Just got home after a week in New York and I think this might have been my favorite trip yet?!

I LOVE being in New York for our pop-ups and getting to meet so many of our beautiful customers IRL. Although I must say, high summer in New York is... hot. It was also my first time there without Iris, which meant that when I wasn’t working I actually got to explore and, dare I say it, enjoy... myself?!

We launched our first-ever collab with , I ran to Prospect Park, ate an unreasonable amount of fro-yo and sushi, discovered I like kiwi now, spent some much-needed time alone, and got to hang out with some of my favorite people.

So, from Sandy Liang to foot massages, here’s why I loved this trip:

• We launched our first-ever collab and had the most fun night (which you can read more about on Sandy’s stack). I get kind of nervy about events and am especially aversive to being in-front of the camera. But with Sandy it was soooo much fun. The event at the store just felt like a party with friends. It was so exciting to launch the collab, we worked so long on it. And just as much as it was such a true pleasure to work with Sandy and see her creative process (she’s truly so inspiring), working together over the last year I now feel lucky to call her a friend. Our Days of The Week pack sold out so fast, I literally had to drop everything and run to the store to buy myself and my cousin a set! But you can still grab some of the last few pieces, We made the cutest pajamas for cozy self-care nights at home made from 100% Organic Cotton.

  Break up with those synthetic PJ’s already <3

  

• I can’t tell you yet because I don’t want to jinx it, but we have something very very very exciting in the works for the New York Cou Cou girls! Eeeeep!

• I’m quite literally obsessed with fro-yo and foot massages. Preferably, together. I know “the spot” is Mimi’s but, although I love fro-yo, I don’t have the patience to wait in line. SO here’s the move if you’re downtown: Madison Fare, if the line is short, or Culture on W 8th Street then on that same block stroll over with your froyo to All Seasons Body Work and ENJOY.

• Prospect Park?! One morning, I ran there from my hotel in the city and then sat by the big lake and did a meditation. It was my first time going, and it’s my new favorite park.

• Emily Dawn Long. Have been admiring Emily’s brand for a long time from a distance after NY native Nicole from the Cou Cou team told me about her. I made an appointment at her showroom, I wanted everything and had the best experience. It felt like dress up time. Left wearing one of Jeff’s Shirts feeling 1000% cooler walking out than I did walking in. So, highly recommend making an appointment at her showroom if you get the chance.

• It was just nice to have time alone. I’ve written about time alone before since being a mom about how I have really noticed and deeply felt the need for me to have time alone — without the noise of the outside world, without being constantly involved in people, I find it a lot easier to hear what’s truly going on inside.

• Having gone to NYU (Gallatin girl!) and the last few years of spending a decent amount of time there now with Cou Cou, I’ve made a handful of dear friends in New York. It’s so hard to make friends as an adult, let alone as an introvert, let alone as a mom with a two year old. But I feel so lucky to now have a few friends that I really cherish the time I get to spend with them while there. Early dinner at Altro Paradiso or for yummy, but not outrageously spenny sushi, Sushi Katsuei (I went to their East Village location, but the original is in Brooklyn).

• My current read is Kitchen Confidential by Anthony Bourdain, which was so fun to read during solo-dinners in New York. I’m not a cook. When my boyfriend is away I literally live off Sardines on toast and weetabix. So, I didn’t think Kitchen Confidential would be for me. But alongside a handful of helpful tips (e.g. goodbye moules frites!), it’s inspiring to immerse myself in his philosophy of just good old pure pleasure and adventure.

• As obsessed as I am with froyo and foot massages, I am with maybe more obsessed sushi. I also tried Rosella in the East Village, which is nice for solo-dining (as per Bourdain’s tip, I went on a Tuesday — the best day to order fish, apparently… and NEVER MONDAY). Always hit Sugarfish and Kazu-Nori. And hit Sushi Katsuei three nights on the run. So good.

  

• Still haven’t found a yoga studio or teacher I connect with in London, so when I’m in New York, I love going to Sky Ting.

• Our September playlist (listen here) accompanied me the whole time. Running across Williamsburg bridge to “Dancing with Myself” by The Donnas and “God is a DJ” is a vibe hard to beat.

• Discovered a new-found love for kiwi. If there was a fruit plate, once upon a time, I would leave the kiwi and melon girl. But in the last week, I’ve come to believe kiwi is a very superior and important fruit. Preferably paired with pineapple.

• I hit my fav stores including Desert Vintage and of course, Sandy Liang. I also have a handful of places I go for design research every trip which is always fun.

  

• Enjoyed movie nights at the hotel with a cup of chamomile watching the Raffa documentary on Netflix. I don’t really watch TV, but I love sports documentaries. During the world cup I just kind of screamed when everyone else did. I don’t care much for sports, but there’s so much to learn from athletes in terms of mindset, discipline and the sacrifice and commitment required to be excellent (however you define that, whatever you want to be excellent at) and the practice of becoming the best version of yourself. Others I’ve loved are: Free Solo, The Last Dance and Senna. Next on my watch-list is Lorena. (Let me know any recs in the comments!)

• Megan from my team came with me, who has literally been working with me on Cou Cou since it was just us in my apartment (almost five years ago now!!). We had lots of lols and are truly so excited about what we’re working on for the New York Cou Cou girls. So yeah, I love what I do but just as much love who I get to do it with.

• All that being said, excited to be home with my best friend and whole heart, Iris!!

Love,

Rose

xxxx

Over here at Cou Cou, we’re not listening to anyone that’s telling us summer is over. It’s still August, after all. Some of us (myself included!) are about to head off on our summer holidays, and then of course there’s various trips planned over the coming months. But perhaps most importantly, the spirit of summer — that energy, curiosity and openness to new adventures — is something that we carry with us year round.

Whether you’re looking for some last minute holiday inspiration or sorting out your packing list for upcoming travels, we’ve got you covered. Our team are here to share where they’re traveling this summer, what they love most about it, and what they’re packing in their carry-on… Cou Cou’s, duh! And a good book <3

Tascha

Traveling to… an off-beat Greek island near Kos, and for an English heatwave mini break to Dorset.

What are you most excited about doing in Greece?

I literally go to Greece every year because I have developed an insatiable desire to swim in clear blue waters. This year did not disappoint! We rented a quad bike and explored lots of remote beaches. It’s my favorite way to explore and escape from the busier town beaches. I ate plenty of greek salads, chicken souvlaki and tzatziki as always, and one of my reads was a book that has long been on my list but I’ve never got around to — Just Kids by Patti Smith, and I LOVED it.

What did you pack for your trip?

I wore the The Cami Slip and The Long Cami in cherry red and black on rotation, The Voile Pant to travel in and The Babydoll to throw over a bikini. The Short in pink pointelle to sleep in, as well as my favorite pointelle undies for evenings — I love pretty white underwear against a fresh tan. In Dorset, I absolutely loved wearing the new The Jardin Midi (and matching French Blossom undies) — it felt SO English summer and perfect for the quaint summer setting.

Aditi

Traveling to… Jaipur, India.

What do you love about it?

Jaipur as a city itself is just so magical — the streets, the food, the art, the fashion and the people <33 I’ve been so many times but something about the city just draws me back. I was super excited to stay at the Johri which was a dream of mine for so long. It has the most beautiful rooms and the most amazing staff who we ended up becoming friends with at the end of our stay.

What were you most excited to see and do?

I had a visceral reaction when I visited the Jawahar Kala Kendra, an arts and culture center designed by Charles Correa. It’s now a place for people to host plays, exhibitions and for local art to flourish. We met two old men at the cafe who explained that it was designed to represent the various phases of the moon and an appreciation for the solar system and overall universe. And on our last day we ended up going to a nearby village called Bagru, where we could see artisans making clothes and the village itself is known for its block-printing. I ended up buying so many unique pieces that I will cherish forever.

What were your Cou Cou non-negotiables?

The Pantaloon!! I ended up gifting one to my friend who I went on the trip with and we both LIVED in it — the perfect bottoms for humid Jaipur. Also The Slip Dress, it’s the perfect cotton voile material really allows my skin to breathe, and The Slip Skirt, which is such a staple in my wardrobe.

Maria

Traveling to… Marseille

What are you most looking forward to on your trip?

Sudoku, no laptop, eating fish, sleepovers with the girls, playlists, braiding hair, aperol by the pool and SPF

What are you packing in your carry-on?

The Voile Pant in a size large for the most comfy and relaxed fit. The Tanga to stick out of my pants while going out. The Boyshort for the beach. The Midi Slip in pointelle to sleep in and The Muse Tank to protect my cleavage from burning.

Nicole

Traveling to… Sicily & Filicudi

What are you most excited about doing there?

I’ve been to Sicily once before, almost two years ago now, and absolutely fell in love with it. Italy, generally, is one of my favorite places to visit — how could you not love the pasta, the Aperol & the laidback energy. Sicily is an even more chilled version of that, with such an interesting history. I’m excited to explore the Trapani area a bit more, go on beach hikes, start a new book and forget what day it is, to catch the ferry to Filicudi, for long late dinners and fresh seafood, playing cards while the sun is setting, and meeting up with friends.

What are your summer holiday essentials?

I’m packing The Voile Pant & The Tank for traveling, but also for throwing on after a day at the beach into drinks / dinner. Maybe The Rina to pair with The Boyshort? And The Midi Slip in black & The Voile Bra in white to poke out the top for going out.

Shelby

Traveling to… Tanzania & Zanzibar

What are you planning to do there?

Our itinerary is climbing Kilimanjaro, followed by a safari and finishing with a beach escape in Zanzibar. We’re planning to spend two weeks surrounded by some of mother nature’s finest work, which feels like the ultimate summer adventure and allows me to switch off, be present and trade the city skyline for mountains, wildlife, and the ocean.

What are you packing for your trip?

My pointelle undies, the only undies I wear. The Pant and The Tank in cotton jersey is my go-to long haul flight outfit, comfy and effortless. And my holiday essential is The Boxer, it’s a perfect day to night piece. I love throwing them on over a bikini or styling them with a cute kitten heel for dinner!

Madeleine

Traveling to… Cornwall and Greece. I guess the craving was for old seaside villages, seafood and rocky beaches, with cold beer.

What did you love about your summer holidays?

I love to be in places with historical importance, that feel older than any of us. Ultimately, to be able to turn off and experience life differently, to slow down and pay attention, is the dream. I also finished the fourth and final Elena Ferrante book from the series, I somehow only routinely read during the summer. Reading stories and watching films about the places I’m in is obsession of mine too.

What were your Cou Cou non-negotiables?

Cotton Voile everything: The Voile Bra in Toile de Jouy and matching undies (so everyone can see under my sheer slips), The Iris Slip in French Blossom, Fleur tops and The Voile Pant, my summer uniform

Carmen

Traveling to… I went to Thailand

What did you love most about your trip?

We did loads of hiking, swimming and eating, but my favorite night of the trip had to be one evening when we went dancing ~~~ one hour turned into five, and my cheeks hurt from laughing :)

What did you end up packing, and wearing?

I wore The Mini Skirt every single day, and The Tank in black. Also The Slip Dress was beautiful for nice dinners.

