Oh, don’t you just love the experience of getting up and heading to the mall? What compelled me to create this story was just the contemplation of noticing how others and myself included have spent more time ordering from sites online than actually going into the mall to enjoy that experience of shopping.

Of course, transportation can always be an issue which that had been a slight issue with me, but I can easily take the city transit to the mall or movies if I wanted too. Oh, snap I can actually go to the movies. Nice!

I got a little bit off guard but growing up my parents religiously took my brother and I too the shopping malls that were between an hour and 2 hours long depending on if we decided to go to the Jacksonville, NC mall vs the Wilmington, NC mall. Some of my favorite stores to shop at were Limited Too, Claires, The GAP, and Delias. I even liked grabbing some smell goods out of Bath and Body Works. Omg I can’t forget about Books a Million to grab my favorite magazines. My go too mall meal has always been Chik Fila when I was younger. Sometimes I would get Tony’s Pizza.

Once I got around the 3rd grade my mom would take me to get my hair done at the JC Penny Salon. Oh, how I just miss the peppermint shampoo and conditioner that was put on my hair. Such a cooling sensation.

I miss the mall culture of the 90s and early 2000s so much that I am watching this movie titled Chopping Mall directed by Jim Wynorski that came out in 1986. Just a quick synopsis about the movie, Chopping Mall follows a group of mall employees who stay after hours for a party, only to find themselves trapped when a lightning strike causes the high-tech security robots to turn into lethal killers. This fast-paced blend of 80s slasher tension and tongue-in-cheek sci-fi offers neon-lit visuals, practical effects, and campy humor. Initially a box office failure, it later gained cult status for its outrageous premise, quirky performances, and satirical jabs at consumer culture.

I am so excited to eat these gummy worms and to come up with some more ideas for some more mall study pieces. It feels good to be a part of a dead mall community of people who appreciate the culture and community of the mall.

I can literally see myself being a mall walker when I become a senior citizen.

What compelled me to write this piece was just thinking on the fact on so much that you can do with your smartphone. Let alone making phone calls and sending text messages we can literally write a word document on our phones if we chose to download google docs or word. For the record I literally just found out that my phone (I almost said small computer) allows me to download Microsoft Word from my Google Play store.

Don’t ask, okay? I just never thought about downloading Microsoft Word on my phone because the interface would be too small to read unlike doing it on an iPad or laptop.

Speaking of smartphones being computers I really don’t like how big some of these smart phones are it is like how do they fit in your pocket? I notice a lot of males use more of the bigger phones (hence their bigger hands) because females aren’t really allowed to have bigger pockets unless they are within dress pants. Weird flex right?

Then there is the whole phenomenon on how we talk on the phone and we don’t even need to look at the phone itself which is a whole nother topic for a later day if I decide to write about it. But really, I am trying to contemplate on all the things that I use my Samsung Z Flip 7E smart phone for:

-Phone & Video calls

-Sending text messages

-Editing Photos and short from content videos

-Screen recording (which I rarely do)

-Social media usage

- Checking my bank account and work schedule

-Jotting down information in my notes and monthly apps

-Listening to music (Oh how can I forget that one. Shoutouts to my Spotify playlists. Shameless plug)

I sense a visual mix coming soon :).

You should listen to this playlist to get yourself in the cyber mood by the way.

Now that I am thinking about it some people still don’t even have a computer in their household even though it is 2026. That still doesn’t mean anything though.

Do you use most of what I use phone my smart phone for in the same way?

More than likely that answer is yes unless you don’t have a computer.

Let’s connect via threads

Well, if you are on this website, you are aware of what Substack is even if you haven’t fully updated the aesthetic of your newsletter profile.

Nothing like having some comfort spots to write your articles at so you can feel in a more relaxed. Especially on a Sunday or weekend day for that case. That way you feel the whole vibe out. There have been a few places that I have written my Substack articles that I felt have helped my productive mode skyrocket continue reading below on why I chose these spots and how they made me feel:

1. Couch

   Just kick your feet back and relax with your laptop or tablet in your life and write. This has been one of my most relaxing places to write at but I would more so recommend having a timer to write whether that is on your writing device or phone that way you can take breaks or naps because the couch is an easy place to snooze at without even hitting the snooze button. I find myself putting on a good edutainment YouTube video while writing to get myself in the zone. I am not against putting on ambient music, but you might get distracted to point where you get up and start dancing.

