Hello my Darling,

Some things in life are better because they’re repetitive, unsexy, difficult, or fussy. They’re worth it precisely because they ask more of us. That’s the theme for this week.

The rapid acceleration of AI has unlocked some incredible breakthroughs. But it’s also made me realize how easy it is to trade depth for convenience. Content is cheap. Ideas are everywhere. And if I’m honest, I’ve even noticed my own creativity, problem-solving, and mental endurance atrophying in ways I never would have predicted a year ago.

That’s why I think this conversation matters.

We’re constantly being told to make it easier, do less, automate more, and find the shortcut. And while there is absolutely a time for the elevator, there is also something timeless and enduring about choosing the stairs.

The hard work. The repetition. The frustration. The slow mastery.

Because that’s where we learn. That’s where we build capability. That’s where we become the kind of people who can handle bigger things. I see you, elevator... but I raise you these stairs.

Take the Stairs

This week’s essay explores the difference between taking the stairs and taking the elevator in your career, and why knowing when to choose each may become your greatest competitive advantage. If you’ve been feeling a little stuck lately, perhaps it’s not a sign to look for a shortcut. Perhaps it’s the universe inviting you to choose hard. To take the stairs, even while a faster, easier, shinier, cheaper alternative beckons. Because sometimes the very thing that feels inefficient and hard… could be the thing that’s compounding in the background to make you so good they can’t ignore you.

Read it >>>

Macadamia-Crusted Halibut with Pineapple Beurre Blanc

This week’s recipe is every bit as fussy as this week’s lesson. It’s technical. It requires patience. You have to pay attention, especially while making the beurre blanc, because if it breaks, you’re starting over. The photo at the top of this newsletter was taken on our babymoon in Santa Barbara, moments before I had one of the best meals of my life: a macadamia-crusted halibut with pineapple beurre blanc. I went absolutely face-first into that dish (see the sauce on my nose?!). Like many worthwhile things, this recipe asks something of you. But if you slow down, stay present, and get it right, the payoff is extraordinary.

Make it >>>

xx,
Stef

Hello Darling!

I was standing in line at a conference when I met a bright, curious college student, ambitious, eyes wide, and full of questions. She learned I’d published a personal development book for young women, and as an aspiring writer herself, she naturally asked:

“What’s the one piece of advice you think I need to hear most at this stage in my life?”

Before I could answer, the woman standing next to me jumped in: “Put yourself in the room.” And I couldn’t have agreed more.

When I reflect back on nearly every opportunity I’ve ever had in life, the line I can draw through all of them is this: the opportunity came from someone. Someone I met by being in the kinds of places where the things I wanted more of were happening.

In a world of AI, digital, and a world that is more connected than ever, yet somehow more disconnected and lonely than ever… the antidote is simple…

Put Yourself in the Room

In today’s article centered on this theme, I help you answer the following questions for yourself:

• What rooms should I be in?

• How do I get in the room?

• What do I do when I get in the room?

• How do I carry on the connection beyond the room?

Read it >>>

Lemon Thyme Chicken

One of the people I most admire in this world is Nancy Meyers, she is the queen of putting herself in the room. Her daughter, Hallie, has been so lucky to be in the same rooms with her mom from day 1, on set for Father of the Bride, The Parent Trap, and so many more films. Now, she is a filmmaker and homemaker herself, a natural product of.. you guessed it! The rooms she’s in. To go along with our mantra this week, I wanted to share the perfect recipe for dinner parties, because heck, if you can’t find the right room for you… the next best thing is to create the room. And if you’re going to bring people together, my best advice is to feed them as well as you feed the conversation.

Make it >>>

xx,
Stef

Hello Darlings!

People often assume that because I juggle a demanding career, two little girls, a marriage, creative projects, and somehow still find time to host friends and read books... I must just have a lot of discipline. I don’t.

What I do have are systems. Systems for everything.

But I didn’t start with systems. Actually, if you had met me ten years ago, you probably would’ve described me as ambitious, but scattered af. Early in my career, a manager gave me feedback that stung: “You don’t have a system for anything.” It sucked to hear at the time, but He was right.

At the time, I thought systems sounded rigid. I wanted to be spontaneous. Creative. Free. Ironically, I’ve learned the opposite is true.

The more intentional I’ve become about designing systems for my life, the more freedom I’ve created. I spend less energy remembering things, making the same decisions twice, or reinventing work I’ve already done. My days are simpler. My goals are lighter. My creativity has more room to breathe because it isn’t competing with chaos.

James Clear writes in Atomic Habits, “You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.”

I think that’s one of the most important ideas I’ve ever encountered. Today, my philosophy is simple: Plan like an engineer, so you can live like an artist (I share a ton of my go-to systems in this one!).

One of the systems I am still working to dial in is weeknight meals as a family of 4. I haven’t quite nailed it, but recipes like this Medi Meatball Bowl that is super easy to prep on Sunday and then feed the family all week sure does make a difference. Enjoy!

xx,
Stef

Hello Darlings!

There was a time when I wanted everything yesterday.

Every goal came with a deadline. Every delay felt like I was falling behind. I chased promotions, income, recognition, and the next milestone because I believed achievement was something you accumulated as quickly as possible… Then I had children.

Motherhood has forced me to slow down in ways I never would’ve chosen for myself. But in doing so, its given me something I didn’t know I was missing: perspective.