Katya

Traveling to… Bulgaria, Northern Greece & Istanbul

What did you love about your summer holidays?

Going home, with a touch of the unknown. I brought dear friends to my childhood house in Sofia, sharing a little bit more of me. Long dinners, street wanders, up mountains, along vineyards, ending the summer at my childhood friend’s home by the sea and my Baba’s apartment. And then, the adventurous — a sleeper train to Istanbul, a winding journey through Northern Greece. From Istanbul’s markets and ferries, to the monasteries of Meteora, the heat of Thessaloniki and the beaches of Plaka. Traveling light, traveling far, a little rugged, always local, rewarded by blue waters, a lot of love and deep friendships.

What are your summer holiday essentials?

The Tank paired with linen trousers and The Slip Skirt. For the summer heat — The Mini Skirt, in the city or on the beach, and The Voile Bra under every top. I also love The Cardigan and The Raglan, for chillier evenings.

Let’s just get into it. What does ‘out of order’ mean to you?

It’s kind of funny, out of order was actually the name of a magazine I used to work at. One of my early early fashion jobs, but out of order outside of that realm means when your brain is just in a tizzy. When I feel over stimulated, that is out of order. When someone’s asking you a question and you’re just, like, glitching. You don’t know what to say. Your room’s a mess.

Yeah, for me, it’s about paying tribute to this idea of life’s messiness and how it’s a non-linear journey in life, and mental health. I like the idea of celebrating it instead of just pushing it to the side — celebrating the messiness that one needs to go through in order to find content and joy. Were there moments in your life when you had to go through particular things, or a piece of advice that helped you find peace in those glitchy moments?

For sure. I used to live in LA, and then I moved to New York. I was working at Conde Nast, and I took the job because my mentor at the time was like maybe you can take this job and then work in fashion proper. That isn’t what happened. I moved to New York. I got laid off, and it actually wasn’t even working in fashion, I was working in digital marketing or something. I remember crying in One World Trade. I was like, ‘Oh, my God, this is the end of me.’ But then I remembered that my first day of work, I told myself in the taxi, if this doesn’t work out – you’re in New York now, you have to just try to be a stylist. Mind you, this is my first day of work, and I’m already looking at Plan B. I stopped crying and I emailed the studio manager of my favorite stylist, Patti Wilson. I knew of her work because my dad used to get GQ and it was a joint subscription with W. Patti used to do all the covers. And I remember googling Patti, because I kept seeing her name in the credits, and I was like, ‘Oh my gosh, she’s Black.’ I was like, wait, Black people can do this job? I think at the time, I just thought fashion was very white. I cold emailed, and went for an interview. I feel like if I wasn’t laid off, I don’t know if I would have actually tried to pursue my dream of being a stylist. I don’t know if I would have taken that chance, taken that risk.

We’re told that things have to work in this very straightforward way, and maybe in the back of your mind subconsciously, you knew that you were destined for something bigger, or something that felt more joyful, more connected to what you actually wanted to do. Maybe Plan B was always Plan A. Not knowing that Patti Wilson was a Black woman, and not knowing that there was necessarily a place for you within fashion, what has that journey been like? What do you love most now about being a woman, but most importantly a Black woman? How has that changed over the years?

When I first started assisting, there were a lot of times where I’m the only Black person on set. I’m sure it still happens, obviously, it definitely still happens, but now I have less instances where I’m the only Black person or person of color on set. Even when it was that way, I didn’t feel uncomfortable because Black people are minority in America. I also went to a predominantly white college, so I don’t feel weird when I’m the only Black person in a room. Even when I was assisting, it was very clear that fashion is a tight-knit industry, and there was this idea that certain people couldn’t do certain jobs. Then BLM happened, more people of color started getting hired and that was amazing. This is also when I stopped assisting, and [started] working for myself full time. Now we’re in this Trump era. I make this joke, like, the whites are back.

Also the men.

Oh, the men. They are riled up.

I saw the funniest fucking meme the other day about ballet flats, and this girl was like, ‘Can we not have anything? Can we not have ballet flats?’ I love Harry Styles, but ballet flats?

We can’t.

We’ve known each other for a while, but have recently become better friends. And I’m just so inspired by the way that you show up in the world, the way you style yourself, and this confidence. I’m not sure if this is something that you’ve always felt or something that you’ve grown into, but you really exude a power, and it’s an energy that is imperative that I’m around in my 30s. Like, I want to be around women like yourself. I want to be around Black women like yourself. Do you think that style is a way that you have been able to express this idea of being out of order, and doing things your own way? How is that translated into the way you wear clothes?

I’ve always been an individual. I hate uniforms. I don’t want to look like anyone else. I mean, I will wear things that other people own, but to be head-to-toe in an outfit that someone else has… One, I like to be an individual. Two, I’m Nigerian. Nigerians love to, I won’t say show off, but we’re into the glam. And it’s not about, we have the same glam. It’s like, my glam is my glam. Your glam is your glam, but it’s gonna be fab. And I see clothing as a protection. I feel like if I look my best, then I can kind of block haters, or also gain friends. I used to get teased a lot in elementary school, and then I got really into going vintage shopping and coming up with outfits to wear to school, just because I love clothes. In middle school, I realized that people would compliment me on my clothes. And obviously, as you get older, you develop a sense of style. People are going to talk to me. They’re not going to bully me about being dark skinned or whatever. I think that clocked in me. So it was always better for me to be myself and look like myself, because that is my protection. I can’t really change the color of my skin, right? But I can choose if I want to wear this outfit that I think is cute. I always loved clothes, and I just felt like it was this fantasy world that I could just get lost in.

Now, being a stylist and being able to style other people, I get a lot of joy from it because I also transform them. I get excited when people feel like they look great. And I get excited when I get a new piece of clothing. So I think it’s very much ingrained in me to be myself. Because of the way I dress, I’m used to people staring at me because I don’t look like other people. I stand out, but it’s not because I want to stand out. This is literally how I feel comfortable. I like to look a certain way for my own wellbeing. It’s not about other people. I just like clothes, I like to explore and play with them. If I don’t like what I’m wearing, I’m probably just going to change.

It’s a state of being, isn’t it? Someone pointed out that I always used to wear see-through dresses, but they were like, ‘You don’t really dress like that in your everyday life.’ I’m a popcorn hoe. I like to switch between these two personalities, and it’s not for anyone but myself.

I totally agree. I very much dress for personalities. Sometimes I watch a movie, I’m like, ‘Oh, I love this.’ In Blue Jasmine, Kate Blanchett, she’s just like this woman on the fritz. I love a woman on the fritz.

I love an unhinged woman.

I’m kind of unhinged. Sometimes I want to be Monica Bellucci or you know, an Italian Principessa. Sometimes I want to be trade. I’m wearing my baggy pants and a hoodie.

I don’t know why I want to look like I’ve just kind of escaped from the mental asylum, but that’s what I want. I hate anything that’s too on the nose. I think some of the best style queens, we’ve made mistakes. There’s trial and error, but I have no regrets. I feel this now a mother, I go to the park and I sometimes get looks because I’m dressed in a way that doesn’t feel like I have children. I was in an audition the other day, and they were like, ‘You don’t look like a mother.’ What does that mean? Why must we blend in because we now have children, because we work in a certain workplace, or because we already attract enough attention for being a Black woman? I don’t give a fuck, this is who I am – do you know what I mean?

It’s always been who I am. I haven’t changed. I’m going to my college reunion next month, and it’s funny, I’m thinking about what I used to wear in college. I went to a wasp-y ass school, and I used to walk around like Lady Gaga. No pants. I’d wear triple tights and a leopard print coat. Jeffrey Campbells. I was into pink lipstick. I was like, ‘Becky, you’re crazy.’ These people are wearing L.L. Bean, full Ralph Lauren. But I had friends. People accepted me. I didn’t feel outcasted and that’s really cool that I was able to be in environments where, even though I dressed differently from everyone, people didn’t take me as the enemy. Because how I dress is not necessarily a reflection of who I am as a person. Sometimes it’s just like, this is how I’m dressed today.

Is there any advice that you have for anyone who’s searching for themselves, who’s still examining the things that might make themselves who they are?

My advice, it’s kind of what I tell myself – focus on the positive and don’t dwell on the negative. That’s very basic, but last year I was having a hard time and this woman was like, ‘You should watch The Secret.’ I was like, I’m not gonna watch that but then I did. I won’t say out loud that I’m a big believer in manifestation, but when I think about positive things that I want and write them down, you start kind of asking the world for it. Sometimes it appears. So I try to give the most energy to positive things that are happening, because when you stay in a mindset of negativity, it just kind of just snowballs. There’s no reason for me to be so focused on something I didn’t get, because it’s not mine. What’s meant for you, is meant for you.

I’m such an admirer of everything that you do with the band, you immediately came to mind in terms of people I wanted to interview. What comes to mind when you think of ‘out of order’?

The way that my brain was working this morning, I had put on the shirt and then I felt like I was doing a lot of clumsy things. I have a brain that’s very out of order and it feels like a colossal undertaking to get it to focus in the way that I want it to, to get it to pay attention in the way I want it to, the way I want it to be kind to myself.

Totally. Was there a time in your life where you had to go through a moment of out of orderedness?

Definitely. When I was 15, I was diagnosed with a rare form of cancer that showed up in my face. I was extremely lucky because at the time that I was diagnosed, there’d only been like 300 cases of it and the only things that they had learned was that it didn’t respond at all to chemotherapy or radiation. That is a gift in and of itself because cancer is not always the thing that makes you sick. It’s the treatment. To be 15 and to have that fear in me so early on, to feel this separation from my peers and feelings. Already as a teenager you’re battling with those feelings of not feeling understood, feeling like life is presenting you a very rigid definition of what a person is. I felt like at this really pivotal point in my life, that life script for me was ripped up. It took years for me to just appreciate surviving, to appreciate being alive. It makes me sad for younger me when I think about the depression that followed that period, it was like I started waking up and my first thought was, ‘I hate my life’ and feeling frozenness and fear in your body when there were so many other things I could look to, to celebrate, but I didn’t feel that in my life.

I mean, you were just so young to be handed this idea of life and death. Did you feel that to a certain extent, your youth or this moment of space where one starts questioning one’s identity was taken away from you?

I talk a lot about the way movies represent a young girl with cancer versus the reality that I had. She’s always terminally ill, she’s always going to die, and she’s a virgin who hopes she has a crush before she dies. She only exists as character development for the male in the movie. When I was young and this happened to me, I already was interested in drinking, doing drugs and being a bad kid. But the weekend after I found out I had cancer, I smoked my first cigarette. I was like I’m gonna drink, I’m going to party, I’m going to try drugs, because that was how I experienced life. Living my life wasn’t going to school and studying for my SATs, that couldn’t possibly be the thing. It made me want to be in a rock band and be creative, feel like I had control over the things that I would want in my life. At that age, there’s this misconception that all the bad stuff makes you feel the most alive?

