As I continue to grow, I want to ensure that anyone I work with is paid a living wage while we work on creating new and exciting pieces for yall.

For my paid subscribers who want to support my Designer Diaries, each week they’ll be getting a bonus piece of content. Think behind the scenes, more casual, like we’re on facetime.

This is a space for subscribers, by me, so if you have any suggestions or requests on future paid content just for you, lemme know!

Let me know in the community chat

Mentions:

My friend’s podcast! Moment’s with Medina 💕

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This past week I found myself being witness to a celebration of life with my birthday, the almost loss of life with a family member, and the realization that above all else — living authentically is what I want.

I barely started celebrating my 27th birthday when my family got an unexpected call. Someone almost passed. And this someone I, along with many others, have complex feelings over.

We’re happy that this person is still around and doing better, but we’re still met with what we know they did in their lives. How their actions impacted others, for the better and worse, and how they impacted us.

Knowing someone as a familial name, but also knowing this person was a huge part in why you were raised with fear of “real life” or “life never being fair” is complicated to say the least. And having this loom over my 27th birthday, right before the Pisces full moon, right as I was already starting to feel uneasy about what I’m doing as I double down further into authentic expression.. all this to say this week has been a lot.

And a great reminder that not only the company you keep is important, but the environment you build within is everything. Both your outer and inner worlds. These lessons hit harder when you’re trying to create something new at this age, with no roadmap but your own.

The News

Like I said, I barely was able to celebrate my birthday before getting this news that someone was suddenly ill. But the news came with the memories. Not just my own, but the people I loved. Remembering how they were, why they acted the way they did, the hatred they felt for this person but the calling of duty —because we’re family — to still show up for them. I remember when I got the call, I was alone and in shock, so I called my brother. We spoke for a few minutes, and we both felt better but still unsure of how to feel. But a few minutes after hanging up, I began to cry for my family members who cared deeply for this person, as we cared most for them.

The next day, I felt better, knowing that people had shown up and that things were looking up, so I continued about my day. I painted, I worked out. Then came Monday.

I worked, I had a great chat with a blooming friendship and future Wealthy Artist Guest, painted, read, worked out. And at the end of my workout I saw I had missed a call from my dad.

“Hey just calling becuase you didn’t call “so and so” and I have them right here, say hi”

I thought my dad was calling about dinner, since it would’ve been right on time, but instead it felt like a direct call-out. Like I wasn’t doing enough because I wasn’t there. Because I didn’t call.

It hit directly onto my wounds of feeling guilt and shame, not only protecting my boundaries, but moving forward away from things that drain me. That I don’t have the energy for. That I don’t feel obligated to show up for. And in this case especially, I was still confused about how I felt and didn’t know what to say to this individual, so I thought it best not to say anything too quickly and leave it be till I had the words. Till I had time to process how I felt.

The thing about being back home in the environment you grew up in, while you’re building something nobody around you has ever built, is that ‘it’s hard sometimes’ is an understatement. These moments—when I feel alone, when I call my brother who’s halfway across the country, when I’m conflicted about how to act—are the real tests of this chapter. They remind me that building a business in your 20s isn’t just about strategy; it’s about growing through every personal challenge that pops up along the way.

A pattern I’ve picked up on in between all of this is that when something beautiful happens that helps expand my nervous system to feel safe receiving at a greater capacity, then something comes in that makes me feel like I have to shrink. That I shouldn’t celebrate. Literally, my brother asked the rhetorical question on our call: why is it that when things start going good, something bad has to happen? As you can see, it’s a familial belief we’re all processing to rewrite in our own ways.

Back to the pattern, whether it be celebrating my birthday, to getting caught in a storm on the way home, but then realizing I manifested 8 things in one day to then getting that call.

Or, having a beautiful chat Monday afternoon about the future and our collab, having the rest of a great day, to then getting that call after completing my last 75 hard item for the day. That call felt like it completely wiped away all the joy and celebration that had just happened.

Even now things are blooming

Even in the chaos, there’s definite proof that the seeds I’ve spent years planting, personally and in my business, are growing.

Even now, as I write this diary entry for yall, I received a text from someone I met at an event the other day. Tbh, I felt like shit right before I went. I realized I’d be traveling in and out of DC during rush hour, so driving was a huuugge no-no. Even though I was about to hit 2 weeks of my modified 75 hard challenge, I still wasn’t fitting into the tops I wanted to wear. I felt like a goddamn sausage at one point trying on clothes. I also didn’t want to juggle switching back and forth between wearing heels and my On Clouds just to look “presentable”.

The event was for women founders in the DC area, hosted by a fellow founder (Nhuana’s founder) and content creator. It was all about gathering local women founders who want to connect with peers who match the same drive and have the same excitement for their brands.

And I’m so happy I went.

Even though I wasn’t feeling comfortable and ended up with a headache as everything was coming to an end, I met some pretty cool people. One of whom just texted me to say she wants to get to know me better, since we didn’t have much time to chat, and would love to share my rates and resources with the businesses she partners with.

I left that event on Wednesday feeling semi-accomplished but kinda left out, as it didn’t seem many people were excited to chat about visual communication, brand strategy, or the Wealthy Artist podcast after I introduced myself and what I do, but receiving a few texts, with this one being the most recent from the women I met made it all feel worth it.

I also want to share one more thing as I wrap up today’s post. I found some notes I took with the help of AI in December 2025 this morning. At the time, I had just come back from New York and Austin for the TBM book tour and a girls trip weekend; I was getting back into learning more for my business again, and I was reminiscing on how far I’ve come and how much my journey impacted others globally (even to this day I still get dms and emails from people 💕).

I had asked ChatGPT at the time to take the notes I had from the Earnable course I was in, to take what it already knew about me and where I want to go, and to take a peak at the guest episode page for the TBM Expanded podcast I was on (each episode gets it’s own designated page and I loved how mine showed not only my story but showed exactly how I wanted to be perecived without me even knownig what it was gonna say.)

What I got back from AI was amazing, and I wanted to share it with you here.

My story is all about

The people who tune in with me (Instagram, Substack, YouTube, etc) are those who crave:

• freedom from overwhelm

• business that feels soulful

• identity clarity

• self-worth and confidence

• alignment in career

• someone who understands grief, rebirth, transformation

• someone who sees the internal blocks as much as the external strategy

• ease, softness, and nervous-system safe entrepreneurship

• someone who can hold their big dreams but speak to the scared parts

My story, alchemy, turning pain into sparkle, turning tough things into fun things is how I show up. It’s my secret sauce. The optimism of my Sagittarian moon with the Leo sun and the strategy of my Capricorn ascendant.

Girl, it’s even in my astro chart (my Leo stellium in the 8th house having ass, lol). But I’m so glad it came through from sharing my story with TBM, from finding the heart of my business’s why with Earnable, from finding it on my own first but having chat regurgitate it back to me because I needed to see it again in a new light.

Overall, finding yourself can feel hard in any environment, but what matters is that you keep showing up, whatever that means for you. The same goes for building a business in your 20s: do your best to track your habits, your goals, your fails, and your celebrations little or big, especially your birthday 🎂

And no matter how hard life can feel, keep going babes.

Because one day you’ll find your diary or your field notes and remember where you were and actually see how far you’ve come.

Share this with a friend ♡

*Btw, that cute cone cake in the intro is from this post by Erin McDowell, one of my favorite bakers. I wish I had one of these for my birthday!

Happy Baking Newsletter

Tiered Cake Cones

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18 days ago · 61 likes · 6 comments · Erin Jeanne McDowell

The Designer Diaries 💌 By Alyah

Behind the scenes on my journey starting a creative business in my 20's, rewriting limiting beliefs around money and work, what's been inspiring me, and my remote travel diary.

Timestamps ★
00:00 Intro
2:48 Tip 1
5:13 Tip 2
8:17 Tip 3
9:20 Tip 4
11:12 Tip 5
14:12 Tip 6
17:00 Bonus (what i'm doing)


All inquiries ➡️ contact@byalyah.com

Once again, just like my last post, I don’t really know how to start this one, but let’s try it again.

Why did I start painting this? What’s the story? The good thing is, I can mostly remember why I started this piece, but I don’t remember when it happened.

Then

Sometime between December 2024 and May 2025, I was in an in-between space of grief. Still missing the days of my last apartment, the subtle comfort of a biweekly corporate check, spending days lounging around with my dog.

A lot had changed; in that moment in time, I was barely getting used to living with my parents again, I had just started my business, and I was in the middle of my $10k investment into all types of courses and programs (that's another story for another day).

Between the go-go-go of being a founder and the quiet stillness of grief, one of the things I missed the most was painting. And not just painting anything, but my love for painting the sky in my own way. My last apartment was the first time I had truly seen the sky as an entire side of my place was covered in floor to ceiling windows. I fell in deeper love and admiration with the sky than I ever thought was possible.

Watching the sky at my last place, I finally noticed whimsical wisps, clumps of poof, the subtle color shifts, storms rolling in and out of view — and sometimes how it looked like someone took a glob of paint and nudged it onto a canvas and left it like that. Noticing the imperfections in nature allowed me to feel safe being imperfect in my work.

Living with my parents, I no longer had visual access to that same sky from the same point of view. We get partial light, we have a lot of trees, and the only place I see the sky is, funnily enough, my studio. Where I plop myself down at my desk or at my easel that’s right next to the only window that I can admire at least a bit of the sky from.

So one day between that winter and late spring, I decided I wanted to paint another sky piece, but something happy this time. The last piece I painted in January 2025 was in fact inspired by the sky, but it was heavily abstract and more of a storytelling device of the depths of the liminal space I was in and the dawn I had juust started to feel rising from the grief of 2023-2024.

The Process

I found a 12 by 12 inch canvas, gently stretched it, and started with a single shade for the background of Lefranc Bourgeois Flashe in Blue Ash (one of my favorites from LeFranc, not sponsored). And the great thing about these flash paints is how fast they dry and the matte texture they leave behind. So while the painting was drying, I gathered some heavy body white paint, a heavy body ecru, a dusty peach shade from the Winsor & Newton Galleria acrylics, Golden’s Fluid Gold Interference, and a touch of Blue Ash on my glass palette.

I grabbed a small semi-sturdy yet fluffy brush, and immediately took a touch of the peach and blue to mix a midtone desaturated gray/violet and put it to the canvas to start shaping where the cloud would go.

Smack dab in the middle of the canvas. I wanted my fluffy boy to shine. As I ran out of the grayish violet mixture that would act as not only an initial sketch but some subtle shadow in the billowing poofs, I let the paint set for a few minutes while I thought about how I wanted to approach this next part.

So remember that part about imperfections and how they sky tiaght me that realsim isnt actully real as its a consctruct of what we think is ideal, come on Transcedentalist paiters, remeber that? Ya, so this is when I started to get in my head.

I thought, wait, why not try and make this little guy look realistic? What's the harm?

I’ve never really taken a shot at painting realistic clouds in depth. And by in dpeth I mean panting all the midtones, 8 layer prcoess, goin back o refill the parts of my mixed pallete becuase I used up my paitin and somehow finding my exact matches to keep painting.

I’ve never done that; it intimidated me, but I really thought, why not try it this time? Then time went by; I was sitting in a freeze state, afraid to do anything because I didn’t want to mess up. I had gotten so excited by the idea of attempting realism that I let that excitement turn into fear of failure, and then all the joy was zapped out of me.

At this point I may have scrolled through Pinterest or some of my old photos from my last place, but I wasn’t sure how to approach my next steps. I knew I had to do something because I wanted to finish this painting in one sitting.

So eventually I said fuck it.

I grabbed a tiny glob of the heavy duty white paint, placed it on the canvas, and as the brush left the canvas I made a half circle with the brush stroke. And I really liked it. So I did it again, in another spot this time with more intention as to where this puffy whisp would be on the edge of the cloud. Then again and again.

