By David Glenn Cox

In a strange turn of events, Ox News’s “Money Honey” Maria Bartiromo was suddenly fired from her multimillion-dollar job. Maria was one of the old-timers at Ox News. She remembers the good ole days of Bill O’Reilly, Meghan Kelly, and Tucker Carlson. The story goes that back in July, when Mr. Trump gave one of his unhinged “Crazy Talks.” Telling his tales and fantastic fallacies of stolen elections. Management at Ox News was sensitive to the topic in light of their huge legal settlements. The Ox brass then generated a memo to all department heads and principals.

Stay away from the crazy talk! Ignore Mr. Trump and his wild, unproven claims. It seemed reasonable, enough. Just don’t touch it. Leave it alone and just lie about something else for a while. But there is some slight confusion here. Either the White House noticed that Ox News wasn’t giving their story the full Rah, Rah treatment and called Bartiromo to find out why. She was one of Mr. Trump favorites after all, despite her advancing age. Or Ms. Bartiromo freely volunteered the information to the White Palace staff. In either case, Mr. Trump was quickly hopping mad about it and on the phone to the Ox News chief of staff. Good job Don! You just got your girl fired.

Bartiromo got exactly what she deserved. You can’t babble company secrets to outsiders. Rupert Murdoch was paying her millions of dollars just to read a teleprompter, and she told tales out of school. It is a question of loyalty, even teenagers working at Dominoes’ Pizza understand, and Bartiromo failed at it. I hope she saved her money. Loose lips sink careers and ships. Who will hire her now? How can she ever be trusted with company secrets? When her full allegiance belongs to another.

If only this were your usual case of Ox News misbehavior. Sexual impropriety, harassment, or drunken buffoonery. But this wasn’t just telling anyone’s secrets; it was the boss’s secrets! So Maria is gone like yesterday’s lunch. Management waited patiently for just the right moment to put her ass out on the side of the road. So they fired her on a Thursday before a long holiday weekend. Gone on Friday and forgotten by Monday. Rumors quickly circulated that Bartiromo was in line to be the next White Palace press secretary. But it was only wishful thinking as Bartiromo is far too old to work in the Trump White Palace. At 58, Ms. Bartiromo is nearly twenty years too old for the Trump administration.

Besides, reading bullshit off a teleprompter is a different skill entirely from insulting reporters with condescending personal attacks. Bartiromo was pulling down a cool ten million dollars a year sucking at the tit of Ox News. Could she take a job now for a measly hundred thousand? Plus all you can steal. A job requiring travel, wholesale insanity, and lots and lots of unpleasant work. She was once a queen at Ox News. Maria was their one lone surviving celebrity, was.

Maybe it’s something in the air as Republican Thom Tillis calls for the removal of Duh, fence Secretary Petey Hegseth. We’re back in a shooting war in Iran again. It’s only a question of time now. Any day now the realization will come down on Mr. Trump like a burning tire around his neck. The public anger and blame has only two possible landing locations. Either on Mr. Trump’s broad shoulders or on Petey’s, or as Ox News once called him, “Colonel Vodka.” Either thee or me. So Pete is gone, even though it hasn’t happened yet.

Prepare yourself; Mr. Trump calls those reporting of low munitions treasonous scum. Then insists the reporters should earn long jail sentences for leaking such sensitive information. Or, it’s not true! Even if it is! Reports saying the Pentagon hit a wedding party in Iran are discounted largely because they would prefer them not to be true. The administration’s plans to starve Iran to the peace table with an economic D-day lasted approximately one week.

In response to Iran striking one ship (FIVE ships) with missiles the administration claimed Iran no longer has. The US went back to shooting our own missiles, which we no longer have. The economic D-day plan is all gone and forgotten. That is your true north indicator. Because the plan might change at a moment’s notice, from twelve AM to twelve PM, from shooting to sanctions and from sanctions to shooting. It means there never really was a plan. Colonel Vodka is winging it.

Just when you thought the trade war with Canada couldn’t get any worse. Ontario Premier Doug Ford announced a 25% tariff on electricity exported to the Untied Snakes. Affecting roughly 8 to 14 million Americans the tariff is estimated to add $100 to the monthly family electric bill. Don’t forget to say, “Thank you, Donald Trump!” Ford also emphasized that if Mr. Trump continues with this nonsense. Mr. Ford won’t hesitate to turn the power off entirely. Who had the US and Canada going to war on their bingo card?

For decades, international investors automatically chose American treasury notes to park their wealth based entirely on the stability of the United States. That stability is rapidly becoming a thing of the past. Thanks to Donald Trump, now investors are becoming hesitant. Maybe South Korea or China, would be a safer bet? Those crazy Americans elected Donald Trump twice and haven’t been able to remove him even once! For someone parking hundreds of millions of dollars, that is a huge risk to take. Best to look elsewhere, maybe until the US gets its house in order. Or, how Donald Trump destroyed the American economy.

The only thing that scares me more than a falling stock market in good times, is a soaring stock market in questionable times. Squeezing the last juice from the lemon or robbing the purser’s safe before the ship goes down. Licking the spoon for the last bits of the sugary frosting.

“Just as there are physical monsters, can there not be mental or psychic monsters born? The face and body may be perfect, but if a twisted gene or malformed egg can produce physical monsters, may not the same process produce a malformed soul?

Monsters are variations from the accepted normal to a greater or a less degree. As a child may be born without an arm, so one may be born without kindness or the potential of conscience. A man who loses his arms in an accident has a great struggle to adjust himself to the lack, but one born without arms suffers only from people who find him strange. Having never had arms, he cannot miss them. To a monster the norm must seem monstrous, since everyone is normal to himself. To the inner monster it must be even more obscure, since he has no visible thing to compare with others. To a criminal, honesty is foolish. You must not forget that a monster is only a variation, and that to a monster the norm is monstrous.” ― John Steinbeck,

By David Glenn Cox

We have this little pipsqueak Congress critter here in Arizona. You never hear his name in the news for introducing legislation. He campaigns almost non-stop year-round. Then, out of the blue (pun intended) a TV ad will pop up for Juan Ciscomani. A reactionary Republican, so far up Donald Trump’s butt, Trump has to fart in the morning to wake him up. Juan votes with Donald Trump 100% of the time. All he needs is a wooden handle, a rubber face and an ink stamp pad.

But it’s one of those early, easily missed little indicators. Juan is advertising himself this time around as “Bipartisan.” He votes with the President 100% of the time but wants us to believe he’s bipartisan. It’s suddenly not hip or groovy to be attached at Trump’s hip anymore.

Tucker Fucker Carlson ambles down that long lonesome Bill O’Reilly trail. Former OX News hosts meandering towards obscurity after losing the “big” OX News job. Mistaking celebrity for relative importance, Trucker interviews Vladimir Putin because he needs to stay relevant and keep his name in the media conversation. Besides, that’s what useful idiots do. Do you suppose there was a line forming of American journalists waiting to interview Putin? Nope, they all want a future!

But Tucker fucker made an ominous statement the other day, mainly, just trying to look relevant and sound intelligent. The United States will either become a right wing authoritarian state or there will be a revolution. He’s a little late to the fascist party, don’t think? Maybe he could modify his remark, to The United States will continue down the road of Reich wing authoritarianism or there will be a revolution. It’s unknown exactly which road Mr. Carlson favors. Say something outrageous quick, before you disappear entirely! It’s the old broken clock rule. If you have an old broken clock, it’s probably not worth a shit.

Whenever someone mentions a second American Revolution. I always ask the same question. “Who do we shoot first?” Throw tea into Boston Harbor, maybe? Picket lines outside the River Rouge Ford plant? It was a remark designed to get the rednecks excited to get their guns and pay attention to Tucker for another five minutes. But the message has changed. The message is no longer about Donald Trump. The new message is: What do they do now, after Trump? Donald Trump is already in their rearview mirror. What Tucker is actually asking is for More Trump or revolution. “Give me Fascism or give me death!”

I was curious when Jeff Bezos produced his biopic about Malaria Trump. A subject as dull and empty as an Alabama library. I understood that it was a bribe, but why bribe Malaria? Why wasn’t the film about Cankles McBrainfreeze? Why about the wife and not about the kingpin? I thought to myself maybe Cankles was just trying to be nice to her. No, not Cankles. There had to be some other reason. Then, with the public arrival and acceptance of Natalie Harp, the reason became clear. The film was Malaria’s severance package. Here’s your last check, your services are no longer required. Pack your shit and be out by five o’clock. And take what’s his name, your anchor baby with you! Daddy’s got a new girlfriend now. He’s traded in a 53 for a 35. But what did Donald Trump get out of this crooked deal? Donald got rid of Malaria, thanks Jeff!

Somehow the Christian conservatives and Bible-spouting lovers of Christ have no particular feelings either way about a man publicly humiliating his lawful wife and nine foot tall boy child.

Jerimiah 13:27 your adulteries and lustful neighings, your shameless prostitution! I have seen your detestable acts on the hills and in the fields. Woe to you, Jerusalem! How long will you be unclean?”

Duh, what? That’s why Jesus will never return. They would crucify him immediately on the White House lawn and charge admission or put it up on pay-per-view.

Bill Clinton had an affair in the White House, and it was headlines for months and months. Donald Trump has an affair in the White House and it’s barely mentioned. A week later, it’s forgotten entirely. Yeah, so what?

Donald Trump announces that this time Iran is really going to get it! Six months ago, he promised the same thing. Three months ago he promised the same thing. It is a complete Orwellian nonsense statement. Each attack is twice as devastating as the attack before, until it is an attack squared or cubed. The story is already out. Peckerhead Pete has already fired off all the missiles and gutted the Pentagon. As Trump blusters that this time will be even worse! Fooling no one, let alone the Iranians.

But the Iranians complain the US is now attacking civilian targets. Would the US under Donald Trump and Peckerhead Hegseth do such a dastardly thing and commit war crimes? Obviously, yes; they would. Meanwhile, at the G20 meeting in North Carolina, snotty Scotty Bessent got his hair dyed special just for the occasion. Scotty, in true Trumpian fashion, declined to give press credentials to The New York Times and Bloomberg News. Then the funniest thing happened. Mr. Bessent gave his speech at the G20, but no press outlets were available or interested in covering it. And he got his hair all done up for nothing!

It is almost perfect. The Treasury will mint a one-dollar coin with Donald Trump’s scowling face on it. What a great idea! Why didn’t someone think of it before? The one-dollar coin sells for $1.50. It’s a Trump coin, what did you expect? A deal? A dollar? It is one of the direct advantages of marketing to morons. A roll of fifty coins is $61.00 and a bag of a hundred coins is $154.50. Now ask yourself, who or why someone would buy a bag of one hundred Trump coins?

These things are required like hell needs a city limit marker to differentiate the real estate. Less than two years in, and it’s all falling apart. Secretary of the Army Dan Driscoll resigns and tells Trump that Hegseth has fired 20% of the Pentagon brain trust. And Trump reportedly answered, “Really?”

“The hottest places in hell are reserved for those who, in times of great moral crisis, maintain their neutrality.” ― Dante Alighieri, The Inferno

By David Glenn Cox

A funny thing happened on the way to the war in Iran. If you ask the Trump junta or any of the major American mutated media outlets. “Gee, what’s going on with the war in the Persian Gulf?” You’ll get one story, one answer, no matter who you ask. A story of American military dominance and efficiency against an Iranian adversary, just barely managing to hang on. Ask any of them.

Thanks to the mighty US Navy the Strait of Hormuz is open and traffic is flowing normally. But somewhere between larceny and insanity, not everyone got the message. MS. Now will tell you, and so will OX News, the US struck missile launchers on Larak Island in retaliation for the Iranians striking ONE cargo vessel in the Strait of Hormuz. One, as in Uno! One single unfortunate vessel hit by a dastardly errant Iranian missile. But in the end, we sure showed them who was boss!

But the propaganda stream was channeled only in one direction. The mongrel media lapped up the story and regurgitated it to a waiting public unreservedly. But they forgot one. One tiny little outlet that doesn’t point outward towards the general public. A trade paper (website) pointing inward geared towards those actually in the maritime business. The Shipping News says at least FIVE tankers have been hit with Iranian missiles. Or the US is only admitting to 20% of the actual losses.

The strait is currently a shooting gallery. Travel at your own risk, because when asked if anyone has seen the mighty US Navy recently? The answer was a resounding “No!” No sign of them. You see? What they tell the waiting, gullible public is a different story than what they say in the trades. Could it be true? Would the Trump regime mislead a gullible public about an unpopular war? You bet they would! Oil prices just keep ticking up incrementally about three-tenths of a percent per day. And if the full scope of the war ever became common knowledge. It could be Katy bar the door.

