I absolutely loved The Secret Ladies Lives of Church Ladies by Deesha Philyaw. I truly related to many of the characters and stories throughout that short story collection. I couldn’t be happier to have The True Confessions of First Lady Freeman in my hands, and I think it will lend itself to be a fantastic discussion and new ways to further build and interrogate my faith.

A quick description in my own words:

The True Confessions of First Lady Freeman is about Scharisse Freeman, the wife of a popular megachurch pastor who doesn’t fit the traditional idea of a first lady. The church folks say she’s too worldly, harsh and brash. But her childhood bestie says she’s too holy. What is it going to take for her to be accepted? Schar decides to enter the First Lady USA pageant in hopes of gaining acceptance from other pastors’ wives. Unfortunately, she finds herself in the center of a scandal that forces her to confront herself and her role in the church.

My pre-read (Next Post), will be touching on:

• How women in the church navigating desire? In an interview with Elle, Philyaw mentions this is one of the questions the book explores. I’m looking to see how I have navigated desire and how that has shown up in my life as an adult woman.

• Freedom—about getting free, what freedom costs, what silence costs. In the same Elle Interview, Philyaw also claims (Like Church Ladies) the book is about “bout freedom—about getting free, what freedom costs, what silence costs. Those are the parallels in our real life, in this country, in this world, around secrets and harm, and whose secrets we keep, and what it costs women.” I’m really scared and excited to explore this through the main character.

• Shame. This book is also about losing shame and embracing truth so I’m cautiously exploring what shame has done in my life and exploring how I can continue to let it go.

• Womanhood, respectability and belonging- the description leads us to believe Schaffer can’t quite master the performance of womanhood in any group she belongs to. I’m interested in the tension this causes between her true self and who people expect her to be.

• Women, men and power- the description also suggests she has built a business empire of her own. I wonder what this will illustrate about power dynamics in the church and the absurdity of it.

Pre-read materials

• How to read Satire- The True Confessions is a satirical novel. I think it’s important to brush up on the point of satire and it’s techniques to truly get the

• George Saunder’s Humor- Philyaw mentions she attended a satire writer’s workshop and she learned in an interview from George Saunders that you have to love the thing you’re mocking. I’m pretty sure this is the interview she’s referring to.

The next posts: the pre read, midway musings and my post read are for paid subscribers only.

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What is Faith in Revision?

My goal with Faith in Revision is to use books as a lens for examining my faith and identity and also the broader culture at large. I hope anyone who follows this journey also has a safe place to challenge and question their beliefs.

I also bonded with my husband over our shared ministry experience. Faith was always a big part of our connection.

When my Faith took a Turn

Then life happened. In a span of 6 years: Trump was elected to office, COVID-19 shut down the world, my husband and I lost our son at 24 weeks gestation. I lost my uncle to suicide, my grandfathers passed in the same week, my dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s at just 65 years old (same age my grandma was diagnosed). I dealt with multiple pregnancy losses and financial stresses before my daughters were born in 2023 and 2025. We have recently been navigating the challenges of my oldest daughter’s potential Autism diagnosis. Life keeps piling it on.

It’s not that I began to question things— I have always approached my faith inquisitively. But life shook me up a bit. And while I normally found solace in my faith, it was harder for me to make sense of things like I use to before.

Books that Healed Me

Reading books grounded me. I’ll never forget reading Pachinko by Min Jin Lee just a few months after our son passed and a line delivered in the right moment at the right time took my breath away.

Then I remember reading Before I Let Go by Kennedy Ryan where the main character experienced a stillbirth just like me. She was able to describe the pain, grief and hurt in words I could have never described. It truly helped healed me and I credit it to helping pull me out of a deep depression.

Reading these books made me realize that I was entering a new season of exercising my faith. I realized that healing wasn’t limited to the four walls of the church or in the pages of the Bible that I was use to. Just because I wasn’t in church the way I was, doesn’t mean I wasn’t still growing in my faith. I was always taught that it’s the Word of God and only the Word of God that heals. But I believe God can use anything to meet you where you are. For me, that was in the pages of books. And oftentimes they were not even faith-based books.

The Journey Continues

I want to continue this journey in a more intentional way. I plan to blog through my experiences reading certain books to help me make sense of things that are hard for me where I normally would have sought answers through the traditional means of my faith. Through novels, memoirs, and literary fiction, I hope to better understand my personal struggles like:

• Parenting through my daughters’ developmental journeys and my oldest daughter’s autism diagnosis

• My dad’s failing health due to dementia and wrestling with this strange type of grief

• Dealing with the complicated nature of my relationship with mom

• Navigating the joys, disappointments and complexities of my marriage

• Feeling burnt out, overwhelmed

• Learning how suffering, uncertainty and unanswered questions shape my faith

As I continue to grow and develop my faith. I want to navigate:

• Womanhood as it relates to gender roles and the expectations I’ve inherited

• Patriarchal systems and religious influenced by perception and understanding of God

• Race, gender, class and culture influence the way faith is practiced and experienced

• Faith as liberation, comfort, control, obligation

• Genuine community and what that looks like

• Holding doubt and belief together

• What kind of faith remains after certainty fades

Through this pursuit I hope to find peace, but not by collecting the “right” answers. I want to learn more about myself and continue to become more set in who I am and what I believe. Most importantly I want to remain open to growth when my beliefs are challenged. This new section of my blog will be called:

Faith in Revision: Reading, Questioning, and Reconstructing What I Believe

If this sounds like something you may also want to explore, or you’re interested in my journey, I would love for you to subscribe! Because of the very personal and sensitive matter of this content, Faith in Revision will have a monthly subscription fee of $8.00 or $80 annually.

Every month paid subscribers will receive:

• A Pre-Reading Reflection Post: Before I begin each book, I will be answering questions about my assumptions, relationship to the theme, and the questions I’m carrying

• Midway Musings: A mid-book journey where I share what’s standing out so far. This could be characters I’m wrestling with, passages I’ve underlined, theories I’m developing while I’m reading.

• A Post Reading Reflection: After I finish the book, I’ll write about what challenged me, how my assumptions shifted, and what questions the book leaves me with.

• Companion Reading Guide: An accompanying PDF reading guide for you to answer the questions yourself alongside me.

• Quote Journal: My real annotations and quotes from the book

• Beyond the Reading List: Short reflections from other books I’m reading beyond the monthly book selection that I wasn’t reading for fait but unexpectedly made me think about it.

And of course, I’m hoping there will be rich commentary and discussions in the subscriber only comment section! I would love to hear your feedback, compare interpretations and even disagree respectfully.

Content Calendar

(Subject to Change). Posts will be sent Thursday of each week.

I hope you join me on this journey of growth and revelation.

More Than a Family Drama

Lost Lambs by Madeline Cash is about how family issues are often connected to a web of more complex social and systemic failures. A husband and wife are not just partners. Moms and dads aren’t just parents. Kids are not just sons and daughters. The dysfunctions of family often extend beyond the four walls of the home. What this book does is share how families under capitalist ideals is an extremely powerful catalyst to either a productive and safe society or a harmful one.

Meet the Flynns

It sounds like a lot, but I was surprised at how the narrative unfolded into a thoughtfully crafted story of a traditional family and the ripple effect of their loneliness that extends beyond their home. How can a family of 5 feel so isolated and unseen? The Flynn family offers us a glimpse of the not so glamorous lifestyle of a traditional American family. In this family we have a dissatisfied housewife, a lonely husband, and three neglected teen girls. Each chapter gives us a view into their individual POVs and we even get the point of views of some side characters like the town priest and the oldest daughter’s adult boyfriend.

