The Chicago Cubs sit at 78-61, good enough for the second wildcard spot in the National League. If you look at just this record, you would assume that they are a title contender, who is just a bit off from the tier one teams. The reality of the 2026 Chicago Cubs, however, is that they are a roller coaster of wins and losses.

In 2025, Pete Crow-Armstrong (PCA) came out of the gate swinging. He dominated the first half of the year, rivaling Shohei Ohtani for National League MVP. Then a slump came. PCA started swinging at wild pitches outside the zone and ultimately struggled to have a consistent bat. Towards the end of the year, most MLB fans would claim that PCA was a wildly overrated player. The reality of him this year is that he would either be the best player in the league on one night or the worst hitter the next night.

The 2026 Chicago Cubs are the same way.

From April 14 through April 24, the Cubs won 10 games in a row for the first time this season. From April 28 through May 8, the Cubs did it again. Then, from May 16 to May 26, the Cubs lost 10 games in a row. That early in the year, before the summer even hit, the Cubs had two 10-game losing streaks and a 10-game winning streak.

This set the tone for how the Cubs would be all year.

For the most part, the Cubs have an upward win trajectory, but the August that the Cubs had has really driven me to write this. In August, the Cubs hit a franchise record 62 homers. This was capped off with a nine-run home run night against the Brewers to end the month.

While having this record-setting offensive month, the Cubs went 15-12. Their pitching just couldn’t get anything done this month. PCA, Alex Bregman and Seiya Suzuki have been three of the top five hitters in the league since the All-Star Break. Despite this, the Cubs haven’t been the best team in the league since the All-Star Break.

They are legitimate title contenders because when they are hot, you cannot keep up with this team, but when they aren’t on their A game, they are extremely vulnerable.

Baseball is a unique sport where typically the top team doesn’t win the title because someone else becomes hot, and the Cubs are certainly a candidate for that.

Yet, this team is just such a roller coaster. The peak performances and the top players are all so good, but when you have a PCA five-home run series and still lose to the Reds, this team is worth questioning. When you then follow that up with a franchise record-setting nine-home-run performance, this team is worth examining.

This team is the 2025 (NOT 2026) PCA of teams.

Week zero doesn’t have good college football games almost ever, but it does have football games. Week zero is only enjoyable because we are deprived of football before it. We desperately want to sit down on our couch, throw on the quad box, and lock in on some elite-level college football.

However, what we actually got to watch sucked.

This was the final week zero ever, and I am thrilled.

The first thing I observed was before any game had kicked off. ESPN slapped together a lazy pregame show where they talked about who would be this year’s Indiana. An impossibly dumb question. How is this what we are asking?

Who will be this year’s Indiana?

F***ING NOBODY!

Indiana was the worst program in college football history. For this to repeat, there are only a few teams eligible. These teams: Northwestern, Rutgers, Wake Forest and Kansas. I will accept nobody else. If one of those teams wins 11 games, makes the playoffs, and then wins the national title the next season, then that will be the next Indiana.

Did ESPN pick those teams… NO! They picked a team that has been truly terrible for so long. A team like Michigan (editor’s note: Michigan is the winningest program in college football history, and won a national title in 2023). Who else did they pick? Penn State and Louisville. How is Louisville the best answer on this board? Dumb question, dumb segment, dumb answers. I know that ESPN loves to put up lazy slop nowadays, but this is the ultimate slop.

Alright, now I can talk about games that were played this past Saturday.

North Carolina beat TCU 15-10 in the Aer Lingus game. This means TCU will suck this season, and North Carolina might be able to sneak their way to seven wins. I did think North Carolina’s defense was much improved from last year, but their offense left much to be desired.

Sacramento State lost to Eastern Michigan. I had earlier picked Sacramento State to win the MAC and make the CFP. I am forever sorry. I messed up.

Virginia proved why they were underrated in their first sold-out crowd since 2006. They took down NC State, who might just really suck this year. Virginia had an impressive rushing attack with running backs and mainly with QB Beau Pribula, who had 15 carries for 110 yards. He was also effective in the air with 9-for-11 passing for 155 yards and two touchdowns.

Virginia is a sneaky playoff contender, especially with their easy schedule.

USC looked strong with their starters, but was weak when it came to their backups. USC is wildly talented, but it seems that they lack depth. They will need to maintain injury luck this year.

North Dakota State is awesome and will win the Mountain West this year.

