Guys… I’m finally coming back to life. If you know me, you know hating the heatwave is my entire personality. But that’s because it really takes a toll on my mental health. I had a lovely weekend (more on that in a sec), but coming home to a hot, sun-drenched space is ROUGH. And yes, I know I should buy a new portable fan (I don’t have central air, and the current bedroom fan is ancient from my parents’ garage and I think on its last limb). Anyway, once the sun set, I was back on track. Whew!

Ok, so my weekend… I was graciously hosted at The Valorian West Hollywood, Curio Collection by Hilton (formerly The Mondrian) in West Hollywood. And that hotel just has so much Dahvi lore. I haven’t stayed there since 2021 when it was still its former hotel. But some of you may recall I had my birthday there this year (for literally the 6th time) It’s always a classic though. You may not realize at first glance, but the hotel does have some design differences from the shift. When I got my personalized tour, I learned that everything is Alice in Wonderland-themed. Once that was pointed out, I spotted it everywhere. And when I toured the rooms, they explained every bit of detail, which was cute. So yes, while the layout of the hotel and overall vibe is the same, there are changes you’ll notice if you stay.

They put me +1 in a huge suite. It was really nice, with a kitchen, living room and a beautiful view of the West Hollywood Hills (my fav). And I’m old pals with one of the bartenders, so it’s always a fun time. I even got in the pool, which is so funny because I feel like Palm Springs is the only place I get into hotel pools.

I got to catch up with a handful of friends this weekend. Some came to visit at my luxe home for the weekend, while others we met out and about. Whenever Jen Cady visits me from Santa Monica, we always find ourselves out in Weho. It’s just the most natural stop for us. And it just so happened our recently married friends Cha and Jackie were out with family and they spotted us in the wild. So we had a blast accidentally hanging out with them.

The rest of the week was full of beauty stuff, networking, the usual. I had a facial at the Maybourne in Beverly Hills, hosted by KNESKO. Ok, that spa is actually insane. I was extremely impressed. I even took a 20-minute nap in the women’s lounge.

I also went to the launch event for the Sephora x Olive Young partnership. I was invited by Sephora’s team, and it was so lovely. They personally took me around and there were a lot of cute photo moments and decor. I’m not familiar with most of the OY brands that joined, but what a mega opportunity for them. Excited to try the goodies.

At the event, I ran into Sephora’s former beauty director Melinda (pictured below). I was on her podcast a couple months ago, so we’ve always had a special connection since then. I respect her in so many ways. Just a really awesome person, and it’s meaningful to me that I’ve gained acknowledgment from someone of her caliber.

I also had the OGEE Eye Sculpt Liquid Eyeshadow lunch at Polo Lounge, and wow, this is a launch I’m really excited about. As beauty writers, you can guess that we’ve seen and experienced many products, so to get excited about something is a lot of fun. We played with the shadows at the table and they were blendable, didn’t crease and truly just a beautiful formula. I’m really excited to put them to use on my eyes. The brand is launching at Sephora in Oct, and I broke that story, which you can read HERE. It was fun connecting with the founder Abbott who honestly felt just like one of us. Super down-to-earth and seemingly laidback. We love to see it! Shoutout to Candice for hosting and putting it all together.

A bit of a shorter update this weekend. But lots on the agenda for the week ahead. I also have several articles I need to have done by the end of the month, so it’s a little stressful balancing events and fun stuff with all of that. But we get it done, amirite?

With that, I hope you all had a good one. I’m off to get some TikTok scrolling done. Best way to cap off a day! And I’m getting a haircut tomorrow AM - eeeeee!!!!

I recently turned in a really informative article about beauty certifications, and whether they’re marketing BS or legit. I’ll link when it goes live, because I actually learned a lot. But more importantly, I felt like the expert responses sounded like they came from the heart (shoutout to Dr. Shuting Hu and Dr. Ava Shamban).

As many of you know, when it comes to expert-led articles (anyone in any field, answering from a place of authority), some of the time it’s easiest to coordinate the Q+A via email versus phone or in person. It depends on a number of factors, but getting expert insight in written form is pretty normal. That said, the answers shouldn’t suck.

Many expert responses have become almost a joke at this point. Plenty of them read formulaic and sound the same. When I was able to gather unique insight from both experts this time, I felt like I was actually bringing fresh information to my readers. And, I could feel the knowledge and passion in these experts’ responses. I can’t say for sure whether AI didn’t guide them or whatever the case, but they were at least able to submit in a way felt organic.

All of this is why we need to have a ChatGPT discussion. Like yes, it’s there, and we know we can use it. But when you’re being contacted by a nationally recognized publication specifically for your expertise on a matter, you should be able to speak about it. So let’s break down my golden rules for submitting expert quotes, and using ChatGPT (if needed) as a light crutch, not the whole assignment.

Trust me, this is key info that will help you or your client land more opportunities and be seen as a trusted resource.

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Hey guys! All has been pretty mellow on this front. And honestly, it’s been really nice. Earlier months were packed with travel, which was extremely special, but nothing beats staying put, scorching in the Weho heat. I kid, well, kinda. Those who know me IRL know that mid-July through August test me more than any other parts of the year. It’s a little window of sun-drenched days I have to push through to get to the pot of gold at the end. The gold being fall. I think because I’m in a chill state of mind, the weather isn’t getting to me too much, but there were a few days two weeks ago when I couldn’t function. Does the weather (any type) affect you guys as much? Do I have any fellow sun-haters here?

To be fair, I do enjoy sun when I travel. And wanna know what’s crazy? It’s never sunny when I travel. Literally never. So, I dunno. But I can’t wait for fall. But I don’t wish it here too quickly, because it’s definitely the quickest moving season. I’ll share more about fall when the time comes, but there’s this magical four-week window of the year where everything counts. September 15 - October 15 (not even technically fall the entire time, but it’s when everything settles into calm). So we’re about a month away from that, which is crazy.

Highlights from this week included a personalized tour of the spectacular new Amouage boutique in Beverly Hills. The fragrance house’s first West Coast flagship opened two months ago, and it’s truly an exceptional work of art. I highly recommend checking it out, even just for a photo opp. But the scents are extraordinary, too (I’m a Guidance girl—what are you???).

I also did my first BBL+Moxi resurfacing facial. My skin feels like sandpaper. I’m so excited for the results. I don’t look too crazy (yet). We’re only on day 2 of recovery. But it’s not a super intensive facial, so I’m not too concerned. It came highly recommended at Dr. Michelle Lee’s PERK in BH. I posted a little GRWM to go out with no makeup the day after my treatment.

Lastly, I spent Saturday in Silverlake for Lion’s Gate Portal (Manifestation Day). I was invited into Subtle Senses Wellness Studio, and while I couldn’t get comfy during the sound healing experience, I felt every bit at ease. I’m deeply affected by ambiance, and the vibes at this studio were immaculate. As I squirmed through my session, I felt utmost gratitude, while envisioning what I want to attract most in life. And a little note to yoga mat brands: Please create thicker fabric. These mats do nothing for me. That aside, I felt refreshed post-session. Ashley joined me, and following our energetic refresh, we grabbed a bite at Bacari, reflected on our experience and went our separate ways.

Later that day, I attended the Smashbox Beauty Convergence in Culver City, and I swooped up some serious swag. Like, I know, I don’t need more beauty, but let me tell you… I snagged a lot of makeup I didn’t have prior and I was thrilled (three bottles of Armani Luminous Silk foundation?! Come on). It was an event for pro makeup artists, but your girl always finds a way ;). After that, I came home and manifested the night away. It was grounding and spiritual. I actually had quite the restful sleep, which can be challenging. And I woke up feeling refreshed.

Moving on… you guys, my favorite internet topic Emilie Kiser is back in the news! And this time her fanbase is turning on her ::gasp::. If you’ve been following me, you know Emilie (a popular Arizona-based mommy vlogger) lost her son Trigg tragically to a neglectful drowning incident a little more than a year ago. A police report revealed allegations that Emilie’s husband, Brady, was betting on sports inside the house while his son was alone in the backyard. Trigg allegedly fell into the pool and struggled for seven minutes. In addition to Brady’s apparent neglect, the parents refused to get a fence around their pool, as many followers pointed out over time.

At the time of the incident, I argued that Emilie could grieve in peace if she hadn’t made her son the focal point of her content. Because he was in so many videos and was infiltrated into her storytelling, naturally, her millions of followers cared when he passed. I made a case against family vlogging and child exploitation. That’s always been something I’ve stood strongly against. But some people (not all) came for me in the comments, calling me ruthless without a soul, “accidents happen,” etc…

Fast-forward to the past few weeks, Emilie and her family are experiencing backlash unlike ever before. She recently announced she’s having another baby with the same man who was reportedly distracted while her son drowned. People initially had their issues with this news, but the fans decided to support her either way. Then, shortly thereafter, Emilie went on a podcast and firmly declared she'd stop at nothing to take care of her living son Teddy, who was an infant when Trigg died.

"That was actually my final promise to [Trigg]” she said. “ ‘I will take care of your brother.’ At that time, I felt like I couldn't. It really just was too much. It felt I couldn't even take care of myself … [but] I'm going to fulfill it, and I'm gonna give Teddy the best life I possibly can, and that means showing up for him, showing up for myself, doing everything I possibly can to make sure that that happens.”

Almost immediately following, her toddler was seen on Brady’s lap on a small boat with friends, wearing no life jacket.

Thus, the floodgates opened.

For a full recounting of what transpired in the podcast-to-life-jacket pipeline, TikTok user @celestialcapricorntrash sums it up well. Meanwhile, fellow user @autumnsopinions has been extremely vocal about Emilie’s neglect, and is a well-informed resource for breaking down the discourse overall.

As this latest development has unfolded, shocking clips of Emilie have come to the surface. Among them are a video of her giggling after literally forgetting Trigg at the gym. Additionally, she admits to making things look cute on camera, despite Trigg hating certain experiences he’s forced to endure.

A definitive indicator of the fan shift came last month, when the mod team of the Emilie Kiser Subreddit announced it was stepping down as a “dedicated support hub” for the influencer. The declaration went on to say, “Like many of you, we had a lot of sympathy for Emilie and gave her the benefit of the doubt for a long time. However, the recent life vest situation, along with the blocking and deleting of respectful comments raising genuine concerns, has been disappointing to us. It has made it difficult for us to continue.”

While the mods acknowledged the account would no longer serve as a “support only space,” it isn’t transitioning into a snark page.

“Our goal is for this sub to remain civil and respectful while allowing for more open discussion,” the announcement concluded. “That reflects the direction many of our members have naturally taken.”

