We have arrived at a new month and a new practice to try on … at the beach. This exploration invites you to do a scan of your skeletal system honoring the element of mineral. Malidoma Somé, a beloved spiritual teacher & ancestor introduced this element that reminds us of what our bones know.

“Mineral is elemental energy that allow…

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Two years ago, I was invited to teach Gentle Hatha and Restorative Yoga classes for the Healing While Black Retreat in Costa Rica. This inaugural retreat was hosted by The Soulfulness Center led by the magnificent and brilliant, Dr. Shelly Harnell.

Dr. Shelly and I met years before when I chose to uproot my life - leaving my secure job as a Healing Justice Program Director & moving out of my apartment in Oakland with no strategic plan. I was feeling guarded, socially awkward & impatient to heal my wounds at that time. I thank her so much for seeing my wholeness despite those un-sparkly characteristics.

A few years later after our initial meeting, I received an email from her inviting me to teach yoga at the Blue Spirit Retreat Center. I dramatically gasped. We were going to be at a remarkable site with 60+ Black healers, therapists, dancers, & writers. The sacredness of this convening was not lost on me. My body screamed YES before the fear & anxiousness got woken up from their long nap.

It was my first international retreat as a Yoga teacher and the range of emotions was as diverse & dense as the jungle herself. I attempted to calm my nerves by “reassuring” myself that only a handful of people would likely attend the classes. “They didn’t know anything about me so why would they come.” Besides that weird strategy, I felt so much excitement to guide the group.

God / Spirit always has a way of reminding me that I’m not in control as every class was filled with the warmth of cinnamon, ginger and nutmeg in all its rich embodied flavors. Rows of melanated beings showed up for each class ready to flow and rest together.

I’ll never forget the bright smiles that awakened my spirit and changed my cellular structure. The energy was soft, purposeful, present & trusting which invited me into bringing my best imperfectly rooted self. I felt engulfed by love in a way that I hadn’t experienced before in any other “teaching” role.

That retreat experience directly challenged the stories within me that I wasn’t supposed to be on a healer team of well known spiritual leaders. I can say that is has taken many years to not feel the same panic, insecurity and fear when I began teaching.

I recorded myself ( see below) to celebrate both moving through fear and the relief from an intense migraine.

This video refills me with the memory of what I’m capable of doing in nourishing environments. The eyes of each student felt like a collective request to touch the wound with love and I hope they felt the same from me as well.

These experiences make me look imposter syndrome straight in the face like the liar it really is. It’s not just a liar. Imposter syndrome is anti-Black! Because the brilliance of Black people expands across oceans, timelines, sectors & cosmic shifts.

The humbling season that i’ve been navigating lately has brought me so intimately close with past wounds of inadequacy. It has brought me to my knees in surrendered prayer and granted an opportunity to strengthen my root systems with my own love and that of others that have nutrient rich soil to share.

In a culture that is always striving to get ahead of others, let’s take a moment to celebrate where we’ve been and who we are in this moment. If you are currently squaring up with your fears, doubts and self criticisms, remember that your bravery makes you so badass! This inner work will help bring forth a more liberated future that we are smart enough & more than capable of creating.

Well done, beloveds. Well done.

I acknowledge that I studied Hatha and Restorative Yoga (in the West) and it is not my direct ancestral lineage. I’m holding many prayers that we elevate South Asian educators to the front & center!

Here are a few leaders to study, support, pay and take classes from:

• Susanna Barkataki www.susannabarkataki.com

• Tejal Patel www.tejalyoga.com

• Anjali Rao www.anjalikamathrao.com

After we feel what we are longing for, we will explore a simple mindfulness excercise with…

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In November 2025, I went to New Orleans thinking I was going to get saved and she revealed what I needed to really look at. She shook the shit out of this small town California Poppy and I’m immensely grateful for this form of love.

Now, the health scare has a name (complex migraines // migraines with aura) and i’m emerging into the medicine woman I knew I could be.

My spirit led trip to New Orleans was nothing like I expected. I met my most insecure, wounded and exhausted self. I met the versions of me that were seeking validation from every Black person I encountered and wanting every queer person to find me desirable. Upon reflection, I was unconsciously praying for the land to beckon me to stay and continue fleeing from myself.

During that month, my body became so shaky & my mind dizzy (from vertigo). The heart palpitations started and I had crying spells that were unusual even for a proud cry baby. Some days, I couldn’t even find the words to engage with people. On other occasions, I was completely ignored by strangers that I desperately sought approval from. I wish I was exaggerating but at multiple events there was no acknowledgement of my presence. I felt the ways it touched a desire for belonging that was beyond my individual life.

