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For the past three years, I've listened to every single session — always in the background, monitoring the safe space we've created. I knew I couldn't let these teachings just sit in the past and collect dust. So we built a space for it, one you can come back to anytime. We hope you find the Shadow Archives as valuable as we intend it to be.

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The saddest poem I ever wrote 
Was the one in which my pride was smote 
Sad but true 
With the power to liberate you 

I no longer care if something is sad 
In the end all that matters is freedom 
Once I can liberate me 
I am free to be all that I can be 

I hear the love in my son's voice 
And in my daughter’s too 
And I know I have achieved something 
And that it is true
 
I heard the hatred in my mother's voice 
And I knew that it was true 
And I alchemized it in my heart 
And made it into love for you
 
I did that in this lifetime 
And it stands the test of time 
It was an act of lasting Grace 
And it has saved this heart of mine

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As humans we struggle to embrace unexpected demands. On a deeper level, it is safe to say, our ego thinks it “owns time” — “my time” means “I own it”. Truth is, nobody owns time and that level of control is unrealistic and impossible. Father Time himself would be laughing at the very idea.

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Now, consider The Tools: both traditions share the same core insight—the Ego alone is insufficient, prone to contracting and mistaking its own limits for reality's limits. Where the two traditions diverge is in method. The Inklings were artists and diagnosticians who fought materialism with beauty and story, prescribing cultural remedies like recovering myth and reuniting reason with intuition.

The Tools, by contrast, aim to go a step further by offering concrete practice. Recognizing that intellectual or aesthetic insight alone tends to fade—the Ego quickly absorbs and files away realizations—The Tools provide specific, repeatable procedures for making direct contact with whatever lies beyond the Ego, whatever one calls it. This is a continuation of the same lineage: the Inklings pointed toward the door, while The Tools offer a method for actually opening it.

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Now, imagine we – as a group – are connected to one another. Imagine everyone around you and everyone reading this are communing with their own Shadows – just as you are with yours. Don’t worry about the details of what anyone else’s shadow looks like or what they are talking about; just imagine that we are all interwoven in a web that connects us all.

• That web means the ongoing work you do on your Shadow will facilitate the work everyone else does on their Shadow.

• Likewise, the work everyone else does helps facilitate the work you do on yours.

Energy is fluid, and the web is what holds it.

As many of you know I recently completed my memoir — Ahead of All Parting — and while writing it I had to relive the experience of being diagnosed. I went back to the day that I announced my diagnosis to the community and I realized that the following excerpt is just as relevant now as it was back then. As my memory fades, I would like to continue to share archival entries from the last few years or more as a way to keep me tethered to the community and to the experiences we have shared along the way.

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I MUST GIVE BIRTH

I dance 
And in the dance I see myself as a child 
Gyrating freely, wildly 
With the abandon that only a child can bring.

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They also walk through practical shadow work exercises and reflection strategies—like imaginal visualization and connecting the dots through honest inquiry—so you’re not just thinking about growth, you’re actually doing it. If you’ve been avoiding certain parts of your past, this is your sign to come a little closer (without shame).

With love,
Barry & Jamie

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Join Barry on Sunday, July 12th at 10am PT for Dark Shadows, where we can dive back into the work within community.

A Note from Jamie:

One afternoon in the spring of 2016, while waiting to board a flight out of Boston Logan airport, I purchased and downloaded an audio version of The Tools. It wasn’t entirely an impulse buy—I’d faintly remembered it being on a list of celebrity book recommendations. Still, when I first pressed “play,” I could not have expected the impact this book would have on me then, and the impact it’s had on my life since.

I certainly could not have expected that ten years later, I’d be filming this video with Barry Michels himself, reflecting on exactly that stretch of time leading up to my discovery of his brilliant work.

The conversation with Barry here reminds me of how much I’ve grown since then. 