Even though the book has multiple characters and multiple points of views, there was a cohesive element to the story. Themes of isolation, loneliness, finding oneself and how we try different means when we are trying to find fulfillment . The middle daughter, Louise, for example feels isolated and overlooked by everyone so she seeks connection online and connects with anyone who will give her attention. All she wants is a boyfriend and will adapt to any belief system to be accepted and seen. So naturally, she befriends a man who convinces her to build a bomb.

Balancing Serious Themes With Humor and Wit

Lost Lambs examines how life, family and our circumstances can sometimes lead us to a pursuit that isn’t necessarily what we thought it would be. It demonstrates how that pursuit doesn’t always bring us fulfillment in a way we thought it might. And what influences these pursuits? None other than capitalism and misogyny, of course.

I enjoyed the way this novel set the main characters against the backdrop a seemingly normal traditional suburban life while they navigate their own issues of identity, loneliness, and desire. Simply put, Lost Lambs explores what it means to be… lost.

Bud Flynn, the father of the American family joins a church group (called Lost Lambs) in which the facilitator describes a parable of lambs moving away from the flock. She explains that when lambs stray away too far, it’s more vulnerable to wolves. But sometimes you find another flock. The novel both complicates and extends this message because while the characters stray, they are actually seeking safety in a way, but sometimes unknowingly get themselves into more danger.

Even though yearning of human connection is central to this book, the implications of capitalism and commentary on misogyny and the objectification of women are also key themes. The humorous, wry and witty way the author explores these themes is smart and made it an enjoyable and easy read. It’s not necessarily taking a stance on any of these matters, rather pointing them out in an ironic way.

It’s also a bit of a genre bending novel because there’s a somewhat of a mysterious subplot in that a billionaire is up to some nefarious activities that the community is unaware of. Again, the through-line here is capitalism and the pursuit of wealth, wholeness and identity. This family in all their dysfunction ends up being at the center of a major town controversy. I think the way Cash used this sub plot to further advance the narrative was smart.

Final thoughts

Ultimately I enjoyed this book, and I think it’s an impressive debut. I found it funny, original and thoughtful. I chuckled every time the girls’ school “Our lady of suffering” was mentioned. The Lost Lamb leader name being Miss Winkle with a daughter named Perry is hilarious to me. There were some quirky and funny one liners that made me laugh days after reading. That said, I think some may find the humor in this book cheesy and a bit off putting. I think it’s wise to not approach this book too seriously and have fun with it.

On Satire and Interpretation

I have to also say, while I think this is a satirical portrayal of the American family, the author (from what I’ve read) has never described it as such. I believe there is much to be said about the literary interpretations of the novel. A good discussion can be made here about what did people perceive vs author intent. Although I think this mostly succeeded as a work of satire, I think any criticism about the execution is legitimate. There has been some criticism of why Cash chose certain characters and assigned stereotypical and harmful motivations to them. It was something that didn’t cross my mind while reading, but I understand it.

Jamilah Lemieux is a strong and notable voice in the black feminist space and has been for a long time. She’s an accomplished writer with work featured in very prominent publications such as Essence, the New York Times and the Washington Post. Among many other things, she’s a sought after public speaker and cultural commenter. It’s no surprise with that résumé, she would go on to write a book that centers race, gender and motherhood. Black. Single. Mother. was published in 2026, making waves through the internet and I couldn’t resist reading for myself. While I’m not a single mother myself, I am a black mother, and I am deeply interested in examining many topics through a black feminist framework. So I was excited to see what I would gain from Jamilah’s insight in an area she is seen as an expert in.

The strongest parts of the book were the deeply personal ones. I especially loved the way Jamilah wrote about and to her daughter. Some of the most moving passages centered on her journey into single motherhood and her reflections on being raised by a single mother herself. Those moments felt vulnerable, funny, and honest. More than anything, I appreciated her insistence that motherhood is worthy of admiration and that our children deserve to be celebrated. That’s a message every mother—single or not—needs to hear.

Through the lens of her own life, Jamilah tells the story of what it means for her to become a Black single mother. I think women who share similar experiences will absolutely feel seen in these pages. In a recent interview with BET, Jamilah herself says the book evolved from what she thought it would be. It was supposed to be an expert driven deep dive, but she decided to focus on sharing her story.

Ironically, that’s also where the book fell short for me.

I kept waiting for the book to zoom out beyond Jamilah’s personal story and engage more deeply with Black single motherhood as a social, cultural, and structural issue. I wanted her lived experience to serve as the starting point for broader conversations informed by research, sociology, and history. Instead, much of the analysis relied on quoting other authors rather than developing original insights of her own. There is analysis here, but I rarely felt like it moved beyond ideas I’d encountered elsewhere.

The book also became somewhat repetitive. Jamilah returns several times to the realization that many married women are effectively “married single mothers,” and she revisits her feelings of failure, her desire to bring with a man, and her gradual acceptance of her identity as a single mother. These are meaningful themes, but they often circled back to the same conclusions rather than evolving into something deeper.

There were also several compelling topics that I wish had been explored further. For example, her discussion of the lack of affordable childcare could have opened up a much richer conversation about the realities of Black single motherhood, the role of community care, and the systems that shape mothers’ lives. Instead, those moments felt more like her personal musings rather than full explorations.

I did enjoy the inclusion of stories from 21 other Black single mothers. Bringing in additional voices broadened the perspective beyond Jamilah’s own experience, but even those sections left me wanting more. Rather than having each woman simply recount her story, I think the book would have been stronger if each contribution had focused on a specific theme—co-parenting, finances, dating, community, identity, childcare, grief, or joy. That structure could have created a more layered understanding of the diversity within Black single motherhood.

Ultimately, I think my expectations played a role in my disappointment. Jamilah tells readers in the introduction that she is not an anthropologist, historian, or academic, and in hindsight I was expecting a book she never claimed to write.

This works best as a memoir—a personal reckoning with becoming a Black single mother—rather than as a cultural critique or a work of feminist theory. Judged on those terms, I think it’s successful. But readers looking for a deeper examination of Black motherhood, supported by sociology or feminist scholarship, will probably find more of what they’re looking for in many of the books Jamilah references throughout the text and includes in her reading list.

Overall, I came away appreciating Jamilah’s honesty and vulnerability, even if I was left wanting a broader and more analytical exploration of the subject.

They are Criminalized Survivors. That is what author and award-winning journalist, Justine van der Leun calls out in her newly released book, Unreasonable Women: Three stories of violence, Imprisonment and Extraordinary Survival. This recently released book analyzes how there is a large population of women in prison who, in self-defense, committed an act of violence to survive and/or protect their loved ones from harm.

How does she know? She asked. Leun sent 10,000 letters to women in prison and received over 1,000 responses. What did those responses show? At least 30% of women in prison for murder or manslaughter are Criminalized Survivors. That means these women are not in prison because they are a true threat to society, rather, they are there for trying to stay alive.

Her data shows how these women often have a horrifying commonality— they are victims of sexual abuse and abandonment from a very young age. Her research process was quite arduous because she hand-coded each letter to understand their pathways into prison. Her book profiles, in detail, three women that stood out to her in her research process.

These three stories along with van der Leun’s research, inclusion of historical context and expert storytelling make for an incredibly compelling and propulsive book from start to finish.

I love when books are in conversation with each other. And as I read Unreasonable Women many books came to mind that I thought would pair well with it. If you have read any of the books below, I think you will like Unreasonable Women too.

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When Crack was King by Donavan Mitchell

If you like the way Mitchell was able to strategically chronicle the crack epidemic through exploring the lives of four individuals with different stakes and experiences of that time period, you will also love how van der Leun weaves both personal stories of three different women and original research to uncover why women are in prison for defending themselves against their abusers. The way these books are written are my favorite types of narrative nonfiction because you get a story but it’s real so it doesn’t feel like you’re just reading a textbook history lesson. They also don’t treat the people they profile as case studies, and I appreciate that angle because it feels like we are sitting down with them and hearing what they have say.