I was very much like that. There was a rebellion. It didn’t look like that at that age, because I didn’t necessarily have the language to deconstruct what it meant to go against the grain, but as I’ve grown up and been able to look at those years in my life that felt completely out of order and messy. There’s sometimes a sadness to those things, the things that one has to go through to figure out a semblance of self.

When that timeline gets sped up for you, then those later 20s, 30s, can feel much more serene than for other people. A lot of the chaos, a lot of those feelings of being out of order happened so quick and was so condensed in this very scary period of life, that you’re like, ‘Now I got to survive that.’

When was the last time you felt like you had one of those messy moments like this morning, where you nearly spilled tea over your new t-shirt?

I had a moment last month, where I was just having a stretch of days where I was feeling really unable to focus. I was having so much trouble doing the things that I knew I had to do, but my brain was not allowing me to and it was impossible for me to stay on a routine.

Once I started tracking my period, I started being so much kinder to myself. That moment, that week, where I am feeling more sensitive and emotional, I’m more easily to cry or something is gonna hurt me… I’ve spent [years] beating myself up for not being able to stay on this system that ultimately was created for all of us by men who have a completely different hormonal system than we do, and trying to live my life attuned to how capitalism wants our internal nature to be. Of course, I’m going kind of wild in my head every month, because that’s a capitalistic trope of what production or what productivity looks like – that’s not going to be the same for me every week. That’s not going to be the same for you. It’s not going to be the same for anyone, whether or not you menstruate. Every week is different, and you have to honor that.

You’re so right, it’s deemed as such a failure. I think that’s both because of what we’re all living through, but also this pressure on us. I’ve seen it becoming a mother, and I’ve found myself apologizing for taking time to be a mother, having to re-establish myself in a way that felt like I hadn’t given up on life and what it meant to be a working person. And I was like, ‘What the fuck is going on?’ Why am I giving myself over to this ideal that only destroys and shames us? It’s exhausting. It’s a dance that one has to play in order to fight traditions and ways of thinking, and disrupt them. That shows up for us in all different ways, but when do you first remember rejecting patriarchal constraints that had been placed upon you?

I was so lucky to grow up with a mom who was also an investigative reporter. I was incredibly privileged to grow up in a household with two parents who loved each other, loved me and my sister, and wanted to create the stable, loving environment that they didn’t get to grow up in. And I grew up with two parents who loved to talk with each other. They were always talking about the world around them, about capitalism, greed and the two party system. I was encouraged to rebel against what I was told was true. I remember they always were like, just because you’re learning something in school doesn’t mean it’s the entire truth. They were very ready to question what was going on in the world and why the world was this way. Even though they were making it work for them, there was this feeling that things could be better overall and a new system could exist. Seeing a fearless woman like my mom, I was like ‘Okay, well, I could be a fucking bitch too’ and I mean that in a complimentary way. I don’t have to accept the things that men are telling me about myself, and what’s so beautiful about existing now and getting to see this younger generation come up, is I’m seeing so many women who are defining for themselves what that is and what that gets to look like in a world where, historically, that definition has been written by men.

My mom’s a powerhouse, so I definitely understood that I was going to do things differently because I saw her do things differently. That was something that came quite naturally, but I think it’s always at the forefront of my mind because of my career and the fact that I’m in quite a toxic environment a lot of the time just because of fashion, and bodies. I have other elements in my life where I get to portray a person that’s not necessarily the one that I have to be in fashion.

I think it’s fine and beautiful to be contradictions as well. The idea that we’re hypocritical for doing both these things at once doesn’t allow for us to be actually multifaceted and complex, where all those things exist at the same time. Because I’ve also had people who are like, ‘Oh, you care about politics, but you put on nice dresses to play shows’ — as though these things can’t exist together. It’s a very tired way to try to minimize women who have something to say, by trying to eat away at that.

I love what you said about being a ‘fucking bitch’, but you reclaimed it as positive. I want to talk briefly about this idea of the monster. It’s a notion that Angela Carter coined about a free woman in an unfree society, and this idea of the monster being a re-examination of rage, and all the ugly things being a positive. To be blunt, frank and unapologetic is actually to be free within a system that wants you to not be those things. Watching your performances is the epitome of that: to reclaim this idea of what it means to be a woman. We are soft and gentle, but we’re also fucking angry and upfront, and there’s an honor to all those things. The primal scream that you bring the audience through, I get so emotional watching your music. I feel like if I’d had someone like yourself at that point in my life, how much easier things would have been. I would have had a language like you said, fighting against a system that had been passed on to her. These things obviously take time, but to watch you up there, you just feel so free. Is that how you feel on stage?

I do think that the rage comes from ancestral lines. I feel like I was born angry. I think a lot about privilege and the way that I’ve been able to live my life, and I think about the women that I came from. There’s a lot of stories of them being put into mental hospitals for having too many emotions, for feeling. There’s a story on my dad’s side about my Grandma being institutionalized because she became so depressed being a wife and mother; she felt like there was more for her beyond those roles. This would have been the 50s or 60s, where the doctor was like, ‘She’s bored’. Her anger is coming from boredom because she wants more for herself. Go, let her go get a job outside the house. So, she started working at the DMV. But the first step was put her in a mental institution?

This idea of rage, especially for women, there’s this societal instruction that we are supposed to be ashamed of that rage, and we are supposed to find ways to hide the rage, to make ourselves more palatable to other people. But if we are given the space to diagnose where that rage comes from, I do think it’s built up from the women that came before. And then we open our eyes in the world that we’re living, and we see a world that is run by a malignant narcissist, a white supremacist — the greed of these men who are running the world and trying to make it in the vision of the world that they think it should be, versus how I think so many of us feel. Like why do we still have colonialism? Why do we still have these systems of white supremacy all throughout the world? Why do we have these systems that are so old in a modern world, that we know should not be there?

I think the anger is the realization that the world is not exactly aligned with [what] we could work towards — that there is a better way, and that we don’t just have to accept all this. Of course, if they can make us feel like we’re the crazy ones for being angry, then that’s a perfect way to anesthetize people and make them cut off from their emotions. The last thing they want is people who are in touch with their rage and know where it’s coming from, and then know what to do about it.

Totally, you put it so perfectly. There’s so much power in the lived experience and the similarities between all of us and one another, what that looks like, how that energy manifests when we get together and discuss like our ancestors did around the fucking campfires. To scream together, to share our experiences. How has listening to other women’s lived experiences shaped your understanding of your own challenges and identity?

I feel as though the audience that we have at this point – the attention, the stages, the opportunities I’m given — are a privilege to be able to be in those spaces, and be invited into them. If I used those moments or that microphone to only focus on the micro world of myself, it would be a disservice to the reality. I’m only standing there because so many people outside of me have gravitated towards our music and found meaning in it, and I know that we are reflections of each other, and I can see how intelligent, thoughtful, emotional and desiring of change this audience is because they’re reflections of the people on stage. When I look into the audience, I really do see a lot of young women who remind me so much of myself at that age. Art can be selfish in these ways, because you’re looking at your internal world. But if I didn’t think about the world and the emotions that we’re all inhabiting, it would feel like a lost opportunity to speak to something greater. Because ultimately, this is this experience that I’m having. This lifetime is not just about me. It’s about the role that I play within a community of people who want to see things change, and if you can inspire other people to start taking their rage and not be ashamed of it, and learn what that means to transform it into something else, into not allowing it to sit in you. Because that’s what I really get so concerned about, is like young people who are angry but are pretending like they’re not.

I see the way that everyone is grappling for the attention of young people in these really insidious ways, like the Steve Bannon’s and of the world and the Cambridge Analytica’s of the world. There are these forces just waiting in the wings to push ideologies that are meant to make us suffer internally, make us suffer alone and feel like everyone around us is the problem, or our competition, or whatever. Because again, that’s what capitalism wants: me to see all my other artists, my peers, as competition, as standing in my way, instead of a community that we’re all a part of. If we can get people to stop thinking about competition and more of community, that’s what I think art is supposed to be for.

As part of our mental health awareness project with Adwoa Aboah, in support of Gurls Talk, Adwoa conducted a series of intimate conversations on the messiness of life, feeling ‘out of order’ and the lived experience of women. Here, she sits down with artist Taiba Akhuetie.

I have a lot of respect for what you do. We’re new friends, and you’ve come into my life at a wonderful time. I had this moment where I was like, I really need to put energy into these new female friendships, so I’m really happy that you were able to do this interview to celebrate mental health awareness. Do you want to introduce yourself a little bit?

Yes, my name is Taiba Akhuetie. I am based in London. I’m an artist. My medium is hair. We are in my studio, there’s stuff made out of hair here. Yeah, that’s who I am.

You’re wearing the t-shirt. Everyone that I chose for the interview component of this collaboration with Gurls Talk and Cou Cou stood for everything that I was trying to put across with the t-shirt. You’re so vulnerable in regards to the way in which you talk about your life, but the other side of ‘out of order’ is this woman who goes against the grain and you do that beautifully with your work, your art, and just the way you navigate the world in itself. Were there times in your life where you felt that things were out of order?

That’s probably an ongoing thing. I struggle with things being out of order because, naturally, the way in which I work is often based on what I want to do, and sometimes when you take the leap to do something that is a bit more obscure... having trust in other people sometimes makes you feel like you’re a bit hectic and out of order because you can’t really have control over your journey. You feel like you don’t have control because you’re choosing to take a path that people doubt. I’ve approached brands in the past, and it feels like they really care about what I do, but then actually, what they want from me is to mold me into something that I’m not. It has taken a long time for me to have control over the things that I want to do and having to prove myself, even though I can show what effect I have with my work. It can sometimes feel that people don’t really believe that and it makes you feel like everything’s out of order. It’s something that I probably will have to deal with for a long time, but that’s a challenge that I’m willing to take.

This is also an ongoing process, but where did that self-belief start in terms of trusting your gut and your instinct, but also to take risks? How did you find it in yourself to do things your own way and go against what society might view as art, or being a woman, or doing things a particular way?

I started my journey as a hair stylist, but I was always very DIY. I wasn’t classically trained, so everything that I did was very artsy. It wasn’t like, a blow dry. It was doing hair stencils or putting loads of gems on someone’s head. It was quite out there. When lockdown happened and I couldn’t do people’s hair, I was like I still need to be able to do this, but how can I do it without doing it on people’s heads? So I started looking around my house and I had bags of hair, old pieces of furniture, and I started making sculptures. I had this moment where I was like, ‘Wow, I can actually just do this.’ When I started putting it out there, I felt some sort of validation that what I was doing, however weird it felt in the moment, actually made a lot of sense. I continued doing it, and over the years I’ve developed and refined it. I do think the art world it’s tricky, because art is subjective. People can question whether it’s art or not, but I have that belief in myself because of how it’s been received and appreciated by people that I wouldn’t expect to appreciate it so early on in my journey. That was the pivotal moment in my art career.

I suppose with age, one gets more confident. When do you feel like you went against that way of thinking?

Do you know what’s really interesting? I feel like I’ve always kind of been like that.

Really? That’s so cool.

