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Elise, Trent, and Mason are the perfect family. Now it’s time to make it official.

Elise walked into her apartment, expecting to hear laughter and yelling as usual, but was surprised to find it awfully quiet. She dropped her things at the door, kicked her shoes off, and walked into the kitchen, where she saw a note on the fridge from John.

Good evening, beautiful. Our son got an A on his spelling quiz, so I took him out for ice cream. We should be back shortly with your favorite. Love you :)

Elise’s heart fluttered at Trent referring to Mason as their son. It was evident that she was making the right decision by letting him adopt Mason. She then remembered the adoption papers in her bag and knew she needed to hide them before the two of them got home.

She walked back over to her purse and hid them in the bottom drawer of her desk. Just as she was closing the drawer, she heard a key in the lock. She smiled, excited to see her boys.

Trent opened the door, letting Mason walk in first, who was surprised to see his mom home before bedtime.

“Mommy! I got an A and ice cream!” He said while running to hug her.

Elise squatted down to his level and opened her arms up to hug him back. “I saw! I am so proud of you, my smart boy.” She kissed his forehead before pulling away. “So so proud.” She said with a genuine smile. She was constantly worried about Mason’s progress because of the first few months of his life, but he has overcome every obstacle presented to him.

Elise had adopted Mason when he was about six months old. He had spent the first months of his life in a foster home after his mother had surrendered him to a fire station.

She was always worried that the lack of care and attention in those crucial first months would have long-lasting effects on him, but she knew now that it was nothing this 5-year-old standing in front of her couldn’t do.

“How was your day?” Mason asked his mom, an inquisitive look in his eyes, while bouncing in place from the sugar high he got from the ice cream.

“Oh, I had a great day.” She said, standing up, but maintaining eye contact with him. “It got even better because I can spend some time with my boys before bed.” She glanced over at Trent, who had just finished putting her ice cream away. “Thank you, Trent.”

“Of course.” He said with a smile, then leaned over to kiss her forehead.

“How was your day?” Elise directed the same question to Trent.

“It’s better now that I see you.” He said with a smile. For the last couple of weeks, Elise had been working on a big case, so Trent would already be asleep when she got home, and they would only have a few moments in the morning before it was time for work again. He was happy to spend some quality time with Elise. “We’ll talk about the rest of it later.”

She nodded, understanding. They were both detectives, Elise in Cybercrime and Trent in Internal Affairs. Because of their careers, they never went into detail about their day in front of Mason.

“Well, did you guys have dinner first or just have ice cream to eat?” She asked with her signature eyebrow raise, but she knew the answer already.

Mason looked over at Trent for help with this question. Trent made him promise not to tell Elise that they didn’t eat real food, but he couldn’t lie to his mom.

Trent knew he had messed up and quickly opted for damage control. “You know, you look really beautiful today.”

Elise tried to keep a straight face, but she should have known better. The two of them were two peas in a pod, and if Elise wasn’t around enforcing the rules, they weren’t going to follow them. She just shook her head. “You two are never going to learn. So because of that, you guys will be having brown rice and Brussels sprouts tonight.”

“Mom!”

“Oh, c’mon, babe.”

She shook her head and stood her ground. “I don’t want to hear it.” She looked over to Trent. “And you will be cooking.” She tried her hardest to hide her laugh because of both of them pouting. It was adorable and almost made them look like twins, despite having no relation.

“I can’t wait to taste your delicious cooking.” She said as she walked down the hallway to their bedroom to shower.

“You got us in trouble!” Mason said, crossing his arms and glaring at Trent. The pout quickly turned into a frown.

Trent chuckled as he started to pull out pans to prepare for dinner. This was a shared chore in their household. When Elise was home earlier enough to cook, she would handle dinner and vice versa. “Ice cream was your idea, remember?”

“You could’ve said no,” Mason said with a shrug.

Trent turned to look at Mason with a loving and soft glance on his face. How could he ever deny this boy anything? He was one of the best things that ever happened to him, and whatever Mason wanted, Trent would make sure he could have it. Even if that was ice cream before dinner. “You want me to say no to ice cream next time?”

Mason’s eyes widened like Trent had three heads. His young brain couldn’t even fathom a world where Trent would tell him no to ice cream. “Noooooo! We should always get ice cream.”

Trent chuckled a bit at the boy’s reaction. “I thought so. Now, come wash your hands so you can help me cook.”

“Yes, sir.”

Trent and Elise walked into their bedroom after putting Mason to bed. Elise loved being home in time to do his bedtime routine. It was one of the few moments she was guaranteed to spend with him.

Trent usually lets her take the lead with bath and bedtime, because he spends the most time with Mason out of the two of them. However, he still liked to be part of the bedtime routine because he loved the few moments when the three of them could be together as a family.

The couple climbed into bed, and Elise immediately snuggled into Trent’s side with a content smile on her face. “It’s been so long since we’ve been able to do this.”

Despite spending most of her day in front of a computer, Elise’s hours were unpredictable because crime stopped for no one.

Trent, on the other hand, was home by 6 PM on most days, even though cops committing crimes seemed nonstop as well.

“I know,” Trent said as he wrapped his arm around her shoulders and brought her closer to him.

“So, how was your day, really?” She asked again, remembering their earlier conversation.

He sighed. He had been dreading telling her this news all day, but he couldn’t hide it from her. “Promise not to get mad.” As soon as he said the words, he felt her tense in his embrace. “I said, don’t get mad.” He said with a slight smirk on his face.

“Sorry, but usually when someone says that, it’s followed by something that is going to make me mad.” The worst-case scenarios started to run through her mind, and if Trent didn’t tell her the news soon, she was going to overthink herself into having an anxiety attack.

“I have to go to Philly for the weekend.” He stated plainly.

Elise immediately sat up and turned her body so she could look at him, with a slight annoyance on her face. “Trent, no. It’s Father’s Day weekend! I’ve been planning this for months.” Of course, he could get his gifts later, but she managed to get the weekend off and brought tickets to see that Marvel movie he and Mason had been going on and on about for months. There was no way his job was going to ruin this.

Trent was very surprised she had anything planned for Father’s Day. He didn’t really expect anything. It would be the first Father’s Day that they spent together as a couple, but he didn’t need her to do anything for him. “Look, I don’t want to go either, but we got a lead on our case. Our lead just so happens to be in prison, so we have to go there.”

“So, go tomorrow. Why wait four days? Don’t give him time to change his mind about talking to you guys or worse, someone else getting to him.”

Trent paused for a moment. “Well, yeah. You have a point. I just thought the weekend would be better because of Mason.” He shrugged. Since Trent had come into Elise’s life, he had been helping her tremendously with Mason.

Since his schedule was pretty set during the week and he had weekends off, Paige was demoted from full-time nanny to part-time babysitter.

Trent actually used to be in the field more, but when he started dating Elise, he wanted to help her with Mason, so he volunteered to leave the field to spend his days doing interviews and paperwork.

He was happy with his decision because he got to be the family man he had always dreamed of while still having the career he loved.

Elise wanted to be mad at him, but she couldn’t. Mason was always his first priority, and it made her so happy. “I’m sure Paige misses Mason, and I can call your mom to help if I really need it, but you need to be back from Philly by Sunday morning at the latest, or so help me, God...” She trailed off as Trent started to laugh at her.

Trent couldn’t help but laugh, but it also meant a lot to him that Elise had put so much time and energy into Father’s Day. “Yes, Lieutenant. Let me call Chad and see if he’s okay with leaving tomorrow afternoon.” He grabbed his phone from the nightstand and called his partner.

Chad answered on the second ring. “Hey, man. I was just about to call you. Wifey is not happy about this weekend trip.”

Trent slightly smiled. “Yeah, neither is mine, especially because it’s Father’s Day. She suggested we leave tomorrow.”

Chad’s eyes lit up. “Perfect, man! Michael has his first soccer game Saturday, and I was told I had to be there, or I was a dead man walking.”

Trent let out a sigh of relief, but smiled. “Our ladies gotta meet one day. I’ll see you tomorrow.” He hung up the phone and looked over at Elise. “Your weekend plans are saved.” He leaned over and kissed her forehead. “Aren’t you going to miss me, though?” He asked with an arrogant smirk.

She leaned back into his side before she answered. “Yes, but I’d rather have you here for Father’s Day, and I know Mason would too.” She wanted to keep the fact that she had Father’s Day plans a complete surprise, but this work trip just threw a big wrench into that.

Now he was intrigued. Elise obviously had something big planned up her sleeve, and he was anxious to find out, especially if Mason was involved. “You’re right. We gotta go on a double date with Chad and his wife sometime.” He said with a smile.

“I would love to meet the woman who puts up with Chad.” She said in an amusing tone.

Chad and Trent were almost identical. Where one slacked, the other picked up. Their personalities, humor, and lifestyles were all parallel. The only difference is that Trent had a little more street and book smarts than Chad, and has had to save Chad’s ass more times than he would like to admit.