It made me realize I’d been approaching it wrong all along. I wasn’t just building a career... I was building a life.

My vision hasn’t changed. If anything, it’s gotten bigger. Yes, I’m building a career, but that’s only one piece of the life I’m trying to create. So instead of giving myself four years to accomplish all my dreams, I’m giving myself forty.

Funny enough, the moment I stopped trying to force the timeline was the moment I became more certain than ever that I’d get there.

Hold the vision tight. Hold the timeline loose.

Because extraordinary lives don’t have to be built in giant leaps. They’re just as often built through the small, ordinary actions you take today, tomorrow, and thousands of tomorrows after that.

This week’s recipe is the perfect prep-ahead breakfast plan for women building their dreams one day at a time. Protein-packed, absolutely delish Starbucks Egg Bite Dupes.

xx,
Stef

Hello Darlings!

Three years ago, I was pregnant with my first daughter and unexpectedly out of work after an acquisition. In the middle of the layoffs, I reached out to an industry friend, not to ask for a job, but to help my direct reports land interviews. A few months later, he called me:

“Would you be interested in interviewing for a leadership role on my team?”

Last month, working for that same industry friend, I was promoted to Vice President. While I am incredibly proud of this milestone... what surprised me most was how I felt the next morning: Exactly the same.

The promotion didn’t make me more capable, more confident, or more worthy. It simply recognized the person I had already become.

The irony isn’t lost on me. It wasn’t getting promoted that taught me this lesson, it was actually getting laid off. Losing the title I thought defined me forced me to ask a harder question: Who am I without it?

For years, I believed fulfillment came after achievement. Now I believe achievement adds to fulfillment, but self-worth... that’s the multiplier.

Fulfillment doesn’t come after worthiness. It’s born from it. Realizing your own self-worth is a process, but in my experience, it’s the one thing that if you dial it in will make literally everything else in life more delicious.

So cheers! I’m celebrating this promotion with Charlita’s Mojita, which is to be honest a work-in-progress recipe that I thought I would have more dialed in by the time I was publishing this newsletter. LOL. Give it a try, let me know what you think, and if you happen to know a cocktail artisan that can help me make it better, send them my way.

xx,
Stef

Hello Darlings!

I’ve been working on this cookbook for my daughters for over three years now. What started as a humble newsletter to capture my favorite recipes and recipes for a successful life has become a living, breathing project that I am so incredibly proud of.

The concept for the book has evolved over the years, while the mission has remained the same. I’ve officially landed on the chapters and the types of meals that belong in each one.

What I’ve landed on is that each chapter introduction will feature a word from a culture whose food I love or whose people I love, as a way of introducing the recipes and Recipes for Success that follow.

Ronnie is about 70% West African according to his DNA results (Ronnie’s grandparents are in the photo at the bottom right). There is a Ghanaian expression, Sankofa, which means “go back and get it.” More deeply, it refers to the idea that the best advice is often found in the generations before us... kind of like the best recipes.

This chapter, titled Sankofa, will feature lots of family recipes: my mom’s classics, favorites from both of my grandmas, and even a recipe from my great-grandma. Ronnie’s mom and his aunties are also sharing some of their heirloom dishes. Alongside these family recipes, I’m including Recipes for Success like my mom’s “Waste not, want not” and “Leave the world a better place than you found it,” and some originals from my own heart.

When I dream of my girls reading this book one day and making these recipes, I imagine them feeling so special that I had the foresight to compile such a unique piece of work, so loved that I took the time to write it all down for them, and so inspired that I held onto a vision, chipping away at it for years until it became something I was truly proud of and couldn’t wait to share with them… I hope it inspires them to go after their own dreams, even when the process is slow and steady, during the hours when everyone else is sleeping, and before anyone starts watching.

Inspired by Sankofa, this week I’m sharing how Ronnie’s Grandpa cultivated confidence in Ronnie in an unexpected way and the first recipe I recreated after becoming a mom: Birthday Banana Bread. It’s so so yummy, and the same bread the nurses gifted me on the day I left the hospital after welcoming my Charlie girl into the world.

Sankofa. Go back and get it.

Get the recipes. Get the advice. Write it all down. Then share it with the generations coming after you so they can learn from your mistakes and leap from your shoulders.

xx,
Stef

Hello my Darlings,

When I ended up in the “Scarpetta” algorithm (which I wrote about last week), I shortly thereafter learned one of my new favorite terms: Sobremesa. This is the Spanish tradition of relaxing at the table after a meal. During sobremesa, conversation flows freely. It’s when the company is so good that you linger long after the meal is done.

When I think of sobremesa, I think of my favorite films. There is always a scene with friends around a table laughing while music plays. The camera pans in a circle, inviting you in as if you’re there with the characters, experiencing the same high you know all too well from when this exact scene happens in your real life. (Ahem, The Holiday, when Iris hosts Arthur and friends for Hanukkah dinner.)

For me, sobremesa happens with girlfriends, family, sometimes neighbors, sometimes old friends, and sometimes new ones. Regardless of who is at the table, the feeling is the same: the buzzing energy of the collective group. The laughter. The new inside jokes that elicit a guaranteed laugh, if only for this one time, this one meal.

My dear friend Kasia (pictured laughing with me above) sent me the Big Panda, Little Dragon proverb a few years ago, and it’s truly become etched on my heart since. I spent a lot of my twenties chasing what my ego wanted. I’m spending my thirties chasing the goals that, despite my best efforts, I can’t put down, and the relationships that make me want to sobremesa every time.