My goal in bringing all of this to the forefront is that same as it’s always been—to shed light on child exploitation and how easily it’s been dismissed. You don’t have to be a mother to fight to keep kids off camera. All of us have witnessed the toxicity of family vloggers, and how money and internet fame leads to relying on kids for content and losing the meaning (and responsibility) of parenthood. It’s disgusting and heartbreaking. Every single child deserves a chance to thrive at life, free from a camera.

Speaking of kids who are likely messed up from internet parents, Perez Hilton decided to subject everyone on TikTok to self-mutilation this week. Mind you, he was banned from the app in Dec. 2020 for starting drama with the internet’s angel Charli D’Amelio. He has since created endless accounts, and I have blocked every single one of them. I’m hoping that’s why I missed this disturbing moment. Apparently the livestream went on for 30 minutes, and it was a gory mess. No one from TikTok stepped in, which is crazy.

There’s obviously much discourse about Perez, karma and mental health. Here’s what I’ll say: He brilliantly (for better or worse) paved the way for two new avenues of media—blogging/digital news + instant virality. I remember starting my career as an Editorial Assistant at E! Online in 2008, and online reporting was just emerging. He was our reference point for everything. Also, celebrity gossip was decades old. But before the emergence of gossip blogs, you would go to an airport or checkout line at the grocery store, read your tabloid fodder and go on with your day. Perez normalized spreading that gossip rapidly by way of the web.

If you were alive during that era of media, you’ll recall how reliant we were on the blogs as news sources. And as salacious as they were, they were a lot of fun. We all fed into it. Perez confidently hated on everyone, and the rest of us just followed along because there was no one telling us to do otherwise. There were essentially no morals in social media and news at the time. The only time anyone cared about publishing something is if it would ruin their relationship with a talent publicist—not the celeb. And while I don’t care about protecting 90% of any celebrity’s reputation, his behavior was abhorrent.

In Perez’ heyday, he was outing peoples’ sexuality, clowning on peoples’ mental health struggles (oh, the irony), shaming their bodies (while he was significantly overweight) and publicizing inappropriate paparazzi shots of peoples’ private parts. A perfect example of this was Mischa Barton, whose weight and mental health he criticized incessantly. The trauma she endured on his behalf was evident years later, when the pair had a run-in on The Hills: New Beginnings in 2019.

“This bullying you did for so long to so many young girls, I find it hard to let go,” the former star of The O.C. told the blogger. “I really do. It’s not just about the body shaming, or outing people as gay before they’re out of the closet, like all of that stuff. I just really can’t accept the apology entirely on behalf of how I feel.”

Just before erupting in a defensive fit, Perez acknowledged, “I knew it was wrong in the past what I was doing. I was still doing it, even though I knew it was wrong.”

For one, at the height of Mischa’s career, she was, to this day, the most naturally beautiful actress I’ve ever seen. Young actresses are chewed up and spit out in Hollywood. It’s heartbreaking how things unfolded for Mischa, and we were collectively way too hard on her. For two, there was a fine line between laughing with a celeb and laughing at them.

Michael K (formerly of the iconic blog Dlisted—#iykyk) toed the line effortlessly. He would write the catchiest caption of Miley Cyrus openly smoking weed, but he would never think of outing someone’s sexuality or spreading unethical garbage. I always turned to him for comic relief. He could take the silliest photo post of, like, Kim K.’s cleavage and turn into top-tier groundbreaking news. He fed into the F-list paparazzi-fueled “characters” of the early aughts (ie. Shauna Sand, Phoebe Price—trust me you just had to be there). Perez, on the other hand, was so dark. And on top of that, his writing wasn’t even funny or witty. It was just pure hate.

All of this to say, not everyone deserves empathy, forgiveness or a second chance. People with mental health issues can indeed be very bad people. We don’t need to feel sorry for everyone because they’re going through a rough time. Yes, I feel sorry for his poor kids, of course. They didn’t choose this life. I feel sorry for the people who were accidentally subjected to his live trauma dump. I feel sorry for the people who he tormented; who lived in fear of him. But no, I am not exerting my energy to say a little prayer for Perez. If anything, it’s a reminder that karma is very real. It always takes time to see the light of day, but it does come around eventually.

With that, this was one of my longer recaps. I enjoy creating what can hopefully be a discussion here, and as always, I welcome everyone’s opinion. Let the past behavior of others be helpful lessons to all of us in the future.

Wishing you a wonderful week ahead. <3

• Looking for hotel properties anywhere in the world that have shifted from a social/party scene into more of a beauty and wellness destination. This will go live this month, pegged to National Wellness Month. (Forbes)

• Planning my annual fall fragrance trend report to go live end of Sept/early Oct, and currently accepting NEW fall fragrance samples for editorial consideration. Please note, sending a sample doesn’t guarantee inclusion, but I will give all recipients a fair assessment. Please submit only scents you would actually truly wear yourself. (Forbes)

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I still plan to do a long-awaited press trip deep dive, but it’s kind of a work in progress because there are so many elements to include. I really want to make it count. But for now, we can touch on one of the many facets of said trips: coverage. When there’s a major financial investment made in an experience for a journalist (ie. a press trip, a beauty or wellness treatment, a fancy dinner), ROI is a given, right? Not so fast.

If you read my post last week about PR gifting expectations, much of the same holds true here. But given the nature of these luxury experiences, there’s a bit more at stake. Let’s dive deeply into the realities of experiential gifting below, and how to set realistic expectations between a client and a journalist.

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A popular question among publicists is how to get a journalist’s attention in a subject line. I personally almost always click on an OPT-IN email. Whether I choose to actually opt-in or not is another story, but seeing those words signals to me that there’s a new launch I should be aware of, with gifting to boot!

Seeing “OPT-IN” in a subject line is a clear invitation for a journalist to send along their address to receive free product. But it’s key to read the email itself, because there may be fine print to take note of. But that’s a whole sub-topic we’ll get into as we dive in further below.

There are three key types of messaging when it comes to offering or receiving free product—and each one holds different weight. As either a publicist, founder or journalist, it’s crucial that you understand the implication of each offering, and set realistic expectations.

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Happy Sunday! I just returned from a super fun interview. Sadly, it’s embargoed for six months, so I’m sworn to secrecy :( but when it’s time for the big reveal, you guys will be the first to know!

Also… deep confession time… on my way home, I stopped at ::gasp:: The Beverly Center. I’ve always maintained I’m allergic to that place, but I realized it kinda serves a purpose. I dipped my toes into this new hack only a week ago when I needed clothes for Vegas (more on that further below). I realized it’s a disservice to trek all the way to Century City Mall and deal with lines, people and traffic when I can go to the eerily empty BC, hop on that eight-floor escalator, go straight to Zara and have the store all to myself. Everything at that mall is overpriced, so even if the vibes at CCM are more elite, you’re not going to find anything cheaper at BC. Yet… something like Zara, for example, is far more easily accessible. Sooo yeah, that’s what I did.

There was this legendary mall of my upbringing called The Orange Mall (#rip). If you’re from anywhere near Orange, CA you may be familiar with it. It was always empty and had a funky smell. But it was just so iconic because it had been there for years. I mean years. It was always kind of a lower tier than let’s say The Main Place or of course South Coast Plaza, but it did have its heydey. It was a one-story “boutique mall” if you will. Anyway, it was a cockraoch of sorts. Like I think it survived The Great Depression. It also survived COVID. It did not, however, make it to 2026, and was torn down in January 2025. It was truly the end of an era.

Anyway, why am I telling you this? Well, the eeriness and emptiness and outdated-ness of it all is very reminiscent of the Beverly Center, which I would call the “luxury” Orange Mall. But sadly for the BC, it lacks the character of our beloved late OM. It just feels like eight stories of energy-less empty space.

Now that we have that out of the way, let’s revisit my birthday (July 9) and the very last minute celebration I decided upon on July 11. I have to say, I totally felt the love this year and I am so grateful. People don’t always realize how much every seemingly simple text, social media comment or whatever acknowledgment at all means to another person. It meant a lot to me.

For the last three years, I opted out of doing a birthday party, and then I’d be sad when I didn’t receive a flood of birthday wishes and people getting hyped for me. So this year I took matters into my own hands and yes, I did draw attention to my birthday. Listen, as a single, elder millennial, we need the love, OK?

Anyway, I ended up doing a little hang at White Rabbit, AKA Skybar—a location I’ve had my birthday at five times prior. But like the saying goes, if it ain’t broke don’t fix it, amirite? My fabulous friends at Visit Weho ensured my party had a lovely sectioned-off area, and they showered us with champagne, fruit plates and other goodies over the course of the six-hour day. If you’re interested in a recap, HERE it is. It was fun because I had an equal mix of OG LA friends and post-pandemic friends (PPF-is that what I’m calling them now?).

This truly never happens, but the bday gods (or universe) were on my side because the outfit I hadn’t tried on prior worked out, and my makeup somehow came out the way I envisioned and also didn’t crease. I posted a video about my look HERE. In the video, I also talk about my lip combo and how much I love it. I struggle finding the perfect lip combo, and somehow it all came to me that very day, thanks to new launches from POV Beauty, Tilt Beauty and my recent Jones Road Beauty boutique visit in Santa Monica.

The morning after my birthday, it was straight to Vegas for Cosmoprof. I was hand-selected by the team to be one of their featured beauty journalists. I talk about my experience at the expo in depth HERE, but I figure over here, I’ll talk about my Vegas experience overall.

It’s fun because there are so many dinners and things to do (with and without the built-in Cosmoprof group). With all the founders and publicists out there at the same time, everyone wants to plan something with their brand. Because these dinners are in a more relaxed environment, they’re really just about having fun and getting better acquainted. It was nice, too, because there were a group of five of us from LA, and then people from other places, too, and everyone in our group from all over was easy breezy. I also got to reconnect with my friend Christina, who moved to SF after living in LA forever. She was planning to come to the convention on Wednesday, but when she saw I was in town, she flew in a day early and she got to be my guest to a Crème Shop + Euthymol dinner. We had a great time catching up!

While I did enjoy going out in Vegas, this was the first time there I didn’t do that type of going out. Each of the nights, we grabbed a nightcap at a hotel bar and then I just rolled into bed. We had long days, so by midnight your girl turned into a pumpkin! We stayed at Mandalay Bay because it’s where the convention is. And honestly, with traffic and just getting around the hotel overall, it was absolutely the right move.

Let me tell you, getting around Vegas is rough. I learned that everyone takes taxis versus Uber/Lyft because if you take the latter, you have to walk to very specific meeting points. I learned this the hard way when I was on a strict time crunch and had to make an emergency trip to Marshall’s (I didn’t want to deal with a whole mall). When I tell you I spent more time trying to get from Uber to Uber than I did actually buying something, I’m not kidding. And, no less, in 110 weather.

