Ee 📸 Follow on Instagram https://lnkd.in/g2a562S6 🎵 Follow on TikTok https://lnkd.in/g9Bx4_Bd 🎙️ Listen on Apple Podcasts https://lnkd.in/gezQdPuP

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In my first episode of After The Final Whistle, former Premier League goalkeeper Chris Kirkland opens up about his battle with painkiller addiction, the moment he hit rock bottom, and the long road to recovery.

Chris speaks honestly about the pressures of professional football, playing through injury, and the culture of silence around mental health in the game. He shares what addiction really looked like behind the scenes, the reality of withdrawal, and how he rebuilt his life through routine, accountability, and asking for help.

This is a raw and powerful conversation about life after football, overcoming addiction, and why speaking out matters.

Series 1 of After The Final Whistle is proudly partnered with Johnstone’s Paint, a brand with a long-standing connection to football through the Johnstone’s Paint Trophy and a strong commitment to community work.

I also have had the support and training from Samaritans. If you or someone you know is struggling, you can contact Samaritans (UK & ROI) on 116 123 or visit www.samaritans.org

Chapters:

00:00 Trailer

04:47 – Football, Silence & Mental Health
Why players struggle to speak up, stigma in the game,

07:46 – Isolation in Football
Loneliness, moving clubs, and hidden struggles even among teammates

10:56 – Opening Up & Reading the Signs
Why men find it hard to talk and how to recognise when someone isn’t okay

13:01 – Pressure, Contracts & PlayingThrough Pain
Financial pressure, injury clauses, and the reality for players outside the toplevel

15:04 – How Addiction Started
From injury to anxiety, and when use turned into dependence

17:22 – Living with Addiction
Lying, hiding pills, and the lengths addiction drives you to

19:20 – Rock Bottom Moment
The night that nearly killed him and forced change

21:24 – The Cycle & The Way Out
Failed attempts to quit, withdrawal, and why support is everything

23:45 – Why This Podcast Exists (Midroll)
Creating space for honest conversations + partnership with Johnstone’s Paint

24:25 – Rockbottom, isolation, on the balcony
0:26:32 –Turning point, calling for help
0:27:12 –Relapse, lockdown struggles and rehab decision
0:29:03 –Recovery progress
0:30:50 –Severity of addiction
0:31:10 –Cold turkey withdrawal
0:37:02 –Writing the book, purpose
0:38:02 –Relief through honesty, Public reaction, support
0:40:17 –Advice: talk & seek help
0:41:13 –Support lines (Samaritans)
0:42:19 –Therapy, opening up
0:45:37 –Life after football, routine
0:47:10 –Reflection, regret, career
0:48:09 –Moving forward, staying healthy
0:48:52 – Keytools: talk, exercise, accountability

Please share with someone who might need it.

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