Their memory care community offers many opportunities for hobbies and socializing, and the time I picked to make up the session happened to coincide with chair Zumba.

Normally, my client will forgo other groups for a music therapy session, but when I offered them a choice to stay, they chose Zumba. I don’t blame them.

I would never have asked them to leave a desired activity, so I stayed with them and did Zumba with my client and their peers. Afterward, we completed our music therapy session in their room.

It was so much fun. I chair-danced with the residents, sang “That’s Amore” at the top of my lungs, and had a ball. When they chose my favorite song, “Blame it on the Boogie” by the Jackson Five, there was no stopping me. My client and I danced, kicked our feet, sang exuberantly, and thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.

As we carried on, I noticed another visitor with her father, and she didn’t look half as “jazzed” as we did doing Zumba.

I wondered if she thought I was my client’s daughter, just whooping it up with the residents like I was perfectly happy to have my loved one in memory care. I hoped she didn’t compare herself to me and think she was doing something wrong by not enthusiastically enjoying Zumba with her dad.

Toxic positivity

I’ve been meaning to do a series on toxic positivity but haven’t done a deep dive yet. I do know this: everything is not awesome.

We can pretend like there is a positive outlook to everything, and we may even believe it sometimes, but I find that leaves hard things unprocessed.

I spent some time during the pandemic pretending that humor and positivity were the answer to everything. I needed to pull myself out of a pandemic funk and I needed something to work fast.

And it did.

Until it didn’t.

Ask anyone (except my teenagers) - I am generally a positive person. I see the good in people, I find the funny in many circumstances, and I have a deep faith. I try to look on the bright side and many times I find it. But sometimes, I’m a real pill.

Both can be true

I like to use the principle “both can be true.” You can experience hard things and still find joy. You can burst out into tears that turn to laughter. You can have fun experiences and still harbor a profound sadness in your soul.

Status: it’s complicated.

As I processed my experience this morning watching a stranger interact with her father, I began to philosophize: emotions are not always black and white, either/or, one or the other, or permanent. There are many possible combinations.

While Balanced Caregivers Adventure was created to bring lightness into the heavy parts of caregiving, I never want to insinuate that positivity beats all other emotions.

It’s OK to:

• Feel down and discouraged 😢 even when others around you are happy. 🙂

• Have fun with your dad 🙂 without other people judging you. 🤨

• Enjoy yourself 🙂 even if your loved one isn’t enjoying themself. ☹️

• Feel down and discouraged 😢 when your loved one is, too. 😢

You are not “doing it wrong.” We are all allowed to have our feelings. We don’t have to stay there forever, but maybe for a time.

Earlier, in a different caregiving context, I heard someone say, “I want to be breezy and cheerful.” Yes! And, sometimes you aren’t. And that’s OK.

That’s what Balanced Caregivers Adventure is for: acknowledging the hard times, supporting each other through them, finding light where we can, and learning to remain whole while caring deeply for others.

What is Balanced Caregivers Adventure?

Balanced Caregivers Adventure began as a community to support dementia caregivers. We continue to do so wholeheartedly, and also support caregivers of all kinds who desire to remain whole while caring deeply for others. We have a free Facebook group at www.facebook.com/groups/BalancedCaregiversAdventure and are developing new groups and programs. Stay tuned!

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We have been meeting together for almost eight years! We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We will meet tomorrow, July 10, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and chair Zumba convert. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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I have a lot more emotional space in my life this summer than I had a couple of years ago - enough uncluttered headspace to watch a raven sitting in a tree for 30 minutes. Consider taking 43 seconds to experience this with me. (Turn on the sound if you can.)

From my journal: Its caw sounded like laughter, and as it preened, a single feather detached from its ebony plumage and floated off gracefully into the breeze.

You are the expert of your lived experience

As I continue to develop Balanced Caregivers Adventure, I aim to share bite-sized moments of self-maintenance and mini moments of joy for those enduring the deeply personal and profound experience of caregiving.

As I do, I hope I never come across as out of touch with the caregiving experience. If I do, you can tell me. You are the expert of your lived experience, not I.

For a while, I lived in the throes of an intense parenting season where I began to more deeply identify with the dementia caregivers I love to do life with on Friday mornings. (You know who you are!)