2. The floor

   I would more so recommend a floor that has some kind of carpet on it for support because just sitting or lying on a hard wood floor might make your bosoms hurt. I think I spelled that word write even though y’all get what I mean. Similar to being on the coach just putting on a good video to lookout preferably 30 minutes that way you don’t have to worry about putting on an additional timer.

3. The Park

   I have rarely written at the park with my laptop or tablet, but it is more so easier to do so in the morning or evening when the sun is not at its peak to cause your electronic devices to get hot. At least you are outdoors in nature though the only distraction you may have is people walking by maybe trying to be nosey inquiring what you may be working on. Or a kid may accidently throw a ball in your direction and that can ruin your laptop or tablet.

4. Cafe

   Similar to writing at a park you are in a non-conventional place which is outside of the primase of your residence. Except for not being near nature unless you luck out and can scope out a cafe that is near a forest you can still deal with distractions with people coming in and out of the cafe. Very similar to a library normally cafes are a bit quieter than regular bars and clubs that play more louder music. Most people that come into the cafe are either grabbing a quick bite, catching up with a friend they haven’t seen in a while, working on homework, reading, or like how you are writing.

5. Bookstores

   Bookstores have the same gist as cafe’s however there may not be much comfortable seating area such as tables for your devices to stand on. At least the pro would be surrounded by books that you can use for research on your topic at hand

6. The library

   Very similar to a cafe but without the espresso (even though some libraries may sell Starbucks drinks in the vending machine which is a plus). Oh yeah, you won’t have to deal with a lot of noise because the environment of a library is supposed to be quiet anyways. At least you will get a desk of your choice as well in multiple places and you can check out books.

Out of all of the places that I have suggested for you to write your Substack article at I would have to say my most favorite place would be the library solei for the fact that I can conduct a lot of research in there. I would suggest either eating before you get there and/or bringing a light snack with you that won’t make a lot of noise because you really aren’t supposed to be eating especially near the library computers. My second option would be the living room on the couch which is where I have been used to writing my articles for the time being at my dad’s until I get a new desk.

Do any of these suggestions help you out to change your scenery for writing? Sometimes a change of scenery does help to keep your mind going.

Where do you mainly write your Substack posts at?

Let’s get cozy and discuss all of this below :)

Source:

Nothing is worse than that feeling when you see those three or four dots from someone with the word “typing” and they have nothing to say. That response just stops because they stopped speaking.

Like what does that even mean? Like did they intentionally want to say something and just didn’t know the right words to say that? I mean if they didn’t know the right way to say what they wanted to say they could have easily just said “I don’t have the words to describe this” OR they could just be plain out shy.

Now I am not the one to really talk however I was someone who was classified as growing up being shy and awkward. You can’t really tell much by how much I can run my mouth at times about any given topic (must be my Gemini moon since they are known for being great conversationalists) but even on my shyest day in grade school I still responded to people when they had a question. I just wasn’t the person to bring up a conversation because I figured only a select few people that I knew were interested in what I had to say.

Let alone this main topic at hand but it does weird me out how some people aren’t the best conversationalist in person or on the phone, yet they spend most of their spare time even while on the toilet scrolling and posting on social media. I will never understand it. I think most people are more so on the shy spectrum of things (which I myself can be as well depending on my mood) so that is why they feel more comfortable posting than actually talking.

Now the question relies on does this fully really matter because we can all just easily cut these inconvenient people off?

It does matter because what if these social media apps were to shut down, we all have no choice but to communicate in person like we got some sense.

According to a quick Bing search on the importance of communication lies in its ability to foster relationships, resolve conflicts, and enhance teamwork.

The key points on the importance of communication are as follows: Building relationships, conflict resolution, teamwork and collaboration, trust and honesty, and lastly personal growth.

Having good communication can foster trust and honesty between both parties which can trickle down to the improvement of all the other key points of communication. <3

This is just a short blog post as the weekend progresses.

I ended up being scheduled for both of my shifts at my job. I couldn’t make the first one because I had to call out from my stomach not feeling too well. The second job I wasn’t able to make it because it was hard to being able to get an uber at my location due to the time of the day that I was booking the Uber ride.