The Undocumented Americans by Karla Cornejo Villavicencio

This book totally changed me, and I still think about it today because it has framed how I view immigration. In a time where the current administration is villainizing undocumented Americans, this book humanizes them and gives them a voice. It’s powerful. In the same way, van der Leun has changed my perspective on how victims of abuse are left unprotected by justice system. She gives the women who are incarcerated for trying to protect themselves a voice, and it has changed the way I view how the system treats women who commit violent crimes at hands of their abusers.

Just Pursuit by Laura Coates

This is one of the most underrated books I’ve read, and there is one particular chapter I couldn’t stop thinking about when I was reading Unreasonable Women. Laura Coates is a prosecutor, and in Just Pursuit she uses her experiences to expose the inconsistences and flat-out unfairness of the justice system. In chapter 4, “She Needed Me to Believe her” Coates tells the story of a domestic violence survivor she was representing. As they were getting ready to go before the grand jury, she had a vulnerable moment with the victim in which she realized the victim was afraid she would not be believed. “Our society denies the prevalence of domestic violence and actively seeks to discredit its victims. Perhaps it’s a subconscious refusal to acknowledge that type of cruelty. Perhaps we fall victim to our assumptions about the choices people make, or left with” Just Pursuit, page 68.

One thing I really appreciate about Unreasonable Women is that van der Leun doesn’t shy away from sharing she may not ever get to the objective truth and the trouble with memory especially when it involves traumatic events. But unlike Coates’s victim, the women that van der Leun’s profiled did not get the opportunity to prosecute their abusers in court. It made me think how different their stories may be had they had that chance. If you read Just Pursuit and was just as shocked as I was to hear from someone on the front lines of the court system how messed up it is, I think you’ll appreciate getting a deep dive in the delicate predicament women who feel they are left with no choice are.

Unbound by Tarana Burke

The founder of the Me Too movement wrote this compelling memoir, giving us a deep dive into her history of childhood abuse and why she fights so hard, particularly for black and brown girls who are also victims of sexual abuse. The girls that Tarana Burke advocate for are who the women profiled in Unreasonable women sometimes can turn out to be, which further underscores why her advocacy work is so important. The first part of Unreasonable Women is dedicated to the girlhood of the women van der Leun profiles. If these types of stories are important to you, I believe you will find Unreasonable Women essential.

Sad Tiger by Niege Sinno

Van der Leun references this book to examine the effects of childhood sexual abuse on women. Roxane Gay’s Goodread’s review of this book says “This was not only a memoir about surviving childhood sexual abuse but also an incisive work of cultural criticism. The style and structure are quite unique. I’ve never read a book like this that is so wry and haunted and clear-eyed. It’s another reminder of how pernicious this kind of violence is and how comfortable out culture is with allowing it.”

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What do all of these books have in common? They all seek to center stories of marginalized and underrepresented people who deserve to have their stories told with greater context and empathy. They provide a burning platform for change and warn of the implications of what will happen if stories like these continue to happen.

This ranking was harder than I thought because I have enjoyed most of what I read so here’s my ranking to least favorite to most favorite.

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13 All the Way to the River by Elizabeth Gilbert (audio, library)

Curiosity got me. The best way I can describe this book is a train wreck. A horrible display of privilege and outright arrogance. The most self-serving memoir I’ve ever read. But my God— I could not stop listening!

12 So You Wanna be on Top? by Sarah Hartshone (audio)

I enjoyed the behind-the-scenes musings of one of my favorite shows as a teenager in the 2000s. Sarah humorously delivers a solid account of her experience on America’s Next Top Model. It was a good time, and I recommend to the show’s fans.

11 People We Meet on Vacation by Emily Henry (ebook)

I mean… this was cute and fun. I watched the movie shortly after and generally had a good time with it. I totally get the Emily Henry hype. The banter between characters is always really fun to read. I have to admit— it was a bit boring at times, but I still enjoyed it. I appreciate the voyage through different vaction destinations this took us through. This is a great choice for a summer read.

10 Strangers: A Memoir of Marriage by Belle Burden (audio)

The Buzziest book of the year— by far. I, too devoured this one, but I’m honestly not as crazy about it as others are making it. She wrote a good story, but I think her connections and status is what landed her a book deal. Otherwise nobody would really care. Nothing was special about this book. I don’t get why everyone is so enamored with it.

9 The Untelling by Tayari Jones (paperback)

I enjoyed reading this, but I’m still unsure what it’s about. Tayari Jones is just such a natural at examining the unseen intricacies of black people navigating life after trauma. And in this book we see the subtle ways tragedy can shape the future of survivors. It’s a good read but not Tayari’s best.

8 The White Hot by Quiara Alegria Hudes (hardcover, library)

And when it comes to feminine rage, I’ll read it! I enjoyed the expository style of this novel where a mother pens a letter to her daughter on why she left. I can see this being a good book club pick because there would be many opinons on the motivations and outcome of the mother’s decisions. The writing was also really top tier.

7 Leaving Atlanta by Tayari Jones (ebook)

The perfect way to explore an obscure historical event: The Atlanta Child Murders of 1979. This book is a masterclass in different POVs and writing characters with distinct voices. A brilliant work. It’s not often I read books from a child’s POV, but I really think Tayari nailed this.

6 Is This a Cry for Help by Emily Austin (Library, Hardcover)

I really like when books like these take the more mundane things of life and make really astute and poignant observations about life and society. This was so funny and clever, but at the same time it was also pretty deep… but in a lighthearted way. Great writing, and a great story.

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5 Dominion by Addie Citchens (hardback)

The more I distance I put between myself and this book, the more I really like and appreciate it. I had issues with feeling like the setting was a bit underdeveloped at first, but now I see more clearly what Addie was trying to accomplish with this story. I have thought about it often since finishing and how unchecked toxic masculinity effects communities and the women that love them.

4 Who’s Watching Shorty by Reshona Landfair (audio)

This is what happens when victims of traumatic, life-altering experiences write a memoir from a healed and whole place, not revenge or bitterness. This is the memoir of the girl everyone knew has the underage young girl R Kelly peed on. I would really urge readers to approach this story with a tender heart, not a way to get the “tea.” Because this really about and for victims of abuse and sexual violence. It was hard to listen to at times, but very necessary.

3 The Waterbearers: a Memoir of Mother’s and Daughters by Sasha Bonet (library, hardcover)

I’m a memoir lover—especially as it relates to mothers and daughters—so it’s no surprise this landed in my top 3. It’s really a blend of black history, family biography and memoir in which the author starts her story with her great grandmother in the fields of Louisiana and tells us the stories all that came after her including herself. This book is so tender, but most of all it was honest. It made me more contemplative of my grandmothers and the women in our family.

2 Burn Down Master’s House by Clay Cane (ebook,library)

I love when historical fiction can give me a different perspective of well known historical events. This book was brilliant, well written, well researched and deeply satisfying. The best part is that it humanizes the people who were enslaved as those who had dreams, freedom, education, families and desires. The contents of this book are interconnected stories of different circumstances, and they all lead to one resolution: burn this house down.

1 The Seven Daughters of Dupree by Nikesha (ARC)

I really started off my year with a bang with this one and it’s still my number one read so far. It’s such a layered multi generational story that doesn’t center men, rather, how the answers to our identity are better found through our matriarchal bloodline. It shed light on how so many questions about ourselves can be learned through the truths and vulnerabilities of the mothers before us. I thought it was expertly structured. A hard read sometimes but oh so necessary.

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So what is the mood for spring? For me, when I think of Spring, I think of flowers. What do flowers represent? New beginnings, growth, beauty and love. That’s why I decided to see what other books in my collection have flowers on them and to my surprise, I have around 40 books with floral covers.

I’m really excited about the choices. What I realized is these books don’t just have flowers on the cover. The flowers may represent something important about the book. So I also included a fact about the flowers depicted on the book as a clue to what may be a throughline or theme in the book.