Eventually I started adding the ecru in tiny bits, then gently blending the colors and textures to create a blur. I did this by being sure to clean my brush, using a cloth to remove excess paint water, then I barely touched the canvas as I swayed the brush back and forth. This is how I created my puffy and wispy cloud.

I’m also remembering I think I was further inspired ot take this direction for starting heavy, blending sometimes, and then layering the heavy curls again after being reminded of the animated clouds in Disney’s Hercules and the intro sequence to Mulan. I always loved those clouds, and remembering them during this painting process gave me more support and validation to keep going. Then it was time to add tiny touches of gold, but I decided not to. I had realized that I like how this piece looked without the gold, and I didn’t want the paints to blend. If I were to use gold on this piece, I’d want some more control, so if anything, I’d wait to try it out. So I finished this piece with a couple more globs to make curls and wisps, and left it at that.

Now

Today, I see this piece as mostly done. I haven’t varnished it. But even a varnish hasn't stopped me from adding more paint and then revarnishing a piece.

I can still see myself using a fine script brush, maybe a 00 or 0 brush, to create small wisps of gold. If I were to do this, I’d go in to create the line, then a series of consecutive lines that grow thinner the farther away they are from the first. I may even gently blend out the thinner lines with my finger to add a slight golden haze to that area of the canvas. Either way, I had fun with this piece, and this is my favorite golden boy. He taught me a lot about myself in a very short instance of time, and I’m grateful for my lil puff.

If you’re interested in this piece, the original is ready to find its new home with a collector. For prints, please fill out the form on the page below.
https://www.byalyah.com/gallery


Author’s Note
The Gallery is an ongoing series where I share the stories behind my original artworks, moments of stillness, healing, and creative rebirth captured in color.

If this story or piece resonated with you, you can support my work by subscribing to The Designer Diary Newsletter, sharing this post with someone who might need it, or collecting an original or print. Every bit of encouragement helps keep this creative journey flowing. 💛

Stay up to date with my journey 🦋:

🔗Get to know me 🔗Youtube 🔗Tip Jar

For as long as I can remember, I’ve had both words of affirmation and preservation thrust upon me. From “your such a great singer”, “you’re gonna be rich and famous”, to “I’m gonna wash your expensive cars in your manision’s parking lot”.

Yes, I’m serious. That last one was said to me at least 5 times when I was in elementary school. And it was confusing to say the least.

On one end, there I was, this bright bubbly Leo stellium girlie ready to take the world just as I barely was able to step onto a school bus. Then on the other hand, there I was as a girl who was afraid of being left out, forgotten, told to stay quiet, or told I wasn’t enough.

Growing up, I wanted to do and be a lot. I spoke about this before, as I wanted to be an actress, a soccer player, an astronaut, and more. But when I started taking interest in extracurricular activities like my school’s environmental science club or the robotics team, I was told I wasn’t enough to even be considered (my okay grades were the culprit). So as a kid who was raised to take what you’re given without talking back, I left it at that. And so, this conflict of being enough vs. not being enough started.

I was recently stretching, and in the quiet of it all, I started to reflect on why I feel so scared the more I make moves outside of my comfort zone. Then it hit me: I don’t want to go down the wrong path. And to take it further, on why I may think it’s the wrong path, I don’t want to be swayed by what my childhood memory witnessed as safe versus what I truly desire. I’d prefer to act on my authentic desires than the ones I was raised to believe are authentic; rather, they are statements repeated again and again with such conviction that they become core beliefs (whether I actually understood them or not).

Then the statement of being great popped up. I have always felt this grandeur, this billowing fire within that was meant to shine, but now I’m questioning if that was all me or if this was influenced by others pouring affirmation (sometimes questionably, like some things make me think why taf would you say that?) into my young sponge of a mind.

Then I thought about waiting: should I make decisions that may not be truly authentic to my core, or should I just wait? And then I remembered the phrase: There is never going to be the perfect time to do anything; you just have to do it.

Also, why tf do we put so much pressure on ourselves? Then to have that answered with it’s the society we chose to be part of and how we’re raised (hello affirmations and questionable beliefs).

I feel many of us were raised to be afraid of life, to be in scarcity on a hamster wheel afraid of rest or indulgence, instead of enjoying the gift of life, living it.

We are raised to be cautious, to know that the end is near, that if you make the wrong decision it’s your fault, then that’s it. That if we don’t have this or that, are we really worth anything?

Even thinking back to yesterday when I met with a friend for lunch, a walk, and some shopping. We were looking at tops and dresses when I found something that caught my eye: a woven cream-colored halter top. I grabbed it as it was literally the first time something lit me up in that shop, then was disappointed because it had huge cutouts. I told my friend I didn’t like the cutouts or how the fabric sat, but she asked me why not still try it, at least with the idea of a night out or date night?

For a moment I took offense, but just as quickly I let it go, and only now I see I took offense because I don’t typically see myself having nights out. I’m nearly 27, and I never have.

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Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0340YrOX4P2QQMvTFYX54R

Watch the on YouTube:

Notes:

In this first episode of Wealthy Artist, I introduce the heart of the series: a creative space built on honesty, self-expression, and the messy beauty of becoming. I share a bit about the project, why I created it, and how my journey through corporate life, artistry, and self-discovery shaped this vision.

My goal with Wealthy Artist is to create a collaborative piece of visual art and discussion. To not only create for giggles and fun with people who inspire me but to have the work resonate with y’all.

So if you feel called, let me know what you’d like to see from a series like this. Who would you like to have on? What conversations do you want to hear creatives have? Anything that’s been on your mind that you’re passionate about?

So far, topics include:

• the power of graphic design in history: protests, civil rights

• international pov versus the US on art

• lessons from corporate for your younger self

• pivoting to something that lights you up

• being a creator & entrepreneur

• boundaries and self-worth

• creating time and space for your joy

• starting a business

• scarcity behind what it means to be an artist, who gets to be an artist

  and more

That’s all for today. Leaving you with one of my favorite lines: we don’t owe perfection to the internet, but we owe honesty to ourselves.

Follow the journey 🦋

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/byalyah.co/

Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ByAlyah/videos

Subscribe to the Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/ByAlyah

It’s been a bit of a minute since we’ve been on this project but we’re back. If you’re just joining, welcome. I’m glad you’re here!

Quick recap: Stage 1 of this project began in August 2025 and has been slow and intentional since then (as I revisited the project piece by piece, which dug up a lot of memories).

Before we get into anything “strategy” related… I actually want to take a second to go back in time to when this project was created and why.

Preface

When I first started pondering the idea of this project, I was burnt out. Like… deeply burnt out. I just didn’t fully realize it at the time. It was March 2024 and I was unknowingly a couple of months away from being laid off. Even before that moment officially happened, something in me already knew it was time to start moving a lil differently.

I was tired of staying in a space that didn’t feel natural to me.
Tired of measuring my value based on how others, who were no strangers to gaslighting, perceived my work.
I was tired of waiting for approval just to feel like I was doing enough.

So I started shifting on my own, from external validation to actually seeing my own gifts, even when higher-ups didn’t. And if you can’t tell already, I love working independently but I thrive in supportive team environments.

And during this time, I kept thinking about the people who made work feel worthwhile, specifically my Costa Rican colleagues who made up a large part of my immediate team.

There was something about their energy that stayed with me, and ofc us being latinos helped too lol.

No matter what was going on, whether we were celebrating or drafting solutions under pressure, they always carried this sense of ease, warmth, humor, and presence, and encouraged me to do the same, especially when times got tough.

The phrase Pura Vida is often translated as “pure life,” but what I experienced felt deeper than that. It felt like I had renewed faith in life, optimism, joy, and the courage to actually enjoy right now, today, while we still have it. And that’s what I was craving, so the concept for this branding project came from this space.

Not just as a theory in spatial design, but as two questions:
what would it look like if this vibe existed in a physical place? and can I translate that into digital?

A place where there’s balance between luxury and familial experiences.

Think: having brunch at Villa Bokeh, heading out to Lago Atitlán for a mini holiday, then the next destination a few days later is Coatepeque to stay with your extended family, where everything started.

A place where luxury didn’t feel disconnected from the land,
where culture wasn’t just an aesthetic, but truly experienced.
Where people, both guests and locals, are treated with care, dignity, and respect.
As equals.

As a Guatemalan-American, this idea hit something deeper for me too.

Because tourism, especially in Latin America, isn’t just about travel. It’s a first impression for those within the country and on socials. The experience people have in your hometown or home country is one that many don’t want to be a bad one.

It shapes how people see us.
How they interact with our customs and engage with our land. And I’ve seen what happens when that’s done without intention.

So when this project was theorized, it layered in: cultural reverence, community, emotional ease, all while building something for tourists and locals alike that feels regenerative instead of extractive.

I remember when I sat down and wrote all of this out for the first time, just to bring structure to all the ideas I had; I started crying. Because it all finally hit me: how much depth this project has for me and so many people.

But as I can only speak for myself I noticed how this meant to me as a creative, as a loyal friend to those I have in my team, as someone who is forming her own career based on authentic alignment, as a child of an immigrant family who didn’t forget where we come from, and as someone who believes that access to ease and luxury in bipoc communities should be normalized, not shamed.

So today, as I get into it with talk of strategy, ux, values, or anything else…just know that behind every strategy are countless stories waiting to be told, and countless individuals waiting to feel seen in those stories.

How we present narratives and connect to people is our strategy built through empathy, history, and numbers. My greatest expander in this light is Zora Neale Hurston and her anthropological studies turned into art such as Their Eyes Were Watching God.

It’s not just frameworks, notes, or key points in a data visualization. Not something reserved for people who “are in the industry” and speak the language.

Strategy, at its core, is just taking something that matters and learning how to translate it so other people can experience it too. So, now that we had a moment to reflect (and maybe wiped a tear or two lol), let’s really get into it.

I’m going to break this down in a way that actually feels like we’re sharing a tea while having a chat in a cafe. No pressure or rush, just ease into conversation while I show you how I think through things. Because once you understand the why behind something like PVRA, It all starts to feel a lot more natural than you’d expect upon first glance.

And over the course of the next few weeks we’ll keep unfolding what it’s like to build a brand from behind the scenes, while keeping the integrity of the core that came first as we bring this story into a new era. Ok, let’s get into this :)

Part 1: Intro to strategy and strategic thinking in design

I feel like there’s this common idea that strategy scary. That it's all numbers & data, jargon like analytics and funnels, and while yes, those things exist, that’s not where this project started for me.

Back in 2024, it actually started with the feeling.

What would it look like to create a space where luxury, culture, and sustainability don’t compete—but exist in cohesive space? What if we took the idea of this physical environment and made a digital entryway?

Stage 1: Reclaiming My Design Spark

Most of the time, the promises of these words (luxury, sustainability, culture) can feel vague… and even played out, especially in terms of brand systems. I mean, I feel like we can all name at least 3 companies that claim sustainability but completely greenwash.

With luxury, it can seem out of reach or like an overdone aesthetic straight from Pinterest boards (including mine too, no shade). Sustainability has a history of being overused while being misinformed. And cultural awareness has been reduced to a trend several times over, rather than lived experience. (This alone can be its own post!)

And honestly, the misuse of all of these words is soo tired, but I wanted to see what these could actually look like when they’re not only working in unison but actually adhering to what they mean.

Something easeful, rooted, and intentional from start to finish. An experience that not only feels styled, but intentionally architected.

Design transcending 2D spaces with Molteni&C

Around the time I was writing Stage 2 back in October, I attended an event hosted by Molteni Group at their Molteni&C showroom for DC Design Week 2025. Since then, I’ve kept coming back to this design house as a reference for my personal style, but also as a direct example of strategic, intentional design in a physical space. Even combining luxury, sustainability, and culture through their lens.

While revisiting Stage 2 to write on Stage 3, I kept coming back to this reference I couldn’t shake.

A project connected to Molteni&C, the renovation of a historic Milan palazzo reimagined with the strategy of creating this space with the idea of it being the home of an art and design collector. What stayed with me from this palazzo was how the creative director for Molteni&C, Vincent Van Duysen, described the process.