I think God wanted me to sit down because I been ripping and running around with both jobs for a hot minute. I hope something else is able to fall through so I can call this whole nightmare a quits. I been through a lot I feel (as much as anyone else) and I really feel as though I deserve the best that life has to offer for me.

How am I utilizing this day off? By sitting down and doing some researching. Also chewing gum has helped me to be able to calm my nerves.

I was able to focus on rebranding myself to as well during this day off on all of my social medias and interact on the Instagram microblogging service threads which I am starting to gain some kind of traction from with my wellness brand.

Sometimes talking on the phone with loved ones can help you gain some kind of clarity on your life and even help you slow down with your thoughts. It isn’t healthy for your mental to be isolated away from loved ones stuck in your head.

Mindfulness is really key especially during hard times. -@bychynna_

What is one mindful thing that you have done for yourself?

I don’t want to come off being woo woo weird, but I am feeling an intense energy with a splash of weird confusion. Leos what are you stressing so much or worried about? Is it a business plan or someone from your past?

Me personally I have finally felt like I got my mental stabilized, but I do however feel that something is still missing but I don’t necessarily know what that piece is though. Maybe the thought will come to me in the morning. Oh yeah, I have been unnecessarily stressing about the rebrand of my blog even though if you have been paying attention you may have noticed that I changed the name of my blog and my social media handles. I really feel I picked the right simple name for my blog that will some up all of the various things that I will be talking about. Especially knowing the fact that the people in my life know that I am a Leo. I pulled some naturally inspiration from Tyler the creator. There is only one creator and that is him, I mean God.

We got to learn to let these things go. I know I have been trying to at least.

Some ways that I have been able to cope are:

• 1. Reading

• 2. Connecting with loved ones

• 3. Going for a walk

• 4. Journaling or doodling

• 5. Listening to music

Those are just a few ways that I have been able to help distract myself. too much social media however doesn’t necessarily help especially if your algorithm isn’t perfectly catered to your likes.

I ended up pulling an affirmation card out of the deck that states “HOLD ONTO HOPE, even in the darkest season, light is already on its way.” So, mind boggling that my eye was on this card in the middle of the shuffled stack. SO how do we interpret this? I interpret this card message as they say, “see the light at the end of the tunnel”. It is pretty self-explanatory to me. Alot of us Leos are coming out of some dark periods even though we don’t want to display that side to the people that are closest to us because it is expected of us to always be the radiated sun at all times.

People closest to us have to remember that we are human too and we have feelings and go through inhumane things as well.

These tips of course can apply to any other sign especially if your sun is in the fire element, but this post was intentionally pulling from the sun sign of Leo.

If you are a Leo with Capricorn or some kind of earth element in your chart tap into that energy to help yourself, get grounded. The best way an earth sign distracts themselves is by staying busy.

<3

Quit telling me that you are attracted to me and all of this if you have no intention in trying to pursue me as being a part of your future. When I say future, you should know exactly what I mean unless you aren’t a real man. The words and the compliments don’t really mean anything to me. I mean I am flattered a bit, and I appreciate it a bit but at the same time where is the future of stability at? When are you going to do your due diligence as a man?

Oh wait, I get it. I am just here to pass time and your boredom. I am tired of giving out my number to men who aren’t putting it to good use. Talk about something dammit instead of the same lousy “wyd” text every 5 minutes. I can’t be the only person that is talking about something. That is boring to my senses. YOU come up with something to talk about my g. Talk to me as much as you talk to these bots on social media that don’t even respond back to your posts.

I am a lover not a fighter because nothing about me would fight for your lousy attention and games. I see no point in doing so. It is a waste of my time. It isn’t even a waste of your time since you play so many games. Just save not only me but other females heartache and just be a bachelor for the rest of your life. Love is built off commitment not foul plays. This is not a game. Try practicing with yourself since the word on the street is you really are gay since you fumbled the bag.

You aren’t as manly as your beard has grown. Why do you want your beard as long as my hair by the way? Are you secretly trying to compete with me with length? Do you wish you were me? Relationships really aren’t what they use to be in the 90’s. Men are just out here reaching out to anything these days saying anything. That is how I know they are lose canons. Can’t control their own fuse but you are “so lit” though.