Elise has told Trent that maybe he should ask for a new partner, but Trent loved working with Chad and couldn’t handle working his job without him.

“I still don’t know how he bagged her.”

Elise smirked. “The same way you got me.” She said, looking up at him.

“Ah, so good looks, sex, and charm?” Trent asked with a big grin on his face.

Elise couldn’t help but laugh. “In your dreams, Hughes.” But he was right. Those were the first things that attracted her to him, but what made her stay was how funny, caring, and patient he was. And most importantly, how he treated Mason.

“You know you love me.” He said, pushing her on her back and pinning her to the bed.

She raised a brow and licked her lips before she spoke. “You are not getting laid tonight. You gave our son ice cream before dinner. You are most definitely in the doghouse.” She said, trying to hide her smile.

Trent smacked his lips. “Oh, c’mon-” Then it hit him. “Wait, did you just say our son?” Of course, Trent said it here and there, but this was the first time he had ever heard Elise refer to Mason as theirs.

“Yeah, Trent. Our son.” She said with a huge smile on her face. She couldn’t believe she actually had the life she had spent so long dreaming of. Even if Trent’s adoption of Mason didn’t go through, it was clear that Trent did not need a piece of paper to tell him if he was a father.

“Can we call Trent before I go to sleep?” Mason asked Elise as she was putting him to bed.

She smiled at the question. “Yes, of course. I’m sure he would love to hear from you.” Elise grabbed her phone from her back pocket and called Trent, hoping that he wouldn’t be too busy to at least say goodnight to Mason.

“Hey, Lis.” He answered with a small smile on his face.

“Hey, Trent.” She said being instantly comforted at the sound of his voice. “Mason wants to say goodnight. Are you busy?”

Trent’s face lit up hearing the real reason she was calling. Of course, he missed Elise and wanted to talk to her, but he was missing Mason even more. “No, I’m never too busy. Put him on.” Trent said with a smile as he sat up in his bed.

Elise could hear the excitement in his voice, and it made her heart flutter. She handed the phone over to Mason.

“Hi, Trent! When are you coming home?”

“Hopefully tomorrow night. Do you miss me?”

“Yes!” Mason nearly screamed. “Mommy hasn’t played video games with me, and she won’t let me have ice cream.” There was a hint of sadness to his voice, even with the huge smile on his face.

Elise just laughed and shook her head. Trent was clearly the fun parent, and Elise was stuck as the one who had to enforce the rules, but she knew Mason would appreciate it when he got older.

“Well, when I get back home, that’s going to be all over with,”

That was music to Mason’s ears. “Yay! I love you, Trent.”

“I love you, too, kid. Sleep tight.”

“Don’t let the bed bugs bite.” Mason finished the saying before handing the phone back to Elise.

Elise grabbed the phone from Mason. “Don’t hang up yet.” She said quickly to Trent. “Goodnight, my sweet boy. I love you.” Elise kissed Mason’s forehead before she walked out of his bedroom and closed the door behind her. “Hi, there.” She said to Trent over the phone.

“I said I wasn’t too busy for Mason. You, Ms. Richardson, need to make an appointment.” Trent said, grinning.

She smacked her lips. “Oh, shut up.” She said as she walked into their bedroom. “And to think I actually miss you.”

“I miss you, too, Lis. However, you have to let our son eat ice cream every once in a while.”

She rolled her eyes. “He has to eat healthy.”

“Hello, pot, it’s kettle,” Trent said, making fun of Elise’s unhealthy eating habits. “You don’t have three healthy, balanced meals a day.”

“But I’m the parent. He’s supposed to do as I say, not as I do.” Trent did have a point, but she wanted Mason to do things better than she did.

“And as Mason’s other parent, I say that he gets to eat ice cream.” Trent shot back with a bit of seriousness in his tone. He knew Elise was overprotective of Mason because of his life before she adopted him, but she couldn’t be a helicopter parent forever.

Elise was caught off guard by his statement and the tone he had used with her. She had nothing to say in response. Trent did let her lead the way on parenting decisions for Mason, and he was always happy to offer advice when she asked. But now, since she was allowing him to adopt Mason, she would have to get used to always taking his opinion into account.

“I’m going to take your silence as a win.” He said with a smirk.

She shrugged her shoulders and let out a defeated sigh. “You are his other parent, and have a say in what he can or can’t do, so I will give you that. As for the ice cream situation, only once a week.”

Over the last two weeks, Elise had suddenly started referring to him as Mason’s dad and letting him step up to the plate more, and he began to wonder if it had anything to do with Father’s Day coming up. “Twice a week, and we have a deal.”

She groaned. “Fine, but only after dinner, Hughes.”

He laughed. “Yes, ma’am.”

“Mommy, why don’t I have a daddy?” Mason asked Elise as they were sitting on the couch watching TV, waiting for Trent to get home.

Elise inhaled sharply at the question. She knew this day would come. It would be this conversation and then the conversation about his adoption. However, she thought that because of the relationship Mason and Trent had, she had successfully avoided the first conversation. “Well, not all families have a mom and a dad. Some people only have a mom, or they only have a dad. Some people also have two moms or two dads.” She said, hoping that would kill his curiosity. “Where did that come from?”

Mason was quiet for a moment before he spoke again. “Miss Liz had us make things for our dads in class today, but since I don’t have one, I just made something for Trent.” His voice softened and trailed off at the end because all he wanted was a dad, and he didn’t understand why he didn’t have one, but other people did. “She said dads help with homework and cook and plays with us all the time. Trent does that with me, so maybe he can be my dad.”

Elise’s eyes immediately filled with tears, hearing this. She wanted to talk to Mason about Trent being his dad, but this was all the confirmation she needed. It was obvious the three of them belonged together. “I think Trent would love to be your day. We should ask him on Sunday.”

Mason’s eyes lit up, and he smiled at hearing the fact that Trent could be his dad. “Why wait?” He said, nearly jumping off the couch.

Elise could only chuckle at his excitement. “Well, Sunday is Father’s Day, and I think asking him on that day will make him extremely happy. Plus, I was going to ask him to be your dad, also.”

“You were?” He asked, surprised.

She nodded. “I think he’s a really good dad.”

Mason smiled and leaned back into Elise’s side. “Me too.”

xxxx

It was about twenty minutes later when Trent walked into the apartment. Mason jumped off the couch when he heard the door open. “Trent!” He nearly screamed.

Elise knew that if any of her neighbors were sleeping, they were definitely awake now.

“Oh, man, did I miss you, buddy,” Trent said while scooping Mason up into his arms and hugging him tight.

“I missed you the mostest,” Mason said, squeezing Trent tighter.

Elise cleared her throat, but had a small smile on her face.

Trent looked up at her and laughed before he put Mason down. “I missed you, too, beautiful.” He said, then walked over to her and gave her a light kiss on the lips.

“Can we play video games, da-Trent?” Mason corrected himself. His caramel skin was turning red with embarrassment because he was supposed to be keeping a secret until Sunday.

Both Trent and Elise glared at each other, hearing the almost slip up. They had previously talked about what to do if Trent ever called Trent “dad”. Their plan was not to make it a big deal or bring attention to it until Mason did.

Because of the conversation they just had, Elise was not surprised at the slip-up, but more surprised at how quickly he corrected himself.

Trent, on the other hand, couldn’t hide the look of delight and surprise on his face.

“How about we let Trent get some rest, and we can play with him tomorrow?”

Trent was exhausted, but he couldn’t say no to Mason now or ever. “It’s fine, Lis. I made Chad do the drive back.” He looked over at Mason. “Get everything set up while I take a shower.”

“Okay!” Mason ran over to the TV and started pulling out the games and setting up the console.

Elise wrapped her arms around Trent’s waist and brought him closer to her. “You spoil him.” She said, looking up at him with a contented smile.

“I have no regrets about it.” He said with an equally content smile on his face.

Elise lay awake in bed waiting for 7 AM to come. She could barely sleep at all last night because of her excitement for Father’s Day. This was the first year she was ever excited for the holiday since she grew up without a father. Even when she adopted Mason, the day wasn’t celebrated or talked about because she was a single mom. Now that Trent was around and was the perfect dad for Mason, she couldn’t help herself.

“I can’t believe you didn’t sleep last night,” Trent grumbled into the pillow. Trent had a sixth sense about Elise sleeping. His sleeping pattern had started to match hers, just so he knew if he needed to be awake or not. Even though she was almost always completely still when she was awake, he could never sleep if she didn’t.

Elise looked over at his body, which didn’t even move an inch when he spoke, and raised a brow. “How did you know?’

He wasn’t going to tell her he’d basically been up all night with her, because then she would feel bad. “I know you, Lis.” He said, now turning his head to look at her. “Besides, when you’re really sleeping, you cuddle up into my side.” He said with a slight smirk on his face.

She smiled because he was right. She always slept best with his arms wrapped around her. “I feel like a kid on Christmas.” She shyly confessed. “I’m so excited for today that I couldn’t sleep.”