Not because of the similarity of our loved ones’ circumstances, but how hard it is to try to remain whole while caring deeply for others when their own lived experience changes drastically.

We watch each other love intensely, while also agonizing over our specific situations and struggling to embrace joy and fun when it arises. We fight to keep a sense of stability and the ability to take pleasure in the “little ‘a’ adventures” of daily caregiving life.

I never mean to minimize the stress, loneliness, grief, loss, and trials of caregiving as I take a lighthearted approach to self-maintenance. Never ever. You can count on me to share my experiences, foibles and all, without my judging yours.

Balanced Caregivers Adventure started as a community to support dementia caregivers, which I sincerely hope we continue to do, and now supports caregivers of all kinds who desire to remain whole while caring deeply for others.

As this newsletter gradually molts from Grace Notes Community Singers into Balanced Caregivers Adventure, watch our feathers fly.

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group, and an antidote to ruffled feathers. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We will NOT meet tomorrow, July 3, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and nature lover. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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I set my watch timer for 10 minutes and planned to post this no matter how far I’d gotten in 10 minutes. However, I gave myself some grace to finish. This one is a 22-minute and 50-second newsletter.

What’s happening?

I have been posting short reels recently on my personal Instagram account in support of busy caregivers who don’t have the time or money for a spa day! Here are the titles of some of my reels so far. Have a look!

Balanced Caregivers Adventure Instagram reels (short, 1-minute videos)

You might be a caregiver . . .

3 ways caregivers are like lighthouses

Can we normalize tears and crying?

Keeping it real, caregiver!

Mini moments of joy for the caregiver.

Mini mental health maintenance moment

This video is not a travesty of justice.

Balanced Caregivers Adventure started as a community to support dementia caregivers, and I quickly realized that caregivers of all kinds need to remain whole while caring deeply for others.

As much as I want to craft the perfect Substack newsletter, I’m not only the creator of BCA, I’m also a member.

Micro-newsletters: good enough is good enough.

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group, and an antidote to unrelenting pressure. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We WILL meet tomorrow, June 26, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a 10-minute newsletter author (sort of). I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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“It’s really important for you to take care of yourself.”

Then you’re sent on your way.

We all know it’s important to take care of ourselves, but how in one supposed to do that when they’re busy caregiving?

Balanced Caregivers Adventure is a community of people who support one another - without judgment, without perfectionism, and without pretending we have it all together.

You might be caregiving for someone with dementia, a complex child, a spouse who’s had a medical procedure, or caring for a parent with a diagnosis- a cancer diagnosis, Parkinson’s Disease, or others.

How do I take care of myself?

What does that look like - taking care of yourself?

What I hear when someone say, “Make sure you take care of yourself, . . .” is that I need to go to the spa, get a massage, go to the gym, take a yoga class - something that takes a lot of time - and I ask myself,

“When? When am I supposed to do that? “

As a caregiver, it can feel like your entire day is scripted from one appointment to the next, one task to the next, one trauma to the next, one breakdown to the next. You’re always on guard.

You deserve to let down your guard when you can, and take care of yourself.

So if that doesn’t look like taking a big chunk out of your day to do something expensive and time-consuming, what does it look like?

I founded Balanced Caregivers Adventure after wrestling with some of these ideas on my own. I’m not caring for someone in my family living with dementia, but I do have people in my family with complex needs. I am also a Gen-X woman in the middle - part of the sandwich generation. I have younger children, older parents, and I’m a professional caregiver.

In the midst of a dark season of some things happening in my family, I began to better understand what caregiving means and how hard it is.

As an outsider, it’s easy for me to come in and say, “Make sure you take care of yourself,” But when I went through a challenging caregiving situation, I really had to take some steps to make sure I was okay.

I’m not OK, you’re not OK, and that’s OK.

Let me tell you, there are times that I’m not okay. There were times I pulled the covers over my head, screaming at the top of my lungs. There was one time I fled from the building in the middle of a band rehearsal, running across the parking lot like a chicken with my head cut off.

It was hard. I knew something had to give. I could no longer keep up with that pace.

The first thing I did was reach out for help.

• I reached out to friends for help.

• I reached out to my faith community for help.

• I reached out to professionals for help.

I knew I had to make a change in how I was dealing (or not dealing) with my circumstances.