Stanford has Andrew Luck as GM and Davis Warren slinging the football. They won’t be good, but the game was indeed a lot of fun.

Mike Norvell will be fired after week six or seven. Florida State will not tolerate his failure anymore.

Memphis got past what may be their hardest game on the schedule. They have a game at Boise State, but if they win that, they will be the favorite to make the CFP as a group-of-six team.

All in all, the football sucked, but it was indeed football. I am excited for real football next week, and for the rest of the season.

The NFL season is rapidly approaching, and everyone seems to be ranking these teams as contenders or pretenders, so I figured I would accurately rank the NFL teams.

If you turn on First Take right now, there is no doubt in my mind that Stephen A. Smith will be reacting to some former player saying that the Broncos' preseason game sucked and that they are regressing. They will overreact to a game where backups played and nobody else. They will do this instead of building up to the MLB postseason or talking about the WNBA or anything else that could be interesting.

I have a promise for you — I will not talk about preseason during these rankings. Instead, I will put the teams into accurate tiers that represent how they actually will perform this year. If you are looking for preseason talk, sign up for YouTube TV and tune in to First Take or The Pat McAfee Show.

I will be going from worst to best throughout this list.

1. The “Deshuan Watson is starting for your football team” tier

This tier has the Browns, who somehow drafted a rookie quarterback class last year, Shedeur Sanders and Dillon Gabriel, that is worse than the washed-up probable rapist, Deshaun Watson. The Browns are a dumpster fire. They do have one thing in common with the WNBA, though: they are allergic to good PR.

2. The “New York Jets” Tier

The New York Jets are in this tier, and so are the Dolphins and Cardinals. This is normal territory for the Jets, but a huge blow for the Dolphins and Cardinals. You never want to be on the same tier as any New York team, but currently, the Dolphins and Cardinals are set up for failure, just like the Jets are every season.

3. The “Who is their quarterback?” Tier

Who is the Atlanta Falcons Quarterback? Michael Penix Jr. is a man I love, but he cannot stay healthy. Tua Tagovailoa is a man I do not love, and he cannot stay healthy. Is Cooper Rush gonna be the guy by week six? This team has talent, but cannot figure out the most important position. I am out on them.

4. The “5-12 to 6-11” Tier

The New York Football Giants, the Raiders, the Commanders and the Titans sit in this glorious tier. This tier sucks.

5. The “NFC South without the Falcons” Tier

This tier is for the three most mediocre teams in football. Nine wins is enough to win this division, because they are all so average. These teams, of course, are the Panthers, the Buccaneers, and the other one. I do like New Orleans as a city, though.

6. The “AFC South without the Titans” Tier

Similar to the NFC counterpart, but the AFC South is awfully mediocre. Whether you are the swamp kitties, the people from Texas, or the young Horses, there is always something mediocre about you.

7. The “Could make the playoffs” Tier

The Packers, the Chargers, the Bengals, the Steelers, the Cowboys, the Ravens, the Vikings, the 49ers and the Bears sit solidly in the playoff picture. Will they make it? Maybe; that’s not my job to figure out. Somebody dumber and less qualified than me would claim which team will actually make it; I am comfortable just saying, “yeah, some of them will”.

8. The “Championship Pedigree” Tier

The Chiefs, the Seahawks, the Rams and the Eagles are in this tier because they have rosters full of guys who know how to win a championship. It is in their DNA. They are legitimate threats to this year’s tournament, especially if they are healthy in December.

9. The “One of them will win it all this year” Tier

The 2026-27 Super Bowl champion will be one of these teams. It will be the Broncos, the Lions, the Bills, or the Patriots. These teams have been to the playoffs and have gathered up experience, but now it is time for one of them to lock in and finish the deal. This is the year that they will strike and win it all. These teams are legitimate title threats.

This is my fully honest ranking of the NFL teams this season. Will I be wrong? Probably not; I am very smart.

What does this title mean you do? I do not know… I suppose it means you make statements to the press, but you're not actually good at doing that.

Purdue athletics are in a tough spot right now. Football is a dumpster fire, and men’s basketball seems like they will take a step down from last season. Because of this, McClelland was hoping to rile up the Purdue faithful (NASA employees or something like that). Unfortunately for him, this went poorly.

The quote is this…

“We are here to win championships. If you don't want to win championships, go to Indiana,” McClelland said.