It’s crazy because my last real trip to Vegas was in 2019! That’s a long time ago. I actually made a trip there in early Feb of this year but it was an in and out one-night stay at the Wynn, so we didn’t venture elsewhere. But I guess this was like a real Vegas trip. Far more tame than any visits past. I still feel icky about Vegas overall and would never plan a trip on my own, but once you’re there and you’re with the right people, it is indeed fun. I did have fun this time, and when I got home, I didn’t need 100 days to recover (whew!) unlike times past.

So, anyway, good thing I did a quick rinse when I got home Wednesday night, because—surprise!—my water was off from the middle of the night through the entire next day. I had literally no clue what was going on except from TikTok later into my Thursday. ICYMI, a water main break flooded my neighborhood in the middle of the night and created a massive hole in the middle of Sunset Blvd. My street just narrowly missed the chaos, thankfully! And none of my friends in the area were affected. The businesses, however—that’s a different story. But the residential streets just south of Sunset looked like pure madness from the videos. The whole thing is so crazy, so I don’t know when I’ll be wandering the neighborhood again. But at least I’m OK.

Anyway, that’s a wrap on this week. I attended a ‘90s-themed birthday last night. Between all the dress codes we have for events, the thought of having to prep for a themed party is daunting. But you know what? I actually found something cute. A little babydoll look. And my friend Erica came over and we got ready together and it was fun. And as I was going through different ‘90s looks online and thinking back to the ‘90s in general, I realized that was hands down the best decade. Like everything good in entertainment came from that decade, the clothes were and still are extremely stylish, and it was just a badass time to be alive. What can I say? ;)

Beauty expos have evolved immensely over the last decade. In an oversaturated market, there’s plenty to go around, but with minimal breakthrough innovation. I’m extremely grateful to be ingrained in the industry and accepted as a face in this space. I absolutely love it. That said, the novelty of discovering new beauty categories, products or trends isn’t what it used to be.

I just returned from Cosmoprof Las Vegas as a personally selected guest of the expo (you can watch my vlog HERE). I was a featured journalist, and I felt honored to be there on behalf of the brand. My experience was lovely and I’ll share more on that in a fun experiential IPSY piece next week. That said, experiencing this expo (or any, for that matter) as a VIP, versus an everyday attendee is very different.

I’ll take us back to 2016, or whatever year I first attended what was then called Indie Beauty Expo (shoutout to Beauty Independent). I believe they’ve segued into BITE, but I don’t think they do an event in LA anymore. The intimate, specially curated event was my first real beauty and wellness experience. This was pre-pandemic, so any product with the name “serum” was captivating. Walking away with a full size of literally anything was like holding a coveted treasure. We were in a limited era of experimentation. It was thrilling. That expo always stood out to me as one of my favorite beauty moments of all time.

As an overall beauty enthusiast with a genuine passion for most categories (makeup and fragrance are my favorite), I will always feel a sense of curiosity and excitement when it comes to exploratory opportunities. That said, I’m realistic about what I’m going to gain from each of these. Attending Cosmoprof made many of my opinions about the current state of beauty expos abundantly clear. I do think there’s still value for media, but it also depends on what you’re looking for. My own personal expectations from these have changed, and I’m excited to share my takeaways and hopefully educate you in the process. I have some pointers for publicists as well.

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If there’s one thing I’ve learned, people love lines. They love waiting, they love wasting time. And they love posting about it. And I’m not talking about camping out for a rare sighting of Justin Bieber getting off his tour bus. I’m talking about the possibility of free lipgloss, an overpriced coffee, a generic photo opp. Hours-long lines are no longer limited to Disneyland. They’re a part of everyday life. They’re part of the culture. The brag is no longer about having exclusive access—the brag is who managed to wait longer and get something out of it. Or who can now post a TikTok about their treacherous experience with potential to go viral.

TikTok user Lindsey Cooper said it best: “Why are so many people treating shopping like an endurance sport?” After mentioning people who camp out overnight to get their hands on items that’ll be available on Sephora.com a few days later, she then references Parke, Dairy Boy and other logo brands that feed into “scarcity marketing and consumerism [which] strikes again.” (I’ve talked about this!)

Perhaps it’s an age thing, or maybe it’s because I have intimate access to a lot of brands… I don’t know, but you will never catch me waiting (unnecessarily) in line, as I realize it’s not a flex to waste a full day on a lipgloss I can buy from a website, or coffee I can get next door.

The Evolution of Pop-Up Culture

Back in the day (and by that, I mean like six years ago), these pop-ups were a whole ~experience~. They were week-long ticketed events that were executed with great intention and care. Long before TikTok was a thing, these had the app written all over them—and I would partake in these experiences again in a heartbeat. Sure, they were still driven by social media, but these were for the Instagram, elder millennial/Gen X-ers, versus the TikTok generation, which feels compelled to be at the helm of every social media moment.

Two OG pop-ups that come to mind are the Saved by the Bell pop-up, and the Beverly Hills, 90210 pop-up. These were immersive, experiential moments. They were truly for the fans. You purchased your ticket online for a designated amount, you selected your ideal time (or chose from what remained), you showed up during your pre-selected window and you stayed for 90 minutes before the next group was ushered in. In fact, even Chanel Beauty had a pop-up around that time that operated in the same way. No matter the level of popularity or the nature of the entity, everyone got what they wanted from these moments. The little tchotchke mementos, the un-rushed photo moments and a fun, easy day out with friends.

These were places where you could really connect with other fans. SBTB was a silly Saturday morning sitcom, but being in a room of fellow 90210 lovers who knew every bit of lore was incomparable. That’s because elder millennials had varying interests. Today’s generation loves all of the same things, which obviously makes the demand for one measly pop-up that much greater.

What’s funny, too, is these used to be a rare occurrence. It was a really fun, exciting experience, and as long as you had tickets, you were guaranteed entry. And entry was exquisite. There was a sit-down meal, a beverage, several immersive moments, photo opps galore. As you explored the transformed event space, you uncovered easter eggs and other references to things only the true fans would appreciate. Everyone left happy.

“The number of people seeking these out from far and wide now makes almost every pop-up an event where someone camps out the night before,” avid L.A. pop-up goer and social media consultant Olivia Frescura tells me. “Brands now over-market these pop-ups weeks in advance.”

Pop-Ups Take a Turn

With these experiences being much more frequent, navigating their disaster has become almost a rite of passage. Even Rare Beauty CMO Katie Welch told me these experiences can “start to feel formulaic.”

I wrote a detailed Forbes piece about the nature of beauty pop-ups in September, and Welch went on to tell me, “We know there will always be challenges with high-demand events, but our team has learned from both our own activations and what we’ve seen across the industry … When people are excited, there’s bound to be energy and urgency.”

From my research, there didn’t seem to be major complaints with Rare’s pop-up of that time period (officially called The Rare Beauty Powered by Shopify pop-up), and perhaps that’s because the team “invested in line management, clear communication and staffing to make the experience as smooth as possible,” Welch told me, adding, “Our approach is to meet that with kindness, preparedness and constant listening so our community feels respected and cared for, even if they’ve had to wait.”

But as these immersive opportunities have become more frequent, the majority of brands collectively still can’t get it right.

“Everyone’s hangry, everyone in line is pissed off,” said TikTok user Olivia Volpe (439,000 followers), who attended the recent Rhode pop-up in Rhode Island, adding that there were only two general workers and one girl in the back filling orders.

Meanwhile, another Rhode Island-based TikTok user, Chelsea Delman (@thesocialitefiles; 23,000 followers), told me she went into it open-minded, considering this very pop-up was her first. Jokingly calling the choice to attend, her “first public humiliation ritual,” the creator took viewers through a realistic wait in line. Coffee deliveries, shade matching and popsicles were sprinkled into her 10-hour-long wait, which she didn’t realize “would move at a glacial pace.”

Rhode ensued as Ariana Grande’s Eternal Sunshine Tour Pop-Up simultaneously caught slack in Los Angeles.

“Unless you’re one of the first hundred people in line, don’t bother,” TikTok user @emma__willett told viewers, of the experience, which took place in prime West Hollywood. “It’s not worth it. Got there at 6 a.m., got in at 3 p.m. For an artist as big as Ariana, I don’t know why there wasn’t a bigger budget allocated for this. They might as well have not done it at all.”

Supporting Willett’s frustrations, Instagram user @carlystocksax shared a sped-up version of the jaw-dropping line two-hours before the pop-up officially opened.

Below, I dive deep into pop-up woes, what needs to change, what keeps some people hooked, and whether these have sustainable potential in months to come.

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I’m still feeling refreshed from my exciting visit to NYC. I shared this last time I went there, but during my last few visits, I’ve actually felt like I have a little community out there. Like sure, there are definitely fun PR meetups, but even more than that, I have real friends out there. It’s exciting.

I remember visiting in August 2021 and feeling like I was grasping at straws trying to find plans. All I wanted was a trendy restaurant photo, and my lack of solid connections landed me a reservation on a makeshift sidewalk patio with cicadas swirling by. Now, I’m going to the best restaurants in the city with some of the most awesome people I’ve met in years.

Ok, so what prompted my most recent visit? I was invited by the insanely gracious team at Kat Burki Skincare/Lede Company on a brand trip. They really outdid themselves in every way. And I know I keep saying I’m going to do a proper press trip DOs and DON’Ts, but everything about this trip has enforced me to get ON that. They put us in first class on Delta (makes the hugest difference), had us stay at the legendary Hotel Chelsea, which is what I would call the NY equivalent of Chateau Marmont. They not only had us immersed in the brand, but they really made us feel like we were at home. There was also plenty of downtime.

I really, really appreciate that they made it feel like a brand awareness/relationship-building trip, not a trip that was going to pressure me for coverage right after. I hate that. Unless covering an experience is the trip, I don’t want to be hassled after a trip when there was no mention of coverage to begin with. But that’s an aside. I had the best time, and I extended my trip a few nights (so that’s when I stayed with my brother and his girlfriend in FiDi).

In case you’re wondering, the Westmore Beauty Body Perfecter (body makeup) and new Rhode Pocket Bronze in Pebble got me through my entire trip. The photo of me at the top of this post shows me wearing the body makeup on my arms and I swear they look airbrushed (shoutout to my brother’s gf for the pic). And I’m obsessed with all the new Rhode launches. The creamy, blendable formulas are amazing, great price points, and the new brush they included with my package makes a huge difference. I’m so impressed.