Here’s what I chose and why:

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Kin by Tayari Jones

One of my most anticipated 2026 releases, Tayari Jones is the master of complex characters and a good story to pull at your heartstrings. I’m fully expecting this to be a 5-star read, so my expectations are sky high. I’ve read all of her previous works at this point, and I’m always struck at how easily her prose flows and how thoughtfully she crafts timely and heartfelt stories. This story centers friendship, one of my favorite themes in fiction, and its set in the South. I can’t wait to see how I ultimately end up enjoying this one.

Flower Fact: Yellow flowers ( as depicted on the cover of Kin) mean friendship, joy and sometimes jealousy or infidelity

Cleo Dang Would Rather be Dead by Mi Nguyen (releases April 14)

I read the description of this book and one line stopped me dead in my tracks. “Now a grieving Cleo must navigate life after losing a baby.” It hit a very sore and tender spot for me, and that the pregnancy loss I experienced at 24 weeks gestation. I’m not sure if this going to be therapeutic for me or too hard. But I want to give it a shot. I could use a good, soul cleansing cry.

Flower Fact: Daisys (As depicted on the cover) can symbolize motherhood and motherhood and fertility. Also, the phrase “pushing up daises” is a euphemism meaning to be dead and buried.

Where the Wildflowers Grow by Terah Shelton Harris

I keep seeing this beautiful book on my timeline, and something keeps pulling me towards it. And it’s not just the colorful floral cover. When I see people mention this book, they seem to be expressing a deep appreciation for the way this book captures grief. The exploration of grief is another topic that I gravitate towards in literature.

Flower Fact: Wildflowers symbolize freedom, resilience and untamed natural beauty, often representing the ability to thrive in unexpected, uncultivated places.

We Don’t Talk about Carol by Kristen L Berry

I’m on the hunt for a 5 star thriller and this one comes highly recommended. It seems to hit on some common themes I often gravitate towards in books: marriage, motherhood and generational trauma. This genre is never the avenue through which I read these themes, so I hope I can appreciate the meaning and the message while being entertained too.

Flower Fact: Blue Hydrangeas often represent sorrow and grief

Shark Heart: A Love Story by Emily Habeck

This book came highly recommended and I always found the description strange. A man finds out he’s going to turn into a shark? Huh? But it seems like everyone who reads this has been changed in some way and I love a book that impacts my outlook on life.

Flower Fact: flowers often represent, beauty, growth, and love. But they are also temporary. They die, wither and eventually cease to exist. So they represent the complexity of life and death too.

Happy Land by Dolan Perkins

I was so touched by Dolan Perkins’s novel, Take my Hand so it was a no brainer to buy her latest release. I always appreciate reading Historical fiction that depicts African American heritage, especially when it teaches me something new. So I’m really curious about what I’ll learn in this.

Flower Fact: a floral crown can represent honor, femininity, softness and strength. It also can represent cultural memory and connection to one’s land.

When Forty Blooms by Jacinta Howard

We need more romance books that center women in their 40s! I love a second chance romance, plus this features a successful black woman in her 40s. I can’t wait!

Flower Fact: a well established peony plant can bloom for generations

Magical/Realism: Essays on Music, Memory, Fantasy, and Borders by Vanessa Angélica Villarreal

An essay collection that explores culture, race and identity is always going to catch my attention. I’ve been eying this book since it was long listed for a National Book Award and I think it is finally time I see what it’s about.

Flower Fact: gardens often symbolize what we inherit and what has been cultivated over generations

Shine Bright: A Very Personal History of Black Women in Pop by Danyel Smith

I think it’s time we give black women in pop their flowers. I’m admittedly not a huge music fan, but I have a keen interest in black woman’s stake in history. This has been on my list for a while so it’s past time I get to it.

Flower Fact: some flowers only bloom at night

Everyone is Beautiful: A Novel by Katherine Center

Okay I’ve never read this author before but the description made me immediately add to this list because it feels painfully relatable. A mom wanting to feel like herself again? Sign me up because, baby, me too! A hope it’s a feel good story and not too devastating.

Flower Fact: Lily of the valley is a classic wedding flower because it symbolizes “the return of happiness”

Let me know if you’ve read any of these books or if you plan on reading any of them

This particular story is one we all know, but as she says: people were looking but nobody was watching. Reshona Landfair was the center of R Kelly’s child pornography case as the 14 year old girl in the leaked “sex tape” which shows R Kelly degrading and humiliating her body. We heard the jokes. Dave Chapelle had an entire stand up about it. But now she is no longer wearing that shame on her shoulders. This is her story in her own words

Reshona does an excellent job of sharing her experience. We get to know who she was a young girl growing up in a family of musicians dreaming to have a rap career of her own. She describes her first interactions with R Kelly and goes us insight to the progression of their relationship. It gets very hard to read about their interactions.

There are some chilling moments in which she speaks directly to the reader and urges you to reflect and challenge your own biases and beliefs not just regarding her publicized experience but violence against women and children in general. Her account of the abuse she suffered under the vile hand of R Kelly demands that you don’t just hear about it, but you witness it. It’s a tough read, but you can’t and shouldn’t look away. I truly believe reading this book is a necessary step towards justice.

You can tell she wrote this book from a true place of healing. She doesn’t gloss over details and seems to be speaking in authentic honesty. She is not trying to convince the skeptics and she is not bitter towards the die hard R Kelly Fans. This truly isn’t a tool of vengeance, and because of that, she wrote a solid memoir that will evoke so much emotion in your heart.

I think readers will be surprised at her posture towards her family. There is great detail on how her aunt Sparkle (Stephanie) introduced her to R Kelly and the breakdown of their relationship and Sparkle’s career. She also speaks a lot about her father (who is now deceased) and how she wishes he would have exercised more discernment in her dealings with R Kelly. It adds a very complicated layer to her story and I’m glad she balanced holding them accountable but also showing them grace as well. That’s how you know she truly has done the work to heal.

I am sincerely inspired and impressed by Reshona and her journey to truly heal. In the end she says her cracks are filled with gold. She has truly turned something horrific, beautiful in its own way.

I highly recommend this one, and I think she did a great job narrating the audiobook.

Check out her interview with Rolling Stone for more details: https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-features/r-kelly-reshona-landfair-jane-doe-tape-trial-interview-1235504614/

Although I’m not a “beach read” type of reader, I had some fun with my reading. I found myself laughing and kicking my way through some smutty romance (Plus Size Player by Danielle Allen) and laugh out loud contemporary fiction (Francine’s Spectacular Crash and Burn by Renee Swindle).

True to my personal reading tastes, I read two memoirs (This is Your Mother by Erika J Simpson and Matriarch by Tina Knowles). I stepped outside my comfort zone a bit and read about the internal struggles of white young adults in London (Evenings and Weekends by Osisín McKenna). Opposite of that, I read a novel centering the experience of black students attending a PWI in London (Honey & Spice by Bolu Babalola) .

I finally got to some books that have been on my TBR for awhile (Skin and Bones by Renee Watson and Sorrow and Bliss by Meg Mason). Skin and Bones was a standout 5 star read for me. I read Sorrow and Bliss with a book club and really appreciated the themes of mental health and motherhood. I ventured into light sci-fi/dystopian (The School for Good Mothers by Jessamine Chan) for the same book club. That one is going to stay with me for awhile.

The Standouts

• Which book was my favorite this season?

Skin and Bones by Renee Watson was layered with themes of motherhood, identity, forgiveness, grief and friendship but it never felt like too much for one book. The way these themes were explored felt authentic and I loved the way it was written.

• Which book surprised me the most (in a good or bad way)?