This quote is terrible. He is going for the energy that Curt Cignetti has brought to Big Ten press conferences, but he falls flat. He is taking a shot at the school that won the most recent national title. It’s one thing to say that Indiana sucks… It’s a whole different thing to say that they don’t win championships.

I understand the idea of emerging as confident. Because of that, I understand the idea of attacking your rival, but this certainly isn’t the way to do so. The correct thing to do would be, “Don’t come here if you wanna lose to Indiana” or something like that. Don’t attack Indiana for winning fewer championships than you do. This is not true.

I googled it, and Indiana has won 24 national titles. Purdue has three. It is such a small number that I had to spell it out. And two of them are in golf.

This also is terrible timing. I am no historian, but Indiana just won the football national title, and Purdue just won the title of worst football team for back-to-back seasons. The timing just seems really bad.

Another flaw is how it was addressed. Check out the video of him giving this statement. He is reading off of a paper like a robot. He had no charisma. Now, this isn’t uncommon for the Boilermakers, but it is bad when you are trying to be edgy.

Also, other people probably read this statement and signed off on it if it was written down. So much for being the “smart school”. Although, in their defense, social awareness has never been their strong suit. They are better at putting people on the moon than holding conversations with humans.

Ultimately, this statement was rough. There is one key takeaway from this, which is that every coach who doesn’t win a championship this year should be fired for Purdue. That’s the standard there, no less. So at least Matt Painter and Barry Odom can rest easy knowing their AD has full confidence in them winning it all this year.

I am something of a college football expert. This is because I am professionally hired to write about college football for a media outlet. Because of this, I have a superior advantage in knowing how all 18 Big Ten teams will rank by the end of the season. It is honestly not even fair to other people.

I also have a problem. I am super competitive.

Because of this, I will be competing with my best friends (ChatGPT, Gemini, and Claude) for who can correctly rank the Big Ten football teams.

These will be the rules:

1. Must rank all 18 teams.

2. Whoever gets the closest to correct (according to me) will win the competition.

3. I will give them all the same prompt: Can you rank the 18 Big Ten Football teams based on how they will be in 2026? Please provide reasoning for your answer.

So prepare yourself, because this article will get long.

I will first do my rankings.

I would like to introduce my rankings for the Big Ten Football season. I made this list based on how I believe they will be by the end of the season. Not the end of the regular season, but after the national title game.

1. Indiana

Why doubt the Hoosiers at this point? Ever since Curt Cignetti arrived at Indiana, they have only lost two games. These came to Ohio State and Notre Dame in 2024. Now… I’m not a historian, but I am fairly certain that these teams were in the national title this year. Basically, until I see a loss for Curt Cignetti’s Hoosiers, I will assume they are the best team in football.

2. Oregon

Dan Lanning’s Ducks have been really close to the top of the football world. They consistently have been better than everyone, except for when they play against the best. This season, however, is do-or-die for Oregon. This is the most talented team Lanning has had, and it also is the most experienced team.

3. Ohio State

They are always good. Always. Might piss me off, but it is the truth.

4. Penn State

I don’t even think that they are actually the fourth best team in this conference; I just know that they will win games. Their schedule is stupidly easy, and because of that, they will win at least 10 games.

5. Michigan

They are really good, and well-coached once again. The only thing dragging them down is the schedule. Unlike PSU, they play everyone. Highlights include “the game” on the road at Oregon, home for Iowa, Oklahoma, Penn State, and Indiana. This schedule is nasty.

6. UCLA

I am drinking the Bob Chesney-flavored Kool-Aid that UCLA is serving. He did the Cig blueprint. Brought in 10 of his players and a bunch of others. Also kept Nico Iamaleava at QB, who I believe is wildly talented.

7. Washington

Demond Williams wasn’t sure if he wanted to stay at Washington, but now that he is staying, he is one of the best quarterbacks out there. This team has a lot of talent and a great home-field advantage. I say they will flutter between eight and nine wins this year.

8. Iowa

Iowa is always so damn consistent. They play defense and squeeze out 13-12 wins like it’s nothing. They will not be a title contender, but I am sure that they will still be a tough outing for everyone.

9. USC

This team has all of the talent in the world, but I don’t know if Lincoln Riley can do it. This team will score with the best, but they will fail at defending. It is kinda the reverse Iowa. They also have a very challenging schedule, and I don’t trust them to win the tough games. This would be a major disappointment for the team. Jayden Maiava is an elite QB, but I doubt it’ll be enough. The conference is just too good.