Once I wrapped NY, I returned to LA for a night, and made my way to LAX once again—this time for a quick trip to Monterey with Pura home fragrance. I was invited to the World Perfumery Congress, which is essentially a trade show for perfumers. It was actually quite fascinating because it wasn’t for consumers, meaning there wasn’t a display of new perfumes and brands to connect with. It was actually a place where perfumers could debut new fragrance notes and showcase how those notes elevate a particular scent combination. From there, people can buy those individual notes for the sake of their own fragrance development.

I had lunch with Erwan Raguenes, a charismatic perfumer employed under the umbrella of fine fragrance developer dsm-firmenich. He’s created some of Pura’s most definitive home scents, along with fragrances for Salt & Stone, Ralph Lauren candles, Aerin candles and more. I’m a huge fragrance girlie, so this visit was right up my alley. We stayed at the brand new Kimpton Mirador, where we were showered with Pura’s latest offerings (they also just partnered with the Calm app). I walked away with a ton of new scents. My absolute favorite (plugged into my wall as we speak) is the Brooklyn Candle Santorini scent. It’s an infusion of fig, amber and sandalwood. Erwan told me fig is going to be the next big it-note.

Unfortuantely most of the visit was overcast (summer doesn’t hit Monterey until later in the year), but we still were able to enjoy some exceptional meals, wine tasting at Folktale Winery and time with the brand’s sweet team. It’s funny because I love overcast weather in LA, but anywhere else, I like a little sunshine. And it’s only always sunny in LA, overcast elsewhere.

Once I returned to LA, it was nonstop. I got off the plane, changed and basically headed straight to Casita in Hollywood for an event with Sprite, which introduced its Living Tracklist campaign through Genius. Several notable music journalists and other names in the hip-hop community were asked to pick the best hip-hop song from each decade since the ‘70s. The overall top selections were put into a playlist, which was played throughout the event—which also featured surprise performances by Too $hort and Yung Miami. There were photo opps, tacos and chicken wings galore (and who can forget the speciality Sprite cocktails of course!).

The following day, I kicked off my morning with an airbrush tan from James Read himself. What a gem! His team got a suite at The Sunrose (FKA Pendry), and he spent 20 minutes ensuring I was evenly slathered with liquid bronze goodness. Believe it or not, I think this was my first time in one of the Pendry’s hotel rooms. This was beautiful! It’s interesting how that hotel took off in the beginning but has gotten lost in the shuffle of Sunset (in my opinion). There aren’t too many events there, and they don’t really have a lobby or area that encourages socializing (they used to have a popular rooftop bar). This is just my opinion, but I feel like it lacks the energy of the 1Hotel or Edition. But it could have so much potential. Also, Public hotel (former Standard space) is opening mid-July!

Thankfully I was peak tan for the Dolce&Gabbana Beauty Your Devotion fragrance launch in Beverly Hills later that day. I’ve been to the brand’s events before, but this was next level. We were greeted with a violinist, giant food spread, photo opps galore, a professional photographer and white and cream-colored everything. I’ll have a vlog going up tomorrow. It was too chic not to capture. I’ve worked with D&G Beauty’s internal team and their general PR team, and I have nothing but the best things to say. They also had professional makeup artists on hand for touchups, which was great because there were tons of new launches on display since the last time I experienced the brand’s products.

All of that makeup went on just to be taken straight off, as I hit my final stop of the day—a BioLift appointment at GoodSkin in Brentwood. The clinic’s signature treatment combines XERF radiofrequency with exosomes and growth factors. The result is supposed to be more lifted, tightened skin. You notice a difference immediately, but then it dissipates and you’re expected to see more results in a couple of months apparently. I’d heard the treatment isn’t painful, but I did feel some extremely hot points. Luckily the clinic had cool air which I was able to use effectively! For more on my experience, I posted a video HERE.

As this super fun, friend-filled weekend comes to a close, I’m feeling an especially immense moment of gratitude for my parents. I mean they do so much as it is, but they really came through for me in a pinch today. I was invited to my friend’s son’s baptism. She’s a wonderful friend and we are close, but I’m not part of her immediate social circle, and I wasn’t going to know anyone at the event except her. There was the church ceremony, followed by a reception at The Proper Hotel.

I don’t have an issue plopping myself down in the back of a place of prayer and supporting a friend. But the whole experience overall can feel anxiety-ridden when you don’t know a soul (everything post-ceremony is a bit tough). Anyway, I asked my parents if they would drive from OC to LA just to support my attendance and they kindly obliged. I’m a social person obviously, but certain situations can be tricky. It ended up being so amazing that they came. On top of helping me feel more at ease, they also got to meet a close friend they may not have otherwise. It ended up working out, and I know the experience was far more heightened having them there than not.

Lastly, as we move into July (my bday month!), my friend Camrin Agin (fall party Cam) put together a FREE 10-Day Energetic Reset through her Altyr holistic wellness company. You don’t have to start in July necessarily, it can be any time. But the reset is designed to live more intentionally. I know for me personally, acting with intention opens up energy to attract what matters. I’m less bogged down with confusion and unclarity. Each day of the reset offers a simple theme, a few small practices and a moment of reflection. Once the 10 days are complete, participants can reflect on their progress through a Sanity Checklist. If this appeals to you, feel free to share your experience with me or contact Cam directly, as I know she’s building a community of people who can check in with each other.

I feel like this update was longer than usual, but it was fun reflecting on the past week. If you’re awake reading this around the time I sent it, I love that you’re a night owl like me. Nope, not the 9pm-to-bed kind of gal. I’d love to know who my fellow night owls are! <3

Happy Sunday, you guys… this post is powered by Celsius (literally). Like, I wasn’t feeling motivated, but here we are a few gulps later. I come to you live and direct from a decluttered-ish apartment. It feels amazing! Especially once I tidy up from Pride, it should look really good.

Speaking of which, if you’ve been following along, you know that I’ve called my decluttered apt mission “Project Pride” because I wanted to host people for my annual Pride Brunch. It was thisclose to not happening, but then I told myself you HAVE to do it. And honestly, it was just the push I needed. I went through all my boxes, paid my friend Malery to help me organize, and here we are. A floor I can see. Granted, I still have a TON of stuff, but now it’s in bins and Amazon drawers—NOT on my floor. There’s still a little ways to go, but seriously it feels really good. Space is energy, and it’s hard to maintain a clear head when you have crap everywhere (ok, not crap, but you know what I mean).

I think there are things in life we take for granted, and my apartment isn’t one of them. I don’t compare myself to people who own homes or condos. Quite frankly, I don’t want that responsibility on my own. And I feel so insanely lucky that I live in West Hollywood, and that I feel safe in my apartment, I don’t know my neighbors and they don’t know me (but the guy next door is a good, safe neighbor to have), I don’t have bugs, I have a view of the city and I feel at peace here. So having cleared-up space is giving me the refreshed energy I want to feel in a place I live.

Now, let’s get into Pride… Because I’ve been doing my annual Pride Brunch each year, I can always expect people to show up. Unlike with my fall party, for example, I only invite Pride go-ers to Pride Brunch. We hang at my place for a few hours, get our much-needed nourishment, pre-game a little, do a raffle (one thing about me is I LOVE a raffle) and then we walk down to the boulevard. It’s also fun to meet up beforehand, because many of us choose a different adventure than the other, so at least we get to see each other and take pics beforehand. We even filmed a TikTok, which I was so happy about. Only a few of my close friends actively post on TikTok, so it’s hard to get people to commit and re-shoot, etc… but we did it. And FWIW, I’m the straight ally (in regards to the video). ;)

Weho Pride is fun because you just bop around. All the bars are fun (even the ones you maybe wouldn’t normally go to). Everyone’s in the best spirits and everyone’s pretty much on the same level of tipsy. And if you lose your friends, you’re always bound to make new ones. Also, I did my eye makeup using the Half Magic X Euphoria Eyeshadow Palette, and I was so impressed. It went on super easily, it was easy to blend colors and I felt like it was very beginner-friendly for people who want to create rainbow-y or shimmery looks but don’t have experience with designs. I wish I had pics of my eye look, and sadly I do not! But I highly recommend this palette.

So, anyway, happy Pride month to everyone who celebrates. Being an ally is especially important to me because I’ve always felt so welcome by the LGBTQ community. Some of my best memories and conversations for decades have been with my gorgeous girlies. And, of course, gay men have been ruining my life since senior year of high school when my crush/close friend came out of the closet (very bold move, btw, at a time like that in a conservative county). His open sexuality changed, my feelings did not. Ugh, that one hurt. I can’t say that was the last time I got overly attached to a gay man. Sigh.

Anyway, I love my adjacent community and I’m honored that I feel so welcome in these spaces. And let me tell ya, if you ever need to test your sexuality, spend ample time with a bunch of hot girlies. I just live vicariously through it all!

Moving on from Weho Pride, I need to tell you guys about my pinch-me moment Friday. Mind you, I still had about five hours worth of cleaning ahead of me for the next AM, but I just could not pass this up. Shopbop invited me to a luxurious day in Newport to celebrate the opening of their 3-day popup at Lido Village. You guys… we were dressed by two very high-end clothing labels (Alémais and Simkhai). Wow.

Then they sent me an Uber code from LA to Newport, and we kicked things off at Javier’s (if you haven’t been to Javier’s, have you even been to Newport?). That’s the one place LA stole from OC. And I don’t care how basic it is—I love it. So we had a beautiful lunch there, and then we were off to the pop-up. Then we had some downtime at the Pendry, and then made our way to a yacht, where we danced the night away with Jonathan Simkhai himself. And you guys, my outfit was so cute. Mine was green, but they only sell the white version (shorts and top) on the site. It’s sooo cute. Also, I’m obsessed with the Alémais dress as well. It’s so me!

From start to finish, I was so impressed with the entire Shopbop team. They were incredibly thoughtful and a joy to be around. Not stuffy at all. They embodied what I’d expect from the brand—elevated but fun and playful. And the guests they invited were all super sweet, too. You just never know with these fashion events. I was really happy to be included. They did an amazing job with the whole day, which must have been stressful to plan, especially with all the outfits.