I did not think I was going to like Evenings and Weekends and although I thought the ending was poorly done, I’m surprised at how invested I became in each character and their growth. I didn’t think I was going to care much. There was a big theme of struggling with identity, particularly sexuality that was interesting and kept me wanting to read more. This was the first pick of Jack Edward’s Inklings book club so that’s why I decided to read.

I was also pleasantly surprised with Matriarch. I approached the book thinking Tina probably wouldn’t be too transparent. Celebrity memoirs are so hit or miss but Tina did a very nice job with her memoir. I really enjoyed the beginning where she recollected on her childhood and the racism she and her family experienced. I also appreciated her candor about marriage

• Which character stayed with me the longest?

Frida Liu from School of Good Mothers, for sure. I had a very visceral reaction to this dystopian novel about mothers who have to go to a sort of a reform school when they’re caught making parental mistakes. It was heartbreaking and I cried at the end. It’s such good social commentary about the state of motherhood and the unsustainable expectations placed on moms.

Looking ahead

The Looking Ahead

• What did this season’s reading teach me about my taste?

I am really starting to understand my tastes in fiction a lot more than I did in the past, and I appreciate literary fiction much more.

• Do I want to carry any particular author/genre into my next season of reading?

I know when I want good romance and funny banter, Danielle is my girl

• What’s one book I already know I want to read next season?

I can’t wait to read Sweet Heat by Bolu Babalola, the follow up to Homey and Spice

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Structurally each chapter is divided by days left to election day which I thought worked very well. It was almost like diary entries, but void of any really deep emotional connection to the topic, which is the first critique I have of the book— Kamala I needed you to call yourself in like you were calling people out, boo. There were times where she was teetering on the edge of deep introspection and vulnerability but she didn’t quite take the leap. I suspect this is why she doesn’t really want to call it a memoir. The closest she got was when she talked about the time she and her husband had to address the emotional distance between them and commit to fighting together, not each other. But there’s one part in the book where she addresses the democratic national convention and the decision to not include a Palestinian voice. This was a huge point of contention among her supporters. Instead of calling herself in, she simply quotes a speech writer’s glowing review of her speech and moves on. She did this several times in true lawyerly fashion— make a point and defend it with evidence instead of true reflection on the matter. For me, this is a huge miss.

Still, I have to say this is a very well written and engaging memoir. Her personal interactions and candid thoughts about Trump and Biden, behind the scenes insight of working with her team, and some explanation of why some decisions were made make it a worth the read for sure. She had a right to call people out. She expressed her hurt and disappointment of not being endorsed by her home town publication, LA Times, and also Washington Post not following suit. Although this reflection is probably the closest she got to vulnerability, it is missing the heart and emotional depth I look for in a memoir. The tone is very defensive, and it felt like she wrote this book to defend herself. Listen, I truly don’t blame her one bit. I actually think writing the memoir in this way is somewhat appropriate and authentic to who she is. But it doesn’t make for a “great” memoir. Her entire premise seems to be “I did everything I could but it’s others around me that made this fail.”

While she does take accountability in some areas, there are other areas where she really doesn’t even try to do some critical self analysis on matters that really mattered to Americans. There was some deflection, complaining and even blame that I am sure comes from a place of validity but again not balanced well with her own personal and meaningful introspection.

I think had she spent a little more time reflecting, we would have had a deeper memoir. Overall, I really enjoyed this book and definitely recommend

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In Sorrow and Bliss, we see how years of an unnamed mental health issue shapes the life Martha, a 40-year-old British woman. She marries her childhood family friend, Patrick, only to realize that the challenges with her mental health, which began in her teenage years, continue to influence her life and family in profound ways. But one day, she experiences a significant breakthrough when she finds another psychiatrist that finally identifies the mental issues she’s always been burdened by and prescribes her medication that actually works. So much time had already passed by the time she finally got answers. She had been seen by multiple doctors and prescribed multiple medicine. Seeing how Martha’s life unfolds was truly hard to read sometimes but it underscores the importance of proper behavioral health care.

What this book offers is a very real portrait of what it’s like to live with mental health challenges and how it impacts your relationships and desires. It highlights how everything, including who you are attracted to and the decisions you make are heavily influenced by something that is often not quite understood, even by health professionals. And that’s the thing with a Martha— everyone knows there’s something wrong with her but nobody is quite sure what it is… until they do.

I like that this book sheds light on not just the mental illness, but how the stigma of mental illness can be just as damaging to the individual as the disease itself. In this book we see how the perception of the disease is often the very thing that can cause so much turmoil. Proper diagnosis and understanding of mental illness can make a world of difference in the individual’s quality of life. It uncovers how mental health plays an important role in communication, and how communication can be the breaking point of a relationship. But especially marriage.

Martha was married twice, but it’s her second marriage where the true extent of her health issues become more apparent. Her husband, Patrick, seems to be more passive about Martha’s health issues at first, but as she becomes more volatile he becomes more distant and detached from the marriage. This in large part has to do with their difficulties in having open and honest communication with each other. A big topic of discussion where they struggle with honesty is motherhood.

I think the subject of becoming a mother in this book is used to juxtapose Martha’s feeling of being broken to a very natural and normal part of being a grown woman, that is the desire to be a mom. Martha believes that she is too broken to be a mom. But we see her sister, who does not struggle with mental health issues, become a mother to multiple kids who Martha adores. In the end, we see Martha is not the broken woman she thinks she is and the desire of motherhood is used to bring this to a resolve.

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I liked the book even though I felt it dragged a little in the beginning. The last 40% when she is finally diagnosed really made this book jump from a 3 to 4 Stars. Martha has a very visceral reaction to her diagnosis and it really makes everything that occurred in the book prior to this point come together.

Sorrow and Bliss very well written, using foreshadowing really well to guide the storyline to the central theme—the isolating nature of mental illness. It also uses wry humor really well and I appreciated the candor on such a deep topic. The humor lightened the tone up quite a bit.

I think you’ll enjoy this book if you like topics related to women and mental health through the lense of marriage, family dynamics and motherhood.

Faith Jones chronicles shocking parts of her adolescence that include sexual abuse and physical abuse under the guise of religious devotion to God. At the very end, Faith talks about how she comes to terms with how she was living through books and education and decided to leave when she was 23 years old.

This is not necessarily a deep dive into how such masses of people can fall for such debauchery, rather, it is about the individual experience of Faith told in her voice by reflection of what she endured and saw around her through her own eyes within her own family. She writes about how her brothers were treated and groomed for sex. She spoke of how her mother would engage in “flirty fishing” which is basically meeting men at random bars and having sex with them as a way to “win them over” for Christ. She spoke about how strict her family was growing up on the farm in a remote part of china and how horrific punishments could be if they disobeyed. As she grows up she starts to explore how her upbringing affected her choices as an adult and how she ultimately sought freedom through education.

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I think this book is an engaging story and good insight to this cult which had, at one point, 10,000 members across the world. It is a disturbing and frankly uncomfortable read at times. I do wish there was a little more depth to this novel that gave us the broader context to this cult and even other similar cults.

At some points the book felt never ending as it was just her recollecting horrific parts of her past and I think it could have been broken up with more perspective. It’s a compelling story, don’t get me wrong, but I think the combining her personal narrative with larger social and historical framework would greater emphasize the importance of her story and provide a richer understanding of what she went through. To her credit, she does use the prologue to chronicle the start of the cult and why the 70s was prime time for something like this, but I would have preferred it to be weaved into her story more.

There has to be some societal implications here that allow men to yield so much abusive and oppressive power basically unchecked. How can a group that promoted girls to start having sex as young as 12 with men twice their age grow to such large numbers? What if the author used her experience to explore that more?

Overall definitely recommend but please check trigger and content warnings before you begin.

Meet Evelyn, a stately woman with grand potential who eventually becomes a distinguished professor and author. Underneath her grand exterior is the pain of losing her Daughter Charlotte who ran away while pregnant with her daughter Corinna.