10. Northwestern

The Wildcats are going to have a very good year for themselves, but fall short against several juggernauts. They have a top three coaching staff in this conference, and it will lead to wins, but they will fall short when playing teams such as Indiana. If Northwestern can pull off a major upset, though, then the sky is the limit for this team.

11. Nebraska

I think that because they didn’t make a large enough jump last year, the Matt Rhule Nebraska era is going to die. Rhule isn’t even a bad coach, but he hasn’t been able to get it done in close games. Especially in games in November, he is 1-10 in games then, and I believe that this will continue. At least they have half of 1997.

WARNING: you have entered the danger zone… the next four teams are all hovering the average threshold of 6-6 this next season:

12. Michigan State

They will be average

13. Minnesota

They will be average, and PJ Fleck will win his 10th straight bowl game

14. Wisconsin

They will be average

15. Illinois

They will be average

Phew… out of that

16. Rutgers

This team won’t be very good, but they will be a significant step above the following two teams

17. Maryland

The DMV has talent, but that talent goes elsewhere. Maryland will still be terrible.

18. Purdue

They doubled their win total last season to reach two wins. This season they will double their win total from two seasons ago to reach two wins.

That was my rankings for these teams. Now comes the section where AI ranks the teams. I apologize to my English teachers because this article will be flagged for AI activity.

CHATGPT:

1. Ohio State Buckeyes: The most talented roster in the conference. Elite recruiting, NFL-caliber depth, and they’re the preseason favorite almost everywhere.

2. Oregon Ducks: Dan Lanning has built a machine. Excellent quarterback play, speed at every position, and arguably the deepest defense in the league.

3. Indiana Hoosiers: Last year’s breakthrough appears sustainable thanks to strong quarterback play and continuity. The biggest question is whether they can handle being the hunted instead of the hunter.

4. USC Trojans: Tremendous offensive talent. If the defense merely becomes above average, USC has playoff potential.

5. Michigan Wolverines: Still loaded with talent. A coaching transition adds uncertainty, but the roster remains one of the conference’s best.

6. Penn State Nittany Lions: Always dangerous because of their defense. Offensive consistency determines whether they’re a playoff team or simply a Top-20 squad.

7. Washington Huskies: Quietly one of the conference’s better-balanced teams. Good coaching and solid quarterback play should keep them in contention.

8. Iowa Hawkeyes: Elite defense remains the identity. If the offense is merely competent, Iowa can win 9–10 games.

9. Illinois Fighting Illini: Bret Bielema has built a physical, consistent program. A high floor even if the ceiling isn’t championship level.

10. Minnesota Golden Gophers: Experienced roster and strong offensive line should keep them competitive nearly every week.

11. Nebraska Cornhuskers: Matt Rhule continues building depth. They have enough talent to surprise people but still need more consistency.

12. Wisconsin Badgers: Still searching for offensive identity. The defense should keep them around .500 in conference play.

13. UCLA Bruins: Improved talent level but depth remains an issue against the upper half of the Big Ten.

14. Northwestern Wildcats: Competitive and well-coached, but lacks the overall roster talent to climb much higher.

15. Maryland Terrapins Rebuilding after significant departures. They’ll need young players to develop quickly.

16. Michigan State Spartans: The rebuild continues. There are pieces in place, but they’re still behind most of the conference.

17. Rutgers Scarlet Knights: Physical defense helps, but offensive limitations make it difficult to move up the standings.

18. Purdue Boilermakers: Still in the early stages of rebuilding and likely to struggle against the conference’s depth.

The main difference I had with ChatGPT is that I have half a brain, and IT has none.

GEMINI:

Tier 1: The Championship & CFP Elite

1. Ohio State Buckeyes

• Reasoning: Armed with returning elite offensive talents in quarterback Julian Sayin and star receiver Jeremiah Smith, Ohio State enters as the national No. 1 consensus favorite. Despite losing defensive stalwarts to the NFL draft, new defensive coordinator Matt Patricia reloaded via top-tier high school and portal recruiting.

2. Oregon Ducks

• Reasoning: Dan Lanning scored a massive win when quarterback Dante Moore passed on the NFL Draft to return for another season in Eugene. With pass-rusher Matayo Uiagalelei and top transfers leading a loaded defense, Oregon has arguably the most well-rounded roster in the country.