At least FIVE ships, not one, that are in the Persian Gulf in various states of damage and or on fire. Now add in the two of the at least twenty-five MQ-9 Reaper drones recently shot down by the Iranians and the picture begins to morph and look different. From American military and media dominance to an out of control free for all. The news from Pearl Harbor: Everything’s fine. No problems here! But there is still significant traffic moving in the Gulf. The price of oil on the spot-market is soaring, no matter what that nice man in the fancy clothes and funny haircut on TV says.

A hazard premium of up to $650,000 can be earned per day if the ship-owners are willing to take a few chances. It’s not just the price of the oil; it’s also the cost of transportation as well. It’s the fog of war, that’s what it is. No, it’s the fog of Trump. When the going gets tough, the tough lie about it. What war? Oh, you mean that little skirmish? That little three-day special military operation? No problem! Everything is under control. You boys and girls can settle down now; Uncle Donnie has things well in hand. Ask our Duh fence secretary Peterless Pete. Gee, where did he go all of a sudden? He was here just a second ago, promoting truth, justice, and the American way. With that arrogant, proud certainty he’s becoming famous for. But someone might ask him a question, someone doesn’t want to answer.

Now add in the Houthis strikes in the Red Sea and suddenly the war looks begins to look different. I know, I know, big news flash. The Trump regime lied! Think of the lengths they went to hide something as mundane and meaningless as the deflecting pool scandal. Now consider the lengths the misadministration would go to in attempting to hide something as serious as a war. A war that they are losing! But they can still win it on cable TV! The professional propaganda merchants ask innocent, naïve little questions. “Now that we’ve stolen Venezuela’s oil reserves, how long before my gas prices come down?” Not long. The second Tuesday of next week maybe, or sometime before the twelfth of never. Some future decade down the road.

The whole Venezuela announcement was about creating the smoke of propaganda. See! See! There’s good news everyone! Maybe they even thought they could fool a few insiders and stop oil’s relentless march towards real economic hardship. No luck; nobody bought the cover story, and the price of oil just keeps creeping higher.

But the Trump regime has a plan. No, wait, they had a plan, but it didn’t work out. Now the plan is to lie repeatedly and pretend the war is not really there. And until they can figure something out, they will impose harsh sanctions on innocent third parties! There! That’ll fix it! We’ll sanction China and teach Iran a harsh lesson they won’t soon forget.

You can see the administration is torn. They want the oil to flow, but don’t want to risk any bad news headlines. Officially, under a Trump pronouncement, the US Navy is enacting a counter-blockade to starve out the Iranians. But according to the Shipping News, no one has seen any US Navy vessels recently, so the Iranian blockade is a myth of questionable merit. The administration dare not risk any super-expensive military assets to negative headlines, too large to be kept from the public. They also serve who run away and hide.

You see, we don’t have to really patrol the Persian Gulf. We can just say that we are, and who will be any the wiser? Just add a little spin control and stir. The administration has told us ad nauseum about how they’ve crushed the Iranian air force at least three times over. Yet Iran bombed our airbase in Saudi Arabia with jets. Obsolete jets, no less.

Two trains left the station at approximately the same time. One train was headed east, driven by the Federal Reserve, calling for higher interest rates to fight inflation. The other train headed west, driven by China, calling for higher interest rates to spur investment. Investment in China, and not in the US. Where is the safest place to invest their money now? China under Xe or the United States under Donald Trump? China is slowly backing the US bond market into a corner. And the kicker is China didn’t even need to lie about it. Invest here, for stability! Or trust your money to the whims of Donald Trump.

“Political language is designed to make lies sound truthful and murder respectable, and to give an appearance of solidity to pure wind. ” ― George Orwell

By David Glenn Cox

The President of the United States is a serial rapist, a child rapist. A thief and a career criminal. The federal court ordered the Justice Department to produce the FBI notes from the thirteen-year-old alleged to have been raped by Donald Trump. The Department of Justice’s answer was short and sweet. “No!” And what are you going to do about it? That’s what I thought…“Nothing!”

The President defect tears down the east wing of the White House without asking anyone. With plans to build a grandiose ballroom. The law was as plain as the nose on your face. The President is a tenant and not an owner. He has no right to change anything. But the corporate Supreme Court answers, “That’s fine, just let him do it.” Mussolini made the trains run on time, and Trump keeps the taxes low on the 1%. They will let him do anything and are now powerless to stop him, anyway.

Not since the Fuhrer’s Reichstag has a legislative body been so feckless, weak-kneed and powerless. Fuck the country! Think about your personal wealth! The dictator, King Trump the horrible, steals the wealth of the nation of Venezuela. In much the same way, the German Fuhrer planned the invasion of Russia. Russia had things the German Fuhrer wanted, so he killed the people and took them at gunpoint. Take off the blinders and see American Fascism on the march! Concentration camps, unprovoked, unjustified invasions, missile attacks, threats, and coerced agreements. The only damn difference between them is in the moustache and the orange face paint.

Harry Truman fired one army general in eight years. Pete Headsled fired the top army general and his three most likely replacements in less than two. Argue with the Fuhrer and you’ll get canned! Then the Army Secretary resigns, effective immediately. Leaving a gaping hole in the Army leadership, Ten, four-star generals and five have either left or been removed. What could possibly go wrong? Ask Joe Stalin what could go wrong? It’s not a brain drain so much as a brain enema. We don’t need a bunch of know-it-all generals hanging around; trying to tell us what to do! I’ve watched John Wayne on TV! “What do you mean, we’re almost out of missiles?”

Last month it was the navy, and an aircraft carrier running out of food. Oh, I can see it now. If the generals all quit, the colonels will begin to quit. Then the captains and the majors will begin to quit. Love your Fascism and support the troops, even if this misadministration doesn’t support the troops. King Donald the worst said they weren’t on station for long enough. Let them eat cake!

But megalomania is a progressive illness. It starts out simple enough, and before long, the victim believes they can build towers to the sun and make the tides come in on command. But eventually, there is the overreach. Napoleon in Russia, Hitler in Russia, LBJ in Vietnam and Trump in Iran. Distance is distance, it is immutable and unchanging. Iran is six thousand miles away, and that means we must first travel six thousand miles to confront them.

We are the aggressors; all Iran is required to do is simply not surrender. We must jump through hoops while they stay home. We must conquer while they must only survive. It is unsustainable, as current events clearly show. Yesterday, the Iranians claimed to have shot down two MQ-9 Reaper drones at an everyday low, low price of $32 million dollars apiece. It’s only money! Wait a minute, what am I thinking? The Congress has invoked the War Powers Act. Then they put their heads back down on their desks and went back to sleep. Make noise, yes! Actually challenge der Fuhrer? Oh, God, no!

JD Vance went to Michigan to campaign. Why? Does JD have some connection to Michigan? Does Michigan like Ohio State? But like my mother once said, find something good in everyone. JD Vance makes Mike Pence look good! I mean, would you take a job where your predecessor was almost murdered and set upon by an angry mob inspired by your boss?

Such is Fascism; steal yourself rich. Pluck the gold bars out of the fire. Plunder, plunder, plunder!

The angry mongrel media foist stories on the public of the economic troubles in Iran. Do they have any reporters in Iran? No. Then how do they know? They don’t! They just make it up and none can argue. Welcome to the Brave New World, John.

There is one superhero in this collection of thugs and stumblebums. An invisible man! A man with no actual existence. A man so forlorn and overlooked, they leave him out of group photos. It was once the job of Thomas Jefferson, and today the Secretary of State is a job for George Jefferson. Little Marco Rubio is a secretary, without portfolio. A little man with a big title and big shoes, but without an actual job description. The President defect sends his bagmen, Witkoff and Kushner, to collect. If it’s really important, he sends the head of the CIA. Foreign policy? There is none. There is only a list of possible real estate acquisitions.

King Donald the worst, aka Donald the bastard, has effectively destroyed the United States. Its Congress and its court system. And now, he’s coming for your vote. Just remember the General Strike begins on the first Wednesday after the stolen election.

Neville Chamberlain told Churchill after the declaration of war that he wouldn’t live to ever see his country at peace again. Likewise, it’s going to take at least twenty years, if ever, to untangle and recover from this catastrophe. The war in Iran was lost before it was ever started. The age-old Fuhrer thinking of “I’ll just kick in the front door and the whole rotten structure will collapse.” Napoleon’s dash towards Moscow. LBJ bombing the Ho Chi Minh trail. Their reach was beyond their grasp.

But prepare yourself for the horror show. What you see of the rot and ruin today, is only fraction of it.
“Wir wussten es nicht. Wir haben nur Befehle
befolgt!”

See the sky about to rain? Wall Street is becoming concerned. Monetary problems a go, go and Scott Bessent in charge. Canadian tariffs and Argentine beef, King Donald the turd punching the red states right in the nose. The tree of liberty is dying.

“AMATEURISHNESS WAS ONE OF HITLER’S DOMINANT TRAITS. He had never learned a profession and basically had always remained an outsider to all fields of endeavor. Like many self-taught people, he had no idea what real specialized knowledge meant.” ― Albert Speer

By David Glenn Cox

It is a headline from a Russian newspaper. One scary headline among the many, but the question is. Could this be internal propaganda designed only to stiffen the resolve among the suffering Russian civilians? Or is this something more? International subliminal messaging of a barking dog getting ready to bite? Other Russian editorials claim that only retaliation and escalation will work. NATO must be taught a lesson! Their failure, as they see it, is all our doing!

Ukraine has successfully brought the war home to Russia. Forcing the public to see through the smoke and haze of internal politics. The public has been told for over four years that Russia was winning the war. But Wild berries and the oil refineries in flames say otherwise. Vladimir Putin looks impotent in the face of drone attacks. So they generate threatening, aggressive-sounding propaganda to salve over their wounds. “Oh yeah! Just you wait! You’ll see! You’re gonna get yours!”

But John Radcliffe didn’t fly all the way to Russia for internal politics. Somebody, somewhere in the bowels of the Pentagon thinks they’re serious. President Cankles McBrainfreeze is left entirely out of the operation. Strange, huh? The Commander-in-Chief, Billy Big Mouth, has nothing to say about it? “Shut him up before he gets us all killed!” Cankles is angry because they won’t let him make a speech at the 911 memorial. They won’t let him make the memorial for over three thousand dead Americans about himself, so Cankles the clown will now punish New York City and NOT show up for the memorial. Take that, New York! That’s New York, one and Cankles, zero.

Abraham Lincoln once famously said, “One war at a time.” Not Cankles, a trade war with Canada. A shooting war with Iran and an economic war on Wall Street. If they burn the deck chairs, they can keep the steam up for a few more days. Yesterday, the US military attacked Iranian “missile launchers.” Iran retaliated with missile strikes on US assets in Qatar and Jordan, as well as hitting an oil tanker in the Strait of Hormuz. But shh, don’t tell anyone, it’s a secret. Only good news is allowed, Winston!

President McBrainfreeze has negotiated a new oil deal with Venezuela. It’s not known if any Venezuelan officials were allowed to be present during the negotiations. Sign here! The mongrel media lap it up. A Trumpian triumph asking, “How long until oil prices fall?” Venezuelan crude oil is thick like tar, and it’s best used for heating oil and heavy lubricants, not gasoline. Hence, despite Cankles proud proclamation, world oil prices continue to rise. It’s estimated it will take billions of dollars and at least a decade to bring Venezuelan infrastructure up to date. American oil executives offered the exclusive chance of a lifetime in Venezuela, declined to participate.

Wall Street trembles under the weight of massive borrowing for speculative data center projects. Billions upon billions of dollars in loans, and not one dollar of profit anywhere to be seen. But one of these days, boy, it’s going to be great! Someday they’ll turn a profit, maybe. You’ll see! Just you wait! The economic numbers are bad. Inflation and high interest rates with zero job growth. And now, with Canada imposing dollar for dollar, reciprocal tariffs. The economic future looks bleak. Wall Street stands on the deck of a sinking ship and dreams about how great the rescue ship is going to be when it finally arrives. If it arrives at all.

Never have so few spent so much or borrowed so much on mere speculation. On the anticipation of a gold strike without a single flake of gold ever having been found. Now, as history explains, the roots of the Great Republican Depression of 1929 were caused by speculation on credit. People were buying stocks on credit. Put ten dollars down and get a hundred dollars in stocks. Based entirely on the philosophy that if everyone can buy stocks, the prices will automatically rise. If everyone can invest in data centers, then where will the prices go? But what if the bloom never arrives? What if the bloom is less than expected?

