That’s right. AWHF has been out in the world for two months. After all the excitement and celebration, life has returned to a quiet existence. I’m at home with my dog and cat. When I’m not on deadline, I create crafts, play games, and I’m looking at volunteering or taking a class sometime in the future. There’s something really strange about having one of the biggest moments in my life come and go only to return to the person I was before it all started. And this begins my tips for surviving debut year.

1. After the book releases, you will still be you. Whether you have a massive fanfare or if it’s quiet, it’ll still be you and your thoughts when you go to bed at night. If you aren’t happy now, publishing a book won’t fix it. Now, I’m not going to bullshit you. Releasing a book is pretty fantastic, ngl. It’s an accomplishment you should be proud of and that feeling will linger for a long time if you feed it. However, the streets don’t turn gold beneath my feet, my soda still goes flat, and I still wake up needing to nourish my soul. All this to say, you cannot pin your happiness and health on publishing a book. Life goes on after, and it looks very similar to the life you had before.

2. Figure out what’s important to you right now. If you didn’t have a book deal, if you weren’t going on Good Morning America or whatever else might come your way, what’s the most important thing in your life? Is it family and friends? Is it supporting your community? Whatever it is, find it now because that’s going to be the thing to feed you during debut year. I was fortunate enough to have a few events during these past two months. Some were incredible with guaranteed audiences while some had five attendees that the librarian scraped up from wandering around the stacks. I could’ve been a prima donna and been pissed about that last one. I bet you know people like that. Sure, I drove a while to get there and it was likely a waste of gas money on a monetary level, but I didn’t care. I had a great time. Why? Because I know I care about people. During my book launch, I wanted people to have fun and enjoy their time with me. At another library talk, I wanted to meet other writers in my county and connect with them. I didn’t care if it was me and one person. We’d gather together and chat about whatever we wanted.

3. Ask questions because you are your most important advocate. The amount of flack I got for this in a certain community boggles my mind. If you’re in a relationship with your agent that you don’t feel comfortable asking questions or getting clarification throughout the process, you need to analyze that relationship. Your agent is your guide to this career, but you’ll miss a thousand opportunities if you don’t ask about them. The same goes for your editor, publicist, marketer, or whoever else is in your corner. One of the first things I did was send an email to my publicist asking about conventions and how I might be considered for them. I then provided her a list of conventions I’d like to be considered for. I learned a lot about the selection process and budgeting from a publicist standpoint, and I have a stronger grasp on where I fit into the equation. Had I not asked about preorder incentives and told my marketer about the recipe book Katie Sue and I were making, I don’t know if they would’ve asked me to create a recipe video for Fierce Reads. If you ever meet someone in life who puts you down for asking questions, ignore them and ask someone else because that person is a fool.

4. Do what’s best for you. This is a sort of catch-all for “moving the needle” and for building relationships. Hitting this milestone means garnering a lot of attention from a lot of unexpected sources. Folks I hadn’t spoken to in years came out of nowhere to congratulate me and show their support. Others began asking me to lunch to help them with their books without ever asking about mine. Others wanted me to look at their book, they’ll just email it really quickly, no big deal. You see what I mean here. On the business side, some folks will snub their noses at ideas you have. I knew I wanted to make a recipe book, and a lot of people were kind of meh on the idea as it wouldn’t move the needle. Sure, okay, but it’ll move the needle on my own happiness, soooooooo... The amount of times I heard something wasn’t “worth it”, I found myself circling back to the second point I made: What’s important to me? It was important to me that I had a damn good time with debut year, so I relentless pursued whatever brought me the most joy.

5. Write something else. If you have the ability to write the next thing, do it. If you’re not sure what comes next, write something anyway. It doesn’t have to be a full manuscript, but it needs to become something you obsess yourself with because it will give you a light in the dark. I won’t lie, I’ve been getting some post-pub blues. Every few days I oscillate between my book being dead to feeling entirely thrilled with all I accomplished through her. During those really bad nights and days, I pick at my next project or force myself to daydream about what might come next. It’s such a great way to remind yourself that life goes on.

I know these are internal lessons, but I really think they’re key to having a good experience. A book releasing is incredible and you deserve to enjoy every second of it. Why let doubt, fear, or anxiety get the best of you?

Leftovers

• Things I’m loving RN: Baldur’s Gate- I started another playthrough, and I will be romancing Astarion again, thx; homemade pumpkin syrup to manifest fall; taking Vander to the dog park or to swim in the river; burning incense; a Greek yogurt + peanut butter + chocolate dessert I can’t stop eating

• Things I’m leaving behind: being so sedentary; not drinking enough water; not Bricking my phone

• Things I’m embracing: hiking, crafting, baking, reading more

• What I’m watching: A:TLA- we’re about to finish up season 2, and I love how the show ages with the target audience; Marvel rewatch- I fell off with Marvel at Doctor Strange 2, and I honestly wouldn’t be doing this if it weren’t for the 1 second clip I caught of Gambit during the Doomsday trailer, smh.

• What I’m about to be watching: , I will be watching the US traitors because it’s all regular people, haha. GBBO returns as well as a new season of Taskmaster. Also, Yellowjackets is dropping in November? I am alive.

• What I’m reading: I just finished Dungeons and Drama and it’s like Kristy Boyce and I are twins. I can’t wait to get to the color guard one. I’m also halfway through book 2 of Dungeon Crawler Carl which is such a study in writing pure joy.

As always, I’m happy to talk more about debut year! It’s a wild time, and I want folks going into to be as prepared as they can be!

Cheers,
Anna

Life has been a big ball of chaos. I’m currently pushing through a cold I caught at Comic Con while also trying to meet my deadline for book two, but I wanted to take a little break to share with you the official announcement of book 2! It’s now Publishers Marketplace official which means I get to share it with you on Substack first. I’ll be making a post on Instagram in the future, and I’d love your support over there to celebrate even more when the time comes.

When I got the offer for AWHF, I was delighted and also terrified. It came with an option clause, but option clauses are not guaranteed sales. It simply means the publisher gets first dibs on an agreed-upon project. I was terrified that selling a book was a one-time-deal for me, that I was a one-trick-pony, and I wouldn’t be able to create anything that lived up to AWHF or fit in the same style. I’d always bopped around with projects (I have a an Appalachian contemporary almost portal fantasy project on the back burner). What if I couldn’t do it?

I attempted the 50 bad ideas from Emily Taylor. If you haven’t heard the Turning to Story episode on that, you should because out of that exercise came the idea for book two. All I wrote down was “Gatsby x time loop.” I went on my merry way, and hours later, the idea was scratching at me. What would it be like if Daisy, Nick, and Gatsby were thrown into a time loop where they had to become better people in order to earn a happy ending? The beauty of Gatsby is also in its tragedy. People are rotten, especially the people Fitzgerald focused on. I wanted to give it a different spin. Some people are rotten. Most people have the capacity to grow.

I also took this as an opportunity to explore a sapphic love story. This, I suspect, is going to be one of the more vulnerable parts about this book releasing. In reality, I’m a private person. I don’t mean to be that way, but I have a close circle of friends, and I love that I can be 100% me with them. I’ve also never been a big person for labeling myself, and I think it’s because I personally don’t need them. I am who I am. However, the memes about bisexual awakenings hit hard for me when they first made their appearance on the internet because I felt seen for the first time. Like, yes. This all did start with that one scene in Aladdin where Princess Jasmine wears the red outfit. Yes, it did develop when I saw every member of The Mummy cast. Yes, it did continue to grown with powerful women like Brienne of Tarth and Rebecca from Ted Lasso.

I wanted to take all those feelings, questions, and complications and channel them through Nora—my main character who is as stubborn as she is muscular. I also wanted to wrap those feelings into deep character arcs, where figuring out who you are is a part of earning your happy ending with whoever fits your soul.

Thus, I introduce to you—SCATTER THE NIGHT.

Loved AWHF? Here’s some things to look forward to…

• Magic system grounded in character development and story.

• Even more romance and kissing.

• A love triangle-ish situationship.

• Stand alone.

• Soft boys with daddy issues.

• Brilliant, over-the-top world.

• Powerful, messy FMC

• And so much more.

This book is still a very long way from hitting shelves, and it has such a process to go through before it reaches its final form. To be honest, the time between AWHF’s release and the release of SCATTER (Winter 2028) freaks me out a bit, but I’m grateful for the time it gives me to push myself and push SCATTER to be the best it can be.

For now, I’m going back to the writing cave, but I’ll happily answer any questions you’ve got for me!

Cheers,
Anna

P.S. I didn’t put a “Leftovers” section this time because I have SO MANY THINGS TO TALK ABOUT (Avatar, Vox Machina, fanfiction, resting your body, etc.). Soon.

Life has been wild. Between book launch, friends visiting, Comic Con, and band camp—all while on deadline—I’m running on absolute fumes. However, I’m also bursting with Substack posts, and I know writing them will bring me life. Some things to look forward to from me: SDCC diary, an essay on Hadestown, and a note about how resilience is a key ingredient to life.

For now, I want to break down the importance of maximizing everything a scene can do for your reader/audience. You see… I, like many others, have felt the resurgence of passion for Avatar: The Last Airbender. This was such a critical show for my creativity and love of storytelling. I remember going to college, worried I’d be considered weird for watching the finale of the original show. I remember scurrying into my dorm room to watch it only to hear at least a dozen other TVs down the hall blasting Nickelodeon.

My husband and I have started a rewatch of the entire animated IP (because the live actions can go get eaten by platypusbears), and I started to realize how much the first three episodes accomplish in such a short period of time. Nothing feels too rushed, but there’s zero wasted space.

Yes, I made a joke about it on a note, but now it’s actually happening. Allow me to present my thesis.

The Agni Kai between Zhao and Zuko is the perfect example of utilizing every aspect of a scene to lay the ground work for future arcs.

Let us begin…

***Below are major spoilers for Zuko’s arc.***

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Long ago, two creators, Michael DiMartino and Brian Konietzko, created an animated show with magical elemental bending, cute animals, and the best version of found family you’ve ever seen. Then, everything changed when people realized it tackled heavy themes such as generational trauma, abuse, and genocide. The beauty of this show is that, at no point, does it hide any of these issues for its young audience. In fact, it starts the groundwork for these big themes within the first few episodes, and one scene in particular snagged my obsession interest: the Agni Kai between Lieutenant Zhao and Prince Zuko.

Prince Zuko of the Fire Nation is, at the start, the show’s central antagonist. His goal is to capture the Avatar, with enough power to defeat the Fire Nation. However, Zuko isn’t chasing the Avatar in name of the Fire Nation; he’s doing it to reclaim his honor because Zuko has been banished. His punishment is to roam the world searching for the Avatar. If we want to get in the weeds here, his father likely sent him on this task to banish his son forever because the Avatar has not been seen for over a hundred years.

In episode two, Zuko finds the Avatar and captures him. However, Aang and his crew escape his clutches and ruin Zuko’s ship. This forces Zuko to stop at a Fire nation base to repair, causing a run in with arguably the first season’s biggest antagonist, Lieutenant Zhao—the right hand man to Fire Lord Ozai, Zuko’s father.

When Zhao attempts to stop Zuko from going after the Avatar, Zuko challenges him to an Agni Kai, a one-on-one firebending duel for honor. It is the exact same duel that Zuko lost, the exact same duel that gave him his scar, the exact same duel that sent him into banishment. We learn all of this by episode three. During the two and a half minutes of the duel, the creators lay the stage for Zuko’s redemption arc as well as lay out exactly why he deserves redemption while the people with Zhao’s mindset do not.

To make this easier, please check out the Agni Kai scene. You only have to watch two and a half minutes to follow the rest of the essay.

Now, I’m going to run us through step by step. Get firebend you some popcorn, waterbend you a drink, and let’s go.

Zhao’s opening line reveals he is a character with a superiority complex. His downfall will be, like the rest of the Fire Nation, in underestimating people. He entirely expects that Zuko has not been training, that he is as weak and foolish as he was two years ago when he lost his first Agni Kai. While he is still foolish, he’s not weak. Uncle Iroh reminds him of that by telling him to remember his basics. In contrast, Zuko says, “I refuse to let him win.” Not that he refuses to lose. His focus is entirely on his opponent while also showing honor in acknowledging that he could win. You could also argue that Zuko’s stubbornness and pride show in this line as well. Winning is all that matters because winning will allow him to return home.

The battle begins with Zuko making the same mistakes his uncle has warned him about. Firebending doesn’t come from strength; it comes from the breath. Here, Zuko unleashes powerful, punching attacks at Zhao and is out of breath within seconds. This is a representation Zuko’s refusal to change. He still clings to the idea that success comes from power and domination, a theme that also rings true with the domineering Fire Nation and his father, the person he wishes to impress the most.

Zhao bats every single attack away like a it’s Sunday morning and the living is easy. His movements are controlled and purposeful, demonstrating years of skill and confidence Zuko has not earned.

Here we get a crucial reminder and piece of information from Uncle Iroh. “Basics, Zuko. Break his root!” Anyone else from the Fire Nation would be disgusted at Zuko. They’d jeer and heckle him. Not Iroh. Iroh believes in Zuko not because he’s the Prince but because he loves him. Iroh isn’t just a beloved character for his humor, wisdom, and love of tea. He’s beloved because he is a signal to the audience that Zuko is worthy of love. Despite all the horrible things he does, Iroh knows there’s something good in him, and he brings that goodness out. It allows us to see the best in Zuko and root for his redemption.

The next few seconds are a pain train for Zuko. He’s pushed back, back, back until his own root is broken. It’s done quickly, succinctly, and in such a way that you almost pity him. Then there’s this shot:

Zhao throws a devastating blow, and we see terror in Zuko’s eyes. This fear, we learn later, is connected to his first Agni Kai against his father. During it, he refused to fight out of honor toward his father and his Fire Lord. If anything, we learn that Zuko, who has been told he is dishonorable, is one of the most honorable characters yet. When he spoke up against his father, it was to try and help his nation and people, but his father took it as a slight and punished him.