-Chynna

So, a good while back I took it upon myself to pick up this Internet Detective series book titled Net Bandits and I was in for a more so comical treat inside while reading it. Let’s begin this book review by breaking it down into sections:

Cover: Me being a visual creative I would be lying if I didn’t say the cover didn’t get my attention. When does a color palette similar to primary not get one’s attention. Especially when it includes an orange gradient. Whoever came up with the color palette for the book series is a genius say the least because it goes great with the rest of the design swatch of the book. Looking at the character that is on the front cover who I am assuming is by the name of “Rob” seeming really focused on what seems to be a computer caught my attention to as well especially being someone that is always researching something on the computer herself. I think to myself I wonder what he was viewing currently at that moment on the computer on the front cover. Oh yeah, I wonder if anyone won a new computer that was featured on the bottom right-hand corner.

Inside Cover: The inside cover features the other books that are in the Internet Detectives book series such as Escape Key, Speed Surf, and Cyber Feud which all of those titles do sound very interesting to read however I think I will be switching gears by reading a book that a checked out from the library, Ellery Queen, and Alfred Hitchcock Mystery magazine series which is totally a bit off topic. Or is it? The second series Escape Key was only available at the time but not the other two books that were listed. Beginning with a quote at the top of the book listings “Enter a new dimension of mystery when you surf through” drawn me into wanting to know what other books from that series were out to read.

Letter from the Editor: There was no letter from the editor however that was a spoiler on the first page showcasing you pretty much what the book would be about. Here is that introduction below:

“Rob looked at the blank e-mail page. That was it! He might not be able to run for help- but then perhaps he didn’t need to.

Quickly he flicked on the caps lock key and began to type.

But no sooner had he started than he heard Elaine clattering back toward his room.

Rob’s mind as in a whirl. What was he going to do? the most he had time for was . . . yes, it could work.

Rob’s fingers hammered at the return key. Then, as he heard the scrape of the key turning in his door lock, he frantically typed some more characters.

Desperately he flicked the mouse onto the Send icon and clicked once.

He was just in time.

Plot: Moreso start the plot of the book only had a slight correlation to the title of the book. Mainly it was focused on how one should navigate a computer which I found to be pretty enjoyable and slightly comical. Especially seeing how they included computer screenshots throughout the book which was very creative say the least. Also, it was very comical how one of the characters (which I do not want to give too much away) but she didn’t like being told what to do. Which I found I could really relate to that character because I have been told that I am a bit stubborn myself.

Inside Back Cover: Looks like there is a computer contest inside.

Back Cover: The back cover was just as fun to look at like the front cover. Some SMS language was displayed to I believe show the intersection of technology and communication. It was only right that the book cover designer scaled down the image of the front cover and put it on the back cover to avoid technically repeating designs. It gives it a bit of a new flare. If you want to know more of what to expect of the book definitely take a look at the back cover if you can grab yourself a copy of it.

That is all for my first book review blog post! What book do you think I will review next?

You can check me out on:

IG: @chynnacafe_

Join my book community on Good Reads

It kind of dawned on me how many emails I have sitting in my Gmail queue that I have not taken the time to thoroughly reading. We aren’t counting what is in my spam folder by the way. I am talking about the emails that are hanging out in my inbox and promotionally tab that I actually remember subscribing too months to years back just because the website or brand looking aesthetically pleasing to my eye.

Well did I just answer my own headline question here or is it more of an underlining psychological reason behind this so-called madness of hitting that subscribe button?

There are at least 50 companies that have my email address if not more and I don’t know if I feel comfortable about that because:

1. I don’t know the level of credibility for these brands that I subscribe to. It doesn’t matter if a company has a website. What does its Privacy Policy state? Do they even have a Privacy Policy or an https:// address

2. Just because a company has an aesthetically pleasing Instagram page that doesn’t mean they are legit either. Aesthetically pleasing meaning pretty curated photos and what it seems to be professional well thought out captions to go with their posts.

3. There is a contact section, but it doesn’t mean you should contact it.

Plus, there are various other reasons I could list on why I don’t trust just handing out my email address to just any site, but this blog post would be longer than ever and turn into a conspiracy theory.

Some reputable brands that I feel comfortable giving my email address to are LL Bean, Sharper Image, The Weather Channel, Patagonia, The North Face, PBS just to name a few!