The second thing I learned to do was to take breaks. That didn’t mean taking an hour away or a day away, but it did mean:

• Stepping away from the computer and going outside.

• Seeking fewer numbing activities, like binge-watching shows.

• Doing something creative that I knew would bring me back to myself.

Hear me, there is a time for binge-watching Sweet Magnolias! There is also a time for a massage and a latte. (I’m going for an infrared sauna tonight.)

And there are also times a quick break is all you get.

A quick break.

Personally, playing the piano is one of those things I must take some time to do every day to feel whole. Some days I get busy and forget to play. Other times I don’t feel like playing, but I know that I will feel better if I do.

“Oh right,” I think, “This is part of who I am. This is important.”

If I don’t take a step to do those things, I won’t remember my core being in that way.

I needed to give myself permission to rest and to redefine what “taking care of myself” means.

First, to better take care of myself, I need to drop perfectionism.

If I decide not to start something out of fear that I won’t be able to do it fully, then I don’t receive the benefits of doing something that might only take 5 minutes to do well enough.

For example, playing scales on the piano is something I can do to use some of my energy, quiet my brain, and engage in something mindful. Mindfulness doesn’t necessarily mean quiet relaxation. Mindfulness can mean creating something, playing an instrument, doodling, or going on a quick bike ride.

There are times that I literally get on my bike and ride around the block - less than a half a mile. Even after a mini bike ride, I feel better once I return home. I got some of that energy out and dropped the perfectionism. I wasn’t going to go on a ten-mile bike ride that day, but I needed to get out and remember myself.

What is Balanced Caregivers Adventure?

BCA is a community of people who care deeply for the needs of others. It could be dementia caregiving, it could be child caregiving, it could be palliative care, caring for a parent with another long-term illness - anything.

Balanced Caregivers Adventure is a place where we come alongside one another. I’m not the expert on your situation.

I will come alongside you, not above you looking down, telling you what you should do. I’ll be with you - doing this together.

• What worked for you?

• What worked for me?

• What worked for somebody else?

So how do you become involved? I have started a Facebook group called Balanced Caregivers Adventure. I would love for you to join me there. It’s a place where we support one another, a place where we share:

• Little wins.

• Mini moments of joy and connection.

• Mini moments of caring for ourselves.

Over the next few weeks, I plan to launch an exclusive 12-week online peer group. Stay tuned!

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group, and an antidote to unrelenting pressure. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We meet tomorrow, June 12, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a quick-win enthusiast. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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I’m on another Big A Adventure, this time in the beautiful city of San Diego, attending a conference of the Association for Applied and Therapeutic Humor (AATH.org)

I arrived yesterday morning at 7:am and immediately checked in to my hotel room - what a blessing!

I fell in love with Coronado Island after visiting for the first time last December, so I set out to visit the Hotel Del Coronado yesterday before the conference began this morning. I had an amazing day exploring “The Del” and eating my way through Coronado Island! I got back to the hotel and went to dinner with my nephew. He’s wonderful company.

By the time I went to sleep, I had been up for over 20 hours! I also walked over 10 miles yesterday on my excursion. Today, my feet hurt.

My Big A Adventure is definitely visiting San Diego and attending this conference!

My little a adventure is extreme fatigue. This is a jam-packed conference anyway, and I am beginning day 1 at the tired level I normally am by day 3. My mission is going to be to find mini-moments of refreshing! I am my own best client.

I have three minutes left on my timer.

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group, and an antidote to unrelenting pressure. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We will NOT meet tomorrow, May 15, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a weary traveler. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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I have two of these contraptions. After a period of success at first, I suddenly couldn’t get the pressure cooker to come to pressure. So I bought a new one. I couldn’t get that one to work, either.

I became so frustrated that I banished both of them, one to the garage and one to its box under a kitchen counter, never to be seen or heard from again.

Until this week when I decided to try my hand at the InstantPot again.

If you haven’t used one of these, upon filling the cooker with ingredients and setting the pot to “sealing,” you wait. The little thingamabob rises up, locks in place, and the pressure cooks the stuff. Hopefully a yummy meal comes out.