The way the space unfolded across rooms, spanning 7 distinct design themes but still belonging to something larger. How the palazzo held both the neoclassical grandeur of its past while meeting the intimacy of feeling like an actual home. Connecting history to the innovation of the design house today.

And I think that’s the best way I can describe what I wanted this project, this brand, to become at the time of it’s creation.

Not just an idea or a website. But an experience you can move through.

So when I started ideating for this luxurious and culturally aware eco-resort, I thought:

• What would a room feel like when you walk through the entryway?

• What do you notice first?

• Where does your eye rest?

• When do you slow down?

And that right there is strategy. Not in a corporate sense, but in a spatial, purposeful and humane way.

Part 2: Who is this for?

And this is where we pause, because this is the part people usually label with industry lingo, words like:

• target audience

• demographics

• analytics

• user experience (UX)

and if you’re new to design, this is usually where things start to feel extremely overwhelming and you get that sinking feeling in your stomach.

So instead of overcomplicating it, let’s break it down further. At the end of the day, all of those words are just trying to answer one simple question:

Who is this for?

Not in a graph or a spreadsheet, though those are extremely helpful :) but in a way most people can actually get.

So instead of asking who the target audience is, their demographics, and what their psychograph or personna chart say in reference to their home life, career, hobbies, needs, and problems,Think: Who is going to land here and feel like this was made with them in mind?

When we sit with this question, we don’t see “users” in a brand journey, rather real people and their stories.

And of course, take the time to learn what each of these labels means, but don’t feel like you have to use industry lingo to prove yourself when this can be very easily understood. As designers/directors/strategists, our job is to translate complex structures into approachable systems. The easier you’re able to do that for yourself, the easier you’ll do that for others.

Regarding a section of the strategy for this project, I imagined 2 types of people, let’s call them Suzie and Fran. Suzie is someone who has gotten used to moving fast, often, and realized they needed wayy more time to breathe and be in the moment.

They’re creative, still building their sense of style, maybe in their late 20s or 30s, and are working on doing something new on their own. When they can, they travel. Not just to escape, but to reconnect. To feel grounded again.

They’re tired of experiences that look good superficially but lack actual depth and character, that don’t feel like anything.

They also don’t want a packed itinerary.

They want presence with time and space to explore.

And when they encounter this brand of PVRA, I want them to say:
“Wow…this is a place where I can just be… I don’t have to rush. Fianlly.”

With Fran, they’re someone who understands luxury, who’s had it in their daily life for years, but is starting to question why this is as the world continues to change, and so have they.

They’ve turned over a new leaf and realized they could minimize way more, that they don’t need excess. They want something quieter. More intentional. In all aspects of their life.

They care deeply about where they’ve been, where they’re going, how things are built, and who it impacts.

What frustrates them most are experiences that feel transactional. Especially when they promise exclusivity, but deliver mass-produced quality. This brand wouldn’t be about escape for this individual; it’s about alignment.

These two quick examples are the beginning of what we would call personas.

Simply put, personas are just people we’re choosing to understand on a deeper level. Once you understand them, you start to notice lots of things.

What they’re drawn to.
What makes them happy.
What makes them leave.

And any underlying connections that guide them further to this project’s goal. To me, that’s where design and UX begin, not in wireframes but in emapthy and connection.

Part 3: Get your best blazer; we’re doing corporate drag. UX and Google’s 5-Step framework

There’s a framework I think about whenever I’m working on something new, whether it be a post like this or Brand UX audit for a client, and that’s Google’s 5-step UX process:

1. Empathize

2. Define

3. Ideate

4. Prototype and

5. Test

And even though this project isn’t going through that full cycle (not quite yet), the first step of empathy is doing most of the work here. Once you understand how someone feels, you’ll never have to guess in your design process.

That’s why the original PVRA site opens the way it does, reading:

“Experience serenity in sustainable travel”

It’s not trying to overexplain everything, but it instantly sets a tone. Like stepping into the first room of Palazzo Molteni, you don’t need a guide immediately; you just need to feel where you are.

Even the pacing of the original site, the space between sections, the way nothing rushes you, that’s intentional too. Because both of those personas we talked about aren’t in a rush. So why would the experience be? The one thing I really want to drive home is that Strategy isn’t something you add on top of design. It’s the reason why good design feels the way it does.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed by designing without taking steps to process before creating, like you’re stuck in crossfire and missing something, it’s probably not because you don’t know how to design. But because no one told you where to start.

With:

• the story

• the people

• the feeling

Not the layout.

And before we close this stage, I want to come back to that reference that stayed with me throughout this process.

Because I don’t think I fully understood why it resonated with me until now.

A note from Milan

As we close out today's stage, I want to take a quick trip to Milan. Let’s get fully immersed in this. We’re visiting Molteni&C, one of my favorite design houses previously mentioned, through its publication M Magazine, the images by Molteni Group you’ve seen in this article. In this magazine, Molteni writes that as a way to “translate the quality of the (Molteni) Group’s beauty and craftsmanship into different forms of communication…the spirng issue aimed to highlight and draw inspiration from 2D historial matierial such as graphic design, photographs, advertising capaigns, and blueprints, to bring their readers in closer as an invitation to reflect on the power of words, messages, images” and design that narrarates their modern story spanning over the course of the past 90 years.

Going back to their creative director Van Duysen, I want to take a moment to go over an interview in this magazine where he spoke about the role of strategy in the environments we create, from the architectural significance to the role specific products play in emoting emotion and enhancing comfort with spatial harmony.

In an age of digital experiences, spatial comfort needs to be a priority. The environments we create should stay away from being artificial or superficial, and instead we should aim to connect with real people; once again, authenticity reigns supreme, as spaces should feel welcoming and “give comfort, so that people will come back. There needs to be synergy between space and products.”

When asked what the role of narrative plays in his work, Van Duysen said

It’s often connected to the resonance of the space. Take the August hotel in Antwerp, for instance: I was working with a neoclassical building that had been a military hospital and convent, where nuns cared for the wounded. The narrative here was about adapting it’s historical essence for modern use. By maintaining the vaulted ceilings, arched windows and monastic simplicity, it respects the building’s past while integrating contemporary comforts. Sometimes, though, it’s more about emphassising the spatial context than the history. That was the case for Casa M, a house I created for myself in Alentejo as a labour of love — I aimed to amplify the Portuguese landscape, it’s stillness, it’s colours, through design.

I think my approach to storytelling is best embodied in a recent project: Palazzo Molteni in central Milan., which beautifully intertwines the stories of historic Milan and Molteni&C. The neoclassical building was built in the 19th century for one of the city’s leading families. To honour the palazzo’s Lombard style, while creating a space for Molteni&C, I reimagined it as the home of an art and design collector. I created a sequence of seven rooms that wind thier way up the seven-story building, each named after iconic Molteni&C [design pieces] elements: Milano, Proscafo, Papyro, Gio Ponti Archives and Monk. On the walls are images fom the archives of this 90-year old company. Although it is a palazzo, with all the grandeur one would expect, it is also now a kind of domestic universe. With this project, I aimed to create the best expression of what Milan means.

The project Van Duysen referred to in this interview was the previously mentioned palazzo, and what makes it so special that we touched on earlier is this:

Although this space holds all the grandeur you would expect from a palazzo,
it also becomes something more intimate when it’s given the perspective of being a home on historic ground.

It’s a space that doesn’t erase what came before but builds with it, allowing something new to emerge. Designing in this way is all about creating something with the same backbone, something that feels like it belongs to the story that came before it, though it’s its own being.

This is what I’ve done with this project, PVRA, and why it took me so long to revisit this process, especially as it continues to evolve with each stage of my design process.

In the next stage, we’ll start to see how the initial spark, creative direction, and ux strategy all get a bit closer to coming alive with Stage 4: Visual Identity.

As a recap, in Stage 3 we’ve set the foundation and talked strategy. Once the story, the people, and the intention are clear, designing becomes less about decoration and more about authentic expression meeting intentional connection✨

The Process:

• Stage 1: The Spark - ideas, discovery, that big picture thinking moment

• Stage 2: Creative Direction - Aesthetic themes, Materials, textures, cultural references, Tone & keywords, “If PVRA were a feeling...” type of vibe

• Stage 3: Brand & UX Strategy - Values, Audience, Low-fidelity wireframes, Sketches, Competitor Analysis, Goals, Storytelling (where we are today)

• (Up Next) Stage 4: Visual Identity Reveal - Sketches, Logo Evolution, Typography & Colors, Brand Applications, Mockups

• Stage 5: Design - Sitemap, High Fidelity wireframes, accessibility checks, responsiveness, motion design (this list only represents the site updates).

• Stage 6 - Soft Launch & Reflection - Final site preview, Lessons learned, Creative reflection, What’s next?

  ---

Stay up to date with my journey + Link to support 🦋:

🔗Tip Jar 🔗Youtube 🔗My Portfolio 🔗My Gallery 🔗Design Client Questionnaire

Ok I’m so excited for this!! I’ve been thinking this idea over for a few good months now, and I thought, why not finally make this joint happen?

I have gathered a list of my favorite creators I’ve been getting into this spring, mostly the women whose content I’ve been absorbing on the daily. If I could describe this list in one sentence, it’d be:

Wellness, femme & queer voices empowering others and with chill chats on wanting more.

And before we get into it, hey I’m Alyah and this is my Designer Diaries. I’m an artist, designer, and director and I like to write about my journey from leaving tech to doing my own thing. Also, I’ll be giving a quick update at the end of the article on what’s been going on bts and what’s coming :)

1. Florence Given

If you haven’t heard of this woman, please find your way to your nearest exit to stop by your local bookstore or grab your phone to locate your podcast app of choice.

I have been listening to The Florence Given Show for a few months now, and I fuckin love this woman!

She is everything. Her style, her perseverance, her ambition, her moving from London to Los Angeles to find her next chapter in life?? I mean hello, she’s everything. I just finished listening to an episode about shifting from identifying as a doer (action-oriented, think Virgo, Capricorn, Taurus energy) to just being. The shift from doer to just being is a hard one for many of us who are used to getting things done on our own, and I really appreciate how Florence approached this topic in her Sagittarian way.

But, if I’d recommend anything by her just to get a taste, it’s the episode titled make them say '“who does she think she is?”

Also, be sure to check out her art on her website :)

The website: https://www.flossgiven.com/

Her substack:

2. Ri Turner - For the healthy hoes (FTTH)

Whenever I need a reset, I tend to find myself listening to For The Healthy Hoes podcast. I haven’t seen a recent upload in a minute, probably a well-deserved and much-needed summer break, but I love how each episode starts with a reset to ease the audience out of wherever they were before they clicked on, and ease into the energy the latest episode brings.

The structure of this show actually inspired me in the process of making Wealthy Artists, so I hope y’all can pick up and see the connections/inspiration. If I’d start on any episode, I’d recommend (SOL)ITUDE, which I’ve linked below.

And if you’re still wondering what type of vibe you should expect, check how homegirl is holding smoldering paolo santo in a room enhanced by an iconic Bauhaus poster and a dimmed orange light behind her. That’s the vibe.

3. Georgina - This is for the late bloomers

Now if you need to know anything, Georgie may be a late bloomer, but she has bloomed beautifully (and she’s still blooming!!) She’s literally taken her channel and turned it into a safe space for everyone, especially those who feel like they’re behind in life in one aspect of another.

I love how she’s documented her journey and how she’s finally getting her flowers. Below, I’ve linked her video that blew her channel up, but she’s made so many more beautiful videos around topics like healing, health, relationships, boundaries, and ofc, how to take a beautiful shot with your gear. My favorite is 34 and never been in a relationship, a video she made as a reflection on love, relationships, and boundaries (familial, platonic, and romantic). This is one of her videos that resonated with me the most, especially when it comes to choosing to keep your own peace rather than filling someone else’s cup, whether that be in a romantic partnership or through family.