More importantly, it reminds me of how much more growth is possible through the miracle of shadow work, a practice that opens doors to continuous self-discovery, self-compassion, revelation and resolution. 

I hope you enjoy this glimpse of it in action. 

-Jamie Taylor

Key Takeaways:

• Shadow work is a powerful tool for personal growth—it helps you notice what you’ve been carrying (and what you’ve been avoiding).

• Practical exercises make it actionable, so you can connect with your shadow in a way that feels grounded, not vague.

• Reflection builds self-awareness by helping you understand how your past shows up in your present.

• Healing relationships starts with vulnerability and honesty, especially when you’re willing to name what’s real.

• Symbols can reveal shadow traits, giving you another way to recognize what’s underneath your patterns.

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Jamie Taylor has been part of the Tools community in a formal way since Barry launched his virtual group sessions in 2020. Since then, she’s had the opportunity to attend multi-day Shadow Workshops with Barry at the Omega Institute and in Ojai.

Professionally, Jamie advises biotechnology companies in Silicon Valley and internationally on growth strategy. She is a lecturer on the Economics of Innovation at the MIT Sloan School of Business and at Yale University. She lives with her husband and three children in Menlo Park, California.

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The discussion also highlights the importance of relationships and community support. Barry and Sadiq explore how meaningful connections and shared support systems are essential for navigating new environments and challenges. They discuss the courage it takes to embrace one’s unique path, confront fear directly, and pursue personal and professional goals with intention and authenticity.

With love,
Barry, Ashley & Sadiq

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Join Sadiq in NYC on June 27th at 12pm at The Oculus: World Trade Center for a special fitness experience.

A Note from Sadiq:

“Being a part of this community has been so transformational for me. It helped me realize the extent to which I carry the weight of so many past experiences. I didn't even understand the concept of shadow until I met Barry and the members of this community. Now I have learned frameworks that have brought to light deep emotions that eluded me and given them names and faces. I now successfully work with them toward realizing my true sense of self. I HONESTLY feel like I am now on the journey to becoming the man I am destined to be.

On this particular call with Barry, I got a special opportunity to further validate the lessons I have learned across cultures, religions, and life as a whole. I have been so inspired that I am now creating and putting together my own unique tools that I have used to navigate my journey through the challenges I have faced. I know these issues are not unique to me, and can’t wait to help others on their own journeys.

Thank you Barry (and of course my wife, Ashley) for this opportunity and lifetime of coaching summed up in just about an hour!”

Key Takeaways:

• The challenges of adapting to a new culture can become a source of resilience and leadership.

• Fear doesn’t disappear with success—it becomes manageable through consistent action.

• Entrepreneurship requires making decisions before you feel fully ready.

• Visualization is most powerful when paired with consistent action and accountability.

• Experiences that feel like setbacks often become the foundation for future growth.

• Finding a supportive community can accelerate personal transformation and self-discovery.

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Sadiq Abubakar is a 2x startup founder and ex-banker working in strategy, fundraising, and go-to-market execution. He also works as a high-end trainer and coach, helping clients improve performance, clarity, and mental resilience. Passionate about technology, entrepreneurship, and wellness, and building systems that support a better life.

We are so excited to share Barry’s new book coming out on September 29th, 2026. This is a memoir that speaks to your own inner shadow, leaving you with the courage to live a more potent life.

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FREE AT LAST

I danced through life 
My feet moving so fast I could not see them 

The music 
Lifting my body up and carrying it through its steps

Never has a body so resembled music 
Climbing higher and higher 
Until there is nowhere else to go but down 
Diving, drowning, descending 
Never has a body fallen so far and so fast

And I am free 
And I am free 
And I am free 

At last

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Join Barry on May 17th for Dark Shadows (online event) and on May 31st for a poetry reading. If you’re in the LA area, join us in person! Can’t make it to LA? No worries — you can livestream it from home.