After the cook time ends, you have two choices:

1. Wait until the pressure releases naturally. This can take up to 30 minutes.

2. Take cover, get a long kitchen utensil, hold it with a potholder mitten covering your hand, close your eyes, hope for the best, and flip the lever to “release.” Steam geysers up out of the spout as you jump away like a flea onto a juicy dog and the pressure releases.

How much can one pot hold? (You are the pot in this metaphor.)

“Maycember”

Internet personalities The Holderness Family has coined the term “Maycember” since May is such a typically busy month. I have this going on for sure. I have daily responsibilities, a high school graduate, a business, a family, a conference presentation, travel, and oh yes - sleep.

If I had more time, I could definitely take this metaphor to the next level. However, one thing I can do to release some of the pressure is to let go of perfectionism.

I fight against this all the time. I really would like to send out an amazing newsletter at the right time of day with no typos and content to benefit everyone.

I’m settling for a lightly edited newsletter sent out later in the day than I wanted, with no typos (maybe?), and content to benefit someone.

What do you do to release even a little bit of pressure from the chaos pressure cooker?

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group, and an antidote to unrelenting pressure. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We meet tomorrow, May 8, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a pressure cooker manager. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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Companies have also used break time in their marketing:

• “Gimme a break, gimme a break, break me off a piece of that Kit-Kat bar!”

• “Homework, homework, gimme a break! Try Summit candy bars.”

• “You deserve a break today - at McDonald’s.”

Can’t you just hear those jingles in your head?

Time to take a break.

I’m not always great about taking breaks. My husband says I have “high inertia.” If I’m doing something, I don’t want to stop. If I’m sitting around, I don’t want to get up.

When you are a caregiver - whether you are caring for your grandma living with dementia, or your child going through chemo, or yourself - it’s so hard to take a break.

Whether we don’t think we need one, or we can’t imagine a single moment of non-vigilance, it’s hard.

Who has time for a spa day or a vacation? What we need are micro-moments of release from the chaos pressure cooker. That’s what Balanced Caregivers Adventure is about.

Doesn’t that sound wonderful? You are in the right place.

In other news . . .

My green smoothie recipe pictured above is based on Thyroid Pharmacist Izabella Wentz’s “Root Cause Green Smoothie” with some minor adjustments.

1 c. full-fat no guar coconut milk

1 bunch basil

2 cups baby greens

1 cucumber

1 large carrot

1 stalk of celery (I threw it in leaves and all - why not?)

1 T. chia seeds (substituted for an avocado, which I ate 1/2 with a spoon)

1/2 peeled lemon (add)

1 t. turmeric (add)

1 t.ginger (add)

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We meet tomorrow, May 1, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a balanced caregiver. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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What’s Next?

Friday, 5/1/26 - In-person/online rehearsal, 10:30-11:45

Yes, AND

As a board-certified music therapist working with people living with dementia and their caregivers, I met a lot of carers. For a long time, in my mind, a caregiver was a person who stayed home to care for a loved one living with dementia. If that is your situation, YOU are a caregiver!

Yes. AND then my life circumstances changed. I didn’t experience the dementia diagnosis of a loved one, but two very important people in my life went off the rails. I went with them.

In the pages of the book “Travelers to Unimaginable Lands: Stories of Dementia, the Caregiver, and the Human Brain” by Dasha Kiper, I found many similarities between caring for a loved one living with dementia, and caring for loved ones with other health challenges. “That’s me,” I thought, shocked, “I’m a caregiver. So THIS is what it feels like.”

Kiper writes about how caregivers often begin to experience their own mental health and cognition challenges as they watch their loved one struggle and change. I experienced that.

It made me realize that there is way more to caregiving than what I had seen in my work as a music therapist. Before this realization, “self-care” seemed like something other people needed but I didn’t. I felt that my work was so fulfilling, that it was self-care. (News flash - it’s not. Fulfilling, yes! Self-care - nope.)

Balanced Caregivers Adventure is born

That’s when I founded Balanced Caregivers Adventure. Caregivers need community and connection. At Balanced Caregivers Adventure, everyone is the expert of their own lived experience. We come alongside one another, supporting each other. There are no hierarchies here.

You are one of us. 👽

Six Caregiver Types

I have created six “Caregiver Types” who all need community and connection. Sarah the Self-Caregiver, Parent-Caregiver Debbie and dad Darryl, Partner-Caregivers Frank and Phyllis, Child-Caregiver Charlene (Charlie) and her son Chip, Past Caregiver Leo, and Professional Caregivers Fred and Mavis.