Later in the series, we see this duel and we see Zhao delight in the punishment and violence bestowed on a fourteen-year-old. We see the other Fire Nation council members stare stoically on, allowing this abuse to happen. We also see Zuko’s own sister share Zhao’s smirk. It reveals that Zuko has been raised in an environment in which no one supports him, no one cares for him, no one wants his ideals that put his people first. No one except Iroh who looks away, who cannot bare to see his nephew hurt.

Zhao’s attack sends him back to this moment, and it leaves him with a choice: accept defeat or fight back. What does he do? He listens to his Uncle and learns. He doesn’t give into fear. He break’s Zhao’s root and gains the upper hand in the most badass way possible. What a flare for the dramatics! Then what does our boy do? HE SMIRKS! That’s right! It’s HIS turn to smirk at this dusty, old piece of ash. It’s HIS turn to put Zhao on the defensive. He’s earned this moment not just in power, but in his ability to conquer his fear and change. We love this smirk and cheer for it. Now, how does he win this thing? The basics. He performs simple moves, not big, flashy, muscle-y moves.

This is change. This tells the audience Zuko is capable of changing and not just in his fighting prowess. He is capable of listening, of opening himself up to new ideas, of admitting he can be wrong. Will he openly do these things for the better? Not for an entire season, baby! Growth doesn’t happen over night. But the groundwork can be laid as early as episode one or chapter one.

Now it’s Zuko’s turn to leave Zhao scarred and give him a reminder of his dishonor. Zhao even commands him to do it, revealing a deep-seated beliefs about violence and honor. He smirked at Zuko during his first Agni Kai not just because he’s a sicko who wants to see a petulant teenager hurt, but because this is what he’s learned from centuries of Fire Nation beliefs.

What does Zuko do? WARNING SHOT, BABY! He leaves the ground scorched beside Zhao’s head, a sign he could’ve destroyed him but chose to show mercy instead. Again, we are taught that Zuko isn’t a monster. He’s a boy struggling to find his way in the world, a boy who, at the end of the day, will always choose mercy.

Even when Zhao tries to goad him into firing by calling him a coward, AND BRINGING HIS DADDY INTO IT, Zuko doesn’t get angry. He doesn’t fire back. He gives him a fair, stern promise: if Zhao steps up again, Zuko will kick his ass. That’s not the actual line, but in my head, it’s canon. A leader doesn’t posture. A leader doesn’t gloat. A leader doesn’t ridicule. A leader leads.

The most important thing of all happens next. Zuko turns his back on Zhao. The scene could have ended with a glimpse of an angry Zhao, but they chose to give us this final note.

In turning his back, Zuko demonstrates his full belief that the Fire Nation is honorable. Once defeated, they should accept it. Zuko accepted defeat when his father banished him. It’s not even a question that others should do the same.

But Zhao represents everything that’s wrong about the Fire Nation. He attacks when his enemy is vulnerable. It is the most dishonorable thing a warrior can do. This isn’t just true for the Avatar universe. We all know this from history and other stories, which makes this a powerful move. We don’t have to know anything about Avatar politics to register that Zhao, and the Fire Nation by proxy, are the true villains because this is how they choose to behave.

What’s different this time? Iroh. Your Uncle, my Uncle, everyone’s Uncle doesn’t look away. He too has changed since that first Agni Kai. He will never look away from the violence again. Instead, he’s going to stop it. In one swift move, he becomes the parent for Zuko and immobilizes Zhao. In reality, the Agni Kai isn’t over. No one drew blood. Zhao has every right to attack Zuko and truly end the duel. Not this time, says Iroh.

”Disgraceful,” he says to Zhao after launching his char-broiled butt halfway across the arena with one hand. We learn Iroh also has the ability to throw down, but he chooses when and where to use his power. Clearly, he uses it to support his nephew, someone we are starting to believe actually deserves it. Then, he does something that breaks Zuko’s rage. He praises him. “Even in exile, my nephew is more honorable than you.” I am crying as I type those words because they reveal what Zuko really needs in order to change: support. All he needs is someone to believe in him and his capacity to be a good person.

This line also opens up Zuko’s mind to the idea that maybe, just maybe, he’s been an honorable son and prince all along. That maybe, just maybe it’s his father who was wrong. I like to think of moment’s like these as cracks in the wall. This is the crack that will fracture everything Zuko has ever believed about himself. It won’t grow for several episodes, but the break has already started.

Finally, Iroh ends this scene, and his stone-cold dress down of Zhao, by doing the honorable thing: thanking him for his hospitality. It is a humble, gracious move that demonstrates Iroh’s true character, the character of someone who not only talks the talk, but walks the walk. His character isn’t just built in epic moments like stopping Zhao or firebending like a dragon. It’s also threaded into every line, every moment. Again, they could’ve had Zuko and Iroh walk away with some fat musical beat in the background. Nope. They make sure to stick the landing by having him dip out with grace.

It’s that grace and refusal to hold grudges that will see Iroh’s love for Zuko thrive even in the darkest times. It’s that steadfast loyalty that Zuko will learn to love and accept, even he believes he isn’t deserving of it.

All of this ground work is laid in TWO AND A HALF MINUTES in the BEGINNING of the show. I bet most of us writers have heard to not start books with a fight because we’re not invested in the characters. While this showdown doesn’t happen until episode three, that’s still so early in the series. We barely know Zuko and Iroh, and we’ve only just met Zhao. However, we become invested not because of the badass moves, but because of what they represent and what they reveal about these characters.

This fight is part of something I’ve been really scratching at for the last year or so: maximizing every scene. It’s easy to have a scene serve a purpose. The lovers kiss, they break up, the antagonist finally defeats the protagonist, etc. The real skill is making those scenes hit on all the notes like character development, theme, and worldbuilding. The divine level of skill is doing this early in the work to foreshadow the road ahead.

There’s a reason Zuko’s arc is regarded as one of the best redemption arcs ever written, and I think a lot of it has to do with the careful foundation the creators laid from the very first time we meet him. We serve at the pleasure of the Fire Lord.

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Thank you for coming to my obscenely long Ted Talk about a fight scene. If you enjoyed this, please let me know! I will happily break down any other obscure, miniscule craft bits I think about as I’m consuming media. I definitely have a Hadestown post brewing.

Flameo, Hotman!
Anna

Hello, friends!

If I’m keeping up with time, ALL WE HUNGER FOR has been out for three weeks. I’m still processing all of my feelings about debut and the inevitable quiet after such an extraordinary joy. When I’m ready, I’ll share all my feelings on it. For now, just know that gratitude is coming out of every single pore.

For now, I want to talk to you about fast drafting and how I absolutely have to learn it in order to hit this deadline: August 10th. Originally, the deadline was for the 27th, but that definitely couldn’t happen because of debut week and… because of a little secret I’ve been holding onto. I’ll spill that information that the end!

Fast Drafting Prep

There’s no way I could hit my 20k goals without prep. I’m someone who needs a plan. I used to think that I needed to have every single beat in every single chapter outlined, but I’m learning that’s not the case—not for this book.

I started with a seven-layer plot dip that entirely changed when my editor suggested I cut a POV. That’s right, I’m writing a single POV for the first time in… years. Literal years. It forced me to reimagine the story and anchor the themes to a single character who could carry a reader through this journey. I’m so grateful for this note. It made the story come alive in a way I hadn’t anticipated, and it cleared away a lot of the clutter to cut so much deeper at the message I wanted to scratch at.

From there, I made a scene by scene outline to fit my new seven-layer plot dip. (If you’re not familiar with it, check out Turning to Story). This part of the process fought me, and I think it’s because I was just so thrown off by all the possibilities of how I could carry my characters through such immense change. The nature of this book is that, truly, anything is possible. I just needed to find what worked for my characters and their arcs.

That? That’s what allowed me to accomplish all I did this week.

Week One: The Words

My goal is to write 20k each week. I gave myself some very simple rules to accomplish this.

1. Try to write every single day. You cannot write all day every day, but you can write every day.

2. Listen to your body and soul. Walk, visit with friends, eat, nap. When you need a break, take a break. Find a place to add in words later.

3. Keep it fun. Outpace the critic in your head because you can fix it later.

That’s it. Three rules to keep my fingers flying across the keyboard.

After each session, I journaled about how I felt about the words, the process, and life in general.

Here’s the results.

Monday- 5,672— Admittedly, I was high on the energy of getting started! I’ve always been someone who treats Mondays with enthusiasm because I’m fully rested and there’s so much potential for the week. Also, I treated this like a mini-writing retreat at the library. Something about buying a coffee, leaving my house, and plugging in at a quiet table in the corner makes me lock in.

Tuesday- 2,987— Appointments in the afternoon kept me from writing all day, but I got up early and wrote my words in the morning. This follow Rule 1. Rather than get annoyed with appointments or responsibilities, I made space for them and writing.

Wednesday- 4,632— I went and grabbed a smoothie and took a walk with a friend. It was much needed both for my body and my soul. Moments like these keep me grounded in what’s really important. After, I carried that energy into two sessions in the afternoon.

Thursday- 2,583— I was exhausted this day, and I pinpointed that it was because I hadn’t been walking as much as I should. Yesterday’s jaunt in the park reminded me that I need to be caring for my body. Did I listen to this later in the week? No. Am I going to listen to it this week? Yes.

Friday- 1,968— I wrote in the morning with a friend at the library. I always feel energized when I’m working beside someone who also gets to work! However, the word count was kept short because I did an impromptu dinner with my parents. Again, I wanted to have dinner with them. I wanted to hang out and eat good food and laugh. I made room for it.

Saturday- 0— This was a hard day. Days like these sneak up on me at times. They’re days where I don’t realize I have a lot of pressure building up until the events are right in front of me. Saturday was the Gotcha Day for our dog Duck who passed away earlier this year. The reality of losing him and our beloved cat Mirana this year sort of collapsed on me. It also felt like a boiling point because my husband and I had made plans to celebrate him with Vander (our newest addition), but life got in the way. Rather than fully melt down, I talked it out with my husband, took a nap, and enjoyed a calm, rainy Saturday.

Sunday- 2,118— Because I chose to reset on Saturday, I was able to fully embrace Sunday. I got up early and crushed words before friends arrived to eat good food and play some Magic the Gathering. Again, making space in my brain and my schedule helps me stay balanced, especially in terms of expectations for myself and my work.

Week One: What’d We Learn?

This is the reason I wanted to track my progress both in terms of productivity and in my heart. More and more, publishing requires authors to turn around deadlines at alarming rates. If you can learn to adapt your process for a faster pace, it can only help you.

Going into this, I knew I wouldn’t sacrifice joy. I wanted to feel good about my work. I wanted to learn. I wanted to revel in creativity because I haven’t written a first draft in years at this point. It is so important to me that I keep this love of the craft moving forward because I’m focused on longevity in the publishing industry.

How have I managed this? I learned something important to writing a first draft without every scene figured out. Characters must change in every scene. They can go forward, they can go backward, but they must change. Figure out the one issue your character has, and make every scene push them toward change.

For example, my main character doesn’t feel worthy of love. At the end of the day, all of her emotions sprout from not feeling worthy. When I feel her getting angry, I ask why she’s feeling angry in a scene, and I tie it back to that feeling of self-worth. Is she feeling guilty? Is she feeling selfish? Is she feeling insignificant next to another character?

I have my plot beats figured out. Now, I can fly by asking myself how my MC will respond to these events. I think this is possible because I spent a ton of time mapping out my characters. I know their backgrounds, their worst fear, their misbeliefs, and their deepest (unconscious) desires. Now, everything revolves around that, and I can create with wild abandon. Going into drafting, did I know that my MC and her father used to sit on the rooftop of their apartment as a way to decompress? Nope. Did I know that her family used to house dinners for the entire apartment? Nope. Did I know one the boy she meets has an obsession with suits? Not at all. I figured all these things out because they connect deeply to the heart of these characters.

Stay tuned for next week’s diary!

The Leftovers

1. I watched The Drama, and I’m so glad I went into it not knowing anything. What an incredible film that does the absolute magic of making the audience feel what the characters are feeling, PLUS that connects to the theme?! Genius.

2. I also watched Widow’s Bay, and it is the perfect example of a show that feels like the writers and actors had a blast creating. It’s a weird genre-mashup, and I’m depressed the second season isn’t here yet.

3. I hurt my back moving an unwieldy table yesterday, so now I’m at the laptop with an IcyHot patch and a sore pride.

4. The news? Oh. Yes. I’m waiting to announce on Instagram, but somehow your girl swindled her way into being invited to San Diego Comic-Con! I’ve got some major imposter syndrome I’m fighting against because I’m literally surrounded by powerhouses of the industry, but I’m so damn grateful for this opportunity! I’ll be participating in four events throughout the weekend. Also, I’ll be posting a newsletter afterward to talk about what this means to the nerdy, impoverished version of me who never dreamed she’d make it to Comic Con as an attendee let alone a guest. Wild.

That’s all for now! I have words to write!

Anna

More on accessibility later. I want to celebrate AWHF’s release a little differently. How about a post summarizing the major events from creation to publication?

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Hunger’s Journey

The Beginning- Spring 2020

My confidence had hit an all time low. From 2016-2020, I’d run the gambit on emotions in the writing journey. I’d gone from knowing nothing and writing with blissful ignorance to being overwhelmed by all the writing craft I didn’t know. My second book received major attention during Pitch Wars (a writing contest), and I went into the agent showcase with the highest of hopes only to receive three—count ‘em, three—requests. Two of which were from shmagents. Hopes. Dashed.

In spring of 2020, I got the idea for my Fuck It Book. I didn’t care what was trending, I didn’t care about agenting, I didn’t care about any of that. I cared about writing a story I loved, something I wanted to see in the world.

The idea happened while watching an episode of Great British Bake Off. I asked my husband why GBBO didn’t have any magic, and he kindly reminded me that it was in something he and others like to call “the real world” and that magic didn’t actually exist.

I wanted to change that.

The original idea was wild. It was something like a Hades/Persephone retelling with an underground orchard. It was cool, but it was NOT GBBO and not what I’d been struck by.