Henry Ford famously built a two billion dollar rubber plantation in South America. Then a scientist in New Jersey with a test tube and $100,000 budget developed synthetic rubber. What if you build a ten billion dollar data center and some scientist somewhere comes up with a new chip that does a hundred times what the old chips do? That ten billion dollar data center can now fit in your wristwatch for $92.50. A ten billion dollar obsolete data center. Just look at this ancient technology! Gosh, how primitive. The same way we look at old Crosley tube radios today or Windows 97. Betting the house because it is all they have left to bet. Gambling for their clothes.

Betting the current technology won’t grow or be made obsolete overnight, before it’s all paid for.

It’s important to understand that when Russia threatens the West. The Russian army is depleted. Their navy is virtually useless, and their air force is antiquated. When they say escalate, they mean going to the next level. How strange it is during the most dangerous times since Cuba in 1962, Cankles McBrainfreeze is silent on the subject. Shoddy Scotty Bessant’s economic D-day plan raises the tensions, without solving any of the problems. Stuck without enough missiles to strike Iran, they strike at Iran’s economic allies. They make new enemies for the US instead.

Speaking of new enemies, Google, aka Gargle, hastens to swallow Mr. Trump’s syrup and change the name of Lake Ontario on their Gargle maps. Like a good little corporate tool with something brown on their nose. Oblivious to the point of Mitch McConnell brain dead. Gargle has missed what has happened to Elon’s little car company after getting in bed with Mr. Trump. From the hottest cars on the market to virtual boat anchors. And then there is the sad case of the “My Pillow Guy” Mike Lindell. Once one of Mr. Trump’s favorite suck-ups, worth over thirty million dollars. Now broke, disgraced, and Mr. Trump is no longer taking Lindell’s calls.

Let’s see? Gargle could either please Mr. Trump or please three or four hundred million people? Wanna buy a Cybertruck or a “My Pillow?” Wanna hire Rudy Giuliani, Michael Cohen or Pam Bondi? The taint doesn’t wash off; it’s like a tattoo, it remains forever. Look at See BS; they’ve destroyed their own business. Look at what happened to America Online, Gargle, and meet your future! They can too quickly be replaced at no additional cost!

“The world is filled with people who are no longer needed. And who try to make slaves of all of us. And they have their music and we have ours. Theirs, the wasted songs of a superstitious nightmare. And without their music and ideological miscarriages to compare our songs of freedom to, we’d not have any opposite to compare music with --- and like the drifting wind, hitting against no obstacle, we’d never know its speed, its power....” ― Woody Guthrie

By David Glenn Cox

How much money would be enough to satisfy you? One million dollars? Ten million? A billion? Mansions and wall to wall sycophants and call girls. Sumptuous food and private jets, and famous art on the wall? Would it make you happy? Considering that once you have acquired this fabulous lifestyle, you must now protect it and hold on to it tightly, or it might disappear. Such are the problems of human apes.

SoftBank has recently applied for a ten billion with a “B” dollar loan. Because they want to get in on the AI bonanza and fear they may already be too late. Gimme the money! Quick, quick, gimme the money! I was feeling poorly the other day, with no appetite, constipated, and with hot flashes. So I went on WebMD. And visited with Dr. AI. I described my symptoms, and Dr. AI instantly had the solution. Obviously, I was going through menopause. I knew as soon as I mentioned hot flashes, the machine would say something stupid like that. Even after insisting I was a bona fide, biological male, Dr AI asked if I would like them to put me in contact with a competent OBGYN?

Better make that a twenty billion dollar loan. There is still much work to be done. Far be it from me to question science and modern medical technology, but I suspect a misdiagnosis. It’s a machine; it doesn’t think, it simply chooses from a weighted multiple-choice palette. But it’s a dream, a gleam in the eye. Somebody is going to get rich someday maybe, if we can just get the damn thing to work right.

Meta, as in it doesn’t Meta any more. Aka Disgrace Book is betting heavily on AI and recently began a program to cull the herd of those pesky flesh and blood humans. Now, this isn’t a company teetering on the brink of bankruptcy, desperate to cut payroll. This is a company that literally prints money. Anxious, desperate to eliminate as many as possible of those over-paid humans. So that they can keep more of those precious pennies in their pockets. At the annual company meeting held at Mr. Zuckerberg’s Hawaii compound, the goal was announced to eliminate up to 20% of the current meat bags and replace them all with AI.

As the AI was being implemented, bugs, and reliability issues began to surface. Were you recently banned from Disgrace book for posting pictures of your car, your cat or your mother? You see? “Not See” becomes “Nazi!” What happens in a company when it becomes clear that the boss has it in for you? All of your coming in early or staying late means nothing. You’re an important member of our team, almost like family! Important in that you draw a paycheck and must be eliminated just as soon as we can get this damn shit working right. Can you come in this weekend to help us eliminate your job?

The call rings down the halls and corridors, abandon ship! No future here! Dead-end on Zuckerberg street! The good eject themselves before the aircraft goes down in flames. The remainder live in fear and hide behind their desks when they see the boss coming on Fridays. Caught in a vise of their own making, with company morale at the level of a prison yard. “Psst, me and Lenny are going over the wall tonight.”

In the old days; they called this plan strangling the goose laying the golden eggs. But the white shirts and MBAs today use terms like human asset optimization and payroll streamlining. That way they can make more money! Replace all those heartbeats with digital decimal points ASAP! And if it doesn’t work too well? Who cares? Remembering that famous Russian efficiency expert, Dr. Goodenough. Customer service? You must be joking. The morons and peons will never notice the difference. And if they do? Fuck em! Who cares what they think!

Whenever a company sets out to improve profits, care and customer satisfaction generally go right out the window first. I had a friend who was an assistant plant manager at a frozen Pizza factory. The new owners decided to go with cheaper ingredients, and my friend began sending out resumes’. Those pimply-faced peons will never notice the difference. The layoffs began in less than a year and then the company decided it was time to revert to the better ingredients, but it was already too late. Time and customers lost are never found.

When I was a boy, I wanted a slot car so I could go to the slot car track with the big kids. Then all the slot car tracks shut down. When I was a little older, I’d plunk quarters into the video game arcade at the shopping mall. What’s a video game arcade? What’s a shopping mall? Time marches on, leaving business geniuses and MBAs behind in the gutter.

Who would have ever dreamed such industry giants as Kodak or RCA would disappear? Western Auto used to have a store in every mid-sized town in America. They paid their salespeople on salary and commission. Then the bosses came up with this genius idea. Get rid of the commission! We’ll save a bundle! Is there a Western Auto store in your town today? That’s why!

My Brother in law worked at an axle foundry in Alabama. One hundred and twenty-five degrees inside that forge shop. Some of the executives would step out onto the loading dock to smoke and complain about the ninety-degree heat of the day. Completely clueless of their co-workers working inside the fires of hell less than three hundred feet away. “Gosh, but it sure is hot out here today!”

It’s something similar to the Stanford experiment where the guards become careless and oblivious to the needs of the inmates. The executives got where they are because of their genius and cleverness. Everyone else is just a worthless fuckwad. “Gosh, I know how to improve profits, boss! Do you see those two guys? Fire one of them and make the other one work twice as fast. Outsource our inbound calls to India! Fire all the salespeople! Use AI! Our customers are all morons anyway and won’t know the damn difference. Thank you for calling. Your call is very important to us. Due to heavier than expected call volume, your expected wait time is approximately one hour and thirty-two minutes. Enjoy listening to this one lame song, over and over and over again, sucker! “Delta Dawn! What’s that flower you have on!”

There’s only one serious drawback to Artificial Intelligence. The public hates it! YouTube already advertises “No AI” on some of its videos. But don’t worry, boss, they’ll learn to love it. After all, boss, they’re all just simple morons, anyway. Just cram it down their throats. We’re going to be rich someday, you know!

“Our civilization is wonderful, in certain spectacular ways; wonderful in the material inflation which it calls progress; wonderful in its hunger for money, and in its indifference as to how it is acquired; in closing the public service against brains and character; in electing purchasable legislatures, blatherskite Congresses, and city governments which rob the town and sell municipal protection to gamblers, thieves and prostitutes for cash.

It is a civilization which has destroyed the simplicity and repose of life; replaced its contentment, its poetry, its soft romance-dreams and visions with the money-fever, sordid ideals, vulgar ambitions, and the sleep which does not refresh.

It has invented a thousand useless luxuries, and turned them into necessities; it has created a thousand vicious appetites and satisfies none of them; it has dethroned God and set up a shekel in His place.” – Mark Twain

By David Glenn Cox

Renaming a great lake isn’t a trade negotiation tactic; it is an insult. How exactly will an insult advance our trade talks? ”Your Canadian mama is so fat, she has satellites orbiting around her ass.” It won’t help. It will only harden positions on both sides. An insult which is actually a symptom of a mental illness. But even more than questions surrounding Mr. Trump’s mental fitness, is the media fantasy representation of this act as somehow NORMAL presidential behavior.

“This just in: The President has officially renamed Paris, France, “Gooberville.” The media says stuff like this with a straight face, as if it happens all the time. “The President this morning stripped down naked, smearing his body with oleomargarine, and began dancing in the White House fountain. Reports say it was a very nice little dance, and Mr. Trump is considered to be an excellent dancer for a man of his size and years. Speaker of the House Mike Johnson exclaimed, “A man with all the problems of the world on his shoulders, who can still find time to dance! And can dance naked in a fountain better than any Democrats ever could!”

What lengths will the media go to trying to disguise dysfunction as democracy? Our CNN opinion poll finds the President is underwater. Oh, how I wish that were true! Quit trying to get my hopes up! But what they are doing is giving you a meaningless number which sort of supports what you might expect. While disguising the actual, unbelievably, appalling number. The President is under water by 26 points on the economy. What exactly does that mean? It means his numbers are so bad, they must disguise them from the public. They must create an unfathomable new scale to explain it all away. Mr. Trump is two boom, booms ahead of last year!

Mr. Trump’s polling numbers are lower than Richard Nixon’s polling numbers the week Nixon resigned from office! Did you hear about that in the mainstream news? The President’s wife has left him! You know this is perfect media star fodder, but silenced. Who is getting married? What celebrities are getting divorced? The President shows off his new girlfriend to the press, and the media report it as, “She seems very nice.”

Rich guys who’ve never been hunting or worked a single day in their lives suggest perhaps cattle ranches could butcher their own cattle to cut costs. Then they could jump in the truck and drive it down to the local Safeway in Tulsa or Tuscaloosa. A complete misunderstanding of how systems operate. A cattle rancher isn’t a butcher shop, nor do they want to be. It’s a different skill entirely. Perhaps to cut the high cost of airline tickets, we could stop requiring pilot’s licenses. Effective immediately: Anyone can rent an airplane and fly themselves anywhere they want to go. “This move is expected to save consumers millions of dollars.”

Believe it or not, Mr. Trump’s bizarre beef brew, ha ha, was designed to shore up his deteriorating polling numbers ahead of the midterm elections. Suddenly, Mr. Trump is obsessed with lowering beef prices. With no concern whatsoever for the war in Iran or rising fuel prices. The backlash has been brutal from Detroit to Dallas, and from Colorado to Cucamonga. The move is expected to cut beef prices by 25%. Why? How? When the wholesaler gets a special price, they might pass half of the savings on to the retailer. The retailer in turn passes little or none of its savings on to the consumers. Why should they? Beef freezes.

It will lower the cost of beef to below the cost of production. You don’t have to thank me; it’s my gift to you, America! The party of personal responsibility and government non-intervention in the free market single-handedly torpedoes the cattle industry. Do you see the madness at play here? These people don’t have a clue about what they’re doing. We could sell crude oil over the counter and let people refine it at home on the stove, and save a fortune! Cut all those greedy refineries out of the equation!

This is madness at play; let them eat cake! The President said today that if they won’t let him put his name on the Kennedy Center, he’s going to knock it all down. Media reports say this is all complexly normal. Similar to the time Woodrow Wilson threatened to fill in the Grand Canyon.

Mr. Trump has abandoned the Iran war in the same way someone colorblind abandons a Rubik’s cube. It’s just too damn difficult to solve, so he’ll fix beef prices instead. Leaving the war to his treasury Suckretary snotty Scotty Bessent, to solve with his economic D-day plan. Sanction anyone who does business with Iran. Bring every single country not currently involved in the crises, into the crisis. Brilliant! Punish innocent third parties states with no dog in the fight. I feel certain that when the smoke clears, those third party states will all take our side. President Big Mouth targets the People’s Republic of China for sanctions. “Hey! Since we’re having a war anyway, why not let’s make it a world war while we are at it?