In her own words: This is for the late bloomers, the soft hearts, and the ones learning to choose themselves 🌱
this channel is about growing into yourself, romanticizing the everyday, and blooming in your own time.
subscribe for cinematic vlogs, solo adventures, reflective storytelling, and the beauty of becoming.

4. Shakayla Felice

Shakayla’s videos have been popping up on my feed for at least a year, but I believe she’s been posting recipes since 2023. To me, Shakalya is known for her easy, bright and nutritious plant-based recipes.

What I love most about her content is that her work is for everyone, but she’s helped further open up the world of veganism and plant-based eating to a larger demographic of black and brown people here in the US. And if you know anything about our community, health and our foods have historically been lacking. Whether it be due to lack of nutritional education, resources due to food deserts, or funding to purchase nutritious foods due to financial blocks and caps that have kept communities of color marginalized and unhealthy for generations.

As someone who already was following plant-based recipes from black and brown creators like Tabitha Brown, Pick Up Limes, and Nisha’s Rainbow Plant Life for years, I still find so much to learn and try with each recipe Shakalya comes out with. The first recipe that I tried was her chimichurri bean salad, and my most recent fav is a recipe for Caesar Salad tacos with crispy capers to garnish.

Find Shakalya’s recipes here on Substack.

Her Substack:

5. Jimena Agra

For all of my art girlies, this channel is for you. Her work is def whimsical as she paints wildlife, nymphs, and fairy-like beings. I found Jimena’s channel while she was finishing a painting and prepping for an art show that was themed for 2026’s Year of the Fire Horse. This was the first video I saw by her, but it helped inspire me to paint when I thought it may not be “ok” for me to paint (I was worried about packing my studio to move). I also appreciate how this was a pov I don't see often, a bit of the behind-the-scenes prep of completing a painting to have it ready for a gallery exhibit she was invited to be part of. As an artist who’s only imagined what it could look like and feel like to have that opportunity, I’m very appreciative that more creators like Jimena share their experience.

Though I’d love it if she posted on her channel more, I think it’s been a few months since her last post; I still love her work and how she inspired me and so many others to pick up our paints again.

6. Renee Daniela - Own By Femme.Tv

Renee Daniela has been one of my favorite expanders when it comes to not only owning my own home, but using content creation to build a dream life as a black girlie who loves travel, expressing authentic style, having nourishing experiences, and having fun creating while building a community. She’s an LA-based creator from the UK. Yes, another girlie like Florence. Idk what it is about the UK girlies and LA, but as an east-coaster, I kinda get it.

I found her channel when she decided to do a 100 video challenge. Basically, she posts 100 videos on her YT channel, and she would see what comes from it, what she learns, and hopefully it would contribute to her goal of being a bicoastal girlie with her dream NYC apartment.

She recently was doing the 75 Hard challenge; tbh, her journey has gotten me to start my own version of the challenge. And yes, this is the second challenge I’ve mentioned! Renee Daniela has this contagious, inspiring, and enthusiastic energy that not only gets you excited about her new goals, but makes you want to set new goals for yourself in whatever area of life you want. Something she mentioned as she was nearing the end of 75-hard is that no matter what she does, she tries her best not to push unnecessarily hard by rushing or having perfection, instead focusing on taking care of herself and creating a life of joy.

I dropped the link to her house tour, which is one of the things she’s known for. Her interior design style is just perf. The epitome of a single black woman living in her joy.

Follow Renee Daniela on Youtube, Facebook, and IG

7. Calista - @braiding.seagrass

If you’ve been looking to stop doomscrolling, or just to get a different perspective than the one you’re used to, I invite you to the coast of California to check out the marine life through Calista’s pov.

She takes trips to the Southern California coast with her scuba equipment and films what she finds while talking about the marine biology of the whimsical creatures that live in the watery realms she explores.

From caves to the large surf, she takes us into her world with the help of science. If you were one of those kids who collected rocks or studied plants or animals growing up, then you’ll definitely find her channel nostalgic and super fun. Each video is relatively short but long enough to take a beat and reset from the overwhelming digital landscape we’re used to.

And once again, in her own words: Welcome to my digital nature diary! A place where ocean stories, field notes, and personal reflections are braided together. Step into my corner of the world! Join me as I explore the natural world, connect with people, and search for ways to make conservation feel less distant and more like home.

8. Zane Parker - Zane’s Joint

Now, if you know me irl, you know Zane is definitely my vibe.

Triple Aquarius. Funny as hell. Proud gay man. And I’m pretty sure he’s from the DMV too, which ties everything together so beautifully. Zane Parker makes exceptional commentary and analysis videos on films. He’s particularly known for his love of the horror genre, but he’s broken this mold with videos in other genres, like High School Musical, Brokeback Mountain, Bring It On, The School of Rock, Catwoman, To Wong Foo, Moonlight, Showgirls, The Perks of Being a Wallflower and more.

His work feels nostalgic, reminding us of times from not too long ago, anywhere from being a zillienial kid in the 2000s watching Honey, to getting into the camp vibe of Clue by wearing a suit matching Waddworth’s.

There are sooo many videos I could recommend from his channel, as I have already mentioned a lot of them, but my favorite was definitely Clue, as it’s in my top 5 favorite films of all time, and his analysis was amazing, as always.

Bonus! Gloria - Gloyoyo

Last but certainly not least is my favorite Philly teacher, and no I’m not talking about Janine or Barbara Howard. Gloria, or Gloyoyo, has been my, and many other people’s, favorite part of picking up our phones.

From her collection of kitchen jellycats, her quickest recipe to make ganache, to her contagious curiosity to try something new as a recipe with what she has, Gloria’s videos are the pick-me-up that so many of us need on the daily. Though her content is all about food, she finds a way to talk about topics that are important to her, including her day job as a special education teacher in the Philly school system.

Before the 2025-2026 school year ended, she posted about a student who had impacted her life and had unfortunately passed away. She didn't say much about the student, but the way she spoke about them made me respect Glo so much more as someone who’s more than the food creator persona she’s known as.

One day, Gloria had her camera ready for a lunch chit-chat, something she does normally, but this time she had a red and black bull Beanie Baby her former student had gifted to her. The story Gloria shared about this student, and how she had been touched by their character and sweetness, made many of us tear up. Something she said was that although we can’t really control all aspects of our lives, we all have a chance to appreciate what we do have and make the best of it while we can 💕.

You can find her on Tiktok and, my personal favorite, Youtube.

Designer Diaries Updates

Firs,t tysm for making it this far 🥹 and as promised, here are the updates!

If you’ve seen my last posts, you know I mentioned how I’ve been working on a lot and doing my best to take my time with editing and posting. If you’ve been here for a minute, you know that having time to rest and reset is essential to everything I do, both work and real life, and having this balance is something I will do my best to maintain as I continue to grow. Hell, the growth should also bring in the right team to help me as they get to manage things I’ve been doing (things that aren’t my zone of genius). All of this to say, we’re so close to getting the first few episodes of my series up, annnnd

I’m excited to announce Wealthy Artist is officially live!

I mentioned this before, but I’m finishing up editing the first two episodes, and I’m interviewing for the next guests to have on. And I would love the chance to interview each creator that I mentioned in this post; a girl can dream 🦋

My goal with Wealthy Artist is to create a collaborative piece of visual art and discussion. To not only create for giggles and fun with people who inspire me but to have the work resonate with y’all.

So if you feel called, let me know what you’d like to see from a series like this. Who would you like to have on? What conversations do you want to hear creatives have? Anything that's been on your mind that you're passionate about?

So far, topics include:

• the power of graphic design in history: protests, civil rights

• international pov versus the US on art

• lessons from corporate for your younger self

• pivoting to something that lights you up

• being a creator & entrepreneur

• boundaries and self-worth

• creating time and space for your joy

• starting a business

• scarcity behind what it means to be an artist, who gets to be an artist

  and more

that’s all for today. Leaving you with one of my favorite lines, we don’t ower perfection to the internet but we owe honesty to ourselves

Stay up to date with my journey + Link to support 🦋:



🔗Tip Jar 🔗Youtube 🔗My Portfolio 🔗My Gallery🔗Design Client Questionnaire 🔗Creative Flow Chats

“If this week had a soundtrack, it would be a primal scream. Uranus (the planet of loud disruptions) is stationing direct in Taurus, within a degree of the fixed star Algol (the blinking eye of Medusa). Translation: Swallowing your rage is not an option. But channeling it is the remedy.”
Chani Jan 26th-Feb 1st

Preface

I can’t lie y’all, I started writing this January 31st, and ofc it’s now no longer winter nor spring… bitch it’s leo season 😭 but everything comes in right on time. At least that’s what I’ve been telling myself :)

And that’s what I’ve trusted whenever I came back to continue writing this, which is probably the most lengthy piece I’ve posted.

I wrote about my findings before, during, and after the leo full moon. And now I’m finishing this right before the full moon in Aquarius. So, as a quick reminder, in case you’re new here, I’m a Leo stellium and Aquarius rules over my second house, and it’s where my south node is. So this week, today being July 28th, leading up to this lunar event has felt emotionally karmic to say the least. But it’s been beautiful, especially as I can reflect and have this journal entry spanning months of growth, digging deeper into my authenticity, and finding sparks that I thought I lost a long time ago. It feels that all this work from January to now in late July has come to a head and I’m in bloom 🌺

.

Earlier this year, right as the leo full moon was nearing its peak, I wholeheartedly felt it. I was worried that if I kept writing with all that was going on in my life at that time, this piece just wouldn’t hit the way I wanted it to. I knew that I needed more time to let the flavors develop. Arguably, things can be fine-tuned even more, but I’m glad I waited for the right pockets of space to sit and write. Allowing myself not to feel rushed. And now I get to share these bits and pieces with yall :)

Friday, Jan 30th: Nearing the Leo Full Moon

I think the best way to start this piece is with music, and it's partly because I’m blasting some now as I write. The depth and raw dark fem energy from Slayyyter, Amaarae, Charli xcx and Gaga very much reflects how I felt last week into the weekend. Look for songs of inspo at the end to get a better picture of the playlist.

On one hand, I was excited, blasting my favorite songs, creating this cute scrapbook image, then I was reminded that I was still in a physical space where I’m challenged the more I am myself.

Growing up, this challenge led me to feel like a bit of black sheep, and taught me how to get into hermit mode, to hide, so that I can just be. So that I can create in peace. And it’s something I’ve been learning to grow with, to feel safe being but being seen.

Hermit mode is what happened when I came back from Austin in November 2025, when the magnetic high of a magical girls’ trip weekend finally came to an end, back to reality with my surroundings.

It got quiet, then really quiet as winter began, and thank goodness it did, because I found that inner rage and curiosity that had been buried over months of constant movement. This breakthrough led to my creativity and pure joy peeking its head up as January ended.

I remember even thinking this past week, I wish I could just be supported and loved no matter what by the same people who I’ve been raised to treat with love and respect; only a few minutes later, to realize that no matter what, if I’m supported or not, I have the choice to continue on my own, for me.

-

If this full moon has taught me anything, as a Leo stellium blasting MAYHEM, it’s that throughout my life I’ve continuously made the choice to continue, especially when things were unfair, disrespectful, or whatever other monkey wrench adjective you wanna throw in.

I’ve learned to alchemize.
To keep going, and I needed to give myself wayy more credit for how much I’ve lifted up for myself, lifted up others who I have and haven’t met, and sometimes shown light to people I have met who lacked acknowledging how I impacted them.

And it’s about damn time I pour all the energy I’ve spent worrying about what others think back into myself.

I clocked that everything that happened from September 2025 into the holiday season was leading to this crucible moment on the full moon, because that's what this week feels like. A crucible.

I’m not sure how else to say this but it feels like a fast and slick unwrapping I’ve been hesitant to let happen after months of ripening.

And it all started with a Friday morning meeting.