One day, I decided to treat myself and spend a few hours at a Queer community pool. Spirit had another plan for me as I ended up with an excruciating wasp sting and an expensive trip to urgent care hours later. The combination of staying in a smokey home, vertigo, burn out, dehydration, & heart break led to my first episode of a “complex migraine” where my major functions protest at the same time.

The sting was significant because it revealed a loyalty to a housing situation that left me struggling for breath. A loyalty that is not uncommon to unhealthy relationship dynamics that I find myself in. I googled the symbolism of the wasp and read many intriguing articles. One that stood out was from Saul Kuperstein, “The spiritual meaning of a wasp bite is an alert from the divine, a wake up call …”

When I returned home to the Bay Area, I felt internally bruised and bewildered. I had negative $134.50 in my bank account, a broken heart, dizzy spells, and bitter thoughts about what I had just experienced. The painful breakup felt like an even fresher wound since I hadn’t really nurtured or tended to the grief while I was away.

I found myself spending hours in my kitchen making herbal medicine of all types. Creative winds moved through me every night keeping me up until 3am. I made teas, pain relief salves, spiritual baths and tinctures to support my whole being. Each one of the herbs felt guided by my spirit team leading me to find the type of support I needed to cope with the big feelings & inflammation .

Sample of my herbal medicines: Sweet Fire Pain Relief, Womb comfort, Spiritual Protection and Rooted in Love Tea Blend

While I inherited many gifts from my ancestral lineage, herbalism was not passed down through oral transmission. I often found myself looking to spiritual teachers to fulfill the yearning to know my ancestral lands and healing traditions.

Ms. New Orleans blessed me into an initiation process that reminded me to listen to the wisdom within myself. She reminded me that we truly do have what we need right where we are but must engage the part that wants to seek an “authority” outside of us as well as the part that wants to run away from our pain.

I’d like to believe that there are lands that deliver potent messages in support of our liberation work. Their messages are reminders that we have the capacity to become the mystical alchemists & fiercely loving protectors of the sacred that the state fears the most. It is an undeniably powerful feeling to embody this truth. May we continue to make the sacred medicine we need for ourselves and communities.

Thank you, New Orleans.

After a recent urgent care visit, I got a diagnosis. “You have complex migraines” the Doctor said. The type that can resemble stroke symptoms. While I’m no stranger to the intensity, this is the second time I’ve experienced this kind of scary episode. The vertigo, shortness of breath, disorientation, loss of balance, sweaty palms, chills, slurred speech, blurry vision, sharp pain, & digestion issues are a 0 out of 10 in the fun department.

I wasn’t sure if I felt relief or disappointment to have a name for the wild festivities that have been going off in my brain & body. As I started to reflect about the root causes of emotional and spiritual pain, I was taken back to a profound memory from 2022 where I joined an adventurous group of BIPOC exploring plant medicine in Costa Rica.

I tried my best to prepare through meditation & prayer but I wasn’t quite ready for what was to come. The ceremony that has left a lasting impression on me was where I became one of my West African ancestors. In this ceremony, I experienced her excruciating pain, grief & loneliness for hours.

At my breaking point, I whispered three words across the crackling fire to a beloved participant, “I … am … struggling.” To my surprise, she stood up immediately and walked over to hold me tight. Now, engaging with other participants was against the “protocol of the ceremony” but I don’t know what I would’ve done without that Capricorn’s steady embrace. She couldn’t take the pain away completely but the connection offered a world of relief & healing that touched my ancestral lineage.

In both incidents of the urgent care visit and the medicine ceremony, the quality of care changed my experience of pain. The ache wasn’t as loud as I was met with compassion, care and touch. Over the weekend, it was as if the weight drastically shifted as I sensed the support of my amazing family and exquisite hospital staff.

I wish this was the norm for all my people. Sometimes the sober reality hits hard that there is no scarcity of pain & suffering in the world. On top of that it can feel like a relentless battle with so called “leaders” creating more barriers to quality healthcare and life saving resources.

Even still, I the hold the prayer that we can all become “rule breakers” like the beloved during the medicine ceremony. We have the ability to embody the bold strength of the fire as we extend care to our fellow neighbors. If fire is inaccessible, may we embody the qualities of air to remind others to simply keep breathing.

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Image by Joshua J. Cotten

I spent the morning weeping & shaking in my new church home (?). I’m still trying to get used to a church outside of a forest but there’s so much that keeps me coming back. I’ll start with the Black music ministry, radical Queer & Trans inclusivity, Healing Justice principles & poignant messages about community from Pastor Mike.

Today is the Christian holiday of Pentecost and we were encouraged to wear white. I forgot the memo and showed up in shiny purple. As I walked up to church noticing everybody in their fresh, crisp & fabulous white outfits, I noticed my thoughts shift. A fearful and protective voice emerged suggesting that I wouldn’t fit in because of my choice of clothing.