These days, sobremesa happens more for me at brunch than it does at dinner, so today’s recipe is my easy, delicious, crowd-pleasing Spinach, Pepper, and Feta Quiche.

xx,
Stef

Hello my sweet Darlings,

I recently came across the term “Scarpetta,” which is Italian for “The meal was so good you have to use a piece of bread to wipe up the remaining sauce on your plate,” and it got me thinking about how that is truly the only goal there is in life: to live a life so good and so full that, when your time comes, you’ve licked every bit of earthly deliciousness there is off your plate. You have loved big, laughed a lot, and made a difference to your people.

During June, I had the important and difficult work of putting to rest two beloved family members, my Grandma Gen and my Uncle Paul. Saying final goodbyes whilst holding my babies on either hip was the ultimate reminder of how precious (and short) our earthly existence is, and how important it is to stop rushing through the very things you prayed for.

My Uncle Paul, God rest his soul, lived Scarpetta.

He lived with a severe disability. His world was small, but wow, was his heart big... he lived Scarpetta.

His recollection of the tiniest details was so insanely sharp, and his words so incredibly honest. He was delighted by the simplest of things: nice nurses, good haircuts, wrapping muffins tightly in Saran Wrap to keep them fresh for the next day... and my Charlie baby. When we celebrated his life, my dad said something that struck me: Paul would have willingly traded his best day for any of our worst days. As tough as that was to hear, and as tough as it is to write, it’s a lesson that I’m etching onto my heart: I am so damn lucky. And if you’re reading this, so are you.

My Grandma, Geneva Lucille, God rest her soul, lived Scarpetta.

She had 10 children, about 30 grandchildren, and about 60 great-grandchildren. She was born during the Great Depression with no running water or electricity. She married my grandpa, George Theodore, and after eight children, he suffered a debilitating stroke and was no longer able to provide for the family. After his accident, she moved him and their children to the farm, where the land could help provide and she could raise her family the only way she knew how.

When I remember my grandma, I don’t remember ever hearing about the hardship. I don’t remember a chip on her shoulder. I remember someone who loved her garden, who looked forward to her tulips blooming in the spring, who always had a group of church ladies over for coffee, and who invited anyone who didn’t have a place to go for the holidays to her house. I remember a woman with the greatest smile, the greatest laugh, the biggest heart, the softest hugs, and a home that always smelled like something delicious was on the stove.

In honor of Paul and Gen, this week’s recipe is Grandma Gen’s Lasagna recipe, complete with a food-stained index card featuring her handwritten copy.

If you make the dish, I hope you soak up the sauce with a slice of bread. If you just read this and move on, I hope you walk away a little more grateful for everything you have, and a little more intent on living Scarpetta.

xx,
Stef

A weekly newsletter with mantras to guide a good life, meals to nourish one, and memories to romanticize one. Want more? Grab a copy of my debut book, here.

Hello Darling!

I hope you’ve had a wonderful weekend. Spring has sprung in the midwest, and I couldn’t be more thrilled! We’re rounding out all of our travels for the month, and while it’s been so much fun, I am also very much looking forward to having my feet planted firmly on the ground during the month of April.

I hope this weekend you’re enjoying some time with loved ones and making some core memories. Let’s get onto this week’s mantra, meal, and memory!

Xx,

Stef

Mantra

Sunshine is a State of Mind. A rainy day in the desert wasn’t part of the plan. But a single sentence from a Sedona shop owner“Sunshine is a state of mind” has become a timeless mantra in my life. In this week’s Recipes for Success, I’m sharing the small moment that changed the way I move through disappointment, ambition, and everyday life… A reminder that even on the rainiest days, sunshine might be closer than you think.

Read >>>

Meal

The Best Savory Crepes Ever. I first fell in love with crepes at Pierre Anne’s Creperie in New Buffalo, Michigan. I spent just about every Sunday of my life there (during the summers) downing their Crêpe Provençal or their Ham and Gruyere Crêpe. They eventually retired and I’ve been chasing the dragon every since. As an adult, I decided it was about time to perfect my own crêpes, so here they are. The perfect savory crêpes (unless of course you know where I can find Peter & Anne, the former owners of Pierre Anne’s!)

Enjoy >>>

Memory

New Buffalo, Michigan holds such a warm place in my heart. It’s where Ronnie and I met, where I grew up spending summers, the location of my first jobs, and countless memories. While I’m reminiscing about Pierre Anne’s crêpes this week, I am also reminiscing about the sweet years between when Ronnie and I met, and when we decided to have babies, and all the fun that New Buffalo was the setting for. Including countless days on the lake, and on the river.

What’s one thing from your delicious life you want to savor this week?

Remember >>>

Love this? It would mean the world to me, if you forwarded it to a friend and told them why they should subscribe.

Recipes for Success is a weekly newsletter with mantras to guide a good life, meals to nourish one, and memories to romanticize one. Want more? Grab a copy of my debut book, here.

Hello Darling!

Hello Darling!

I sent yesterday attending the funeral of a mom who left behind her husband and two children. Life is so precious.

We say all the time you can’t pour from an empty cup, but let this be your reminder to get the annual check up, check your engine light as often as you must, and hug your loved ones tight every time you see them.

With love, Darling. Here’s your mantra, meal, and memory of the week!