Yeah, from a very early age. Even getting a full time job, I’ve only had one full time job in my life. It’s not to say that working for somebody else is not right, but I never felt like working for somebody else was good enough for me. I always felt like I was born to do something for myself. I studied film [at uni], and I worked at a production company. I quit and started working at Matches assisting a stylist because I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. It was when I was assisting this stylist that I felt I was really in control of how I did things. Then I started a pop-up hair brand with my friend, but then I went solo with it. I do think I’ve always had this urge to do stuff on my own. Having Nigerian parents, it’s hard to know whether they will be accepting of that, because all my siblings, they had full time jobs. They had security. And there’s me, working a part-time job and doing other stuff, being broke and them being like, ‘When is this going to work?’ But I’ve always trusted that whatever I’m going to do, I’m going to do it for myself and not for anyone else. Not to say that what I do isn’t for anybody else, because I do think it has value to other people. I just mean that I’ve always been a bit of an entrepreneur.

When did your parents get down with that? Did they just have to?

They had to because, unfortunately, I won’t listen to what they say. Obviously, they had concerns but they’re really supporting parents. I’m lucky. However much I would be like, ‘Can I have some money, please?’ Because I’m literally not making any of it. They always saw something in me, and they trusted that I would figure it out.

Are you the youngest? How many siblings do you have?

From my dad’s first marriage, he had three kids. Then from my mum and dad, there’s four of us. Then from my mum, there’s one. So that’s eight of us in total. I am the third youngest, but I’m basically the one that acts like the younger one.

So, by the time it got to you they were like, ‘You know what, we’re just gonna have to let her do her own thing.’ What do you love most about being a woman?

I love that we are naturally nurturing and that we have had to fight for what we want, because it makes us stronger. And that we really look after each other. I do think women really tend to look after each other a lot more.

What do you not love about being a woman?

I mean, being a Black woman is tricky and hard because you’re clearly treated differently, whether people like to admit it or not. You’re expected to take a lot more. You’re expected to act calmer in situations. I could be stood next to my friend, and my friend could be being rude to somebody and I could not be, but then I’d be the one to feel the brunt of it because I’m seen as different. How people perceive you as a Black woman is really hard. I have to think so much more before I speak or react to certain situations, because people will weaponize it.

It’s a dance. Obviously, it’s different between being mixed and there’s that – there’s different levels. But you have to be so aware before you open your mouth. There are already expectations and a perception on how you should be, or how they view you to be. I see it at work all the time. Sometimes I’ll walk into shops, and the way in which I’m treated in shops is so different when my hair is in braids or maybe it’s pulled or straightened. There’s been times where I’ve been told that I’ve stolen something or people have been a bit fearful. It’s ridiculous.

It is. It’s really interesting because I’ve grown to love myself more, but like you said with the braids, I would always be worried that people would find me less attractive or see me in a certain light because I had braids. I used to always have weave because I’d be worried about how people looked at me. Now I’m like, ‘No, fuck you.’ Like, why should I be seen as different because I have a style that is inherent to my culture? Why is that? Why are you scared of me now that I’ve got braids, but if I put a weave on or put a wig on, you know…

Obviously, braids have become a trendy thing now, out of our own culture. When it was on us it wasn’t deemed this beautiful thing, but when it’s palatable it’s fine. When I had braids, there was nothing I wanted more than to have straight hair for a bit because that’s all I saw around, and that’s all anyone told me. That was an attractive way to wear your hair. It’s also what you said before about how we as women look after each other, and our incredible way of listening, when we’re not up against each other. Our lived experience and our understanding of one’s own experiences can shape us and shape the community. How has listening to other Black women’s lived experiences shaped your understanding of your own identity and challenges?

There’s a weird thing where you have a 360 moment, you feel really seen at moments in your life. I grew up in a white, middle class area. My parents were from Nigeria. They didn’t have a lot of money, but I was thrown into that and finding people who have had the same experience or similar experiences because they are Black women – that level of understanding makes you feel so seen, and then brings you a lot more confidence that you didn’t have before. It’s so important to have that so you don’t feel alone in it.

Yeah, totally. Can you share a piece of advice for someone navigating a lack of self-belief or disconnection?

It’s important to take a moment to think about why you are doubting yourself, and then move past that because that doubt is actually going to push you further. If you’re always just feeling like everything that you do is great, then actually you might not develop. Having those moments of self-doubt, if you can push through that, then you’re always going to get through the other end. So don’t think because you’re doubting yourself means that you’re doing something wrong. It’s just a moment of making sure that you actually are in the right headspace to push through it, because when you do achieve the thing that you thought you were going to achieve, you’ll look back at that and be like, ‘Oh my god, I’m so glad that I pushed through that.’ So I think ultimately, it’s just about not being afraid to push through it.

I think young people right now, they’re fed this idea that life has to be linear and perfect. You’re watching young entrepreneurs suddenly become millionaires overnight, and you’re watching people become influencers, and they are on private jets and they eat fucking nice dinners all the time. It’s this reality that isn’t real. What I wanted to convey with this t-shirt was to celebrate the messiness, the doubt that one has to go through in order to achieve growth within their lives and to find a deeper meaning of themselves. There’s grief, there’s anger, there’s pain, there’s heartbreak, but all those things only brought me to understanding who I am, the people that I want to be around, the connections that I want to build, and the way in which I want to be portrayed within my career and world. You know?

Yeah, I agree. I also think self-doubt comes through when you’re comparing yourself to other people. Whether you’re conscious of it or not, it often is a comparison to what other people’s journeys are, [but] you have to try your best not to because everyone’s journeys are different. Sometimes it seems like smooth sailing, but we don’t truly know what people go through to get to that point.

Today I’m going to talk about stripes. French ones, specifically. Daniel Cleaver, oyster shacks and nostalgic summers spent on Île de Ré.

Many summers since I was a child, I have spent on a little island on the Atlantic coast called Île de Ré. The island is so flat and slow that somehow the days seem to move at the pace of its primary mode of transport: a bicycle. Think morning markets and little shuttered villages. Days spent cycling through the salt marshes, from town to town, morning market to oyster shack. Mornings nibbling on baguettes, butter and fresh apricots.

I went back last year for the first time — with Iris and some friends — when suddenly, one morning at the market, I realized I didn’t get the memo. Literally 80% of the locals were wearing navy Breton stripes, including my scouse bestie and even Iris, who was dressed in a cute, little vintage Petit Bateau striped tee.

A very short history lesson (I promise): In 1858, the French Navy made the marinière the official uniform of its sailors in Brittany. The original knit apparently had 21 stripes (one for each of Napoleon’s victories, so the legend goes), and the pattern was practical before it was ever pretty: A man overboard in stripes was far easier to spot in the waves. Then along came Coco Chanel. Then Bardot. Then Jane Birkin. I guess they wanted a piece of those spicy sailors on the Normandy coast, and made it their uniform.

Somewhere along the way, the Breton stripe stopped belonging to the Navy and started belonging to summer.

As with everything we make at Cou Cou, our pieces arise from a need (or in this case, a mild social emergency) of my own. And in that moment, stood at the marché I made the steadfast resolve that for Summer 2026… “I WILL NOT STICK OUT LIKE A SORE THUMB, NON-STRIPED-WEIRDO-BRIT LIKE DANIEL CLEAVER. I WILL NOT TAKE THE RISK OF GOING OVERBOARD.”

“Siri, play Overboard by JB”

So we made French stripes and reimagined them à la Cou Cou. A bit more petite. A bit less chunky. A modern marinière.

I’m about to leave for the island in August, so thought I would share a little guide to Île de Ré. A few beaches, oyster shacks and spots I have been going to since a little girl.

ROSE’S GUIDE TO UNE PETITE SEMAINE SUR L’ÎLE DE RÉ

Where to stay:

• An Airbnb - ideally one with shutters and a bicycle situation. No need to go grand, you’ll be out most the time anyway :)

• L’Hôtel de Toiras - if you wanna do all that

Eat:

• Les Huîtres de Trousse Chemise - my fav oyster shack right by the beach, enjoy with a glass of wine

• La Cabane du Feneau - more oysters in the marshes, feet practically in the water

• Le Bistrot du Marin - for “grand-mères” cooking

• La Baleine Bleue - fresh fish

• Le Balaou - for when you want to feel like a local who knows things

• La Bazenne - lunch that turns into afternoon

• La Maison - for dindins

• La Martinière - their famous ice cream spot

Out & About:

• Salty hair, air-dried. Cycle to Plage de Trousse Chemise or Plage des Gollandières.

• In the Summer Île de Ré has a market in each of its ten villages. And each one has its own vibe. On a weekend just cycle around and pop by them all. It’s more fun to stumble across them.

• Have a potter through the little shuttered villages, the vineyards, the salt marshes

• Read on the beach, lots.

• At night, cozy up and watch a French New Wave classic: La Piscine, or Une Femme Est Une Femme (Anna Karina is the ultimate muse).

Where are you from?

I am from Napoli, Italy.

When do you feel your most free?

When I am in the sea or when I’m training.

Happiness is…

Having something to wake up for.

What thoughts currently occupy your mind?

Training for nationals and my current crush. When I have to train a lot, I try to just direct my thoughts towards not very complex and potentially self-sabotaging directions, I keep it basic (as much as I can).

Something I love about myself is…

I am extremely disciplined.

What does discipline mean to you?

Discipline is waking up everyday and working on being the best version of myself — no excuses. To maintain your body calm when your head is not responding and to keep your head calm when you feel like you’re losing your body. To tell yourself you’ve been strong before and you’re going to be strong again. To see the bigger picture, to know that progress isn’t a straight line, to learn to fuck up with dignity. These past few months I really tested my love for archery. I have been practicing when I was broken, when I was injured, right after a mental break down. I simply put my head down and did it.

What’s a struggle you have to overcome?

Mental health. People who don’t struggle with mental health have no idea of what it means to. I am able to do unimaginable things, I have done unimaginable things, but then one day my mind just says no, not today… I tried reminding myself I am made of water and when water is trapped, water will find a new path. I am the only one that can see that path.

What have you learned that helps?

To ask for help and actually accept help from other people whom have proven to deserve my trust. That has been a major major major achievement for me.

READ

What’s a piece of writing that’s impacted you?

Actually not a book, but an interview with author, Toni Morrison in 1987 by Don Swaim where she talks about anger.

How did you come across that piece?

It probably found me when I was ready to receive it.

How did it shift your perspective?

I have struggled and I still do, dealing with anger management and I guess I have believed in the past that being angry and passionate was the same thing, I have only recently realized that anger came from fear.

WATCH

Three films that have shifted my perspective are…

Medea by Pier Paolo Pasolini (1969); Operazione San Gennaro by Dino Risi (1966); Hands Over the City by Francesco Rosi (1963)

My feel good movie is…

The Hunger Games.

LISTEN

What are some of your favorite albums?

One Foot Out by Nines; Per Averti by Gigi Finizio; TamAli Maak by Amr Diab

Do you listen to any podcasts you’d recommend?

Small doses by Amelia Seales!

Sagg Napoli is a multidisciplinary artist and archer from Naples, Italy. This interview was originally published in March 2024, as Volume 5 of Cou Cou Talks.