It took me a few months to crank out a draft that bore any sort of resemblance to the version it is today.

Pitch Wars Part 2- 2021 to 2022

I am either a believer in exposure therapy or a glutton for pain because I entered Pitch Wars again. However, four years and a lot of learning had changed me. By the time I submitted to the contest, I knew I’d taken the book as far as I could on my own. Critique partners gave it the seal of approval, yet there was something about it that just didn’t feel as if it were the best it could be. It needed help, and help arrived in the form of Sunya Mara. Out of so many entries (I heard the acceptance rate was lower than that of Harvard), Sunya chose AWHF as the book she wanted to take on, and I would never be the same.

Sunya not only helped me make the magic system and worldbuilding stronger, but she taught me how to assess issues in my own writing and how to interpret feedback. For my fellow Turning to Story listeners, Sunya is the one who gave me the idea of looking for the note beneath the note. If a reader says the ending fell flat for them, you ask yourself why. Flat means not climactic. Is that because the stakes aren’t clear? Is that because the pacing is off? Does the ending connect thematically with the rest of the book? It gives you a starting place for diagnosing your story’s weaknesses.

The agent showcase came, and I received more than three shmagent requests. One of which was my future agent!

Agented and Revising—2022-2025

In 2022, I signed with my agent, Michaela Whatnall. From that first call to our frantic texts over beautiful covers, Mike has been exactly what they were from the start: the perfect champion for my work and my career. They are a lover of craft and aren’t afraid of suggesting I revise just one more time. Their excitement is infectious and bolsters me when I’m worn out and too exhausted to try again.

We revised this book three more times together. The pacing eluded us and the romance became tricky to thread into the revolution that takes over the later half of the book. Looking back, I took so long at this stage because I wanted to get it right. My process now is, thankfully, a lot quicker, but these years were important in helping me fall in love with the process again.

Then we went on submission. It received great praise and many passes.

Then… the revise and resubmit.

I cried and not out of happiness. For the first time in years, I was exhausted. Whatever bottomless source of energy and verve I had for craft and leveling up my writing had suddenly found bedrock. I couldn’t fathom another edit. Their notes? To fix the pacing. Apparently, a standalone competition book should have the first round of the competition start before the midpoint. 🙃

I sat on that feedback for about two months. As we approached the second round of submission, I needed to make a decision. Continue with the old draft or revise.

I saw merit in the notes I’d received. I knew the editor was right—the pacing was totally off in the first half—but the idea of reimagining the book again almost broke me. I was on a writing retreat with two friends when I got off the phone with Mike and cried on the floor because I knew what I had to do . . . I had to revise.

I revised. I tore through the draft again even though I’d totally fallen out of love with the book. This was the first pass I’d done where it was hard to feel anything but exhaustion and defeat. I just wanted to go through the entire submission process and be done with it. I wanted to be free to write something new. I wanted my writer right of passage.

The book was purchased and not by the editor who requested the revision.

I learned to trust my internal compass that day. Had I not trusted my gut and committed to giving AWHF its best shot, it would likely not be sitting on a shelf in a store near you. It would be saved to my computer, collecting virtual dust.

Editor and Finding the Joy Again—2025-2026

By the time my editor bought the book, it only needed one medium-sized structural edit. The bulk of my editor’s notes were to add more. More romance. More danger. More magic. More. More. More. For once, I got to turn the volume up. The wordcount ballooned from a tiny 84k to 98k, and it was purely me reveling in the character arcs, magic system, and so much more.

My editor has such a keen eye for readership. She respected the fact that I AWHF was always meant to be a lean book, but she never let us compromise on prose or character development. She also never let me get away with mediocre fixes. She pushed me to think deeply, to look at scenes a new way, to play. Boy, did I need that. My editor made me fall in love with this book again because I could see it through her eyes.

Her keen sense of marketing gave me a different vision of AWHF. The aspects of it I almost deleted (the matchstick tattoo, Gaetan, the kid Nik meets at the river, etc.)? Those became some of the most important aspects to marketing the book. I didn’t understand it then. I do now, and it’s changing the way I think about crafting my next book. I’m not trying to write a marketable book, but I am trying to write one that lends itself to marketing. More on that later.

Now— June 23rd, 2026

I am earnestly crying as I type this final segment. Looking back, the path seems so clear. What started out in that “Inspire” notebook is now a book on shelves. It is a story critique partners, friends, family, my agent, my editor, and my entire publishing team have championed. As someone who has spent the majority of their life not believing in themselves, you believed in me. My husband believed in me when I got lost for hours each night. My critique partners believed in me when I came to them again and again for help. My agent believed in me even when I took three years to get it right. My editor believed in me when this book landed in her inbox.

When I talk to students about my path to publication, I remind them that I’m just a girl from a small town in Western North Carolina. If I have the grit to never give up, they do too. You do too, Substack friend.

Thank You

I’ve said it a million times here and on Instagram. I say it to my husband every hour of every day, and I’m sure he’s probably tired of it. He’ll probably come tell me he’s not because he reads my Substack posts. Hi. I love you. I dedicated the book to you because you’ve been there from the start. <3

Thank you to anyone who has ever believed in me and this book. Thank you for listening to Turning to Story. Thank you for reading, following, cheering, and sharing your journeys with me.

Here’s to a season of AWHF! In her honor, please eat something sweet and delicious today.

Cookbook? Cookbook!

I want to make sure that you’re aware of how amazing is. Not only is she a fabulous writer, but she’s a talented baker and content creator. She has been such a support system and partner these last few months. Truly, I don’t know why she hasn’t thrown me into the sea because of my late messages and forgetful brain.

Katie has created a cookbook for AWHF! It’s complete with recipes inspired by the characters, and I am here to tell you that every single one is DELICIOUS! You’ll need this for when AWHF makes you hungry!

Fill out this form to receive it!

Love always,

Anna

I will also be celebrating the release of my debut novel on the 23rd.

What a sentence to type. What a sentence to read out loud. What a sentence to even exist.

I am well aware my life is changing. This season might be here for a few months, a decade, or—if I’m really lucky—much longer than that. Once upon a time, that uncertainty would’ve terrified me. Sometimes I feel that same fear churning in my belly, and I wanted to take today as an opportunity to remind myself that I have the tools to tackle whatever may come. That I am the kind of person who will wring every ounce of joy out of the experiences, relationships, and hardships headed my way.

I present to you . . . a list.

37 Lessons from 27 Years

1. Nature heals everything. Even if all you have is a patch of grass or a warm square of sun, embrace it when you’re heart is heavy. Nature reminds me beauty is everywhere—the pattern of a leaf, ants marching in a line, the glint of sunlight on the water. It also reminds me that my worries are, in the grand scheme of things, so small.

2. Baked goods. There’s always time for a sweet treat. Just do it. You deserve it.

3. Compliment others. Someone’s got a nice dress? Say it. Someone’s kicking ass at a workout? Say it. They’ve got an interesting hobby? Ask them questions and compliment their knowledge. It changes everything.

4. Surprise your friends. A couple years ago, I helped smuggle two long-distance friends into my house as a surprise for my husband and friend. The video remains my favorite. Also, I was later surprised by a devious shower curtain smuggled into my house. It is now a Christmas legend, swapped between houses.

5. People remember how you made them feel. This feels so cliché, but it’s true. I taught public school for 10 years, and I’m lucky enough to have students return with memories of time in my class. Usually, it’s about how fun, supported, or loved they felt.

6. Always pet the dog/cat. If you see a furry friend, and the owner is okay with it or the animal is not in the wild, pet it. Your sweet fur-baby next to you? Give them a gentle pat right now. Take them to the park. Give them an extra treat. Cherish that time. We do not deserve the loyalty and joy pets bring us.

7. Thank the people who keep your town running. Sanitation, library, fast food, landscaping, sewage, plumbing, etc.. There is a reason I kept a line in AWHF about the way some people view these jobs. They are essential and valuable. Thank them. Be kind. Bake them cookies during the holidays. Leave little snacks and drinks for the delivery driver if you can.

8. Use your voice with ferocity and compassion. I’m still learning to have confidence and believe that I’m not spewing hot garbage from my brain. Trust your heart. When it says something is wrong, say/do something about it, but do it in the name of compassion rather than anger or defensiveness.

9. Ask questions. Curiosity has gotten me so far. It’s brought some wonderful people into my life, opened doors I had no idea existed, and given me an edge in my career. If you’re worried about looking foolish or ‘stupid’, don’t. The only foolish person is the one who doesn’t ask questions.

10. Be ready to learn and change your mind. When you ask those questions, be truly open to learning. Our current political and social climate will try and force you to believe that you must NEVER change your mind. That doing so is a sign of weakness. Believing only what your echo chamber tells you is a sign of weakness.

11. Life is about the little moments. Another cliché, but a perusal through my phone tells me differently. I made origami and printed out Shrek masks for students. I made pizza with my nephews. There are so many pictures of my friends just playing games or throwing discs.

12. Making one big change makes the next easier. I was terrified of change until I hit a breaking point with my school. I was working too hard to be so undervalued, so I did the one thing I never thought I could—I quit and moved schools. The new school? The most abusive work environment I’ve ever been in. Guess what I did? I quit and got a job at the library. Change meant accepting my worth. Change meant chasing a life that suited me. Change meant I could find resilience in any storm.

13. The invisible work adds up. I wrote five books in the hours between teaching, exercise, theatre, and so much more. Minutes stolen here and there. I have only a handful of pictures, and yet the work got done.

14. Make the call! Send the email. The worst they can do is tell you no.

15. Take the leap into something big. That project you’ve always wanted to do? That dream you’ve always had in the back of your head? Identify the first step to chasing it, and do it. Today. Right now.

16. Learn to know when something isn’t for you. Learn this for projects, jobs, and people. Learn to do this without judgment.

17. Vulnerability invites others in. I am a closed up, clam-shell of a human. Sure, I share my thoughts and journey here and on podcasts, but the reality is that it takes a while for me to truly let people in. The moments I’ve done so have changed my life.

18. Anticipate that everyone is doing their best. Sure, some people aren’t, and they’re unkind. Big deal. Most people are truly just doing their best and don’t have terrible intentions. Be kind.

19. Do what is right with your soul. People will try and convince you that what they want is really what’s best for you. Sometimes it’s true. Other times, they’re doing what’s best for them. Determine what kindles your soul.

20. When you think of others, reach out. I don’t do this enough. Anxiety and ADHD are a terrible demons! However, I’m getting better at picking up the phone and sending the message just to let people know I quoted an inside joke or saw their picture.

21. Inclusion not exclusion. Our house runs on one rule: everyone is welcome. We want all people to feel warm and comfortable the moment they step through our doors.

22. People are people— not investments. Parks and Recreation helped me understand something about people. “He’s a tourist. He vacations in people’s lives, takes pictures, puts them in his scrapbook, and moves on. All he’s interested in are stories.” Thank you, Ron Swanson. Some people move through life looking for the next investment, the next person to add to their scrapbook. I am not that person.

23. Your body will change; love it in all phases. I’ve dealt with body dysmorphia and PCOS my entire life. I’ve seen my body in peak condition (slinging flags at a half-time show in college), and I’ve seen it at its softest form. This body hosted pep-rallies, was taped to a gym wall, hiked mountains, gave warm hugs when they were needed most, ran through airports for last-second flights, and so much more. Thanks, body.

24. The sun will rise. During a visit to Acadia, my husband and I went to watch the sun rise on Cadillac Summit. People dotted the mountain side, and fog covered the horizon. Eventually, a woman said, “Nothing happened.” My husband and I died. “The sun still rose, Janet.” This is now a common quote in our household. Even if the clouds are thick and the atmosphere heavy, the sun still rose. You’ll see it again soon.

25. How is this the best thing that’s ever happened to me? One of my favorite YouTuber’s (Struthless) asks himself this question during some of the roughest moments of his life. At first, I railed against it. With distance, this has become my go-to question with things get tough.

26. Make new traditions. Life comes in seasons. Don’t cling so hard to seasons gone-by. Create joy for new seasons. Board games on Monday nights. Putting up holiday decorations to Home Alone or Elf. Exchange books on Christmas eve. BBQ chicken nacho Sundays.

27. Try new things. When life feels stale, do something different. Take a pottery class, pick up disc golf, try a micro challenge.

28. There’s always time for a sit in the sun. So many pictures of my sweet rainbow-bridge boy Duck are of him in the sun. There is always time to soak up five minutes of sun. Always.

29. Sandwiches after a hike/river ride just taste better. Something about being out, working your body, and disconnecting from everything make that next meal SING. It also reminds me of my childhood summers. A ham and cheese sandwich by the pool? Perfection.

30. Be mindful of where your attention goes. Your attention is water and fertilizer for your life. If you focus on the negative, then the negatives will be all you see.

31. We’ve got one earth, one body. Care for them. Pick up your trash. Plant some native flowers. Fight AI data centers. Stretch. Move your muscles. Give this earth and yourself what you need to feel your best.

32. Learn to be comfortable alone. The last year and a half have been tough. I’ve been alone more than ever in my life, and it’s caused me to wrestle with my own worst enemy. Learn to love yourself when no one is around.

33. Empathy and curiosity open doors. I hate that I’m quoting 7 Habits, but here we are. “Seek first to understand, then to be understood.”

34. Delight in the joy of seeing your loved ones thriving. They’ve all got cool hobbies and interests. Ask questions! Learn something new. My nephew is in tech school for welding right now, and I’m learning so much about his accomplishments. I love hearing about his projects and why he’s passed them. Another good friend knows everything about birds. I always love his random facts, bird calls, and obsessive hunts to spot them in the wild.

35. There’s always room. Pull up another chair. Pop another bottle. Schedule more time. There’s room for everyone.

36. Communicate your needs. Before getting married, I was a terrible communicator. I’m still rough around the edges, but my husband has helped me learn how to voice my needs. Passive aggression is no longer my tool. It never served me anyway.