My 2026 brand updates

This past friday (before the leo full moon in january) I had a Creative Consult catch up with Kimberly at , a friend and a fellow brand+web design girlie as I needed trusted eyes for this process. We began collabing and reflecting on my brand, where I’m going, and who I am.

I think my favorite part from this catch up was being validated outwardly for something I’ve been picking up about myself more frequently, as I’m still getting to know myself better. How I’m both edgy and soft.

How I oscillate between being easily giddy and excitable, but also laid back and introspective. Not completely bubbly all the time, and not all clean cut. A trend that came up throughout the weekend after this meeting.

During our time, we spoke about many things, from celebrating how on point our initial concept was, to going over the Pinterest board that literally made me want to giggle and dance around—everything felt so aligned and once again, I felt so seen.

Then we spoke about some creative blocks I’ve been facing, what’s been holding me back as I start to move forward.

This is a reader-supported publication about design, art, and wellness. I’d love if you’d consider sticking around and becoming a subscriber ♡

February: Tests and boundary setting

This weekend felt pretty easeful.

Saturday went by, and I was sort of amazed at how quiet things were. I started to do some work on a brand book in the morning, switched to writing a new substack draft, edited a couple of videos, and spent the rest of the day as a selfcare day.

Then sunday felt off.

Once again, it was quiet, but I could feel a change in the air. So much so that I had to stop and clarify if I was understanding what someone was saying to me (a moment I later realized an individual was asking me to back away from my own worth to make them feel better about how they perceive me); I had enough and had to separate myself, physically and energetically.

Even today, Monday Feb 2nd, I ran into another issue with this same individual, as they believed I lacked care and kindness in what I do. Someone I used to know said this to me previously as well. On one hand, if I’m hearing it from a couple of people, then I could be the problem, but knowing who I am and how much care I put into everything I do (hello fellow overthinkers & people pleasers), this left me astounded.

And ya, it did hurt to hear this from someone I was raised to put above all else and someone who I see on a daily basis. But I also understand this individual has a pattern of projecting outward onto who’s around them when they’re dysregulated, yet that doesn't excuse the behavior, no matter if forgiveness is warranted.

This pattern usually stems back to this individual wanting control and then when someone, in this case me, says “no, that there’s another way to get through this”, then things go downhill emotionally speaking. Accusations are made. Feelings are hurt. Someone feels they have to get the last word. Then there’s separation, then resentment.

And in this pattern, I began noting where I show up and how this is triggered by my autonomy. How having the audacity to advocate for myself and others when I typically would stay quiet challenges someone’s worldview, and how I needed to keep going even when I felt hurt or distracted by rogue comments. I began to see how this was all connected with new clarity. Both in my personal and budding social life.

Diving into Chani during the peak Full Moon in Leo: still February

On Sunday, after I had separated myself from the previous pattern reenactment mentioned, I sat and thought for a while, checking in with myself and validating my experience. Then I saw a notification from Chani that the official Full Moon in Leo is at its highest and shining bright.

I clicked it and decided Oh, I’m actually ready to invest in the paid version of the app.

Sidenote: currently, on July 28th, Chani is offering 30 days free of their premium plan with the code FUCKAI. Once again, not sponsored but I love what they do, how they break things down, and what they stand for as a queer and woman-owned tech company supporting the arts.

I wanted to dig deeper than what cool stuff I already got on the free version. And I swear, I spent at least an hour after upgrading to premium reading, reflecting, journaling, and sitting with what came up.

Once again, I felt so seen, heard, and validated. And of course, I would recommend everyone, including myself to have a sprinkle of speculation as we use resources like Chani and sources like astrology as guides, but when I say this app damn near read me like a book… I’m not kidding.

I also didn’t realize how potent Jupiter, my favorite planet, is in my chart. How strong both the sun and moon are for me. How my fifth house, ruled usually by the sun, is in Taurus and directly connects to my tenth house in Libra. It influences my mercury, sun, venus, mars, saturn, uranus (squaring), neptune (squaring), Imum Coeli, and my ascendant.

So when I say, prioritizing this investment into seeing everything I’ve been on the cusp of understanding came into focus. I’m not joking bitch. This was the exact thing I needed it at this time.

I felt confident again that I’m more aligned than I’ve ever been, with the simultaneous tests on my autonomy and the blessings in community and creative authority. Realizing that this is the first time in my life I’ve known myself as much as I do, more than anyone else has or may ever know me. And I’m talking inner knowing and introspection the way only scorpionic folk know, we’re getting deep.

March: Dreams connected to expansion and shadow

From Sunday into Monday (and into the month of April tbh), I’ve had a series of dreams around what I’m realizing are connected to feeling so close to being where I want to be, but feeling like I’m not supposed to be allowed in. Like, hello? Wym?

The most vivid I can recall was a somewhat lucid part of a dream that came right before I woke up. I met one of my biggest creative expanders and showed her this concept I was working on but the dream ended with me being chased out of a space she had invited me into.

And I remember waking up, and being are fuckin for real, wtf? that was such a sweet moment and then it ended LIKE THAT?!

I spoke more about this in a video I just put on my channel, but I'm shaken by the fact I allowed myself to connect with this expander, but then allowed myself to be chased out of my own dream… because I still feel like I don’t belong. That I won’t be accepted.

Whether it be belonging in spaces, groups or rooms, I feel called to experience.

Feeling blocked or left out of potential friendships after it seems I overwhelm people, especially those who know my calmer side first, then feel my lightening edge can be a bit much. It can be tough 🥲.

Receiving interesting comments, emails, and DMs from people who want to change the way I show up in the digital reality that is social media.

To letting go of opportunities after I’ve heard no; they’ve decided to move on without me. This dream brought up a lot in just a smidge of time/space.

Initially, this dream showed me that after I connect with places, people, and opportunities I feel called to, they’ll slip away.

That it means I never belonged in the first place. That it’s not “normal” to be seen trying, figuring yourself out, or just plain showing your ups and downs, that every creator has to be optimized, monetized, super engaging, and have superficial goals.

That “being seen as myself shouldn’t be an option.”

And I love seeing these limiting beliefs pop up, because it feels like I must really be pulling some strings.. and I should step back to remember who tf I am.

What I desire,
what I offer as a freelancer,
what I create as an artist.
Who I want to impact, who my dream collaborators are (and thankfully some of them I already know!)

Read more

0:34 Being more intentional about what we consume
7:01 Wanting growth without losing the joy of life
12:12 Building artistry, a team, and a sustainable creative life
14:31 Abundance, connection, and creating magnetism
17:50 The future is created through what you do now
19:38 Redefining work, talent, and creative independence
22:11 Choosing joy, rest, possibility, and bigger dreams
25:05 What’s next and gratitude for yall 💕

Stay up to date with my journey on socials 🦋:


🔗Tip Jar 🔗Youtube 🔗Portfolio 🔗Client Questionnaire 🔗Creative Flow Chats

“its easy to be cool, but it kills your vulnerable, ethusiatic, earnest self expressive version of yourself.”
Florence Given

Last summer/fall was a huge moment of growth for me.

I celebrated a year after I was laid off and left a toxic work environment, and my first LLC anniversary.

I started my Substack and immediately got my first couple of paid subscribers, one being a founding member, and was Rising in Design, annd I filmed my process and reaction to my substack which turned out to be my best-performing content ever.

I left a misaligned partnership, upset but trusting that more + better is on the horizon.

I filmed and was on my favorite podcast as a guest.

I traveled.

I made the decision to take up space as I was, was empowered by others to do so, and by the end of the year I know I disappointed a lot of people.

And I’m saying this with the self-awareness now knowing, I’m not for everyone. And thats ok.

I will be misunderstood, and that’s ok.

Not everyone will like me. And I’m not gonna pretend to be someone I’m not just to get by, even if it means separating myself from those who found me first, looking for opportunity to gorge on.

And this reminds me of a quote I heard Florence Given recite by Dita Von Tesse, in her own way, “You can be the juiciest, cutest, ripest peach in the world, and there’s still gonna be some fucker that doesn’t like peaches.”

I’ve had several interactions with people who reached out to me, excited to connect or wanted to work with me, all for them to either reject me once I show up as myself or they slowly disappear from wanting to know me. And the cherry on top is being told by these people I was either too much or not enough to what they expected.

In one sense, that's totally fine.

We’re human.

People come and go from our lives.

But in another sense, it feels cheap.

Especially when someone makes it seem like they’re actually interested in a shared interest, a commonality, and in building deep connection, all for it to go kaput.

It makes me feel that these people wanted to know a version of me that I never was, and by the time they found out, they dipped.

And I wanna say this for anyeone who’s felt cringe, annoying, who has that liveliness in you that’s been shamed:

Your annoyingness is part of you that some people just won’t get.

You are allowed to be human, feel all your emotions, and be imperfect.

Facing your fears builds resilience.

You get to transform that fear, get back up, and face it again.

The more you reduce this fear, the less it limits you and the more fun you have.

Because avoiding fear is just wearing a filter across your authentic self.

We need to hear from people who are fuckin annoying. And not the safe, watered-down, bullshit version of yourself that you’ve performed just to be accepted.

Subscribe ♡

Please allow yourself to take up space. And take up more space. And again, and again.

It will be uncomfy but the more you’re relentlessly yourself, the happier you’ll be.

If you do go through some shit:

• found out you're a meme

• you're cancelled

• multiple people are trolling,

• unfollowing

Congrats hun, you’ve earned a badge of honor for being yourself, and now you get to keep going.

I’d rather be happy living a life labeled as annoying, rather than cosplaying as the version of myself I was supposed to be.

Stay up to date with my journey on socials 🦋:


🔗Tip Jar 🔗Youtube 🔗Portfolio 🔗Client Questionnaire 🔗Creative Flow Chats

By the way, hey, I’m Alyah :)

I’m an artist, designer, and creative director, and this space is my Designer Diaries. I share what it’s actually like building a business in your 20s after a surprise tech layoff + The parts you don’t see in portfolios or pitch decks.

As creatives, we show our “presenation ready work” but rarely the emotional labor or the stories that make us, as we’re becoming artists, finding success and our own sense of wealth.

This reflection space matters to me because we don’t owe perfection to the internet, but we owe honesty to ourselves. Plus, by showing up, we help those looking for hope and a refreshing perspective.

Support by Subscribing ♡

About today’s chat

This reflection chat happened in the middle of starting a challenge around being seen after having several conversations and breakthroughs with the help of my accountability buddy, and since June 10th, I’ve discovered so much more that I wish I could’ve shared about in this spur of the moment chat.

This one is for the girls who were told they weren’t enough, and over time they started to believe it (whole time they not only built but carried in ways they didn’t think were possible).

This is for those who were doing the best in the environment they were in and weren’t given their flowers.

And yes, to be that girl who quotes Lana,

for all my birds of paradise
who never got to fly at night
’cause they were caught up in the dance…

I never really noticed that I had to decide
to play someone’s game, or live my own life

And now I do
I wanna move
out of the black
into the blue 🦋

Mentions:

• Audrey, The Weekend Poet here on Substack 💕

Where to find me:

• My Patreon: https://patreon.com/ByAlyah

• All Links: www.byalyah.com/links

• Get to know what I do: www.byalyah.com

Today we’re having lunch and chatting about something that’s been on my heart: feeling safe to receive, decentering the version of yourself that performs for love, and what manifesting aligned relationships actually looks like when you’ve done the inner work first. Tbh, I think the latest TBM challenge around Being Seen also helped kick this into gear too 🦋

this is for my girls in their 20s figuring it out, the femmes healing their relationship with themselves, and anyone who needs the reminder that you don’t have to earn what you deserve. you’ve been more than enough this entire time 💕

Support my work 💌

Timestamps:

00:00 Intro Reel

01:35 Welcome & Happy Pride 🦋

06:53 Bevie of the day: rosewater pomegranate & Olipop

08:21 Today's video & who I am

11:03 The jealousy texts & what happened the night before

17:22 Lunch of the day — scoopable salad & raspberry meringue from Tatte 🍓

21:42 Back to the grocery store story

23:50 A new man, but this time with flowers

3…

Read more

Part 1 of the video is fast, slightly chaotic, but overall carries it’s own “lets get this shit together” vibe.