It’s a small meaningless example but this voice reveals that there’s still a lot of difficult feelings to unpack about the exclusion, harm and violence done by “God loving” people in this country. I feel confusion for the ways people can praise God while in the same breath celebrate bombs dropped on babies, ignore mass starvation and support policies that criminalize gender variant people.

Before the anticipated rejection, I turned to walk back to my car. Just as I reached my door, a hummingbird came within 12 inches of my face.

It felt like a gentle encouragement and loving reminder of belonging.

I said to myself:

• I belong even if i’m wearing a different color.

• I belong even as a queer / same gender loving person.

• I belong even if I’m new to Church protocol.

• I belong even if i’m still processing my relationship to / with God.

It was undeniable that the feeling of radical acceptance carried me through the service. I also accept that my tension with God may not be resolved anytime soon. I have a lot of questions about pain, oppression, violence, trauma & suffering. All I know is that I trust my tears and the way my heart opens up when I’m around soulfully enriched people & environments.

What soulful connections are you inviting in for this new week?

If you are unsure where to begin, I’d love to connect with you. Schedule a free 30 min phone consultation at blackseedsproject.as.me

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I’m in a local cafe on the brink of tears, feeling big waves of tenderness as I write to you today. There is a mix of emotions as I notice the ways my heart is impacted by the sense of urgency & busy-ness. It can be even more confusing when we apply the same fast pace to our interpersonal relationships.

I’ve been so grateful to have opportunities to slow down through my herbal apprenticeship program at a gorgeous farm in the East Bay (Ohlone Territory in California). Every week, we spend 6 hours circling up to learn about our native herbal allies and explore how each plant wants to communicate with us. Some of our Plant kin want to be experienced through tea, flower essence, tincture, salve, cream and /or meditation. This invitation into closeness with our plant family has helped me embody their medicine and reflect on my own needs.

This type of experiential learning environment has been like a playground for highly sensitive beings like myself who need the right size of stimulation mixed with plentiful opportunities to connect to the spiritual realm.

I didn’t have the words for this when I started Black Seeds Project. I created my “One on One mindfulness sessions” hoping it would be a soothing balm for the deep scars of oppression & trauma.

I’ve created personalized ceremonies called Soulful Rest Sessions that intentionally lay down the foundations for emotional safety, vulnerability and intimacy. We expand our capacity for creativity, hope & receptivity to find permanent homes within us. We also give the necessary space & time for messages from source to become clearer.

I find myself interchangeably referring to source as intuition, higher power, mama nature, God, Goddess or Spirit these days. No matter the title, the relationship with divinity requires consistency, presence & intentionality.

Space holding in a personal or professional dynamics is one of the most intimate ways of relating with another. As a devotee and protector of tenderness, I believe that our hearts & bodies yearn to communicate in their sacred languages. This requires our energy to be at a different frequency than the usual day to day. We must find those sanctuaries to really hear, feel, sense and understand the language that us HSBs speak so fluently.

My hope is that we take our time with each other like we would opening a jackfruit. It requires big effort but I want to believe that the nutrient dense, sweet taste is worth it at the end. I love the ways nature teaches us to savor the precious gems like a vulnerable share from another being. It’s hard work to stay in our heart but our sanctuaries can be the rest stops we need along the long path.

Soulful Rest Sessions may be one way to explore an outdoor sanctuary that is designed just for you. Sign up for a free phone consultation at blackseedsproject.as.me.

Here is my my promo video to learn a bit more:

A client asked me about daily rituals and practices to stay tender, present and grounded.

The first thing I shared were the body anointing rituals with the oils, salves & creams I’ve been making lately. I happily brought up my enjoyment for slow nature walks, EFT / Tapping, herbal teas, Ayurvedic foot massages before bed, and rose water.

But, here’s what I would’ve shared if I wasn’t too concerned about sounding like a polished practitioner:

• Talk your sh*t in an unfiltered way to your beloved tree, ocean, pet and / or trusted person

• Start the day with an orga$m and/ or end the day with an orga$m

• Put on something funky like kitten ears & a fly ass one piece then shake somethin in your body. Bonus if you say only nice things about yourself.

• Cry, scream, growl & sing loudly in your car

• Go to your altar with your frustration, desperation, disappointment, anger, & confusion. Let your ancestors feel your authenticity

• Fully embody the chaos. Feel it, create with it and let it move through with the same force.

• Flirt & tell the flowers how pretty they are every time you pass them

• Giggle and squeal at the smallest things you’ve accomplished.

• Give yourself permission to embrace your baby self. Call yourself a [ enter a descriptive phrase ] baby. “I’m a tired of capitalism baby, right now.”