Xx

Stef

Mantra

Waste Not, Want Not. My mom used to say “waste not, want not.” I didn’t realize then that she was giving me a compass for living in a world built on more. While I’m in the season of using Charlie’s hand-me-downs for Margaux, and sharing Margaux’s hand-me-downs with the next mom, this week’s note is about intentional living, caring for what we have, and why “enough” might actually be the richest way to live.

Read it >>>

Meal

Lauren’s Chocolate Chip Cookies. You’ve probably eaten a lot of cookies in your life. But I’m not convinced you’ve eaten these cookies. This recipe, courtesy of my friend Lauren, might ruin all other chocolate chip cookies for you forever. Crispy edges, gooey centers, Maldon salt… proceed with caution.

Enjoy >>>

Memory

When I decided to have children, one of the things I promised myself was this: I wanted to stay strong, fit, and as healthy as possible for them over the course of my life. I never wanted to say “No” to something for lack of physical ability or lack of confidence.

My 90 grandma is known for fly fishing on the banks of rivers, and crossing them on foot, even as old as she is. She is also known for driving herself cross-country every summer to do so. To me, this is the ultimate aspiration… to be healthy enough that even on my 90th birthday, I can move my body in the ways I love most.

The picture above is from Camelback in 2018, one of the harder hikes I’ve ever done. Just a few weeks ago, over my birthday weekend, I hiked Camelback again, 7 years, 1 wedding, and 2 kids later. Not an easy feat, but one that I am so, so proud of. So this week, I am savoring these memories, savoring my perfectly imperfect postpartum body, and looking ahead to life post-baby having and 55 more years of staying strong, healthy, and capable for myself, and my babies.

>>> What’s one thing from your delicious life you want to savor this week?

I spoke with two people on my drive downtown this week for a work thing — my Grandma, who is 90yo turning 91 this month, and my friend, who just welcomed her first child to the world, he’s literally a few days old as I write this.

I was reminded of how precious life is. The days are long, but the years are short. Make the most of it.

My grandma calls me “Darling,” she always has, it’s a tiny treasure that I cherish in all our conversations together. She’s actually the inspiration behind me calling you “Darling” when I write this to you each week.

Hope you are having a great weekend, Darling :) Here’s your mantra, meal, and memory of the week!

✨ Mantra ✨

The Secret to Living is Giving. The secret to living is giving… but not in the way we’ve been taught. After burning out from saying yes to everything, I learned a powerful truth about energy, generosity, and why the right kind of giving should leave you feeling more alive, not depleted. Do yourself a favor, and learn from my hard-won lessons by reading this.

Read it >>>

✨ Meal ✨

The Healthy Cobb. When Bentwood Tavern (A New Buffalo fav) removed their Healthy Cobb from the menu, I was devastated. After years of recreating my favorite Sweetgreen dupes at home, I decided it was time to crack this one too. Today I’m sharing my homemade version of the salad I still dream about. It’s so healthy, lots of protein, and most importantly, absolutely delish.

Enjoy >>>

✨ Memory ✨

This is my “Darling” Grandma Shirley camping in Colorado in 1954, making breakfast for the campers ♥ I think she’s so beautiful. I love imagining all the life she lived between the moment this photo was taken and the years when I came to know her.

She and my late grandpa, Mark, were incredible at preserving memories through photos and books, something I appreciate more and more as I get older and feel a deeper desire to know my family’s story.

Today I’m especially grateful for vintage photos of the people I love… and for a grandma who always called me “Darling.”

>>> What’s one thing from your delicious life you want to savor this week?

It is my birthday month!!! WOOOO!!! I am doing a few very exciting things this month that I am so excited about:

• Beginning our home design journey! The designer I hired (OMFG!) is coming over to get things underway this month and I couldn’t be more excited! WOO!

• Having a professional cleaning crew come and deep clean our house: baseboards, windows, the inside of the fridge, all of it, OMG the things you look forward to as an adult! Happy birthday to me. Haha!

• My birthday cakeee. Charlie’s incredible excitement for birthdays has renewed my interest in birthdays. It’s so fun to think that on this day, I arrived earth-side, especially now being a mom and knowing just how special the day was for me and Ronnie when our girls were born. As a result, I’ve made it my mission to have awesome birthday cakes for each of our birthdays over the last couple years, my own birthday being no exception! I can’t wait to share pics of the cake!

• Travel! So. Much. Travel. Scottsdale (Ronnie’s work reward trip), Chicago (my work trip), and Puerto Vallarta (my work reward trip). It’s going to be a bit wild being on the road 3 weeks this month, but I am excited for the new energy it will bring to my life, my love, and my relationships!

• And so much more!

What are you looking forward to in March?

xx
Stef

✨ Your Environment is Always Stronger than Your Best Intentions

I once asked a boss of mine how he managed to stay so disciplined. At the time, I was deep in my self-improvement era, reading all the books, setting all the intentions, trying so hard to “just be better” through sheer willpower.

I said to him, “You’re just so good at walking past the donut shop and not going in.”

He didn’t even blink before responding: “I don’t walk past the donut shop. I take a different route.” And I swear, in that moment it felt like someone plugged wisdom directly into my veins…

Read it >>>

🫑 Sausage and Peppers

One of the most famous meals from the “Ya Ya Happy Hour Era” of my life is this recipe, my mom’s Sausage and Peppers. So famous, in fact, that one of my life-long besties had chefs re-create it, so she could serve it at her wedding. It’s that good.