3. Indiana Hoosiers

• Reasoning: Curt Cignetti’s squad has sustained elite momentum following their national championship victory. Retaining a dominant defense (which allowed just 11.7 PPG last year) and adding former TCU quarterback Josh Hoover via the transfer portal keeps IU firmly in national title conversations.

Tier 2: Serious CFP Contenders

4. USC Trojans

• Reasoning: Lincoln Riley’s offense remains explosive behind returning starter Jayden Maiava. Supported by the nation’s top-ranked high school recruiting class arriving on campus, the Trojans boast their strongest Big Ten Playoff path yet.

5. Michigan Wolverines

• Reasoning: Under head coach Kyle Whittingham and sophomore sensation QB Bryce Underwood, Michigan brings physical play back to Ann Arbor. Though they face a brutal Big Ten schedule, the defense remains standard-setting.

6. Penn State Nittany Lions

• Reasoning: Marking the start of the Matt Campbell era in Happy Valley, Penn State benefits from a favorable schedule and key transfer additions—notably QB Rocco Becht following Campbell from Iowa State.

7. Washington Huskies

• Reasoning: Jedd Fisch’s program continues its upward trajectory with dynamic young quarterback Demond Williams leading a dangerous high-flying offense.

8. Iowa Hawkeyes

• Reasoning: You can never count out Kirk Ferentz. Armed with one of the nation’s top offensive lines and their signature stingy defense, Iowa is well-positioned to play spoiler against top conference foes.

Tier 3: Wild Cards & Bowl Lock Contenders

9. Nebraska Cornhuskers

• Reasoning: The Huskers bring back crucial depth across both lines, making them a high-ceiling wild card capable of pushing into the conference top 6.

10. Illinois Fighting Illini

• Reasoning: Following back-to-back strong winning seasons under Bret Bielema, Illinois looks to sustain momentum with East Carolina transfer QB Katin Houser under center.

11. Minnesota Golden Gophers

• Reasoning: P.J. Fleck’s squad features star running back Darius Taylor and QB Drake Lindsey. While talent isn’t an issue, a gauntlet road schedule caps their regular-season ceiling.

12. UCLA Bruins

• Reasoning: Under new head coach Bob Chesney and headlined by starting QB Nico Iamaleava, the Bruins are slated as one of the Big Ten’s most intriguing dark horses.

Tier 4: Postseason & Rebuild Zone

13. Wisconsin Badgers

• Reasoning: Luke Fickell’s program is looking to regain stability, facing pressure to improve consistency on offense to return to upper-tier Big Ten contention.

14. Rutgers Scarlet Knights

• Reasoning: Greg Schiano’s team features a tough, physical identity, but navigating a home schedule that includes heavy hitters like USC, Indiana, and Michigan makes bowl eligibility a tough climb.

15. Michigan State Spartans

• Reasoning: Jonathan Smith continues his long-term roster rebuild, relying on non-conference wins to build momentum toward postseason contention.

16. Northwestern Wildcats

• Reasoning: David Braun’s squad always plays disciplined football, but personnel depth issues keep them projected near the lower half of the standings.

17. Maryland Terrapins

• Reasoning: Transitioning key roles on offense leaves the Terps fighting for bowl eligibility against a demanding mid-season slate.

18. Purdue Boilermakers

• Reasoning: Barry Odom’s rebuilding project is making progress behind QB Ryan Browne, but bridging the talent gap in an 18-team super-conference remains a steep hill.

Hey, it is me again. I apologize for the format and for my friend Gemini’s lack of ball knowledge.

CLAUDE:

1. Ohio State — The Buckeyes are rated the best team in the Big Ten and in all of college football by FPI metrics, with quarterback Julian Sayin and top receiver Jeremiah Smith both returning. The main question marks are defensive depth and a brutal road slate against Texas, Iowa, Indiana, USC, and Nebraska. Sports Illustrated

2. Oregon — Oregon is projected for 10.2 wins, tied with Ohio State, though the Ducks trail in title odds (24.2% to win the conference). Oregon is in outstanding shape on continuity, returning roughly 200 of last year’s starts. Quarterback Dante Moore bypassing the draft to return is a major boost. Sports IllustratedESPN

3. Indiana — The reigning national champion ran the table over 16 games last year and is expected to finish third in the conference, still with about a 57% shot at another Playoff berth. Some slippage is natural after losing key contributors to the NFL, but the program’s floor is now very high under Curt Cignetti. Sports Illustrated

4. USC — Trojans continue their ascent, landing as a top-4 team in both the FPI order and the media poll.

5. Michigan — Still a Playoff-caliber roster and program, slotted just behind the top tier.

6. Penn State — Talented as always, but coming off a disappointing prior season and needs more consistency to climb back into true title contention.