There’s a reason why we gravitate towards vintage. For me, it’s often the material quality – something made of raw silk, or soft cotton poplin – and that lived-in feel that just comes naturally from products beloved by both people and time. Vintage has character, it has history, stories of your mum’s first date held between stitches.

When we set out designing our Fleur collection, inspired by vintage underpinnings and your nana’s favorite slips, this was top of our minds. Everything that we make at Cou Cou is deeply intentional and while it’s important that every piece feels special… we wanted these styles – The Fleur Top, The Fleur Slip & The Fleur Mini (coming soon) – to feel super special. They are an ode to conscious craftsmanship and precious heirlooms, made with the hope that they might one day be passed down to your friends and daughters, and they feature a rare and delicate 19th century French lace called Leaver’s lace.

It’s a 200-year-old tradition. Crafted on antique machines from the 1800s, still lovingly operated by hand on the coast of France, Leaver’s lace has a rich history. Believe it or not, something so beautiful – Leaver’s lace as we’ve come to know it now – was actually born out of a time of war between England and France. Though the first looms were developed at the beginning of the 19th century in the UK, then improved by John Leavers in Nottingham, riots in the midlands and Napoleon’s closure of the English Channel, forced local artisans to smuggle the looms into France in 1816 to keep up their business. In 1837, the Jacquard system further improved the looms, making it possible to decorate the tulle with motifs to look identical to handmade bobbin lace.

This is still in practice today. The machines in our factory have literally not moved since 1855, and each web of lace requires eight highly-skilled artisans from threading to finished product. They are often siblings, folks who’s father’s or grandfather’s have operated the same looms lovingly by hand. Forty years ago, there would have been nearly 40,000 people making the delicate lace, but now our factory estimates only 100. Leaver’s lace is so rare and the practice preserved by only a handful of ateliers today, and so it’s really a dying art.

Since our Fleur pieces took us nearly two years to develop, in part because Leaver’s lace is far more labor intensive than artificial laces made in China or elsewhere (the go-to for fast fashion labels, but never Cou Cou) we wanted to tell you a bit more about our process and what makes Leaver’s lace so special.

We hope that you’ll appreciate the art of lace, and these future heirlooms as much as we do <3

I write this on the Eurostar from Paris to London. This trip to Paris originally came to be through an opportunity for Cou Cou to shoot a woman I have long admired. It went more beautifully than I could have imagined and I can’t wait for you all to see. But what started as a quick in-and-out for the shoot and a couple of days of meetings turned into time I didn’t realize how much I needed.

My daughter/love of my life/best friend/favorite girl in the whole wide world — Iris — was born almost two years ago, on the 12th of July. Cosmically, this was also the night my dear Nana (best friend/refuge/favourite person in the whole of heaven) passed away, only two hours after Iris was born. Since that day and after only one month of “maternity leave” (unfortunately the reality of post-partum, as a founder and business owner, is… and do pardon my French, but… quite shit), I literally haven’t stopped.

I love what I do deeply. I have such a sense of mission and purpose and responsibility and my daughter Iris is an actual angel. In fact, I often think Nana must have had a word with her as Iris came down to earth and Nana went up to heaven: “Now listen little Iris! Don’t you be giving our Rose a hard time!!”

In many ways I feel so lucky and blessed, but in other ways “having nothing to complain about” in some respects, I feel, got mixed up with dismissing the truth of my inner experience and dismissing my needs as a really sensitive person. I felt: I’m so lucky to do what I do, and Iris is so easy. “Things could be worse.” This resulted in me just powering through, which don’t get me wrong, at times, is all one can and must do. But always being in a rush, always this ever-present sense of “too much to do, not enough time” is no fun at all. If I was working, I had to be as productive and as quick as possible to get back to Iris on time. If I was with Iris, I was often counting the hours until she went to sleep so I could finish the work I hadn’t. If I worked out or GOD FORBID hung out with a friend without Iris, my mind felt in debt to my work or my daughter. Always in a rush to be anywhere but where I was.

I never thought I would nurse my daughter for two years. When people saw I was still nursing Iris at almost two, there would be looks of shocked amusement. “Oh wooooooow!” They would say. “Well, I mean well done! Go you!” Not going to lie, I felt judged. And not going to lie, I probably judged too before it was me: “Isn’t that toddler like… too old to be breastfeeding now?”

Breastfeeding all this time also meant I had never been away from Iris for more than one night. At some point though, after a collection of reactions (mainly from women without children or mothers who hadn’t breastfed) I decided: “Right! Enough is enough!” I thought this trip would be a great opportunity to leave Iris at home for these 4 night with her dad in London, to stop breastfeeding, and “finally call it a day!”

Up until this trip, Iris had come everywhere with me: Japan, New York many a time, Los Angeles, Paris, Biarritz. My hotel in New York has seen her at each stage of her growth from literal newborn to toddler. And each time we go back we’re both met with an endearing, “Oh my God, she’s got so big!” So what started as my first solo work trip, somehow also metamorphosed into a weaning weekend. OPTIMIZING!!

There were reasons I stopped. I wanted my body back (whatever that means). I haven’t had my period in almost three years since I was pregnant, which as a woman, just doesn’t feel right. There were reasons. But only when I got here to Paris, did I realize that the night before I left to come here — that last feed before I put my darling Iris to sleep on Thursday night — would be my last feed with her.

My eyes fill with tears as I write this, because it was really those times breastfeeding Iris that I just got to stop. I had to stop and just be with her. I didn’t have a choice but to stop working, rushing, trying to be everywhere for her, everywhere for everyone. I had to stop my laundry, my cooking, laying out my clothes for the next day, answering that last email. It was her way of making me stop, to be with her, undistracted and unrushed.

For so long I felt her demands were “annoying,” but when I imagine her soft little eyes looking up at me while I nursed her, I realise all she wanted was my undistracted attention and loving presence. Perhaps it is the hormones that dip when you stop feeding… but part of me wonders how much of my choice to stop nursing her was worrying what others thought of me, and the mistaken belief that her demands were interfering with “what I had to do”. When really, the most important thing for any daughter is to feel the loving presence of her mother.

I had an abrupt moment last night; “what have I done?” I thought. I gently squeezed myself to check incase there was any milk left, in case I could reverse it and go back and have at least one last feed with my darling. But there was nothing.

But perhaps my milk has dried up. Perhaps that Thursday night was our last feed — and as I realised last night, it very much might have been. If so, it reminds me deeply of two other moments from this last year: the closing of SoulCycle Portobello (an unexpected safe space), and a close friend who passed without me getting to say goodbye.

SoulCycle Portobello became a refuge for me. I got to have fun, take 45 minutes to myself. I. LOVED. SoulCycle. And it was so close to my flat. After getting back from our New York Pop-Up only a couple of weeks ago, I was so excited to do my favorite weekend class. I went on my phone right away to book bike 6 (yes, I’m one of those front-row-ers), only to find out SoulCycle Portobello had… permanently… closed. I literally couldn’t believe it. “Without a goodbye? Not even a last ride?” What the fuck!

Another reality check was when my dear friend Priscilla died. She was also my neighbor. We became very close in her years living in my building. She was in her mid-seventies, me in my late twenties. An unlikely duo — though I have always gravitated towards older, wiser women. During Iris’s first year, Priscilla often invited me to come for tea and to meditate together. Since the passing of my Nana, her presence gave me great comfort. Her home was also a refuge to rest and meditate, which was very much appreciated since my flat was no longer exactly meditation-friendly now that I had a baby. I have been meditating since I was nineteen, and to do it with a friend made it so much easier to somewhat sustain despite the demands of new motherhood. She was ill, I knew that. But then one day, without getting to say goodbye, she passed. Life doesn’t work on our clock.

Anything can happen at any time. We so often live in a delusion of certainty, as if we can control time and the world around us. When in reality, the last time we do something, the last time we go somewhere or the last time we see someone — it is unlikely that it will be known to us as the last time. Living with this awareness I think, would make us all live through our days a bit more present, a bit more grateful perhaps. At least I would.

We are pulling into St Pancras now. I feel I could write forever, but to conclude my thoughts: Despite the grief and the doubts around stopping breastfeeding, this weekend also deeply connected me with myself again.

I have remembered just how important is it to take the time and space — “a room of one’s own” as you will — to reflect and listen to one’s inner life. At least for me, peace and quiet is essential. My boyfriend says I am the “worst introvert in the world,” but really, as a sensitive person who feels things deeply, time alone is so important. And this time, I mostly spent reading and writing. And to have that spare time, without the anticipation of Iris waking up or without the ever present thought “should I be with her instead?” was just what I needed.

Upon reflection, I see what my time breastfeeding Iris gave me: both a practice of loving presence and permission to stop. As I head into this new chapter, I’m excited to find new ways to give that loving presence to both myself and to her.

Until next time. Hope you’re all having a lovely summer.

Bisous,

Rose x

P.S. I thought it might be nice to also share my annotation shorthands with you all — a practice and way of reading I have used for years. I find it deepens my ability to retain what I read and to carry a book’s wisdom, stories, and learnings with me through life. I’ve attached below a photo from the back of War and Peace which I am currently reading (an easy, light summer read!). I hope it may be of use to some of you. Maria Popova inspired this practice but I then made up my own shorthand’s as you will I am sure.

• R - I relate

• T - when something feels true

• I - interesting

• BL - beautiful language

• WW - words of wisdom

• <3 - just makes me feel, a feeling. don’t know what

• NC - new character (for fiction helpful)

• (Circle word) W - words I want to absorb into my vocabulary

I like thinking of my books as a diary: I annotate with these shorthands, write in the margins, underline and circle what resonates and what I want to carry with me. It is then fun to reread these books years later and see what still resonates, or what new things you discover. I recommend using a different pen each time you reread. It is fun to look back on. I also recommend re-writing your shorthand’s at the back of each book you read. At least I like to — incase I forget what they mean when I am older or incase I lose it one day and a stranger who chooses to read it might enjoy the additional context.

NAME: Madeleine

FROM: Texas

LOVES: Cotton, ballet flats, freckled summer skin, men’s clothes.

HATES: Nicknames, being late.

MOTTO: You will never have to force something that’s meant to be.

CURRENTLY READING: I’m usually in between 2 to 3 books at any given time. Right now, I’m reading the final book of Elena Ferrante’s Neapolitan Quartet, My Brilliant Friend and Haruki Murakami’s Norwegian Wood.

CURRENTLY INSPIRED BY: My friendships, particularly that I love appreciating their growth and change and deepening over time. There’s nothing better than growing up with your friends.

FAVORITE COU COU’S: The Thong in white pointelle to match my white pointelle Midi Slip.

TRAVEL DIARY

I TRAVELLED TO... Spain and France

WHY SPAIN AND FRANCE?
I’ve been going every summer and it feels so special to have a place to return to again and again.

FAVORITE PLACE I VISITED: San Sebastian, one of my favorite cities. It’s nestled perfectly between the sea and mountains.

I’M GRATEFUL I HAD TIME TO... Return to a place I love with people I love.

DID YOUR ADVENTURE SHIFT YOUR PERSPECTIVE IN ANY WAY?
I think about travel as an opportunity to feel differently in various places and to explore what that means for what’s possible in life. Maybe that can be because of something simple, like the time you eat dinner or how you dress for certain places, but it’s a beautiful reminder that there’s more to experience in my life than the bubble and pace of New York.