In other news, my podcast episode with The Beauty Manifest host Melinda Solares went live just before Mental Health Awareness Month wrapped. For those who don’t know Melinda, she just left her longtime role as Beauty Director of Sephora (you could say she’s a big deal!). She’s featured some of the biggest names in beauty on her podcast (Shani Darden, Josie Maran, Amy Liu and Danessa Myricks—to name a few!). She’s highly respected in the beauty industry, and on top of being the ultimate cool girl, she’s a strong advocate for mental health. She’s an excellent conversationalist, who I felt so comfortable speaking to. I also think certain issues are important to discuss. In the episode, I talk about:

• ADHD - I was accurately diagnosed in elementary school when no one even knew what this was. The diagnosis made me feel so small. Nobody had “disorders” back then. I was prescribed Ritalin and then Adderall, and I 100% think it served a purpose, but I quit cold turkey sophmore year of college because I didn’t like how hyperfocused it made me. I felt too controlled and I wanted to feel more free in my mind and body. This takes me into my next topic of discussion…

• Living a Prescription-Free Existence - I like to rawdog life, so to speak. Some could think that’s a bold, dangerous move; others may appreciate the free-spirited nature of it all. I’ve always said I’ll be med-free until I truly can’t anymore. I 100% support people on prescribed medication and have seen the wonderful things it’s done to people close to me. I don’t know, I just don’t have a desire to be on anything. And that could be detrimental, who knows. I’ve struggled with my emotions the majority of my life, but I’ve learned over time how to deal with them. I do think there are certain periods where meds may have helped. I also don’t go to therapy. I truly just try to get through things on my own and naturally develop the tools to do so. For what it’s worth, I have tried therapy a few times. It’s always been a flop (for me at least). But I feel in a really good headspace at this time in my life, and I credit that to all the internal work I’ve done on my own.

• Trichotillomania - An interesting word! And if you don’t know what it means, it’s a hair-pulling disorder (yes! Another disorder—woot!) that borders on the lines of OCD. Most reported cases affect eyelashes and hair on the head. For me, it started with my eyebrows senior year of college. I’m not referring to overplucking (guilty of that, too, but that was in junior high because I wanted thin brows). The disorder kicked in when I’d have to feel my brows at every moment, and if I could feel the slightest prickly hair, I needed to pluck. It’s a debilitating feeling, because until the prickly feeling is gone, you’re constantly uneasy. As an adult, the brow situation doesn’t affect me, but it affects facial hair. If I can feel even the slightest prick, I need my tweezers ASAP. I actually opened up about it in a Well + Good piece in 2022. Highlights from the article are HERE.

• Self-Esteem - My career ups and downs have deeply contributed to how I feel out in the wild. When I landed my dream job two years into LA, I was on top of the world. I couldn’t believe this was my reality. Naturally, my confidence skyrocketed, and I was brushing elbows with all the right people. But what goes up must come down, and after getting an even better job a year and a half later, I was laid off four years down the road. I talk about layoffs a lot on Substack, but I dive deep into the one that sent me through a full decade of confidence turmoil. I’m finally on my feet again, and it feels amazing.

With that, thank you all for giving me a safe space to open up about whatever’s on my mind. Because I love you so much, I’m going to share this photo below. My friend Michael sent it to me because we have this thing about over-edited photos that celebs post. You guys, this one tops them all. It’s safe to say some of us have officially lost the plot. All in good fun. You do you boo!!

I love connecting with industry peers—so if I’m available, the location is desired and the founder and/or publicist is relevant to my scope of coverage, I’ll still take the coffee meetup. It’s fun connecting with publicists and brands, learn a bit, pick brains, you know how it goes. But of course it can get tedious. And forget about me, it’s gotta be a handful for the publicists or founders themselves.

And I think publicists understand that, which is why I’ve noticed a shift in how they’re connecting with editors. And not just one editor at a time. Beauty PR agencies in particular are successfully strategizing to connect with multiple editors at once in a way that feels warm, fun and non-abrasive.

From what I’ve seen in 2026 alone, agencies including JGroup and Foundation have set the tone for what I believe is the future of networking (at least in the beauty community). Although my referenced experiences pertain to beauty, these new networking strategies can be applied to any social or creative media industry. The response from editors has been extremely positive, and I think it’s important that founders, publicists, etc. take note.

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I feel so good right now. I’ve been craving a chill weekend, and this one was everything I could have asked for. While still short, I’ve had three full days to reconnect with myself. No events, no emails, no major plans, no major drinking. It felt wholesome, productive and grounding.

I approached last week feeling overwhelmed, and struggled to get through it. And now I feel like I’m letting out a huge sigh of relief. I’ve had a million things on my to-do list, and it’s been hard to really lock in. I’d touch on a little bit here, a little bit there, but there’s rarely the opportunity to tackle much at once. This holiday weekend, I’ve gotten up to speed with work, put another dent in Project Pride (more on that below), caught up with a few friends, went grocery shopping and simply just chilled.

This holiday weekend was especially notable because it wasn’t triggering. Growing up, holiday weekends were the best. My brother and I would watch ‘90s talk shows and fight over computer privileges. Maybe I’d have plans with a friend. But once I moved to LA (even once I accumulated close friends), holiday weekends have triggered all these feelings that I didn’t even realize I felt. They’ve often left me feeling so lonely. Like, I could have had the most bustling, exciting week prior, and then the minute the holiday weekend starts, it’s this harsh reality.

But this weekend, I was operating from a place of contentment and gratitude. I was grateful for the few friends I grabbed a light nosh with, grateful for the time I had to roam through the Weho Erewhon freely on my own timeline. Even grateful for the clutter in my apartment, because I’d rather have too much of a good thing than not enough.

My sleep, on the other hand, is a different story. I seriously don’t know what’s wrong with me, but I can’t sleep well to save my life. It’s crazy. I’ve been working with this peptide distributor Celia, and we’re about to start me on a sleep peptide tomorrow. Not sure if you guys are on the peptides train (I’m not referring to the weight loss ones–there are peptides for everything), but if you’re familiar with DSIP let me know. It’s a nasal spray. I’ll know more after my call tomorrow morning. It’s frustrating because sometimes I’ll fall asleep easily (or I’ll take Sakara’s Night Service magnesium supplements), and I find myself waking up at all hours of the night. I really hope I get to the bottom of this. Stay tuned…

Emotions out of the way, some other observations and points of note this weekend:

• Tile games are the modern-day golf for industry professionals

Friday night was the 4th tile hangout I’ve been invited to in the last two weeks. That’s on top of the RummiKlub LA event I was invited to through Blended Strategy Group’s Friendsgiving event in November. I feel like these Rummikub/Mahjong events have replaced what golf used to be (at least when it comes to entertainment/lifestyle industries). They’re a way for industry folks to socially connect in a light, abrasive-free environment. Drinks optional.

I was invited on Friday night by my friend Cam (fall party Cam for those who know what I’m talking about). She showed me the ropes of Rummikub, and I think I could actually hold my own in a bigger setting. We played in a small group on Friday, but it was the perfect environment to get the game down. She does a weekly Saturday AM Coffee + Kub event with her friends. There have been several Mahjong events either recently or in the pipeline. Cam warned me it’s way too complicated and to stick with Rummikub. So I’m fine with just one.

• I’ve been open to seeing movies—but they are all bad

I’ve seen more movies in the theater this year than I have in like all of my LA life. It’s fun to go with a close friend with the intention that if it sucks, you can laugh about it together. But on the same token, I would like to see something I actually enjoy. I find that these movies I’ve been seeing since January are either really bad/redundant from start to finish, or they start off exciting and then just linger on way too long. Most recently, last weekend I saw The Devil Wears Prada 2 with my mom as a belated Mother’s Day hang. I heard bad reviews, but I didn’t realize there would literally be no plot to follow. I did not retain one singular thing from that film. I thought for sure my mom would say otherwise, but no, she didn’t get it either. I couldn’t wait for it to be over.

On Saturday, after sharing that delicious plate of Panini Café (pictured above) with my friend Michael (that is our go-to spot), we decided to see Obsession at the Century City Mall. It actually got great reviews. I think it had potential, but it dove into the crux of the plot way too soon, and I would have appreciated some character development. It then lingered on redundantly throughout the remainder. The acting was fine, and the main girl was very pretty, but I wouldn’t recommend seeing it. Also, the setting was kind of depressing. I don’t know where it was supposed to take place, but it felt very drab which only added to the ickiness of the whole thing.

• Project Pride has a long way to go, but I’m determined to complete the mission

If you read my weekend debrief from last week, you likely saw that I’m on a mission to have my cluttered apartment in presentable form by June 6 (weho pride). OMG is that really only 10 days away? I’ve definitely made some progress, but you guyssss… there is a ways to go! I’m committed though. I mean it won’t be perfect by any means, but as long as I can create some kind of vibe in here with room for people to feel cozy, then I’m OK.

Anyway, long live the mellow weekend. I really wish I could relive it, TBH. I was really all about appreciating the little things these past few days, and it was such a fulfilling feeling. How do you feel about holiday weekends? Do they leave you feeling lonely, rested, bored, excited, productive? All of the above?

With that, I hope everyone was able to check at least something off their to-do list. I can’t believe this is the last week of May! Whoa. Have a great week ahead, everyone! <3

I had lunch with a highly skilled and credible journalist friend the other day. She was laid off in recent months, and it’s humbled her so deeply that I actually forgot how brag-worthy her bylines are. She’s taken extreme risks, unleashed groundbreaking news and the list goes on. But none of that matters when you get laid off, and suddenly your identity is your unemployment number.

Getting laid off in media (especially editorial) is often much less about a paycheck (because most of the time it’s small anyway), and much more about ego and credibility. Even in 2026, when more people than ever have segued into full-time freelance, or are still processing layoff PTSD, it doesn’t hit any less when you’re the one experiencing it.

Up until the last couple of years, I still dealt with the aftermath of a traumatizing layoff in 2014. And surprise! I’ve experienced additional layoffs since that fateful day. Nothing can prepare you for how your mind, body and personal network will react to the news. Regardless of whether the layoff was personal or an entire department was let go, the news can strip you of confidence, identity and courage to get back out there—all in the snap of a finger.

Because I’ve survived several media layoffs over the course of my 15+ career, I’m sharing my insider’s tips to recovering. I wish I had these tips (and encouragement) when I was going through it all. Feel free to pass this along to anyone who could use the added uplift.

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It’s been another bustling week, but with some out-of-the-box highlights. I guess I’ll start with the biggest: There was a full-fledged makeup event at Plan B, a strip club in my least favorite part of LA—Palms (#iykyk).

But, if there’s one thing about me, I lovvvveee a strip club. And the fact that Half Magic Beauty (shoutout Wally + Foundation PR) made this a professional setting for the night made me feel like I could embrace my true self. While the girls were not fully nude, everything else operated like business as usual (with a few added elements like a makeup artistry station and professional photos). But the rap music was blaring, the drinks were flowing and the vibes were vibing.

The event was to celebrate the makeup brand’s 4-year anniversary. For those who don’t know, the brand’s founder Donni Davy is the official makeup artist for Euphoria. And her brand was the signature line the cast wore on the show the first two seasons. Given the nature of the show, the strip club aspect made total sense. It was a really well-done event, pushing the envelope while still keeping it classy. Everyone had the best time. It went til like 11:30 p.m.