Enjoy >>>

🎬 Buh-Bye Breast Feeding

I recently began my journey to wane off pumping after nearly 6 months of exclusively pumping for my sweet Margaux girl. I am truly excited for all the time I’ll have back, and also excited to have my boobs back to myself.

AND at the same time, I am holding space for another emotion… grief.

This chapter of baby-having has come to an end for me. And while yes, it is one of the hardest chapters of my life, it’s also one of the sweetest. No one warns you about all the dualities you have to hold when you become a mother. Or if they do, you don’t listen until you are living it.

So this week, I’m savoring the final pumps. I’m appreciating my body for all that she’s done to create two incredible little humans and for being their sole source of sustenance for months on end. And I’m releasing the grip on this stage of motherhood, while also holding it with so much love in my heart. Ugh… okay I’m crying typing this. What a crazy whirlwind of emotions! Signing off now ♥

>>> What’s one thing from your delicious life you want to savor?

Happy Valentine’s Day weekend!

I’ve never been much of a Valentine’s Day girlie, but being a mom of two girls has made me think a lot about the experiences and traditions that I want my babies to remember from childhood… and one of my intentions is to make childhood as magical as I can for them.

While I don’t know that Valentine’s Day is all that “magical” of a holiday, I do want them to grow up feeling like they were the biggest things in our lives on Valentine’s Day… because they are! On this day, and every day.

So this weekend, I’m getting out my fairy godmother wand and putting a little magic into our weekend plans, just because I love them and I can. What are you up go this weekend?

xx
Stef

✨ Imitation is the Sincerest Form of Flattery

Imitation doesn’t always feel flattering. Sometimes it feels frustrating, unfair, or even threatening. But what if being copied is actually a sign you’re doing something right?

As we round out a multi-week series of my favorite dupe recipes, I thought this would be the perfect time to share this mantra and mindset that my mom passed on to me… even when I didn’t want to hear it.

Imitation is rarely about stealing and more often about admiration. If you’ve ever felt bothered by someone borrowing your ideas or style, this perspective might completely change the way you see it.

Read it >>>

🍋 Sweetgreen Crispy Rice Dupe

This Sweetgreen Dupe is a favorite in my house these days. It’s spicy, it’s tangy, it’s everything you love about the Crispy Rice Bowl at SG, but you can make it in your own kitchen.

The blackened chicken will rock your world. The dressing is worth making extras of. And the way the cilantro, carrots, crispy rice and avo come together… So effing good.

Enjoy >>>

🎬 This Time Last Year

Last Year over Valentine’s Day Weekend, we took a trip up to Lake Geneva with Charlie for a little weekend getaway. At that time, I had just found out I was pregnant and was in torment of the first trimester. We wanted to do something that got us out of the house, but was pretty chill. The above photo is from that trip.

We’re in Lake Geneva again this weekend, doing that same weekend getaway, but this time with two kids! It’s wild to think how much has changed in such a short amount of time: Margaux is here now, and what a blessing that is! Charlie is capable of so much more now, and instead of looking at the Ski slopes for the first time, she’s out on them.

Writing this certainly makes me think and feel: the days are long, but the years are short. Cherish them!

What’s one moment from your life, love, or this week that you want to savor for a moment?

A weekly newsletter for those who refuse to choose between an ambitious career and a delicious life. Want more? Grab a copy of my debut book, here.

Hello, Darling!

How brutal was that subject line? I know, I’m sorry for doing that to you, especially on not just any Sunday, but Superbowl Sunday! But once you read today’s newsletter, you’ll understand exactly why I had to share it.

On a lighter note… it’s Super Bowl Sunday!!! As someone who grew up in a football family with two brothers, and who now works in the consumer products world, I love Super Bowl Sunday:

I love the game, I love the ads, I love how it brings us together in real life for good food, good company, and good old-fashioned American family fun. And yes, my favorite part of all is the the trash-talking group chats. Everything about the day makes me smile.

So, happy Super Bowl Sunday to those who celebrate. And for those who don’t… I hope this newsletter gives you a little something to enjoy and think about ahead of Valentine’s day (which, in case you needed the reminder, is next Saturday!!!)

xx
Stef

✨ 100% of Marriages End in Death or Divorce

How brutal was that subject line? I know… And I’m sorry for doing that to you, especially on a Sunday. But that single sentence rocked me when I read it in James Sexton’s How to Stay in Love, a book about marriage written from the perspective of a divorce attorney.

As someone who’s been with my guy for 15 years and married for 8, I like to think we’re getting a lot of things right. But when a lifetime together is the goal, there is always something we can be more intentional about. This book challenged me, in the best way, to take a closer look at how I’m showing up in my marriage.

With Valentine’s Day around the corner, it felt like the perfect time to share what I learned, along with some ideas for how to actually stay in love that I’m actively working on implementing in my own relationship.

Read it >>>

🍋 Lemon Thyme Chicken That Says “I Love You”

This Lemon Thyme Chicken has quickly become my go-to dish when I’m hosting friends or family for dinner. It scales beautifully, just as easy to make for two as it is for twelve, and the chicken turns out unbelievably tender every time.

The bright lemon-thyme flavor is the kind your taste buds remember the way you remember life’s sweetest milestones (your wedding day, the birth of a child, you know…), unforgettable, comforting, and full of spectacular. It’s wild how good it is… and how easy it is… and how much of a crowd-pleaser it is.