• Get a treat, make a treat & enjoy every bite of that treat

• Hide under the covers when you feel overwhelmed & need to create a sanctuary

• Make herbal medicine and listen for the guidance from the plants. Bonus if you do it in your birthday suit. .. naked.

• Did I say orgasm already?

These are practices that have helped me release old narratives of who I should be as an adult human who happens to be a healing practitioner. They have helped me value the eccentric & playful energy that has always been apart of my personality. I’ve also noticed how they keep me supple & receptive to the flows of life.

Honestly, the invisible Dictator of Perfection should’ve retired many years ago because i’m deeply committed to freedom more than containment & suppression. I’m grateful for those beings who have exemplified how to be spiritually disciplined, pragmatic & flexible in their multidimensionality.

May you find authentic rituals for the unique waves you are surfing / getting uncomfortably humbled by.

It’s not often that I take time to express appreciation for my ex-partners, but I want to offer that here.

Inhale gratitude, Exhale wisdom

They gifted me nicknames inspired from the natural world that set me on a path to self discovery. Here are a few of the most memorable ones:

“Stubborn like tree roots”
“Lady fire”
“A hurricane”

These names reflected versions of me that would surface during conflict. As I reflect on this holy celebration of Earth Day, I have taken the past few years to intentionally accept the invitation to examine those unhealed parts of myself.

The less obvious gift of those nicknames was that they brought me intimately closer to Mama Earth in her immeasurable expressions. Her destruction, beauty, magnificence, and unpredictability. I am all of those things and still have choice in how I move with my elemental nature.

Stepping into self-accountability has asked me to be honest about the ways my earth, fire, water, and air have been out of balance in my relationships.

There was a time in which shame & guilt kept me from owning the harms I’ve caused in the past. I tell myself now that the Earth doesn’t collapse into self-rejection when she shows us what she is capable of doing. I’m curious how to integrate the wisdom of those cycles, the wisdom that fertile soil often succeeds wildfires.

I think of Maya Angelou’s words that, “nothing that is human is alien to me.”
And I imagine she would also say that nothing of the Earth’s cycles is alien, either.

This is what I mean when I say, “I am an elemental force.” As tender as the roots of a sprout, precarious as fire, luscious as spring water newly melted from the mountains, and determined as the breeze that carries seeds for the future.

From time to time, those elements need rebalancing but I trust that I will return to my center or at least be guided back to awareness by the beings who love me.

On this Earth Day, what would it be like to offer yourself grace for being both human and wild?

With loving energy, I howl with you to keep showing up for this messy, relational and liberatory project of surviving in 2026.

Ironically, I can be a little quiet and shy about one of my favorite practices. This one doesn’t quite conjure up images at a peaceful, silent or calm retreat. It feels a little taboo to admit that I love screaming to the rivers, oceans and forests as a therapeutic way of healing.

The first time I discovered my love for this exploration was during a trip visiting my sister in Aotearoa (New Zealand). There was so much energy moving through my whole system that I had tried to manage, control & tame back at home. While I remained disciplined with my morning practice of meditation & journaling, a different kind of nature based intervention was needed.

During a morning practice, I felt an impulse to tell the ocean how I was really feeling with radical honesty, transparency and unfiltered language. I went on ranting, cursing & yelling for hours until it was close to sunset. It made my throat feel raw but my spirit much lighter.

Lately, I’ve been reflecting about chaos as an energy that is demanding our undivided attention. If not given the space, presence or care, it will seep out into our daily lives. When the pulsing, clawing & raw sensations go unaddressed, the distance to ourselves feels much greater. The barriers to stillness feel like oceans apart.

I’m finding a growing curiosity about the deities whose spiritual depths are connected to chaos, destruction, war, healing & transformation. Is it only through a quiet path where we seek enlightenment?

What would containers for our wildness look like? How does it bring us closer to the natural world & embodied freedom?

I am honored to have learned from brilliant minds & wise souls throughout the past decade of being a healing practitioner. Yesterday, I had the opportunity of being with one that invites me into deep observation and immersion into the senses.

The Berkeley Rose Garden has been one of my teachers that I return to in any emotional state reminding me of what is possible when beauty surrounds me. I often find myself being called to this special place when I feel stuck or afraid.

As I observe the Roses, I reflect on the many cultures that create ritual & herbal medicine.

As I observe the Roses, I remember the importance of blooming at my own time.

As I observe the Roses, I soften my desire for controlling life’s circumstances.

The past 6 months have been humbling in my work, relationships & finances. I’ve often been left with overwhelm of how to move forward. I may not have the neuroscience to prove this but the roses absolutely increase my sense of safety, hope, confidence, respect, & humility.

Embodying the heart qualities from our Rose kin may bring forth the connections we need in these times. May you feel the blessings of the Rose today!

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