One thing especially interesting was being greeted with trays of Capri cigarettes as soon as we entered the space. While it could seem shocking, it’s actually part of a greater trend I’m noticing.

At the end of last year, Emi Jay had customizable lighters up for grabs, with cigarettes to accompany them at a hair perfume launch event. Then in December, The Only Agency (a leading talent agency for hair and makeup professionals) had full packs of cigarettes spread out throughout their holiday party with their logo listed on the packs. Just yesterday, I was listening to Kylie Jenner appear on a podcast, where she said, “Cigarettes are so back. Thank god I don’t have to hide it. Then in another clip she said, “I want a cigarette right now,” agreeing to smoke one with the podcast host after their wine-induced session was done. She make it clear she only smokes when she’s drunk or in Europe. I was out on Main St. in Santa Monica a week ago (I think this was my first-ever nighttime outing there) and people were smoking left and right. Young people.

The switch has been almost immediate. For a long time, cigarettes were very uncool. After all, vape culture in L.A. is so insanely huge. I’m actually shocked at how much people vape and how many people do it. I can proudly say I’ve never vaped in my life (but I’m admittedly guilty of loving a tipsy cigarette—blame the elder millennial in me). Had I not tried a cigarette when I was younger, I know I wouldn’t care about trying them today, which is probably why I couldn’t care less about vaping.

In productive news, I finally kicked off my clean apt Pride mission. My goal is to have my place (relatively) decluttered by Weho Pride weekend so I can have people over for my annual Pride Brunch. And right now, my place is the most cluttered it’s ever been. I feel blessed in ways. Like, it’s filled with stuff I’ve wanted forever. But it’s a lot of it. And I’ve talked many times before about how overwhelming it is. So I hired my friend Malery to help me. She’s really efficient with time and getting rid of unnecessary belongings. So we’ve done part 1, but I think we’ll need two more parts, so I’m praying to the Pride gods that we can get this done in time and dance to Chappell Roan.

Lastly, yesterday I had the honor of being invited to my friends Olivia and Natalie’s annual CA Winemasters event to support Cystic Fibrosis. This was my fourth year, and it’s at Warner Bros. Studios, featuring 50 of the country’s best restaurants and 70 premier California wineries. A bunch of my friends were there, so wine was flowing and run-ins were aplenty. Based on talking to certain people outside of this event, I think there’s still a bit of mystery around the genetic disease. For those unsure, CF is a chronic respiratory disease with no cure. This event helps raise money towards said cure. I always donate a portion of beauty products to be auctioned off with the hopes that it helps in some way. If you’ve ever heard of the movie Five Feet Apart, CF is the focus.

I’m in OC right now visiting my parents, so I’ll be spending the day here tomorrow. I plan to bring my laptop to one of the local Orange Hills coffee shops tomorrow and pretend I’m a college kid again. It’s crazy coming home single with no kids and casually working from a coffee shop only to see people from your high school walk in with the kids fresh from sports practice. It’s surreal.

Anyway! Wishing you all a great week ahead. Tell me something fun in the comments. PLEASE. ◡̈

I know I haven’t been as active on Substack lately, and I promise that’s going to change. I have like five half-written posts in my drafts, and I need to get those moving. There’s so much industry insight (and tea!) I want to share with you all, and I promise it’s coming.

I just got back from a truly last minute trip to Thailand, and I’m still processing the experience. I plan to do a deep-dive into press trips to offer more insight, but you know, each one hits a bit different. The last two especially (Thailand and Portland) really left me feeling things, for a multitude of reasons. Hats off to Katherine at Purple for making Thailand happen so quickly. I’m shocked at how seamless and organized everything was from beginning to end. My flight wasn’t officially booked until two days before I left! It was an approximate 20-hour travel day, but the flights were fine honestly. And I got to watch Little Miss Sunshine (a true classic) and I Love LA (it really made me laugh).

So, in case you’re wondering how this all came together… The Andaz One Bangkok was opening and there was going to be a big event for it. The decision to send out media was last minute, and since it’s such a long travel distance, they decided to extend the stay to another property. We got to choose between two. I chose The Standard Hua Hin. It was three hours from Bangkok. I’ve never felt more grounded on any property in my life.

How you feel about something isn’t directly about the way it looks, but how it makes you feel. I remember wrapping up sunrise yoga each morning and just looking up at the sky and out at the ocean and the trees, and feeling so clear. For all the moments in life that I’ve been lost, confused or disappointed, here I was in this otherworldly situation, taking in so many thoughts and feelings at once. It’s hard to go back to that specific moment in the grass on the mat without getting misty-eyed.

And then making our way to Bangkok three days later, it was a totally different experience, but a great one nonetheless. On both legs of the trip, one of the highlights was breakfast. Both places had insane breakfast buffets in stunning settings. In fact, you can see my floating breakfast moment in my pic below (from The Standard). We would start our days with the purest coconut water, followed by endless almond milk lattes. Then we’d follow it up with a swim, nature walk or ice bath/other wellness activity. At the Andaz, we got to attend the main opening event. It was so much fun! Everyone was so friendly. It was chic and lovely.

I’m pretty exhausted so I don’t have it in me to write more, but I didn’t want this weekend to go by without capturing the moment. I have lots more that I’ll be rolling out on IG and TikTok this week, so follow me over there if you aren’t already. Exciting week ahead with an Ava Phillippe fragrance event in the West Hollywood Hills, a staycation at Shutters in Santa Monica and a Lion Pose nighttime event at a private residence in Santa Monica. I will keep you guys posted on all things. In the meantime, happy MAY (whoa!).

**ALSO… if you work with any hotels that have gone from party/social scene and segued into attracting a wellness/beauty-focused crowd, please let me know. I’m noticing a global trend and I want to tap into that.

PSA: The emails are getting out of hand!

Listen, I get it… there’s so much going around that the follow-ups make sense. I’m always OK with one follow-up (mayyyybe two, depending on the context). That’s communication 101. One follow-up can potentially be helpful. I may have marked unread and meant to go back later, but ended up forgetting. Or I may be on the fence about replying, and rely on your follow-up to make my decision for me. Or maybe I don’t care at all, but your follow-up is still accepted and respected.

Then we get into the triple, quadruple follow-up emails. That’s not OK. Here’s what I can tell you… If I see an email I’m genuinely interested in, you’ll hear from me within 48 hours (unless my OOO is on). Six follow-ups later will not change my mind.

Ok, so, follow-ups are one thing, but this email I received yesterday as I was wrapping up a quiet little visit to the Century City Mall was unhinged. I’m going to share the email—in its raw form, so you may want to keep reading—as a reminder of what not to do!

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Before getting into the chaos that recently ensued, I’m going to share a personal anecdote from my own professional career. You’ll understand the relevance of this reflection as we dive deeper into this post, and hopefully you can learn from it, too.

A year-and-a-half into my prestigious editorial assistant job at E! Online (an experience I truly loved), I let my emotions and ego get the best of me. I was at a bi-annual event, dealing with a particular publicist and her team, who acted disrespectfully during each of our interactions. It wasn’t just me. It was all of us eager little reporters trying to squeeze into this one particular event after our red carpet duties were done. We had pre-approved access inside, but the publicist and her team made things difficult.

At this point in time, the other red carpet regulars and I were used to the same publicists we’d see at all the same events. We knew who would welcome us with open arms, and we knew who wanted us on the red carpet only. This was a unique situation because we were granted inside access, yet the barriers to entry were wild. Most publicists (aside from the big A-list events that were guaranteed coverage with or without onsite press) wanted media inside ASAP. They were much hungrier and desperate those days to get coverage any way they could (mind you, this was before TikTok, IG and instant virality). So when this publicist and her team scoffed at us, we were naturally taken aback.

I was livid. Does she know who I am?!, I thought, head held high, definitely thinking I was the ultimate boss b*tch. Umm, it was more like did I know who she was. I did, but I didn’t care. I didn’t think about how my dealings with her (on or offsite) would affect me in the future. So what came next was wild. We did finally get into the coveted event, but when the wider PR team (that oversees the event) followed up on Monday to see how things went (follow-ups are totally normal), I made it clear that my boss and I would NEVER work with ::insert publicist:: again.

The reaction from the wider team? Shocked. If my memory serves me, I’m pretty sure the response was something like, “Noted, are you sure you want that message relayed?” Without thinking, I said “Yep!”

You see, this wasn’t just a “publicist”—this was a very powerful media figure. She was also a talent manager, a digital producer and I believe her husband was super powerful, too. I honestly don’t remember all of her details, just the impact.

Within minutes of pressing that send button, my boss called me into his office. Mind you, up to this point, I was a pretty well-behaved, do-as-instructed assistant. I totally messed up. He definitely yelled. I definitely deserved it. And he was right—like why was I making decisions on his behalf?! I totally should have brought this situation to his attention in person, or had a more mature response for the wider PR team.

I wrote a follow-up to the greater PR team and apologized. What came next was the unexpected… a phone call from the main publicist herself. You guys, I’ve probably never been so intimidated on a call in my life. I had to scoot away to another side of the office so no one would hear me. I remember her berating me, but I think we ended on cordial terms. I apologized profusely and she said I seemed genuinely sorry and understood the magnitude of my actions.

We haven’t crossed paths in years because I no longer work in entertainment—but I know for sure she recognized me the rare times I’d see her around. And I could feel her energy from across the room. Those moments are forgiven but they’re not forgotten.

All these years later, I’m not above sending an assertive email or standing up against unprofessionalism. But I think things through. I think through whether this is truly, genuinely a relationship worth risking. I think about whether my email could backfire against me in any way. I think about the bullet points and whether I have enough information to truly back up my argument and 100% stand by it. And, of course, am I affecting anyone else in the process of my correspondence?

Last week, I saw a similar situation play out in front of me. Someone I thought fondly of (personally and professionally) dug herself in a hole after I put her in touch with a potential employer. I was blindsided by how the situation spiraled. I’m sharing the story here because it’s a reminder to stop and think before you hit send. With just one click, she burned a bridge with someone in her industry, while losing my trust and willingness to ever recommend her for something in the future. And, at the very end, there’s actually a twist!

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It’s probably rare to come back from Miami feeling refreshed, but my eight-night solo trip at the end of March was actually quite tame. The last time I visited was in 2023 for my milestone birthday. This time was a completely different vibe. I was flown out with two different brands (what are the odds?!), and with a few days in between trips, the brands agreed to put me up in hotels. So I was basically on a solo vacation. Also, these two brand experiences were extremely chill, which was also part of why I returned feeling refreshed.