“Lis, what are you doing today?” He said, now shifting his entire body to look at her. She didn’t have to go all out for him. A card and a small gift would have meant the world to him, but now it seems like he will be getting way more than that.

“Spoiling the best father in the world.” She said before she leaned over and kissed him sweetly on the lips. She pulled away with a smile before slightly grazing the stubble on his jawline with her hand. “I love you, Trent. Happy Father’s Day.”

Trent felt himself get emotional, and the day had just started. Knowing Elise, he had a feeling this wouldn’t be the last time he felt this way today. “I love you, too, Lis.”

“Good. Now you lay here and relax while our son and I fix you breakfast.” She said, grinning and getting out of bed.

“I can get used to the sound of that.” He said, watching her walk out of the bedroom.

Before Elise could even get to Mason’s bedroom, she saw that his door was open and heard something in the kitchen. She changed paths to go into the kitchen and couldn’t help but smile when she saw Mason pulling out pots and pans. “What are you doing, love?”

Mason jumped at the sound of her voice. “You said we had to cook Trent breakfast.” He said innocently.

“Yes, I said we. You can’t do it by yourself, sweetheart.” She said, walking towards the refrigerator and grabbing eggs and butter. “What were you planning to make him?”

“Chocolate chip pancakes! He loves them.”

Elise grinned. “Yes, he does. Do you want to make bacon for him, also?”

Mason nodded. “Plus, cheesy eggs!”

“Chocolate chip pancakes, bacon, and cheesy eggs, it is.”

“Breakfast in bed, I got to see Spiderman, and then dinner at my favorite restaurant with my mom. Lis, you truly spoiled me.” Trent said to Elise, who was making ice cream sundaes for the three of them. Throughout the day, Elise and Mason kept reminding him how great a dad he was, and he couldn’t believe that the life he had always imagined was actually his.

“Most of the day was Mason’s idea, but we just wanted you to feel special.” She said with a genuine smile. Today was easily one of the best days of her life, and the best was yet to come.

“Yah! I told Mommy we had to go to the movies and see Spidey and that you wanted chocolate chip pancakes.” Mason said proud of himself for knowing exactly what Trent likes.

“You did great planning my day, Mason. I am very happy.” He grazed his knuckles against his cheek softly while he looked at the boy with nothing but love in his eyes. He couldn’t believe he was the father of the most amazing kid in the world.

Elise handed them their bowls of ice cream. “I’ll be right back, boys.” She walked over to her desk and grabbed the adoption papers from the bottom drawer. She walked back to the bar where Trent and Mason were sitting. “Mason, remember that super secret, important question you wanted to ask Trent? I think now is the perfect time.”

Trent looked between the two of them, confused as to what was going on. He had already cried with the handprint and small letter Mason wrote him, and the card Elise gave him. He couldn’t even imagine what else they could do to top that.

Mason’s eyes lit up upon hearing that he could finally ask Trent to be his dad. “Trent, do you want to be my dad?” He said with his voice full of excitement. He was nearly bouncing in his seat, awaiting the answer.

“Yeah, Trent, do you want to be his dad?” Elise said as she handed Trent the adoption papers.

Trent felt his heart stop as he looked down at what Elise had just placed in his hands. “I..” He tried to speak, but his voice cracked. This little boy could hardly wait to ask him, and Elise had gone out to make sure it would be official. “Hell yeah, I want to be your dad,” Trent said with tears falling from his eyes. He grabbed Mason from the chair he was sitting in and wrapped him in his arms so tightly. “I love you.”

“I love you, Daddy Trent,” He said, wrapping his arms around Trent’s neck, hugging him back while having matching tears fall from his eyes.

Elise let out a small sob as she watched Trent hug their son so tightly. She couldn’t recall a time she had ever seen Trent so happy, and she was glad she was part of this moment.

Trent pulled away, smiling, and looked down at Mason. “Hey, kid. Remember that super secret, important question we have to ask mommy? I think now is the perfect time.” Trent smirked as he copied Elise from earlier.

Now, it was Elise’s turn to be confused. “Trent, this is your day.”

“Yeah, I know.” He said, walking away to their bedroom to grab a small black box from a shoe box he’s had hidden for the last three months in the back of their closet. He walked back into the living room, sporting a huge grin, not believing that not only was Mason going to be his legally, but Elise would hopefully be his wife. “Remember your speech?” He asked Mason.

Mason nodded before he looked at Elise. He grabbed her hand and made her turn her back to Trent, just like they practiced. “Mommy, Trent loves you and me very much. He wants to live with us forever, so you have to marry him!”

Elise’s eyes widened as she turned around to face Trent, who was on one knee, holding a small black box that had her dream ring nestled in the black velvet. It was a princess-cut diamond with three smaller diamonds on each side.

“Well, Lis, what do you say? Will you marry me?”

She just nodded while more tears rolled down her face, because she didn’t trust her voice.

“Is that a yes, mommy?” Mason asked innocently.

Elise chuckled. “Yes, yes!” She cradled Trent’s face in her hands and kissed him with all the love she felt for him. She couldn’t believe this was happening, nor that he had been planning this for so long.

“Ewww,” Mason said as he watched them kiss.

They both pulled away from the kiss, laughing at Mason’s reaction. “I love you so much, Trent.” She said, still holding his face in her hands, afraid that if she broke physical contact, she would wake up from this dream.

“I love you, too, Elise, but you haven’t let me put the ring on yet.” He said, chuckling.

“Oh!” She smiled and stepped back, holding out her left hand so he could slip the ring on. “It’s so beautiful.” She said, finally admiring her engagement ring. She looked back up at Trent. “I love it, and I love you.”

“Hey, what about me?” Mason asked, not liking that he was being forgotten in this moment.

Elise picked him up, struggling a bit, and smiled. “I love you the most.” She looked at Trent, who was looking at her and Mason with nothing but love in his eyes. In that moment, she finally felt true peace and happiness.

“We both do, kid,” Trent said, leaning over to kiss Mason on the forehead. This was it. This was the life that Trent had convinced himself he didn’t deserve anymore. He was grateful that Elise never gave up on him and kept pushing him to be the best version of himself. “I don’t know how you’re going to top this next year, Ms. Richardson.” He said jokingly.

She laughed with him. “It’s Mrs. Hughes to you, and I have a few ideas.”

Have the week you deserve!

-Avery 💙

P.S. I love feedback, tell me what you thought about the story in the comments.

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Issue Two of Purpose Magazine is a little late, but I think once you read it, you’ll understand why it was worth the wait.

In this issue, you can expect:

• Book title reveal and full blurb about my upcoming fiction book

• Way to make fitness fun

• Quotes to get you focused

• And a cover story that is going to make you get up and get to work

Without further ado, here’s Purpose Magazine Issue Two:

Read more

Talk Around the Block

I am going on month four of being in Portland and it’s iight. I’ve been trying to be more intentional with going out and trying to make new friends, but it’s lowkey been a challenge. The biggest challenge is that everything costs money, and I’m in between blessings right now.

Secondly, everything is a party or a market. I just wanna chill in a low-stakes situation.

Thirdly, my girlfriend moved to Austin last month, so of course, my love for Portland has decreased tremendously. But I just gotta make it to March, and I’ll be with my boo again (as long as she doesn’t start hating me).

And for those that don’t follow me on social, yes, I’m off the market 🤗 This is my first relationship since my divorce. I’m not gone lie, it’s scary loving again. Like I’m willingly letting someone in and giving them the power to hurt me.

(Bea and Itza are probably the only ones who know the extent of the damage my divorce did to me, and I never want to feel that pain again.)

But Natalie, she’s a breath of fresh air; the personification of the sun. From our first date, I was smitten. She has made it easy to believe in love again. She loves me in all of my craziness, never making me feel bad for being me. Which sounds kinda bare minimum, but if you knew my dating history, you would understand why this is a big deal to me, lol.

Isn’t she lovely 😍

Last update: Your boi has started baking, from scratch. It’s actually not that hard, lol. Granted, the only thing I’ve made so far is that honey cinnamon banana cake, but it’s so gooooooooooooood, I really don’t care about making anything else right now.

Word On The Street

I am committed to becoming a full-time writer. I can’t work for the (white) man anymore. The last couple of weeks have been me laying the foundation for that dream to become a reality.

That looks like taking my newsletter more seriously, posting content consistently, getting my website back up and running, and making my “Quitting Plan.”

My gift will make room for me, and I can’t wait to bring you guys along for the ride.

I’m working on three books, as you know, and will be doing a title reveal in the August Edition of Purpose Magazine. 😊 Make sure you’ve upgraded your subscription so you have access to the upcoming edition.

Subscribe now

For one of the books, I just hit 10k words, and it’s becoming my favorite book that I’m writing. The goal is to have the first draft done by the end of the year, so it can be in your hands next summer.