7. Iowa — Iowa’s offense reached the top 40 in SP+ for the first time in five years, though starting QB Mark Gronowski is gone, leaving the job to Hank Brown or Jeremy Hecklinski. ESPN

8. Washington — Solid, competitive Big Ten mainstay in its third year in the conference.

9. Nebraska — On the rise but not quite into the upper tier yet.

10. Illinois — Bret Bielema’s group has won 13 one-score games over the past three seasons — the most in FBS — and their .765 win rate in those games ranks fifth-best nationally, projected for 7.0 wins. ESPN

11. Wisconsin — Middle-of-the-pack, rebuilding toward past standards.

12. Northwestern
13. Maryland — Coach Mike Locksley enters year eight with a modest 5.8-win projection (3.6 in conference).
14. Minnesota — New quarterback situation still finding its footing.
15. UCLA
16. Michigan State
17. Rutgers ESPN

18. Purdue — Once again picked last, having dropped 18 straight Big Ten games, with an offense that averaged just 18.8 points per game and only a 25% projected chance of reaching bowl eligibility (4.3 projected wins). There were some signs of progress under Barry Odom with QB Ryan Browne, but the gap to the rest of the league remains wide. Sports

Campbell: I am back! This was very interesting. All three of them had very similar lists. All of them are dumb, but similar. Claude used other sports sites and cited them, so that’s fun. Chat just barely put any effort in. Gemini gave me a headache, but it at least tried. Claude appeared to give up on the 15-17 area. Very interesting experiment I have done. We will see who has won at the end of the season.

Thanks for reading my hour-long article.

I probably should’ve done this before the knockout round, because I am a pure professional, but I didn’t, so allow me to present my tier rankings of the 32 World Cup teams that matter.

I am choosing to do 32 teams instead of all 48 out of laziness, so I will put the 16 teams that didn’t make it into the knockout stage into this tier:

1. The “didn’t make it into the knockout stage tier”.

Now I will rank the 32 teams that matter.

2. The “happy to be here tier":

Ghana, Australia, Algeria, Congo DR, Ecuador, Bosnia and Herzegovina, South Africa, Sweden.

These teams were playing with house money, and it showed. They all made it through, but weren’t able to do anything after that. Credit to them for making it through, though.

3. The “Disappointing Loss tier”:

Netherlands, Croatia, Senegal, Japan, Ivory Coast.

These teams were good enough to make some noise in this tournament, but lost in close battles to solid teams. The Netherlands had a tough draw with Morocco; Croatia had a heartbreaker against Portugal; Senegal fell apart late. All of these teams are good, but had bad draws or a bad day.

4. The “lost to a team America beat tier”:

Germany.

Germany lost to Paraguay, who I was told sucked. I was told that the USA’s win over Paraguay “meant nothing”. Clearly, this win meant a bit, as Germany fell to them on penalties. They now go home as a disappointment.

5. The “Park the damn bus tier”:

Paraguay.

Paraguay honorably parked the bus to beat Germany and then tried valiantly against France. Lots of respect.

6. The “they technically hosted tier”:

Canada.

Canada technically did host this tournament. Congrats to them.

7. The “WE WON tier”:

Egypt, Switzerland.

These teams won a knockout game. Congrats.

8. The “Fought valiantly against Goliath tier”:

Cape Verde.

What a game and what a tournament from this team. I will never forget what you’ve done. This team has won our hearts, and they fought valiantly against Argentina.

9. The “Brazil vs. Norway tier”:

Brazil, Norway.

These teams face each other in the round of 16.

10. The “Lost this land 250 years ago tier”

England.

England lost America 250 years ago. Now they attempt to win on our soil. I doubt this ends well for them.

11. The “haven’t allowed a goal yet tier”:

Mexico, Spain.

These teams speak Spanish and don’t allow goals.

12. The “Columbia tier”

This is where Columbia ranks in this tier list.

12. The “relying on old talent tier”:

Belgium, Portugal.

These teams rely on very old superstars, who just aren’t as good anymore.

14. The “relying on good, old talent tier”:

Argentina.

Messi is still elite. Argentina relies on him, and he still delivers.

15. The “made it to the quarter-finals tier”:

Morocco, France.

These teams are in the quarter-finals.