After the break (at 15:00), I felt very Florence Given coded. Slower paced, as I went over my home manifesting journey, photos from my previous dream home, talking about a favorite interior design style of mine, and my non-negotiables for my next home.

So grab a bevie, a snack, or something you’ve been meaning to work on while I chat about my FigJam stickies and the three steps that have helped me manifest ease and abundance into my next chapters since I was 19.

Timestamps

♡00:00 Start

02:41 Introducing, my impromptu FigJam sticky notes

05:12 The 3 stickies and my 3 step moving checklist

05:45 Sticky Note 1- What’s the goal?

07:05 having roommates vs. living alone in your 20s

08:29 sharing a home when it’s not an aligned environment

08:56 Sticky Note 2 - What’s stopping you from your goal

10:44 Sticky Note 3 - How do we fix what’s stopping you?

12:52 Part 2 preview

Break (ends at 15 minutes)

15:32 Step 1 and my ideas around it (art, design clients, merch)

27:53 Step 2 and the last time I did this I manifested my dream home

37:32 Step 3 is just like dating

43:13 Non-negotiables for my home, starting with mailroom and sunlight

51:11 Closing

Ways to support my journey 💌

My paid Substack community $8/month (for creatives and freelancers looking for accountability

Subscribe now

Get my playlist on Epidemic Sound: https://www.epidemicsound.com/community/playlist

Book with me: https://www.byalyah.com/

1:1 Creative Flow Sessions: https://www.byalyah.com/consulting

Donate or Request a gallery commission: https://www.byalyah.com/gallery

Relaunched Etsy: https://www.etsy.com/shop/ByAlyah

Las Palmas prints: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1419647616/nature-photography

DIY your Brand Audit: https://www.etsy.com/listing/1832116660/the-complete-creative-audit

Follow the journey on socials 🦋

All links: https://www.byalyah.com/links
IG: https://www.instagram.com/byalyah.co/
Threads: https://www.threads.net/@byalyah.co

So this morning I was brewing some coffee and toasting some pita, when I put on an episode of The Jamie Sea show. If you don’t know this woman, I’m glad I’m able to introduce yall today because she is an expnadeerr, like hella expansive for people who consider themselves spiritual, artists or creatives, but who are inquisitive and inclined to running their own business.

This episode was all about the energtics behind sales: talking about sales, asking for them, and championing ourselves without making it an ego trip.

As I was listening, I felt called to grab something and just start writing, usually it’s a journal but today I thought why not take what I’m hearing and feeling, to talk about not only my own experience but rather the experience so many of us go through as creatives (especially for people who aren’t used to asking for more out of life).

I felt like Jamie and her team were spot on 1in this video, as always, so I’ll leave the link below if you wanna put it on while you’re making your morning cup too :)

“How do I make sales without being salesy?”

This right here, the age-old question, is a journey so many of us creatives go through.

We have the skills, the product, the air of interest, but how do you actually make an offer without feeling bad about it? And on top of that, how do you feel safe receiving when someone says yes?

First thing’s first, know your power. And be confident in what you know. Rediscover what it is that makes you special, what’s your point of view (pov)? Your specific lens.

Once we figure these out, we can look at what we’re offering, whether it be a guide, course, product, or service.

Here are some questions to ask yourself that connect to what you offer:

1. What is it you’re lit up about? And what excites you about this topic?

2. What are the things you have the most knowledge in? How does this make up your specific pov?

3. What are the things that you are absolutely passionate about? That you can talk about for hours.

4. What are the things you know will actually transform people and their lives for the better?

5. How has this topic changed your life?

6. How has it changed your friends, family, or clients?

7. Why do you want to make this offer part of your business? And finally,

8. Why do you feel people need to know about this topic or offer?

Alright, one more question.

Has anyone ever asked you “what is it that you do?”, and for some damn reason, your mind goes blank?

Btw, I’ve been there and it’s totally normal when we’re just starting out or out of practice.

When we take time to reflect on questions like the ones listed above, we actually remember what attracted us to this topic.

What made us want to keep learning? How can this topic change lives along with the actual receipts if we have them? Best of all, we get used to talking about this offer not as a car salesman pitch, but as something we’re enamoured with that we just happen to not only help people with, but we actually make money from.

You know that moment in Elf where Buddy is like “I’m in love! I’m in love, and I don’t care who knows it!”, You need to have that type of energy with your sales topic. You need to love what you offer.

Because no matter what, your offer has to be authentic, just like how Buddy felt about Jovie.

That’s the difference between the annoying car salesman stereotype and the confident, genuine entrepreneur we all want to embody in our own way.

When someone sees why you love what you do, how it impacts people, and why this is important, they’ll better understand the impact of the work you do, and they’ll also get to see a new pov about this topic, so they’re left thinking

“oh, I’ve never thought about it that way” or
“this is so pretty cool, I really wanna know more about it”

The energetics behind sales

When it comes to sales and the energetics behind it, we’re lucky because this area is a place where worlds collide. Not just between you and whoever is a potential customer, but your inner worlds.

Inwards, we get to see what it feels like to ask, to be seen/associated with, and what you have the capacity to receive regarding your offer and its topic.

For example, let’s say there’s a designer named Drew.

Drew is a student in college who is still finishing their degree in design, but wants to have freelance experience as a graphic designer. They have great grades, have learned outside of their class curriculum, and have experience volunteering as a designer for local projects. The only thing in their way is that they’ve never been paid for their work, no matter how many gigs and jobs they’ve applied to.

They know what it’s like to be associated with the title of being a good designer, they’ve received great grades and feedback about their work, but because they’ve never been paid for their work, they don’t know how to ask to be paid without feeling greedy.

What I’d recommend: In this case, if Drew were real, and we’re looking at these three things

1. What it feels like to ask for more?

2. What does it feel like to be seen or associated with the offer?

3. What is your capacity to receive?

I’d ask Drew to look at how they feel about asking to be paid for their work and ask them to imagine how they feel about actually receiving what they ask for, as this is the one area they don’t have concrete experience in.

I’d also ask Drew to look at other areas of their life. Where are some instances in which they asked for more? Did they get what they wanted, or did they have to settle?

When we sit down with the parts of us that don’t feel steady, that make us insecure, we’re then able to work with them.

We can meet the needs of this part, so if we struggle asking and receiving, try find opportunities to ask for more in other areas of your life. Ask for more of a topping on a burrito bowl, look at an assignment that you feel should’ve had a higher grade and discuss it with your professor, no matter what it is (asking for more, being associated with something, or learning to receive without feeling bad about it), take small steps in other areas of your life to build up your confidence incrementally.

Small steps in increments build safety and confidence.

Selling is the only place where asking, being seen, and the capacity to receive all meet each other energetically. And when one of these areas are blocked, it affects the whole process and how we feel about ourselves, ergo our work.

Another thing is when and how we talk about our work. We may feel like we’re making strides, that we actually talk about what we do and pitch ourselves often, but honestly it may just be us talking lightly around the topic.

It’s like “kind of” talking about something we do, but not about how our offer is actually transforming lives, why we created an offer, why it’s important, and why it’s needed right now.

We tend to talk about “oh its this three phase process, or its this course, or its this guide”

But nobody actually cares about that; these are just filler words.

You’ve introduced the topic, ok great, but people want to know what’s on the other side of it.

How is it gonna benefit their lives?

So ask whoever you’re pictching ot or getting to know. Listen to what changes they are currently experiencing, what problems they are facing, and consider if and how these problems can actually be solved with what you offer.

Then tell them.

This is one of the missing key points a lot of us creatorprenuers and freelancers experience, myself included.

Not only tapping into the energetics behind our services, but also how we listen, talk, and empathize with people, whether they end up working with us or not. It’s all great practice and a good social stretch, especially for us introverts :)

For the most part, we know how important our craft is, or for some who are just starting out, we have a knowledge of how it has changed us and how this industry has affected others.

But we need to feel confident talking about how we can help.

Internal validation and being your own hypeman

Ok, so now that we’ve reflected, you have some answers as to where you’re currently at energetically; it’s time to look at how confident you actually are. And for this, we’re looking at validation and sourcing it from within.

When it comes to selling in general, ask yourself: Are you your number one hypeman?

Because if someone outside of you (a bestie, a partner, your mailman for some reason) is hyping you up more than you are? baby, something off… let’s get it together.

It’s like getting used to charging your phone outside your house rather than inside.
Ok, stay with me on this one 😅

Yes, there may be multiple outdoor outlets for you to use when you fancy (when you’re grilling, tanning, lollygagging about).

But what about when it rains? What about when a storm pulls up. Snow?

You have no other choice but to go charge your phone inside, but if you’ve gotten used to sourcing your energy from outward sources that aren’t always reliable, the moment you go inside, it’s not gonna feel safe or trustworthy.

You’ll start second-guessing your own home.

Maybe I went a little off with that example, but I hope you see the throughline.

You cannot build an energetically sustainable business or have a regulated nervous system without having your own back first.

Your confidence and validation need to come from within before you get it outwardly.

The moment one quantum leaps or expands too fast past their current bubble, when they haven’t the built the inner safety or confidence to expand, they get stuck in their own doing.

Once again, been there. I feel like we all have.

But you gotta be the person who believes in yourself the most, especially when you’re in uncharted territory.

You have to believe that what you do helps people, has left an impact somewhere, and can be the answer that soooo many people need from you.

Then when you do show up, when you have expanded your bubble of what feels safe and attainable, you’ll be magnetic.

My journey from October 2025 - May 2026

For me, right now I’m in the spot where I’ve gone back and forth between expanding, freezing, then expanding again.

It’s a rabid cycle that can feel so defeating and lonely, especially if you don’t have immediate community around you who’s been there and done that.

In case you didn’t know, hey there, I’m Alyah and I’m a UX based brand designer.

I’ve built websites, products, executive summaries, and other visually designed deliverables over the years, since 2019 (back when I was still a student working for free, ps I was Drew).

At the start of 2026, I had my first ever $5k month as a freelancer from design work and a bit of my Substack. After that, I took a break for a few months as I realized I was frozen in the expansion I had just experienced.

I started thinking that the goal I had worked so hard to achieve was a one-time thing.

Also knowing that the visual design of websites and brands is just a dusting of what I can do, I understood the real meaning of my work is the impact I’ve had in the rooms I’ve been in.

So I had confidence, but I was still not expanded enough, not confident enough that I’m capable of achieving the same $5k goal again, since this was an outlier in my history as a freelancer. I had never before surpassed my previous corporate monthly check till Jan 2026.

So, I thought back to rooms I was recenlty in, connections that had been left on the table because of the holiday season: a free project that the client never came back to, another project that was left in limbo after the client complained about an already discounted price and didn’t have the domain or DNS information to complete the project after I offered to help (another reminder that working with family is possible, but isn’t a necessity in growing your business and finding the right clients)

I was also reminded of going to New York in October and Austin in November for the To Be Magnetic book tour stop, meeting other freelancers and creatives I had only met virtually until then, and finally getting a moment to chat irl with Jessica after we had already gotten to know each other on and off the podcast 💌

I was reminded of DC Design Week 2025, where I met one friend who helped me land a majority of the project for the $5k month, and I made other connections. I remembered being offered a personal tour of an architectural design house in DC just because I didn’t get to attend the DC Design Week event that had been hosted there.

I remember the multitude of people I met at DC Design Week who either knew someone or were actually more than ready to invest in working with me. The budding friendships I have felt so bad for forgetting to respond to or feeling like I missed out on getting to know people because we met in October and now its May.

I didn’t realize how, yes these were all great moments that I never thought would happen but they did, and because they did I was afraid I’d lose these connections. I didn’t realize how these incredible and noteworthy moments were causing stress and holding me back energetically.