Block Party Entertainment

What I’ve been watching:

• The Ultimatum

• Futurama

• Bob’s Burgers

What I’ve been reading:

• Cleat Cute (4.5)

• The 7-10 Split (2.5)

• Seven Days in June (4)

• Deliah Green Doesn’t Care (4)

• D'Vaughn and Kris Plan a Wedding (5)

• The Faculty Lounge (3)

• 6 Times We Almost Kissed (And One Time We Did) (4.5)

• As Far As You’ll Take Me (2)

What I’ve been listening to:

• Gonna Be A Lovely Day by Kirk Franklin

• This Is The Day by Fred Hammond

• All Authority by Tasha Cobbs

• War by Charles Jenkins

• Release by Ricky Dillard

• ALIEN SUPERSTAR by Beyoncé

• All I Need Is You by Erica Campbell

• Savior by Faith City Music

• You Will Win by Jekalyn Carr

• It Is So by William McDowell

• Check by FLO

The Link-Up

• Guysssss, we have merch again! This collection is for the weirdos (complimentary) who live in their own world and dance to the beat of their own drum.

• Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way is the last self-help book you’ll ever need. Instead of throwing quotes at you, you’ll get actionable steps to not only discover your purpose in life, but to do it with confidence and ease.

• Feel. Forgive. Forget is my debut poetry collection about being overlooked and underloved. The poems have a central theme: love and heartbreak. Broken into three sections, you learn that while my heart was never whole to begin with, I made sure I gave my all to whoever I was with. The book begins and ends the same way, with me picking up the pieces of my broken heart, ready to love again.

• I’m offering 1:1 Clarity Calls to help you identify your purpose, the obstacles standing in your way, and make your purpose plan for the rest of the year.

Unc Said:

The world is basically ending. Do you want to spend the end of the world not living the life you dream of? This week, reflect on what motivates you. Is it:

• Praise

• Rewards

• The feeling of accomplishment

• Competition

Once you figure out what motivates you, use that to finally stop putting your dreams on hold and get up and do something about it. You already know what you need to do; now it’s time to stop making excuses and just do it.

Helping Hand (A list of crowdfunding requests I come across during the week):

• Let’s help Lena cover expenses while they wait to start their new job

• Let’s help Trey get a place to stay

• Let’s help Karl pay rent

Have the week that you deserve!

-Avery 💙

(Any short stories I share are NOT from my upcoming novels, just characters and storylines I wanted to write about, or had already written.

Trinity was in the kitchen starting dinner while James, her fiancé, was in the shower. It was the first time in a week that they both were off work at the same time. James, a firefighter, and Trinity, a nurse, had schedules that were usually opposite. When they were both at home and could have dinner together, they cherished those moments.

She had just put the lasagna in the oven when there was a knock at the door. She had no idea who it could be since no one said they were coming over. She walked over to the door and almost died when she saw who was standing on the other side. Her heart dropped to her stomach, and her throat became dry. The anger and pain from his ghosting had started to resurface.

Lamar freaking Johnson was standing outside her house. After four years without speaking to or seeing him, he was there. But why? What could he want from her at this point? Why would he decide to show up now? She knew she could only get her answers if she let him in.

She was brought out of her thoughts when he knocked again. “Trin. I know you’re in there.”

Why now? She thought. She was happy; she had finally moved on. She finally had the life that she had prayed for. She mentally prepared herself for whatever was about to happen, then she opened the door.

Lamar looked up from the ground and smiled a little when he saw her. He could tell she had lost weight or was toning up, and she cut her hair again. She looked good. “Hey.” He said plainly, as if no time had passed between the two of them.

She put a hand on her hip. “If someone isn’t dying, I don’t have anything to say to you.” She spat. How dare he just waltz in here like it hadn’t been four years since they last spoke to each other?

He sighed. He knew she was going to be upset, but he didn’t think the anger would still be so fresh. “I just wanted to talk.” He knew he had messed up, but she just gave him a chance to explain himself, and everything would be okay.

“About how you haven’t talked to me in four years? Or how you ignored every text and call from me for six months before you changed your number? I used to have so much to say to you, but you’re not worth it.” She tried to close the door, but he stuck his foot out.

“Trinity,” he pleaded. “Please hear me out.” There was a sadness in his tone and a pleading look in his eyes as he spoke.

She sighed. It was something in his voice that convinced her to let him come in. “You have three minutes.” She allowed him to step into her foyer, but that was it. She was hoping she wouldn’t regret this.

He tried to look behind her, to catch a glimpse of her new life, but she moved into his line of sight and spoke.

“How did you even find me?” She asked, breaking him out of his trance.

He chuckled nervously. This was going to piss her off more. “Malcom.” Malcom was his brother, who was also a cop.

She rolled her eyes and crossed her arms against her chest. That’s the last thing she wanted to hear, and she made a mental note to alert Malcom’s boss about this. “Whatever. You wanted to talk, so talk.”

Before he could speak, James came down the stairs with a towel wrapped around his waist. “Hey, baby, my mom...” He stopped in his tracks when he saw Lamar standing in his house. “What the hell are you doing here?” This man absolutely wrecked Trinity with his sudden disappearance, and he had the nerve to show his face around here.

Lamar slightly clenched his jaw when he saw this man walk down the stairs. Of course, a woman as amazing as Trinity was taken, and he’s the one who left. He had no right to be jealous, but they didn’t stop the feeling from brewing in his chest. “I see you moved on.”

“She sure as hell did and onto better.” James stepped closer. “Why are you in my house?”

Trinity put her head up to stop what could turn into an ego match between the two of them. “Jay, I let him in. He said he wanted to talk, so I gave him three minutes. However, he’s used two of them already.”

James shook his head and didn’t say a word. He walked back upstairs, stomping on every step. He had spent so much time helping Trinity put herself together after Lamar left. He hoped this didn’t set her back.

“Sorry, I didn’t collect dust waiting on you to return. Start talking or get the hell out.” Her patience for him had run thin years ago.

“I’m sorry.” He said with a deflated tone. He came here to try to win her back, but that ship has now sailed.

“You could have said that shitty apology via text.” She walked back into the kitchen to check on dinner. She realized too late that meant he would start to follow her more into her house, and that was the last thing she wanted.

“Trinity, listen to me. I never meant to hurt you. How could I face you after the shooting?”

Lamar was out with his friend when an altercation broke out between them and a group. Lamar was the one who started the fight, but Josh was the one who was killed. Everyone blamed him for Josh being killed, so he knew Trinity would feel the same. For his sanity, he left the state and started a new life.

“You watched your best friend get killed, and you thought that I, out of all people, wouldn’t be there for you? I was worried sick for weeks that your body was somewhere in a ditch!” She ran her fingers through her hair and smiled to keep from crying. “And you left. Just like that. Five years and I didn’t get a goodbye.”

Lamar plopped down on the couch and realized that Trinity was more hurt than him. She was right. He was the only stability in her life. “This was a waste of time. For some reason, I thought you would be welcoming me with open arms. You’ve obviously moved on, so I guess I need to do the same. Just remember that I never stopped loving you, Trinity, and I never will.”

“Oh my god, you are not about to pull this with me. Of course I’m hurt! We were in a relationship, and the last text I ever got from you was, “Made it to the club.” And the next news I hear is that there was a shooting at that same club. You didn’t even have the decency to tell me you weren’t hurt. I had to hear that from your mother.”

“Trinity—”

She quickly cut him off. “No, listen. After four years, you start realizing things. You were an asshole, Lamar, to everyone. You would constantly point out my flaws, question me like I was the reason why we couldn’t have kids, made me feel like a failure.” She was on the verge of tears, remembering all of those hurtful conversations. “I like to think of myself as a pretty confident person, but when you would say those words to me, it was my childhood all over again.” She slightly turned her head away from him and tried to compose herself. This is exactly why she didn’t want him here. She had done so much work trying to move on from him, and now all of these feelings rushed back to the surface.

He rubbed his face as he thought of all their arguments. He was always the one to throw a low blow first. “You didn’t deserve any of that. I’m sorry.” He wasn’t a good partner to her. They both had their flaws, but she really tried with him.

“I know.” She sat on a cushioned chair across from the couch he was on. “Yet, I stayed.”

“Trinity, I couldn’t tell you why I said those things.”

“I can. You needed someone to hurt as much as you. I was always your punching bag. I always had your back. I was always there for you. It was me. Not your siblings, not your mom, but me. I took everything you gave me and stayed. I thought that after all I did for you, I deserved a proper goodbye.”

“Oh, c’mon, Trin. You left me before.” He had royally messed up, but Trinity had also walked out on him before.

“You knew where I was!” She broke. “You knew that I was alive and well. You knew I hadn’t gone off the deep end. That’s the difference between you and me. I actually consider other people.” All control over her emotions had flown out the window. She was tired of hiding these feelings after all of these years.

“And you think that was an easy time for me?” He said above a whisper. “I was losing people left and right.” About a year before the shooting, Trinity had a mental break. She drove herself to a mental inpatient center and spent 3 months there. She didn’t tell anyone where she was, but checked in so they knew she was still alive.