37. Practice gratitude. During my worst moment at an abusive workplace, I would write down five things I was grateful for. I did this every morning. Sometimes, the list was simple: sunlight, my husband, a kiss from my dog, hot water. Those lists really forced me to dig deep and find the things truly worth fighting for—the things that mattered. Now, in one of the most amazing seasons of my life, I still practice gratitude: kind people who answer my questions, friends who support my excitements and disappointments, my patient husband, the luck that brought me here, the hardwork that brought me here, the skill that brought me here, people who took a chance on me.

Any lessons you’ve learned? Share them with me.

That’s all for now. I’ll see you in a few days to celebrate All We Hunger For’s release!

Cheers,

Anna

Talking about these truths makes me feel so much better because the social media aspect of promoting HUNGER has been a little exhausting. Up until these past few months, I had a balanced relationship with Instagram. I shared authentic parts of myself to make genuine connections, and I think that’s because I had nothing to promote but community. Now, I have a duty to promote the thing I wrote, something I’m so damn proud to have hitting shelves in *checks calendar* three weeks. The switch has been difficult, and I’m finding my voice in this new stage of the career.

But here on Substack? You get the version of me that’s deeply connected to my messy, teenage Livejournal phase. Honestly? Totally fine with that because it means reminding you that behind all the AWHF Neon Light Advertisements I keep shilling out on Instagram, I am just a gremlin in a corner, downing three different beverages at once while lamenting I haven’t moved enough.

I am also someone who is deeply excited for this season of life. Saying that to you, or to anyone, is a weird and big step for me. I’ve always been reserved in my emotions—especially excitement or anticipation. I always fear the let down, the catch I didn’t see coming, the bit of information that pulls the rug from beneath my giddily dancing feet. I’ve been working through this with a therapist (she’s the best), and I think it comes from a fear that I haven’t worked hard enough to truly earn successes.

What a load of bullshit.

I’m here to tell you what I needed to hear: you are allowed to be happy and excited. You are allowed to celebrate your wins. You are allowed to be proud of your accomplishments. You are allowed to acknowledge that both luck AND skill played a hand in whatever it is you have accomplished.

This industry is mercurial. The attention HUNGER is receiving today may not come to my second book. It may not come my way again. The accolades and Big Shiny Boxes listed below may never happen for me ever again. That’s just the business.

This means I have two options: dampen my emotional response to this season of life out of fear of being crushed OR rejoice and be grateful for all that comes my way.

Therein lies the heart of this newsletter. Gratitude. I say it all the time on Instagram and in my emails to readers, friends, my publishing team, booksellers, and family (but not the bogus AI fishing attempts sent through my website. Sit down). I’m grateful. I’m just so damn awed and humbled by anyone and everyone who has invested in me and my work.

My promise is to keep giving back. To share whatever I know, feel, or experience with you in the hopes that it helps. To answer questions. To share on Turning to Story. To be there for those who have been there for me.

In the spirit of HUNGER, let’s celebrate some stuff going on.

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AWHF News

• First, the biggest shoutout to for working with me to create an AWHF Cookbook! The recipes are SO damn delicious, y’all. We’ve got a lemon pound cake, spicy caramel brownies, a delightful quiche, and so many other recipes which Katie created with HUNGER in mind. If you want that, please fill out this Google Form.

• Preordered HUNGER and want character art and recipe cards? Fill out this Google Form too!

• Want a personalized or signed copy of AWHF? You can preorder from any of these stores, and you’ll automatically get the preorder goodies!

  

• While it’s not officially released for by OwlCrate, AWHF is the June pick for this year. I worked closely with the team at OwlCrate to help approve designs for the entire package, and I cannot begin to tell you how gorgeous it is. Also, the amount of work the designers and artists put in to making these book packages so unique is so damn special. The way the team understood HUNGER and put all the details into visual form made me sob no less than 12937189237 times. Like, look at this end page sneak peek. If you’ve read HUNGER, you know what picture that is!

• You can read a short excerpt of HUNGER on Reactor!

• Oh, no big deal. HUNGER was in the Goodreads newsletter as an anticipated read for June—AND SHE’S NEXT TO LEIGH BARDUGO! Years ago, when I really set my sights on publishing, I turned to Shadow and Bone to teach myself how to write. I have my original copy upstairs and all marked up. This is ridiculously surreal.

  

• HUNGER is also on the Best Books of June for Barnes & Noble and, as of this morning, a June Editor’s Pick for Amazon.

  

  

  

• Here is the list of events surrounding HUNGER. If you’re in WNC or the piedmont of NC, come join me! I’d love to see you!

  

• There’s still TWO things in the pipeline for HUNGER and myself that I can’t tell you about yet, but please know I am BURSTING with delight about both of them.

Deadline…?

Yes, I am on deadline again. A swift one at that. What am I on deadline for? Please know that it’s twisty, romantic, time-loopy, and queer. It hasn’t been officially announced, so thanks for celebrating with me early!

The Leftovers

• I’ve been listening to The Great Divide on repeat. Doors and Paid Time Off will be on my wrapped. Betting you now.

• My husband and I just finished watching The Jinx. If you’re into true crime or you want more reasons to eat the rich, please watch. It has more twists and turns than a soap opera and yet it’s real life. If you’ve watched it, you’re obligated to message me so I can talk to you about story structure.

• We took a family trip to the Outterbanks a week or so ago. Vander sat curled up on my husband’s lap for the entire eight hour drive because he gets car sick like his mom, we watched the new season of Secret Millionaire, and walked to the beach daily.

  

• I can’t stop playing WoW. The coordination required to beat a raid or a mythic dungeon on a high level calls to my inner honors student. Also, when I top the charts as a healer, I secretly feel like a badass.

I have no idea what the next three weeks have in store for me, but I’m so ready to embrace it with an open heart!

Cheers!

Anna

Hello friends!

Quick newsletter today because I wanted to let you all know about the ARC tour I’m doing for ALL WE HUNGER FOR. What is an ARC tour? It’s where we send an advanced reader copy of AWHF around to different readers in the United States. Who are the readers? It could be you! If you wanted to, of course.

I got the idea from and who sent their books on tour as a way to generate hype and build community. That’s really what I want to do here. Since leaving education, I’ve really missed having and giving back to a community, and I think this is the perfect way to do it.

If you participate, you’re encouraged to leave notes, doodles, and reactions in the book. You can analyze it for writing craft or simply draw daggers every time Nik’s dad is mentioned. Lafontaine sucks, and I can’t wait for you to hate him as much as I do.

Helpful Information:

• You’ll have one week to read then ship the ARC to someone else.

• I’ll pay for shipping.

• You’ll also get a bookmark for participating.

As of right now, I have no limit to the number of participants, but I might have to put a cap on it simply because I am not made of money. Haha!

If you’re interested, please fill out the survey here —>ARC TOUR SURVEY

Thanks for all the support so far, and I can’t wait to have some fun with this!

Cheers,

Anna

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What I didn’t expect to find were a handful of quotes answering exactly what I’ve been questioning for the last year: what happens when what you prepared isn’t right?

Eisenhower said, “In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable.”

“Plans are of little importance, but planning is essential,” said Winston Churchill.

And my favorite so far is from Judson L. Moore: “A bad plan is better than no plan, and the most important quality of any plan is the flexibility to change.”

I don’t know much about Moore. Apparently he wrote a book on “how to identify and pursue life goals starting at a young age”, and the book is called Exponential Happiness. The packaging sure fits my vibe, so I’ll run with the quote.

What Moore struck here is something I’ve been wrestling with both personally and professionally. If you’re a listener of Turning to Story, you know that I’ve been chasing the idea of planning a novel so well that I can avoid massive rewrites. I’ve studied dozens of plot structures, analyzed hundreds of pieces of media, and figured out several ways that work for me during the planning process. I start with character and build my world from the lessons I want them to learn, then I strengthen the theme and restructure the world and character arcs.

I did this months long process for my option pitch (a pitch my publisher gets first dibs on if they want to buy) and turned materials I was sure would knock my editor right out of the park. No notes. Perfection.

Wrong.

My editor loved the pitch, yes! She declared it would be a strong follow-up to my debut novel!

But…

There needed to be a new magic system. The romance needed to be increased. The worldbuilding needed to be lusher. Oh, and what if we took out a major mechanic of the world?

My first instinct wasn’t curiosity or an eagerness to dive back in and make the book stronger. It was to crawl in the shower and cry because, if you know me, there’s nothing more healing than a good shower cry.

Two ideas were fighting for dominance over my nervous system:

1. I KNEW this feedback meant my editor and the team liked my work and wanted to keep working with me. Feedback from an editor, let alone the entire team, is not guaranteed. They could’ve easily told me no and cut their losses. This feedback was to give me the best chance at acquisitions (the meeting where the company decides if they’ll buy).

2. I FELT I’d failed because I hadn’t “nailed it” on the first try. I was dumb. Useless. Incompetent.

You’re probably thinking, “Wow. That’s something she needs to unpack. Go to therapy.”

I did. We’re working on how much pressure I put on myself, and that’s a substack for another day.

What I want to talk about it how I eventually responded to this absolutely detrimental (not) feedback.

I embraced it. It’s what I always do when given notes. From the very beginning of this process, long before I knew how to interpret critique, I listened to every bit of advice people gave because I was hungry to learn and succeed. Eventually, I learned to look for the note beneath the note—a technique Sunya Mara, my writing mentor and fellow YA fantasy author, taught me. It means to take a line of feedback and ask why it was given.

If someone says they hated your main character because they’re too whiny, you ask yourself why they think that. Is it because they don’t understand the character’s struggles? Are the stakes and dangers not high enough? Did you not demonstrate the immaturity and lack of experience your character has?

Finding the note beneath the note allows you the opportunity to keep what you hold dear in a story. More importantly, it means making your story the strongest version possible because you embrace the change rather than running from it.

My debut novel went through at least ten major revisions throughout its life. This doesn’t count the earliest draft that I abandoned halfway through and it doesn’t count polish revisions where I strengthened chapters. I’m talking ten overhauls, and I spent many nights crying in the shower because I didn’t know if I had the strength to envision the story a different way. My MMC had already gone from having magic to not having magic, Elara had an adoptive brother who I later scrapped, and a subplot about multiple murders had been deleted. I had so many versions of this book swirling around my head, that I couldn’t possibly find another way to tell the story.

But I did, and that book is now my debut novel. It’s the book that my editor resonated deeply with and saw a promise for marketing. It’s the book I always wanted it to be but hadn’t learned enough about the process to get it there when I first started writing Elara and Nik’s journey. I got there because I was flexible to change.

While I’m just at the start of this career, I have a sneaking suspicion that success will continue to be about preparedness and opportunity, but it will also be about embracing change. It will be about finding the note beneath the note. I know many writers don’t like talking about the market or marketability, but I suggest embracing it because the more you learn about this career you want to venture into, the more prepared you are to succeed.

Many of the changes my editor suggested weren’t just for making my option pitch as entertaining and exciting as possible, it was also to make it exciting for marketing. Doing so meant clearing away the version I had in mind, a version that would work in another age bracket or genre, but not for YA fantasy romance. It meant letting go and allowing something new, exciting, and so much stronger in.

I mourn the version I originally had in mind for this book, but I know this version shines. I’m ready to let in what could be. What I removed works for another story. What I added, thanks to my editor and agent, is going to make this book something exciting and fun. It’s going to allow readers to connect so much more deeply with the main character, and I’m so excited to start working on it.

I say all this with fingers crossed and my intent to buy a little treat on Wednesday as I wait to hear from acquisitions. Regardless of what they say, I’m happy I made these changes. I’m grateful for the chance to learn about the business side of publishing because I get to use it as a tool for my art and for my success.

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The Leftovers

1. Now that it’s spring, I’m spending every moment I can outside in the sunshine. I curl up in a cozy chair with a nice drink and I read, write, and play with Vander who likes to chew sticks.

2. Vander went on his first hike, and he loved it. He’s going to be a great adventure buddy!

   

3. I talked recently on Instagram about how I keep whimsy in my life. The answer is crafting, crafting fancy drinks at home, and gardening.

   

4. Shrinking is the best show I’ve seen in years, and I think it’s exactly what everyone needs. It’ll break you down and build you back up again. However, if anyone is watching this season, check me if I’m wrong but… the vibe is LOW! I miss happy Jimmy, and I’m biting my nails about these last two episodes.

5. I’m addicted to World of Warcraft, and I’m so angry about it. I can’t stop doing side quests, and I’m obsessed with leveling up my gear, collecting all the cute mounts, and decorating my house.

6. If you’d like to join the ritual my dear friend created, I’ll be having a fancy coffee drink and a nice walk on Wednesday to celebrate doing hard things. Also, it’s a way to send good vibes into the universe as a major decision gets made.

Thanks for hanging, friends!

Anna

Also, my publisher is hosting another Goodreads giveaway for an ARC of HUNGER.

ALSO, I’ll be posting blurbs every day this week to honor authors who ran so I could walk. Truly, I’m so grateful for what is happening in my life and the people who champion me every single time I post something. I see you. I love you.

Hobbiting

I’ll call it Hobbiting because it sounds much more whimsical than what it really is: withdrawing, secluding, hiding??? Essentially, I’ve pulled way back from social media and using my phone. I’ve pulled so far back that when I return to Instagram or even YouTube, I recoil a bit. Maybe algorithm is just broken or maybe I see beyond the emerald curtain to the wizard of capitalism hanging out behind so much content, but I just feel like a lot of stuff out there is content churning for content churning. I click on a video only to turn it off two minutes later because I don’t see the deeper point in it, or I’m barraged by a message that’s about making me thinner, more productive, or some other thing I’m not aware I lack.

I’ve been leaning into gentle content—people crafting or resetting their houses for spring, essays about artists or historians, or even just cute dog pictures and videos.

This separation from fast-paced production has encouraged me to pay attention. I’ve got a post brewing about Leonardo da Vinci and how so much of his brilliance came from noticing details, hyperfixations, and rampant ADHD. Mostly, it’s from the way he lived, the way he stopped to take in details and asked questions about his observations.

But that’s for another week.