I am sure some of you are wondering well what steps you have proceeded to make to add some relief to your inbox. Well on Wednesdays I try to use that day to eliminate as much emails as possible out of my inbox. I haven’t been so good at the unsubscribing part though. I MAY have to set a separate day for that.

I think the really general gist of why I take it upon myself to hit subscribe is because I just get excited about the content that I see. I picture myself wearing some of the cool clothing the whole nine. I don’t know can’t a girl wish sometimes? When I say wish I really mean wish. There are so many things that I want to be able to purchase off some of these sites that I know for sure are LEGIT. Of course I will be posting these goodies on my blog site. You’re welcome. :)

I have some questions for you all:

-Are you subscribed to a lot of company emails?

-How often do you check your emails?

-What are some good brands that you all subscribe to?

Let’s discuss below.

Stayed tuned as I decipher in my next piece on how come social media can’t just be blogs and/or forums like the late 90s.

So, like any other girl that was born in the late 80s to mid 90s more than likely had the Britney Spears freshman album titled “Baby One More Time”. I had her album (I actually got for Christmas the year that it had come out) and the Oops! … I did it again album when that came out however I ended up selling them on Depop for about $15 two years ago. I know I am such an idiot for making that decision, but I felt like I got stripped of my girly innocence in my last relationship. Plus, I felt a bit desperate for some quick money back then when I ended up quitting a job

I blame my recent ex for all of that. That sounds like a hit single to be honest.

Was it really his fault that I don’t have the physical Britney Spears discography currently at the moment? Not really but I felt like if I was single, I wouldn’t have made that decision. I feel like I have to rebuy her body of work whenever I get the chance. Hopefully you will all won’t get too mad at me.

I at least made sure that I followed home girl on Spotify

Re-listening to her album brought me back a lot of memories of me playing this album in my room at my mother’s house.

I of course love her hit and well-known singles on the album such as …Baby One More Time and (You Drive Me) Crazy but one of my favorite unfamiliar songs on the album is The Beat Goes On. It just has a summer party kind of melody to it. I can see the video set playing out in my head as the song progresses. I can see a lot of it being shot kind of like the Rihanna wild thoughts song mainly taking place at night.

Also, the …Baby One More Time Davidson Ospina Radio Mix sounded pretty cool as well. I think of a lot of high fashion runway imagery showing when I hear that version of the hit single. Wait I take back some of that I actually like the Boy Wunder Radio mix better. No offense Davidson Ospina before you come at me

So, what do I rate the quality of this album. Obviously a 10/10. I am not talking about Britney’s artistry I am more so basing it off the quality of the sound. The only thing that saved it from not being a 9/10 is the mix versions of …Baby One More Time had some decent base in them. But I have to remember this was created in a studio in the early 90’s not during this current time period. Whew time has flown by really fast.

I listened to this album with my Sony headphones.

So, what album will I critique from my childhood next? Who knows.

in the meantime follow me via spotify @chynnasound :)

Anyone that knows me knows that I am a fan of not only learning about aesthetics and finding my signature aesthetic but actually the word aesthetic. Ever since I found out really about that term around 2017 it has pretty much been on and popping since then with me going in different directions of rebranding myself (I blame it on getting bored easily since I am a Gemini moon at heart).

About 3 weeks to a month ago on Tik Tok while I was in Frutiger aero land which if you are not aware of what that design style is just think 2000s Windows XP for a good visual representation. I ended up coming across the Frutiger Zen aesthetic and another aesthetic which I forgot the name of it off the top of my head but long story short it pretty much describes moms in the 2000s that would go hangout at Panera Bread. It is called the Tuscan woman (which you can insert the word mom/aunt in place of the word “woman” aesthetic).

Enjoy a good YouTube short explanation of the aesthetic created by your very own :)

Okay now going back to this Frutiger Zen aesthetic what is this whole design style about anyways?

Well, I look at this aesthetic pretty much being like a health movement as well because Zen routes from the act of getting in a calm state of mind while doing yoga. Yoga is a form of body movement. You catch my drift?