She regretted not telling anyone why she was leaving, but she had to do what was best for her. “I’m not going to apologize for doing what was right for me.”

“So, why can’t you see where I’m coming from?”

She squinted her eyes at him. “You’re kidding, right? You’re trying to compare apples and oranges right now. You left without a goodbye, without check-ins, and changed your number. You didn’t want me to find you. I could never understand why you did what you did, and I still don’t.”

“No one wanted me around, so I granted everyone their wish.” He said while looking at the floor.

“I wanted you around.” She said in a harsh whisper. “I wanted you around even a year after you left, but you wouldn’t let me in. You can’t push people away and expect them to chase you until you finally get tired of running.”

Hearing that put Lamar at ease for a bit. That maybe all hope wasn’t lost. “Do you really love him?” He said, still looking at the floor.

The soft and gentle expression that was on Trinity’s face immediately went dark. “Get out.”

His head snapped up when he heard the bitterness in her tone. “I’m just asking, man.”

She stood up quickly, mad as hell. Mainly with herself for thinking there was even a slight chance that Lamar had grown up and become a better man. “Get. out.” She said, emphasizing every word and pointing toward the door.

He shook his head and got up. This was far from what he expected. He was frustrated, but he had no right. This was all his fault. “Fine! Since you’re so damn happy, I will gladly leave.” She had changed, and he didn’t blame her. He had messed up, and he would never get her back.

“I am. I have an amazing fiancé and a perfect son. I have a life outside of my job. You need to go, and don’t ever come back. I don’t want anything to do with you anymore. You had your chance and blew it.” She was back in the foyer. “I wish the best for you, Lamar, I do. Just not in my life.” She opened the door.

“Bye, Trinity.” He gave her one last look before he left her life. This time forever.

She closed the door and leaned against it, trying to steady her emotions with deep breaths, with her eyes closed. She heard James come down the stairs and then felt his arms around her.

She buried her face into his chest and let the tears fall. She didn’t really know why she was crying. Maybe it was because she finally got the closure that she needed, or that she was still secretly hurt by Lamar’s actions. It didn’t matter at this point because she had the life she wanted.

“I love you,” James said as he felt his chest dampen. He heard every bit of the conversation and wanted to go after him, but Trinity and her well-being were more important to him in this moment.

“I love you, too.” She muffled into his chest in between sobs.

They embraced each other for a few more minutes before the oven timer went off, and JJ began to cry. They both chuckled.

James kissed her forehead. “I got dinner, and you can get him.”

Trinity nodded and broke away from him. She wiped the tears from her face and walked towards her son’s bedroom. After 37 hours of labor, she was finally able to call herself a mother, and no one could take that away from her. “Hi, baby.” She cooed and picked up her four-month-old son. Despite being a junior, JJ was all Trinity, with only James’s eyes.

“Someone wants dinner, don’t they?” Trinity bounced a little as she walked back into the living room area. “Jay, I’m going to feed him. Can you finish dinner?”

“No problem, baby.”

She smiled and sat on the couch. As soon as Trinity pulled her breast out, JJ cries silenced, and he turned his head to her nipple. Trinity sighed and relaxed into the couch as she felt him latch on.

She tried to focus on her loving fiancé and beautiful son, but her mind kept wandering to Lamar. How dare he waltz in here thinking that she would be excited to see him? And the nerve to ask if she really loved James. She scoffed at the thought.

James was quiet as he made their plates. He knew Trinity would not want to talk about tonight, but eventually something would need to be said. “I know it took a lot for you to say what you had to say tonight. I’m really proud of you. Lamar’s an ass, and he doesn’t deserve you. I’m so glad he screwed up. I love you.”

She glanced over to him with only love and adoration in her eyes. “You’re the only one I want to be with, Jay.” There was a time when she thought Lamar would be her everything, and she even put her life on pause after he ghosted her, waiting for him to return.

Then James walked back into her life and showed her what real love was supposed to look like. He was patient, kind, and always putting her needs first. A moment has never passed in her relationship when she doubted his love and commitment to her. While the pain that she was feeling right now was a lot, it was temporary. The love James had for her was forever.

Lamar leaving is what got her to this exact moment: being properly loved and the mother to a beautiful son. She would never have gotten to this point if Lamar had never left and she had continued to accept his bare-minimum love. It had hurt like hell then, but now she realizes that him leaving was the best thing to happen to her.

I know you want me back
It's time to face the facts that I'm the one that's got away
Lord knows that it would take another place, another time
Another world, another life
Thank God, I found the good in goodbye

Have the week you deserve!

-Avery 🩵

You’ve spent the past few months training, reviewing tape, and making your game plan. But the game has started, and life is up 100 points in the first quarter already.

When are you going to get off the bench and actually implement your plan to WIN? You’re talking that talk, but you haven’t started to walk that walk yet.

Let’s go through a few reasons why you might be subconsciously enjoying your time on the bench.

Reason #1: There’s No Pressure On You.

No one expects greatness from the benchwarmer. When the game is on the line, no one asks for their input. They only get playing time when the team is wayyyy ahead or wayyyy behind.

If you don’t try anything, no one expects anything from you. If you continue to coast through life, people stop depending on you. This may seem like a relief if you used to be the go-to person, but this is a sign that you’re self-sabotaging your success.

Maybe there was a time when you were the franchise player in your life, but injuries(trauma) happened. You weren’t able to perform at that high level anymore, and because you couldn’t provide people with what they were used to, you stopped performing in general. You were tired of the disappointed looks, so you threw in the towel completely.

I need you to pick up that towel and get back in the game. This time, do life for you! You’re always going to disappoint people, but that shouldn’t stop you from living your life. Unfortunately, there will always be unfair expectations put on you from society, family, friends, and even partners. But this isn’t their life, it’s yours. You make it look however you want, no matter how they may react.

Reason #2: You’re Obsessed with Perfection.

You’re waiting for the right moment to start. You just need one more thing to fall in place, but as soon as that happens, you find another reason to wait. Baby, it will never be the right time to live your life.

You do not have to wait until you are the moment is perfect because they will never happen. Let’s get a few things out of the way right now:

• Yes, you’re going to make mistakes.

• Yes, you’re going to look and sound stupid.

• Yes, people are going to be talking about you.

• Yes, there are going to be some huge failures.

• Yes, it’s going to feel embarrassing.

• Yes, it’s going to take some time for everything to come together.

• Yes, your content is going to get ignored at first, especially by your friends and family.

• Yes, there is going to be someone else doing the same thing as you, and maybe better.

All of these feelings are valid, but stop making them the end of your story. The fear of being seen trying comes from never having the space to make mistakes while growing up. You have been subconsciously taught that if you’re not perfect when you do something, you did it wrong and you’re a terrible person. So now you just don’t start at all.

This is not something that you can unpack overnight, but being aware helps you start to make progress. I want you to try at least one of these exercises this week:

• Post a picture on Instagram that does not align with your current “aesthetic” or “vibe”

• Journal Prompt: List out the negative phrases you hear in your mind when you’re trying to walk in your purpose. Then write down where you first heard that phrase and what the situation was.

• Apply to the position/start posting about the business that you think you’re underqualified for.

• Stand in the mirror and say “I am going to be ___” until your voice doesn’t tremble and you believe it. Acknowledge the fears and thoughts that pop up when you’re trying to say it and talk yourself through those emotions.

  • For example, I stand in the mirror and say, “I’m going to be a full-time writer.” I still don’t believe it, I feel my chest tighten, and my stomach drop because I don’t think anyone will take me seriously, etc. But every negative thought that arises, I try to find the root of it and start to reframe my thought process.

• Get dressed in that outfit you’re afraid to leave the house in because you think everyone will stare….and actually leave the house.

If you really want to see some progress, do all five and feel the difference.

Reason #3: You Don’t Want To Ask For Help.

Maybe you’re a super-talented benchwarmer, but just not surrounded by the right coaches.

Despite what we think, we can’t do it alone. Sometimes we do need help, and there’s nothing wrong with that.

Except you hate asking for help, and even considering it makes your stomach turn a bit.

Why is that? Someone threw it back in your face, that didn’t come through when you needed them, they judged you for being in the position you were in, and they started to tell people about your business.

Again, all valid reasons. But how long are you going to let your past control your future? You can’t change the past, you can’t change the fact that people hurt. You can’t change the fact that you trusted them. What you can change is how much power you’re going to allow that person/situation to have over your present and future life.

You could have someone in your life right now with the exact resources you’ve been searching for, but because someone hurt you five years ago, you would rather struggle for the next five years trying to do it on your own instead of asking for help.

When did you get so comfortable with struggling? Why have you convinced yourself that struggling is better than being vulnerable and asking a simple question? Who told you that struggling was your only option when it came to walking in your purpose?

You deserve a life of limited struggle. The world is harsh enough; do not add to your struggle. Ask for help; people want to help you. I want to help you.

This week, start to take your game plan seriously. Stop overthinking and just do it.