China has nothing to do with Mr. Trump’s war with Iran. Involving them unnecessarily is economically reckless and politically dangerous. If you buy pottery from Mexico, we’re going to sanction computer chips! China has remained silent following the old Chinese proverb, “Never stop a fool at work when they are busy destroying themselves.”

And yes, there is also some good news out there, but for some peculiar reason only Ox News has covered it. The President has just signed a new oil agreement with Venezuela, through his clever negotiation skills and advanced weaponry. Huh, huh? “We’re going to make you an offer you can’t refuse! Sign here, or else prison! Similar in scope to the German Fuhrer’s 1939 trade agreement with Poland. Letting free markets work at gunpoint. The President announced today that he’s renaming the planet Earth. Henceforth, the Earth shall be known as “New Gangsterland.”

“While the President didn’t go into any great detail exactly why he’s renaming the planet, the changes are expected to take around a year. The President has also named himself as the eternal ruler of “New Gangsterland,” with the official title of “Omnipotent God of all the Universe.” Which seems completely justified and reasonable, considering Barack Obama once wore a tan suit in the oval office.

All hail, “New Gangsterland” and congratulations to Mr. Trump on his new and well-earned title.

“With school turning out more runners, jumpers, racers, tinkerers, grabbers, snatchers, fliers, and swimmers instead of examiners, critics, knowers, and imaginative creators, the word ‘intellectual,’ of course, became the swear word it deserved to be.” ― Ray Bradbury, Fahrenheit 451

By David Glenn Cox

The other day, Jared Kushner had a long private discussion with House Minority Whip Hakeem Jeffries. Strange bedfellows indeed. What subject could they possibly have in common to talk about? A month ago, the United States authorized Ukraine to build Patriot missiles under license. Now look at that from a Russian perspective. The US is giving direct aid to Ukraine, making Russian attacks less effective. Last week, the UK government signed off on Ukraine building their own Storm Shadow missiles.

Look at it from the other side. Russia has imported over a million artillery shells and hardware from North Korea and drones from Iran. Russia sees the issue differently. Seeing a big difference between importing basic military hardware, versus high technology weapons. High technology without any external control. Giving Ukraine the keys to the kingdom. They can build as many as they want and use them however they want.

CIA head John Radcliffe flew to Moscow for secret negotiations. I think I know now what Jared and Hakeem were discussing. There is some really dark shit on the horizon. Radcliffe flew to Moscow on a C-117 military aircraft. He could have flown to Moscow on one of a fleet of government civilian aircraft. If Krash Patel didn’t need them for date night. But Radcliffe flew on a military aircraft, because this was a military mission. And the US was making it clear this wasn’t just a friendly social call. Radcliffe was delivering a message from the US military directly to the highest levels of the Russian government. I wonder what it could be?

I had scoffed when I first heard the US cover story. Supposedly, Russia was planning an attack on a NATO country. I thought, ridiculous, sensational, impossible! Russia’s army has lost all of its tanks and armored personnel carriers. Their air force is an aging fleet of jets just as likely to fall from sky due to maintenance issues than from enemy missiles. Why attacking NATO would be tantamount to Russian suicide! Then, It began to dawn on me what Jared and Hakeem were most likely talking about. This was a private heads up. A direct message from the adults in the room to the other adults in the room.

The Russian economy is in tatters and nearing collapse. Suffering intense fuel shortages and a destroyed retail sector, the Russian public is becoming enraged at what it sees as a powerless plutocrat Putin. Winter comes early in Russia, and shortages of heating oil could spell death and disaster. Without any heating oil the populace will switch to electric space heaters, which will collapse the already weakened electrical grid. A vast humanitarian crisis, the likes of which has not been seen in Europe since the end of World War II.

Sun Tzu famously said, “If you have cornered a foe, give them a golden bridge to escape across, or they will fight like tigers.”

John Radcliffe went to Moscow either to offer Vladimir Putin a ride out of the country or to warn him not to do what they are considering doing. I even suspect I know which country Russia has in mind. For some subliminal reason, ever since the time of the Russian Revolution. The Russians have always had a serious hard-on against the United Kingdom. I’ve asked my UK friends and colleagues why? But I haven’t received a suitable answer. Patriot missiles are one thing, but Storm Shadow missiles are something else entirely.

Maybe you could quit your job, or take drugs or drink heavily. Spend your retirement money on a new Ferrari or a boat. Go see your kids. Enjoy life while you still can. Maybe you could build a bunker in the basement and stock it with groceries and fresh water. What? Did you really expect them to tell you the truth? And upset the stock market? No way!

But they sent Radcliffe because he’s not a diplomat. This is far too serious for the clown college of JD Vance or little Marco Rubio. It’s questionable, if they even told Mr. Trump the truth of what was cooking. Don’t get him involved in this, if at all possible! This is way too serious for the Moron Brigade. Too serious for the frozen Republican rump Duma in Congress. Do you begin to see now? The quiet whisper in private to responsible parties. “Hey, just between you and me, I need to tell you something.”

James Carville raged at Jefferies for involving himself with this band of thieves and cutthroats. I agreed with Carville that the optics looked terrible. But then I thought; Jeffries is a party politician, but he’s no idiot. If he thought it important enough to meet with Jared Kushner, maybe something is up that they don’t want to or can’t discuss publicly. Russia is headed for a brick wall at a hundred miles an hour and might be willing to pull the chicken switch.

Will they go down with a bang or a whimper? It has long been alleged that the CIA actually runs US foreign policy. Radcliffe’s mission solves that mystery. The message and the mission were far too important for the likes of Trump, Vance, Hegseth or little Marco. “You guys shut the fuck up and don’t breathe a word of this to anyone, or you could get millions of people killed.”

If Russia uses battlefield nukes on Ukraine, Pandora’s box is open. If Russia attacks NATO with nukes, it’s a full scale thermonuclear war. It could be that Russia is only posturing as they have been known to do in the past. But the situation inside Russia is becoming so dire, that we can no longer take that to the bank. I’d like to think there is another reason for the visit, but the symbolism says otherwise. This was a deadly serious meeting, the likes of which the world has never seen before. Like something out of a political thriller or an apocalyptic, science fiction movie.

You had to know, or at least suspect, maybe even just a little bit. That electing Donald Trump could put us in a situation like this, eventually.

“We knew the world would not be the same. A few people laughed, a few people cried. Most people were silent. I remembered the line from the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita; Vishnu is trying to persuade the Prince that he should do his duty, and to impress him, takes on his multi-armed form and says, ‘Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds.’ I suppose we all thought that, one way or another.” ― J. Robert Oppenheimer

By David Glenn Cox

There are probably a million stories in the Trump regime. Unfortunately, most of them are probably untrue. And if they are true the regime will deny them with all the strength their black hearts can supply. The truth simply isn’t in them, and even if they don’t have to lie, they will anyway. The other day snotty sweet Scotty Bessent told a reporter that we don’t need so many jobs anymore, because Mr. Trump was deporting so many of the illegals. That’s like saying don’t worry about the hole in the boat because the water in the lake isn’t very deep.

Another Trump policy genius was asked, “Why isn’t the economy performing as they had predicted?” Hold on to your hat! The reason was because under Mr. Trump, new factory construction in America was way, way up. Nope! New factory construction was down by 22%. They had predicted 4% growth and only achieved 1 ½% growth. But when those new factories come online, 4% easy peasy. Just you wait, der Fuhrer is building secret wonder weapons, which will surely help turn the tide!

I don’t know if you’ve ever witnessed a SpaceX rocket launch before. All the employees are assembled together in a big room to watch the launch. And those employees who wish to keep their jobs, will clap and cheer wildly and enthusiastically, even if the launch is a failure and the rocket blows up. [APPLAUSE!] Sure, half of the engines cut out early, and the rocket tumbled helplessly out of control and had to be destroyed. But otherwise, wasn’t that great?

There is no such thing as a failure. Success and failure are just two loosely defined points of view. If we say it was a success, it was! Even if the rocket flew out of control and had to be destroyed. A project which can’t admit its own failures will never achieve any success. The objective is strictly to cover your ass and have a scapegoat handy at all times. See: Deflecting Pool. Do you know whose fault this was? VANDALS! Arrest them Gin-nine! Arrest somebody! Make an example out of them! Throw the book at them! It couldn’t be my fault! It couldn’t be my crooked golf buddy’s fault! It must have been those vandals!

Recently, Mr. Trump was asked about his Canadian trade negotiations. He responded excitedly, spouting, “The Canadians are the worst!” Mr. Fart of the deal couldn’t close a trade deal. He couldn’t bend the Canadians over to his will with his spry and wily negotiating skills. Ergo, the failure wasn’t his fault! It was those awful, awful Canadians! “They’re the worst!” As most of us are already aware, we’ve never had any trouble reaching a trade deal with Canada before? Every other administration has achieved a Canadian trade deal, except for this one. It must be Canada’s fault! “My fault? Get this filthy communist out of the room!”

And if someone else did successfully achieve a trade deal with Canada, it was always a bad deal. Only Mr. Trump could achieve a good deal. And if he doesn’t, well, you know who to blame.

“The most effective way to destroy people is to deny and obliterate their own understanding of their history.” ― George Orwell

Take control of the narrative, throttle it, and never let it go! During the epic battle of Stalingrad, early German successes were reported in the media as crushing the Red Barbarians. But as the battle turned against the Germans, the media reported they were taking a bloody toll on the Red Heathens, until finally it became “The German army is making the Red Savages pay for every step they take forward!” We’re winning! Even if we’re not! Sound familiar? We’re winning in Iran, says Mr. Trump. Cankles McBrainfreeze said yesterday that the navy had completed sweeping the Strait of Hormuz of mines.

Were there any mines in the Strait of Hormuz to begin with? Hundreds and hundreds of ships in gulf waters, and I haven’t heard of a single one striking a mine. “Mission accomplished! Good work, men!” Thanks to our intense efforts, all of the polar bears plaguing Miami Beach have finally been cleared out of Floriduh. Success! If at first you don’t succeed, make something up! If you don’t like the headlines in the news, then just fire somebody. That’ll fix it. If sailors complain of poor conditions on the Abraham Lincoln…shut those people up! Notice how the sailors and their families didn’t want their names or faces used out of a fear of retaliation. Retaliation? What retaliation? That would be illegal!

That’s the way it works, the squeaky wheel gets fired. Hacksaw Pete Hegseth fired the top general in the army. He wasn’t down with Pete’s new order. It’s been months now, and there is no replacement because all of the generals in the army aren’t down with Pete’s new order. If Pete can’t find generals to follow his instructions. Pete will do it all by himself. With his training as a squad leader and a drunken Fox News weekend host, Pete will do it all himself! Just like you know who, who also didn’t trust his generals. So he appointed himself Fuhrer and top general in the army.

Leaders who tend to fire everyone with the slightest hint of doubt are protecting their own insecurity. They fear the contrary opinion of someone who is truly qualified. They want to play John Wayne in “The Sands of Iwo Jima.” Experts make them nervous. Sit down, General! When I want your opinion, I’ll ask for it! “Were you ever a squad leader in Afghanistan, General? ,Then I guess you just don’t know then, do you? There’s lots of things majors can teach major generals in the army. So listen up!”

Stories of officers and specialists leaving Peckerhead Pete’s military on conscientious objector status. They don’t want to commit war crimes, or attack civilian targets. They don’t want to follow illegal orders, there must be something wrong with them? “Shoot the fishing boat! I said, shoot the fishing boat now or we’ll miss being on the six o’clock news!”

“It was miraculous. It was almost no trick at all, he saw, to turn vice into virtue and slander into truth, impotence into abstinence, arrogance into humility, plunder into philanthropy, thievery into honor, blasphemy into wisdom, brutality into patriotism, and sadism into justice. Anybody could do it; it required no brains at all. It merely required no character.”
― Joseph Heller, Catch-22

By David Glenn Cox

We stand on the threshold of a new world, built upon the glories of our past and the wreckage of our future. Former Republican nonsense-spreader Marjorie Tater Greene says Mr. Trump wants to use nuclear weapons in Iran. Fortunately, I don’t let what Maggie says keep me up nights. But it is something to consider when our president is a narcissistic, amoral ten-year-old with jock itch, hemorrhoids and a bad temper. We are forced by reality to consider the unthinkable.

