<script data-pm-proxy="intercept"></script><?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/" xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/" xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom" version="2.0" xmlns:itunes="http://www.itunes.com/dtds/podcast-1.0.dtd" xmlns:googleplay="http://www.google.com/schemas/play-podcasts/1.0"><channel><title><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></title><description><![CDATA[Self-help for smart people. ]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com</link><image><url>https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!0HGW!,w_256,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fda15845d-e27c-4be6-a82a-31699891fb54_1280x1280.png</url><title>Dan Harris</title><link>https://danharris.substack.com</link></image><generator>Substack</generator><lastBuildDate>Tue, 01 Sep 2026 14:25:03 GMT</lastBuildDate><atom:link href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/feed" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml"/><copyright><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></copyright><language><![CDATA[en]]></language><webMaster><![CDATA[danharris@substack.com]]></webMaster><itunes:owner><itunes:email><![CDATA[danharris@substack.com]]></itunes:email><itunes:name><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></itunes:name></itunes:owner><itunes:author><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></itunes:author><googleplay:owner><![CDATA[danharris@substack.com]]></googleplay:owner><googleplay:email><![CDATA[danharris@substack.com]]></googleplay:email><googleplay:author><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></googleplay:author><itunes:block><![CDATA[Yes]]></itunes:block><item><title><![CDATA[Do this to unlock a cascade of healthy habits]]></title><description><![CDATA[How to make a &#8220;keystone habit&#8221;]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/do-this-to-unlock-a-cascade-of-healthy</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/do-this-to-unlock-a-cascade-of-healthy</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 31 Aug 2026 11:03:28 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!9kZh!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F5dc82069-771e-4ec1-8b22-09ef58640929_600x300.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>If you struggle to boot up healthy habits like meditation, reading, or sleep hygiene, I recently heard about what could be a powerful unlock. It&#8217;s called a &#8220;keystone habit,&#8221; a habit that sets off a cascade of other healthy habits.</span></p><p><span>For many people, exercise can be a keystone habit. It can boost sleep, mood, and eating patterns. Knock that domino over and lots of good shit happens.</span></p><p><span>But of course, exercise can be hard for a lot of people. In my experience, there&#8217;s an even easier and more impactful keystone habit: self-compassion. Which, put simply, is the ability to talk to yourself the way you would talk to a good friend.</span></p><p><span>It&#8217;s not time-consuming, it&#8217;s not expensive, you can do it on the fly. Anytime you notice yourself suffering, use that as an alarm bell that triggers you to say to yourself whatever you would say to somebody you care about. If you want to supercharge it, you can even put your hand on your heart. Which, I know, corny. But nobody has to see you doing this.</span></p><p><span>Moreover, the </span><strong><a href="https://self-compassion.org/wp-content/uploads/2023/01/Neff-2023.pdf"><span>evidence for this strategy is strong</span></a></strong><span>. Self-compassion has lots of benefits, including reduced stress and improved relationships. But in my experience, it can also act as a keystone habit. Research shows people who practice self-compassion are more motivated to improve after setbacks. Having your own back helps you get through all of the inevitable ups and downs of habit formation.</span></p><p><span>How do you find the keystone habit that works best for you? I recently interviewed </span><strong><a href="https://charlesduhigg.com/"><span>Charles Duhigg</span></a></strong><span>, who wrote the mega bestseller, </span><em><span>The Power of Habit</span></em><span>. He had interesting advice: Look for a change that makes you somewhat anxious.</span></p><p><span>What does he mean by that? If you&#8217;re contemplating a new habit that challenges your identity, that&#8217;s probably a good sign. If, for example, you&#8217;ve long told yourself a story that you&#8217;re not an exerciser, then launching a modest exercise habit might be simultaneously scary and beneficial. Same if you are someone who prides yourself on being a self-flagellating perfectionist. Maybe in that case, self-compassion is the right move. Because once you change your story about yourself, that can bleed into so many aspects of your life.</span></p><p><span>For my full conversation with Charles Duhigg&#8212;including an exchange where he walks me through my bedtime procrastination problem&#8212; </span><strong><a href="https://youtu.be/8sKdzm3f-68"><span>check out this week&#8217;s episode</span></a></strong><span>.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://youtu.be/8sKdzm3f-68" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!9kZh!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, 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/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!9kZh!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F5dc82069-771e-4ec1-8b22-09ef58640929_600x300.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>Looking to build or enhance your self-compassion muscle, check out <strong><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app">my app</a></strong>. I&#8217;ve got a whole library of guided meditations &#8212; many of them on this topic &#8212; from the world&#8217;s greatest teachers, live teacher-led sessions, my podcast without the ads, and real people to practice with. Life is better in the carpool lane. (Introverts, no trust falls required &#8212; camera off is fine.)</p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships"><span>Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app</span></a></p><p></p><p><strong>In-person Event Alert:</strong> On Sunday, October 4th, I&#8217;ll be joining renowned meditation teachers <strong>Sharon Salzberg</strong> and <strong>Joseph Goldstein</strong> for a <strong><a href="https://www.nyimc.org/event/benefit-2026/">special live conversation </a><a href="https://us.list-manage.com/33JBtwaPR_K?e=82b82558c1&amp;c2id=84e82af0fddfac2c560436f80b717d26https://us.list-manage.com/33JBtwaPR_K?e=82b82558c1&amp;c2id=84e82af0fddfac2c560436f80b717d26">at Symphony Space</a> </strong>in NYC<strong>. </strong>We'll talk about compassion, fear, overwhelm, the whole mess of living through times like these, filtered through over a century of combined meditation practice. It's a benefit for New York Insight Meditation Center, so your ticket helps keep meditation and Buddhist teachings accessible across NYC and beyond. <strong><a href="https://www.nyimc.org/event/benefit-2026/">Click here for tickets</a> &#8212; </strong>you can join us in-person or virtually. (Under 30? Email <strong><a href="mailto:youngadults@nyimc.org">youngadults@nyimc.org</a></strong> for a free code.) </p><p>                                     <em>Enjoying this newsletter? Send it to a friend.</em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/do-this-to-unlock-a-cascade-of-healthy?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/do-this-to-unlock-a-cascade-of-healthy?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share"><span>Share</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em>And please check out our new <a href="http://danharris.com/">website</a> and consider following us on <a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TenPercentHappier">YouTube</a>.</em></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Science of Habit Change, Why GLP-1s are Disrupting It, and How To Use It To Have Better Conversations | Charles Duhigg]]></title><description><![CDATA[There's a three-part framework for analyzing, breaking, or building any habit. There's also a simple way to identify which ones might be "keystone habits" for you.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-habit-change-why-glp</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-habit-change-why-glp</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 31 Aug 2026 07:02:40 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/212911665/4d0e7a7c9224b416a4b5575c65d2bd5e.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>The surprising discovery of the GLP1 &#8220;habit window&#8221; suggests that some people may be benefiting more from the drugs than others.</p><p>Charles Duhigg is a Pulitzer prize-winning journalist and the author of The Power of Habit, which spent over three years on bestseller lists and has been translated into 40 languages; Supercommunicators, also a bestseller published in 2024; and Smarter Faster Better, a third bestseller. Mr. Duhigg writes for The New Yorker magazine and is a graduate of Yale University and the Harvard Business School. He previously wrote for The New York Times, and is a frequent contributor to CNBC, This American Life, NPR, and Frontline. He was also, for one terrifying day in 1999, a bike messenger in San Francisco.</p><p>In this episode we talk about:</p><ul><li><p>The cue-routine-reward framework that underlies every habit, good or bad</p></li><li><p>The &#8220;golden rule&#8221; of habit change</p></li><li><p>What &#8220;keystone habits&#8221; are and how to identify them in your own life</p></li><li><p>Charles&#8217;s 45-pound weight loss on a GLP-1 and what it revealed about &#8220;food noise&#8221;</p></li><li><p>The GLP-1 &#8220;habit window,&#8221; and why some people may benefit from GLP-1&#8217;s more than others</p></li><li><p>Kitchen-sinking: the habit where a fight about one thing becomes a fight about everything</p></li><li><p>Meta-conversations: asking your partner what they actually need before you respond</p></li></ul><p>Related Episodes:</p><ul><li><p><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-science-of-effective-communication-charles-duhigg/id1087147821?i=1000646044674">The Science of Effective Communication | Charles Duhigg</a></p></li><li><p><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/weighing-the-extraordinary-benefits-and-disturbing/id1087147821?i=1000658657702">Weighing The Extraordinary Benefits And Disturbing Risks Of The New Weight Loss Drugs | Johann Hari</a></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Sara Bareilles On: Songs That Write Themselves, Grief That Doesn't Destroy You, and Why There's Nothing To Fix]]></title><description><![CDATA[Plus: her complicated relationship with antidepressants, weathering fertility struggles, and aging in public.