Let me be your coach and help you turn into the franchise player of your life.

• Grab your copy of Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way

• Schedule a 1:1 session with me so I can help you not only figure out your game plan, but also help you get rid of the obstacles in your way: Purpose Call

  • If you’re a paid subscriber, your link for the call can be found here: Purpose Call

Have the week you deserve!

Avery 🩵

I am so happy to present to you the first edition of Purpose Magazine!! I wanted to take things a step further than the newsletter and also switch up how I present information to you.

Also, the magazine is where I will be diving deeper into topics, as well as sharing more of my personal life. It’s like our little hideaway 🩵👽.

In the first issue, you can expect:

• Journal prompts to spark your purpose journey

• Affirmations that will have you believing in yourself again

• A cover story that will have you getting back on track

• And more!

The first issue is available to all to read, but all subsequent issues will be for paid subscribers only. Make sure you upgrade your plan now :)

Subscribe now

Without further ado, here’s Purpose Magazine Issue One:

Read Issue One

The first step to abundance is admitting you’ve been settling.

The first step to alignment is admitting you’ve been making the wrong choices.

The first step to freedom is admitting you’ve been holding yourself back.

The first step to living your purposed life is not money, time, or another brainstorming session at 3 am.

It’s coming to the realization that the life you are living is not going to change just because you made a vision board.

Life changes and success starts with self-awareness and accountability.

Take a moment and sit with that reality. Truly let it sink in that, despite your best strategy session, life is not going to change until you decide to be honest with yourself and your shortcomings.

You daydream about your dream life all of the time. You buy planner after planner, writing down all of these goals and aspirations. You follow people on social media who are currently living the life you desire, yet you keep falling short.

Sorry, let me hold your hand.

Let me be clear, you’re not falling short because something is wrong with you. You’re falling short because you are more excited about the destination than the journey. You want to see instant results and do not want to put in any more work than you already have. You have only focused on the aesthetics of alignment, not on the work it takes to get there.

You gotta be real with yourself.

The life you yearn for is on the other side of hard work. You can do all the praying, planning, journaling, manifesting, etc., you want. However, we all know faith without works is dead.

You have everything you need to live on purpose, but you’re never addressing the root of your issues, which sets you up for failure every time.

The problem starts within.

When it comes to acting on the life that you want, you have invisible obstacles that you have to destroy.

i’m not smart enough.

who would pay attention to me?

everyone else is already doing this, what makes me different?

who would listen to me?

i’m not talented enough to make this a career.

people won’t pay me for this.

i’m too young to be taken seriously.

i’m too old to start over.

These are the invisible obstacles that come up as soon as you start to reach a flow state with flowing your dreams. The problem is that instead of debunking these thoughts with the truth, you obsess over them, give them power, and eventually back off on your dream, which gives them the victory.

Then it takes you another 6 months before you either consider following your dreams again. However, because you never address these thoughts head-on, you stay in an endless loop of never living on purpose.

How to change that:

The next time you’re up at 3am planning your life rebrand, make these goals with the lazy, unmotivated, undisciplined, sleepy, and irritable version of you in mind. Because, of course, on your best days, you will perform. But when those bad days come, and you don’t feel like doing anything but lying in bed, it’s important that your goals don’t suffer, and neither does your mental health.

So let’s try some simple, different wordplay when setting your goals:

I’m going to wake up at 5 am to go to the gym on Monday, Wednesday, and Friday. —> I’m going to go to the gym three times a week.

Same goal, more freedom. The time and day you go to the gym don’t matter, as long as you go.

I’m going to write 3,000 words this week. —> I’m going to write three days this week.

Same idea, but less pressure. Instead of giving yourself a hard number, which could make you just write slop to hit 3000, you make it broader to hit your goal.

I’m going to post on my social media accounts every day. —> I’m going to post on one social media platform every day for a month.

Build the habit of posting every day first, then add the volume later.

When you’re first trying to build a good habit, stopping your old habits cold turkey and putting the pedal to the metal is a surefire way to failure.

When you’re making your goals, envision you on your worst day: Is this still something you would want to do, even for five minutes? If the answer is no, chances are you’re reaching too far too fast.

Your goals can and should get more specific and strict as time goes on, but if you’re just starting out, slow and steady wins the race.

Want to learn more about invisible and visible obstacles, as well as how to overcome them? Grab your copy of Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way, turn to chapters eight & nine, and be prepared to do some homework.

Are you a paid subscriber of The World of Avery? If not, the benefits just got an upgrade, and I think you want to elevate your stay on Planet Avery 👽 with benefits like:

• pulling me for a chat

• digital zine to upgrade your life

• writing previews of upcoming work

Subscribe now

July is going to be a great month, and you don’t want to miss it!

Have the week you deserve!

-Avery 🩵

Even if you happen to book a nice vacation, you need more than a week away to recharge.

We’re coming off a 3-day weekend (for some), and it made me realize that having an extra day off means nothing if I didn’t spend at least an hour focusing on filling my cup again.

Full transparency, I am burnt out. I’ve been dealing with it probably since February of this year, and moving across the country did not help me at all. (If anything, I’m more stressed out than before.)

So I’m writing this newsletter because I want you to be better than me. Don’t wait until you’re in the middle of a storm to put on your raincoat and boots. At the first sign of drizzle, you know what’s going to happen, and you should prepare accordingly.

In other words, you shouldn’t wait until you’ve hit burnout to take care of yourself. Self-care should be proactive, not reactive. You don’t have to earn rest or a break; they should already be built into your very busy schedule.

But I’m not here to talk to you about the importance of self-care; instead, I'm here to talk to you about (healthy) coping mechanisms, particularly yours.

In chapter 8 of Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way, I talk about building a toolbox of coping mechanisms to better manage burnout. Here’s a preview from that chapter to further explain what I mean:

Tackling your invisible obstacles requires you to get out of your own way. Your list of invisible obstacles can look overwhelming, but with your toolbox of coping mechanisms, you can handle anything life throws your way.

Before you go on a road trip, you always make sure that you have a survival and first aid kit, as well as making sure you have all the tools you need to fix a flat or any other minor car issue.

You should be doing the same thing for your life and emotions. When things get hard for you, you should be able to open this toolbox of coping mechanisms and get through your storm.

For example, my toolbox has a hot shower, a good playlist, edibles, prayer, a folder of praise, Bob’s Burgers, therapy, journaling, and exercise in it.

When things hit the fan, I depend on one or more of these things to help me through whatever I’m going through. My tools help me with emotional regulation, confidence, relaxation, solutions, and joy.

These are the five categories you want to focus on when you are filling up your toolbox.

Add a few things that will help you regulate how you feel (journaling, exercise, and therapy).

Add things that will help you believe in yourself and your ability to go after your dreams (a folder, photo album, document, etc. with compliments from people and stats from your projects/job/business/school).

You want things that can help you relax (hot shower and a good playlist, edibles).

You want things that are going to help you come up with solutions (praying and therapy).

And of course, you want to add things that are going to spark joy in your life. (Bob’s Burgers)

Everyone’s toolbox is going to look different, so don’t feel like you have to add certain things, but those categories are a great guiding light when you are creating your toolbox.

With your toolbox, those invisible obstacles become easier to manage and make the purpose journey that much easier to cruise along.

As you can see, I love a good metaphor, lol. But what I want you to take from this newsletter today is that even though life doesn’t stop for anyone, you have to be dedicated to taking a moment for yourself in order to continue pouring into others.

It’s also important to have these healthy coping mechanisms in your back pocket for the times you are feeling stressed, triggered, or a combination of both.

Don’t wait until you’re at wits’ end to do something about how you’re feeling.

As you guys know, my papa passed away in November of 2025. It’s been very hard on my family, but through it all, we wanted to continue his legacy. My mom and I have launched a scholarship fund in his name to help those affected by addiction have access to higher education.

Please share the link with your friends and family, and if you have it on your heart to donate, that would be amazing as well. You can find out all the information here: https://bold.org/funds/dr-mozell-haymon-memorial-scholarship-fund/

Have the week that you deserve!

-Avery 🩵

You know what hasn’t been fun, though? The constant voice in my head that is only worried about money.

All I think about is money and if I have enough of it. Every day, it’s nonstop:

• Can I afford rent?

• Did I pay that bill?

• Oh, great, another bill reminder.

• Do I have enough gas for the week?

• If I go out, we’re just going to have water only and order an appetizer

• Has my car always made that sound?

• Dang! I forgot to cancel that free trial!

• Is there a limit on how many times I can transfer from savings to checking in a week?

• Where’s the cheapest gas station?

• Can I afford ground beef and chicken this week?

Is this all there is to adulthood? Just working, worrying about bills, and having to plan moments of joy? If so, I would like a refund.

Maybe I’m being dramatic or doing life wrong (which is a very strong possibility), but while this past month has been amazing, it’s also been an uncomfortable adjustment.

It feels like I’m taking a test on something I never studied before, and I’m supposed to ace it.