There are different components that make the Frutiger Zen aesthetic be what it is. I believe these are the components that create the whole Zen atmosphere no pun intended:

1. 1. Light Arial and Verdana fonts similar to classic iOS interfaces

2. 2. Baby color tones such as pink/lilacs, blue, white, and grey just to name a few (sometimes forest green thrown in there) mixed with earth elements (such as plants, lakes, spa/Zen landscapes)

3. 3. 250 - 400-megahertz songs (the classic Frutiger Zen song by the way is titled The Rivers of Belief by Enigma)

4. 4. late 90’s/early 2000’s yoga attire

5. 5. Pink Windows 2000 pop up boxes and white with silver iOS interface especially

6. 6. Drink Hot Tea or Arizona Green Tea (but we all know or at least should know that Arizona is just the vaporwave genre beverage in general now, isn’t it?)

Here is a Frutiger Zen vol.1 playlist I created on Spotify to help you get into that Zen like mood. Enjoy! <3

Doesn’t this aesthetics style of music remind you on Gen X Soft Club a little bit especially the song called 6 Underground on the Sneaker Pimps album.

Just a little spoiler alert I got a vol.2 coming soon! You’re welcome. :)

chynnaSOUND

In 2026 we are in the midst of a work shortage due to the rise of more jobs being open especially with this AI thing going on. Oh what the irony of that right. More jobs causing a work shortage.

An African American female and a Caucasian descent male discussed how being in the army opened up multiple opportunities such as a new home for the female and there were some opportunities that opened up for the male however he felt a bit overwhelmed to where he didn’t know what direction to turn to. He felt as though he didn’t have a sense of career direction.

I could honestly feel how he was a while back because dealing with mental health battles and not feeling like I have accomplished anything comparing myself to my peers let alone seeing people posting their perfect highlight moments such as flashing money and their homes on social media can cause one to feel as though they haven’t gotten anywhere in life.

It was a very short episode because it literally took as long as me painting my nails (which was a a great self care therapeutic experience say the least) but it would be great to see a documentary on this topic.

You can watch PBS live here.

What do you think about the work shortage epidemic? I also have another question for you as well which is would you like to see a documentary on this such topic? Let’s discuss this below :)

You can follow me via social media

Instagram: chynnacomm

Youtube: chynnacommunications

So how did this all happen you ask? Well long story short I was rushing to get ready in the morning and the remembrance of me not putting on deodorant didn’t pop up in my head until I went to work.

I didn’t smell at all because for one I bathed the night before and two I put on Marc Jacobs perfume before I left home. I just didn’t smell how I normally do because I am use to the mixture of my perfume with deodorant if that makes sense.

For any of you who are wondering what kind of deodorant I normally wear it smells kind of like pumpkin pie. I got it from Dollar Tree. They had the pumpkin spice scent but the town that I live in along with myself can agree that we not up for smelling like pumpkin spice.

I honestly think the pumpkin spice scent and/or flavor is getting a little bit out of hand.

I know this post was a little bit random but I had to get this thought off my chest.

Have any of you ever delt with an embarrassing or a life rushing moment. Please share with me your experience below. I would love to hear below.

I really think it is both. I know this morning as the day that I am writing this (August 9th) the morning felt like fall. It definitely had that feeling of wanting to put on your sweater or jacket. I need to get more some new sweaters and jackets by the way.

From seeing all these summerween social media posts and seeing all the Halloween decor in my job Autumn can’t get here any faster.

Just like this post on tik tok. I never knew I could find a post that I could relate to so deeply.

@iamnotshaneofficialI’m over the sun I’m ready for Halloween #halloween #fyp #aesthetic #fall #wednesdayaddams

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Oh yeah let’s not forget about Pinterest where if your search Halloween in the search bar you will find various pins of different Halloween photos of ideas and captured moments.

So, what are my favorite things about Halloween and autumn you ask?

• When the leaves change colors. I am a sucker for red, orange, and yellow leaves. Very pretty

• Pumpkin and vanilla scented stuff such as perfume, candles, and even drinks. We are all aware of the Pumpkin spiced latte I am not a 100% fan of it, but I am sure it would taste good with some whipped cream with cinnamon on top

• Halloween and fall decorations. Growing up I was so used in seeing houses decorated with Halloween and fall stuff. Some of the decorations were on the scary end haha.

• Halloween themed movies and tv shows. Nothing like sitting back watching a good marathon.

• Candy corns especially the autumn mix.