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/sara-bareilles-on-songs-that-write</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/sara-bareilles-on-songs-that-write</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 28 Aug 2026 07:01:06 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/212900605/d277104159e06b9f0eddfb332600956b.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://sarabmusic.com/"><span>Sara Bareilles</span></a><span> joins Dan to discuss her new album </span><em><span>Good Grief</span></em><span>, a record she made after losing three close friends &#8212; Chad Joseph, Gavin Creel, and poet Andrea Gibson. The conversation covers grief as a transformative force, medication and mental health, fertility struggles and miscarriage, the creative process as spiritual transmission, aging without intervention, and patriotism as grief.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>Grief is a shortcut to the truth &#8212; it strips away distraction and forces presence</span></p></li><li><p><span>&#8220;Name it to tame it&#8221; &#8212; putting feelings into words reduces their power</span></p></li><li><p><span>Sara&#8217;s fear that medication would suppress her artistry turned out to be the opposite: Lexapro felt like &#8220;a return to herself&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>The creative process as clearing a channel rather than owning the output &#8212; music arrives, it isn&#8217;t manufactured</span></p></li><li><p><span>&#8220;Nothing to fix&#8221; &#8212; acceptance as a countercultural act in an era of optimization</span></p></li><li><p><span>Acceptance isn&#8217;t resignation &#8212; you can surrender to what is and still take compassionate action</span></p></li><li><p><span>Grief of country: loving America and mourning what it&#8217;s becoming aren&#8217;t mutually exclusive</span></p></li><li><p><span>Social media distorts your experience of reality &#8212; have your experience of the world </span><em><span>in</span></em><span> the world</span></p></li></ul><p><span>Sara Bareilles is a two-time Grammy winner and Tony-nominated composer whose music and lyrics powered the Broadway hit </span><em><span>Waitress</span></em><span> &#8212; a role she later performed herself, both on Broadway and in London&#8217;s West End. On screen, she earned an Emmy nomination for </span><em><span>Girls5eva</span></em><span> and for her performance as Mary Magdalene in NBC&#8217;s </span><em><span>Jesus Christ Superstar Live!</span></em><span> She has sold over three million albums and 3.5 billion streams worldwide.</span></p><p><strong><span>Related Episodes:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><a href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/sara-bareilles-anxiety-anger-and-567?r=4o5o&amp;utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&amp;utm_medium=web"><span>Sara Bareilles: Anxiety, Anger and Art</span></a><span> (2021)</span></p></li><li><p><a href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-find-joy-in-an-anxious-world?r=4o5o&amp;utm_campaign=post-expanded-share&amp;utm_medium=web"><span>How To Find Joy In an Anxious World</span></a><span> (Sara Bareilles and Dacher Keltner, 2025)</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[How To Handle AI Anxiety: A Computer Scientist and a Buddhist Teacher On Managing Uncertainty | Cal Newport & Matthew Brensilver]]></title><description><![CDATA[Will AI take our jobs? Kill us? This episode provides both fact-checking and a psychological survival guide.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-handle-ai-anxiety-a-computer</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-handle-ai-anxiety-a-computer</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Wed, 26 Aug 2026 07:00:37 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/212739023/91bc12253f1a123b5cfe4fa0f6570980.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Cal Newport is a Professor of Computer Science at Georgetown University, where he is also a founding faculty member of the Center for Digital Ethics and the inaugural Director of the Computer Science, Ethics and Society academic program. He is the New York Times bestselling author of eight books, including, most recently, Slow Productivity, A World Without Email, Digital Minimalism, and Deep Work. Newport is also a long-time contributing writer for the New Yorker and the host of the Deep Questions podcast.</p><p>Matthew Brensilver, MSW, PhD teaches retreats at the Insight Retreat Center, Spirit Rock Meditation Center and Insight Meditation Society. Before committing to teach meditation full-time, he spent years doing research on addiction pharmacotherapy at the UCLA Center for Behavioral and Addiction Medicine. Each winter and summer, he offers a four-month online Buddhist Psychology Training through Spirit Rock integrating Buddhist wisdom with modern psychotherapy. Matthew is the co-author of two books about meditation during adolescence and continues to be interested in the unfolding dialogue between Buddhism and science.</p><p>In this episode we talk about:</p><ul><li><p>What really happened when an AI agent hacked a company while running a test</p></li><li><p>Why one Silicon Valley belief system may be fueling AI panic more than the tech itself</p></li><li><p>Why senior programmers are quietly going back to writing code by hand</p></li><li><p>Where Cal draws the line on using AI to help you write versus write for you</p></li><li><p>Why Matthew worries AI could quietly replace the ordinary, unfinished parts of daily life</p></li><li><p>Buddhist advice on being with this unprecedented moment</p></li><li><p>How stabilizing your mind makes acceptance possible, and how to do it</p></li><li><p>Why calming the sense of emergency doesn&amp;#39;t erase uncertainty, but makes it easier to face</p></li></ul><p></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[How to say no without being an asshole]]></title><description><![CDATA[The middle path between being a doormat and a dick]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-say-no-without-being-an-asshole</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-say-no-without-being-an-asshole</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 24 Aug 2026 11:03:48 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Much of the language around meditation and Buddhism signals passivity. </span><em><span>Letting go, surrendering, loving-kindness. </span></em><span>On the surface, it sounds like a recipe for becoming a pushover.</span></p><p><span>But that is manifestly not the point. You can be kind and also stick up for yourself. What Buddhism helps you do is respond wisely to situations instead of reacting blindly.</span></p><p><span>There&#8217;s a classic story of a young meditation student asking an Indian master about how to practice compassion when somebody&#8217;s trying to mug you. The teacher said something to the effect of, &#8220;Take your umbrella and smack them as compassionately as possible.&#8221;</span></p><p><span>I had a conversation recently with the Buddhist teacher Susan Piver about how to find the middle path between being a doormat and being a dick. She had four suggestions for saying no without creating unnecessary conflict.</span></p><ol><li><p><strong><span>Know when you&#8217;re running on empty.</span></strong><span> Most of us don&#8217;t realize we need a boundary until we&#8217;re already resentful. Before you can hold a line with anyone, you need to know your own rhythms and internal state. Take a few days and try to simply notice what leaves you feeling emptied versus what doesn&#8217;t. You should get that data before making any big decisions or embarking on any tough conversations.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>Reframe what a limit is for.</span></strong><span> A boundary isn&#8217;t just about self-protection, it&#8217;s about protecting your relationships. Or, as Susan says, it is about not showing up depleted for the people who need you. A limit is how you make sure you have something left when it actually matters.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>Repair, don&#8217;t ruminate.</span></strong><span> When you get a boundary wrong&#8212;too loose or too rigid&#8212; you don&#8217;t need to belabor the apology. A short acknowledgement will do. E.g. &#8220;I&#8217;m sorry, I got grumpy with you.&#8221; Susan calls this cleaning up after yourself. Do it, then move on.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>Notice where your attention is going without your permission.</span></strong><span> We usually think of boundaries as something we set with people. But Susan argues we also need boundaries with technology. Every notification, every outrage cycle, every infinite feed is asking for your attention. You don&#8217;t have to say yes. </span></p></li></ol><p><span>For the full conversation, check out my </span><strong><a href="https://youtu.be/_-b2_XQoQqg?si=ra_cpwpCWU-8gQls"><span>recent podcast conversation with Susan</span></a></strong><span>. Aside from Buddhist boundary setting, we also talk about the difference between healing and fixing; how to use meditation to boost your creativity; and while you should never leave dishes in the sink overnight.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://youtu.be/_-b2_XQoQqg?si=ra_cpwpCWU-8gQls" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, 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sizes="100vw"><img src="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png" width="600" height="300" 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/__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png 848w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1272, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png 1272w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!tjL0!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1bd7ad61-dcaf-462f-b6af-270ccbef90e5_600x300.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p><span>To practice with great teachers, check out </span><strong><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app">my app</a></strong><span> &#8212; guided meditations, live teacher-led sessions, and real people doing it with you. Life is better in the carpool lane. (Introverts, no trust falls required &#8212; camera off is fine.)</span></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships"><span>Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><br>Enjoying this newsletter? Send it to a friend.</em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/hacks-for-overthinkers?