BEFORE THIS TRIP I HAVE NEVER... Been who I am this summer

BEST THING I ATE... Anchovies and butter on toast, at least once a day

I’M COMING HOME WITH... Too many antique linen bedspreads, pillowcases, and nightdresses from my favorite brocante in Biarritz. In the years before, I’ve traveled home with chairs, a lamp, small tables. You will get strange looks.

SOME MEMORIES I WILL TREASURE ARE... Afternoon lunches turning into dinners turning into dance parties. The cold ocean of the north feeling like it fixes everything.

Where are you from?
Peru.

Happiness is…
Fulfillment, humor, family, friends, color combos, good outfits.

Love is…
Complicated.

What is the first thing you do every morning?
Cuddle my dog, Syko.

What is something you struggle with?
Procrastination.

When do you feel loved?
When people give me their time.

What do you love?
I love medieval art. I love people watching. I love my dog, my family, my friends, children’s drawings, sea water, flat whites, my iPad, fatty tuna, hyenas, Tony Soprano…

What does desire mean to you?
I don’t want to say being wanted... Maybe it needs to be redefined. Maybe something that’s attainable.

When do you feel sexy?
I feel sexy when I’m wearing a good outfit, but I could also dress like a bloke and still be feminine.

READ

What is a piece of writing that you hold dear to your heart?
Pour Me: A Life by A. A. Gill

What’s your favorite quote from this piece?
“There is a name for this sudden slap of art, this falling through rabbit hole of civilization. It’s Stendhal’s Syndrome: Being Overcome By Beauty.”

WATCH

What are three films about love that we should watch?
In The Mood For Love, Lips Of Blood, The Piano

What’s your favorite movie of all time?
The Color of Pomegranates

Sofia Testino is a model, designer, and longtime Cou Cou muse based in New York City.

This interview was originally published in February 2025, as Volume 8 of Cou Cou Talks.

The uniform was assembled in response to changes in my life. After leaving London, I stopped working as much so I could focus on starting new creative projects.

Then, those projects were up and running and I was working all the time. Both phases — the no schedule, scribbling beginning and the locked-in deadline-chasing that followed required me to take myself seriously.

Getting dressed every day was a part of that. This is common knowledge for anyone who works from home, has ever faced a bout of unemployment, felt better at the office because they got up earlier to get ready, or read Joan Didion’s On Self-Respect.

My new uniform was arranged around the simplest of items: the t-shirt. This was somewhat incidental; not sprung from the millennial founder mindset that reframed the garment as a productivity tool. I did not decide to bring perfect t-shirts into my life to enable me to make better decisions. I did not intend to optimize. I just came into a few tees that looked good on me, and I noticed that I liked how I felt wearing them again and again.

One early favorite was a tight grey cotton long-sleeve that my mom bought at the mall in the 2000s. I found it in her closet in a pile of tees from the same time and gobbled them all up, eyes aglint with the belief that they just don’t make them like this anymore.

Soon, I developed a criteria for the shirts that stuck in my rotation:

• Cotton!

• No graphics… Though I love the likes of a vintage Mickey Mouse tee, solid options with the occasional stripe give me a peaceful feeling of security

• If long-sleeved, sleeves must extend past the edge of my wrist (I’m tall and so have been constantly made to suffer here)

• The fit should be close, revelatory of the body

• Bateau neck = yay. On that note…

• If boxy, altered (by my scissors) to fit off-the-shoulder

The rest of the look varied depending on my mood and plan for the day — jeans, a simple black skirt or cotton yoga pants.

I found my life easier. It had something to do with the new purity of getting ready, but more to do with the fact that I looked good. This, to me, is what makes or breaks a tee. It can be perfect in theory — the most preened-over fit with the best construction and materials, enlivened by a legacy of beautiful women who have worn it — but if it doesn’t suit you, it’s over. Try again.

This is why you can’t look like Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy or Jane Birkin (though I can speak from experience that Cou Cou’s Rina Long Sleeve will get you as close as anything will), or any one of the great t-shirt wearers of history solely by wearing the same clothes as them.

A t-shirt is simple, but it responds to the essence of the wearer. Over the years I’ve found that romantic styles suit me best — empire waists, flushed cheeks, old world feelings. And so I seek tees that help me look and feel this way, if only through a slashed neckline that evokes the slouch of a chemise, or a tight fit that shows my waistline.

When I moved back to New York full-time last fall, my life changed again. I was busier with work than ever, and now more out-and-about and socially engaged. I put together a drawer of my favorite tees, which I could depend on to throw on a few minutes before a meeting or an event where I anticipated knowing no one.

A stylist recently told me that preparation is an act of care, for yourself and for those around you. It reduces the probability of stress, hurrying, meltdowns. Preparation as care is a closet full of clothes you actually like and a drawer of shirts you know you’ll want to wear every day. It’s an act of self-respect too. I can see it at play when I put on a t-shirt I love. I know I like this t-shirt because I know what I like about myself.

Cou couuuu substack,

If you didn’t already know, it’s a Cou Cou summer! We’re setting up our New York Pop-Up (open from May 29th to June 20th) as we speak and we’ve just launched our summer campaign, starring Alana Champion, Noor Mutsaers and Rachelle Harris shot by Lauren Leekley, somewhere in the Cotswolds. A dreamy, pastoral setting that holds a lot of meaning for us.

Cou Cou began here, during endless strolls through the English Cotswolds. Looking back now, it feels almost impossible to separate the landscape from the brand itself. It was here I began imagining a different way of being and a new philosophy of femininity and freedom: a brand that honoured the truth of our female, embodied experience. One that cherished the beauty of everyday things and approached our most intimate layers with more care — for ourselves and for the planet. Grounded in the belief that, as women, we are our most beautiful when we’re most comfortable in ourselves.

I remember so vividly on those long walks with my little notebook thinking, “One day maybe I’ll create a campaign here.” Returning years later to shoot this, mere minutes from where those dreams first lived, feels deeply full circle... like meeting that younger version of myself along the path, in her wellies, twirling daisies between her fingers, and telling her it all came true.

This campaign is an invitation to come home to ourselves this summer. To feel the joy and warmth of summer on our skin and in our hearts. To be fully present for precious moments with loved ones. To make daisy chains in the grass, water the flowers, and play long afternoons of badminton in the garden with a pint of Pimms, perhaps.

Thank you for being here and part of this journey with me. Hope you love the new pieces and have a summer full of play <3

Love,

Rose x

On Saturday morning, we invited our nearest and dearest to Dover Street Market London to celebrate Mental Health Awareness Month and our collaboration with Adwoa Aboah, in support of Gurls Talk. Like the limited-edition tee that we designed together, featuring the slogan ‘Out of Order’, inspired the memoir Mad Wife by Kate Hamilton, it was an invitation to celebrate life’s messiness and to disrupt the societal expectations that life throws onto us.

“In Mad Wife, [Kate] talks about how her life is unraveling, in disarray and chaos,” Adwoa said to open the event. “Throughout the book she transforms into an unapologetic, outspoken woman… to be ‘out of order’ is to be freed within a patriarchal system.”

In that same spirit, Adwoa, Alexa Chung, Camille Charriere, Liv Little, Charli Howard, Lea Ogunlami and our founder Rose Colcord, all shared stories and reflections on their experiences with mental health, womanhood and navigating life in a world that doesn’t always encourage us, as women, to be open and honest – to embrace our full spectrum of emotions, to share our experiences and embrace imperfections.

It was a reminder that we’re really all in it together. One’s mental health journey isn’t often linear, we have to experience the ups and downs, go through certain moments and lessons to figure out who we are – and challenge the narratives that we’re often told. Because it’s through vulnerable moments, like sitting in a room of strangers who all happen to have loads of things in common – not just a love of fashion, or pointelle – that connect us most deeply to one another.

After the readings and in between bites of sweet treats from Rose Bakery, guests were invited to share stories of their own in a confidential, safe space, and to choose a book from the Cou Cou Library to take home. For the event, we curated a special selection of memoirs and essays with Adwoa on the power of our lived and shared experience, and so we thought we share them with you here on substack for your reading pleasure.

Consider this your ‘Out of Order’ reading list…

BODY WORK BY MELISSA FEBOS

Sharp, intimate essays exploring desire, identity, and the politics of living in a body.

THE YEAR OF MAGICAL THINKING BY JOAN DIDION

A meditation on grief, memory and surviving loss.

MY BODY BY EMILY RATAJKOWSKI

Essays on reclaiming ownership of the self.

MOTHER MARY COME TO ME BY ARUNDHATI ROY

A reflection on family, politics and writing.

THE COST OF LIVING BY DEBORAH LEVY

On freedom, womanhood and rebuilding a life.

EVERYTHING I KNOW ABOUT LOVE BY DOLLY ALDERTON

A witty story about friendship and modern love.

NOTES ON GRIEF BY CHIMAMANDA NGOZI ADICHIE

A tender exploration of mourning, love, and the sudden loss of a parent.

THE BELL JAR BY SYLVIA PLATH

An iconic novel tracing ambition and isolation.

BRIT(ISH) by AFUA HIRSCH

A reflection on race, identity, belonging and modern Britain.

LETTER TO MY DAUGHTER BY MAYA ANGELOU

A collection of stories and life lessons, written with wisdom, warmth and honesty.

BLACK FRIEND BY ZIWE FUMUDOH

Funny and inclusive essays unpacking race, culture and uncomfortable conversations.

INHERITANCE BY DANI SHAPIRO

A moving memoir about identity, family secrets and unexpected discovery.

HUNGER BY ROXANE GRAY

An unflinching memoir about trauma, self-image, and learning to live fully.

THE CHRONOLOGY OF WATER BY LIDIA YUKNAVITCH

A raw, lyrical memoir of survival, addiction, art and transformation.

MAD WIFE BY KATE HAMILTON

A fierce exploration of womanhood, rage and reinvention. Inspired “Out of Order”.

In honour of Mental Health Awareness Month and as part of our special fundraising project in collaboration with Adwoa Aboah, in support of Gurls Talk, Adwoa reflects on her mental health journey, motherhood, honesty, and feeling content. Shot by Zora Sicher in Los Angeles. Interview by founder, Rose Colcord.

Why did ‘Out of Order’ feel like the right message to put out in the world right now, and what do you hope it inspires in people?
What I’ve always loved doing in my advocacy work, and what Gurls Talk has always stood for, is that there’s a human element to what we do. Even though the topic is serious, there’s a messiness to the community I’ve been able to create, and that’s the state of being I feel most natural in. I don’t resent my past like I used to. I feel protective of it, and I respect it, because it’s the reason I am who I am. It’s the reason I’m standing here, and the reason I get to do the work I do.

‘Out of Order’ is about the messiness of life – the things you have to navigate to find a state of peace. You have to have moments that feel completely out of order and un-linear, because life itself is un-linear, and so is one’s mental health journey. It’s also about navigating the world in a way that feels natural to you - as a person, as a woman, as a being – to do things your own way, to stand up for what matters, and to go against societal norms that are placed on you.