The Leftovers

Things I’ve been consuming, loving, or thinking about:

• Cold foam. Easiest thing to make that takes my beverage goblining to another level. Take heavy whipping cream and add in your favorite syrup. Whisk to desired consistency then bathe your cold brew or matcha in it to feel like a BOSS.

• Shrinking. Every single episode kills and then restores my soul. Please watch it it if you need some goodness in your life.

• Jeopardy. My husband and I are fiendish about Jeopardy. We’ve hunted down old episodes and every spinoff imagined, and we’re still hungry for me. Final Jeopardy rarely gets past me.

• Biographies. A friend gifted me Anything You Can Imagine: Peter Jackson and the Making of Middle-Earth, and I’ve only recently started it. Did you know JRR Tolkien sold the rights for the Lord of the Rings films, basically giving away all rights for… like nothing? He just wanted to create a college fund for his grandchildren. Also, he hated early productions of the film and detested movies/TV shows as an art film. Boo.

• Flowers. There are so many good flowers showing up because it’s springtime finally. Prepare for ALL the flower content.

Cheers!
Anna

Nothing sums up life lately better than that. Time, as the Steve Miller Band once said, keeps on slipping, slipping, slipping into the future. I’m nearing the end of my March calendar, something I printed off in desperation to maintain some semblance of organization for the next three or four months, and a little bit of panic has crept in because . . . Hunger comes out in three months. My debut book, the one I’ve worked on for literal years, will be in reader hands in June, and I just might throw up, scream, and eat my weight in ice cream to celebrate.

Until then, I’m going to do what’s been bringing me joy for the last month, and those things are here, in a chaotic list:

1. Snuggle my dog even though I desperately need to get writing started for the day.

2. Put my hands in dirt.

3. Make some terrible art.

4. Make that art better the next time.

5. Declutter.

6. Watch movies (the entire Matrix saga rocks, and I won’t debate it).

7. Watch less YouTube.

8. Listen to entire albums on repeat (Death Cab for Cutie).

9. Take Vitamin D.

10. Make enough cold brew to last me a month.

11. Drink said cold brew.

12. Listen to 17 hrs worth of audiobook about Leonardo da Vinci.

13. Don’t feel bad because he accomplished so much in his life. NO! He rarely finished projects because he was most definitely undiagnosed and unmedicated ADHD as well as a raging perfectionist.

14. Share weird facts like that with friends.

15. Grill food outside in the sun.

16. Collect all the things in World of Warcraft.

17. Seriously. All. The. Things.

Barnes & Noble Preorder Sale

As you might’ve heard from other authors on substack, Instagram, or on the wind from where they’ve shouted from mountain tops, Barnes and Noble is doing a 25% discount on all preorders, and All We Hunger For is included. All you have to do is join their free rewards program and use code PREORDER25 at checkout!

HUNGER Updates

Hunger has been getting lots of love and support from friends, family, readers, industry professionals, and my publisher. Sometimes things happen, and I’m honestly thrown. Like, they are HAPPENING! I’ve been working on owning my accomplishments and accepting good things happening to me (thanks therapy), so I will just squeal a little bit here.

Publisher’s Weekly called Hunger a “lush romantasy debut” and said, “Tangible descriptions of mouthwatering dishes combine with empathetic portrayals of social and economic disparity, as experienced by a memorably drawn cast, described as having varying skin tones. It’s a tantalizing recipe of complex plotting, Parisian atmosphere, political intrigue, arts-based magic, and revolution.”

Tantalizing? Complex plotting?! I’ll take it because it took so many revisions and so many chats with my agent to get the plots balanced just right.

Also, a little bird told me another Goodreads giveaway will be happening soon, so keep your eyes peeled for that! (Don’t worry, I’ll send you an update!)

Speaking of Goodreads, please look at how over 26,000 people have added it to their TBR. I am going to pass right the hell out. I know TBR doesn’t translate to sales, but this kind of reach is incredible, and I’m just so grateful.

Finally, a preorder campaign is headed your way soon! I’m working with local bookstores to get you some signed copies and some goodies!

Closing Thoughts

I’ll be back to my usual essays and reflective posts soon. For now, I’m trying to get my option book into my editor’s hands. Oh, you want a sneak peek? Well . . .

Would it be an Anna Mercier book without a boy suffering from daddy issues?

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That’s all for now!

Vander says take a nap. You deserve it. <3

Hello friends, and welcome to 2026.

I know it’s already March, and we’ve been in the new year for over two months now, but it feels like this week is the first time I’ve been able to appreciate the new year for what it is: a deep breath of air after a long, long winter.

You see, this year started with the biggest hit my husband and I have ever taken. Our beautiful, wonderful dog passed. I shared Duck with you here and on Instagram because he was such a massive part of our life. Truly, he was our child. February was a blur of grief, change, and love. During those hazy weeks, I wrapped so much care and love around my heart and wore it like armor. Everyone who shared stories with me about their pets, lit candles for Duck, or sent us flowers made the grief that much sharper and yet the love that much larger.

Duck was only with us for six and a half years, but damn did he leave an impact. It’s cheesy as hell, but he made me a better person.

1. Pour into people who pour into you. In moments of great joy or great sorrow, it will become very clear who is in your corner. That first week, I wasn’t sure how my husband and I would survive the sorrow, but we managed thanks to the outpouring of love that came from so many corners of our world. It proved how much people love us and how many of them loved Duck.

2. Take the walk. Whether you live alone, with a pet, or child, take the walk. Plant the flower. Redo that piece of furniture. Sit outside a coffee shop. Make a recipe. Play pretend. Even if you’re tired or feel like you can’t crawl out of bed, take a second and just do the thing because tomorrow is not guaranteed. Obviously we need rest. Obviously there are times we can’t because of depression or time constraints or whatever. But don’t let those things rule your life for too long. I would give anything to take one more walk with Duck.

3. Enjoy the simple things. Duck lived a life of medical hardship from the moment he came to us to the moment we said goodbye. The badass had four surgeries (two to remove tumors, two to fix his CCL tear). He also had seizures, a low tolerance for heat, and a skin condition. Dogs. Are. Resilient. Not once did his spirit diminish because of these things. Not once did he show any signs of depression or anxiety. He loved his sun spot, scrambled down the stairs at any mention of the word “car” or “park”, and damn did he live for a good ball. When I think about the troubles he faced, it makes me feel that much stronger.

There’s so much more, but I need time. I’ve typed and retyped these words a thousand different times, and this is the best I can do for now. He deserves so much more, and I let him know that when I tell him goodnight and good morning every day. Snuggle your fur babies close for me. Send me pictures. I want to give them kisses.

A New Addition

Something I’ve had to learn throughout therapy is that contradictory things can be true. In fact, it’s healthy to realize this and try to hold both in your hands. The silence Duck left behind, the absolute void in which my husband and I were putting so much of our love became insufferable. We both knew we wanted another baby to love, but we weren’t going to rush it.

Then comes Vander.

Vander has huge paws and the coloring looks like boxing gloves. Also, he saved two orphans. If you know the TV show Arcane, then you get his name. He’s taught us that it’s possible to grieve and to love, to miss one and cherish another. We can build new memories while holding the others close. He lies in Duck’s sunspot, curls up on the couch for naps, and detests the car. He is his own little creature, and we love him for it.

All We Hunger For Updates

I missed this opportunity in January, but I can solidly say… MY BOOK COMES OUT THIS YEAR! Like… in less than FOUR MONTHS! WHAT?!

If you don’t follow me on Instagram, I strongly suggest you do. I’ll be posting about ARC appearances at future conventions as well as any Goodreads giveaways you can partake in (such as the one going on RIGHT NOW).

I’ll also share with you that I’ve been buried in deadlines for a super secret, super amazing thing happening for HUNGER. You can look forward to that announcement sometime in the near future. Just know that I had to figure out a signature REAL fast, and I had to sign A LOT of things. 😉😱

Also, next post is a final copy tour?!?!?!?! BECAUSE THEY ARRIVED!

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The Leftovers

Things I’ve been loving/doing lately.

1. Being off my phone. I got a Brick, and I every single time I tap on my phone to open IG or Discord, I feel like I’ve been living in a dystopian world ruled by technology. Like, I didn’t even want to check IG, so why the hell am I opening it?!

2. Watching movies. My writing journey started with acting and a love of film, and I’ve gone back to that. I’ve been devouring some thrillers from the 80s and 90s as well as the entire Matrix series. I also watched La La Land for the first time ever (don’t throw things at me), and it was such a joy.

3. Puppy time. Something about losing Duck and gaining a puppy changed my brain chemistry. I feel like I’ve been more present than ever. I enjoy playtime and get an extra snuggle in even though I have work to do.

4. Crafts. I’m trying air dry clay to make little gifts for folks, and it’s genuinely the best. Even if it doesn’t work or looks silly, I’m having a BLAST.

5. Counting Crows. Something about spring (or false spring, if you live in Western North Carolina), makes me want to roll down my windows and blast the entirety of the Hard Candy and August and Everything After albums.

That’s all from me for now. My goal is to get back to regular posts now that it feels like we’re going to be okay. <3 If no one’s told you that today, you’re going to be okay. You can do this.

Anna

I am not very good at year-end reviews. At first, I feel as if I have nothing to say. That I learned nothing throughout the year. Then, after reviewing photos, files, and old messages, I realize that I’ve learned and experienced far more than I could ever distill into a single readable post. I guess that’s been the the use of my Substack in 2025—a public way to hold onto some of the lessons and experiences.

This year has been one of dualities. Explosive yet quiet. Lifechanging yet stagnant. Lonely yet filled with friends and family. Peaceful yet anxious.

Not to channel our good friend Galinda, but I think I finally understand a little bit of what she means in “Couldn’t be Happier.” Sure, I didn’t sell out my best friend to become the puppet of a magicless fraud, but I did have my dream come true. Maybe they’re the same thing? Who knows. Anyway, I sold a book. In 2026, I’ll be a published author. Not only that, but readers will get a beautiful edition with sprayed edges, designed endpapers, and so much more. While I worked hard the last few years to keep my feet on the ground about publishing, “it is, I admit, the tiniest bit unlike I anticipated.” 2025 started with so much hustle and bustle. Edits after edits. Deadlines after deadlines. Cover design, cover reveal… quiet. So much quiet. A pop of great news! Quiet again.

I returned to therapy in November for a singular visit, and, in great therapist fashion, my therapist said one thing that sort of woke me up. “You’re really in a state of transition, huh?”

Reader, I was agog. I thought I’d already transitioned. I quit my job in January, struggled through months of doubt, grief, and work only to arrive on the other side a more melancholy version of myself. This was the new me, and she was just a little off, that’s all. A little different. I was fine.

Lol. As if.

Let’s jump in.

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Five Lessons from 2025

This year, I started using Pinterest more than ever because I used it as a tool for personal growth. Somewhere deep down, I must’ve known this year was about change because I made a special board all about what I want life to feel like. I’ll use some snapshots from that board to share my lessons with you.

1. Choose people who make your heart smile.

Between struggling to understand the social dynamics of a large debut Discord, needing time to develop deeper friendships, and comparing my relationships to others, my confidence took a hit. The internet has a way of tricking you into believing you should be anything but who you are. I wasted countless hours this year on analyzing myself. Every word, every interaction. I broke myself down into tiny molecules to try and figure out why I was struggling when everyone else seemed to be thriving.

Reality? Those people who talked over me, ignored me, or criticized me weren’t my people. Nothing right or wrong about that. It’s just a truth, and the moment I realized it, the better my life was. In trying to force relationships, I put my self-worth into the hands of people who weren’t my people.

So far, I’ve got stellar folks in my corner and they’re here because they like me. That or I bribed them with cupcakes. You be the judge.

Anyway, if you’re not happy with the folks around you, analyze whether they make your heart smile. If they don’t, maybe it’s time to let them go, or maybe it’s time their opinions held less value.

2. Take your time.

   

“Anna Pace” was a term I heard often as a child. It was never a good thing. It meant slow, dragging behind, or unfocused. It probably meant being consumed by the neurodivergence fairies who operated in two modes: hyper-fixation or total chaos. This has been a double-edged sword for most of life. When it comes to tasks I really enjoy (writing, baking, woodworking, etc.), I go hard, and I let it consume me entirely. Everything else? Right into the void where missing socks from the dryer go.

Also, I’m a methodical thinker. It takes time for me to sit and churn through my thoughts before drafting or creating an idea. It takes time for me to visualize projects, and I can’t start anything unless I have an idea of what the end product will look like. This is the true Anna Pace, and it’s something I’m proud of.

Without Anna Pace, I wouldn’t have a book coming out. Without Anna Pace, I wouldn’t be the cohost of a podcast. Without Anna Pace, I wouldn’t be right where I am at this very moment, slow sipping a cup of coffee and admiring the birds at the feeder.

3. Happiness is contentment.

Over the last few years, my husband and I have embraced a life of simplicity. At first, many people didn’t understand why we rarely went out to eat, why we didn’t go shopping for new clothes every month, or why we meal-prepped every Sunday. They saw it as deprivation—frugality gone too far. What they didn’t see was how my husband and I used the money we saved. Sure, my husband saves with a wicked expansive spreadsheet, but we also have a carefully curated coffee and tea bar at home. Whenever the government makes us angry, we donate. We’ve donated a lot this last year. We’ve been furious. Who hasn’t?

This lessons isn’t about money. It’s about what I learned by shifting my focus from excess to enough. Nothing stops me from my morning warm beverage routine of sitting in a patch of sunshine with my dog because moments like those are the fruit of life. As we age, we spend more time alone than with friends or family, so it’s important to find contentment in daily activities.

For most of my life, I confused happiness and contentment. I believed most moments should be filled with elation and pure joy. The reality is that contentment, simply being okay with the way things are is true happiness. I buy birdseed because I like watching the birds and squirrels. I take long walks just to see how the river changes each season. I smile and wave at strangers because life is too damn short not to.