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozNDYxNjczMjYsInBvc3RfaWQiOjIwNzQyMzgyMSwiaWF0IjoxNzg0ODk5NzYzLCJleHAiOjE3ODc0OTE3NjMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yNzIzNTM0Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.vaOCvd4DJXrVereMKlbrJ8QKk7BjNIlAwastSskeuGg&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/hacks-for-overthinkers?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozNDYxNjczMjYsInBvc3RfaWQiOjIwNzQyMzgyMSwiaWF0IjoxNzg0ODk5NzYzLCJleHAiOjE3ODc0OTE3NjMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yNzIzNTM0Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.vaOCvd4DJXrVereMKlbrJ8QKk7BjNIlAwastSskeuGg"><span>Share</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><span>And please check out our new </span><a href="http://danharris.com/">website</a><span> and consider following us on </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TenPercentHappier">YouTube</a><span>.</span></em></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Longevity Secrets (And Controversies) From The Blue Zones | Dan Buettner]]></title><description><![CDATA[Insights from the places on the planet where people apparently live the longest and healthiest lives.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/longevity-secrets-and-controversies</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/longevity-secrets-and-controversies</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 24 Aug 2026 07:02:40 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/212157114/65957e940fccf9faa03ac0575787fe29.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://www.bluezones.com/dan-buettner/"><span>Dan Buettner</span></a><span> is an explorer, National Geographic Fellow, and journalist. He has written a series of bestselling books, including </span><em><a href="https://bookshop.org/p/books/the-blue-zones-of-happiness-lessons-from-the-world-s-happiest-people-dan-buettner/15714041?ean=9781426219634"><span>The Blue Zones of Happiness</span></a></em><span> and </span><em><a href="https://bookshop.org/book/9781426220135"><span>The Blue Zones Kitchen: 100 Recipes for Living to 100</span></a></em><span>. He is also the host of the Netflix show, </span><em><a href="https://www.netflix.com/title/81214929"><span>Live to 100: Secrets of the Blue Zones</span></a></em><span>.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>The origin story of the Blue Zones</span></p></li><li><p><span>The nine common denominators, or Power Nine, to longevity.</span></p></li><li><p><span>The surprising information about much maligned foods such as pasta and bread</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why </span><em><span>trying </span></em><span>to pursue good health can actually work against you</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why the single most important factor in longevity isn&#8217;t advertised on instagram</span></p></li><li><p><span>Tips for integrating Blue Zones wisdom into your daily life, including designing a life where you move more naturally</span></p></li><li><p><span>And some of the critiques and controversies surrounding his work</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Two years ago I did something terrifying]]></title><description><![CDATA[An anniversary, a thank you, and a preview of upcoming stuff]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/two-years-ago-i-did-something-terrifying</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/two-years-ago-i-did-something-terrifying</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sun, 23 Aug 2026 12:02:01 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!fOwL!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F4a074de9-396e-4620-a55a-526f853a6d55_1280x720.heic" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Two years ago, I hit publish on </span><a href="https://youtu.be/Sm4yRUKlkxY"><span>a podcast episode</span></a><span> announcing that I was leaving the meditation company I co-founded and starting my own thing. I was excited. But also terrified.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://youtu.be/Sm4yRUKlkxY" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!fOwL!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F4a074de9-396e-4620-a55a-526f853a6d55_1280x720.heic 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!fOwL!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, 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/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!fOwL!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F4a074de9-396e-4620-a55a-526f853a6d55_1280x720.heic 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p></p><p><span>My team and I started with the germ of an idea: Could we create a next-generation meditation company that built not only an audience but also a community?</span></p><p><span>We launched with a modest offering, mostly via Substack. But, as a result of the extraordinary support we received from all of you, check out what we&#8217;ve been able to do:</span></p><ul><li><p><span>Launch a </span><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app"><span>meditation app </span></a><span>to provide a clean, simple way to access everything we&#8217;re doing</span></p></li><li><p><span>Provide ad-free access to the 10% Happier podcast for all subscribers</span></p></li></ul><ul><li><p><span>Add well over 100 guided meditations to our growing library</span></p></li><li><p><span>Establish weekly live meditation and Q&amp;A sessions, featuring me and a rotating cast of teachers who are (and I say this without exaggeration) among the best on the planet</span></p></li><li><p><span>Run three meditation challenges with teachers such as Joseph Goldstein and Sebene Selassie</span></p></li><li><p><span>Pull off an eight-week live video series with Sharon Salzberg on the Eightfold Path, our first attempt at a structured program to make Buddhism more accessible</span></p></li><li><p><span>And (this might be the part I am most proud of) provide more than 5,000 free subscriptions to people who can&#8217;t afford one</span></p></li></ul><p><span>I&#8217;m especially heartened because none of it has been funded by a venture capitalist or other investor. It has been funded by you. (Okay, also initially by me and by podcast advertising revenue, but largely by you.) Your contributions go directly to paying teachers and improving our product as fast as we&#8217;re able.</span></p><p><span>Which brings me to this fall, because we&#8217;ve got a ton of cool stuff coming up. Here&#8217;s a preview:</span></p><p><strong><span>September:</span></strong><span> A &#8220;Reset&#8221; challenge led by Diana Winston, the director of mindfulness at UCLA. As the summer ends and we resume our normal routines, Diana will drop a series of meditations designed to help you reset in key moments&#8212;like when you get hijacked by anger or wake up in the middle of the night and can&#8217;t fall back asleep. (Also in September,  we will be dropping some longer meditations for those of you who have been asking.)</span></p><p><strong><span>October:</span></strong><span> A new course from legendary Buddhist teacher Sharon Salzberg. With the US elections almost upon us, this course is designed to help you stay sane amidst a guaranteed-to-be-bonkers news cycle. Sharon&#8216;s essential thesis is: you need to take care of your own mind first. It&#8217;s not self-indulgent. It&#8217;s a community service. (Also in October, another batch of longer meditations, this time designed for sleep.)</span></p><p><strong><span>November:</span></strong><span> Fan favorite Vinny Ferraro returns as teacher of the month. (Speaking of Vinny, he&#8217;s also working on a new course for us on the Brahma Viharas. That will come out whenever my next book does. Which, I know, never seems to happen!)</span></p><p><strong><span>January:</span></strong><span> We are in progress on an exciting New Years Challenge that is a bit different than what we have done in the past. There will be special guests. More soon.</span></p><p><strong><span>February:</span></strong><span> By popular demand, Oren Jay Sofer will be your teacher of the month, and he&#8217;s working on some sleep gems.</span></p><p><span>We&#8217;re in conversations right now with some extraordinary teachers about courses and live series. We&#8217;re also talking to developers who think they can help us improve the app and add many of the features you have been requesting.</span></p><p><span>So: thank you. Sincerely. I am extraordinarily grateful that your support allows me to keep working with my team, meeting all of you, interviewing experts, and pestering dharma teachers. Thank you for showing up. For listening, for reading, for practicing even when you really don&#8217;t want to.</span></p><p><span>To those of you with a paid app subscription: an extra thank you. You didn&#8217;t just buy a product, you funded an experiment. One that I think can improve our lives and, by extension, the world.</span></p><p><span>xx<br>Dan</span></p><p><em><span>As always, if you have any questions about the app, please reach out to Roy at </span></em><a href="mailto:support@danharris.com">support@danharris.com</a><em><span>. He&#8217;s a real person and he&#8217;s really awesome.</span></em></p><p><span>If you&#8217;re not in the app yet, the door&#8217;s always open. Live sits, courses, challenges, guided practices, the ad-free podcast, and a supportive community.  Sign up for a free 14-day trial </span><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships"><span>here</span></a><span>.</span></p><p><span>If you&#8217;re a paid Substack subscriber that hasn&#8217;t moved over to the app yet, you already have access at your current subscription rate! Hit up Roy at </span><a href="mailto:support@danharris.com"><span>support@danharris.com</span></a><span> and he&#8217;ll get you going!</span></p><p></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><span>Want to support what we're doing? Spread the word by sending to a friend.</span></em></p><div class="captioned-button-wrap" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/two-years-ago-i-did-something-terrifying?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;}" data-component-name="CaptionedButtonToDOM"><div class="preamble"><p class="cta-caption"></p></div><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/two-years-ago-i-did-something-terrifying?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/two-years-ago-i-did-something-terrifying?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share"><span>Share</span></a></p></div>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Evidence for Aliens, the Afterlife, Bigfoot, Sea Monsters, and More | Miguel Sancho]]></title><description><![CDATA[An investigative journalist on why reincarnation, ghosts, and unexplained phenomena deserve more scrutiny; plus, why our need to believe in something bigger isn't something to be embarrassed about.