Join us on our adventures!

Which ones are you? Please share in the comments and join our Facebook community.

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We meet tomorrow, April 24, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a balanced caregiver (watch me walk the tightrope). I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia and other health challenges deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure…

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While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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Merriam-Webster defines “adventure” as a) an undertaking usually involving danger and unknown risks, b) an exciting or remarkable experience, and c) an enterprise involving financial risk.

I would say that pretty much describes caregiver life. I often associate adventure with something positive, but it doesn’t need to.

Amy’s Big Adventure

I am currently in New York City with my mom. I won’t give away her age, but I’m 55 so she’s better than 60!

A classmate of hers, also better than 60 (oh all right, they’re better than 80!) is currently performing as Teacher Cecilia in the opera Innocence at the Metropolitan Opera of New York.

Some of their classmates came together in NYC to see the opera, and I received an invitation as an alumna of the same college. We’re making a mother-daughter trip of it.

This is a “capital ‘A’ Adventure!”

Two things can be true

In the midst of it, however, I’m experiencing a “little ‘a’ adventure” with my vision.

Upon getting out of the airplane yesterday, I thought I had a spot on my glasses. I kept trying to clean it off to no avail. I eventually realized that I have a new “floater.”

I’ve had these before that I only notice when I’m looking into the sky outdoors. No big whoop. This new one looks like a fly zooming by my left eye when I look that direction. A little whoop.

Aging, am I right? Add my left eye to the list of casualties - my right knee, my left elbow, and now my eye. None are debilitating, all are annoying. So what are my choices?

Seeing as I’m in New York City about to meet with a gaggle of octagenarian alumni who have certainly had many many adventures and are out there having more, I think I just hang with it.

I’m getting older, and it beats the alternative.

What adventures are you up? Big A and little a - both count.

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We won’t meet tomorrow since I’m out of town, but we will meet next Friday, April 24, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a life adventurer. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure..

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While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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Up until recently, I pictured a caregiver as an adult who stayed home to care for their aging loved one living with dementia.

Someone recently challenged me to broaden my understanding of what is a caregiver. I have since expanded my description of “caregiver” as anyone caring for someone with complex needs.

Rosalyn Carter once said, “There are only four kinds of people in the world: those who have been caregivers, those who are currently caregivers, those who will be caregivers, and those who will need caregivers."

I recently learned that 61% of family caregivers are still in the work force, balancing work, leisure, and family commitments. That is a staggering number.

What is your definition of a caregiver?

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We meet tomorrow, March 27, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and a balanced caregiver (watch me stand on one foot). I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with complex needs to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure..

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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I am going to sing this song with my attendees, with permission by its composer, Anne Dodson.

I think this is a brilliant example of how music and humor connect us and highlight our shared humanity. Enjoy!

Ologist Waltz:

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My video today is “transparent lite” since it involves some confidentiality for people I care deeply about. But I’m living this truth today - even though on the surface it seems like everything’s wonderful, it’s still complicated.

(*Note to self - wear a different sweater in your next backyard video.)

Join our free Balanced Caregivers Adventure Facebook group!

Join our Facebook group!

What can you expect?

You get to:

• Feel celebrated as someone capable, resourceful, and wise.

• Have a place to rest when everything feels like too much.

• Belong to a community that respects your lived experience as valid and valuable.

• Honor both your strength and your exhaustion as an act of resilience, not weakness.

What is Grace Notes?

Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We laugh a lot, and sometimes we sing. We meet tomorrow, February 20, 2026.

There is an online option, too! Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and embracer of complicated things. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure’s community singing group.

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While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

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Join our free Balanced Caregivers Adventure Facebook group!

Join our Facebook group!

What can I expect?

You can count on me to:

• Walk beside you - not ahead of you, not above you.

• Offer a place to rest when everything feels like too much.

• Respect your lived experience as valid and valuable.

• Honor both your strength and your exhaustion.

What about Grace Notes?

Yes! Grace Notes is the Balanced Caregivers Adventure community singing group. We meet tomorrow, February 13, 2026.

There is an online option, too. Join as a paid subscriber to receive the weekly Zoom code.

