In this age we live in, though it has always been there; only that it is more now- something is embarrassing about silence. We rush to fill it. During car rides, especially long ones, when you are waiting for class, standing in a lift, sitting beside someone, or even walking with a friend. The list goes on. Everyone feels the need to say something or do something to prevent the silence. It is as though silence has become something we try to avoid and we are expected to fix. Maybe that is why we struggle with quiet people too. Before they even say anything, we have already decided within us who they are.

Why does quietness make us uncomfortable?

Why do we assume that the quiet person is shy, timid, boring, and has nothing much to offer?

Why do we assume that the loudest person in the room is the most confident, the most interesting, or the one with the most to offer?

This is enough to prove that we treat volume as evidence of value. We confuse being noticed with being important, and in doing so, we completely overlook a different kind of presence.

In today's culture as we see it, the world rewards visibility. We are encouraged to be seen and to speak, especially if we want more or want anything at all. Social media gives us the avenue to be seen, to say what's on our mind or what we want people to see, and to say what we intend to say. Personal branding is another form that requires visibility and speaking. This doesn't stop there; networking, speaking up, and sharing opinions require so much visibility, especially if we want to attain the results that we are seeking. Seeing how much we live in a world built to reward visibility, what happens to those people who don't naturally seek it?

Now let's talk about the labels that we give quiet people. We call them shy or insecure even before hearing them speak. We assume they are nervous because they are not displaying confidence in the way we have learnt to see it. We often mistake their silence for uncertainty, hesitation, boredom, and even a lack of personality. We even forget that their silence may mean they are probably listening.

We have failed to see that silence doesn't mean emptiness.

Perhaps if we look at a quiet person's perspective, we could understand things better. The quiet person notices the hesitation when someone speaks; they remember that you take your bread without adding any spread; they notice when that loud classmate doesn't make a bad joke that day or the day you don't talk about that thing. I could go on about examples that highlight how much a quiet person observes

We fail to realize that we have become so good at speaking that we forget to learn how to listen. Both are essential, but one has become much rarer. It's almost as though listening has become one of the quiet forms of charity.

Let's look at how nature itself values the silence we fail to value.

Trees don't need to make a noise to prove that they are growing. Morning doesn't come with applause. The deepest part of the ocean is also the calmest.

I have been called "that quiet girl" more times than I can count. And for a long time, I felt like it was something that I needed to outgrow. But now I realize, being quiet was never the problem, but believing that it needed an explanation.

With all this being said, even though more could have been said, I want you to realize and remind yourself that the most remarkable person may not be the one telling the most intriguing story, the funny jokes, or the one that everyone is listening to. They might be the one sitting quietly in the corner, listening to the one talking, such that the one talking feels seen and heard. We forget that as much as the loud ones can shape the world, the quiet ones shape it as well as understands it first.

Recommended song: "Saturn" by Sleeping at Last