I had already proved I was capable of asking, receiving, and being seen only to the level I had allowed myself to feel safe within, not to the level I had quantum leaped into, so I fell back.

But personally, I’ve needed to work on expanding my capacity to ask without feeling like I’m labeled too late or an annoyance. To receive more than what I’m used to without feeling like a burden. To be seen as the actualized thought leader and expert I am, after years of being told I wasn’t either and having that reasoning hold me back from getting the support I needed from my higher-ups in corporate.
Once again, I did not realize years later that it was still holding me back.

And I’m so glad I’ve been able to process these incredible recent memories, that I’ve had these thoughts and musings, along with this Jamie Sea episode popping into my orbit today, to help me further expand.

I needed to reflect on why UX and design are so important to me. Who I am now, versus who I was when I first started, and finally how my work has impacted countless lives globally (most of which I can’t legally disclose till July 2027, thanks corporate lol).

Below is my reflection and personal expansion moments from today. Hopefully, this helps you if you have any questions from the 8-question checklist, and some extras :)

The checklist:

1. What is it you’re lit up about? And what excites you about this topic?

   I loovvve creating experiences that feel inviting to everyone, but feels like home to the aligned audience.
   

2. What are the things you have the most knowledge in? How does this make up your specific pov?
   Mostly the ux process and human-centered design (strategy, accessibility, and building with empathy), graphic design, creative direction, the culinary arts, and art history. With all of these combined, I get to say my goal is to not only be a creative partner, but a designer who knows how to direct and a hands-on artist who loves analytics.
   

3. What are the things that you are absolutely passionate about? That you can talk about for hours.
   I’m passionate about equity, creating memorable experiences, and balancing innovative ideation with deliverables that feel ‘just right’.
   

4. What are the things you know will actually transform people and their lives for the better?

   I’m gonna pull some stats for this one,
   3/4 of consumers admit to making credibility judgments based on a business’s website design and branding,
   
   3.5x more brand visibility is achieved by businesses with consistent branding,

   
   90% of consumers shop on sites because of good user experience (easy to follow and is nice to navigate through), and
   
   There’s an +11% boost in conversion rates (from potential customer to customer) on websites with a cohesive brand and a feel-good user experience

   *stats from my homepage which I was just updating :)
   

5. How has this topic changed your life?
   Design taught me how humans have used art to build societies, movements, and create change through inks and later digital mediums.
   
   UX taught me the importance of equity, sustainable processes, and accessibility, especially when we’re looking to connect with the right audience.
   
   The combination of the two led me to go from being a broke college student, to getting a design job in tech, to getting the confidence to build a business on my own because people don’t want perfect; what we really care about is connection, drive, and curiosity.
   

6. How has it changed your friends, family, or clients?
   I’ve been able to inspire friends and family to pursue their passionate endeavors like freelancing or getting in touch with an old hobby.
   
   One of the moments I hold close to my heart is when an old friend told me I inspired him so much that it helped him land a job at Google in a team where he is not only encouraged to grow, but has been consistently awarded for his talents.
   
   When it comes to actual stats of my work, feel free to scroll through my about page and testimonials :)
   

7. Why do you want to make this offer part of your business?
   For the offer, I’d love to give UX audits at $150 per hour. I’ve given out free UX audits for years, whether it be in a conference call, workshops, for my interns, or when I was starting out in, exchanging services with other new business owners.
   
   I’m confident in charging $150 for the first hour of reviewing things such as a brand’s guidebook or what brand assets they have, website, and socials, while delivering an easy to understand pdf full of notes, suggestions, and action steps that are aligned with what they want to bring in.
   
   I can also see how UX auditing can become a monthly retainer: reviewing Substack posts, optimizing webpages, reviewing upcoming social posts, while checking for accessibility, etc.
   

8. Why do you feel people need to know about this topic or offer?
   People need to know about UX audits because UX isn’t just some far off tech industry word, and it’s something we should all know about.

   
   UX is making sure that the new stoplight at an intersection actually makes things safer.
   
   It’s taking the time to notice how many people visit your YouTube channel on their TV, desktop, or mobile device and designing with that in mind.
   
   It’s rearranging the counterspace in your brick and mortar, setting intentional spots for decor, sitting areas, places to ponder, and a place for checking out for your potential customers.
   
   UX is all about creating an experience where things fit together so well that a stranger not only becomes a customer but invites a friend to join them next time. I believe everyone should know about this, and understand why it’s important to them and their specific pov. I’m more than capable of helping with that :)
   

Extra points:

How have I connected with my clients:

I’ve had amazing client experiences, a 100% NPS score in corporate, with countless 5 star reviews (both in and out of corporate settings). Everything from I made the design process for the client feel “awesome and fun”, to my clients feeling “supported every step of the way”, to a couple of reviews from corporate that show the type of environments I dealt with daily, screenshots below

What’s important about the work I do?

Every business that either wants to have a legacy or footprint needs to have an accessible and memorable experience. This starts with their brand, strategy, and how they show up online. As a UX first brand designer and strategist, every project I take on is built to last and make an impact.

How has it changed people’s lives?

I’ve helped win over $250 million within two years of ux backed brand design, supporting industries like healthcare, travel, and government. I’ve translated initial concepts from someone’s imagination into an actual experience that surpassed what they ever expected. I’ve helped draw in 70% more sales after giving a brand a new website that represented who they are and the type of clients they’re calling in.

Subscribe now

Closing thoughts

Okay so, now that we’ve all gone through these questions, let’s close with a bit of a whoosah moment.

Take a breath,

hold it at the top,

and release when you’re ready.

I really want to nail two things in this post:

1. It is our responsibility to show up for ourselves. Our success is up to us. Our confidence is our own, and we have to show ourselves how much we’re worth it and ready inward, for us to show up outwardly.
   (there’s probably a nicer way to say that, but it’s fine) and second,

2. Never shut up about why you love what you do. Just make sure it’s genuine and not ego-driven :)
   

The more we’re able to talk about what we do, how it helps, and how we’ve changed people’s lives, the more we’re able to attract and see which opportunities are actually aligned with us.

The more confident we get about the things we love and our skillset, the more reassuring we present to people just meeting us for the first time.

Think about your favorite creator compared to someone just starting out in their industry. What makes your fav stand out? What would it take for you to trust that new creator?

This is what we all look for and why our inner world is so important in energetically calling in our next chapter and building a profitable business.

That’s all for today, I hope this helped :)

Take care,

Stay up to date with my journey on socials 🦋:

🔗Booking for May and June 🔗Creative Consults Sessions 🔗Instagram 🔗Youtube 🔗TikTok

Implants are removed or reduced, braids are taken out, chemical tans fade, lacefronts are uninstalled, filler has dissolved or been replaced to look more subtle, but that doesn’t take away the impact they’ve had on women’s bodies.

Recently, I was finishing up at my physical therapy appointment.
“How were your final exercises? Did anything change, any notes?”

I should also mention this was a day I wore something that accidentally highlighted my figure.

Going to PT, I’m used to dressing like Billie Eilish, wearing clothes I feel comfortable in, which can translate as unisex, and they usually aren’t form-fitting.

Workout clothes with a sweater, oversized shirt, or hoodie—but on this day I wore a cropped, oversized sweater with high-waisted leggings. I’ve worn the leggings before, but the top was a first.

Virginia weather is something to get used to every day, and it was gonna be cool in the morning but hot in the afternoon, so I chose something I’d be comfortable being in, and left the house feeling great.

Getting back into it, I answered that overall I was pretty good post-workout but I felt some lower back pain on my left side for a couple of routines.

When I went to get this area assessed, I said I think there may be a knot in an area and I was told I needed to work on my sacrum as it appeared to be rotated. Because of this new development, a new routine was added to my home schedule involving a foam roller and standing against a wall with the object placed right above the curve of my backside… and yes I just said backside lol

As soon as I was being shown the new stretch for my sacrum, comments seemed to be flying off the wall about my “Karshadian” butt.

…

Actually, even before I had just finished getting my lower back and spine assessed, a comment was made.

And listen, I’m no stranger to talking about my own behind and having chats with friends about our bodies and embracing who we are lovingly, even fiercely. I was literally playing High Fashion, CRANK, Pretty Ugly and EoO going to PT, like 🤭

but these comments from someone I didn’t know like that….
made me feel fuckin weird moe!!

Like, I had just met this therapist on that day and *their new assistant.
(we’ll come back to this later)

In the moment as I was starting this new exercise with the therapist’s guidance, I was in shock but laughing as she kept talking.. and joking. I’m assuming I laughed as a defense to keep the peace and not make someone feel awkward about commenting so much on my arse and my body, but driving home from PT, and even into this weekend, it’s been on my mind for many reasons.

Growing up in the 2000’s, learning to accept flaws and all

So far in my designer diaries, I haven’t spoken much about my body, let alone shown it, but being seen as me without external validation or letting projection shame me has been a process I’ve been working through since I was 10. And typically, I’m not ashamed of my body. I actually love it, and I have time, art history, and science to thank for that.

But that doesn’t take away from the fact that as of right now, in 2026, we live in a patriarchal world.

We’re surrounded by trends, skinnytok, pilates hype, and other propaganda of what our bodies should look like and how we should do things.

Ten years ago, we started having a revival around accepting our bodies and loving ourselves the way we are.

A few years later, body neutrality became more mainstream and accepted for those who didn’t want to love or hate their bodies, which has helped countless individuals.

But recently, it seems like we’ve found our way back to the melancholic side of beauty standards from the 90’s and early 2000s.

When being too fat was a social crime.

remember in Legally Blonde when Jennifer Coolidge’s character was upset about how her life turned out, and on top of that, having a fat ass? Like, what?!
This still makes me tear up 🥺 femmes deserve better

Growing up in the 2000s, I started thinking about my body when I was 10, right before I started noticing my body was changing.

I remember feeling so insecure because my hips no longer fit my clothes over the summer going from elementary to middle school.

One day, I started wearing my brother’s old shorts because they were all that could fit me. I felt so ashamed and disappointed, like I failed myself for having my body change without my consent. Long gone were my favorite 2000s coded jeans and bedazzled tops.

One day, one of the kids in my neighborhood came over to see if my brother wanted to play outside. When I opened the door, just a peek because I was so embarrassed, he immediately clocked what I was wearing, and asked
why are you wearing boy clothes? isn’t that your brother’s?

I slammed the door and ran upstairs, crying all the way to my room.

For years I hated my body.

I didn’t appreciate how it was changing faster than my parents could afford to get me new clothes, so I wore either the same pair of cheap H&M jeggings, my PE shorts, or roomy Adidas sweatpants from the thrift store. I got these squiggly lines around my hips and thighs that wouldn’t go away, stretch marks, which made me want to cover my body up even more.

In high school, I moved right before my junior year, and only after finishing junior year, I started thinking differently about my body.

It was 2016, MeToo was in full effect, I was 16 and I chose to think that my body was just an object that sometimes behaved with me, or against me (cue flashback of having so much anxiety about how I was perceived as the new girl; I could barely eat breakfast on school days).

At this point, my parents really couldn’t afford anything, but they did what they could to get me some new clothes from the thrift store, especially when I had Model United Nations conferences to speak at.

Also in 2016, I found interest with a guy in my AP homeroom after spending half of the year noticing each other from one side of the room to another. The next half of the year, we slowly got to know each other as our respective desks started to move closer and closer till we were in the same friend group and texting on the daily.

The closest thing I can compare this to is when two cats are meeting for the first time, and thankfully over the course of a year they’re actually cool with each other.

Anywho, by the end of my junior year this guy became my first boyfriend. I remember detaching the pressure I had from my body, when I first asked him out and how everything seemed to flow after I took the shadow and shame away from my body and fell into me.

I started wearing different clothes that felt like me, still from the thrift store and H&M, but I allowed myself to have fun with fabrics, patterns, and layering.

But ofc, even in this relationship (especially in highschool) I remember feeling confused about why my bf liked me, afterall, I was masking how I felt about my body just to try and have a life where I didn’t feel pressured about my body.