CIA head John Radcliffe flies to Moscow for secret talks. Were this any other administration, that wouldn’t concern me much. But with this bunch of thugs, hooligans and gangsters, I half-way expect another Soviet- Nazi non-aggression pact. Rumors say Vladimir Putin would also like to use nuclear weapons in Ukraine. Just such talk is beyond the pale and a dangerous symptom of our distress.

The war against Iran was entirely unprovoked. The war against Venezuela was entirely unprovoked. A war of aggrandizement and conquest, and begun with a surprise attack, ala Pearl Harbor. Is that the new American way? The trade-war against Canada was also entirely unprovoked. A trade-war against one of our largest trading partners and former closest allies. Does that make any sense at all to you? Bringing chaos from stability and punishing our children to appease an old coot’s bad temper. Caligula lives!

A burgeoning, bellicose, bubble-headed Fascist state wrapped in red, white and blue, blue, blue. How will this ever end well? Chances are that it won’t. After just two years, it should be glaringly obvious to all how Mr. Trump bankrupted a casino. Child’s play! “Look, Ma! No hands!” How did Nazi Germany ever come into being? Look in the mirror. This mongoloid marauder and his class of Republican reactionary retread retards kicked 700,000 Americans off of Medicaid to give a $234 billion dollar tax break not to the 1%, but to the top 2/10s of the one percent.

Hitler once met with wary German industrialists and explained how once he was in power, they’d all get big fat defense contracts and all become richer than kings! Hitler bribed them. Never mind the fate of Germany or of Europe, when they could become rich! Does this begin to sound at all familiar? The rah- rah squad of the incontinent congress cheers as Mr. Trump pardons the very thugs who wanted to KILL THEM! Yeah! Mr. Trump!

One of these days, Alice. Pow! Right in the kisser! You’re going to the moon, Alice! One fine day these bottom feeders and scum suckers on Wall Street are going to wake up and discover their ride is gone. That lush American consumer economy of new cars, big houses, and fast-food joints, all gone. While they were busy betting on semiconductors and data centers they forgot three square meals and a cot. The old saying is ignored: “Dance with the girl who brung you.” That’s not sexy, and that’s not fun. Screw meat and potatoes; they want squab and caviar. Screw the domestic economy! Who cares about them?

Mr. Trump’s unprovoked trade war with Canada is destined for disaster. The products which Canada offers are in relatively short supply. Aluminum takes a great deal of electricity to make efficiently. If the Untied Snakes adds tariffs, Canada will simply sell the aluminum to Europe or Asia. It won’t sit in the warehouse gathering dust for long. American Agri-business is screaming from Michigan to Miami, warning of impending disaster. Humpty Dumpty is juggling their future with his eyes closed. Meanwhile, the over-priced American automotive industry will become even more overpriced.

The balloon can’t keep going up and up as jobs and the economy keep going down and down. Watch as history repeats itself! During the Republican Great Depression of 1929, banks speculated with depositors’ money. Because the deposits were uninsured, millions went broke overnight. They had believed the markets could just keep going up and up, like magic. Even as Mr. Ford closed his car factory and Mr. RCA almost went broke.

Today we have crypto currency, the greatest scam ever created since the invention of the wooden nickel. Faceless, unnamed leadership, completely unhindered by regulation or insurance. But a great way to hide money and launder cash. Plus, a great dodge on those pesky taxes. They only look at the plus side of the ledger and never consider the negative. What happens if they’re steaming along one night and hit an iceberg? Or a spark touches the Hindenburg balloon. Their money will be gone faster than you can say “Trump’s an idiot.” And the kicker is they won’t even know who stole all their money.

Mixed Martial Arts contests, auto races and military parades, helipads and deflecting pools! Ballrooms and pointless monuments to his madness. Nero rules! Anybody got a match? “Wars and rumors of wars. I should have swiped that Gideon’s bible from the Motel 6 when the prostitute wasn’t looking, when I had the chance. It’s a good thing I don’t believe, or I might not sleep too well at night. Da big book says the Antichrist will fool the faithful and they will never see him coming. Gosh, that’s truly amazing. The faithful will cheer for him and adore him! And he will be grievously wounded in the head and somehow miraculously survive. Scary stuff for believers, I suppose.

But the actual numbers speak louder than the Bible. Zero job growth, zero wage growth, rising inflation and the slowest sales at Walmart in six years. Walmart is the barometer for the American poor, and if Walmart ain’t making it. The poor ain’t making it either. It signals subliminally that the floor is crumbling beneath our feet. All of those would be millionaires and billionaires will be shocked soon asking, “Where did all my money go?’

“And I saw a beast rising out of the sea, (New York) with ten horns and seven heads, with ten diadems on its horns and blasphemous names on its heads. And the beast that I saw was like a leopard; (orange) its feet were like a bear’s, (cankles) and its mouth was like a lion’s mouth. (large) And to it the dragon gave his power and his throne and great authority. One of its heads seemed to have a mortal wound, but its mortal wound was healed, and the whole earth marveled as they followed the beast. And they worshiped the dragon, for he had given his authority to the beast, and they worshiped the beast, saying, “Who is like the beast, and who can fight against it?” And the beast was given a mouth uttering haughty and blasphemous words, (self-explanatory) and it was allowed to exercise authority for forty-two months. ...” Surprise!

Revelation 13;1-18

By David Glenn Cox

Before we go too far and get too serious here, this morsel was just too delicious to pass up. This kind of ignorance can’t be bottled or canned and must be served up fresh. Eric Trump, the lowly third spawn of Don old Trump says Darlene Graham, the sister of the late Lindsey Graham is “An unqualified idiot, who only got the job through nepotism.” Well, I guess it takes one to know one, doesn’t it? It’s a clear case of the pot calling the kettle a dumb ass. A man who works for his daddy and has never worked anywhere else even a single day in his life. A grown man, who lives in daddies apartment building rent-free wants to tell us all about nepotism. But I will accept Eric’s definition of an “unqualified idiot” based on his personal family experience alone.

Don old Trump is at war with Iran. Don old Trump started a war with Venezuela. Don old Trump is in a trade war with Canada. Don old Trump is in a war of words with Greenland. Don old Trump threatens Colombia, Panama and Mexico. Don old Trump threatens to leave NATO. Don old Trump threatens Spain. Don old threatens China. Don old Trump was at war with the chairman of the Federal Reserve. Don old Trump is suing the BBC. Don old Trump fired the editor of Stars and Stripes for telling the truth. I think I see a pattern forming here! God help Domino’s if his pizza is late.

The other day the media reported Don old was importing metric tons of Argentine ground beef to lower prices in the grocery store. You’d have to be as stupid as Eric Trump and Darlene Graham all rolled into one to believe that cockamamie story. But the media is too terrified of Don old to tell the truth about him. Don old through his pinhead proxy sweet Scotty Bessent, engaged in a 2.5 billion dollar currency swap to bolster the failing Argentine peso back in October. In order to salvage any small amount of that money now, it is vital to keep the Argentine peso afloat. On August 16^th the peso collapsed again. And within a week, Don old announces metric tons of Argentine beef imports, all tariff-free. Sure, sure, everyone knows how much Don old cares about the consumer.

But as expected, the farmers and ranchers from all parts of the red-state reactionary rodeo began quietly murmuring their discontent. On local network TV affiliates (because the national news are chicken shit cowards.) Cattlemen’s Association presidents began hitting the airwaves in the land of falling IQ scores. It is easy, given what we know, that if the cattlemen ’are expressing their displeasure politely on the TV, they are also lighting up the congressional phone lines with less than polite commentary. They are hopping mad! “Houston, we have finally reached find out!” That’s one small step for Trump and one giant leap towards bankruptcy.

The reddest of the red. Goons and good old boys, the very blood and marrow of Maga support, suddenly stunned, asking, “How could Don old do this to us! We’re special! How dare Don old treat us like this!” Far too monosyllabic to understand that it has nothing to do with them. Don old’s deal went bad. If the deal had been with Japan, we’d be swimming in tariff-free Toyotas and cheap big-screen TVs right now. If it had been Brazil, it would have been Brazil nuts. Don old does what suits Don old best. Nothing personal, sorry about ruining your business, but…get stuffed! One of us is getting fucked here, guess who?

Many of us are already aware of Don old’s bad temper. He doesn’t take public criticism well or lightly, even if he did ruin their businesses. Do you know what Don old did in response to the cattleman’s laments? He reopened the importation of cattle from Mexico. “Do you boys want to go on TV and run your mouth some more? Do you want to complain some more?” In answer to the cattlemen’s complaints, Don old doubles down on beef importation. Because? Don old just loves the consumer.

But this is something new. The Rubicon has just been crossed. Suddenly, Don old is attacking and punishing the Maga multitude for the sin of complaining. It’s a sign of late-stage authoritarianism. They always eat their young… eventually. Donner; party of one? We saw just a hint of that already. Pam Blondie blamed Krash Patel for the Epstein debacle. Gin-nine Pirro blamed Duh Doug Burnham for the deflecting pool mess. It’s always somebody else’s fault, isn’t it? Damn you, Joe Biden!

History tells us that whenever authoritarian leadership is questioned, the knives come out. Whenever the authoritarian leader is overwhelmed, they tend to shut down. Making petty proclamations and symbolic gestures. Big Brother is going to increase the chocolate ration, you know, because he really loves consumers. We’re not at war with Eurasia! We’ve never been at war with Eurasia! Fake News Winston! Down the memory hole. The captain of the USS Abraham Lincoln will be terminated as soon as they tie off to the pier in San Diego. He let the crew complain about the poor conditions. The unpardonable sin. Never mind the horrible conditions! Shut those people up!

But in the cat’s cradle, it is becoming apparent that the Trump regime is beginning to crack under the strain. Sometimes, the authoritarian leader is unable to handle or control the affairs of state and will fixate on minor details. Never mind the war in Iran. Never mind the trade war with Canada. “We’re going to fixate on beef prices! And anyone who complains… is going to get it, right between the eyes!

This also goes hand in hand with Don old’s new girlfriend Eva, I mean Natalie. Swamped and overwhelmed, the leader grasps for a mother figure to hear his private confessions and his laments. Someone to rub his back and say they understand. Someone who won’t argue with him like a wife might. Someone who will wipe his furrowed brow and tell him he’s always right. She understands him. Mommy loves you, Don old. Mommy is here for you, Don old. Mommy will never complain.

“At headquarters, where everyone lived under the tremendous pressure of responsibility, probably nothing was more welcome than a dictate from above. That meant being freed of a decision and simultaneously being provided with an excuse for failure.”
― Albert Speer,

By David Glenn Cox

It is very insightful, especially for the slow learners and evangelical types among us. Don old Trump is having an adulterous affair with an office staffer. Unprofessional, immoral, and uniquely cruel. He does this openly and in front of his staff, and in front of the world press. Who do you have to suck off around here to get a promotion?

Don old has a wife and children. I’ll be the first to admit that I think Malaria Trump is an abomination as a first lady. The term itself is almost a joke. A woman picked directly out of Jeffrey Epstein’s garden. A former porn actress in the fictional role of the first lady. Only in America, kids, can a vapid bubblehead rise to the level of First Lady. Climbing the ladder of suck cess, wrong by wrong. That being said, even an aging, dirty old prostitute deserves some dignity. Even her anchor baby son deserves some dignity. Daddies got a new girlfriend son. Mama’s out! Deal with it!

But why does Don old act so brazenly? Doesn’t he know that having a public affair could hurt his popularity? He does know; but he doesn’t give a shit. Your opinion of him matters not a whit. He’s king and in his megalomania beyond all criticism. He’s the king, and he can do whatever he wants without any limits or restraints being placed upon him.

When they finally get around to hanging the extreme court. I hope they hang John Roberts last. He’s played a dirty, dirty legal trick on the American public, and an absolute abortion of justice. John Roberts ruled Don old Trump could continue building his grand Fuhrer bunker, for now! Oh, that phrase “for now!”

Years ago, a local property developer bought an outparcel on the edge of an established neighborhood. Their plan was to shoehorn in a shopping center. The shopping center would have two entrances and exits both dumping traffic incongruously out into busy intersections. The neighborhood sued and won! The developer appealed, and the court said they could continue construction for now, until a final decision was reached. But in actual fact, the court was giving its unbridled approval, while not publicly saying so.

The developer immediately doubled the number of workers on the site, rushing to complete the project. Once the shopping center was complete, the developer had the exact same property rights as the neighborhood. John Roberts just did the same thing to the American public without having the testicles to say so. The old bait and switch! Let the court consider this matter for a few months, but in the meantime, you may continue building. My own sister was an attorney, but I never thought less of her for it.