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-evidence-for-aliens-the-afterlife</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-evidence-for-aliens-the-afterlife</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 21 Aug 2026 07:02:04 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/211744439/ca3f4165dc297cec2b706227d1c8b701.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Miguel Sancho is an Emmy Award&#8211;winning television producer and author. He is a veteran of ABC News, where he helped run </span><em><span>20/20</span></em><span>, and he is now the executive producer of </span><em><span>The Proof Is Out There</span></em><span> on the History Channel. His latest book is </span><em><a href="https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Evidence-of-the-Extraordinary/Miguel-Sancho/9781668085455"><span>Evidence of the Extraordinary: Discoveries from the Series The Proof is Out There</span></a><span>.</span></em></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>How to walk the line between skepticism and credulity</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why most UFO footage falls apart under scrutiny</span></p></li><li><p><span>The scientific case for Bigfoot</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why kids who remember past lives are hard to dismiss</span></p></li><li><p><span>How to spot a fraudulent psychic</span></p></li><li><p><span>Pascal&#8217;s &#8220;God-shaped hole&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>What unexplained ancient rock structures reveal about our history</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[You Can Stop Fixing Yourself: Buddhist Advice on Boundaries, Rituals, and Dropping Your Self-Aggression | Susan Piver]]></title><description><![CDATA[Plus: Why you're a "mystic" even though you don't know it, how to find the "magic" in meditation, and the power of simple apologies (and cleaning the dishes).]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/you-can-stop-fixing-yourself-buddhist</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/you-can-stop-fixing-yourself-buddhist</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Wed, 19 Aug 2026 07:02:45 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/211584679/3afefdebb515ff029a8c62d765824cfb.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://openheartproject.com/about/"><span>Susan Piver</span></a><span> is a 30 year student of Tibetan Buddhism, New York Times bestselling author, and founder of </span><a href="https://openheartproject.com/"><span>The Open Heart Project</span></a><span>, an online meditation community with close to 20,000 members. Her latest book is </span><em><a href="https://openheartproject.com/inexplicable-magic-meditation-for-mystics/"><span>Inexplicable Magic: Meditation for Mystics</span></a></em><span>.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>Why meditation&#8217;s real payoff can&#8217;t be explained</span></p></li><li><p><span>The crucial difference between mindfulness and awareness</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why you can&#8217;t think your way into oneness</span></p></li><li><p><span>The seven daily habits of a modern &#8220;mystic&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why boundaries are essential to a spiritual life</span></p></li><li><p><span>Susan&#8217;s unglamorous trick for building real confidence</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why trying to fix yourself backfires</span></p></li><li><p><span>The secret to attracting inspiration</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The surprisingly compelling science behind “going to your happy place”]]></title><description><![CDATA[Harnessing your imagination to deal with anxiety, anger, and even injuries]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-surprisingly-compelling-science</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-surprisingly-compelling-science</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 17 Aug 2026 11:03:24 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!IY7z!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa36b8203-e28e-4ab0-87dd-d1c8957cd34c_600x300.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Ever had the experience of realizing that an idea you&#8217;d long considered to be bullshit is actually genuinely helpful? (I have this experience all the time. But maybe that&#8217;s because I am too skeptical and dismissive?)</span></p><p><span>Anyway, here&#8217;s a case in point: A few years ago, when I was at the height of a claustrophobia crisis which was making airplane rides miserable, my therapist recommended that when experiencing panic, I should try &#8220;going to my happy place.&#8221; This struck me as the apex therapeutic cliche. Right up there with &#8220;living your best life&#8221; and &#8220;good vibes only.&#8221; Put that shit on a scented candle, but don&#8217;t recommend it to me when I&#8217;m in crisis.</span></p><p><span>To be fair, my therapist recommended a specific &#8220;happy place&#8221; protocol. When I felt my anxiety mounting, he wanted me to conjure a vivid mental image of sitting on the beach with all of my friends and family. In a warm, wide-open space, surrounded by everybody who makes me feel safe.</span></p><p><span>And you know what? It actually kind of worked. It was not a silver bullet (I don&#8217;t believe in silver bullets). But consciously using the more rational and imaginative parts of my brain took the fear center off-line.</span></p><p><span>Turns out the happy place exercise is just one of many ways to harness imagination to deal with life&#8217;s various vexations. I recently interviewed </span><a href="https://cassandravieten.com"><span>Dr. Cassi Vieten</span></a><span>, a clinical psychologist and director of research at UC San Diego&#8217;s Arthur C. Clarke Center for Human Imagination. She argues that imagination is a neurological tool and that most of us are pointing it in the wrong direction. Usually, we spend the day running worst-case scenarios, imagining disaster, and rehearsing conflict. </span></p><p><span>But we can reroute all that powerful energy; here are three other ways Dr. Vieten recommends putting your imagination to work (rather than letting it work against you):</span></p><p><strong><span>1.</span></strong><span> </span><strong><span>Visualization</span></strong><span>: </span>Dr. Vieten<span> told me about a truly mind-blowing study showing that people doing physical therapy who visualized their muscles getting stronger gained 30% more strength than those who didn&#8217;t. Your brain responds to imagined experience almost the same as real experience. </span></p><p><strong><span>2.</span></strong><span> </span><strong><span>Craft a Counter-Story</span></strong><span>: When a doom loop kicks in, trying to stop the thought usually doesn&#8217;t work. What </span>Dr. Vieten<span> suggests instead is to construct a specific, sensory alternative: walk through what &#8220;fine&#8221; actually looks, sounds, and feels like. When your brain catastrophizes, you can train it to do the opposite.</span></p><p><strong><span>3.</span></strong><span> </span><strong><span>Question Yourself:</span></strong><span> Most conflict, </span>Dr. Vieten<span> argues, is an imagination gap: two people having the same experience but creating two different stories about what it means. Ask yourself: &#8220;What am I imagining about this person right now?&#8221; This can short-circuit a conflict much faster than arguing your position. </span></p><p><span>None of this is magic. As Dr. Vieten says, imagination is influential, not deterministic. You can&#8217;t visualize your way out of needing an oncologist. But pointing your mind somewhere on purpose is a hugely helpful skill. </span></p><p><span>If you want to get all the details, check out </span><a href="https://youtu.be/tBFOwdPvx6k"><span>my full conversation with Dr. Cassi Vieten</span></a><span>. We also cover how to use imagination to reduce physical pain, defuse the &#8220;inevitability loop,&#8221; and produce what she calls &#8220;glimmers,&#8221; the neurological opposite of a trigger.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://youtu.be/tBFOwdPvx6k" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!IY7z!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa36b8203-e28e-4ab0-87dd-d1c8957cd34c_600x300.png 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!IY7z!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, 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/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!IY7z!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa36b8203-e28e-4ab0-87dd-d1c8957cd34c_600x300.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p><span><br><br>And if you want a place to practice noticing what&#8217;s going on in your own mind, check out </span><strong><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app">my app</a></strong><span>: guided meditations, live teacher-led sessions, and real people learning the practice with you.</span></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships"><span>Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em>Enjoying this newsletter? Send it to a friend.</em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-surprisingly-compelling-science?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/the-surprisingly-compelling-science?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share"><span>Share</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><span>And please check out our new </span><a href="http://danharris.com/">website</a><span> and consider following us on </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TenPercentHappier">YouTube</a><span>.</span></em></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[You Can Get Through It: How to Handle the Hardest Things That Will Ever Happen to You | Dr. Lucy Hone]]></title><description><![CDATA[Why the five stages of grief are a myth, a go-to phrase for when everything's falling apart, and three steps for getting through loss.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-handle-the-hardest-things</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/how-to-handle-the-hardest-things</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 17 Aug 2026 07:02:01 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/211184190/54b01d4b2cc13d98bb5f38e8c647ce7c.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong><span>Dr. Lucy Hone </span></strong><span>is an adjunct fellow at the University of Canterbury and a sought-after professional speaker, a bestselling author, and an award-winning internationally published science educator. She is regularly featured in international media, including in </span><em><span>The Guardian</span></em><span>, </span><em><span>Hidden Brain</span></em><span>, and </span><em><span>The</span></em><span> </span><em><span>Washington Post</span></em><span>. Dr. Hone is a columnist for </span><em><span>Psychology Today</span></em><span>.