Before I get into the brand experiences, I’ll share details about my general time there. It was really nice to explore town and see different areas and just enjoy some me time, catch up on work, mental health, all the things. I had breakfast at the stunning Four Seasons with Alex from Purple, excitedly met up with my mom’s cousin who I hadn’t seen in 20 years, enjoyed a hosted dinner at Otto & Pepe and checked off a major bucket list milestone: kayaking to raccoon island.

I also love the style in Miami. Because I had so much extra time to take everything in, I really picked up on the fun colors and prints that everyone wears. Clean girl aesthetic, who? There’s so much life to Miami and things to do. Obviously LA is my home and heart, but Miami is definitely an exciting thrill.

On the days when I didn’t have plans, I mostly just hung out and went on walks. My friend Yana was in town from NYC, so on the final night, she, me and my friend Richard (who did PR for the second leg of the trip) hit up Soho House and this other super fun bar. We ended up hanging out with these fun German soccer players. Did I make my 8 a.m. nonstop flight home? No. Was getting home at 5pm after a layover in ATL worth it? Yes.

The first part of my trip was with Lincoln (yes, the car). And if you’re thinking huh?, let me explain… They had a partnership with mindbodygreen, which was hosting a really cute wellness event in the Coconut Grove section of Miami (an area I hadn’t been prior). It was beautiful and refreshing. Lincoln has also partnered with the Calm app to offer a full-on sensorial meditative experience in their latest SUV models. FWIW, I’ve always been a huge fan of Lincoln SUVs. I was obsessed with Escalades in college (hip-hop culture infiltrated my whole life), but when I first rode in a Navigator, I was like wow, this is luxury. Therefore it really was a full circle moment to be invited on their behalf.

Bottom line, Lincoln really wants to tap into the beauty and wellness space. The brand doesn’t do many partnerships and they want to be associated with that side of things. The Lincoln team was great. So professional and very sweet and welcoming. It was just me and them. Our event ended at 2pm, and then the Lincoln publicist and I grabbed a bite and then we both went our separate ways. I couldn’t believe I had so much time to myself.

After a few free days, the second half of my trip began with Carroten, a brand of natural tanning enhancers. Between the tanning brand and the luxury SUV brand, I felt like these opportunities were made for me. So perfect. Much like with Lincoln, there wasn’t anything aggressive expected of me on the Carroten trip. We had a yummy Italian dinner at Avra, got a massage at the St. Regis, went to the Miami Open (Carroten had a giant suite) and checked out this hot new restaurant in Bal Harbour.

One of the biggest highlights of Miami was staying at the Sunny Hotel (in Sunny Isles, slightly off the beaten path - 25 minutes from South Beach). The hotel is two months old and had so much bright, lively character. There was also a cute little snack shack on the premises, and an outdoor bar and dining area by the pool. The hotel also was connected to the beach, so everything was at your fingertips once you were there. Ahhh and the rooms, omg don’t get me started. It was such an uplifting experience getting to stay there.

So anyway, Miami was a success. No ELEVEN which I’ve gotta do next time, butttt a time well had.

Gifting Suites + Events Galore

As soon as I got back into town, it was Coachella prep to the max. I say this as someone who lives vicariously through the perks (not the Coachella madness itself). I attended the annual ICA suite, which is pretty much a who’s-who of influencers and lifestyle/beauty journalists. Thankfully, Amanda Lauren was invited, so we plowed through it together after fueling up with Starbucks. I got these really cute leopard moccasin-type shoes and I’m def excited to wear them with the L’Agence denim shorts I walked away with.

Next up was the Michele Marie PR Coachella suite. I had just gotten a facial at Formula Fig, so I was nervous walking in and having to see people with nothing but sunnies to save me. Thankfully I got there at the tail-end and it was a very in-and-out experience. I appreciated the organization. They had a curated bag ready for me in no time. I snagged these really funky 4ccccees sandals among many other things. I’m excited to wear them. They’re pink and chunky and fun.

There was also a Fenty Beauty suite at one of my fav hotels, La Peer. I snagged some skin tints and a personalized brush engraved with skye (iykyk). I also hit up a MAC lip glass event this week. OMG so first off, MAC is the best. I feel so honored when they invite me (it’s only been my second time). They gifted me their whole new lip glass collection WITH liners. It was a reminder that MAC really is that girl. My new lip combo is so elite I could not be happier. Then next week there’s a Bollare suite on Tues, and I got invited to a True Religion suite on Wed (which I’m kind of curious about for nostalgia sake), but I will be on the other side of town that day and will have to miss.

This week was actually super busy. There was also a Rare Beauty foundation launch party with Selena (if you’re interested in the topic of product packaging (namely accessible packaging), I gained insight from Rare’s chief brand officer Joyce Kim. I think this is truly an interesting read.

Speaking of Coachella, again, I am not going (trust me, I’ll have more JOMO than FOMO), but yes it feels just as popular as ever. As I’ve gotten older, I’m just not down with crowds and lines anymore. Even if I get invited for free, it doesn’t make it not a schlep, ya know? That said, I put together this awesome list of unique festival fits in case you need a last minute find. I also interviewed a handful of founders about the importance of social-first dressing during this time of year, and how that plays into what they create or carry at the stores.

Capped off the busy week with a bday bash for longtime friend Allison McNamara (founder of MARA Beauty). She rented out the upper level of Alba restaurant (great spot I’ve been to several times) and it was a lot of fun catching up with some old friends (Hi Candice, if you’re reading this!). Candice and I spent the night talking about age and feeling empowered as we get older—even without a husband or some of the things society deems “important.” Both of us are in really uplifting places in our lives, and it’s a reminder that it’s OK and possible to be happy without checking every box.

Anyway, with that I hope you all have a great week! I am tiredddd but my reiki healer is coming over tomorrow in exchange for beauty products (gotta love a good trade, amirite? ;)), so I have that to look forward to. Also, I’ll be spilling major tea this week (this story is bonkers!), so come back later. Love you guys! <3

Bear with me guys! This debrief is a culmination of gathered tidbits over the last few weeks. I’ve been meaning to update, but the Sundays have come and gone. Anyway, I’m excited to finally catch up with you.

I was in Carlsbad, CA earlier this week. More on that in a bit, but first we must recap wellness week in Scottsdale—something I’m still reaping the benefits from. I spent four nights between Civana Wellness Resort + Spa, and the Four Seasons Scottsdale. I have to say, visiting a real desert is a lot different than driving through the Inland Empire or Vegas. While Palm Springs and Palm Desert (hence the name) do have real desert elements, it’s nothing like a trip to Arizona. It’s definitely way too suburban for me to live there, but these resorts were so grounding and these saguaro cactuses were sooo cute. Totally worth a visit for a mind and body reset.

I brought Bianca as my +1 for an individual trip hosted by Experience Scottsdale. The trip was so expertly planned out. Every aspect met my needs, while also being given ample time to get work done and enjoy the properties. This particular trip was laid out perfectly: I got to stay at two resorts of my choice (as long as they were in the Scottsdale area) and then once onsite, I could pick activities. Especially at Civana—a wellness resort that offers personal workshops, workouts and sound healing—it was great that I got to pick and choose based on my own preferences. As I laid under the sky during the second night’s sound bath, I had this moment of calm and clarity. I also got to experience the absolutely exquisite Civana spa, and received an Ayurvedic Revive to Thrive massage.

As we moved on to the Four Seasons, it was really about taking in the ambiance. The plants were aplenty, and it felt so peaceful walking through nature. I received an incredible Hydrafacial, but I wouldn’t call the spa a standout at this property. It’s much more about the overall resort experience and the relaxation it brings. The pool was spacious and open 24 hours, while the service was top-notch, and there were places all over the hotel to plop down and relax (same for Civana). There’s also a built-in hiking path to Pinnacle Peak. We got up early and met additional hotel hikers for a 2.5-hour hike up the mountain. Ok, we did not make it to the tippy top, but we did our fair time and we really enjoyed it.

The Scottsdale trip was my most relaxing in a long time. When I’m in LA, I’m not a fan of the sun, but when you’re on a trip, it’s different. And for some reason, it’s very rare for me to get sun when I’m traveling. Literally anywhere I go, it’s not sunny. But then I come back to LA and it’s 90. Sigh. The Scottsdale weather was perfect, hence why I was encouraged to come at this time.

When I got back to LA, I had an enriching week. Perhaps the Scottsdale magic followed me home because I felt light and uplifted with so many exciting personal and professional opportunities on my agenda.

I tried LEKFIT for the first time, as well as Burn LA. LEKFIT is owned by a Tracy Anderson alum, so she leads the class similarly (no vocal coaching, along with movements that resemble Tracy’s). There is a trampoline (rebounder) element to the class, which I enjoy. It’s a great cardio workout, which is nice because that’s not my strong suit. Some of the Tracy-esque moves were a little complicated. But overall a solid workout. I felt great after and tried Sycamore Kitchen for the first time post-class.

Burn LA was amazing. It was intense but easy to follow. While yes, there’s a mat, it’s not a pilates class. There are a few pilates elements, but I would call it a little bit of everything. The class I took kicked off with small arm movements, and whoa those will get you. Ever since writing my Substack on arms as status symbols, I’m on a mission to status-fy arms. So yeah, in my fit era. So if anyone wants to do a workout or works with an LA studio, please let me know!

Ok, I also filmed a podcast last week! This was really exciting because it was with Melinda Solares, the beauty director of Sephora. I know, pinch me. Her podcast is called The Beauty Manifest, and she’s hosted everyone from Shani Darden to Amy Liu and the list goes on. While she brings the beauty community together, she aims to take a mental health spin on each episode. I think it went really well. We talked for an hour and I felt really comfortable in her presence. Posting on TikTok for a couple years has really helped my speaking skills and confidence opening up about various topics. I mean I’m not oversharing by any means (I can’t bring myself to do that), but I’m having meaningful conversations about things I’m not ashamed (or too private about) to discuss. I’ll share more soon!

Something I’ve been thinking about lately is how I no longer have a signature scent. It’s weird because I’ve always made that a priority. It still is, but nothing resonates with me longterm. I’ve tried seriously everything. Some scents I’ll be obsessed with for a day or two and then I never want to smell them again. Others just make me sick. And then I’m over all my old-school tried-and-trues. I mean I still have a soft spot, but I don’t think I could wear them today. The only OG fragrance I continue running to in a pinch is the original Chanel Chance. I layer it with the Sol de Janeiro Bum Bum Cream, and it creates this alluring, universally appealing aroma that always scores me compliments in the Uber. But even so, it’s not feeling as exciting to me. It still gets the job done, but I want something cutting-edge and unique. I want to be stopped on the street.