So, if you’re looking for something homemade to serve on Valentine’s Day, something that says I love you without the stress of wondering whether you’ll mess it up on the first try, I’m telling you… look no further. This is that dish. Oh, and bonus!!! The red onion turns the most vibrant pink as it roasts, so it’s basically Valentine’s Day on a plate.

Enjoy >>>

🎬 Love Muffin Entertainment

In 2012, Ronnie and I decided on $20 as our budget for Valentine’s Day Gifts for each other. What I LOVE about such a small budget is you have to be really intentional about what you come up with. I love the movies more than anything, so when Ronnie made a movie trailer about our relationship, I was blown away with joy.

This Valentine’s Day, with a life that is a whole lot bigger and more complicated than it was in 2012, I am savoring the sweetness of that moment… that Vday, and everything we’ve built together since.

p.s. These are the types of special memories that I keep on our family’s archival website, so we never lose them to the cloud or a flooded basement.

What’s one moment from your life, love, or this week that you want to savor for a moment?

A weekly newsletter for those who refuse to choose between an ambitious career and a delicious life. Want more? Grab a copy of my debut book, here.

Hello, Darling!

How was your week? How was your weekend?

IDK about you, but I love the first day of any month. It feels ripe with possibility, start-over energy, and re-instills hope that THIS MONTH could be THE MONTH. The month you stick with it, the month you finally take action on that thing that’s been whispering to you at night, the month that you… you get it.

Is there any ONE THING that you want this month to bring for you? (Perhaps today’s Recipe for Success about The Third Door is just what the doctor ordered!)

xx
Stef

✨When One Door Closes, The Third Door Opens

What do three free trips to the Super Bowl, being featured on Khloé Kardashian’s Instagram, and sitting front row at one of my favorite stand-up comedy shows without a ticket all have in common?

They’re all examples of the how I’ve taken The Third Door in my own life, and it’s one of the most important lessons I want to pass down to my daughters.

Most people only see two ways into the opportunities they want in life: You can wait in line at the main entrance with everyone else… or you can become wealthy/connected enough to stroll through the VIP door and skip the line entirely. But here’s what I want you to know: there is always a Third Door, and simply by knowing it exists, you can find it, knock on it, wedge it open, and step into opportunities you never thought were possible.

In today’s post, I define what the Third Door is and share my personal playbook for spotting it, pursuing it, and walking through it to create the opportunities you want most.

Read it >>>

🍲 The Ultimate Chili Recipe

To me, nothing says Super Bowl Sunday like a piping-hot, thick, meaty bowl of chili topped with cold sour cream and as much shredded cheese as your heart desires.

In the Caldwell household, this chili has become legendary. The recipe, loaded with more varieties of meat and peppers than I can ever remember off the top of my head, comes from the kitchen of Luis, one of Ronnie’s former coworkers and truly one of the greatest guys.

With Super Bowl Sunday coming up next week, I wanted to make sure you had this recipe in your back pocket, something you can plan for, prep ahead, and proudly serve at game time to hungry husbands, protein-obsessed mamas, and kiddies too. I can’t wait to hear what you think!

Enjoy >>>

🎬 Tea Time

Yesterday I went to tea with my mom and her two best friends (The Yayas) and their daughters (The Petite Yayas), and although we left our daughters at home (the Grand Petite Yayas), somehow the whole thing felt bigger than just an afternoon outing.

Tea is a tradition women have carried for centuries. Long before we had political power or financial independence, we had gathering spaces like tea tables, places to connect, exchange ideas, build community, and quietly shape the world around us.

Knowingly or not, my mom made tea one of the through lines of my life. What began as pretend tea with my grandma turned into a love for porcelain, ritual, and gathering with the women I love. Now, with two daughters of my own, I feel the weight and beauty of passing it forward.

One day I’ll tell them: traditions like tea weren’t small — they were powerful. They built relationships, movements, and generations of women lifting each other higher.

I’m so grateful for the women who pour into my life (sometimes literally).

What traditions did the strong women in your life pass down to you? And when’s the last time you honored them by doing it together?

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How was your weekend? Did you do anything fun?

I can’t believe we’re already at the end of January… How did your first month of the new year feel? As we head into February, I’m re-reading the post I wrote about The Magnetic Mother ethos and re-calibrating my energy back to what I intended for this year. It’s wild how the days can sweep us right back into our default mode… and this year, I’m aspiring to be less default, and more intentional.

What’s one small thing you could do today to shift from default to intentional?

xx
Stef

✨ Boundaries don’t make you difficult, they make you dependable

You work hard to build and maintain a life and career you love, one rooted in peace, purpose, and alignment. But the reality of living in a world with other people is that all of that hard work can quickly unravel if we don’t uphold our boundaries.

Some people honor our boundaries, even celebrate them. In their presence, you feel like you can expand into your fullest self. Others push, ignore, or minimize your boundaries, creating friction and compromising that peace you work so hard for. Around them, you may notice yourself feeling constricted, agitated, or simply… smaller.

Today, I explore how your boundaries shape your life just as much as your dreams do, and how you can teach people how to treat you not by being difficult, but by being dependable… first and foremost, to yourself.