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Barry talks about relying on higher forces to help guide his work especially in the last couple of years. Barry relates it to Buckethead playing guitar, it feels as if something is speaking through him, whether it’s God or his subconscious, something greater. Buckethead brings up that practitioners of Barry’s caliber have a method and approach, instead Barry’s is much more reliant of what needs to be said or conveyed from higher forces.

Buckethead talks about the first time he saw Barry over 20 years ago, the crossroads of his life and understanding that your identity can either be derived from within or the outside world. The problem with deriving your identity from the outside world, is that the outside world comes to define you and even limit you in certain ways. Barry explains that when we look to the outside world to define us we allow other people to limit our potential—defining ourselves by how people see us rather than by what we put out into the world.

They go even further to talk about the balance between rejection and validation. How it can throw you off quickly. By going back to what you are putting out in the world, you discover who you are and the world does as well. How will you put yourself out into the world this week?

With love,
Barry & Buckethead

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He’s honest about what that grounding feels like. There’s often a small hit of disappointment—not failure, but the soft deflation of fantasy. For him, that’s not a problem—it’s proof the tool is working. Sylvia’s line of questioning keeps everything anchored in lived experience: how does this actually function when someone is in it?

The conversation then turns to skepticism. Sylvia names what she sees in practice: people often agree to do The Tools® without fully entering them. Barry doesn’t argue for belief. He returns to one instruction—treat it as an experiment. No fixed opinion, just observe what happens. Skepticism, in his view, is the ego trying to stay certain before experience can speak.

Finally, they move into the quieter territory of perception in clinical work. Barry describes becoming “porous” in session—receiving impressions, images, intuitions that don’t always match what’s being said, but often prove accurate. Sylvia echoes this from her own experience of learning to step back and let something else lead. What emerges between them is less a method than a stance: less certainty, more openness, and a willingness to trust what shows up.

With love,
Barry & Sylvia

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Sylvia will be presenting at our very first Shadow Summit — May 2nd, 2025! Free! Virtual! Join Us! 🌈

A Note from Sylvia:

Almost 10 years ago I was sitting in my car on a highway. Hungover. Again. Tired. Again. I saw myself from a distance and wondered: where is that radiant woman with hopes and dreams I once was?

That was the moment the mask cracked open.

I had spent years being very good at keeping it together on the outside. Hard-working, perfectionistic, always performing. Nobody saw what was underneath. I barely saw it myself.

The Tools® found me in that crack. And I want to be honest with you: it did not fix everything overnight. It still hasn’t. I still practice. I still go through it every day. But in the end this work saved my life.

Being part of this community is truly a gift. The dark shadow meetings. Barry’s Substack. The conversations. All of it lands.

Getting to sit down with Barry and ask him these questions was an honour.
Thank you Ashley. Thank you Barry. And thank you to all of you for being a place where this work is taken seriously.

The only way is through.

With active love, Sylvia

Key Takeaways:

• The “upside down triangle” is used to quickly ground over-excitement and bring a person back into reality.

• A subtle drop in enthusiasm or disappointment can actually indicate the tool is working correctly.

• The Tools® are most effective when treated as experiments rather than beliefs to adopt.

• Skeptics don’t need convincing—just an invitation to observe what happens without fixed opinions.

• Effective change comes from direct experience and consistent use, not intellectual understanding alone.

• In therapy, insight often emerges intuitively through impressions, images, and nonverbal cues beyond words.

• Noticing and reinforcing even very small signs of client progress is key to sustaining momentum.
  

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Sylvia Holtslag is a self-leadership coach based in the Netherlands. She has worked with the Tools® for nearly a decade, using them in her practice to help people break through fear, self-criticism and old patterns. She works with clients all over the world in Dutch and English.You can find Sylvia at sylviaholtslag.nl and on Substack at .

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But maybe it’s the best kind of insanity. Because nothing forces you to grow like a

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What starts as humor (we promise it’s going somewhere 🙃) quickly deepens into an exploration of “the power of shadows”—those hidden parts of ourselves that quietly shape our desires, fears, and behaviors. As the conversation moves between laughter and reflection, it becomes clear that these often-overlooked parts of us might actually have the most to say.