I do love Guerlain scents a lot. They are definitely head-turners. I don’t own my favorite one (Pêche Mirage), only a sample. I don’t know anyone else who wears it, so I could make it mine. I would just need to buy a $400 bottle which I don’t plan to do any time soon. I do have my second favorite Guerlain scent (Neroli Outrenoir) in a medium travel size, but I go through phases of loving it more times than others. So if anyone has any favorite scents I should try, shout them out in the comments!

Welp, we’re only into mid-March and I already fired my new therapist lady. We’d been chatting since end of January, and things were going ok. For a while there (and by a while, I mean like three weeks), I thought she was chill. She was WAY different from me, but I selected her at random through the options provided by my insurance. And things were going OK. But what I realized (as is the case with every other therapist I’ve ever experienced) is that they do not understand what’s not in their textbook idea of what people need help with. I don’t want to be that I’m-so-self-aware girl, but also… I do feel like these therapists panic when a client understands themself more than they’re used to.

You know how we can get the ick about someone we’re dating or getting to know as a friend? Well, that very thing happened with therapist lady. She tried to insist that my answer to something SHE asked ME about was inaccurate. And then kept pressing me about something that added zero value to our conversation. I finally said, “If you keep pressing me about this, we’re going to have a problem.” It wasn’t because I was avoidant about the issue—it was because the issue didn’t exist. She was trying to create issues because our conversation was pretty light that week. She should have instead focused on things I’d suggested to begin with. As soon as I got off our call, I knew right then I was over it. So no therapy for now. Luckily, I’m in a good place at the moment, but I do think it’s healthy to have a sounding board. Well, preferably one who actually understands you.

Moving on from that (#RIP), let’s get into my stay in Carlsbad. Visit Carlsbad reached out about sending me on a media visit and I happily obliged. Fun fact: One summer break in college, I came home and my best friend Sheryl bought a used Volkswagon Golf from someone in Carlsbad. We had never been, but we made the trek out there and we were obsessed. From that point on, we swore that’s where we’d live once we graduated. Umm, guess how many times we went back to visit since. LOLLLLL. So yeah, this was my Carlsbad reunion. And I must say, it still lived up to what I remembered.

I stayed for three nights. The first was at this new spot called Hotel Solea. It was cute, clean and quaint, but more for the Legoland guest and less for someone who wants a legit hotel experience. But next we went on to Omni La Costa Resort + Spa, and that was my speed. It was grounding the way those Scottsdale properties felt. I loved it. Our room was a bit dated (they’ve been renovating the overall property the last couple years), but it actually had a really cute charm and I ended up being into it. I brought Michael for two nights, and Andreya for one. Michael and I stumbled upon our coveted waterslides on property, while Andreya and I did a crazy cold plunge at Breathe Degrees wellness studio. I also got a Fire & Ice facial at the hotel spa, and I actually noticed a difference.

On Tuesday I leave for a very short trip back to Colorado for a sauna summit. I honestly have no idea what to expect except we’re doing dinner at Michelin-starred restaurant Bosq in Aspen one night. But as far as the summit itself is concerned, stay tuned!

Speaking of travel, ummm why did my Idyllwild vlog go viral? Like, of everything I post, how did this one get more than 250K views? And not only that, but I’ve actually noticed a follower increase, too, which hasn’t happened much on previous viral content. So, even though my editorial coverage didn’t work out, I got something out of it anyway!! Thanks Idy. ;)

As soon as I got back from Carlsbad, it was back to the hustle and bustle of LA. Good things, but bustling nonetheless. A highlight? Making a bold statement at the Charlotte Tilbury garden soirée at the Beverly Hills Hotel. What an experience!

I realize this post is all over the place. That’s what happens when you try to cram a month’s worth of thoughts into one Substack. With that, I hope everyone has a great week ahead! Thanks as always for reading ◡̈ .

We all want what we can’t have, amirite? And that’s the notion behind “hidden” or “strategic” friction. Much of it is real, and much of it is pure hype. Unsure what I’m talking about? Let me explain…

What Is ‘Friction Marketing’?

When it comes to a hot commodity like a specific Rare Beauty blush for example (I mostly write about beauty, so that’s an example that comes to mind), pretty much anyone can obtain the popular product. Even if it’s sold out at Sephora, it can likely be found on the brand’s website or another retailer. At the very least, it can be pre-ordered for a quick restock.

But then you have these mysterious “waitlists” or “sold-out” alerts for products that either haven’t launched yet or just launched one day prior. Sometimes it totally makes sense based on the brand’s ongoing popularity (remember the Stanley craze? Yeah, I blocked it out, too)—and sometimes it feels very out of nowhere. In the case of Stanley, for example, we saw in real time how (inexplicably) desperate consumers were for the product. A sold-out waitlist totally tracked. But even so, you don’t think the manufacturers went into it anticipating how many people would clamor for this product? Of course they did. Sure, there are genuine moments where something unexpectedly sells out. But most of the time, it’s all part of a marketing plan.

At the end of last year, I interviewed someone who partnered with a beauty brand to launch her own limited edition collection. The collection sold out overnight. This isn’t too shocking, considering this person has a massive following, as does the brand. The kicker, however, is, how many products were actually available to begin with? The brand declined to comment when I asked. Ok, fair. But it supports my point that anyone can slap a “sold-out”/“join the [crazy number]-person waiting list” notification under a product.

The Relevance of ‘Friction Maxxing’ in 2026

Generally speaking, customer experience and transactional ease have consistently been viewed as key brand pillars. In 2026, however, an intentional shift is expected. Now, this doesn’t mean customer care calls should be dropped or returns should be faulty. But you may notice less accessibility to the things you want.

“We are currently in an engagement recession,” TikTok creator (@mirandadoesbrands) told her 33,000 followers in January. “People don’t like and comment on social media anymore, and it’s becoming harder for brands to make people care about them. This is partly because when everything is too easy, too available and there are no barriers to entry, there’s no reason to pay attention. It’s basic psychology that the harder you make something, the more people want it.”

Shanahan then references sustainable fragrance brand Ffern, whose products sell out each time, despite the drawing consumers have to enter before buying a seasonal drop. Meanwhile, Rolex denies Daytona purchases from anyone who hasn’t met a minimum spend threshold.

“I think we’re going to see a lot more of this,” Shanahan goes on to say. “Brands gatekeeping access and making customers jump through certain hoops. As AI makes everything more instantaneous and accessible, friction is going to become a key way to signal something has value.”

TikTok brand strategist (@eugbrandstrat) acknowledges social media’s “cultural oversaturation of luxury products,” explaining to his 197,000 followers, “Even if these things are physically scarce, they’re culturally ubiquitous … It doesn’t really matter what the price is.”

Ultimately, he says, “Status is derived from things that are inaccessible to the majority of the population. So the new status symbols can’t be things that are compressed into the visual realm. They have to be behavioral.”

This ties into my Substack thesis from last week that stated toned, slender arms are the status symbol for women in 2026. Why? Something quoted in my Substack said, “They imply the ability to spend time and money training at the gym, on pilates classes, and on a diet involving $20 protein shakes. It shows that you have stamina, disposable income and—perhaps most importantly—agency over your schedule.⁠”

While GLP-1s (and non-surgical size 2 bodies), for example, are accessible to everyone, a fit physique is not. There are many barriers to arms toned just right. Those arms reveal much more about a person than an instantly gratifying flashy handbag or new car.

The ‘Friction Maxxing’ Blueprint

Hermès invented friction marketing, and definitely not in a “hidden” or “strategic” way. The fashion house’s barrier to entry when it comes to purchasing a coveted Birkin or Kelly bag (approximately $12,000 - $17,000 in-store) is upfront and apparent. A customer’s ability to earn a bag is determined by their genuine dedication to the brand (aka spending on other items in the store) and the impression they give off to their designated sales associate.

“It often can come down to how much and how often you’re willing to purchase,” says Lexi Mapile-Hawkins, who recently underwent the process successfully with her husband. “Are you genuinely shopping because you’re a fan of the brand, or just doing it with a goal of purchasing a bag? Sometimes the SAs are super transparent and may encourage you to shop from ready-to-wear women’s or men’s, fine jewelry or housewares, to build a true affinity for the brand. Ultimately, it comes down to the sales associate.”

Mapile-Hawkins continues, “I’ve heard of instances where people are spending a lot of money and then they aren’t getting anything yet, so I think it depends on the purchaser’s personality and demeanor. Do they seem demanding? If an SA feels like someone’s a genuine person and a fan of the brand, it’s likely they’ll be more excited to help because they think someone would truly genuinely enjoy it. Everyone wants to buy a bag. But your approach is key to a successful shopping experience and relationship.”

During the process, Mapile-Hawkins opened up to her sales associate about her new mommy milestone, while talking about work and the highs and lows of everyday life. She also truly got to know her SA as well, building a relationship akin to any normal shopping companion.

“It’s really almost like you’re making a new friend,” explains the longtime PR pro and LA native. “So you’re saying like, hey friend, I am obsessed with this! And if the relationship is growing you may get an I’m going to get you as soon as I see your wishlist item come in. Often, the biggest obstacle can be time, so shoppers keep buying time or speed it up by buying things to show seriousness about a purchase.”

The next obstacle is universal—scarcity of product.

“Some people will be like, OK, I want the most desirable Birkin size and most desirable neutral colors,” Mapile-Hawkins explains. “If you want something so commonly asked for, it’ll be harder to obtain because it won’t be as readily available—versus a request for whatever color, size and hardware.”

For Los Angeles lawyer Jessica (who chose to keep her last name private), she created a three-bag wishlist once she connected with her sales associate. Her situation went a bit smoother because she was referred to her SA by a friend.

Echoing Mapile-Hawkins sentiments, Jessica explains, “The relationship with your sales associate is super important because they go to bat for you when a bag you want comes into the store. Hermès wants to give their bags to people who truly appreciate the brand because they know there are so many resellers out there.”

The Beverly Hills native notes the importance of treating your SA “like a romantic partner you want to keep happy,” adding, “They do love giving you bags for special occasions like birthdays or holidays.”

Ultimately, Jessica ended up with her three bags and is extremely pleased with her purchases. “I love them,” she says. “They’re super classic and coveted.”

While some could say the Hermès purchasing play is pretentious, I think more brands can implement this plan to maintain status. To be clear, I do not own either bag, but I find their system fascinating and unique. Do I think this system is a fit for every brand? No. But do I think there are other ways to implement friction or barriers to entry? One TikTok user brought up The Ordinary skincare, and noted that while their products are jaw-droppingly affordable, they’re also complicated. If you don’t understand how to use them, you could burn your face. She noted that this attracts a more experienced or passionate skincare consumer.

What are your thoughts? And have you witnessed this marketing tactic without realizing it?