16. The “250 years old as of yesterday tier”:

USA.

The USA sits on top of everyone else.

This is my wacky list of how I see this current tournament. I hope it was readable.

Well… that wasn’t as fun as I wanted it to be. I’ll be honest, I missed the first minute of this game, since I was driving home, but when I parked, I was able to watch the Auston Trusty goal live, and I started screaming. I thought we were invincible, which was humbled immediately.

I do not blame Coach Pochettino for his decisions. It was the right move to “punt” this game* as team USA was in a game* that didn’t matter. But, mannnnnnn… that was a gut punch.

Losing in the 98th minute sucks, even if it doesn’t matter. The US will need to respond fast against Bosnia and Herzegovina. Türkiye was playing with house money and caught us. Congrats to them for beating the World Cup champs. That’s huge for them.

When Christian Pulisic checked into the game, I thought that surely he was going to cause a goal, and while he played well, we weren’t able to score a goal. It is unfortunate, but the US has to “be a goldfish” (Ted Lasso).

It was clear that this group is competitive, but maybe this will be a humbling experience that allows them to regroup and be stronger. “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”.

In the third quarter of the game, it felt like the US was grabbing the game, but after the hydration break, Türkiye was able to regroup. Congrats to them for beating our JV team.

I fully expect this team to bounce back and make it at a minimum to the quarter finals. I think it is realistic that they go further, but at least go that far.

I am excited for July 1st! Go USA!

The NBA Draft used to be an event with an element of mystery to it, but now it feels like that is all gone. Every team uses the same analytic formula to rate players, and it seems like we all know who everyone wants to take. I wasn’t surprised by a pick till pick nine in the draft, and even then, it made sense that new Mavericks Head Coach Dusty May wanted to select his guy in Morez Johnson Jr. The only surprise to me was that some of the dumber NBA franchises made smarter decisions.

The top four were set in stone before this draft, but still, ESPN tried to make it seem like anyone could’ve been selected. I don’t blame the people in the studio for attempting to create this angle, but it just wasn’t believable.

ESPN also seemed to steer away from anything that would’ve been controversial on their broadcast. I remember when ESPN used to do player comparisons that would compare some 18-year-old kid to Michael Jordan or Hakeem. These comparisons were dumb, but I’d be lying if they weren’t entertaining.

Once again, I don’t blame the talking heads for not wanting to look bad online, but on ESPN nowadays, isn’t that their whole motto?

The Stephen A’ification of sports media on ESPN is a real thing. First Take is a show designed to grab clicks and virality online. Stephen A serves as the reactor who is pissed off at someone saying the most “Blasphemous” statement of all time. While maybe this isn’t great for sports media as a whole, it grabs viewer retention every year. If the teams aren’t going to make bad picks anymore, I think ESPN needs to make some wrong statements.

In my social media feed this week, there were old clips of Bill Simmons on ESPN during the draft show. While he was a bit of a polarizing figure for his time, he was a lot more entertaining on the draft show than what I watched the last two days. I am not saying Bill Simmons needs to be on the draft show, but somebody who knows basketball and studied the draft needs to just be on the show and speak their true mind. No more watered-down takes.

The player and family interviews are a cool concept, but they are boring. Every college kid nowadays has an agent who has represented them for the past four years, and a college that has taught them media training. They are all way too media-trained to actually provide the viewer any sense of enjoyment. The ESPN broadcast of this year’s NBA draft was so boring that it was more entertaining to just watch the draft board and not the actual draft. The World Cup was going on, and that product deserved way more viewer retention than the draft.

I don’t blame ESPN for the fact that teams make good picks nowadays, but I do blame them for still having a boring show throughout that. I want them to provide me a mixture of wild takes, with then also some good, smart analysis of how the college player can translate to the team that just selected him. Don’t talk to the player after being drafted; let that be a social media clip or something else. Talk about how the player can fit into their new team’s system, and provide your honest take about what is going on in this draft. If you think that Darryn Peterson won’t make it in the NBA, I want to hear about it and why.

ESPN, I give you one year to figure out how to make a better product. Good luck.

Team USA took down Australia 2-0 in another dominant performance. This game was uglier than the last, but it showed that the US can win an ugly game. America didn’t have its star Christian Pulisic, but it didn’t seem to matter.

In the first half, the US was dominant and grabbed two goals. They never looked back after that, cleaning up all attacks Australia would attempt. This team is giving me hope.