With love,
Elder-Barry 😉 , Patrick, & Ashley

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P.S. — Patrick will be one of our presenters at our very first Shadow Summit! 🏔

A Note from Patrick:

Another Note from Patrick:

Hi Shadow Friends,

I had a blast hanging out with Barry and Ashley as I peppered Barry with my questions from a man staring at the age of 50. His wisdom was illuminating (teaser: bacon! suffering!). Like many, I discovered the wonderful world of The Tools and Shadow work after watching Stutz. Pearls on a string with little turds inside! Exactly! I was intrigued and quickly coached up by Barry, Kristan, and all things Phil.

I’m a pediatric neurologist, specializing in epilepsy and functional neurologic symptoms–I live and work in the land in between–brain, mind, body. I come from a line of surly Anglican priests and pastors–the world of spirit, soul, and body. That’s pretty much the whole person. Don’t forget all those shadows.

I thought I’d have it all figured out by now. Was I ever wrong! I’m still trying to finish that middle grade novel, launch that epilepsy coaching business, the Maui epilepsy wellness retreats, oh and create more on my own Substack?! I’m trying to not chuck my 16-year-old daughter’s phone into the woods and of course, to realize, that just maybe, I’m already enough and loved just as I am. In the midst of this, going at it alone is not an option. I’m so glad to be travelling this road with you all!

with love…again 😉,
Patrick

Key Takeaways:

• Humor can open the door to deeper self-awareness

• Our “shadows” (hidden parts of ourselves) quietly shape how we think and act

• What we tend to avoid often holds the most insight

• Everyday moments—like cravings or pet chaos—can reveal something meaningful

• Growth starts with acknowledging, not suppressing, what’s beneath the surface

• Authenticity comes from blending honesty, curiosity, and humor

• Life’s messiness isn’t a distraction—it’s part of the work
  

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Upcoming Events:

Virtual Shadow Summit — Saturday, May 2nd at 10am PT (FREE)

Dark Shadows — Sunday, May 17th at 10am PT

The shadow is whatever parts of your personality you feel ashamed or embarrassed of — the things you feel like hiding from other people.

It could be a million different things:
Your appearance. Your ability to speak publicly. Your ability to explain things or talk spontaneously.

There’s lots to explore in the arena of the shadow.

This event came out of how much interest there’s been in shadow work within The Tools™️ organization. We felt we should have a breakout group to dive as deeply as we can into the subject. What’s exciting is this is the first event that’s for the community, led by the community. We have members who are new to shadow work and others who’ve been doing it for quite some time, learning from me and Phil. They’re really skilled at presenting different techniques, different aspects of shadow work that are valuable to know about.

It’s not one size fits all. We have presenters exploring the shadow through dream work, couples work, creative writing, and even a doctor or two offering their perspective—plus many other approaches. You’ll find something that resonates and makes you think, “that’s a great way for me to do shadow work.”

The event is free. We want to make it accessible to everyone. So invite your friends, your family. Let’s get together and make this a recurring community event.

Register for free here —> Virtual Shadow Summit

The finalized program of breakout sessions that will be offered at this summit will be sent out later this week.

And remember: the people with the worst shadows are the ones who deny that they have a shadow. So no more ignoring these shadows. We’re not gonna tolerate anyone denying it 😉

With love,
— Barry & Ashley

Upcoming Events:

Shadow Summit — Saturday, May 2nd at 10am PT

Dark Shadows — Sunday, May 17th at 10am PT

We’re excited for our second meeting this Sunday, April 12th at 9am PT. We’ll spend the hour answering your questions and supporting you in working on whatever issues you're facing.

Please use the link below to join us, and let us know if you have any questions or concerns.

With love,
Barry & Ashley

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