Join our community singing group!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and part-time bicycle rider. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure’s community singing group.

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While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here!

(I started to copy the transcript of this video and I decided that the video was enough.)

How do you know that you’ve done enough in whatever your task:

• As someone caring for a loved one living with dementia?

• Someone caring for a complex child?

• Someone running a business?

• Someone taking care of their own health needs?

We’re all humans, and we all have issues. This is a community - I want to hear your thoughts.

Please share your perspective in the comments. Just don’t do it to please me.

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and part-time people pleaser. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting experiences. This is why I created Balanced Caregivers Adventure’s community singing group.

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here

At Balanced Caregivers Adventure, you will:

• Access brain connections you forgot you had.

• Calm your nervous system.

• Release feel-good hormones.

• Reduce anxiety.

• Practice memory recall.

• Improve working memory.

• Fight loneliness

• Experience a sense of belonging

• Improve listening and conversation.

And that’s all in the first 10 minutes!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and balanced caregiver adventurer. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting music experiences. This is why I created Grace Notes Community Singers.

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here

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Sometimes my daughter comes downstairs to find me watching and asks, “Mom, are you sad?” I often watch the Girls for a pick-me-up!

I think I would say Sofia Patrillo is my favorite - she says whatever pops into her mind, which is something I sometimes do.

But Rose has some great one-liners!

Known as the ditz of the Golden Girls, Rose’s dreamy expressions, dimples, and ridiculous misunderstandings are her trademark.

But Rose can be tough! Check out this clip:

I couldn’t resist it, considering some of our new repertoire!

So what?

I love to look for what is incongruent in my environment. Rose makes me laugh, and it’s even funnier when she acts in a way incongruent with her usual personality. I don’t expect Rose to play hardball, so when she does, it’s hilarious.

One of the reasons why I love Sophia is that you never know what she is going to say. Those surprises are unexpected!f Sometimes the unexpected brings us anxiety and stress, but once we realize we are not in harm’s way, the unexpected can bring great humor.

Keep an eye out for unusual circumstances or absurd incongruity during your day. Please share what you discover!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and joy seeker. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting music experiences. This is why I created Grace Notes Community Singers.

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here

Read more

We’re in that immediate post-holiday time right now where we’re not sure what year it is and can’t remember when we last ate a salad! But time marches on (that would be 4/4 time), and on we go.

Join Grace Notes Community Singers this year as we embark on an adventure!

A Balanced Caregivers Adventure, that is.

Check it out - we are pupating! (You know, the act of being a pupa.)

A quick look back.

We ended 2025 with a wonderful meeting of our singing group for people living with neurodegenerative disorders of aging (that’s a mouthful) and their caregivers.

Grace Notes Community Singers is a dementia-friendly community and so much more. We welcome singers of any age and ability level. We are an inclusive group with something for everyone - whether you love to sing, listen, socialize, create, or just be around others, learning to infuse mini-moments of joy and calm throughout your busy day.

A quick look ahead.

In 2026, Grace Notes Community Singers, a program now under Oak Song Music Therapy’s Balanced Caregivers Adventure program, continues much as usual with an increased focus on creating and implementing doable, mini-moments of joy and calm that you can immediately put into use in your busy life.

Let’s face it - life can be “complicated.” The Balanced Carergivers Adventure is designed to help you integrate tiny, lighthearted moments into your busy day, bringing some lightness into life’s heaviness.

I am excited to continue to develop this program this year, starting with a LIVE event later this month! Whether you are a family caregiver, a leader of a caregiving community interested in implementing new ideas, or anyone who is ready to lift some of life’s heaviness off of your shoulders, this event is for you.

Tell me more!

• It’s about feeling hopeful and steady, no matter what the day brings.

• It’s about having an unshakeable sense of balance every day.

• It’s about knowing that you are not out alone walking a tightrope every day.

• It’s about real life tools you can infuse into your day just when you need it.

Find out more at Balanced Caregivers Adventure LIVE

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and joy seeker. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting music experiences. This is why I created Grace Notes Community Singers.

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here

Read more

Farewell, 2025!

I have learned a LOT in the past year. I owe some of that to Substack, but mostly I owe it to my Grace Notes members. I have learned that I am powerful, smart, and dedicated, and that I have devoted, unwavering support from our members.