• Cool mornings and nights. The afternoons are decent temperatures too. Anything is better than 90-degree weather that feels like 100 degrees

• Wearing sweaters and turtlenecks

Do you like the autumn season or the Halloween holiday in general? If so, what do you like about it the most?

Nothing against people who are married and got kids. I am not even against befriending people who are married and/or got kids.

Marriage is something that can be a long-term goal for me when the time aligns so it would be nice to befriend people who are already in that stage of their life. It is just most people who have kids, well their life is very highly invested in being around their kids especially if they don’t have someone that can watch after them when you decide to want to get up. The chances of them wanting to make plans with you is slim to none.

Living in a retirement small town can be a deal breaker to as well because the majority age demographic is people who are way older than me which the odds of me having something in common with them is slim to none.

As a disclaimer I am not against befriending someone who is older than me because of course you may never know what all that you have in common. It is just the odds of that working out is very slim to none.

I guess maybe I should just put myself out there more in certain environments like cafes or even strike conversations with people at my place(s) of employment because you never know what can spark after a conversation.

I don’t know I kind of miss living in the city area (western part of the state) because there was more variety of people to meet especially around my age bracket.

However, I will take advantage of living on the coast for now and embracing more of the calmer vibes that I may not necessarily get in the city. But then again you can live in the city and get calm vibes it just depends on the different environments that you are in.

If you are in your 30s, do you have a problem with making friends? If not, what do you do to get to that place of satisfaction of creating a social circle?

People often find themselves in some uncomfortable situations due to miscommunication or no communication with another person. It’s literally just actions up in the air with no motive behind them. Relationships whether they are platonic or not and when I say platonic, I mean you know how those work crush situations people talk about end up. They end up hooking up and regretting it because it makes it awkward in the workplace or it does somehow end up working out and they both have to leave the job for their own sanity. Or let’s just say in general the other person tries to make the other person does things to try to make the other person anxious on purpose. Like for what reason? lol.

Is it an ego tactic to where that person doing all the “trying to make the other person anxious” really is into the other person but doesn’t want or is afraid to openly admit it?

I don’t know but these types of situations people go through can be a little entertaining non the least because it’s like where is going to head at. In high pleasure or embarrassment? Sometimes it can end up in both ways to be completely honest which can be confusing say the least.

So, the question relies on what do you do when you are in these types of situations? Do you confront the person? Do you just let it be? Which the second option might be the best because if the person playing these mind games had enough courage, they would confront the person about how they are really feeling instead of being quiet about it.

I am a firm believer that sometimes people do certain things to have some type of control over you. That or they could be uncontrollably nervous. Either way with miscommunication you will never know how they feel because they won’t speak up.

When I say don’t ever let nobody watch you fold, I mean don’t let anyone have you acting jittery or needy. Or even better don’t let anyone have you looking desperate. Always hold yourself to a high standard not a point where you are coming off as being stuck up, but people have to work for you. People have to prove that they are interested in you. Not play mind games.

Grab yourself a cup of java or tea as we deep dive into one of my favorite aesthetics that will remind of you of being in a cafe in the 90s or early 2000s.

As I have been searching on the internet for different designs that match the vibe that I am on currently in my early 30s (being someone that was born in the early 90s) I need a vibe that can give me some inspiration to match my ideal decor for my future apartment and how I would like to dress.

This is it.

I first found out about this aesthetic while on CARI’s website which for any of you who don’t know CARI stands for the Consumer Aesthetics Research Institute where a group of people search through the web to define different design aesthetics that came out during a certain time periods and the create boards with images to help add the visual component to the design name.

Once I seen about the Global Village Coffee House aesthetic I instantly fell in love, and I couldn’t help myself but to dive deep on Pinterest by creating my own boards for inspiration.

You can follow me on Pinterest by the way at https://www.pinterest.com/cafechynna/_profile/(*shameless plug)

So back to the aesthetic talk. Certain cafes and stores such as Panera Bread, Barnes and Noble, Starbucks and Pizza Hut hold this aesthetic really help. Some of these cafes and stores design aesthetic still looks similar to how it did in the early 2000s. How cool is that?

I honestly think a lot of these restaurants should go back to this design style because it gave off a warm cozy feeling while sitting in there.