We follow Charlotte and Corinna’s journey, a stark contrast in some ways to Evelyn’s journey, but also eerily the same. As the chapters unfold we began to see how Charlotte’s past of abuse is shaping her life and her decisions with her daughter, Corinna.

Then Corinna has a daughter she named Camille and the healing journey of these women seems to take a pivot when Charlotte becomes a grandmother. As Corinna starts to get more curious about who she is, she uncovers some dark secrets that opens up the door for them to connect and reconnect with Evelyn.

As we spend time with each of these women and hear from their POV, we learn about their pain. And although it appears each generation seems to get better and their wellbeing improves, we see that without confronting themselves and understanding where they came from, their growth was sometimes only surface level and superficial. The underlying issues of their broken relationships that stem from a broken family continued to creep up and manifest in different ways in their lives. As they continue to grow, they slowly realize when you don’t talk about things it only gives it more power and they each have to find their own path to heal. It’s not until they started to uncover who they are by uncovering their pasts and confronting themselves, we see healing and transformation take place in all these women as they begin to open up. The ghosts of their past and present remind them of their unresolved grief, guilt, and regrets until they are forced to confront themselves. With each generation there seems to be a progressive “awakening” which I really connected to.

We see the women really struggle with forgiveness and confronting their trauma. We seen them make mistakes. We see their minds start to change and heal. I thought each character exhibited immense growth which made this a beautiful story.

This is very much a character driven novel that explores the complexities of the mother/daughter relationship and how we are truly a product of our environment. I like that though it explored their relationship with men, it isn’t a huge focal point so it’s not male-centered. It’s truly about who they are and what they went through as women. The chapters are long and I found myself not connecting to the time it was set in. Sometimes this story felt like it was set way further back in time than it is, but I think that’s a factor of the majority of this book being set in backwoods Tennessee.

Getting to know these women and their pasts was truly a healing experience for me as a daughter who now has daughters. After reading this I made a promise to myself that I would always be open and honest with my girls about my past and the past of their grandmothers. I will not carry any shame about my past or my ancestors past into the next generation.

What this book showed me is how we unintentionally can cause more pain in the lives of our descendants by not confronting our ghosts. And even our best efforts to raise our sons and daughters will be futile without reconciling with your past. And your past includes your mother’s past, her mother’s past. I wish I knew more about my grandmothers who have now passed. But I will be able to use what I know.

Shari Franke is one of 6 children of Kevin and Ruby Franke, a LDS family who rose to fame in 2015 on YouTube, garnering over a million followers on YouTube. What many who watched their saw was a “wholesome” religious family but behind the scenes there was abuse, neglect and negative influence from a so called therapist, named Jodi that exacerbated the issues the family was facing, specifically from their mother, Ruby.

The Toxic mother daughter relationship is a central theme to this book. She made it very clear how constantly being on camera affected her mental health. I found her commentary about the love she desired and missed from her mother really disheartening. The way she explains their encounters from the time she was young up until she was a young adult was important to the authenticity of her story, and she did well outlining the implications of her relationship.

There is also really good dialogue and self reflection about multiple events in her life from the time Jodi walked in their life to when her parents decided to excommunicate her from the family. This made the book immersive and flow well. Shari was able to recall conversations with Jodi in their therapy sessions that ultimately negatively effected her friendships and decision making. Jodi effectively demolished Shari’s confidence on purpose in hopes of creating a docile, submissive home that can easily be controlled. Jodi even sought to bring Kevin under submission, and Shari shares a lot about their relationship as well. It’s amazing Shari was able to break free.

But freedom came at a cost. Shari had to confront a lot of her past to heal, and during this journey she details the abuse she experienced from a much older, married man who was also apart of the LDS church. Shari did a good job of connecting the abuse she experienced from her mother to this abuse she experienced in adulthood. She divulged a lot of personal details about this time in her life and it makes the memoir that much more powerful.

Shari (rightfully) didn’t share any information about her younger siblings to give them autonomy over their own stories and use their own voices if they choose to. This didn’t take away from the authenticity of Shari’s story as this was her experience. She was able to share perspectives from multiple other voices like her aunts, grandparents, and friends which gave a full picture of what was going on without mentioning her siblings. I thought this was really well done.

Where I thought she fell slightly short on is connecting the influence of the LDS church on what occurred in their home. It seems like she is still a member of the church but a lot of the beliefs her mother held to justify abuse is not (in my opinion) just because she’s a narcissist, but also because of the church and I wish she explored that a bit more.

Overall I applaud Shari for exposing the truth and telling her story as I believe this can be a true testament to the dangers of religious extremism for families and communities.

If you liked I’m Glad my Mom Died (Jeanette McCurdy) and Counting the Cost (Jill Duggard) I think you’ll really like this as well. There’s also a documentary on Hulu called “Devil in my Home.” (but I keep falling asleep trying to watch it)

I could not get that out of my mind while reading this memoir. Patric Gagne, gives us a glimpse of her innermost self and the behavior as a (mostly) self-diagnosed sociopath from the time she was a little girl into her adulthood. As a child, she recounts the odd behavior of her inability to show or feel remorse, her urges to steal and how she always wanted to be alone. Her mother, who she speaks fondly of, often acts as her moral compass but eventually grows weary of her antics to the point their relationship becomes a bit more tense, which is a huge turning point in her story.

She continues to tell us her story through young adulthood, recounting how she continues to interrogate her condition (noting that sociopathy isn’t in the dictionary) and becomes even more interested in sociopathy in college when she takes a psychology course at UCLA. It’s there she starts to understand how little is actually known about sociopathy. So she starts to form her own conclusions and hypothesis. She even comes up with her own behavioral treatment plan which seems to work for her for a while. After several therapy sessions, she is inspired to pursue her PHD despite resistance from people close to her. As an adult, she continues to find ways to quench her apathy, a lot of which has to do with a reconnection to a boy she met years before. She ends up dating and living with him in Los Angeles, and eventually marrying and having kids with him. Much of her exploration of her condition is filtered through her relationship with him. She does not really share much about her journey to get a PHD.

This was a pretty good memoir, as Patric does a decent job of succinctly and simply explaining who she is and her sociopathic tendencies. The memoir has good depth to it (in terms of the scenes she shares) because she brings in other important characters and dialogue to add more dimension. She’s really good at making the points in her story connect with each other. It is an easy to read memoir that flows nicely. There are some jaw dropping moments (stalking, stealing cars, breaking into houses and choking cats) and also some juicy relationship scenes and inside tidbits working in the entertainment industry that make it a sure page turner. It is very well written. I was honestly hooked! It only took me a few days to get through the entire audiobook.

Here’s where things get tricky for me.

On the other hand, sometimes I think it’s too simple. And Repetitive. I found myself wondering how many times she is going to say “I’m a sociopath.” I also find it very strange that a PHD writes a memoir and doesn’t talk about her research at all (assuming it even exist). Especially since she claims she wants to help sociopaths. It seems to me that whatever she believes about sociopathy is true and it must be true because she’s a… sociopath. She doesn’t substantiate much of her claims outside of conversations with her therapists and professors. In other mental health memoirs I’ve read like “What My Bones Know,” the author provides robust information about C-PTSD in a very simplistic and accessible way. Sociopath is just simple, and it’s not robust. It’s clear to me that Patric is correct in that sociopath is largely understudied, but she doesn’t talk about this in a way that brings reflection to herself or shed light to what she doesn’t know about the condition she identifies so strongly with.

Patric writes her story as if she is the only sociopath in the world or the only sociopath that has gone down the path of self discovery like she has. Mental health is extremely complex and doctors often disagree on diagnosis.  It also often takes people a long time to get assessed and diagnksed, as a diagnosis can vary over time. Through a conversation with her professor, she does bring up the flaw in diagnosing a sociopath using the psychopathic assessment, but again there’s not much reflection about that here.