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>A three-step recipe for getting through any major loss</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why the five stages of grief are a myth</span></p></li><li><p><span>The surprising research on who supports grievers best (hint: pets)</span></p></li><li><p><span>Living losses vs. death losses &#8212; and why ranking grief doesn&#8217;t help</span></p></li><li><p><span>What it means to have your &#8220;assumptive world&#8221; shattered</span></p></li><li><p><span>Rebuilding identity after loss: answering &#8220;who am I now?&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>Finding self-compassion through &#8220;real, not perfect,&#8221; not perfectionism</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Science of Journaling: How 15 Minutes of Writing Can Free Up Your Brain, Improve Your Health, and Make You a Better Friend | Dr. James Pennebaker]]></title><description><![CDATA[Writing can reduce overthinking, rumination, and anxiety. Here&#39;s what the researcher who pioneered the science suggests.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-journaling-how-15</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-journaling-how-15</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 14 Aug 2026 07:02:34 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/211091900/b63b1a662683f66f04509949a604f0f8.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>James Pennebaker is Professor Emeritus of Psychology at the University of Texas at Austin. He is known for his early research on expressive writing and health. More recently, he has pioneered ways to study people&#8217;s personalities and behaviors through the analysis of their language use. His text analysis program LIWC is used across disciplines. Author of over 300 scientific articles and 8 books, his research has affected our understanding and treatment of mental and physical health of people dealing with upheavals in their lives.</p><p>This episode first aired in November 2024, and is co-hosted by Dr. Bianca Harris.</p><p>In this episode we talk about:</p><ul><li><p>The specific form of journaling, called expressive writing or therapeutic journaling, that<br>he invented and studied.</p></li><li><p>Other kinds of journaling such as to-do lists and gratitude lists.</p></li><li><p>Why writing things down helps shift our perspective on our stress or trauma.</p></li><li><p>How that can lead to a cascade of benefits, from improved sleep to improved working memory</p></li><li><p>And why Pennebaker, who&#8217;s a very laid-back dude, is so laid-back about how often we need to journal in order to derive its benefits</p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Non-BS Science of Manifestation: How Your Imagination Can Help With Pain, Anxiety, Conflict, and Recovery | Cassi Vieten]]></title><description><![CDATA[How elite athletes use visualization to improve performance, why visualization can turbo-charge physical recovery, and the mental trick that can make your nervous system feel safe.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-non-bs-science-of-manifestation</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-non-bs-science-of-manifestation</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Wed, 12 Aug 2026 07:00:34 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/210650005/253283ce3f259917ba5d62e08ec76990.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://cassandravieten.com/"><span>Cassi Vieten, PhD</span></a><span>, is a licensed clinical psychologist and director of research at the Arthur C. Clarke Center for Human Imagination at the University of California, San Diego, where she also directs the Center for Mindfulness. She is the author </span><em><a href="https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Imagine-That/Cassandra-Vieten/9781668067390"><span>Imagine That: Transform How You Think, Feel, and Live with the Science of Imagination</span></a></em><span>.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>Why imagination is the oldest human technology</span></p></li><li><p><span>The VISTA method for training your imagination</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why manifestation isn&#8217;t as crazy as it sounds</span></p></li><li><p><span>How to talk yourself out of catastrophizing</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why conflict is really a clash of two imaginations</span></p></li><li><p><span>What glimmers are</span></p></li><li><p><span>How to use imagination to dial down physical pain</span></p></li><li><p><span>What years of hidden alcoholism taught Cassi about a narrowed imagination</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The science of being more likable]]></title><description><![CDATA[An evidence-based guide to winning friends and influencing people]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-being-more-likable</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-being-more-likable</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 10 Aug 2026 11:04:28 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Pretty much everyone wants to be liked. That doesn&#8217;t mean you&#8217;re needy; it means you&#8217;re a member of </span><em><span>Homo sapiens</span></em><span>. We evolved in small tribes where banishment could equal death. We (again, </span><em><span>most of us&#8212;</span></em><span>some people truly don&#8217;t give a shit) are deeply wired to want social acceptance.</span></p><p><span>What&#8217;s cool is that new science is now showing that there are evidence-based ways to boost your likability. I learned about these hacks from the Stanford neuroscientist </span><a href="https://www.benrein.com"><span>Ben Rein</span></a><span>, author of </span><em><span>Why Brains Need Friends</span></em><span>.</span></p><p><strong><span>Talk more than you think you should. </span></strong><span>Most of us assume the key to being likable is letting the other person do most of the talking. Surprisingly, the research suggests otherwise. Speaking more tends to signal warmth and confidence. In one study, college students assigned to speak about 70% of the time were rated as more likable than those assigned to speak only 30%. This doesn&#8217;t mean monopolize the conversation. It means don&#8217;t stay quiet because you&#8217;re afraid of saying the wrong thing.</span></p><p><strong><span>Be strategically vulnerable.</span></strong><span> Sharing something real about yourself consistently increases how much people like you. You need to pick your spot, though. You don&#8217;t want to bleed all over the place in random, inappropriate moments. But if you can use your Spidey sense to figure out when to open up, it&#8217;s often a winning strategy.</span></p><p><strong><span>Let mimicry happen.</span></strong><span> In good interactions, people naturally start to mirror each other: body position, facial expressions, vocal cadence. This isn&#8217;t just a byproduct of connection, it&#8217;s a driver of it. When it happens, the other person&#8217;s brain registers it as affiliation. You don&#8217;t need to manufacture it. Just don&#8217;t suppress it.</span></p><p><strong><span>Make eye contact.</span></strong><span> Eye contact is a strong builder of affiliation. Studies show that appropriate, sustained eye contact increases perceived warmth and trustworthiness. It also triggers what Rein calls &#8220;interbrain synchrony,&#8221; your brain beginning to sync up with the person you&#8217;re talking to. If sustained eye contact makes you anxious, here&#8217;s his practical fix: when you&#8217;re three feet from someone, looking at the other person&#8217;s mouth reads as eye contact.</span></p><p><span>Check out </span><a href="https://youtu.be/8oejGAlZZP0"><span>my full conversation with Dr. Rein</span></a><span>. We talk about why the most powerful thing you can do for your brain health costs nothing. Social connection improves your biology, mood, and longevity. It affects everything from your immune system to your bone density to your risk for dementia, stroke, and heart disease. It also makes you happy (even introverts, who simply need less of it). As Rein puts it, social connection changes your brain in ways that resemble some of the mechanisms engaged by MDMA, but without the hangover.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://youtu.be/8oejGAlZZP0" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, 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src="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg" width="600" height="300" 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/__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg 848w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1272, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg 1272w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!pqHW!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1c3342ff-0e58-48c0-af4e-e1fe77e78be9_600x300.jpeg 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><div><hr></div><p><span>This need for connection applies to meditation too. It used to be communal, before our culture made it a solo app habit (which is probably why it&#8217;s so hard for so many to boot up a practice or stick with it). One way to build community back in: </span><strong><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app">my app</a></strong><span> &#8212; guided meditations, live teacher-led sessions, and real people doing it with you. Life is better in the carpool lane. (Introverts, no trust falls required &#8212; camera off is fine.)</span></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships"><span>Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app</span></a></p><div><hr></div><p style="text-align: center;"></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em>Enjoying this newsletter? Send it to a friend.</em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-being-more-likable?utm_source=substack&utm_medium=email&utm_content=share&action=share&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/the-science-of-being-more-likable?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share"><span>Share</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><span>And please check out our new </span><a href="http://danharris.com/">website</a><span> and consider following us on </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TenPercentHappier">YouTube</a><span>.