It is now the first US team to clinch themselves into the knockout round after two games.

Flo Balogan’s speed wrecked Australia throughout the game. It was a clear strength that the US had.

Australia had chances, but the US was able to squash everything and grit out a win. This is why I am now even more excited for the future of this team.

Why not us?

This team feels different, and is different. I am excited for the knockout stage. I really do think that these Americans are about to make a whole lot more noise than the world is ready for. It is going to be hilarious when we make it farther than England. They will be so salty, and we will never shut up about it.

Why not us?

I am now thinking of the world where we win the Hockey gold and the World Cup. This would be a year that us American’s would never let anyone forget. We would be insufferable in the best way.

Why not us?

Team USA’s game against Turkey will likely not matter, and so I think the US would be smart to rest Pulisic for the majority of the game. Play him for maybe like 20-45 minutes so that he’s not rusty, but then get him ready for the important games ahead.

Why not us?

I will continue to cover Team USA and any other games that I watch and want to talk about this summer.

This World Cup has consumed both my Instagram and Twitter feeds this week, and I am obsessed. The first thing that got me roped into the World Cup was the opening day game in Mexico City. The Mexican crowd was so amazing, but what got me was the Mexican duck. The atmosphere was electric for game one of 104, and it hasn’t slowed down.

Well… ok… the Canada games haven’t had the same feel, but everyone else has brought it. Stupid Canada.

The USA game was obviously magical, but I have already touched up on that.

Then the world witnessed Cabo Verde beat 0-0 with Spain—a legendary victory-tie from the island nation that is smaller than Indianapolis. Cabo Verde goalkeeper Vozinha now has over 10 million Instagram followers because of his legendary performance. He deserves it. There’s no doubt that Spain was better than Cabo Verde, but they weren’t able to capitalize on it. That game ruled.

Another highlight of the tournament came with the goat. Lionel Messi had himself a hat trick against Algeria. Messi does indeed “still got it”.

I then, as a lifelong Messi truther, thoroughly enjoyed the Ronaldo collapse in game one. Cristiano Ronaldo just doesn’t have it anymore, but Portugal runs their offense as if he does. The game is played through him, but he can’t run it anymore. DR Congo was able to pull off the tie, even though Portugal grabbed an early game goal.

The thing that has really grabbed my full social media algorithm is fan bases. Scotland’s Boston takeover is hilarious. When they went to Fenway and then took over every Boston bar, it was truly amazing.

The Norway rowing the boats has been wildly entertaining. I specifically enjoyed it when they rowed it up the escalator, but in the stadium, it was amazing as well.

Well done, world!

The World Cup has gripped me by the balls, and it won’t let go. I find myself watching every random game, even if I don’t know a thing about the nations. I will continue to cover the US team in depth, but I will also comment on the rest of the world.

This tournament rules.

The Knicks are NBA Champions*.

How did we get here? With the best fourth-quarter performances in every game.

The Spurs will be great someday, but this year, they couldn’t finish in the clutch. The Spurs cannot get a bucket when they need it, which is why they failed. Victor Wembanyama needs to develop a signature move (probably some hook shot).

The Knicks were fighters all season. They managed to come back from every deficit in this series. Jalen Brunson was clutch and dominant in this series. Congrats to the Knicks for this championship*.

The role players had a rough showing as a whole for the Knicks in this game. Karl-Anthony Towns was terrible, fouling out with only two points in this game. Somehow, the Spurs weren’t able to capitalize on this opportunity. Brunson was amazing, but the rest of the team really struggled.

Congrats to Brunson. Well deserved*.

The Knicks really did it*.

This series was close in every game, and yet the Knicks won in five. The experience really showed. The Spurs will undoubtedly have their day, but today isn’t that.

Now… You might’ve noticed my interesting use of the asterisk in this article. That has a simple answer: There were no Pacers in this tournament. If Tyrese Haliburton doesn’t tear his Achilles, the Pacers win this championship. They are the Knicks killers after all.

And yes, of course, I had to do that. This championship sucks. It really sucks. The Pacers are so fun, and this sucks. Covering this series has been extremely difficult. I hate the Knicks with all of my heart, and I always will. While writing this, I am watching the championship ceremony, and I want to throw up.

I would also like to extend my congratulations to Adam Silver and the NBA Cup for correctly predicting the NBA Champions*.

Congrats to the Knicks for this championship*, but never forget, the Pacers are 30-24 against you in the playoffs all time.