She also doesn’t explore what environmental, neurological, or traumatic events that may at have caused her mental health issues. Did she just wake up a sociopath? Was she born that way? It’s also interesting to me that sociopath is not endorsed by the American Psychiatrist Association and most mental health professionals don’t use that term. So I really want to know, why is Patric so adamant about using that term to identify her?

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Another big elephant in the room: the immense amount of privilege she has. I thought deeply on if I should hold her to the fact that there’s very little reflection on how her privilege as a wealthy, white, skinny woman afforded her the opportunities she has to explore  her mental health in the way she was able to. After all, it’s not her fault she has privilege. If the awareness of it isn’t apart of her story, I wouldn’t want her to force it. At the same time, a memoir is as good of an opportunity as any to really explore this. She does offer some declarations of “what about sociopaths that aren’t like me” in therapy but it’s in a very self important way. And she does include a statement in her introduction that she recognizes her privilege. It would have been nice to see demonstration of that.

I would have also really liked to see how she applied her knowledge and experience to her practice. She was a practicing therapist but offered no insight to others who may also be a sociopath. No learnings, reflection from the other side of the coin. That was really disappointing and could have added a lot to this story.

So while I think the book itself is good, the content itself still begs a lot of questions for me. I think she’s potentially getting away with a lot because this is a memoir so it’s her story, but I still feel like it’s lacking.

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Reading a poetry collection alongside a book can be such an enriching experience, and it’s my favorite way to indulge in a poetry collection.

Sometimes I finish a book I love and find a poetry collection with the same feel or theme to deepen my enjoyment of the material. Other times I happen to read through a poetry collection that reminds me of a book I have already read. Either way, when I find a connection, it’s always a powerful way for me to engage in the words and rhythm of the text. While poetry collections can stand on their own, the right book pairing is like the perfect dessert to satisfy a sweet tooth after a savory meal.

How to pair books with poetry collections :

• Look for books and poetry collections with similar themes, settings and ideas

• You can’t go wrong with a love poem collection and a romance novel

• Look for books written by poets-

• Search for poems mentioned by people you know-

Check out some of my recent favs below

Romance Novels and Love Poems

I bought Love Poems by Nikki Giovanni earlier this year as an ebook deal (Shout out to !) I love Nikki Giovanni’s collection: Black Feeling, Black Talk / Black Judgement published in 1970, so I was excited to dive in. When I did, I was immediately taken back to A Love Song for Ricki Wilde. Something about the tone of Nikki’s writing that reminded me of the whirlwind romance of Ricki and Ezra. Remembering how they couldn’t get enough of each other; these poems have that same feel: a love that’s compulsive. The feeling of Jazz, romance, silliness and freedom are so Prominet in both of these works. I actually think this poetry collection would pair well with a lot of black romance novels. So take your pick!

Books by Poets

Halfway through How to Say Babylon, I knew I needed to buy her poetry collection, Cannibal. And I did! A large portion of the book focuses on how she became the poet she is today, so not only did I want to see the result of her years of hard work, I was mesmerized by her poetic writing and needed more. The Poetry collection did not disappoint. I LOVE it. If you read How to Say Babylon, you will love it. If you haven’t read it yet, definitely consider reading it alongside Cannibal. Some of the beautiful writing about Jamaica, even the hard parts of her upbringing, come to life even more in her collection. They share similar themes and you see so much commonality in her prose between the two.

Cross Reference of Prominent Figures in Poetry

Jada Pinkett Smith talks about Tupac in a refreshing and passionate way in her Memoir, Worthy. She describes him in a way that does not strip him of his humanity, nor does it put him on a pedestal. You can tell she really knew him. The intimate portrait of their relationship made me reach for his poetry collection, The Rose from Concrete which I’ve owned for quite awhile. While I have glanced at a few of his writings, it was Jada’s Memoir that really inspired me to take a deeper look. What better way to continue the deep exploration of someone than to read their own personal expressions through poetry. Just as Jada speaks so fluently of who Tupac really was and the significance of their relationship, Tupac has an entire poem about her affectionally called “Jada.” It was very special to read their expressions of each other through these two very personal lenses. It also speaks to how dynamic poetry is, because while Jada expressed so much over several chapters, Tupac was able to express the same type of passion for Jada in just a stanza.

Share with me how you engage in poetry and any pairings you would recommend. :)

For some more great insights and content about reading and engaging in poetry, I have really enjoyed two of latest posts:

• Novels by poets that feature lush language and engaging plots

• Three reasons to read poetry

Last week I found out I got a promotion to Sr. Manager at my job! A long time coming, but I’m super proud of myself and grateful. To still be a high performer as a new mom has been hard, but to see it pay off is unexplainable. Naturally I decided to reward myself with new books!

Here’s what I got:

Reading Genesis by Marilynne Robinson is a literary exploration of the book of Genesis. Growing up in church, I always enjoyed the actual studying of the Bible. As a reader, I’m really interested at the approach Marilynne takes in her analysis and commentary of the book of Genesis. I read a few paragraphs and knew I had to get it.

Black Liturgies by Cole Arthur Riley is a collection of poems, prayers and meditations that focus on connecting spirituality through the lens of the black experience. Books that center the black experience especially as it relates to social justice and faith are very personal to me. I am still in the process of connecting my identity as a black woman with my faith.

James by Percival Everett is a reimagining of Huckleberry Finn from the perspective of Jim. When this was first announced sometime last year, I remember saying “wow that’s going to be fire!” All of the reviews I have seen so far indicate I was right. I’m excited to find out for myself.

There’s Always This year by Hanif Abdurraqib is a collection of essays that explore themes of identity, sports and growing up Black. I love his last book- A Little Devil in America, so I have very high expectations of this one.

Piglet by Lottie Hazel is about a woman who has everything going for her. She has great friends, a great fiance, but before the wedding she learns something that totally wrecks her world and she copes by eating a lot! The cover of this book really intrigued me, but I’m nervous how I’ll like it I enjoy literary fiction if it’s not TOO literary. I like character driven books that aren’t boring so hopefully this one fits!

The Thing About Home by Rhonda McKnight is about a young woman whose marriage falls apart so she goes back home and rediscovers her roots by reading through her grandmother’s old journals I’ve heard from so many people how cozy and warm this story is and I think I need more books that make feel those feelings.

The Partner Plot and The Neighbor Favor by Kristina Forest are contemporary romance books that I’ve been seeing all over Bookstagram and I always need a few lighthearted romance books on my TBR. The Partner Plot is a second chance and marriage of convenience trope, and The Neighbor Favor is a close proximity romance.

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Something about this haul of books made me realize two things:

1. I need to up my reading pace/time. These last few months I usually read 2-4 hours a week. That’s just not going to cut it. If I’m going to continue to buy books, I need to read more, otherwise they will just sit on my shelf indefinitely, and I really don’t want that. Plus, I really enjoy reading and I have so many good books I’m craving to read. I should absolutely spend more time doing what I enjoy.

2. I need to reorganize my shelves and book cart. Something about pulling out all the books you own, looking at what you have, and then reorganizing them that brings you back to why you wanted to read some of the books you bought months and years ago. Going through my books and asking myself what do I REALLY want to read and inhaling the rest helps me to be more thoughtful about my choices in the future.

This week my goal is to be more intentional about the time I spend reading to hopefully get through more books that I want to read. And hopefully I make some progress on organizing my shelves!

This week I started reading Unlikable Female Characters: The Women Pop Culture Wants you to Hate after I read an op-ed about likability and Amanda Seales that was getting a lot of flak online. It made me think about how real women are often victim to harmful tropes we see in movies and books. I finished up How to Say Babylon and posted a review on my Instagram. I also continued to read Weird Black Girls which comes out April 16.