Once built this monstrosity will never be unbuilt. Clearly, Don old did not seek proper authorization and violated statutes and covenants, but let the court consider the matter for a few more months. A crime against the American people. Where there is no justice there is no law, only the illusion of laws. The only difference between John Roberts and Natalie Harp is a black robe or a black negligee.

I’ve asked this question before. Why do they do it? Why do they attach themselves like Magas (Pun Intended) onto the rotting corpse of Don old Trump? No one escapes! No one! Everyone who aligns themselves with Don old ends up like Malaria Trump. Talk about playing with fire. That’s playing with fire while wearing a gasoline suit. Sooner or later, you’re out! Maybe you did something wrong, or maybe not. Either way you’re out. End of story. Brown-nosing and backbiting are the new current currency of the realm. The contractor/ golf buddy Don old hired screwed up the deflecting pool job.

Do you know who was eventually held responsible? The Interior Secretary, Doug, Duh-Burnham. “Damn, Doug, you really let us down on this one! We were expecting so much more from you.”

The king ignores his wife, Catherine of Aragon, and woos Anne Boleyn, and then Jane Seymour.

And to all of Don old’s simple-minded supporters and evangelicals who thought for a moment that Jesus had sent Don old. You’re close, biblically speaking. You’re suckers! Read your damn bibles; Satan is the great deceiver! Score: Satan one, Simpletons zero. Yes, he walks with Jesus and sleeps with any woman who will have him. From 13 to 60, blind, crippled or crazy. The pedophile, rapist president that Jesus sent! Jeffrey Epstein’s best pal. Suffers a head wound and survives! Read your fucking bibles!

Now you’ve got this pedophile ringleader who dies mysteriously in prison. A man with lots of valuable information about lots of rich and powerful men, including Don old. We know for a fact that it sure was convenient that Jeffrey committed suicide. It solved a lot of problems for Don old. A man who routinely lies, cheats, and steals. A man without any moral scruples of any kind. A man who would cheat on his wife on the six o’clock news. A man who would publicly shame his wife and son, without even the common decency of a tomcat.

But there’s no fool like an old fool. Remember what preacher Jimmy from Plains said. Having lust in your heart is the same as committing adultery. An 80 year-old-man who thinks a 35-year-old-woman is in love with him. She finds his orange face makeup and stick-on muskrat hat sexy. Nothing like an old man with a 55-inch waist and body odor that women don’t find attractive. Sexy, sexy bruised hands and diminishing cerebral powers. A completely amoral President and his Harpie who publicly peruses a married man in the office. Her boss in the office.

Natalie is as obvious as Don old is stupid. And soon, it will all end and Natalie, like Queen Camilla, will be unceremoniously booted out of the palace. Completely unemployable outside of Domino’s Pizza or Walmart. Speaking of Walmart, they just suffered through their worst sales quarter in six years. Gosh, the economy is doing great! Never mind the gas prices; watch the diesel prices. Approaching six dollars a gallon here in AZ. Now, I don’t drive a diesel vehicle, but every truck driver in America does. Is the president defect watching inflation or his infatuation? There’s no fool like an old fool! Who knows, maybe Natalie will get lucky like Katherine Parr, and outlive the bastard and become the dowager whore.

“We were convinced that she looked on with indifference if she noticed us at all. Today I know that everything watches, that nothing goes unseen, and that even wallpaper has a better memory than ours. It isn’t God in His heaven that sees all. A kitchen chair, a coat hanger, a half-filled ash tray, or the wooden replica of a woman named Niobe can perfectly well serve as an unforgetting witness to every one of our acts.” ― Günter Grass,

By David Glenn Cox

Darlene Graham, the sister of the late Senator Lindsey Graham and Republican cardboard cutout senate candidate from South (Trumplandia) Carolina. Suffered the largest political gaffe since succession. She did the unthinkable and told the truth. I’m sure on the surface to Mr. and Ms. America the gaffe isn’t nearly as large or as serious as the politicos and hired geeks want to make it out to be. But this is the party of Donald Trump, and truth-telling has been specifically outlawed.

Ms. Graham was asked, should US combat troops be used in the event China ever invaded Taiwan? She inadvertently said that she didn’t know. She didn’t know much about foreign policy, but supported the military. Only two weeks ago, she was just Lindsey’s sister, and now they expect her to know about Taiwan? Personally, I found it refreshing. I’d never heard a Republican tell the truth before. Sure, it was outrageous, but it could even catch on.

An hour or two of heavy reading and personal study might possibly bring Ms. Graham up to speed. It’s not rocket science. She’s only a placeholder after all, and it’s not like she really needs to know anything. She’ll take her marching orders from you know who! What does South Carolina need with Senators for, anyway? When they can just let Trump decide.

Spawn Hannity of OX News tells Ms. Graham, Relax! Most Americans are just as dumb as you, maybe even dumber! Most Americans don’t know where Taiwan is either! (But they aren’t Senate candidates, are they?) They’re allowed to be dumb. You know; if you watch a news program where the host routinely calls his audience stupid, he’s probably right!

The president defect announces he’s lifting tariffs on 300,000 metric tons of ground beef to help the poor struggling American consumer, right? Not even close! Trump is importing Argentine beef to prop up Argentina’s failing currency. Consumers? You’ve got to be kidding me. It was just last year in October, when the Treasury moved $2.5 billion dollars to prop up the Argentine peso. Two weeks ago, the peso collapsed again, and it’s Donald Trump to the rescue. Make Argentina Great Again! Ms. Graham doesn’t know much about ground beef issues either, but she supports backyard cookouts!

Yesterday, I watched Mr. Trump take softball questions outside the White Palace with his new floozie on his arm. Can you believe it? Absolutely no shame about it whatsoever. A changing of the guard! Out with the old and in with the younger woman. Dear Malaria: effective immediately your services will no longer be necessary. Empty your employee locker and turn in all company property by five o’clock. Maybe Jeff Bezos can start a new documentary. “The President’s Other Woman” Ninety minutes of pure hokum and bullshit with a big fat check attached at the end.

They should give Darlene a chance. Let her swim in the snake pit awhile, and I wager she’ll be sniping and condescending at the press with the best of them. Never mind Taiwan, wherever it is, and let’s get down to brass tacks and sealing wax. Last month, the Republican Senate was outraged when Dr. Fauci stood on his Fifth Amendment constitutional right and refused to answer their Republican gotcha questions.

“Oh, he did, did he? We’ll just see about that!” They threatened to charge Dr. Fauci with contempt of Congress for standing on his constitutional rights. Where does Darlene stand on this important issue? Dr. Fauci faces no charges yet, despite the case already having been tried on OX News. Maybe they are just waiting for Darlene to arrive?

The President defect is now going to bring Iran down with sanctions. Excuse me, but wasn’t that what we were doing BEFORE Mr. Trump started a pointless war and spent thirty billion dollars? Yeah, that’ll work! He’s got them right where he wants them now!

Yesterday, Mr. Trump ignited a for-real trade war with one of our largest trading partners and closest allies. What could go wrong? Fifty percent tariffs. Teach them a lesson! Run up the cost of a new car by a few more thousands of dollars. Never mind that Canada is the largest export market for American cars. Teach em a lesson!

The Canadian Prime Minister called it a “power play.” We’re going to make you an offer you can’t refuse. Mr. Carney calling it an issue of national sovereignty. If the US passed sanctions on country X, Canada would immediately follow suit and do as they were told. But Carney did the unthinkable and told Mr. Trump to fuck off, and for the French-speaking audience in Quebec, Va te faire foutre! Mr. Trump’s trade war has hurt the American wine and liquor industry more than anyone since Carrie Nation. Markets lost are rarely ever found.

And now for the Lightning Round.

True or false? New car sales are being depressed because of consumers with poor credit scores? TRUE!

True or false? Automotive repossessions are at an all-time high? TRUE!

True or false? Home prices have peaked and are starting to fall precipitously in some areas? TRUE!

True or false? Home foreclosures are rising to their highest level since 2014? TRUE!

True or false? Most of the foreclosures are found in red states? TRUE! Floriduh, South (Trumplandia) Carolina and Texas.

True or false? This all Trump’s fault? TRUE!

And you ain’t seen nothing yet! Come five o’clock today, the futures markets will open and Wall Street will tell us exactly what they think about Mr. Trump’s pointless trade war.

And now for comic relief. Reich’s Fuhrer Stephen Miller defends Natalie Harp in much the same way Joseph Goebbels would defend Eva Braun. Calling attacks upon her as “odious.” Not untrue, but “odious.” So what! The President’s having an adulterous affair right under the nose of the American people. Yeah? So what! And what are they going to do about it?

“No sympathy for the devil; keep that in mind. Buy the ticket, take the ride...and if it occasionally gets a little heavier than what you had in mind, well...maybe chalk it up to forced consciousness expansion: Tune in, freak out, get beaten.” ― Hunter S. Thompson,

By David Glenn Cox

There are two kinds of women who love eighty-year-old men: schemers and granddaughters. Two kinds of women who write their boss extensive flowing love notes, schemers and brown nosers. Two kinds of men who would tolerate such obvious, overt, and over the top flattery. Dimwits and Donald Trump. Flattery will get you anywhere. “I always want things to be right between us.” It is as pathetic as it is sickening.

A Harpie sharpie, the poor thing just can’t stand to be away from him. He’s just so attractive, articulate, dynamic and rotund. Blowing more smoke up the old man’s ass than a Canadian forest fire. What must it be like for the other offal office workers, not named Natalie? Actually, it’s obvious; they have so much in common. She has Lie right in her name. Can you imagine how popular Natalie is around the White House water cooler?

Sleeping in the ladies’ dressing room at Trump’s Bedminster golf course. Going without food and sleep to be available at his beck and call at all hours, day or night. If you’re gonna go for it, go all the way. That’s perfectly normal behavior, don’t you think? And Mr. Trump the narcissist that he is; just lets her. Oh, I love you! I’ll do anything for you! Look! I’ll even eat dirt for you! Look! I’m eating dirt!

Just the other day, Mr. Trump’s press secretary quit because Trump was infatuated with her and would not leave her alone, even on her maternity leave. One woman fawns while another struggles to escape his grasp. Talk about your high-class white-trash soap operas. Oh, if only those walls could talk. I keep coming back to Trump’s cabinet secretaries making presentations as Mr. Trump asks, “Natalie? What do you think? Should we allow 300,000 pounds of tariff free, foreign ground beef into the country?” I almost fell out of my chair when I heard that, and math isn’t even my strong suit. 330 million Americans divided by 300,000 pounds of ground beef! Around one hamburger patty for each and every American. But it’s going to help consumers lower beef prices in the same way pissing off a bridge helps end the water shortage.

Beef producers (all Trumpers, through and through) hate the idea. Remember? Tariffs were supposed to encourage domestic production. Make Argentina Great Again! Who remembers the $2.5 billion Argentine currency swap less than a year ago? Well, I’m sure the Argentine peso’s collapse on August 16^th had nothing to do with Mr. Trump’s new ground beef arrangement. Nothing at all! Well, Natalie thought it was a good idea.

Mr. Trump now threatens Iran with the D-Day of economic sanctions. Ask yourself, after forty-seven years of economic sanctions on Iran, what exactly is left to sanction? It is as ridiculous as threatening to sanction the sun. The only things we get from Iran are oil and pistachios. The only thing they buy from us is nothing. And we’re going to double those sanctions! Two times zero is still zero. Boy, we’re going to teach them a harsh lesson, aren’t we, Natalie? Hush, Pete; Natalie has the floor. We’ll hear from the Pentagon after Natalie is finished speaking!

Treasury Suckretary Scotty Totty Bessent discounts the loss of 100,000 jobs. You see; because Mr. Trump has deported all the illegals, we don’t need as many jobs. God, that’s stupid! Did Natalie think that up for you? Who needs jobs? In the fourth quarter of last year, Scotty predicted the economy was going to bloom in the first quarter like all get out. In the first quarter of this year, Scotty promised, just wait, the economy will bloom in the second quarter. And in the second quarter, Scotty says, who needs jobs anyway?

“I also know I’ve been distracted all week (forgetting to eat throughout the days, and even forgetting to sleep, and only catching a couple hours at a time.)” Okay, I’ll buy, she lost her appetite. But sleep? You don’t forget to sleep. You might not sleep and lie in your bed wide awake, but it’s not because she forgot. Oh, I forgot to open my eyes this morning when I woke up. I forgot to get dressed and went to work in my pajamas. I forgot! Okay? I just forgot; it happens!