It’s a ‘give a fuck’ attitude. I feel it’s so much at the moment after having a child. I’m constantly told what path suits me, what I should do to fit into a box. It’s like, please, just stop telling me how to live my life, how to be, what’s palatable for you to understand motherhood or womanhood. I feel softer, but more savage as a woman now. I feel even more determined to do things my own way.

When I think of my own journey with mental health, the times when I felt out of order – it makes you feel like an outsider, and like you want to hide. What you’ve done with Gurls Talk is break that stigma, and as soon as you break that and connect, something shifts. Does that resonate?
Totally. For me, personally, I spent a lot of time seeking external validation in order to make myself feel better about myself, and then when I started going against that, my world opened in the most beautiful way. It was very scary, and it was a state of unknown, but it is continuously exciting to learn more about myself. I’m so curious. I’m curious about the good, and the mess. I’m willing to learn all the time and grow as an individual. So this [project] is an invitation to start doing things your own way, and it’s a celebration of all the things that make us individual; how those similarities and the individualities are what binds us together as communities.

When I started sharing my story, I really felt like I was the only person on the planet who was going through it. And then what happened was I was introduced to a community of people who understood what I was going through, and so all those moments of feeling out of order had only brought me closer to a community and to an understanding of self.

You said ‘Our lived and shared experience, as women, is the source of wisdom and healing.’ Can you speak a bit more on your philosophy on that?
I stand by that so firmly. There’s so much information that backs how important it is to see someone that might not look like you, share their story with you. Through that story, you can relate, and that makes you feel less alone. What’s important is going back to the emotions. It’s about meeting someone where they’re at with empathy, kindness and a listening ear. Sometimes it’s not about advice, it’s just a nod of recognition. It’s a celebration. It’s like, ‘I hear you.’ I’m getting outside my own bubble of privilege, and I’m meeting you where you’re at. Stories of hope, resilience, how someone got through something, there’s not always enough concentration on those stories.

It’s being brought to my attention even more so now, being a mother of a daughter and the realization I will protect her the rest of her life – for the rest of my life. She will have to go through life, and all its intricacies and how messy it can be. I can’t stop that, because she has to walk through that in order to shape her own sense of self.

Can you remember a time where you internally felt out of order?
Probably being pregnant, and just my identity being ripped away from me. I had worked so hard before that, getting sober, figuring out who I was away from drugs and alcohol, and then I was thrown into this space where I had to figure that all out again. It was terrifying. Everything that I’d lent on, whether that was work or being busy or my ego, had been stripped away because I didn’t have any of those things anymore. It was a big smack in the face, where I had to just sit with myself once again. I felt completely out of order. I felt terrified, but obviously extremely happy.

And how do you look back on that time now?
Just with real pride. I’m so grateful for what my body was able to do. There’s so many of us who can’t do those things and their path is a different one, so I feel very grateful that I was able to do it that way. Going back to these societal norms that are thrown on us, when I talk about anything that I’ve been through in my life, I really make sure to talk about it in the most honest way that I can because there’s so much shame surrounding so many things that we have to go through as individuals. I refuse to buy into that rhetoric.

I refuse to be a part to play in our shame, around being a mother, around doing whatever the fuck that we want to do that makes sense for us. There’s too much of that in the world.

What do you think women deal with the most shame around right now? What do you think women need to hear today?
It’s endless, isn’t it? Whether it’s our bodies, the way we show up for ourselves, or the topics that we want to talk about; we’re too candid, we’re too vulnerable, we’re too open, we’re too loud, we’re too quiet. We breastfeed, we don’t breastfeed. We have natural births. We don’t have natural births. We can’t get pregnant. We do get pregnant. We want children. We don’t want children. The list goes on. Sometimes it feels like we can’t do anything right.

What grounds you when you’re feeling out of order?
It’s nothing in particular. It’s just those moments of calmness. As I’ve gotten older, I feel so content in my life. I think it’s really important that one continuously asks themselves, ‘When is it all enough?’ Because we’re always reaching. We’re always eager for more and more and more. Feeling content is what makes me feel in order, not out of order. Dancing, looking at my daughter, just literally staring at her – watching her go about the world. They’re so pure. It’s so nice to watch her experience the world.

“If you look the right way, you can see that the whole world is a garden.”

–Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Secret Garden

It’s finally Spring in London! The birds are chirping a bit louder than usual, and the grass is the color green you can only dream of most grey sky winter days. This time of year always brings with it a sense of renewed energy, of excitement, you can feel it in the air – even it’s just to sit outside the pub in the sun again, without wearing a massive puffer.

Pints aside though, when I was walking through Hackney Churchyard Gardens the other day, I had to make a point to stop and sit for a while. Take in the light, all the fallen pink blossoms – nature’s confetti – lining the sidewalk. I hadn’t actually spent time outside, “in nature” (though it’s a far stretch to call a city park that) in so long. I’d been dreaming of it, sure, especially in hearing about our spring campaign star Kiko Mizuhara’s experience swimming with the whales in Okinawa – how incredibly special! It’s just been so busy, the days truly just fall into each other, it’s sometimes hard to feel like there’s time to just sit outside – to take it all in, and be still. It is truly so important for us, as humans, to feel connected to nature. So let this be your reminder to get outside and touch grass, literally, though figuratively can work too…

In that spirit, here are a selection of works on this beautiful earth we call home, nature, interconnection, renewal & hope.

SELECTED WORKS: ON EARTH

On this beautiful earth we call home, nature, interconnection, renewal and hope.

BRAIDING SWEETGRASS BY ROBIN WALL KIMMERER

Braiding Sweetgrass is a poetic celebration of the reciprocal relationship between humans and nature. Drawing on indigenous wisdom and scientific insights, Kimmerer advocates for stewardship of the earth, fostering a deeper appreciation for its wonders and promoting sustainable living.

THE ECOLOGY OF FEMINISM AND THE FEMINISM OF ECOLOGY BY YNESTRA KING

An essay on eco-feminism that explores the interconnectedness between us as women and the earth, offering hope for a renewed understanding of environmental justice from the feminist perspective.

Read here.

UPSTREAM BY MARY OLIVER

Upstream invites us to immerse ourselves in the beauty of nature, quiet stillness. Through her visceral poetry, she shares the sense of deep peace and healing we can experience when we feel at home with the natural world.

THE SECRET GARDEN BY FRANCES HODGSON BURNETT

A childhood favorite for many of us, The Secret Garden is about a girl who discovers a neglected garden on her uncle’s estate and through the process of nurturing it back to life, finds healing, renewal and a sense of belonging.

TOUCHING THE EARTH BY BELL HOOKS

This essay delves into the need for ecological justice through the lens of gender and race, inspiring a deeper appreciation for our interconnectedness with the earth, each other and a united ecological consciousness.

Read here.

THE OVERSTORY BY RICHARD POWERS

This piece intricately weaves together the lives of its characters with the majestic power of trees, exploring the intricate web of the profound interconnection between humans and nature.

INTIMATE NATURE: THE BOND BETWEEN WOMEN AND ANIMALS BY LINDA HOGAN & MORE

A collection of essays that depict the innate connection between women and animals. Through diverse perspectives, it illuminates the complexities of the bonds, revealing how they shape and enrich the lives of both humans and animals.

The first thing that you put on your body in the morning, every day, is always your underwear. It’s the garment that’s closest to you, comfortably hugging your frame in all the right ways and acting as the foundation of your outfit – of your mood, even – setting you up for the day. So don’t you think you deserve undies that are not made from literal plastic?

Our intimates are our first layer, our second skin, protecting our most intimate parts. There’s been a lot of talk recently about ditching synthetic activewear and working out in all organic cotton, but first and foremost we need to turn our attention to down there. Ideally, we would avoid polyester clothing entirely, but it’s our underwear that matters most. Consider it self-care! If you’re natural-fiber curious, looking for cute, comfy underthings and everyday essentials made from 100% organic cotton… we can help.

Cou Cou was founded for this very reason – there was and still very much is a lack of women’s underwear made from 100% organic cotton that feel both considered in design and comfortable enough for everyday wear. Pieces that make you feel confident and good in yourself, ready for any and everything that could be thrown at you. It all started with our signature pointelle thong.

Even though we’ve expanded to intimate essentials and those everyday, elevated basics you know and love, we’ve kept the same high standards. And you should too.

Polyester is literally plastic. You deserve better.

Did you know that only 7% of intimates are sustainably sourced? Most modern undies are made from synthetic fabrics like polyester and nylon (aka plastic), meaning they’re not made with your health in mind. These fabrics are also not made to last – when was the last time you tossed a pair of way-too-stretched-out briefs into the bin? Or a thong that’s somehow managed to get holes in the crotch? Our most worn garments, unfortunately, very quickly become our ‘most disposed of’ ones: synthetic underwear ends up spending more time in a landfill, than your top drawer.

That’s why all your Cou Cou’s are made from 100% organic cotton, of the highest quality possible. Our 100% GOTS Certified Organic Cotton is free from synthetics, harsh dyes and chemicals. It’s naturally breathable, hypoallergenic, and non-toxic. It’s literally better for you.

Why does organic cotton matter?

By design, synthetic fibres cling tight to the skin and trap heat and moisture. They are often made using harmful chemicals and shed dangerous microplastics, especially when worn while exercising – or just sweating in the summer, really – because heat speeds up absorption. Microplastics can infiltrate human tissues. They’ve been found in our bones and bloodstream; without getting too woo woo about it, they are linked to causing inflammation and can impact reproductive health too.

Whereas organic cotton is known for its comfort and breathability. It’s recommended by gynaecologists because it’s PH-friendly, reducing risk of irritation and pesky infections like UTIs and yeast infections. Just by wearing organic cotton undies you can reduce the risk of hormone disruption and vaginal microbiome imbalance. But beyond your top drawer, it’s just an all-around high quality fabric known for being super-soft and hypoallergenic too, so it’s gentle on even the most sensitive skin.

It’s better for you, and better for the planet too.

All of our products are made using the highest quality, 100% organic cotton available. It’s sustainably sourced, grown and organically farmed in the beautiful region of Izmir, Turkiye. No synthetic pesticides, GMOs, or harsh chemicals are used. Just clean, traceable cotton that’s certified to OEKO-TEX ® Standards. We’re also one of the few female-founded intimates brands to be B Corp Certified, which means we’ve met some of the highest standards in the world when it comes to caring about people, planet, and purpose.

It’s something we’re really proud of here at Cou Cou – being able to design organic cotton everyday essentials that aren’t boring, plain or just functional, but comfortable and cute. With elevated details like French lace, delicate picot trim, and an effortlessness and undone femininity about them that makes you feel confident and beautiful, everyday. Like you deserve too.

As our dear friend Liana Satenstein wrote, when she slipped into her 100% organic cotton signature pointelle thong: “I finally felt like the woman I wanted to be.”

Kiko Mizuhara reflects on the ocean, meditation, and the small rituals that bring her back to herself. Shot by Erika Kamano in Okinawa, Japan. Interviewed by Founder, Rose Colcord.