Yesteryear

Beginning in October 2018, Grace Notes Community Singers enjoyed two long-term fiscal partnerships that carried us financially through seven plus years of joy and connection - including a global pandemic!

Grace Notes Community Singers met on Zoom during a global pandemic.

Dun dun DUN!

Then in February of last year, along with many other wonderful social programs, we lost our funding. I wasn’t shocked, but I felt heartbroken. Grace Notes Community Singers has been the best thing I have ever done professionally, and one of the best things I have ever done personally. I knew we couldn’t quit.

You’ve heard it said that necessity is the mother of invention. I think it’s true.

Grace Notes Community Singers set out to reinvent themselves

From February 2025 through May 2025, our trusty assistant Marc Johnson (pictured above in red), accompanist Izzy, and I volunteered our weekly services to see if we could get some funding going to continue our mission to support families living with dementia in our community.

Although losing funding was a blip on the radar (a grace note?), it gave us the opportunity to dig in, make the decision to keep moving forward, and significantly add to our community offerings.

Thank you to our paid subscribers for helping us continue! By joining as a paid member, you are financially supporting our ability to significantly improve the lives of our singers, including singers like Rudy and like Cindy whose loved ones have passed away.

Subscribe now

In 2025 we lost singers to dementia both through death and changes in life circumstances. Although those singers no longer attend weekly meetings, they are never far from our hearts and minds. This is a lesson we continue to learn throughout the years.

One of our singers recently moved into a Memory Care community and now sings for his fellow residents both upon invitation from visiting musicians and whenever he can.

His wife Barbara attributes that continued love of singing greatly to Grace Notes where her husband Ross re-discovered his love and talent for singing.

Barbara continues to attend Grace Notes rehearsals when she can. She is a gift to us, as are our other singers - people living with dementia, their caregivers, volunteers, students, and caregiver survivors.

Enter Substack

I posted my first Substack newsletter on March 27, 2025 as a way to invite community participation through both singing and financial support. Since then we have welcomed several paid members - thank you!

In 2026, our Substack will continue to provide content, connection, and comfort to caregivers across the world.

What’s next?

I usually answer that question with a schedule of meetings for the next month. Our weekly meetings resume on January 9 2026!

But now here’s something I hope you’ll really like. 🫎

Months ago, I posted a “save the date” for a caregiver respite retreat I created just for YOU - caregivers of people living with dementia. I am thrilled to announce that you can now sign up for this live event!

The Balanced Caregivers Adventure website is LIVE!

Clink the link and join us January 24, 2026!

A last-minute holiday gift idea for you!

Last-minute Secret Santa? Sorted!

Because even a last-minute gift can create laughter, conversation, and moments that matter. Whether it is a monthly or year-long subscription, a live session, or a day-long retreat. Connection, serenity, and more life balance start here.

Need it by Christmas?

No problem!

🎁 Gift option #1 - Become a paid member of Grace Notes Community Singers to give the gift of weekly uplifting experiences to someone you know in San Antonio (for in-person meetings) or elsewhere for an online option.

Upgrade Here

🎁 Gift option #2 - Give the gift of connection and life balance - the Balanced Caregivers Adventure Retreat!

Gift now while the offer is still available!

Happy Holidays!

Goodbye, 2025, hello, 2026!

Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah (belated), and Happy Kwanzaa!

Share your favorite winter holiday in the comments.

See you soon!

Happy Thanksgiving!

It’s Thanksgiving Day here in the United States, a time to reflect on our families, friends, and freedoms. I enjoy a good gratitude sesh fore sure. (Yes, I see a typo, typos make me smile and I’m thankful for smiling.)

I also know I don’t always feel grateful for hard things.

Dementia is a hard thing.

(Understatement of the year.)

There are a plethora of thankfulness posts available for your online reading today, and in the midst of hard things, some “encouragement” might feel like accusation.

“You should be thankful for more time with your loved one.” Of course you are. And it’s hard.

“You should be thankful you have supportive family around.” Of course you are. And sometimes they don’t get it.

“You should be thankful you have the chance to say goodbye.” Of course you are. Every day, all day, every night, all night, sometimes over and over and over again.

“Good job, Amy,” you might be thinking, “this is certainly not encouraging!” But wait! There’s more.