Read it >>>

🥗 SG Harvest Bowl Dupe

We’re rounding out the last of my favorite dupe recipes, with the OG, my go-to Sweetgreen order, and the recipe that has single-handedly brought new friends into my life. The HARVEST BOWL.

We’re talking goat cheese-y, sweet potato-y, almond-y crunch, and your digestion-systems BFF, Kale :) with a fabulous balsamic vinaigrette top top things off. It’s soo good.

Enjoy >>>

🎬 Da Bears

Last Sunday at this time, my family was gearing up to host friends for the Bears playoff game. If you didn’t watch (or don’t follow), the Bears were down by a touchdown and a kick heading into the fourth quarter. It looked bleak. Truly over. And then — with just 18 seconds left — Caleb Williams (who always has his nails painted, which I love) threw a nearly 50-yard pass while sprinting away from defenders that tied the game.

My house erupted.

People screaming. High-fiving. Four grown adults running laps around the living room like we had personally won the Super Bowl. Charlie stood there utterly baffled. Then Margaux started crying. Which, naturally, made Charlie cry. We were bouncing babies on our hips between laughter and disbelief while still shouting at the TV. I won’t tell you how the game ended. (Okay fine… heartbreaking loss in OT. Still not recovered.)

But the whole scene got me thinking about the traditions we pass to our children without ever consciously deciding to. I don’t think my parents sat down and said, Should we make our family a football family? We just were, because Sundays meant games, friends, snacks, yelling at the TV, shared joy… And now here I am doing the exact same thing in my own home.

Some of the most meaningful rituals in our lives aren’t curated or planned. They’re born from genuine delight. From repetition. From togetherness. From what we love so much that it naturally becomes part of the rhythm of our family. And maybe the magic isn’t in formalizing them. Maybe it’s simply in noticing them. Honoring them. Letting them be imperfect and loud and chaotic and real. Because one day our kids won’t remember the score, but they’ll remember the feelings.. the laughter, the energy, the way joy filled the room.

And that’s a tradition worth treasuring.

What joy-filled ritual is quietly becoming part of your family’s story without you even realizing it?

How was your weekend?! Did you do anything fun?

As you look out to next week, can you identify one thing you are most excited about? What would it take for you to be really present in that moment when it comes?

Same question, but this time, can you identify one thing you are most anxious about? What is this anxiety highlighting to you about where you might need to prepare more / give your calendar some additional margin / or anything else?

Tiny little exercises like these, have really helped me live more intentionally (and more deliciously) lately. I hope you enjoyed them too!

Alright, let’s get into the good stuff — a mantra, meal, and moment to inspire you to live more deliciously.

xx
Stef

✨ You’re Allowed to be Hot, Smart, and Rich

Kim Kardashian released a Masterclass at the end of 2025 that keys off of her “Ten Kimmandments” for building billion dollar companies. One of them is “You are your product.”

Well, Maggie Sellers Reum, is her product “Hot Smart Rich.”

Maggie is absolutely beautiful, AND she runs a smart podcast (interviewing everyone from founders with billion-dollar exits, to startup founders getting their ventures off the ground), AND she has a rich angel-investing philosophy that I wish I had know about sooner.

After hearing her talk about her approach to money, I downloaded her budgeting method, and have adapted it to some new financial systems in my own life. If you want to get “hotter, smarter, and richer” this year, this one is for you.

Read it >>>

🥗 Mendo Farms Thai Mango Salad

This salad, inspired by Mendocino Farms (they recently opened one DT Chicago!) is a treasure trove of fresh ingredients and delicious flavors.

This recipe is a more high-maintenance than my usuals (as there are a number of ingredients that go into it), so I recommend making it on Saturday afternoon when the “no-plan-plan” is the plan.

It’s fresh, it’s got mango, and it’s guaranteed to light up any room it walks into.

Enjoy >>>

🎬 Chores or Cherished Moments

The responsibilities of being a parent can be daunting. Even something as simple as bath time can feel like a whole production, especially after a long workday.

But Sahil Bloom shared something like this recently: The work of raising a child can feel like a weight upon the shoulders, or like the greatest work a life can hold. The difference lies not in the work itself, but in the heart that carries it. And it made me remember, that bath time can either be a chore or a cherished moment, and the only difference is how I choose to carry it.

So this week, I’m savoring the memory of my girls in the tub together, their tiny feet floating in the warm water, and my Charlie girl begging for more soap. Because one day, I won’t be able to put both my babies in the tub and see how simply splashing around sends them into fits of laughter together… pure joy!

What’s one moment from this week that you want to savor?

Share it >>>

A weekly newsletter for those who refuse to choose between an ambitious career and a delicious life. Want more? Grab a copy of my debut book, here.

Hello, my darling!

I’ve always found this week to be one of the best in the year… It’s ripe with intentions still being met, and all the possibility of what’s to come.

Harsh reality check though (sorry!), it also tends to be “the beginning of the end.” This is the week when most people “fall off the wagon” on their goals. Turns out, it is hard to break the habit of being yourself.

If you read my work every week, then my guess is self-betterment and cooking nourishing meals is a priority for you… or at least an aspiration!

So, in an effort to “keep you on the wagon,” today I’m sharing some advice I wish I knew sooner, about cooking, AND a fabulous recipe that tastes as good the day you make it, as it does the rest of the week as leftovers.