4. Intention is the first step to bringing an idea to life.

While reading Artist’s Way this year, I had to confront my own complicated feelings about the concept of manifestation. It always seemed a bit woo-woo to me. However, I had some great conversations with the ever-amazing about it, and she helped me realize that manifestation is all about intention. When you intend for something, and you focus on it with all our being, your habits and actions naturally follow. It kind of reminds me of the trick from Atomic Habits. People who say they don’t smoke are less likely to pick up a cigarette than those who say they’re trying to quit. You simply declare that you are something, believe it with your whole heart, then act.

It’s the acting on it part that I sometimes struggle with. I want to lift and hike more consistently, but I fail to follow through. Now I wonder if I that’s because I’m not making it a priority—that I’m not truly intending it as much as I want other things in my life. Lessons like this are helpful for me because it gives me a way to diagnose parts of my life I’m unhappy with.

5. Sometimes a choice is right for a season.

   

If we go back to Anna Pace, this lesson has taken the longest for me to internalize. I used to approach every situation, project, and day as if it were the most important of my life. I thought the people in my life would always be there, that the relationships I had with them should remain the same forever, that even the smallest decisions I made would impact my future beyond reckoning.

Stressful as hell.

In January, I quit my job. I became a full-time author. I fretted about that decision for months, and it took until just last month for me to truly realize that it’s not irreversible. Jobs are not comets that come around once every two billion years. Education is a dumpster fire in this country, and positions will open up.

I started three different novel ideas this year. Three. I pitched every single one of them to my agent (sorry . . . I’ll get better at this), but only one survived the gauntlet of my attention span. Will I ever write the other two? No idea. The were probably right for a time, but they might not be right for whatever is around the corner.

I think this helps me appreciate every step on this debut journey. I have no idea if HUNGER will sell enough copies to appease my publisher for a continued career with them. I have no idea if I’ll be a bestseller, whisked away on tour and talking with Netflix execs about an adaptation (call me). Whatever happens next will be part of the journey, part of the season, and a new season is always around the corner.

Other Top Stuff of 2025

1. If you haven’t watched Beau Miles on YouTube, please stop what you’re doing and go watch. He’s all about creating adventure in your backyard and creating genuine moments with strangers. If I were to teach Thoreau and Emerson again, I’d show his videos as a much cooler, much more modern transcendentalist. Check out his video were he does a Three Day Cycling Adventure to Work.

2. I bought a reMarkable 2. It changed my life. I wish I could be someone who had different journal ecosystems and could keep up with them, but they end up forgotten at the bottom of a drawer because I can’t stand clutter around my desk most days. The reMarkable is an expensive purchase, and I walked many dogs to earn up for it, but it’s been the greatest decision for my writing and my head.

3. Say yes to more coffee dates. This year, I took a leaf from a friends book, and I started inviting everyone from my two different friend circles to come play board games, watch movies, or just grab coffee. It’s changed everything. We get to experience different personalities, cackle as someone the group has never met kicks our asses in Magic the Gathering, and see the silliest versions of each other. Go on coffee dates.

4. The UK Celebrity Traitors was a gift I will be forever grateful for.

5. Analog is more than a trend for me. I promised myself that if taking photos with my camera lasted more than three months, I’d buy myself a film camera. I now have a Canon AE1, which forces me to put down my phone, go outside, and learn a new skill. I also carry around my Kindle or a book so I don’t open my phone. My reMarkable makes me put away the notes app and my laptop for brainstorming. Long story short, my head is much clearer now that I don’t have social media buzzing around my brain (most of the time……).

6. Take a new class! Find free classes and programs in your area and take them. If you can afford it, pay for one. Pottery may not be something I’ll do forever, but I freaking love the people I’ve met, the experiences I’ve had, and the little clay creations I eat and drink out of every day. Also, it’s healthy to remind yourself that you can be bad at something.

7. Throw a craft day. Whether you invite friends or just have fun on your own, grab cheap supplies or thrift something you want to spruce up and do it. This year, I made a garden table out of scrap wood, some cute decorations for Halloween, and a big-ass mess in my house. 13/10 would burn my fingers with hot glue again.

Honestly, I could go on, and I think that might be the thing about reflection on an entire year. At first, it’s just a year, gone in the blink of an eye, but when you really look at it, there’s a lot to uncover. Some horrors. Some delights. Who knows?

I hope you had more delights that horrors, friends.

Thanks for hanging with me in 2025. I hope to see you in 2026.

Cheers,
Anna

p.s. In 12hrs, I can say my book comes out THIS YEAR. WTF?!?!?!

Oh, hi! Hello there! It’s been a while since my last newsletter, and that’s because life got a little (a lot) busy. In November, I flew to NYC to celebrate ’s launch of GILDED IN VENGEANCE, flew back home with a friend to spend a few days playing games and hanging out, and then I drove to YALLFest in Charleston to join in the revelry that is bookish delight. I also pet so many dogs. So. Many. Dogs.

I spent the majority of October anxious about publishing and my place in this industry. I felt entirely unmoored, and I still do in some ways. However, this is my evergreen reminder that therapy is life-changing. I returned for my first appointment since January, and my therapist broke through my anxieties in a single session by asking “Where do you think these feelings come from?” OUCH. I hadn’t verbalized the origin because I was terrified it would open a part of myself I thought had been healed, terrified that I was still “broken” and that I’d “failed” therapy.

Dipping back into those old wounds made space for me to understand my current aches and insecurities. It allowed me to face my struggles with a clear head. If video games have taught me anything, it’s that a monster is much easier to face when you know what it is and can learn its moves. My monster? Transition. January was rough because I transitioned from teaching to being a full-time author. November and October were difficult because I was, and still am, transitioning. My agent and I are making plans to pitch my second book, things are in the works for my debut that could pan out and change the game, my debut could also be quietly released into the void of a saturated industry. Who knows?

What I do know is that I have an incredible support system. I have amazing authors ahead of me who reach back and pull me up or embrace me at conferences when I’m entirely lost, friends who make me laugh and play card games until 2am, and a husband who cheers at every milestone and does the dishes and fills my water cup when I’m not looking. Also dogs. So. Many. Dogs.

Moving the Needle

Onto the subject of the title. If you’ve never heard of YALLFest, it’s a young adult literature festival hosted by Blue Bicycle Books in Charleston, SC. There are author panels, signing lines, and chances for readers to get their hands on ARCS (advanced reader copies). In short, it’s bookish paradise for readers. I’ve attended a few times both as a reader and as a writer looking to connect with friends from across the country. It’s how I’ve met and made memories with so many amazing people.

This year, I attended as an enthusiastic reader who also happens to have a book releasing next June. In deciding whether to go or not, I simply asked myself a simple question: is this a valuable use of my time and money? I was not attending as a panelist and my publisher was not paying my way. This meant AirBnB and food out of my own wallet. This meant time away from home, writing, my husband, and my pets.

I had to determine what made something like this valuable. For me, it came down to two things: 1) Would I have fun? 2) Would I get to connect with people in a meaningful way? A third, unspoken rule, is whether I can comfortably afford it or not.

Publishing is a business, but relationships and friendships are key for me. In going, I would get to meet some new 2026 Debut folks, spend valuable time with author friends I barely chat with online, and meet some friends I haven’t ever physically met before. Sure, those connections can help in a business sense, but I’m mostly concerned about connecting with people in a genuine, meaningful way. YALLFest would give me that opportunity to laugh at a dinner table with strangers, share cupcakes with folks in a signing line, and chat with readers waiting for ARCS.

That last one surprised me the most. I’m good at being myself, but I am not good at selling my work. I’m awkward, clumsy, and desperate to keep the conversation focused on something we can both connect with. A fellow-writing friend made me brave. She encouraged me to whip out those bookmarks and move my way down the signing line. It also helped that I had Leigh Bardugo’s latest post in my head the entire time in which she talks about how she enjoyed this part of the job in the beginning, and I don’t want to miss a single moment of this journey.

It started with two teen readers eyeing my bookmarks and recipe cards. I asked them if they wanted one, and the conversation blossomed. They asked about the book and when it came out, I asked about their time at YALLFest and squealed about their bookish earrings. We chatted and laughed then they asked their mom to take a picture of us, and… I’m crying typing this. I’m nobody, y’all. I mean that in a realistic way. My book doesn’t come out until June, it’s not on TikTok, and these readers haven’t read it. But they wanted a picture to remember this moment, this conversation, and they invited me into their weekend of fun.

Later down the line, I chatted with folks about their favorite parts of YALLFest, lamented the long lines, and even talked shop with a pastry chef. I met so many folks who were excited for books and open to hearing about mine despite their exhaustion and, I’m sure, overstimulation from the day.

In publishing, we often talk about whether something we do will “move the needle” of sales. In truth, this is so important to consider because, for many authors, there might be an urge to drop every dollar you have into advertising, preorder goodies, posters, ring lights, or any manner of things you think will increase your sales. This is deeply valid because publishing forces many authors to be their own publicists because they won’t ever see a dollar put toward a marketing plan.

Since returning home from YALLFest, I’ve settled back into my sweatpants, messy bun, and reheated cups of coffee, but the feeling of chatting with readers remains. What this means is that my questions about value ring true for me:

1. Will I have fun doing this new thing?

2. Will I get to connect with people in a meaningful way?

I encourage everyone to figure out what “value” means to you. It could absolutely be moving the needle of sales, and that’s fair! It could be including your family or making progress toward some goal. I firmly believe that once you understand what’s valuable to you, experiences throughout your writing journey will feel richer and they’ll open your life up for more opportunities.

In short, embrace doing things that add value to your life because life is too damn short.

Leftovers

1. In Charleston, I discovered a bit of a hidden gem of a beach, and I watched the waves crash against the rocks for at least twenty minutes. Sometimes, when I need a breath, I close my eyes and go back there.

   

2. The Traitors UK Celebrity season did not disappoint, and I collected so many good memes. Alan Carr as a Traitor was a gift to the universe. Thank you, Claudia Winkelmann.

3. The Avatar Magic the Gathering set is gorgeous, well done, and I cry every time I look at the Leaves from the Vine card.

4. I received this email from my agent about something, and it adequately describes how I’m feeling inside.

   

5. I started Baldur’s Gate 3 again. I’m stuck between romancing Astarion or Karlach. I’ll take any suggestions or rationales, please.

Until next time!

Anna

Got your cozy bev ready? Good. Let’s chat.

Octobers

I, like many, am so grateful to live in a world of Octobers. WNC is abundant in autumn cheer, and I happen to live in a small town that is straight out of your favorite romance novel or Hallmark movie. It’s the kind of place that encourages soups, warm nights with friends, and bonfires, and I’m pushed myself to do exactly that. I have a tendency to shrink into myself when I’m working on a new project, which can sometimes result in hermitting so hard, I become sad. Not this year! I’ve got a schedule in which I wake up early and work until it’s time to walk some dogs, then I come back home and work again until it’s time to go to film club, record a podcast, or watch TV with friends.

I’ve become a dragon hoarding over the treasure that is my time. I’m more aware of what fills my well and why certain activities fill my well. I’m also aware of deadlines I’ve set with my new project, and I don’t let other events encroach on those goals and the energy I need to reach them. I’ve never been one to hold regrets, but I wish I could go back in time and teach myself this skill a little earlier in my career. I used to be so fastidious with all events. Yes or No. This or that. If I could go back, I’d tell myself that I can do anything, but I can’t do everything.

Right now, I write books, exercise, and spend as much time with friends and family as I can. My schedule is more packed than it’s ever been, but I feel more whole and fulfilled because I’ve chosen by activities and the people I surround myself with very carefully.

New Project and Artist’s Way

I’ve been working through Artist’s Way with my friend , and it’s been fascinating and revealing. Sometimes we miss a week then recover, and that makes it better because we’re in it together. Right now, we’ve started Week Six, and it was eye-opening about a lot of feelings I’ve been wrestling with on self-worth as a creative.

It’s a big swing from being a teacher to writing books for a career, but I’m grateful for every single day I’m able to make this happen. For me, every day I get to do this is just icing on top of the cake in which I will get to see my book on shelves next year. However, that doesn’t mean what I do isn’t valuable. Writing books, being an author or a creative isn’t silly. It has purpose and meaning, and… it makes me happy. Does it have to be more than that?

With this newfound freedom, I can confidently say that I’ve got a brand new book outlined and ready to go. Y’all, I am obsessed with this idea. I’ve taken all the lessons I’ve learned from , allowed my id list to run wild with every single chapter, and crafted character arcs that make me squeal! I’m just so freaking ready to write it. Fingers crossed that can happen soon!

Leftovers

1. If you’re new here, I co-host a podcast with about the craft of writing and how it’s the best way to find joy and longevity in the publishing industry. It’s called ! We have the best listeners, so give us a listen!

2. I’ll be headed to YALLFest in November (unofficially visiting and having a writing retreat). If you’re also headed there, let me know! I’d love to meet, give you some TTs and HUNGER swag!

3. I’m still talking long walks and taking photos! They’ve become part of my daily rituals, and I don’t feel at peace until I’ve taken a walk.

4. I’ve picked up The Five: The Untold Lives of the Women Killed by Jack the Ripper as my fall syllabus because I’m obsessed with advancements made in forensics as well as the morality of true crime. Like many youths (maybe??? are there others???), I was obsessed with learning everything I could about Jack the Ripper, convinced I could solve the crime. However, I knew next to nothing about his victims. This book is so enlightening about the women, the living conditions they faced, and the experiences that brought them to Whitechapel.

Thanks for joining me for a chat and a drink!

Anna

With reassurance from my husband and a few hours sleep, I realized I am not what my anxiety tells me I am. However, those thoughts are signals, and I’ve been learning to listen. Why do I feel self-absorbed? Why do I feel socially off? Is there an underlying cause or growth I’m wrestling with?

Having a book published is the biggest dream of my life come true. I’ve never worked harder for anything in my life. Ever. With debut year around the corner and edits entirely finished, there’s swaths of time in an arena I’m not used to. My actual job is to write another one, and another one. I am living my dream, but my dream cannot be all that I am. Weighing my self-worth in likes, Goodreads adds, or preorders isn’t sustainable or healthy. I’m positive this is one of a few causes for my feeling self-absorbed. I literally have been living in the book world for months, and it’s wonderful and slightly suffocating. Solution? Learning something new. That’s right, friends. We’re doing a fall curriculum. I’m in the process of solidifying my two studies for fall, and I’ll report back.