</span></em></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[The Neuroscience of Likability, Social Connection, and Brain Health | Ben Rein]]></title><description><![CDATA[Plus: Mythbusting sugar, supplements, loneliness, and more.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-neuroscience-of-likability-social</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/the-neuroscience-of-likability-social</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 10 Aug 2026 07:02:17 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/210241785/b84ab85f9a54816d7f027bad39d84659.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://www.benrein.com/"><span>Ben Rein</span></a><span>, PhD is a neuroscientist who studies the biology of social behavior and explains the brain to an audience of over 1.2 million people online. He serves as Chief Science Officer of the Mind Science Foundation, Head of Science Communication at ResearchHub Foundation, and teaches at Stanford University.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>Distinguishing between science and online &#8220;neurobullshit&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>Three research-backed ways to protect your brain health and boost social connection, even for introverts</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why isolation shows up in the body like a low-grade injury</span></p></li><li><p><span>The real difference between loneliness and isolation, and why we rarely recognize either in ourselves</span></p></li><li><p><span>The power of pets in reducing stress and inflammation</span></p></li><li><p><span>Whether sugar is really more addictive than cocaine (short answer: no, and here&#8217;s why)</span></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Self-Help Without Other People Is Just Selfish — and Here’s the Science to Prove It | Dan Harris]]></title><description><![CDATA[Allison Gilbert interviewed Dan Harris live at the 92nd Street Y &#8212; and it turned into one of the most practical conversations he&#8217;s ever had about anxiety, self-compassion, and why inner work is...]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/self-help-without-other-people-is</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/self-help-without-other-people-is</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Fri, 07 Aug 2026 07:01:14 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/209985111/980900f58e94b5c20f90d11b4d63eec6.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Dan doesn&#8217;t usually sit in the interviewee&#8217;s chair &#8212; but when journalist and author Allison Gilbert invited him to speak at the 92nd Street Y as part of their Connected Lives series, he said yes. What followed was one of the more wide-ranging conversations Dan has had about his own practice, his own anxieties, and why he&#8217;s become convinced that inner work divorced from relationships is just selfishness dressed up as self-care. The evening also included a guided loving-kindness meditation &#8212; metta practice &#8212; that Dan led live with the audience.</span></p><p><strong><span>They talked about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>Why Dan thinks the meditation world&#8217;s PR problem has shifted &#8212; it&#8217;s no longer &#8220;this is weird hippie stuff,&#8221; it&#8217;s &#8220;I get it, but I personally can&#8217;t do it&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>The upward spiral: how taking care of your mind improves your relationships, which improves your inner weather, which improves your relationships further &#8212; and the &#8220;toilet vortex&#8221; that runs in the opposite direction</span></p></li><li><p><span>Free-range mindfulness: why brushing your teeth or standing in a grocery line can rewire your brain just like formal seated practice</span></p></li><li><p><span>The self-compassion toolkit &#8212; Kristin Neff&#8217;s three-step practice, distanced self-talk, and why putting your hand on your heart is &#8220;cheesy as f*ck&#8221; but actually works</span></p></li><li><p><span>Joseph Goldstein&#8217;s single best question for breaking an anxiety loop: &#8220;Is this useful?&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why micro-interactions &#8212; with your doorman, your barista, a stranger on the elevator &#8212; are one of the most underrated sources of happiness</span></p></li></ul><p><span>Allison Gilbert is a journalist, author, and co-author of </span><em>The Joy of Connections. </em><span>She&#8217;s also designed an app to help people deepen the relationships they already have. She writes and speaks about human connection, grief, and resilience. Learn more at </span><a href="http://beingmoreconnected.com/">BeingMoreConnected.com</a><span>.</span></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[Resetting Your Nervous System When You're Anxious, Hurting, or Just Powering Through | Johanna Franzel]]></title><description><![CDATA[How to calm down fast with an 'inventory' practice, how to build 'resources' you can call on anytime, and why 'healing' might be the wrong goal to chase. Plus, living with autoimmune disorder...]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/resetting-your-nervous-system-when</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/resetting-your-nervous-system-when</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Wed, 05 Aug 2026 07:02:00 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/209784210/1166100afc40efbe7ae902d5ad4cb06f.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://www.johannafranzel.com/"><span>Johanna Franzel</span></a><span> is a teacher, somatic practitioner, educator, and author of the new book </span><em><a href="https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/817300/write-yourself-home-by-johanna-franzel/"><span>Write Yourself Home: A Creative Guide for Living Well in the Body You Have Through Embodied Writing and Movement Practice</span></a></em><span>. She brings both professional expertise and the lived experience of navigating chronic illness for more than two decades. She also writes a Substack called </span><em><a href="/__u/johannafranzel.substack.com/"><span>Permission Slips</span></a></em><span>.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>Why your nervous system stays on high alert for threats that aren&#8217;t actually there</span></p></li><li><p><span>The three-step &#8220;inventory&#8221; practice for finding calm in your body, right now</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why calling to mind a &#8220;resource&#8221; can genuinely shift your physiology</span></p></li><li><p><span>&#8220;Presence without scrutiny&#8221;: the difference between being with someone (or yourself) and staring them down</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why Johanna doesn&#8217;t love the word &#8220;healing&#8221; and the word she prefers instead</span></p></li><li><p><span>How to turn your most embarrassing memories into material, not shame</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why the way you talk to yourself matters more than you think</span></p></li><li><p><span>What over two decades with Crohn&#8217;s disease taught Johanna about self-advocacy and knowing your own margins</span></p></li></ul><p><strong><span>Get the 10% with Dan Harris app </span><a href="https://app.danharris.com/membership"><span>here</span></a></strong></p><p><strong><span>Sign up for Dan&#8217;s free newsletter </span><a href="http://www.danharris.com"><span>here</span></a></strong></p><p><strong><span>Follow Dan on social: </span><a href="https://bit.ly/3tGigG5"><span>Instagram</span></a><span>, </span><a href="https://bit.ly/3FOA84J"><span>TikTok</span></a></strong></p><p><strong><span>Subscribe to our </span><a href="https://bit.ly/3FybRzD"><span>YouTube Channel</span></a></strong></p><p><strong><span>To advertise on the show, contact sales@advertisecast.com or visit </span><a href="https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris"><span>https://advertising.libsyn.com/10HappierwithDanHarris</span></a></strong></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[For when other people are being a pain in the ass]]></title><description><![CDATA[6 simple hacks for navigating the messiness of human affairs]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/for-when-other-people-are-being-a</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/for-when-other-people-are-being-a</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 03 Aug 2026 11:03:42 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>I often call it the human curse: We need other people in order to be happy, and yet other people can be a titanic ass-ache. The temptation&#8212;and this is now easier than ever&#8212;is to simply retreat. Drown yourself in work. Get faded on gummies. Wait in endless lines for artisanal frozen yogurt. Scroll, binge, place obscure bets on prediction-market apps. Anything to insulate yourself from the messiness of interpersonal entanglements. This is a reliable shortcut to unhappiness.</span></p><p><span>The good news is there are lots of little strategies for staying engaged with other members of </span><em><span>homo sapiens</span></em><span> without losing your damn mind. Below are six that I gleaned from a true maestro: </span><strong><a href="https://www.nedratawwab.com/"><span>Nedra Glover Tawwab</span></a></strong><span>, a therapist and author of multiple bestselling books. As always, please view this as a menu, not a to-do list. Take what works, leave the rest.</span></p><ol><li><p><strong><span>Renegotiate your &#8220;silent agreements.&#8221;</span></strong><span> There&#8217;s no contract when you enter a relationship. This is true for friendships, romantic relationships, and often your coworkers, too. So you start planning the trips, managing the calendar, initiating the important conversation&#8212;and somewhere it becomes your job, even though you never signed up for it. You boil quietly. Then one day you explode and the other person stares back at you, blinking in confusion. Nedra&#8217;s point: have the conversation before that explosion. You can always renegotiate.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>Ditch the &#8220;idiot compassion.&#8221;</span></strong><span> Most of us want to be helpful. But we also don&#8217;t want to be a doormat. (Which is what the Tibetan Buddhists call &#8220;idiot compassion.&#8221;) Before you reflexively say yes to something, ask yourself two questions: is this need actually urgent, and do I have anything real to give right now? If the answer to either is no, pause and consider how best to proceed. Nedra&#8217;s example: someone asks if you&#8217;re free to talk right now. You&#8217;re not. But could you do it in 20 minutes? Or tomorrow? Maybe.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>&#8220;Local distancing.