Itsy-bitsy, teenie-weenie moments of joy

I am thankful for itsy-bitsy, teenie weenie moments of joy! They may come few and far between, but when I train myself to look for them, I can expect to find them.

I had an English teacher in high school who used to call this “fabulous reality.” Each day she would invite use to share these moments with one another. Here is my list! I would love to hear yours.

• Yesterday, a giant pelican with about an eight-foot wingspan soared out from under a bridge right alongside our minivan. I felt like I was in Jurassic Park.

• Birds can spot a fish in the water from 30-100 feet in the air. I score a point every time one dive bombs the ocean in pursuit of a meal.

• My morning cup of coffee that seems to hold a world of promise for my day.

• That song that comes on and immediately transports me back to a fun memory.

• When I see birds fighting.

• Dog footprints.

• Mismatched silly socks.

• Colorful berries in a bland brown bowl of cereal. (I just saw that - it’s my mom’s next to me.)

• Sunbeams shining through clouds.

• Smiling through tears.

• My hair when I wake up in the morning - the weirder, the better.

• Toddlers walking.

• Boiling water.

• Raindrops on roses.

• Whiskers on kittens (wait, those two aren’t mine).

• Funny typos and autocorrects

• The word “gesundheit”

• Happy coincidences. (We found out a couple of choir meetings ago that about 60% of our group went to the same high school, and none of them had known each other.)

• Grace Notes

What did I miss? What are some itsy-bitsy, teenie-weenie moments of joy that bring you gratitude for every day life?

These aren’t big things - they are little things that can add up and carry you through the hard days. I would love to hear some of yours in the comments!

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and joy seeker. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting music experiences. This is why I created Grace Notes Community Singers.

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here

Read more

“Guess what? We’re exercising!”

Not only does music make movement more fun, but it’s melodic and rhythmic properties enhance movement efficiency. It’s much easier to move to a beat than to have to manufacture the timing of movement with your internal sense of rhythm.

I am sitting in the parking lot of my gym right now after a workout that I did NOT feel like doing. “I don’t want to,” I said out loud many times this morning. (I talk to myself - do you?)

Once I got to my workout, I enjoyed it well enough — I, too, like to move it, move it — but what would have made it so much better is my own personal playlist!

Here are some of my favorite songs to move to:

♫ “Mr. Blue Sky” by Electric Light Orchestra

♫ “Gloria” by U2

♫ “I Go to Extremes” by Billy Joel

♫ “My Sharona” by The Knack

♫ “To Thee Be the Glory” by Tommy Walker

What kinds of exercise do you enjoy that is made better with music?

No time? No problem!

I can hear some of you saying, “I don’t have time to exercise, I’m too busy caring for my loved one.” I hear that. For some, exercise is the last thing you feel like doing. But what if you could make it fun and involve your loved one? Here are some ideas!

♫ Get a couple of paper plates to use as “top hats” and do some high kicks to “New York, New York” by Frank Sinatra. You’re using both your upper and lower extremities and getting some exercise. This can also be your SQ — silly quotient — for the day.

♫ Listen to “Oh, What a Beautiful Morning” from Oklahoma and use exaggerated movements to act out the lyrics. Fling out your arms for a big stretch, reach up to estimate how high the corn would have to be to reach an elephant’s eye, and wave your arms to illustrate how busy the breeze is in the trees.

♫ Find your university fight song online and march around the kitchen or in your seat, lifting your knees as high as you safely can.

These are just a few ideas to get you started. I would love to know if you tried any of these and how silly you felt. Singing along and laughing will also get some fresh air into your lungs.

Need more ideas? Join us!

Grace Notes Community Singers are here to help.

My name is Amy Standridge. I am a Board-Certified Music Therapist, Certified Humor Professional, Keynote Speaker, and reluctant exerciser. I believe that caregivers and their loved ones living with dementia deserve to experience joyful moments together. My mission is to empower families living with dementia to rediscover joy and hope through uplifting music experiences. This is why I created Grace Notes Community Singers.

Share

While you still have your loved one around, upgrade here. ⬇️ Make your limited time count by making powerful positive memories together.

Upgrading your subscription gives you a chance at lifting some of the heaviness of dementia through uplifting live music experiences.

Upgrade Here

Read more