Another cause came in the form of a sucker punch from Week 5 of The Artist’s Way. Cameron talks about the Virtue Trap. It’s the need to rise above our human nature and be good. We ignore our needs because we feel like we have to be of service to anyone at anytime.

Background Time: I grew up with a caring family. The kind that would inwardly panic when I brought friends home for supper, then find a way to stretch a meal for an extra mouth or two. The kind that would delay their own plans for the sake of others. The kind that would give anything at anytime for anyone.

Therapy helped me see how unhealthy I twisted this raising. I’d learned to equate people’s approval for me as a measure of goodness. If I helped anyone and everyone at any time, they would like me, and I would be a good person. A therapist asked me, “What is a good person anyway?” When I described what I considered to be “good”, she asked if I checked those boxes. I did. Then why didn’t I feel good?

According to Cameron, I’d learned to rely on others to feel confident. She suggests that through Artist’s Way, “we are learning to give up idolatry—the worshipped dependency on any person, place, or thing. Instead, we place our dependency on the source itself.” The source is creativity, God, nature, or any higher power you believe in. For me, it’s creativity and the crackling energy that allows me to connect with others through words. That creativity is within me, and I think these last few months have been a shift from serving my community in an extroverted, draining, and soul-filling way to serving it in a quieter, self-reflective, and solitary way.

This feels selfish.

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I went from being a teacher, one of the most under-appreciated careers in the country, to being an artist. Like… What the hell was I doing with my life and who the hell was I to celebrate anything happening for me? This is the Virtue Trap. Previously, my self-worth had come from going above and beyond in the classroom, in serving students and coworkers until I was exhausted. I collapsed on the couch at the end of the day, too tired to write, and convinced myself I was fine because I was a good person.

I was.

I still am.

The only change is where my self-worth comes from. I still have coffee chats with previous students, I support my friends in their endeavors, and I reach out more than I ever have in my life all because I want to.

What I’m trying to get at is that there are growing pains when building confidence. There is a shift from who you used to be who you are becoming, and the little voice in your head will try and drag you back to the safest version of yourself, the one you’ve always been.

Do not listen. Instead, ask why the voice feels that way then use that information to step boldly into the future. I say this as I take tiny, baby steps into whoever this new season of life.

Debut Updates

As someone who diminishes good things happening in my life, I want to try and embrace some milestones in my corner of the world.

1. ALL WE HUNGER FOR is on NetGalley now! Also, it’s in the top 10 of most requested books for Young Adult? Also, it’s got great company with fellow debut Gwenyth Reitz’s YOU’RE DEAD TO ME REED WALKER?!

2. HUNGER is officially getting an audiobook, and the ten-year-old version of me listening to Sue Grafton novels in the car with my mom is SCREAMING. H is for HUNGER, babes!

3. Folks at a big meeting read and talked about my book and they liked it. Like… really liked it. What is this life?!

Author Corner

I want to support works by other authors, whether that be books, Substacks, or just social media presences that make me feel at home.

1. S.Z. Ahmed is one of the kindest, smartest people I know. Her posts on Substack have made me feel so seen.

2. Jill Tew is one of the hardest working people I know in publishing, and she is the definition of worth ethic, big dreaming, and making shit happen for yourself. You can read her newest work, MELEE, on Substack, but I also suggest following her so you can keep up with the fact that JORDAN FISCHER will be NARRATING PART OF HER YA DYSTOPIAN NOVEL. WHAT?!

3. My podcast co-host and friend Lyssa Mia Smith has ascended to a new level of creativity, and I think you should be watching her journey.

Leftovers

1. I am, once again, deeply obsessed with Hannibal. This time around, I’m dissecting and devouring (cannibal humor) why I can’t stop watching, and I’m adding things to my id list. No, it’s not cannibalism. Everyone calm down.

2. GBBO is back, and I am alive again. Every batch of bakers is better than the last, and these are so gentle and silly.

3. A new season of Taskmaster just dropped, and if you need a good giggle as the strangest group of British weirdo comedians do silly tasks for points, give it a watch. Episodes are free on YouTube.

4. I organized my author email into folders. Please clap.

5. I cut my hair too short and gave myself a weird mullet bang situation. It’s cute with my hair up, so I’ll be rocking a bun or a half-up do for the next few weeks.

6. Photography continues to bring me immense joy.

Until next time,

Anna

I picked up two books: The Artist’s Way and Doom and Bloom. I’ve been reading them slowly, taking notes like its homework because it is. I’m forcing myself to take a class of my own design, and I chose two anchor texts that embrace using fear and anxiety as directions meant to be listened in order to course correct your life.

In Doom and Bloom, author Campbell Walker (a.ka. Struthless from YouTube), presents the idea that we are made of three parts. Oxygen, which is your attention and what you pay attention to; fuel, which is your state of mind at any given moment; and heat, which is Doom culture, or the assault of the negative from online spaces. If you only pay attention to negative things and you are in a bitter headspace, you will erupt in heat and heat is destructive. It puts destructive ideas, concepts, and interactions into the world.

Walker doesn’t suggest putting on rose-colored glasses and ignoring major problems in the world or your community. He’s not that kind of dude. What he suggests is to determine the difference between communities and spaces that channel the negative in the world and create good. They use the Doom to Bloom, so to speak.

I instantly thought of social media. We’re all aware that social media and most news outlets work to devour as much of your attention as possible because your attention is money, and what sells? Bad news. Arguments. Divisive phrasing. All out keyboard warrior brawls. Campbell says that “when people around you fight and complain, you inhale their second hand-hand-smoke.” It doesn’t matter if you scroll past the “If you don’t know about THIS NEW THING in the world, then you’re not paying attention.” You breathed that smoke and now doubt creeps in. Are you a bad person for not knowing about this thing? Should you know about this thing?

It’s the same thing with bookish community drama. I am not Writing Community Santa Clause. I do not have a list of every author in the world, and I cannot check them off as a good or bad egg nor am I responsible for that shit. Some online spaces have a way of convincing you that you need to be aware of every situation because they’ve fallen prey to divisive thinking. Campbell calls the internet “an ideal battleground for clashing ideologies” and he says those fights are “fought in unforgiving language that often seeks to bolster the author more than educate the reader.”

Friends, I hope you breathed as deeply as I did when I first read that. It was like coming home to a thought that had nestled itself in the heart of my anxiety. Our job as creators, as people with fears and limits, is to identify people and communities that bolster our creativity rather than seek to destroy it. Campbell would argue that CEOs of social media apps encourage people to create content that captures their audience, and that is usually through divisive claims and language that inhibits our creativity, posts that scream “PAY ATTENTION TO ME!”

There are more things I’d like to say about social media as a conglomerate, but I don’t think I can handle that topic in a delicate way. Not right now. Maybe someday.

But Campbell’s thoughts on social media clicked when I read an innocuous little line in The Artist’s Way: “Art requires a safe hatchery.” From the five people we spend the most time with to the digital living rooms we crash in with friends, our environments need to make us feel safe, confident, and loved. We need to be able to try new things without the fear of being condemned or shamed. We need people who help push us toward being our best selves, even if that means saying things that help us grow.

This isn’t a free pass for bad behavior. Judgment and critique are two very different things. An argument and a discussion are two very different things. Do not get them confused.

I recently had a conversation with my agent in which I had an idea on how publishing could support debut authors more. It was radical and ill-conceived. My agent took the idea in, quietly thought it over, then responded with a counter argument I hadn’t considered. I was humbled. Quickly. In their kind, thoughtful response, I realized I hadn’t considered the issue from enough angles to make a truly informed opinion.

My agent didn’t yell. Didn’t condemn me. Didn’t ruin my career. They knew my heart, saw an opportunity to further the conversation, and stated their opinion. I knew their heart, saw an opportunity to learn, and listened. Growth happened that day because my agent wanted to teach me, not destroy me. My agent is part of my safe hatchery. My friends are part of my safe hatchery. I can bring them words, new craft concepts, and discussions about the writing community and know I will be heard, loved, and respected enough to be told their honest thoughts—even if those critiques hurt in the moment.

Online spaces generally do not encourage growth. They encourage the razing of the earth because, as Campbell suggested, the internet is a battleground, and wars have winners and losers.

I spent the last two months in a pit of anxiety because I was ingesting so much second-hand-smoke. I wasn’t focused on the intelligent, kind, and supportive friends in my corner. I pulled away from the folks who’d always been there. I sank deeper and deeper into bemoaning the fact that I wasn’t a version of myself social media found palatable when in reality . . . I already was. I co-host a writing podcast geared toward curiosity and learning. I support my fellow creators by reposting their content and hyping them up as much as I can. I try to learn from every opportunity and put goodness into the world. Who gives a flying flip if I look a certain way or create the newest social media trend with the bulky font? It won’t move the needle for my book, and it will only move the needle of my happiness backward.

All this to say, I hope you design a safe hatchery for your creativity. I hope it has a comfy little bed with a warm little light, maybe a tiny rocking chair and a little, rickety side table for your beverage of choice. When you open the door, I hope you invite in only the people who make you a better person, the kind of people who refill your well and grind their knuckles into your hair like an older sibling who razzes you . . . but with love.

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Leftovers

Calling this section leftovers because these essay posts feel heavy, and I want a place to shout about all the little things leftover in my head that I want to talk about.

1. What I’m Reading: I’m currently reading a manuscript for a wonderful friend. This week is a bit heavy on the workload, but I plan to pick up some spooky reads some folks recommended. More later.

2. What I’m Watching: Dark on Netflix has been a twisty trip. I have no idea what’s going on, but I love it. The atmosphere of a very small, depressed town in Germany during the fall is my everything. Also, Great British Bake Off just started, so you could say I’m alive again.

3. Current Non-Writing Projects: In order to feed my inner artist, I’ve picked up photography again. During my daily walks, I try and keep an eye out for beautiful things, and I’ve been gently posting them here as notes on Substack.

4. What I’m Baking: I tried making cardamom buns, but they turned out super flat and all the butter melted out of them in the over. Also, I’m pretty sure I put coriander in the filling on accident. Woops.

5. HUNGER Updates: From what I understand, HUNGER could be potentially heading to NetGalley sometime in the next month or two, sooooooooooo . . . that’s a thing! Also, it’s been remarkable to see how many people in my hometown are supportive of me and this endeavor. Releasing a book, I’m beginning to realize, is a collective joy we can all celebrate, and I am READY to party. Finally, I made these bookmarks. I repeat- I MADE THEM! As I told a friend, gRapHiC dEsIgN iS mY pAsSiOn. For real, though? It took me forever.

   

I think that about wraps it up! Thanks for being here, friends.

Cheers,
Anna

But I do have TWO beautiful joys to share with you. Joys I’m beyond grateful for.

First, I have a Fierce Reads page. Me. Anna Mercier from a small town. Me. Anna Mercier who still has no idea what she wants to be when she grows up. Me. Anna Mercier who bee-lined to the Fierce Reads booth when she attended YALLFest for the first time. All my favorite books sat beneath that tent. Now I have a page with my picture. My bio. My book. Also, in my author photo I hold a bound version of the first book I ever wrote. It was an anniversary present from my husband who believed in me fiercely (get it?!) even when I was stumbling around with notebooks and half-baked ideas.

Second, you may notice on that link something new added to ALL WE HUNGER FOR. That’s right!!! SHE HAS SPRAYED EDGES! LOOK AT HER! JUST. LOOK. AT. HER. The designer, Meg Sayre, and artist, Sonia Lai, have made such an impact on my debut year by designing something so beautiful. Nik and Elara are truly going to set bookshelves on fire next June 23rd, 2026.

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The premise and how I delivered on HUNGER is what caught my agent and, later, my editor. Now that I’m flirting with new ideas, I’ve learned how important it is to have an opening that grips me, something that makes me excited to keep going and chase a project to the end. That same excitement can keep readers turning the page. But how?

Enter the world-wide phenomenon of Squid Game. It took me three tries to make it past episode one because I am such a soft-hearted fool. I struggle to get through any art that depicts such raw connections to the human experience mixed with hyperviolence. I was the kind of kid who stopped Disney movies after the peaceful moments: Belle and the Beast dancing, Jasmine and Aladdin on a magic carpet ride, Little Mermaid riding in a boat with Eric . . . I knew, even at the ripe age of 10, that the dark night was coming, and I hated to see people hurt.

All this to say, I finally found the strength to watch the pilot again, and I was in awe. It’s the best pilot of a show I’ve ever seen. Fight me. No, really. If you disagree, head down to the comments and tell me of another pilot. I want to learn! 💗

I know that TV and novels are entirely different mediums, but we can learn from all mediums. Therefore, I humbly submit my essay . . .

Why does Squid Game have the best opening?

For those of you unfamiliar with the premise, Squid Game centers on a group of desperate, indebted people who enter a deadly game in the hopes of earning big money. Originally, I thought the show was just about gratuitous violence for the sake of gratuitous violence. Y’all, I was so damn wrong. The show is about so much more than that. Violence is a major factor, with several difficult to watch scenes, but it becomes a tool the writers use to conduct a freaking symphony about socio-economic divides, the human experience, and greed.

That symphony begins with my favorite part of writing . . . character.

Likeable is out. Relatable is in.

The episode begins with the main character, Gi-Hun, an absolute loser who wrings money from his aging mother like a tattered rag. The show makes sure you know that he SUCKS! (I love him, he’s my idol, watch the rest of the show). Today is his daughter’s birthday, and his mother gives him money for a present and a nice dinner. For Gi-Hun, the money isn’t enough! He’s whiny and selfish to a childlike degree, and steals his mother’s bank card. When it comes to guessing her PIN, he thinks it could be her birthday . . . BUT HE CAN’T REMEMBER IT.