Here are some cool images that I found on Pinterest of the Global Village Coffee Aesthetic

A compilation of the aesthetic

A few good playlists that will remind you of the aesthetic

I hope you all enjoyed this post as I did write it. Do you like this aesthetic? Does this aesthetic remind you of the 90s and early 2000s in a cafe.

So, what made me come across this topic was reflecting on the different living situations that I have been in. Those living situations whether it was in college, a significant other, or with family.

Adapting is something that I have had to learn to deal with. Every different living situation there is a routine that goes along with it. Like for instance when I went off to college, I had a certain routine of going to classes mainly in the morning and then the evening time was spent on either working on classwork, getting up with college friends, or the mall lol (don’t worry I didn’t go to the mall too much. Or did I?)

Living with at the time boyfriend there was a routine of going to work and then using the evening to workout, cook, and wind down. Saturdays were for cleaning and Sundays I used for self-care like washing my hair, shaving, doing my nails that kind of thing.

Now that I am back with my parents (at my dad’s house) I have a slight routine of going to work and some days when I work mid-day or evening, I go to the library in the morning and then go to work. If I work in the morning I try to make it a habit to work out or do yoga once I get off after I eat dinner.

It kind of makes me contemplate on the fact that we create our own reality with doing all of this because every living situation you have the free will to do whatever you want to do. Time is an illusion. The illusion is time.

Are you aware that each situation that you are going through that you are living a different lifestyle?

Do you have any special routines or daily rituals that you follow?

Or even better are you good with time management? I’d love to hear about it below.

No. I guess it just means that my circle got smaller. But that isn’t a bad thing though.

Sometimes the people who you thought would be there for you won’t be.

When I first went off to college back in 2009, I had so many friends or so-called friends I shall say. Nothing against them but most of them weren’t all what they seemed to be. No hard feelings though. Unless some magical reunion happens, I don’t think there will be a reunitement if that is even a real word.

Friends come and go because you aren’t related to then, but family is always there as they say because you are kin, so it makes sense for me to only hear from family more than so called friends. It doesn’t even matter how long it has been family you would think seems to always come through more than friends. Well, they should at least I mean you are related for peaks sake.

I really don’t know what else to say because I have just been rambling for the most part.

Oh yeah, Loyalty.

Let’s define the word loyalty.

According to Merriam’s Websters loyalty is defined as the quality or instance of being loyal. Some synonyms of the word loyalty are allegiance, commitment, and dedication just to name a few.

& I wonder do any of y’all’s friends or family check up on you to see how you are doing? If so, that is a good thing because having loyal people in your corner is something hard to come by.

Be grateful. Or be thankful I shall say.

And if you answered this question as not then don’t feel bad it doesn’t mean that you aren’t important it is just people make time for who they want to make time for. Even though that is a tough pill to swallow. You have to be conscious of who you call your loved ones.

That is all.

I think a lot of it stems from not having a consistent travel schedule with having to rely on my dad for rides because I try to implement spending time with my mom and my brother since I don’t live with them.

Where I use to live at my sleep schedule was more ideal which I am striving to somewhat get back to. I would go to bed around 9:30 and wakeup at 6:45. I might have to let myself naturally wakeup I don’t know. Nothing like having an alarm though. A peaceful alarm.

I really don’t know what to fully do but it is lowkey bothering me and things probably won’t go back to semi normal until I am living on my own. At least I am still young and got time to get it together.

The only thing I can really do is just remember baby steps. I know I will get this together.

It seems as though I am mentally awake around 15 minutes before my alarm clock goes off. I’ve looked up videos on tik tok that stated that it is normal to wake up a little earlier than your alarm clock goes off especially if you are under stress.

You can view the video here that covers a lot of what I am talking about: https://www.tiktok.com/@deepdlve/photo/7460083763179965742

I am not sure if this all could partially be a symptom of BPD depressive disorder because I use to be someone who would wake up with the sun and get that extra sunlight. Not saying I am intentionally depressed it is just some things in my life I am not 100% happy with that I know will change in due time. I think my main thing too is that I am ready to move out of my dad’s house and being out on my own plus not having a consistent sleep schedule due to travel.

I ended up asking a friend his sleeping habits and he said since he has been out of work his sleep schedule has been irregular and it is a good thing to not so much rely on an alarm clock. So, I am going to try to have more of a set wind down time and ideal wakeup time.

Major prayers that this works out for me.