Alright, onto the good stuff — a mantra, meal, and moment to inspire you to live more deliciously.

xx
Stef

✨ Mise En Chaos is a Strategy Too

The French have an expression, mise en place, which means “everything in its place.” It’s a guiding principle for cooking that encompasses everything from reading the recipe in full, to chopping and preparing ingredients ahead of time. But sometimes I feel like this exact principle is what keeps us from trying our hand at something in the kitchen, or in life, for that matter. We stop before we start because we’re overwhelmed by all the things we think we need to get in place, instead of just going for it and figuring it out as we go.

I hear from so many of you, “Stef, how do you do it?” Here’s the strategy: mise en chaos. I just start. I fail forward. So what if I scorch a few halibut filets along the way, or wind down projects that no longer serve the life I’m trying to lead?

In today’s article, I’m sharing 11 tips for home cooks who want to get in the kitchen more this year, but I think these tips apply far beyond the kitchen. You’ll see what I mean.

Read >>>

🥗 Le Goop Dupe

I think Gwyneth Paltrow is incredibly inspiring, I love listening to her podcast and hearing her perspectives on life. She is so multi-faceted, and seemingly intentional about everything she does from business to parenthood.

When I’m in California for work, there are times I find myself hungry for something delicious but too exhausted to leave my hotel. When those moments strike, Goop Kitchen’s Chicken Teriyaki Bowl is one of my go-to options.

This is my dupe. It’s protein-packed, flavorful, and so satisfying. It leaves you feeling full and nourished without feeling heavy. It’s the perfect Sunday meal if you’re looking for something that tastes just as delicious tonight for dinner as it will for lunch tomorrow (and again on Tuesday… and Wednesday). Do yourself a favor and make extras!

Enjoy >>>

🎬 Ronnie’s Birthday

This week was Ronnie’s Birthday! He was so sick, but he pulled through to blow out some candles with us… not quite what I pictured for our celebration, but Charlie brought the energy! She was overjoyed with the idea that it was “Daddy’s birthday,” and practiced the birthday song at least 20 times before the real thing. She then proceeded to eat cake by the fistful, much to my dismay, as it was pretty close to bed time… but what a sweet, sweet memory :)

If your week has been anything close to as busy as mine, I want this to be the exact reminder you need to take a breath, pause for a moment with me, and think about one sweet moment from this week that you want to savor.

Share >>>

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A weekly newsletter for those who refuse to choose between an ambitious career and a delicious life. Want more? Grab a copy of my debut book, here.

Hello, my love!

What a treasure it is to be in your inbox on a Sunday!

How was your weekend? How are you feeling headed into next week?

This week will be my first back to work since welcoming Margaux. Maternity leave was the most incredible blessing, and my team (and my boss), really rocked it while I was out. I am so stinking grateful for all of them.

I’m excited for my return to work tomorrow, albeit incredibly anxious at the same time. It’s a confusing cocktail of emotions.

By the time this hits your inbox, I’ll probably be spiraling with self-doubt, so if you feel like responding to me with a love note tonight… I mean… I would love that.

Alright, onto the good stuff — a mantra, meal, and moment to inspire you to live more deliciously.

xx
Stef

✨ You Become Who You Choose To Be

I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what I want 2026 to look like and how I want it to feel: in my body, my life, my marriage, with my family, my people, my team, my return to work, and my return to “real life.”

Doing this has led me to defining an ethos for 2026: The Magnetic Mother.

In today’s post, I am breaking down what The Magnetic Mother means to me, how I plan to embody her, and invite you to cultivate your own ethos for 2026.

Read >>>

🥞 Blueberry Pancakes

Every year on New Years Day, I make Blueberry Pancakes. This has been my tradition for as many years back as I can remember. Nothing says “let’s make this year the best yet” like a fat, homemade stack of ‘cakes.

This is my go-to recipe.

It’s blueberry-y, cinnamon-y, best served warm, with a melting glob of cold butter, a drizzle of maple syrup, and a whole lot of love for the people you’re waking up with.

Enjoy >>>

🎬 A Christmas Morning Moment

Ronnie is our rock. His unshakeable steadiness keeps us grounded, and his playful spirit makes us light, even when things are heavy. I knew I wanted to do something really special for him this Christmas, but what do you get the guy that has everything, asks for nothing, and who you love more than anything?

This was my gift, and when he opened it, he said “this is the best gift I’ve ever received in my whole life.” It felt so good to know I made that happen.

Tonight, I’m savoring the memory of our first Christmas morning as a family of four, and the childlike joy on my husband’s face when he unwrapped those presents.

What’s one moment from this week that you’d like to linger on just a little longer?

Share >>>

Love this? It would mean the world to me, if you forwarded it to a friend and told them why they should subscribe.

Each week, on Sunday, I share three things:

• A mantra to guide your life, career, and loved ones with intention.

• A meal that’s realistic and delicious, road-tested in my kitchen for yours.

• A memory to remind you to treasure the good stuff in your life.

My hope is that you get excited to open this every week, that it feels like an invite to Sunday dinner with your favorite people. The ones who butter their bread, laugh hard, and wrap you in big hugs at hello and goodbye. The ones who talk about the big dreams they’re chasing, the tiny rituals bringing them peace, and the (sometimes chaotic) life they’re loving.

Welcome to the table, pull up your seat,

xx, darling
Stef

✨✨✨ p.s. right now I am publishing on my own website, you can subscribe here, but I am in the process of moving everything over to Substack. See you here soon! ✨✨✨