After he successful guesses (it’s actually his daughter’s birthday because his mother puts more stock in her granddaughter than her actual son), he gambles the money at a horse race, giving us a glimpse into his addiction. He loses, then wins BIG. It’s at this point we learn Gi-Hun is in debt to a very dangerous man who reduces Gi-Hun to a sniveling worm on the floor of a gross bathroom. Gi-Hun is so cowardly, that he, without question, signs a document that gives the collector the right to cut out his organs as payment if Gi-Hun doesn’t square up. IN HIS OWN BLOOD.

In the first ten minutes, you realize that Gi-Hun is an immature and irresponsible coward. It earns him the right of being called a loser. Why the hell would you follow a show about this protagonist?!

Because Gi-Hun isn’t a flat character.

He’s deeply relatable.

The moment he wins big at the race track, what does he do with the money? He doesn’t spend it on himself in any capacity. First, he gives 10,000 won to the cashier as a tip. Next, he calls his daughter to get her excited for her birthday. It’s here we learn that Gi-Hun, for all his faults, is a good man at heart—or he wants to be. When he’s being chased by the debt collectors, he knocks someone down. Instead of running to save his life, he stops and checks on them. Later, when he’s headed home, he gives a stray alley cat a bit of his food.

The show utilizes every moment to remind us of how much Gi-Hun needs to grow in order for us to like him, but it keeps us invested in that journey because we see ourselves in him. We all hit rock bottom in some capacity, and we all want the world to see the good in us before anything else. Like Gi-Hun, it’s sometimes easier to get lost in the fantasy (gambling, the promise of tomorrow, etc.) rather than battle the difficulties of today.

While the irony isn’t lost on me that Gi-Hun literally saved the cat, it’s done in such a nuanced and layered way that I absolutely ache for him as he goes through this brutal journey. It leaves me wondering how such a gentle, naïve can survive what’s to come?

Promise of the Premise

The premise is simple: people die competing in gameshow competitions for big cash. It’s a story we’ve seen before in Hunger Games, Battle Royale, and so many others. How does Squid Game separate itself from the others?

Promises.

It promises joy and humor. Gi-Hun is so ridiculously over-the-top that you can’t help but laugh at him and with him, especially when he celebrates winning at a claw machine with a young boy.

It promises violence. Gi-Hun is beaten up and threatened by the debt collector. Later, he’s beaten up by a Squid Game recruiter in a train station.

It promises self-reflection. Gi-Hun sits awkwardly with his mature-for-her-age daughter at a tteokbokki stand which is less grand than the steakhouse her mother and step-father took her to. This hits harder when Gi-Hun learns his daughter will be moving to the states and out of his life forever unless he gets his act together.

All of this happens within the first twenty minutes of the episode. We have all the character elements we need for now. We know Gi-Hun is down on his luck and in desperate need of money, we know he’s addicted to the thrill of chance, and we know he wants to be a good person.

Enter the REAL premise.

If you’ve seen the K-Drama Goblin, then you’ll know why this is a deeply problematic role for this actor to play. If Gong Yoo so hot, why such a bad guy in Squid Game? ANYWAY . . .

While Gi-Hun is at his lowest point, penniless and ashamed, this man offers to play a simple game, ddakji. Winner pays the loser 100,000 won. Gi-Hun doesn’t have this money, but he plays anyway. When he can’t pay his debt, the stranger proposes that he could let Gi-Hun pay up with his body— by being slapped. What results is the most degrading scene I’ve ever seen. (←YouTube link. Other than someone getting the ever-living PISS slapped out of them, this scene is not gory. It’s just degrading AF.)

Even now, my stomach is twisting in knots thinking about how Gi-hun suffers slap after slap after slap from this smug asshole. You watch, begging for him to turn away but knowing he won’t because we learned that he’s addicted to the high gambling gives him.

Eventually, he wins and goes to strike the man only to be stopped and handed the 100,000 won. For a brief moment, there’s a flicker of dismay in Gi-Hun’s eyes, a moment of clarity that maybe gambling his life away (literally) isn’t worth the degradation. This touches on his character arc as well as a promise for the future. The games won’t just be about brutality, but about human nature. They will reduce people to their lowest forms and give them opportunities to rise above.

This train station scene promises what the rest of the episode pays good on. The man offers Gi-Hun a place in a game to win big money, and Gi-Hun accepts. Of course he does. He’s desperate to be a good father, addicted to the chance of money, and reckless with his life to the point of getting in an unmarked van with a weird-o in a red suit with a face mask. Obviously he doesn’t consume enough true crime media.

The show would not have been as powerful if it started inside the games. We needed to be emotionally and thematically ready for the brutal last thirty minutes in which 456 players agree, of their own freewill, to play the first game. Like the train station, they are promised an unfathomable amount of wealth for playing a simple game. However, they don’t remember the brutal caveat of paying with their bodies. They believe a simple game of red light, green light will end with their dismissal. It ends in their deaths.

With over half the field lying in their own blood, the episode ends with an ominous shot of the arena closing on a remote island. Gi-Hun is stranded but alive . . . for how long?

The scene delivers on the premise. It’s violent but showcases the best and worst of humanity, giving us hope for the future as well as dread for Gi-Hun who is still too clueless to make it out of these games alive.

This is why I quit the show the first two times . . . and why I picked it up again. I couldn’t stop thinking about Gi-Hun and his unmitigated joy for life, his kindness to cats and old men with brain tumors, his singular braincell that I feared wouldn’t be enough to save him. The show buried itself in my heart, and now I’m two seasons in and biting my nails every single minute.

Set Up and Pay Off

If you’re familiar with Save the Cat, you’ll know about set up and payoff. It’s similar to promise of the premise in that it establishes something (a character, a symbol, a story thread) and it utilizes that element later in the story. I like to think of these as questions or doors that writers open, but only just a crack. That crack invites question and discovery which keeps an audience engaged.

Gi-Hun’s mother isn’t just older, she’s sick. It’s noticeable from the first episode in the way she hobbles around. Not only is her situation established, but it’s represented by the basket she takes to market. This is used later in the season for one of the most DEVASTATING scenes.

Remember that person Gi-Hun knocked down then checked on? She picked his pocket and caused him to not have enough to pay his debt collector back. Oh, and she’s in the games with him.

Gi-Hun dotes on a big-shot friend who studied at Seoul University and became a successful business man, a friend who never calls home and has moved on from Gi-Hun and this small town. Oh, wait. He’s in the games too.

Remember all the joy Gi-Hun has when he risks everything and wins? Yeah, that doesn’t feel so great anymore when it results in hundreds of deaths.

Closing Thoughts

Squid Game is so much more than I gave it credit for. It’s not a story about violence, but a story about hope in humanity. A story that makes us believe the world can be better, that we can be better.

There’s a line Gi-Hun’s daughter delivers that resonated with me this time around.

“Dad, you can get into fights all you want, just don’t get beaten up.”

She’s fine with Gi-Hun fighting, and I have to believe that’s because she knows her father is good, that he wouldn’t fight unless he absolutely had to. However, she also knows he’s naïve and too trusting to the point people take advantage of him. In order for Gi-Hun to win, in the games and life, he’s going to have to fight, and he’s going to have to stand up for what he believes in. Doing so would mean taking risks and gambling it all for better reasons than money or a quick high.

I’m tearing up because it’s such a nuanced look at the human experience, and it’s done in such an elegant way. We’re told exactly what we need to know, but the writers allow us to experience it ourselves throughout the story. We are gripped by Gi-Hun’s fight to become a better man. We watch the story push him against the wall of his limitations, and we hang on every minute, rooting for him to push back because we know, deep down, he’s a good man.

How do we adapt this to novel writing?

Openings are all about making necessary information as clear as possible.

1. What is your character’s weakness? Show the reader and reflect it in every aspect of their life. Demonstrate the consequences of their weakness and how it makes their status quo miserable.

2. What is your character’s strength? Give the reader a reason to come back. Strengths and weaknesses make characters relatable.

3. Deliver on your premise as early as you can. The Hunger Games don’t actually start until the 50% of the first book, but we glimpse the brutality at Reaping Day. Consider how your premise begins in chapter one.

4. Create setups for you to weave in later. I try and do this during revision because it’s too much for me to think about while drafting.

If I think about episode one of Squid Game as a novel, I think it would end around the 10-15% mark. It’s not quite at the turn into act 2 where the character ACTIVELY makes a choice that pivots the plot, but that’s just me.

Update Corner:

1. HUNGER’s cover reveal was such a magical day, and I sobbed at being surrounded by such love and support. Katie Sue made the most amazing reel and cupcakes for the release. Seriously, please go see them and support her!

2. I saw the jacket wrap for HUNGER, and I want every little detail tattooed on my body. It’s gorgeous in a way I cannot describe. Also, a friend noted that the color scheme of my book is the potential color scheme for Taylor Swift’s new album (orange-ish and turquoise-ish). I’m not above using this for shameless marketing.

3. Duck has been wearing human child tank-tops thanks to his surgery. Please, witness his shame.

   

That’s all for this week!

Bye, friends!
Anna

What follows it a bit sappy, but I wanted to give you a window into what I’m feeling and what allowed this book to be possible for me. <3

Who wants to bet that I’m already crying as I type these first words? If so, you win.

Revealing this cover is a strange, wonderful moment because I started writing HUNGER in July or 2020. It was a chaotic time across the world, and the messy middle of a chaotic time for me personally. Up until that point, the scariest thing I could imagine in life was change because it meant jumping into the unknown, trusting the process, and trusting myself. I sure as hell wasn’t good at any of that. But I made the first change: therapy. Then I made the second change: left a very stressful work environment. Made a third change: left the new and abusive work environment. Made a fourth change… You see where this is going.

When I look back at the five years between starting this book and revealing the cover, I see so much change, and the biggest change I made was to choose joy. As someone with depression/anxiety, I don’t want to be flippant with that statement. In looking at the pictures from the past, there are lots of moments that weren’t joyful. There were days, weeks, and months where it was a battle to get out of bed and put one foot in front of the other. But my trajectory from July 2020 until now has been toward joy.

What was my joy?

1. ♥️Community. There are so many photos from visiting with friends, celebrating marriages, and enjoying meals with family. There’s also a folder on my desktop labeled “Good Writing Memories”, and it’s filled with compliments from CPs, celebrations of their milestones, and little moments along this publishing journey that have reminded me why I love writing.

2. ✏️Learning. In the last five years, I picked up baking and disc golf. I’ve buried myself in learning as much as I can about the writing craft because curiosity is what drives me to keep going and never settle.

3. ✅Saying yes. Taylor Swift spoke straight to my heart when she said “I'm doing good, I'm on some new shit/ Been saying ‘yes’ instead of ‘no.’” In truth, I said no to the things that stole from my creative well. I started listening to my body and trusting the butterflies or the dread, and I used that to make choices that led me in the direction of my dreams. After, I said yes. Yes to inviting friends into my life. Yes to enjoying teaching high school again. Yes to hanging out with friends. Yes to starting a new podcast. Yes to myself who was only starting believe this was possible.

To be clear, getting to this point in my baby publishing career isn’t just joy. It’s luck, and I am incredibly grateful the stars aligned for me to have these moments. However, I do think I wouldn’t have been in those lucky places had I not continually navigated myself toward joy.

And it is with all the joy in my heart that I share with you the cover of my debut novel, ALL WE HUNGER FOR.

⭐🔥SCREEEEEEEAAAAAMMMMMMMIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGG⭐🔥

⭐🔥CRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYIIIIIIINNNNNNNGGG⭐🔥

⭐🔥THROOOOOWWWWIIINNNGGGUUUUUUPPPPPPPPPP⭐🔥

When I tell you that I look at it every day, I’m not lying!!! It’s more than I could’ve ever asked for. Once again, I’m incredibly lucky that the team at Henry Holt had such a stunning plan for HUNGER, and incredibly lucky they hired the wonderfully talented Sonia Lai. I’ve been a fan of her artwork for a while now, and I instantly screamed when they suggested her name. Please, go check her work out and give her a follow!

The cover is a perfect blend of all the things I love: romance, symbolism, and dramatic colors. I’m getting cold chills thinking about how readers will hit a moment in the book when they understand the lavender in the corner and the butterflies in the middle. It’s… it’s a dream, y’all. Just a freaking dream, and I’m incredibly honored to celebrate the team who put so much thought into this design!!!!!!!

I want to thank my editor, Carina, who really made this book shine and has been such an incredible joy to work with. I also want to thank my agent, Michaela Whatnall, who has showed unwavering faith in me and this book, even when I destroyed draft after draft in pursuit of… something! Haha. Wouldn’t be here without them.

Fun News: You can add it on Goodreads or preorder it RIGHT NOW.😱

About the Book: In Anespérer, where magic comes alive through artistic skill, Elara Rousseau knows she'll never be selected for the Objet d’Art. The high-stakes baking competition will elect a new Souverain to join the ruling council, and someone from the slums would never be considered. But when a brooding figure from her past sneaks her into the Objet, Elara has the chance to compete for a better future... as long as no one uncovers her traitorous secret.

Nikolas Dupont will do whatever it takes to impress his powerful father, a Souverain who hasn't officially recognized his son―like handpick a contestant to win and become his father's political pawn. But Elara is more than he bargained for, and she ignites his own subdued passions.

Against all odds, Elara excels and becomes a hero to the city's poor, all while Nik’s faith in his father crumbles and the sparks between them burn brighter. As the competition heats up, Elara and Nik must choose: fight to win the competition and secure a future of safety for them both, or use the power of Elara’s art to spark a revolution.

Trivia: Years ago, when I was attempting to figure out a theme for IG, I asked Kat Korpi what she thought the color pallet was for HUNGER. She sent me the following image. I DID NOT SEND THIS TO MY PUBLISHER. I forgot about this image until I was scrolling a week or so ago. Kat Korpi is a genius!

I won’t wax on forever. Time is, as I said above, precious, and I hope that you leave this post inspired to chase joy in whatever way you can today. Take a deep breath, sit in the sun, journal out your thoughts, or paint your nails. Whatever it takes!

Thank you again for your support all these years. I look forward to many more just screaming and delighting in this journey with you!

Anna