As pathetic as the situation has become, it’s also understandable. An old, old man flattered by a pretty girl. Rekindling the romantic flames from out of the ashes of his dotage. Wife? What wife? Oh, her. She’s like the cleaning lady; I call her in when we need her help around the house and slip her a few bucks when she’s finished. We have an open marriage. I do whatever the fuck I want to do. And as long as the money flows, she’s good with it. Cares? What makes you think she cares? She lives in New York; she won’t bother us.

Reports say that Peckerhead Pete Hegseth wants to be president. He’ll be lucky if he can get his old job back at Ox News. But first, he’s going to have to fight shady JD for the opportunity. The dynamic duo of “Drunk and Disorderly.” The invisible man in the administration, Marco Polio, might also choose to run. But since he’s nearly invisible, who would ever know? Don’t look now, Chicken Little, but the sky is falling! The bullshit bonanza is coming to an end!

How low would you have to sink to become Michael Cohen and crawl back to Mr. Trump, hat in hand and groveling on his knees seeking forgiveness? There are other less embarrassing professions. He could sell drugs or become a male prostitute or run for Senate as a Republican, but groveling to Donald Trump. Shame! Shame on him

Mr. Trump is down to his last without a friend left in the world. Just him and his girlfriend, Natalie down in the bunker as history quietly repeats itself.

“Republicans approve of the American farmer, but they are willing to help him go broke. They stand four-square for the American home--but not for housing. They are strong for labor--but they are stronger for restricting labor’s rights. They favor minimum wage--the smaller the minimum wage the better. They endorse educational opportunity for all--but they won’t spend money for teachers or for schools. They think modern medical care and hospitals are fine--for people who can afford them. They consider electrical power a great blessing--but only when the private power companies get their rake-off. They think American standard of living is a fine thing--so long as it doesn’t spread to all the people. And they admire of Government of the United States so much that they would like to buy it.”
― Harry S. Truman

By David Glenn Cox

Isn’t it amazing? Say what you want about the Trump regime, screwballs, drunks and incompetents, but the press office is on the ball. Just twenty-four hours after the story breaks about the president defect’s new girlfriend, and guess who appears in the White Palace like magic? I guess it’s just one of those things; if you say her name three times in front of a mirror, she appears. “Malaria, Malaria, Malaria!” But be prepared, because if you summon her, she’s gonna want a check. She bills by the hour, you know; old habits die hard.

Malaria Trump walked down the hall and got her picture taken by the hired geeks and poof! She’s gone again. Gone back to her apartment in New York, I guess. Perhaps they were afraid a fight would break out over who loved Donald more. “You love him more!” No, you love him more! Poor Natalie is infatuated (with power) There she is, a virtual nobody whispering into the king’s ear. Blowing her horn or something. Unlike Peckerhead Pete Hegseth, Natalie is only drunk with power.

Friendly advice: if you’re ever firing people politically at the behest of the president. Never, ever, ever tell them, “I’m firing you for political reasons on direct orders of the president himself. And I know that you could probably sue me, but orders are orders!” Henceforth this shall be known as the Patel’s an idiot rule.

Do you remember that episode of the Twilight Zone with William Shatner? “Terror at 20,000 feet” The one where the monster is messing with the airplane’s engine in flight? That episode was replayed on Wall Street yesterday. Imagine Wall Street was the airplane and Scotty Totty Bessent was the monster. Bill Shatner’s part was played by the Wall Street brokers themselves. Scotty opens the engine cowling and begins to tinker around in the bond market. Imagine they are telling you everything is fine. But from the next room, you hear yelling, a scuffle, and glass breaking. Everything is fine! Nothing to see here, move along! If everything were fine, Scotty wouldn’t be climbing out on the wing of the plane in the first place.

It’s not so much what Scotty was doing as much as, that Scotty was doing. You’re not supposed to open the engine cowling and tinker with the engine (bond market) in flight. And telling everyone nothing is wrong while you do it. Is a good way to spook the herd. How spooked were they? Uninsured crypto currencies soared while guaranteed government-backed bonds fell. The traders would rather take their chances on unknown crypto leadership than to trust Scotty.

Up today, down tomorrow! Look at what the Dow Jones average did right before the crash of 1929. The market fell and then recovered, fell and then recovered. Then fell again, and before you knew it, it was 1950! An incredible national debt of forty trillion dollars, not including the two trillion dollars the congress borrowed (Siphoned off) from the Social Security trust fund to finance bubble head Bush’s Iraq war. Don’t forget that! Remember that the next time you hear some Republican tell you about Social Security going broke. Who do they think we are, Jackie Coogan?

But folks, there’s funny ha, ha, and then there is funny, you’ve got to be kidding me, bro! A secret memo has leaked to the press. Republicans fear their future in the midterms is tied to the issue of AI data centers! Man, oh man, do they have their finger on the pulse of America, or what? Yeah! That’s it! Data centers. Naïve me would have suspected something like inflation, high gas prices, or a hugely unpopular war, or a revulsion of Donald Trump in general. Nope! Data centers.

AI data centers are an issue, but it’s all really a question of Republican philosophy. Republicans believe that you should let the free market work, unencumbered by government interference. Unless of course, the citizenry don’t like the idea much and resists, in which case you just cram it down their throats and tell the peons, I mean the citizens, it’s for their own good. We know what’s good for you! So shut up and quit your bitching.

The Republican governor of Ohio chastises the peons. Don’t you idiots know that AI data centers are the future? We have AI data centers we use right now, that we use every day, stupid! We also have toxic waste dumps we use every day. Should we build thousands more? So maybe a compromise could be reached and some rules and regulations established to allay the fears of the populace. Nope! Just call them stupid and cram it down their throats. Call them Communists, ax murderers! Book readers even. And if they don’t like it… that’s too bad! Data centers, yeah, that’s the problem!

It’s like the captain of the Titanic shouting, “Quick! Rearrange the deck chairs!” I’ve given you funny peculiar, now I’m going to give you funny, ha, ha! It was just the other day when Donald Trump said, “I’m gonna call my buddy North Korean dictator Kim Jong Un. I’ll go visit him! We’re pals! We’re like blood brothers even, through and through.” There was no immediate response to Mr. Trump’s overture. Then yesterday, North Korea fired ten missiles towards Japan which landed in the ocean.

Now, I don’t claim to be a professional translator, but I’ll do my best. My Korean is only so, so. Loosely translated the message reads “FUCK OFF!” Or more precisely with the North Korean accent, FUCK OFF FAT BOY! “I fart in your general direction! Now go away before I’m forced to taunt you again! Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries.” There was a time when Kim was proud to meet with Mr. Trump. It made the little pip-squeak look important on the world stage. The President of the Untied Snakes comes to my house to bow and scrape for the cameras.

Today, Kim shows his people just how really important he has become! By officially telling the president of the United States to fuck off! Plans for the visit remain in limbo. Limbo being the correct word all right. The single greatest pariah on the planet Earth doesn’t want Mr. Trump hanging around anymore. How low can you go?

“Time wounds all heels.”
― Groucho Marx

By David Glenn Cox

“One has to bear in mind that one of the tactics of revolution is to destroy one’s predecessors in authority at any cost or hazard.”
― Herbert Hoover

The Trump regime is following some well-worn paths. The regime starts a war of conquest with Iran with a battle plan of just shoot everything. As fuel prices begin to spike the regime opens the tap on the strategic petroleum reserve. Desperate to hide the damage done to the American people. The arsenal is soon depleted and the oil reserve has run dry.

Now, as Wall Street gets its wake-up call. The Treasury Suckretary, Scotty Bessent, begins quantitative easing. A program instituted after the 2008 financial collapse. In other words, they’re applying the medicine before the sickness hits. To keep the Wall Street party going for just one more day. And when the crisis comes? There’s no medicine left and the cupboard was bare, so the poor dog got none. Shoot first and aim later. Cutting down the fruit orchard just to gather up firewood.

There’s a hole in Wall Street’s arm where all the money goes. The future is in AI data centers, like it or not, and for most part, the answer is not. It reminds me of WOW potato chips. The Republican Congress in 1998, after a long and contentious battle, allowed potato chips made with the chemical olestra onto the market. Ain’t it great? Potato chips that won’t make you fat! Ain’t it great? Only one little slight drawback: the chips could cause violent diarrhea. But hey, you don’t want to get fat, do you? After years of lobbying and tens of millions of dollars spent on Capitol Hill, the customers didn’t like the bargain.

Already, videos on YouTube advertise “No AI.” It’s called AI slop, and the public doesn’t like it. And AI is so good and so competent that AI has even reached “This Carbon-Based Life.” The AI gods posted an AI bio of me as someone who writes cultural and political essays and sings gospel tunes. AI confused me, Trump critic, with another David Cox gospel singer and blended us together. The future appears to be a dangerous place. As Beethoven was a St. Bernard dog from the 1992 hit movie.

But the data centers that the Gold Rush crew wants to build are equally unpopular with the public. Mr. Trump throws down the gauntlet. Anyone who wants AI data center in their backyards running up their electric bills and sucking up their water, are fine God-fearing, honest Americans. Anyone who doesn’t are filthy communists out to destroy this country and our way of life! All to keep the party going until the end. The Titanic house band is playing “Nearer My God to Thee” on the foredeck. Don’t worry, they’ll learn to love AI, eventually! Especially after we cram it down their throats.

Times are so good that I got an unsolicited letter from my credit card company yesterday, offering to finance a new car for me up to $50,000. What a deal! And at a friendly 18% kin-folk interest rate too. Back in the old days, you had to ask a bank for money. That’s service with a smile! The snare now chases the prey. Anyone who would lend $50,000 to a senior living on Social Security is out of their fucking mind or desperate. I vote desperate. New cars aren’t selling, and new home sales fell in July. No problem; it was only the height of the home-buying season. That number should be going the other way, but it isn’t.

That Donald Trump is out of his mind thing has finally reached consumer’s pocket books. Yesterday, I saw a can of mixed nuts at Kroger for $17.95. Now that’s really nuts! A bag of Fritos for $6.50. Not a big bag, mind you, just a regular bag of Fritos. Yeah sure, I should buy a house and a new car when I literally can’t afford a can of mixed nuts. Quantitative easing, keeping the easy credit coming, pulled directly out of thin air. Were I stupid enough to sign on the dotted line for a new car. The bank would borrow the money from the FED at 5% and finance me at 18%. Understand?

As long as the easy credit money keeps flowing, everyone is happy. Open 24 hours! Borrow any amount! Even paupers can drive new cars! Say, do you need ten billion dollars for an AI data center? Why didn’t you say so! Step to the front of the line! Just a few questions first. You want to finance ten billion dollars for fifteen years on a groovy data center? How long will it take to build? You’re not exactly sure. How long can you expect this data center to be cutting-edge and state-of-the art? Oh, five years, huh! Then you’ll have to tear this one down and build a new one, I see. Well, I don’t see any problems with your loan then.

Now, it was at this point in 1929, when Joseph P. Kennedy sold all of his stocks and got out of the stock market entirely. Later, they called him a financial wizard and a genius. Gosh, how did he know? Do you think he was a genius, or was everyone else just drinking the Kool aid? Burning through all the firewood before winter hits.

In the words of Bob Dylan, “A Hard Rain’s Gonna Fall.” Sooner or later, if they dance to the music, the pipers must be paid. Their goal is to out earn, by out running their debt. To keep the illusion of “good times” going, so they keep on loving Mr. Trump. Mr. Trump often brags about how the economy has never been better! That’s nuts! That’s $17.95 mixed nuts!

The president defect’s new girlfriend makes headlines. The president’s wife has disappeared from the White Palace. There was a time in this country, trust me, there was. When a President openly having an extramarital adulterous affair could have detrimental effect on their presidency. (See: Bill Clinton). But that was then, before the media became a purchasable commodity. Of all of America’s common fantasies, the greatest is their belief in a free media. I watched an OX news clip, (We’re smart, so you don’t have to be!) Their guest was reading their honest, unrehearsed, unbiased opinion directly from a teleprompter. I could see it reflected in her eyeglasses and in her drywall delivery. Reading from a script and calling it news. Way, way different from the way they cover the news in North Korea.

“I was lying in a burned out basement

With the full moon in my eyes

I was hopin for a replacement

When the sun burst through the sky

There was a band playing in my head

And I felt like getting high

I was thinking about what a friend had said

I was hopin it was a lie

I was thinking about what a friend had said

I was hopin it was a lie” - Neil Young

By David Glenn Cox

The women’s auxiliary Republican Party, aka “WARP,” has let rumors slip that the man who once said, “When you’re rich, they just let you do it!” Now, maintain that Donald Trump is hard to work for. No shit? Really? I wonder what clued them in? Maybe they’d never seen “Do you own a bikini?” on a job application before. “If the answer is yes, do you have any recent photos?”