Lol, I remember the times we would sneak out of school and do the things teens do, when one day he was just so enamored he couldn’t say anything but

I love how you’re like skinny and thick but like not too much either way

(the way my 26 year old self rolled my eyes and sighed typing this 😭)

Only now, with a fully developed frontal lobe, I realize my ex was trying to complement me on how slimthick/curvy my body naturally is, no matter if I’m on the lighter or heavier side, and the dude had difficulty with his words as we were both young, somewhat dumb, and with a hint of neurospiciness to top it all off.

And over the years, these comments from guys I’ve dated have gotten more interesting. From my “perfect” skin color, to the texture of my hair, being questioned when I have braids or whatever the style I switch it to next, to being guilt tripped to change the clothes I wore because of how they felt with me around other people…
bombastic side eye to all these comments.

Girl, this could be a whole other post about dating as an afro latina or “exotic” woman, smh.

I remember taking these comments like how I took the physical therapist’s comment on my “Kardashian booty”: I said
“um haha….….. hm.. ok?”

I was somewhat offended, confused, but decided to quickly move on and tuck it away to just continue about my day. But we all know, what we tuck away will resurface and needs to be assessed.

The Kardashian/Jenner-fication of the Venusian body

Society is not new to labeling what a woman is or isn’t supposed to look like. From prehistoric venus figurines that highlighted folds and curves of a childbearing woman’s body, to the above idyllic depictions of women in a classical style. Some depicted with more toned bodies like the first, others depicted softer like the last.

But as a black or brown woman in 2026, there's something to be said about having your body being labeled and compared to a group that surgically appropriated and used what has historically been shamed about our natural bodies, for trend cycles and building careers based on popularity in the 2000s.

Now nearly two decades later, the trend cycles in the labeled lane are “over” until our culture is “in” again (we are not even gonna start on those damn cloud bobs, using tracee like that, smh).

Implants are removed or reduced, braids are taken out, chemical tans fade, lacefronts are uninstalled, filler has dissolved or been replaced to look more subtle, but that doesn’t take away the impact they’ve had on women’s bodies.

And no shade to getting cosmetic enhancements or the Kardashian/Jenners, I respect these women in other ways; plus everyone has a choice to do what they want with their body. No matter what, it’s your business, not anyone else’s.

But this changes when you are an influential figure using cultural visuals that aren’t your own, when people do what you do or want what you have on a mass level without realizing some of it is appropriation. This type of impact needs ethics and boundaries.

Once again, historically women of color have been made out to be villains, jezebels, or just too much for embracing their authentic selves.

Do we remember what happened to Eartha Kitt after lunching at the White House? Do we understand what the Crown Act is, where it came from?

Though I can respect this influential family for some of the things they’ve done in different lenses, I don’t appreciate how they’ve culturally made such an impact that the bodies many of us have naturally are compared to theirs, even if its supposed to be a compliment.

Especially after the lack of acknowledgment of the appropriation since they’ve recently chilled out on drastically enhancing their bodies, hairstyles, and fashion after they played with the minds of millions for years. Whether it be directly or indirectly.

When it comes to the therapist, I’m not sure if it makes it better or worst that the comment came from a woman, let alone a woman of color.

I saw how she was trying to backtrack what she said as my face probably wasn’t hiding how uncomfortable I felt. And I’m not gonna blame her for her comments, because I have been a socially awkward girl in conversations and still can be, but dude...

I feel like there should be a rule: never compare a black woman’s body to a Kardashian/Jenner. For the love of god. just don’t do it.

And of course, not everyone who is black or latina has curves. And people who don’t identify with these backgrounds can have curves too. I’m just speaking from my people’s pov, especially as there tends to be a misogynistic hyperfixation on exotic women, especially if they have curves, 2x especially when the femme is influential.

Now, do I think I have a Kardashian/Jenner booty. Hell no. I have the body my ancestors gave me coming from a few lil parts of the EU, but primarily Africa and the Yucatan (tbh I feel like it’s giving Chel from El Dorado).

Honestly, if you’re gonna compare my features to anyone, you better say some woman of color like Kehlani, Salma, Beyonce, Summer Walker, or Meg the Stallion.

There are sooo many beautiful, influential, respected curvy women of color who embrace their own features (and speaking of the Otaku Hot Girl, Meg is a girlie who knows the difference between appropriation and respectful appreciation). I mean, come on now. And on second thought, sometimes its best not to comment on someone’s body at all… 😐 that’s always a safe bet.

Changes in environment, men and healing

Remember how I said I felt pretty great leaving my home earlier that day of the appointment? As soon as I got into the PT office, I was thrown for a loop.

There was a new person there (I honestly didn’t know if he was a client or employee until he sat at a desk and called my name), and I had gotten used to being around women who helped me with my therapy.

And no shade to this guy since it seems like he’s still in training, but when he called my name and started me with my first routines— I was very confused, guarded, feeling like wtf is going on here on this day 👀

Then I started feeling weird about what I was wearing because I could see how it made others look at me differently that day, like eyes lingered,and then ofc the comments rolled out.

And as someone who’s been in my Billie Eilish phase *especially as I’m healing* this was very uncomfy in the moment, even with the air of shame or making me feel like “I went too far” because of others’ projections. I just wanted my session to be over.

For the first time, I felt like an object in a place for healing, and the comments made it sink in past surface level.

The new guy was there for most of my routines, as he was assisting the therapist who had me that day. And I can’t lie, my 4b-leaning self was not wanting to give this man the time of day for anything. There was one point as he was monitoring me where I had to ask myself am I really gonna let this guy’s presence take away from my healing or throw me off?

Thankfully, after that thought crossed my mind, my guard leveled, and I became more friendly to see that no matter what, this dude was trying his best to be professional and not fuck up in his training, and by the end we wished each other a nice weekend (which was way more than I would’ve done when I first met him).

The Sacral, men, and our bodies

Ok, so I can’t be the only one who feels like this is all connected, right?

Sacral aches, working past projections, my body being a talking point, black and brown women being labeled by an appropriator’s title for just being?

On what the connection is, I’m still figuring it out.

Maybe you can see a specific throughline, but from what I can digest, it’s about embracing my power through my outer world.

With my Mars and Mid Heaven in Scorpio 11th house, and my Leo sun and 8th house stellium, and Jupiter in Taurus 5th house self, I can see a connection between reclaiming my personal power through my body, sensuality, creativity, comfort, and how I shine.

Showing up in a new way outwardly always comes with inner work first, and I guess this is the next lens I’ll be working on as I continue healing and stepping into my next chapter.

That’s just my take :) would love to know your thoughts on these topics too as I know many of us have our own stories and experiences about being perceived one particular way when we’re not even trying.

Talk next time,

Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction to my project on Substack
03:17 Where it all started (corporate, burnout, being an undervalued creative)
06:58 Why I needed this passion project
10:15 Spring 2024 Reflections on the brand
11:42 How did it begin? (coworkers, Costa Rica and my eco-resort vacation dreams)
14:59 Why revisit this? (layoff, unhoused, moving, and grief)
19:47 The Plan - my Brand design stages, no gatekeeping
22:16 Closing :)

Read more

I just came off a call with a friend earlier today, hey girlie hey :), and it was your typical catch-up. A bit here about one of our travels, a bit there about the other’s travels. What it’s like in the UK versus how things are in the US.

But one part of the chat stuck with me.

The topic, indirectly, was: when is it finally enough?

I told her I’d probably write a separate post dedicated just to travel and being a conscious tourist. But after the call ended and I started making lunch, I threw on a podcast and realized this thread was bigger than tourism and travel.

It was about dating.
It was about business.
It was also about community and Substack.
And of course, it was about consumption in general.

The Substack Shift

Take writing on Substack, for example.

Many of us flocked here as a separation and getaway from typical social platforms like TikTok and IG. We found communities of writers, artisans, healers, scientists, folks who genuinely believe in sharing knowledge and experiences with others who are more than willing to listen.

Then, at least in my case, we discovered something even bigger:
We could not only share our art and knowledge for free, but readers could actually support our work monetarily. Like, wtf?! For real?

It’s a magnetic way to get paid while creating meaningful work, for yourself and others.

But then we started noticing more and more entrepreneurial-minded creators finding their way over as well.

“Grow your subscriber count with this exact formula.”
“I just hit my first $XXk month from this app, and you can too by doing this.”
“Here’s how to use AI to create a month of articles in one hour.”

Now, let me say this clearly, there aint nothing wrong with this per se.

It’s awesome to see people take initiative and make money using new tools available to them. As an ex tech girlie and aquarious south node, I love the expression of information, innovation, and strategic growth in unorthodox ways.

But the environment in this community shifted.

What once felt like a cozy book club meeting at a local library started feeling more like a 2025 art fair — traditional artists next to AI artists.

Like a glass of water with a dropper of indigo ink. At first, there’s just a tint of color. It’s still water, clear and accessible. But the more ink that gets added, the more the liquid transforms into something entirely different.

Substack today feels different.

On my corner, not much has changed, and this is the case for many of us, regardless of Substack interests. I still get notifications from and , inspiration from and . But overall, there are more creators focused on growth metrics than the art itself.

Again, not bad. Just different.

And maybe that’s the point. To have a space where we can all be in community amongst various interests.

Dating Apps & the Era of Swiping

Then I remembered how our conversation drifted into the world of dating.

Back in college (2018–2021, give or take), like most of us, we were on dating apps. Even pre-pandemic.

And if I’m being honest? A lot of us weren’t looking for anything serious. Sometimes we’d match and never start a conversation. Other times the conversations were full of blarring red flags that led to immediate blocking. Mostly we’d get to the point where we’d open the app, swipe around till we got a bit sad, then close it because something else grabbed our attention.

Of course, that wasn’t everyone’s experience. And we were still teenagers, figuring ourselves out.

But for many of us, dating apps became messy lore. Zestpools of idocracy that marked the dark ages many of us swore to never return to after our frontal lobes were nearly done developing.

A game of overconsumption and superficial connections, fueled by the high of swiping profile pics instead of actually getting to know the person on the other side of the screen.

I say this also knowing I met some cool people during that time. But I also met some… peculiar ones. The kind that makes you refer to this time as the dark ages, right before the dawn of the Renaissance, then later the Enlightenment.

I don’t necessarily agree with who I was during that era, but I’m glad I lived it.

Now, we agree there’s wayy more interest in dating off-screen through friends, matchmakers, and of course chance encounters. A return to something slower, genuine and more intentional as we’re now in our mid 20’s.

Overconsumption Everywhere.

And that’s where it all connects. Overconsumption shows up everywhere.

Fast fashion.
Travel hotspots overrun by disrespectful tourists.
Wanting to make money or scale a business without ever asking “why tho?”
Screen time that eats hours like it’s Astrophage1.

In 2026, we live in a world where more is always available:

More content.
news.
options.
people.
growth.
money.
More, more, and… ofc more.

But still, many people refuse to ask themselves:

When is it enough for me?

Not from a scarcity.
Not from fear. Not from what so-and-so from down the way has to say.

But from consciousness for your wellbeing. Just because we have grown folks money, time, and a full frontal lobe doesn’t mean we should have sundaes for breakfast, spend to match trend cycles, and swipe mindlessly without agency.

Being a Conscious Participant

This post was inspired by conversations about respectful tourism, the decline of dating apps. About watching creative platforms shift as money enters an already nervous space.

Maybe that’s just a reflection of the state of the world. A lot is changing, we’re advancing and all trying to survive.
To scale and build.
To be seen.

But somewhere in there, we have to touch grass.

Be present in our communities.
Support local third spaces.
Have conversations face-to-face.
Create because we love creating! Not just because it converts.

It doesn’t mean we reject growth or money.

It just means we stay aware.

Today’s post is a rough cut, partly inspired by my girl Lehna, partly inspired by my messy MG musings, and of course by a note Grace shared last week.

Why not let inspiration strike and write until it feels complete?

I’ll see y’all in my next post :)