This was a particularly special project for us to do together. When we were deciding where to go, you said Okinawa was particularly meaningful to you. Why is that?Because I started really thinking about being kind to the environment through being under the ocean. I started scuba diving during Covid, and I got my first scuba diving license in Okinawa. It’s a very important place for me.

How did scuba diving change your relationship with nature?
I already loved the ocean, but being under it for a long amount of time made me realize how all these fishes and creatures that live underwater are similar to us. It was a really eye opening experience — all the colors are neon, unexpected, and so inspiring.

I realized that when you go underwater, you have to put on sunscreen, and so many sunscreens are toxic for the ocean. I started thinking, “I’m feeling healed every time I go to the ocean, but am I doing the same to the ocean? Am I benefiting from it, but destroying the environment?”

That made me think about what kind of person I want to be. I want to be equal to the environment, because it gives me so much healing and peace. I started getting curious about ancient knowledge and plants, and that’s how I started my brand kiiks, an organic cosmetics brand — to share what I learned and be more kind to the Earth.

The ocean and scuba diving also made me understand how to be in a meditative state of mind, because when you’re in the ocean, you really have to be calm.

Do you have a memory or a moment in time where you felt in complete harmony and awe of nature?
I had a chance to swim with the whales, and there was one moment when the male whale started singing love songs to the female. They’re huge, so the whole ocean was vibrating. I could feel the vibration through my whole body — and it made me realise that when we communicate, when we listen to the breeze — everything is a vibration. What you put out is so important, and what you receive is also very important. That really made me understand the world a little better.

We both practice Vipassana. How do you feel your meditation practice has made you more attuned to the world around you?
I did a ten day silent retreat last year. Vipassana was really challenging because it’s not a normal meditation, it’s more a deep self-discovery. When you try to keep your mind calm, that’s when your mind gets loud. That’s how you learn all your habits of the way you’re thinking, your childhood memories, and you just untangle all this stuff that you learned. It’s tough at times, but it’s a beautiful experience to really connect with yourself. Meditation really made me see things from a distance and absorb what’s going through my mind… and that allows me to just accept myself.

It also made me realize when you’re on your phone or when you’re with people, you’re constantly absorbing — your subconscious is constantly absorbing — and sometimes you just have to sit down and meditate to realize what you absorb, and what you know. There’s things that you can let go, and there’s things that you can just keep to yourself.

Are there any small rituals or daily practices that help you stay rooted and grounded?
I try to take baths as much as I can. I’m Japanese, so being in hot water makes me feel really grounded and calm. I like to breathe in and out, and feel my body floating and sinking. Somehow that makes me really calm. It just makes me feel alive.

I also started journaling last year, and I think it’s so important to write down what goes through your mind. Sometimes I read my old journals, and I think looking back on what you were going through, reflecting on your past and reading the journey that you went through is very important. My life is my journey. It’s important to have one thing that you do for yourself. So journaling or being in hot water reminds me to connect with myself.

What is your wish for our generation?
Last year, I was thinking about my ancestors a lot, and they didn’t really have a choice in their lives. My grandpa was always grumpy, and I didn’t understand why, but now I know he had a really tough childhood. He couldn’t tell anyone, and when I think about that, it’s really sad. Now, our generation is acknowledging that healing is important, that connecting with yourself is important. We’re learning so much about meditation and mindfulness, and I want our generation to really achieve that. I want to continue that — for people to connect with themselves and help each other. I really believe that can lead somewhere peaceful. Everything is a vibration, and we can help each other.

Kiko Mizuhara is a model and actress, having made her debut in Norwegian Wood (2010) and set to star in Takashi Miike’s upcoming film. She is the founder of Office Kiko and kiiks, and a longtime Cou Cou muse, based in Tokyo, Japan.

Director and photographer Coco Baudelle talks on Toni Morrison, motherhood, legacy and happiness.

Where are you from?
I’m from Montreal and I live in New York.

What do you dream of?
Walking on the set of my first feature film. Ah! To be directing and hearing scores for the first time and editing through the night.

Who inspires you?
Mothers who work in cinema. Chloë Sevigny, Penélope Cruz, Regina King, Sofia Coppola. There’s something really moving to me when I see a film made by or starring a woman who is also someone’s mom.

What is your favourite word?
Piccino (means “little one” in Italian), I have it engraved on a small gold lighter.

Happiness is…
A rose garden. Coffee from a gas station. The smell of Chanel powder blush. Falling asleep on the beach. A hot shower. A really tight baby hug. Surprisingly singing on key. Movie theatre popcorn sprinkled with Sour Patch Kids. Holding hands. Baby cologne.

What’s something you struggle with?
I’ve always struggled with the idea of legacy. That you have to do something big and important by a certain age or you’ve wasted your entire existence. But I realize now that what’s really important is to be good. Just be good. It’ll always make someone a little happier, and that person will make someone else a little happier, and this will continue on forever. It’ll never be lost and it will never stop.

What’s a conversation that recently impacted you?
All of my conversations with my mom feel different since I had a baby. They’re so much more colourful, almost painfully beautiful and understanding. Everything she says now, I hear it knowing she held me through sleepless nights, knowing her hair fell out after having me and her back probably hurt too, knowing her heart broke the way mine breaks when a kid steals Rosetta’s toys at the playground. I always wondered why we are so deeply attached to our mothers, and I think all of those things they say babies can’t remember because they are too young are actually the strongest memories we have.

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What’s a piece that has impacted you or changed your perspective?
Toni Morrison and Motherhood: A Politics of the Heart.

How did you come across it?
When Rosetta was first born, I stayed up all through the night every night to feed her... One night I saw an excerpt from the book and I read it over and over again. I couldn’t believe how those thoughts were articulated, especially at a time where my mind was so scrambled, so tired and also in such deep awe.

Have you read anything else recently that has impacted you or shifted your perspective in some way?
I haven’t had any time to read lately, but I love reading poetry. Nayyirah Waheed writes the most compact, poignant and beautiful poetry. I love her book Salt.

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Favorite film of all time?
Erin Brockovich <3

Favorite director?
Xavier Dolan.

Who’s a character that inspires you?
Anamaria Vartolomei’s character in Audrey Diwan’s Happening. Full of wit, courage and radiating with a very intense beauty.

Three films that have shifted your perspective and why?
Mommy, directed by Xavier Dolan – This movie made me feel the heartache of loving a child so much. The complexity of being a mother figure and the eternity of longing for your mother to hold you safe.

Happening, directed by Audrey Diwan – I remember being left without a word after watching this film. I felt a slight panic and pressure to protect other women and not let this happen again.

Burning Cane, directed by Phillip Youmans – This film won Best Narrative Feature at the 2019 Tribeca Film Festival. Phillip was 17 when he directed this movie, with pretty limited resources, and it is shockingly poetic. I still can’t believe him and his friends pulled it off. I feel thrilled thinking about these kids making this big movie.

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Favourite album?
Ain’t That Good News by Sam Cooke.

Favourite song?
“Crazy” by Patsy Cline. This song is so smooth. Even though it’s a sad song, it feels so warm and nostalgic to me. I’ve loved this song since I was really little. Patsy and I share the same birthday, she’s my girl!

Lyrics I love…
You’re just like an angel
Your skin makes me cry
You float like a feather
In a beautiful world.
– “Creep” by Radiohead

Favourite artist?
Eddie Murphy is probably my favorite comedian and actor. He’s remained so brilliant all through his career. A star!

What podcasts are you currently listening to?
My favorite podcast was called “Reply All”. It’s over now, but it’s a really nerdy show about the internet. The two hosts were always making fun of each other and they would do the wildest things together, like travel to India to find the person who tried to scam them over the phone. And they found them and became friends! You can still listen to all the episodes. I highly recommend.

Coco Baudelle is an actor, photographer, filmmaker, mum to two little ones, and Cou Cou muse. She’s based in New York City. Growing up, her favourite ever film was Alfonso Cuarón’s The Little Princess (1995).

This interview was originally published in September 2023, as Volume 1 of Cou Cou Talks.

What’s your favorite thing ever?
Skateboarding.

What’s essential?
My skateboard. English breakfast tea – two sugars, oat milk. Books are essential to me. Water. My keys. A good outfit.

What makes the perfect t-shirt?
For me, it’s just the fit of it. I’m very particular. I hate having shirts that go over the butt. The sleeves have to be not too long, not too short, just right in the middle. The tag is super mellow. It’s simple, not too itchy. It’s a classic piece. Everybody needs a plain white tee.

What’s a perfect day for you in New York?
A perfect day is with my skateboard, just walking around and seeing friends. Getting into something random, going to an art show. Just chilling.

What brought you to New York?
My Dad’s from here and he would always romanticize it. I also grew up with Hey Arnold, the cartoon, and those kids looked like they had so much fun. I watched skating videos, and you’d see Tompkins, Union Square, Astor Place, and I was like, I want to be there.

When [the skate film] Cherry came out, I bought me and my Mom two Amtrak tickets so I could come for the premiere. That was my first time in New York, but I knew everybody through the internet so they were so hype to see me. It was unreal. It just felt like home. From there, I would just save my money and come back and forth every summer break, every winter break. I finally moved here in 2017. It’s almost 10 years later. I’m a little bit tougher now, I guess. I don’t let people walk all over me, don’t really people please as much. I would say New York helped me grow up a little.

What do you love about New York?
It represents me in every way. It’s fast-paced, never sleeps, it’s always moving, constantly recreating itself. It’s funny, I was obsessed with New York City trash cans. The old, metal ones with the diamonds. In my old phone, if you go through it, it’s just pictures of trash cans. And I thought it was so cool, how people dressed. I dressed like that in Florida, [but] people would look at me all crazy. When I came here I was like, Oh cool, I can wear whatever. I can be myself and not have to tone it down.

Do you listen to music?
I do. It’s definitely essential, especially when I’m skating.

Do you have a song you like to listen to every day?
Right now, my go-to is Justin Bieber’s “Yukon.” I love that song so much. I’ll play it every morning when I’m in the shower.

Do you have a bedtime routine?
[When I’m] winding down for bed I’ll put on Everybody Hates Chris, just for background noise. I’ll start getting ready: shower, do my little skincare routine, pour two glasses of water and try to drink them before bed. Then I’ll get into bed, open up the laptop and play some skateboard videos. I watch them everyday – they’re very essential to me. I love the sounds and the different tricks. They just make me happy.

What do you find beautiful?
New York City. People watching. I love seeing an old lady walking up the stairs by herself in the winter. I think that’s beautiful. It gives me hope that when I’m that age I can still do it – still do New York, even if it’s by myself. Even though they terrify me, kids in a group [are beautiful], just hanging out almost like it’s their first day on Earth. Everything is new to them. As you get older you’re like, I’ve seen it. But a baby, when they see grass they just grab it. Life is so cool, you just have to remember to appreciate it. I think those things are beautiful, just watching people exist.

Beatrice Domond grew up in Miami Beach, Florida and is now based in New York City. She is an artist, designer and professional skateboarder. She made her film debut in Bill Strobeck’s “Cherry,” and not long after became the first woman signed to Supreme’s skate team.