Happy Reading!

Last Week’s reading stats

This week I really needed a day off. I’m in senior management at my job, and we have been going through some exciting but challenging changes. It’s been busy. On top of being mom and a wife— I’m a little overwhelmed. Naturally I started my day off at a bookish coffee shop in the Soulard neighborhood of St. Louis: Protagonist Cafe.

This was the first time in awhile I could just sit and read for an hour straight with no interruptions. It felt really good, so I told myself I would do this more often.

I chose to read my ARC copy of Weird Black Girls by Elwin Cotman, a collection of short stories that explores the human experience through elements magical realism and fantasy. I have to say: the writing is pretty good! I’m excited to talk more about these stories when I finish, so stay tuned.

Then after getting my nails done and treating myself to sushi rolls, I headed to Left Bank Books in the Central West End Neighborhood of St. Louis and browsed their used and new book section. I spent about $80 on 4 books— 2 used and 2 new. There were some interesting finds in the used section, including a $6 hardback, signed copy of Emily Henry’s Happy Place (No, I didn’t purchase it).

I ended my day at Jeni’s Ice Cream and sat at the park in silence listening to nature, admiring the birds sing. I am so happy Spring is finally here and I can spend more time outside. It’s so important for my mental health.

I also finally finished How to Say Babylon, which I really enjoyed but I still cannot quite put words into a written review. I’m sure I will find the words for it soon. It is, however, the subject my previous post: What Safiya Sinclair and Jill Duggar Have in Common: Pants.

This week’s reading stats

-Brittany

Some of my favorite types of memoirs are from women who have navigated these deeply ferocious familial relationships that are often violent and frankly sometimes hard to read about. But journeying through the experiences of these women and reading how they overcame their upbringing and found freedom, makes these books worth the pursuit.

As I was recently devouring “How to Say Babylon” by Safiya Sinclair I was struck by a key, defining moment she beautifully outlined in her book- her insistence to start wearing pants instead of skirts.

Safiya’s memoir is a beautifully written coming of age tale of growing up under a strict Rastafarian household. Towards the middle of the book, she talks about a minor, but crucial turning point: wanting to be like the other kids on a school trip to Cuba.

Though it now seems trivial to the point of incredulity, in my household, pants were not just another item of clothing for the women in my family. A woman wearing pants was a sign of ruin to a Rastaman, a lewd gesture in the face of His Majesty. "Any dawta wearing pants is nothing but a Jezebel," my father would tell me, preaching from the gospel of the Mansion of Djani. So I made this my crusade. Every weekend I would beg for pants instead of skirts, and one Saturday, after swatting me down for years, my mother finally smiled and said, "Sweet P and I have a plan." Page 177

I was instantly reminded of another memoir I read in September 2023– Counting the Cost By Jill Duggar. If you’re thinking that name sounds familiar, you may recognize the “Duggar” name from the popular TV show 19 kids and Counting and the subsequent spin-off shows.

Jill Duggar’s memoir is about her strict Christin upbringing, specifically the IBLP ministry, and growing up on a reality TV show. She talks about how she slowly began to find her voice. Much of her journey to self discovery and finding freedom from her parents and upbringing was facilitated by her husband, Derick.

One day she casually asked Derick if he thought women wearing pants was a sin, citing Deuteronomy 22:6, to which he basically responded, that during the time that verse was written, pants didn’t even exist. So how it could it be talking about pants?

It wasn’t fair, but somewhere deep inside of me there was a part that wanted Derick to tell me that pants were wrong, just like Pops always had. Growing up, having the world divided into thou shalls and thou shalt nots by Pops or IBLP ideology made life appear easier. I had grown up believing that if I just followed the rules, I would be okay. - page 192

What These Memoirs Teach Us

Both of these women grew up under the strict control of their fathers who were following religious guidelines that ultimately hurt them in some way. It doesn’t matter if it’s Christianity or Rastafarianism, women just like Safiya and Jill are living under this type of patriarchal control today. Both books— How to Say Babylon and Counting the Cost— do a great job of showing how their fathers manipulated them and her other siblings in the name of God and religion. Both are written in their distinct voice, with vastly different styles but so much in common. These memoirs teach us the power in finding your voice, and how outside influence can hinder us from becoming into the full brilliance of who we are.

I really enjoyed both of these books for different reasons and I definitely recommend them.

Excellent Fiction Requires Excellent Research

I don’t know if people normally associate research with romance writing, but it’s an important part of both Tia Williams and Kennedy Ryan’s writing process.

In This Could Be Us, the love interest (Judah Cross) has two autistic sons, and the book explores what it’s like to coparent them. Kennedy herself is the mother of a young adult autistic son and has been actively involved in the autism community for more than two decades. But she didn’t want just her insular experience to be the only experience she gleaned from to write the book. I love that Kennedy didn’t assume just because she has an autistic son, she could write the experience of autistic people with 100% authenticity, recognizing her experience doesn’t represent the experience of everyone in the autistic community. She still sought autistic editors and sensitivity readers to read her work for feedback. Her commitment to this practice shows up in her writing. Her characters are never one dimensional. They are believable, well rounded characters with complexity. I genuinely appreciate how careful she is in making sure she doesn’t harm marginalized communities. The main character, Soledad, has Puerto Rican background and since Kennedy is not Puerto Rican, she interviewed several women with Puerto Rican heritage to bring greater authenticity and representation to her story. I think she nailed it!

The scenes in Tia Williams’ book, a Love Song for Ricki Wilde are so lush with beautiful descriptions of flower arrangements against the backdrop of Harlem. But she’s not a botanist or a florist. Her research included speaking to multiple black florists in New York to be able to paint the setting as beautiful as she did. The novel also includes scenes of Harlem during the renaissance era which she admits she is already an avid consumer of Harlem renaissance history, which inspired the book. She did call for help with the some of the jazz scenes by interviewing some well known jazz musicians.

Disparities for black romance writers.

I really appreciated Kennedy’s candid conversation on how hard it is for black women in the romance space. During the St. Louis book tour stop she mentioned there were many international markets that said no to selling the Skyland series because they simply don’t believe books with black characters could sell in their market (she did not name the country). Kennedy didn’t shy away from mentioning she was tired of the fight she endured everyday as a black romance writer in publishing.

You’re probably familiar, but Romance is the highest earning genre in publishing— still to this day. In fact, Romance accounted for over 33 percent of books sold in mass-market paperback format in 2022, according to research data and analytics group WordsRated.

And while it seems like  romance novels are getting more diverse than they have been in years past, The State of Racial Diversity in Romance Publishing Report tells us we still have some work to do.

The report showed that only 12% of the romance books published in 2020 were by authors of color, only a small improvement from the previous year. Unfortunately in 2023, only 10% of romance books published were by authors of colors. That’s right— we’re going backwards.

It’s easy to see why Kennedy Ryan is tired. And it makes her accomplishments even more impressive. She worked so hard to get to this point and she absolutely deserves the recognition she has received.

Black Women Read Books Too

I really soaked this experience in. As I looked across the sold-out audience, I smiled with pride at all the brown skin, the natural hair; our excitement was so profoundly evident. My friend and I gushed over how we were looking forward to this for weeks since we found out about the event. A night off from putting our babies to bed. It was such a good night for us.

This was also such a special day for Kennedy Ryan because she learned  she made the New York Times Best Seller list. During the event, she shared the last time a black romance author made the NYT Bestseller list was 3 years ago— and it was Seven Says in June by Tia Williams. Not only that, this book tour stop was sold out, with the majority of the audience being black women. It’s plain to see that black women, probably one of the main consumers of this book, read books too. So why so much disparity in publishing in traditional publishing?

I’ll let you ponder on that.

I really loved reading both of these books and being able to attend this author event was the icing on the cake to my reading experience. I am really looking forwards to what they do next.