&#8221;</span></strong><span> When someone in your life is consistently unkind or annoying, the temptation is to cut them off. Block them on your phone. Refuse to speak to them ever again. But often this just gives them a larger role in your mind than they had before. (I&#8217;ve seen this play out in my own life, quite painfully.) Nedra argues that a better move is to engage in what she calls &#8220;local distancing.&#8221; No major confrontation, no exit interview. You just talk a little less, see them a little less, give the relationship some air. If they let you have that space (and yes, I know, this is a huge variable), you might even be able to salvage the relationship. And meanwhile, they don&#8217;t get to live rent-free in your head.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>When someone offers help, say yes.</span></strong><span> One of the biggest barriers to healthy relationships is refusing to accept help. It&#8217;s a real struggle for many of us, including Nedra herself. Her practice now: if she&#8217;s having a party and someone asks &#8220;Can I bring anything?&#8221; she says yes&#8212;even to napkins. The point isn&#8217;t the napkins. It&#8217;s that you&#8217;re practicing being a person who receives. When you reflexively say no every time, people stop asking.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>Stop trying to make one person do everything.</span></strong><span> Your romantic partner does not have to be your best friend, your therapist, your workout buddy, and someone who loves live music. Think about what each person in your life is actually good at. The friend who drops everything when you&#8217;re sick may have no patience for your career spiral. Go to somebody else for that. The more people you have, the less any single one of them has to carry.</span></p></li><li><p><strong><span>Bro, put away the phone. </span></strong><span>When someone is in front of you, put the phone down. Not only because it&#8217;s polite, but also because it&#8217;s in your best interest. Neurologically, you actually can&#8217;t do two things at once. If you&#8217;re looking at your phone&#8212;and frankly, even if it&#8217;s just sitting on the table&#8212;something is always not being heard. (Obviously there are exceptions to this rule. E.g., if you&#8217;re managing a work emergency or if your kid needs to reach you.)</span></p></li></ol><p><span>One thing Nedra said near the end of our recent podcast interview: when you change your own behavior in a relationship, it sometimes changes how the other person acts. But even when it doesn&#8217;t, it can still make a difference. It can alter how you see them, which in itself may be enough. As an example, she pointed out how she&#8217;s been meditating in the mornings, and now people who used to get under her skin don&#8217;t bother her as much.</span></p><p><span>If you want more from Nedra&#8212;on finding your people, on asking for help, on whether we&#8217;ve weaponized the concept of boundaries&#8212;</span><strong><a href="https://youtu.be/DdqCGyEvCHM"><span>the full conversation is up now</span></a></strong><span>.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://youtu.be/DdqCGyEvCHM" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, 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/__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png 1456w" sizes="100vw"><img src="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png" width="600" height="300" data-attrs="{&quot;src&quot;:&quot;https://substack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com/public/images/b6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png&quot;,&quot;srcNoWatermark&quot;:null,&quot;fullscreen&quot;:null,&quot;imageSize&quot;:null,&quot;height&quot;:300,&quot;width&quot;:600,&quot;resizeWidth&quot;:null,&quot;bytes&quot;:252212,&quot;alt&quot;:null,&quot;title&quot;:null,&quot;type&quot;:&quot;image/png&quot;,&quot;href&quot;:&quot;https://youtu.be/DdqCGyEvCHM&quot;,&quot;belowTheFold&quot;:false,&quot;topImage&quot;:true,&quot;internalRedirect&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/i/209254259?img=https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png&quot;,&quot;isProcessing&quot;:false,&quot;align&quot;:null,&quot;offset&quot;:false}" class="sizing-normal" alt="" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png 424w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_848, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png 848w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1272, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png 1272w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!o7Nz!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fb6f78449-9a99-4718-92b9-3b49d618af16_600x300.png 1456w" sizes="100vw" fetchpriority="high"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a></figure></div><p>This need for connection applies to meditation too. It used to be communal, before our culture made it a solo app habit (which is probably why it&#8217;s so hard for so many to boot up a practice or stick with it). One way to build community back in: <strong><a href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app">my app</a></strong> &#8212; guided meditations, live teacher-led sessions, and real people doing it with you. Life is better in the carpool lane. (Introverts, no trust falls required &#8212; camera off is fine.)</p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="https://www.danharris.com/meditation-app#memberships"><span>Check out the 10% with Dan Harris app</span></a></p><div><hr></div><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!OYvH!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, 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/__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F755a5061-c700-4377-99ac-30622d61cbb7_2500x1327.webp 1272w, /__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!OYvH!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_1456, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_auto, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F755a5061-c700-4377-99ac-30622d61cbb7_2500x1327.webp 1456w" sizes="100vw" loading="lazy"></picture><div class="image-link-expand"><div class="pencraft pc-display-flex pc-gap-8 pc-reset"><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container restack-image"><svg aria-hidden="true" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 20 20" fill="none" stroke-width="1.5" stroke="var(--color-fg-primary)" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg"><g><path d="M2.53001 7.81595C3.49179 4.73911 6.43281 2.5 9.91173 2.5C13.1684 2.5 15.9537 4.46214 17.0852 7.23684L17.6179 8.67647M17.6179 8.67647L18.5002 4.26471M17.6179 8.67647L13.6473 6.91176M17.4995 12.1841C16.5378 15.2609 13.5967 17.5 10.1178 17.5C6.86118 17.5 4.07589 15.5379 2.94432 12.7632L2.41165 11.3235M2.41165 11.3235L1.5293 15.7353M2.41165 11.3235L6.38224 13.0882"></path></g></svg></button><button tabindex="0" type="button" class="pencraft pc-reset pencraft icon-container view-image"><svg xmlns="http://www.w3.org/2000/svg" width="20" height="20" viewBox="0 0 24 24" fill="none" stroke="currentColor" stroke-width="2" stroke-linecap="round" stroke-linejoin="round" class="lucide lucide-maximize2 lucide-maximize-2"><polyline points="15 3 21 3 21 9"></polyline><polyline points="9 21 3 21 3 15"></polyline><line x1="21" x2="14" y1="3" y2="10"></line><line x1="3" x2="10" y1="21" y2="14"></line></svg></button></div></div></div></a><figcaption class="image-caption">Meditation retreats can be fun.</figcaption></figure></div><p><span>Jeff Warren, Sebene Selassie, and I are doing another version of our annual </span><strong><a href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party"><span>Meditation Party</span></a></strong><span> retreat this October at the Omega Institute in upstate New York. It&#8217;s a weekend-long meditation retreat that&#8217;s actually enjoyable. </span> This is not a knock on the more hardcore retreats. Those are also great. But they&#8217;re definitely not the only way. Learn more or get your tickets <strong><a href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party">here</a></strong>! </p><div><hr></div><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/subscribe?&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe now&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/subscribe"><span>Subscribe now</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em>Enjoying this newsletter? Send it to a friend.</em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/hacks-for-overthinkers?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozNDYxNjczMjYsInBvc3RfaWQiOjIwNzQyMzgyMSwiaWF0IjoxNzg0ODk5NzYzLCJleHAiOjE3ODc0OTE3NjMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yNzIzNTM0Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.vaOCvd4DJXrVereMKlbrJ8QKk7BjNIlAwastSskeuGg&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/hacks-for-overthinkers?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozNDYxNjczMjYsInBvc3RfaWQiOjIwNzQyMzgyMSwiaWF0IjoxNzg0ODk5NzYzLCJleHAiOjE3ODc0OTE3NjMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yNzIzNTM0Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.vaOCvd4DJXrVereMKlbrJ8QKk7BjNIlAwastSskeuGg"><span>Share</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><span>And please check out our new </span><a href="http://danharris.com/">website</a><span> and consider following us on </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TenPercentHappier">YouTube</a><span>.</span></em></p>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[For The Lonely, Suffocated, or Overextended: How To Balance Your Relationships When Others Won't Change | Nedra Glover Tawwab]]></title><description><![CDATA[Plus: how to build a village, why your attachment style isn't your destiny, and a two-step method for asking for help that actually works.]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/for-the-lonely-suffocated-or-overextended</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/for-the-lonely-suffocated-or-overextended</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Mon, 03 Aug 2026 07:01:35 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://api.substack.com/feed/podcast/209140316/405e1721f087644ac55c68ade9172fe3.mp3" length="0" type="audio/mpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="https://www.nedratawwab.com/"><span>Nedra Glover Tawwab</span></a><span> is a licensed therapist and the author of </span><em><a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/0593192095?lv=shuf&amp;channelId=500&amp;plpRedirect=mhFallback"><span>Set Boundaries, Find Peace</span></a></em><span>, an instant New York Times best-seller translated into over 35 languages worldwide. In addition, she has authored seven other books, including </span><em><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Drama-Free-Managing-Unhealthy-Relationships-ebook/dp/B0B4ZQ6XHJ/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=Xw0TE&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.3a079c4e-f938-40c9-a0ed-01ef0e9528e9&amp;pf_rd_p=3a079c4e-f938-40c9-a0ed-01ef0e9528e9&amp;pf_rd_r=141-9976842-2413604&amp;pd_rd_wg=aOTWq&amp;pd_rd_r=5ec740f8-08a3-458b-9a0a-dd340f4f0238"><span>Drama Free</span></a></em><span> and, most recently, </span><em><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Balancing-Act-Creating-Dependency-Connection-ebook/dp/B0F88WPPGC/?