It feels like I just called to be in the big leagues, but I still have a minor league skill set.

I feel like I’m in the middle of the ocean with only a raft and no island in sight.

I feel like I’m being required to change and grow at an unsustainable pace.

Life feels like a game of UNO, and I keep having to draw four.

Breathe.

I don’t regret my decision to move. I don’t even regret the city of choice. There are no regrets, actually.

I just can’t relax fully, and that’s the problem with adulthood.

The other shoe is always going to drop.

When it rains, it’s going to pour.

If it ain’t one thing, trust, it’s gone be another.

We have accepted the fact that adulthood is just always going to be miserable, but you’re allowed a few moments of joy, only if you have the time, energy, and/or money to do so.

And I don’t want to live like that. I actually can’t keep living like that. I’ve spent most of my years on this Earth, miserable, hating life, and doing anything to not survive.

This world has siphoned enough of my misery to power NYC for a decade. I’m not giving it anymore.

So, I’m taking over the world. My world, at least, and I encourage you to do the same.

Step One: Prayer

I know God is my Provider and I will never want for anything. My move to Portland has been a whole testimony, and He has not let the well run dry! Even through His faithfulness, my thoughts spiral, so I need to spend more time in His presence.

Step Two: Life Audit

It’s time for a life audit. I’m going to analyze every aspect of my life (mental, emotional, physical, financial, romantic relationships, platonic relationships, etc), everything will be looked over with a magnifying glass, and I will identify the places I’m lacking/neglecting and the places I’m probably watering too much.

I will also identify things I can outsource or eliminate in general that no longer serve their purpose.

Step Three: Outline What I Want My Life to Feel Like

I have a very broad idea of what I want my life to look like, but I haven’t been taking all the steps to make that life a reality. However, this will allow me to become even more detailed and hone in on specific things.

Step Four: Make the (Realistic) Plan

For the rest of the year, I will be locking IN. However, I need a plan to follow that I know I can stick to. I’ll set quarterly, monthly, weekly, and daily goals to help me stay on track.

Step Five: Execution

I have a bad habit of making the plan, but not following through. However, I feel like God is putting me in a position where I choose to continue to live a miserable life or finally take the chance on Him and myself. I’m betting on the dynamic duo.

The world is still very much going to suck. However, your life should be a place of refuge from the sucky world we live in. Until we dismantle and rebuild the system, I’m going to create a world that lets me do more than just survive because surviving is the bare minimum, and I refuse to live a bare minimum life.

The Link-Up

• I created a house-warming registry for anyone who wants to help me turn my apartment into a home 😊 Wishlist

• Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way is the perfect book for you to grab if you’re going to join me in creating your own world. I do more than help you figure out your purpose; I also help you create a Blueprint to follow to live your dream life, overcome any obstacles life may throw your way, and increase your confidence to live out loud.

Donate to The World of Avery

Have the week that you deserve!

-Avery 💙

So here is the full version for you guys to indulge in.

The First Dance

“You want my help with what?” David asked again to make sure he heard Miranda right. Miranda was not the kind of woman to ask for help, especially from her on-and-off again best friend, David. Their relationship could only be described as brother and sister, whose bond grew stronger the more they got on each other’s nerves.

Miranda let out an exasperated sigh. She prayed for just one day that David wouldn’t be a thorn in her side, but it seems like today will not be that day. “To help me practice my ballroom dancing. I want to impress Robin.” She repeated her request with less enthusiasm than the first time she spoke it.

Peter, David’s husband, jumped into the conversation as he felt the tension between the two rising. His day job was a data analyst, but the job he could never clock out of was being the mediator between his husband and their best friend.

“That’s so sweet, Miranda. Of course, he’ll help.” He stated it in a tone that gave David the hint that he had no choice but to help Miranda with the request.

David looked at Peter, surprised that his husband would just volunteer him for this favor.

“What?” Peter replied. “It’s the least you could do for her.” He stated with a shrug.

“Yes, David. It is the least you could do for me after I’ve saved your life countless times.” Miranda said with bitterness slightly dripping from every word. David and Miranda were in the army together, and he had the tendency to not only piss off the enemy but their fellow soldiers as well.

He rolled his eyes, crossed his arms, and let out a small sigh. “And I feel like that was the least you could do for trying to kill me countless times.

“You really know how to hold a grudge.” Miranda immediately retorted.

Without missing a beat, David spoke, “Hello, pot. It’s kettle.”

This was the dynamic that somehow weirdly worked for them after 20 years of friendship. Constant jabs, sarcastic remarks, and bickering like an old married couple.

Miranda rolled her eyes and threw her hands up as she turned around to leave their apartment. “Forget it! I’ll find someone else.” She couldn’t understand why it was so hard for him to just say yes. He was a trained dancer, for crying out loud.

Peter nudged David and pointed towards Miranda, giving him that look that he needed to stop her before she left.

After an eye roll that Peter was sure allowed David to see his brain, he finally spoke. “Miranda, wait.”

She stopped in her tracks, but didn’t turn around to face him. She was near tears because all she wanted was to make the adult prom a special night with Robin.

Neither one of them got to experience prom, and now they could do it together. Unfortunately, Miranda had two left feet and, despite being Black, had the rhythm of a sloth. Clearly, the rhythm gene skipped her.

“I will help you with your dancing to impress Robin.” He said in a sincere voice. Robin was the first guy Miranda had brought around in years, so he knew that things were getting serious with them. He didn’t want to get in the way of her finding love.

She turned around and softly smiled, grateful that her friend was finally going to help her. “Thank you. Be at my place tomorrow morning. It’s going to be a long day.”

“My love,” Robin said, stepping into the kitchen. He had just gotten back from dropping Riley, his son, off with his mother.

“Hm?” Miranda replied while she was still focused on the task at hand. She was making lasagna for dinner tonight and for tomorrow. She knows that after dancing all day with David, she would not be up to standing on her feet to make dinner.

He walked farther into the kitchen with some sunflowers in his hand. “Can you look at me?” Things were still a little tense between them after Miranda discovered that Tracy, Riley’s mom, had been trying to get back with Robin during the last few drop-offs and encounters they’ve had.

She laid down the last row of pasta on the lasagna before she turned to look at him. There was distance between them, as there has been lately. She had always had a hard time trusting people, and when she found out that Robin was keeping this secret from her, it made her step back and re-evaluate their relationship.

Even after constant reassurance from Robin, his friends, and family, she still couldn’t understand why he didn’t feel the need to share those details with her.

But that’s also why she wanted to go to the prom with him. They needed a night to themselves, no Tracy, no kids, just them. She missed what they had before, but she was struggling to get past this.

Her eyes immediately went to the flowers, and she smiled. “Robin..” She started but trailed off as she felt herself growing emotional and teary.

“I’ve been messing up a lot, lately, but I want to try to make things up to you. Can I take you to prom?” Robin asked nervously. Miranda giving him another chance was not something he wanted to take for granted. When Miranda brought up this prom, he knew this was his chance to start to make things right.

She didn’t know why him properly asking her to the prom when they had already bought outfits and tickets cause the tears forming in her eyes to fall, but it did. Robin was trying, really trying to fix their relationship and regain her trust. And that’s how she knew she was with the right man. “Yes, I will go to prom with you.” She said with a slight chuckle at the fact that she just accepted a promposal at the ripe age of 38.

Robin took two steps to close the space between them. He leaned forward and captured her lips softly. He dropped the flowers to his side and left no space between their bodies. Emotionally, they were fine, but physically, their relationship changed. They went from never being able to keep their hands off of each other to never even cuddling in bed anymore. So, when they had moments like this, both of them enjoyed it.

Miranda opened her mouth, and Robin immediately slid his tongue in. Miranda moaned and felt herself getting pushed back against the counter. That’s when she remembered the lasagna. She reluctantly pulled away with a small gasp.

“I have to finish dinner.” She said softly and plainly. Though it was the last thing on her mind right now. It was the first time in a long time that she kissed Robin and didn’t think about Tracy at all.

Robin cleared his throat as he stepped back from her. “Yes, of course. I shall leave you to dinner making. Where’s Hendrix?” He inquired about Miranda’s son from her previous relationship.

“Hendrix is staying with David and Peter.” She stated.

That reply got an eyebrow raise out of Robin. “So, we’re alone tonight?” He asked in a suggestive tone. A tone that Miranda knew all too well.

She nodded while pushing her hair behind her ear. “That would be correct.” She said, looking down at the ground. If she looked Robin in the eye right now, there was no way she would be able to deny him.

He laid the sunflowers on the kitchen island. “Well, no offense, my love, but I couldn’t care less about lasagna right now.” He said before grabbing her face and kissing her hard. He was tired of not being able to be like this with her.

Miranda instantly wrapped her arms around him and brought them as close as she could. She was done with letting Tracy ruin their connection. Robin was her man.

“And last but not least, our Treasurer Miranda Mills!” The MC said into the microphone.