_encoding=UTF8&amp;pd_rd_w=xZOUD&amp;content-id=amzn1.sym.3a079c4e-f938-40c9-a0ed-01ef0e9528e9&amp;pf_rd_p=3a079c4e-f938-40c9-a0ed-01ef0e9528e9&amp;pf_rd_r=141-9976842-2413604&amp;pd_rd_wg=55qCM&amp;pd_rd_r=31355ab1-c4f9-46b4-add9-4e0679c609c7"><span>The Balancing Act</span></a><span>. </span></em><span>A sought-after relationship expert, she has practiced relationship therapy for almost 20 years.</span></p><p><strong><span>In this episode we talk about:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><span>The difference between healthy dependency and full-blown enmeshment</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why your attachment style is useful information, not a life sentence</span></p></li><li><p><span>Wise compassion versus what Buddhists call &#8220;idiot compassion&#8221;</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why you can&#8217;t force someone else to change, but your own change might be contagious</span></p></li><li><p><span>The &#8220;silent agreements&#8221; we make in relationships without ever saying them out loud &#8212; and how they quietly build resentment</span></p></li><li><p><span>Why over-considering everyone else&#8217;s needs backfires, and how to actually advocate for your own</span></p></li><li><p><span>How to stop dragging old relationship trauma into brand-new relationships</span></p></li><li><p><span>What to actually do if you feel lonely, or like you don&#8217;t have enough friends</span></p></li></ul><p><strong><span>Related Episodes:</span></strong></p><ul><li><p><a href="https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/how-to-handle-family-drama-nedra-glover-tawwab/id1087147821?i=1000598535657"><span>How to Handle Family Drama | Nedra Glover Tawwab</span></a></p></li><li><p><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4P_YpKjaIXE"><span>That Rut You&#8217;re In &#8211; This One Word Could Pull You Out | Nedra Tawwab</span></a></p></li></ul>]]></content:encoded></item><item><title><![CDATA[You’re Invited: An Actually Enjoyable Meditation Retreat ]]></title><description><![CDATA[Join Me, Sebene Selassie, and Jeff Warren&#8212;October 16-18]]></description><link>https://danharris.substack.com/p/youre-invited-an-actually-enjoyable</link><guid isPermaLink="false">https://danharris.substack.com/p/youre-invited-an-actually-enjoyable</guid><dc:creator><![CDATA[Dan Harris]]></dc:creator><pubDate>Sun, 02 Aug 2026 10:30:25 GMT</pubDate><enclosure url="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!kty2!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1281c27a-fc30-4fef-8768-3a428f8ee48b_3993x2079.jpeg" length="0" type="image/jpeg"/><content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><span>Meditation retreats have produced some of the most meaningful experiences and insights of my life. But they can also be daunting. First, it can be hard to find the time, given that so many retreats are 5 to 14 days, or even longer. And once you&#8217;re there, the hardest part can be actually doing the thing. A nonstop schedule of silent meditation and spartan meals from 5:30 in the morning until 10 at night. Giddy-up.</span></p><p><span>Which is why I have worked with my friends Sebene Selassie and Jeff Warren to come up with a new kind of retreat. One that&#8217;s actually fun. And short! This is not a knock on the more hardcore retreats. Those are also great. But they&#8217;re definitely not the only way.</span></p><p><span>This is a long windup to an invitation for you. This </span><strong><span>October 16th through the 18th</span></strong><span>, Jeff, Seb, and I will be putting on our annual </span><strong><a href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party"><span>Meditation Party event at the Omega Institute</span></a></strong><span>, a beautiful campus in the Hudson Valley, north of New York City.</span></p><div class="captioned-image-container"><figure><a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" target="_blank" href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party" data-component-name="Image2ToDOM"><div class="image2-inset"><picture><source type="image/webp" srcset="/__u/substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!kty2!, /__u/danharris.substack.com/w_424, /__u/danharris.substack.com/c_limit, /__u/danharris.substack.com/f_webp, /__u/danharris.substack.com/q_auto:good, /__u/danharris.substack.com/fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F1281c27a-fc30-4fef-8768-3a428f8ee48b_3993x2079.jpeg 424w, 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class="image-caption"><em>Reckless conviviality with mindfulness superfriends</em></figcaption></figure></div><p><span>Here&#8217;s how it goes: We kick things off on Friday night with a relaxed session of meditation, conversation, and Q&amp;A. Then on Saturday, there&#8217;s a morning session, followed by a bunch of free time, where you can eat, hike, do yoga, or get a massage. Then we do an afternoon session. On Saturday night, there&#8217;s an optional dance party. And then Sunday morning, we conclude with another session, one where we actually bring volunteers up on stage to chop it up with us.</span></p><p><span>The whole deal is quick, casual, and super fun. We will walk you through a bunch of different flavors of meditation, so you can get a sense of which styles work for you. We will answer your questions about how to practice&#8212;and how to integrate meditative principles into your daily life. You&#8217;ll also get a chance to meet other people who take this weird and transformative pursuit seriously. (But don&#8217;t worry, if you&#8217;re an introvert, you don&#8217;t have to talk to anybody.)</span></p><p><span>Do it for yourself&#8212;you deserve a break. But also, do it for the world. It&#8217;s dicey out there. In my opinion, it&#8217;s a genuine community service to get your head right. It fortifies you to be a beacon, in whatever little way you can, in a world on fire. See you in October. Xx</span></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Learn More About Meditation Party&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party"><span>Learn More About Meditation Party</span></a></p><div><hr></div><p><strong>What</strong>: Meditation Party with Dan Harris, Sebene Selassie &amp; Jeff Warren </p><p><strong>Where</strong>: Omega Institute, 150 Lake Drive, Rhinebeck, NY 12572</p><p><strong>When</strong>: Oct 16&#8211;18, 2026 (workshop begins Friday at 7:00 p.m.)</p><p><strong><span>How to Get There</span></strong><span>: </span><strong><a href="https://www.eomega.org/visit/visit/plan-your-trip"><span>Details here</span></a></strong><span> (there are lots of options)</span></p><p><strong>Please Note:</strong><span> </span><em><span>Meditation Party is one of Omega&#8217;s most popular workshops and will likely have more than 300 participants. Register early to secure your seat and housing.</span></em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Register Now&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party"><span>Register Now</span></a></p><div><hr></div><h3 style="text-align: center;"><em>&#8220;All the good, fun, connection-y parts of meditation with none of the performative and spiritual bullshit.&#8221;</em></h3><h4>What Past Attendees Are Saying</h4><blockquote><p>&#8220;This was my first ever meditation retreat, and I really enjoyed it... I will probably do this retreat again next year.&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;I love everything about this experience.&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;I felt seen for the first time in my life. Thank you so much.&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;I found my tribe and I plugged deeply into that. Mad love!&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;So connected. Connected to so many new, open, interesting people. And connected to myself. More than I had hoped for.&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;I hit pause on the chaos and to-do lists of life. I also meditated my ass off.&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;Fun, thoughtful, irreverent immersion into loving meditation.&#8221;<em> </em></p><p>&#8220;Y&#8217;all brought the practice down into lived experience and generally lightened and lifted the load.&#8221; </p><p>&#8220;You&#8217;ll leave with a contact high.&#8221;</p></blockquote><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Learn More&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="https://www.eomega.org/workshops/meditation-party"><span>Learn More</span></a></p><div><hr></div><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/subscribe?&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Subscribe now&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:null}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/subscribe"><span>Subscribe now</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em>Enjoying this newsletter? Send it to a friend.</em></p><p class="button-wrapper" data-attrs="{&quot;url&quot;:&quot;https://danharris.substack.com/p/hacks-for-overthinkers?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozNDYxNjczMjYsInBvc3RfaWQiOjIwNzQyMzgyMSwiaWF0IjoxNzg0ODk5NzYzLCJleHAiOjE3ODc0OTE3NjMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yNzIzNTM0Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.vaOCvd4DJXrVereMKlbrJ8QKk7BjNIlAwastSskeuGg&quot;,&quot;text&quot;:&quot;Share&quot;,&quot;action&quot;:null,&quot;class&quot;:&quot;button-wrapper&quot;}" data-component-name="ButtonCreateButton"><a class="button primary button-wrapper" href="/__u/danharris.substack.com/p/hacks-for-overthinkers?utm_source=substack&amp;utm_medium=email&amp;utm_content=share&amp;action=share&amp;token=eyJ1c2VyX2lkIjozNDYxNjczMjYsInBvc3RfaWQiOjIwNzQyMzgyMSwiaWF0IjoxNzg0ODk5NzYzLCJleHAiOjE3ODc0OTE3NjMsImlzcyI6InB1Yi0yNzIzNTM0Iiwic3ViIjoicG9zdC1yZWFjdGlvbiJ9.vaOCvd4DJXrVereMKlbrJ8QKk7BjNIlAwastSskeuGg"><span>Share</span></a></p><p style="text-align: center;"><em><span>And please check out my new </span><a href="http://danharris.com/">website</a><span> and consider following us on </span><a href="https://www.youtube.com/@TenPercentHappier">YouTube</a><span>.</span></em></p>]]></content:encoded></item></channel></rss>