Robin’s eyes immediately flew to the door. This is the exact moment he had been waiting for the entire night. He moved through the crowd and made sure he had the best view in the room.

Two Black men dressed in full suits opened the doors, and Miranda appeared. She was in a pale pink, stone-encrusted, strapless ball gown. Her dark brown and curly hair was pinned to the back, and her makeup was very light and natural.

Miranda’s eyes scanned the crowd to find Robin, and when she found him, she couldn’t help but smile. He was always so handsome, but seeing him dressed up always added an extra sparkle to her eye.

Robin couldn’t even form thoughts. Miranda was always beautiful in his eyes, but this took her beauty to another level. “Wow.” He said, stepping towards her, but was pushed aside by Riley.

“Mandy, you look pretty!” Riley was Robin’s six-year-old son who had completely stolen Miranda’s heart. She was so thankful that their blended family got along. Another reason why she didn’t just up and leave Robin because they had a family, and Hendrix and Riley would be devastated if they broke up.

Miranda’s eyes left Robin’s as she looked down at the little boy, who was dressed in an all-black suit with a red tie. “Thank you, my knight. You look very handsome yourself.” She said, ruffling his hair a little.

He giggled, showing off those deep dimples that allowed him to get away with anything. “Thank you, Queen.”

They had the royal nicknames for each other because Riley was currently obsessed with Sofia the First.

“I agree with Riley. You look very beautiful, Miranda.” Robin said, grabbing her hand and kissing it softly.

A slight blush crept up on Miranda’s cheeks. Robin was the only one who genuinely complimented her and never failed to make her feel slightly bashful because she had never felt so wanted and loved in her life. “Thank you. You look very nice yourself.”

Robin was out of his usual jogging pants and hoodie. He dressed up in a Persian blue suit. “The boys said you might like this.” He said, slightly tugging at the sleeve. This wasn’t his usual look, so he needed help.

She smirked. “Well, they were right for once.”

“Mandy, will you dance with me?” Riley asked, pulling at her dress to get her attention.

She smiled down at him. “Of course.” She looked up at Robin. “Excuse us.” She said before Riley led her to the dance floor.

Robin watched from a distance as two of the three most important people in his life danced around and laughed as if no one else mattered in the world. The third person, Hendrix, walked up to him. “Riley is stealing mom again, I see.” He said matter-of-factly. It was common knowledge that Riley was Miranda’s favorite, and everyone just accepted it.

Robin quickly glanced at Hendrix before turning his attention back to the two of them. “It’s those dimples. I curse passing them down.” He said with a smile on his face. It actually warmed his heart that Riley and Miranda had their own separate relationship with each other. It made his and Miranda’s relationship easier.

Hendrix chuckled. “I’m glad things are better with you two, I mean, besides the Tracy thing. I’ve never seen my mom this happy.”

“She’s pretty happy with you.”

“Well, yeah, I’m her kid,” Hendrix said in a duh voice. “I’m talking about outside of me. She’s happy with you.”

“I only want to make your mother happy.”

“You do,” Hendrix said with a smile. “And you’re pretty cool.” Hendrix and Robin weren’t as close as Mirand and Riley, but Hendrix did love Robin.

Robin smiled and wrapped his arm around Hendrix’s shoulder. “That means a lot to me, kid.” Hendrix was sixteen, so getting them to express their feelings was not easy, but hearing this put Robin at ease.

“Mandy, my feet hurt. You can go dance with daddy now.” Riley said.

She chuckled. “Okay, go rest.”

“I think she’s free,” Hendrix said, nudging Robin. “Go sweep her off her feet.”

Robin quickly made his way to Miranda before anyone else tried to dance with her. It was bad enough that he was in competition with his own boy. “May I have this dance?”

“Of course.” She smiled, feeling like a teenager all over again.

He simply grabbed her hand. Of course, a slow song came on at the exact same time.

Although she and David spent all day dancing, she was still nervous about dancing with Robin and in front of half the town.

They started slowly dancing, and Miranda felt herself completely relax with Robin. He was taking the lead, and she was surprised he could move so well on the dance floor.

“You look absolutely stunning, Miranda. This was definitely worth the wait.”

“Thank you. I wanted to make sure I looked good for you.”

“Oh, you never have to try hard.” He said with complete honesty. “I’m constantly at a loss for words with you around. Just breathtaking.”

God, he was on a roll with the compliments tonight. She didn’t even try to hide the blush that crept up on her cheeks. “You’re too much.”

“On the contrary, dear, I don’t think I’m enough.” He said, slightly dipping her and then quickly pulling her back into his embrace.

“You’re more than enough for me, Robin.” She said softly, looking him directly in the eyes. Yes, they came from two completely different backgrounds, but that meant nothing to her. Robin completely loved, trusted, cared for, and supported her, and as she said, that was more than enough for her.

He was taken aback by the vulnerability that she was showing, but was enjoying every bit of it. “I love you.” He said before kissing her sweetly.

She felt all the emotions that he put into the kiss and knew she could finally say those three words back to him. “I love you, too.”

Robin was surprised, but very happy that she finally felt comfortable enough to say the words. He had always felt the love, but hearing her actually say it gave love an entirely new meaning. “Good, because you’re stuck with me forever.”

She chuckled at him breaking the moment, but agreed with him. “I wouldn’t have it any other way.”

Have a great week!

-Avery 💙

My darlings, the last month of my life has been crazy! The day I sent the last newsletter was the same day I put in my two weeks at my job. I had nothing lined up, but the job had started to drain me and had become a very toxic environment.

In this economy, that would scare some, but I had no fear, but faith in God. I just knew it was my time to go. What I didn’t know was what God had in store for me.

On my last day of work, I had my first interview for a job in Portland, Oregon. I was applying to jobs all over the country because I knew that, if I stayed in El Paso, I would never be able to be all of me. My time in the Sun City had come to a very abrupt end.

One week after that first interview, I was offered a position at the company and began planning my fourth cross-country move in 6 years.

Through God’s grace, my friends and family (especially my Granny), I was able to secure my first apartment, get to Portland, and settle into my new life. My community always shows out for me, and I couldn’t be more grateful.

As I write this newsletter, I’ve been in Portland for 4 days, and I feel so at peace with this decision. I can’t wait to start building my life here and just be Avery. I’ve been masking and watering myself down for so long, made myself more palatable for others, and now that’s no longer the case.

I’m about 98% unpacked and have a kitchen full of groceries. I’m grateful. 🙏🏽

Word On The Street

So the last time we talked, I had four books in the works. That has dropped to 2.5 books 🤣.

Book A is a sci-fi book about a teenager having to save the world. (Not sure how I feel about this one anymore, but we’ll see. I don’t hate it, but I’m also not in love with it.)

Book B is a forbidden love story about the president and vice president of a top company. (This book is just flowing out with ease. I’m realizing this is such a vague description of it and makes it sound like so many different storylines, but I promise it is different.)

Book C is Sex in the City, except they own a business together, are all queer, and hate to lose. And now their reputation is on the line. (This book is turning out to be a love letter to my besties, but it’s so funny and heartwarming. I love friendship.)

Book D is a story about what to do when you’re faced with risking it all for your dream or playing it safe. (I cut this one completely. It was not giving what it needed to give.)

Block Party Entertainment

What I’ve been watching:

• Tournament of Champions

• Grey’s Anatomy

• The Masked Singer

• Abbott Elementary

• Bob’s Burgers (obvi)

What I’ve been reading:

• Eleanor Oliphant Is Completely Fine (3.75 stars)

• Something Like Possible (3.5 stars)

• Atmosphere (2.5 stars)

What I’ve been listening to:

• Gonna Be a Lovely Day by Kirk Franklin

• This Is the Day by Fred Hammond

• War by Charles Jenkins

• The Presence of the Lord Is Here by Byron Cage

• Yorktown from Hamilton

• Great God Great Praise by Kurt Carr

• Get Low by Lil Jon & The East Side Boyz

• No Greater Love by Kellee Johnson

• Sing Hallelujah by Naomi Raine

• Worth It All by Enrique Holmes

• All I Need Is You by Erica Campbell

The Link-Up

• I created a home-warming registry for anyone who wants to help me turn my apartment into a home 😊 Wishlist

• Your Life, Your Purpose, Your Way is the last self-help book you’ll ever need. Instead of throwing quotes at you, you’ll get actionable steps to not only discover your purpose in life, but to do it with confidence and ease.

Unc Said:

• You only live once. Like, I need you to really grasp that idea. This is your only life. If your life were a movie, would it sell or would it flop? Stop letting fear, anxiety, lack of support, etc., hold you back from living! I decided to move across the country, to a city I’ve never even visited, just like that. Was it easy? No, but man, life is too short to just stay stuck. Get up!!!!!

Helping Hand (A list of crowdfunding requests I come across during the week):

• Brandy was recently robbed and needs help to pay bills.

• Rebeka needs help with rent and medical bills.

Have the week that you deserve!

-Avery 💙