Don and Natalie sitting in a tree K-I-S-S-I-N-G. First comes lust, then comes disparage. Then comes the new girl to replace what’s her name. Yes, the rumor mill is all abuzz saying Donnie has a new main squeeze in Natalie Harp. Now the question is, which came first? Did Donnie take a new girlfriend because Malaria Trump left him? Or did Malaria Trump leave him because Donnie took a new girlfriend? Oh, don’t worry, NASA couldn’t launch that rocket with a handful of Viagra and a bicycle pump.

Hard to work for! They say, demanding, they say! Sexist, with impossible beauty standards! Maybe you just can’t see it when you’re that close to it. Maybe, their two years at Bisbee Business College has blinded them with ambition? No one escapes; no one comes out whole on the other end. Cara Lying Leavitt quit because he was driving her nuts. Whoever would have guessed that working for the world’s most powerful and mentally deficient toddler, could be so difficult? To imagine the United States under Donald Trump today, picture an ant farm violently shaken.

The arsenal is nearly empty. The strategic oil reserve has run dry. Wa, wa, wa, Wall Street is starting to wake up. There was a bloodbath in the bond market yesterday. Markets are down all over the world. The VIX, or volatility index is through the roof. As the 60-day time limit on the memo randumb of misunderstanding expires. Mr. Trump announces, he didn’t have to say a word, but he couldn’t help himself. “There are no negotiations between Iran and the Untied Snakes.” Just kicking those Wall Street brokers right in the nuts. Every time Mr. Trump opens his mouth an angel gets its wings…in hell.

I suspect Mr. Trump is being hard on South Korea because he’s building his alibi. It has to be somebody’s fault, you know, and it couldn’t be his! So it must be their fault! He asked the South Koreans to join him in his crazy war, but they refused. Ergo, any loss or damage now is all their fault. Mr. Trump didn’t ask for NATO’s help because Mr. Trump has insisted time and time again, that he doesn’t need NATO. He couldn’t ask them for help. A quick inventory shows our country is fast running out of allies. But we still have North Korea and what’s left of Russia!

A war, economic turmoil, inflation, zero job growth, and a wobbling Wall Street. What does Mr. Trump want to focus on? Sending his cabinet members out to campaign for Republican congress members. Now, this was Marx Brothers funny. Texas Senator, John Cornyn was a dependable Republican Senator and probably unbeatable in November. But he quarreled with Mr. Trump, so Mr. Trump endorsed Ken Paxton. Paxton has all of the important qualifications to be a fine Trump Senator. He cheats on his wife. His past is riddled with scandals and financial irregularities. He was impeached in Texas by his fellow Republicans! He’s perfect!

Now, for the funny part, I saw a clip from OX News (We’re smart! So you don’t have to be!) Jesse Waters was imploring Paxton to come out and fight! And I quote: “We can’t win this election for you!” Fair and balanced is more than a little upset. They had a sure winner, but they dumped him for Donald Trump’s cock holster. Paxton held a virtual town hall, and the first question he got was, “Why did you cheat on your wife?” And it’s been downhill ever since.

But not to worry, help is on the way! Peterless Pete Hegseth will hit the campaign trail. He’s got nothing better to do! He’ll be glad to pitch in and help! So will Treasury Secretary Scott Bessent. Gosh, everyone likes him! Sending Hegseth is like adding whipped cream to a shit Sunday and Bessent is the cherry on top. Yes, the most important thing for Mr. Trump right now, less than ninety days from the midterms is Republican reelection. “Oh, shit, look at the calendar! We should have started doing this weeks ago! Why didn’t you women remind me before now?”

The phony polls show Mr. Trump’s popularity at 33% You believe that figure, don’t you? Six months ago it was only 30% and now, after starting a senseless war and destroying the economy. Mr. Trump’s popularity actually rises? I would believe 23% but not 33%. There are just some things the media just can’t tell you the truth about ever. Like about aliens and Trump’s polling numbers. There are some questions the media dare not to ever ask. “Where’s your wife at?”

Threatening 50% tariffs on Canada again. Steel, aluminum, fertilizer, lumber, and oil. Threatening to bomb Oman for the crime of trying to reach a settlement. But it’s not the settlement Mr. Trump wants so die, you bastards, die! We’ve traveled through the land of fuck around and have now officially reached the land of find out! Farmers are reporting a bumper crop; they probably won’t be able to sell abroad. Open your history books to page 1932, Chapter one. The farms failed first, after Mr. Hoover had imposed tariffs.

Did you know that when you buy a new computer, it is already obsolete by the time you take it out of the box? The same holds true for the black hole of AI data centers. That two, or five, or ten billion dollar data center will become obsolete in five years. Before it’s half-way paid for. But it is the next big thing! Everybody says so. There aren’t any other next big things on the horizon. So it’s like gold fever. Some will get rich while most will end up just digging a hole in the ground. Nobody has gotten rich yet, in fact, nobody has earned a single dollar yet. And might not ever earn a dollar. But it’s the next big thing!

Yet our distress comes from no failure of substance. We are stricken by no plague of locusts. Compared with the perils which our forefathers conquered because they believed and were not afraid, we have still much to be thankful for. Nature still offers her bounty and human efforts have multiplied it. Plenty is at our doorstep, but a generous use of it languishes in the very sight of the supply. Primarily this is because the rulers of the exchange of mankind’s goods have failed, through their own stubbornness and their own incompetence, have admitted their failure, and abdicated. Practices of the unscrupulous money changers stand indicted in the court of public opinion, rejected by the hearts and minds of men.

True they have tried, but their efforts have been cast in the pattern of an outworn tradition. Faced by failure of credit they have proposed only the lending of more money. Stripped of the lure of profit by which to induce our people to follow their false leadership, they have resorted to exhortations, pleading tearfully for restored confidence. They know only the rules of a generation of self-seekers. They have no vision, and when there is no vision the people perish. – Franklin Delano Roosevelt, March 4, 1932

By David Glenn Cox

It’s a simple case of a few thousand disgruntled, pampered sailors. Former Fox News weekend host and Duh fence secretary, Peterless Pete Hegseth insists the stories of depredations on board the USS Abraham Lincoln are untrue and overblown. Pete’s so on top of things he didn’t even have to call the office to check. Just a bunch of whiners and crybabies. In Pete’s falsetto voice, “Oh, I want deodorant and toothpaste every day! Shut-up and eat your bowl of rice!”

I want to be very careful here because I don’t want to sound in any way unsympathetic about mental health issues. The media immediately jump for the sensational and talk about sailors jumping off the ship trying to kill themselves. I had a friend in the navy who served on a carrier. It happened on nearly every trip. Do the math. 5,000 sailors, young, emotional, and trapped in the service on a long deployment. If you took 5,000 like-aged civilians at random, how many of them had tried to hurt themselves in the last nine months? It’s not the food, but it’s a contributing factor.

Our President, Cankles McBrainfreeze, says the Lincoln hadn’t been out there long enough! “Let them eat cake!” The problem my dear Brutus, isn’t in the stars; it’s in their big mouths complaining to Mummy and Daddy state-side! The Captain of USS Abe Lincoln is probably on his last deployment. He has broken the Navy’s eleventh commandment. “Thou shalt not allow your people to make noise and cause political problems.” Jetson! You’rrre fired!

So, do you know what they did? The president sent the head of CENTCOM to investigate the situation. Jetted half-way around the world and then airlifted to the Lincoln by helicopter. I’m sure that put him in a fine mood for investigating. The President called; he wants to talk to you right away! He sounds angry. The big boss wants this fixed. The big, big boss wants this fixed. Once on board, the Admiral spoke with the Captain and a handful of officers and enlisted men who all answered, “It’s not true!” These sailors get ice cream and sugar cookies, three times a day! Isn’t that right fellows? “Yes, sir!” See? Case closed!

Let’s suppose that when the navy provisioned the Lincoln for her 180 day deployment, they packed in a few extra supplies in case the ship was delayed. Say, maybe ten percent or 18 days’ worth of extra provisions, just in case? Or even 20 percent or 36 days. The Lincoln had been on station 45 days longer than that! It isn’t so much their credibility I question as much as their math skills.

Gee, the president defect says it isn’t so. The Secretary of Warped says it isn’t true, and the big boss from Centcom agrees! Just imagine a twenty-year-old seaman nose to nose with the Admiral, who asks. “Is everything all right? Do you need anything? It’s alright, you can tell me, son. Your career won’t be over until we reach San Diego. Every sailor on that ship now has a black mark by their name. “Served on the Lincoln,” will be whispered about in the navy annals for years to come.

It’s just so hard to know who to believe. High-ranking government officials with everything to lose, and nothing to gain or lowly, sailors out to make the president and Duh fence secretary look bad. For no other reason than just being hungry and filthy. Calling on their mommies and daddies to save them! The nerve! Back when President McBrainfreeze served in Vietnam. Oh, wait, I mean, back when Peterless Pete served in Vietnam. Oh, wait, that was some other war. You didn’t hear Pete complaining about toothpaste or toilet paper. A good soldier knows how to keep his big yap shut! The quickest way to shorten your military career is to complain. See: “Full Metal Jacket.”

Gunnery Sargent Hartman is your friend. You can tell him all your problems. I’m sure he’ll listen to you!

Do you see how this works? The answer to the problem isn’t in correcting the deficiencies in provisioning navy ships or shortening the deployments. The answer is to just shut people up! To imply the ship’s crew are all a bunch of unpatriotic liars. It’s the Trumpian way! Everyone is a liar except for… There’s an old saying in baseball, “Winning cures everything!” As long as you win, no one questions your earned run average. But when you lose, it’s never good enough.

The problem isn’t the overburdened sailors for too long deployed, it’s the bad press! By sending the USS George Washington (He couldn’t tell a lie.) to replace the Abe Lincoln. The US is now fresh out of aircraft carriers in the Pacific. Did you hear that, Korea? The Untied Snakes will not be taking part in joint exercises with South Korea this year, because ah, we’re too busy!

President McBrainfreeze is in big trouble unable to untie the Gordian knot of Iran. The problem weighs heavily on what little mind he has left. Do you know what some people do when they feel psychologically stressed? They shut down and focus on unimportant details. They want the Supreme Court to let them build their ballroom and put their name back on the Kennedy Center. They want the deflecting pool vandals arrested and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law!

Now, this is funny. Mr. McBrainfreeze was suing the British Broadcasting Company for ten billion dollars for disparaging his good reputation. That’s impossible, as he has no good reputation to begin with. But the BBC had asked for discovery, which would force Mr. McBrainfreeze to open up his books to public scrutiny. He doesn’t want that, so, he’s modified his claim. He now wants ten billion dollars just for damaging his personal reputation. Just exactly how could you prove something like that? You can’t! The BBC caused him no financial hardship, but only bruised his fragile ego and good reputation. What good reputation?

Half a league, half a league,

Half a league onward,

All in the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred.

“Forward, the Light Brigade!

Charge for the guns!” he said.

Into the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred.

II

“Forward, the Light Brigade!”

Was there a man dismayed?

Not though the soldier knew

Someone had blundered.

Theirs not to make reply,

Theirs not to reason why,

Theirs but to do and die.

Into the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred.

III

Cannon to right of them,

Cannon to left of them,

Cannon in front of them

Volleyed and thundered;

Stormed at with shot and shell,

Boldly they rode and well,

Into the jaws of Death,

Into the mouth of hell

Rode the six hundred.

IV

Flashed all their sabres bare,

Flashed as they turned in air

Sabring the gunners there,

Charging an army, while

All the world wondered.

Plunged in the battery-smoke

Right through the line they broke;

Cossack and Russian

Reeled from the sabre stroke

Shattered and sundered.

Then they rode back, but not

Not the six hundred.

V

Cannon to right of them,

Cannon to left of them,

Cannon behind them

Volleyed and thundered;

Stormed at with shot and shell,

While horse and hero fell.

They that had fought so well

Came through the jaws of Death,

Back from the mouth of hell,

All that was left of them,

Left of six hundred.

VI

When can their glory fade?

O the wild charge they made!

All the world wondered.

Honour the charge they made!

Honour the Light Brigade,

Noble six hundred! – Alfred Lord Tennyson

By David Glenn Cox

According to Fox News; the President defect was only joking. Ha, ha, funny, funny joke! What? You thought he was serious? You must be from out of town. Just in on the five o’clock turnip truck, maybe? Or maybe you’re from the country or something, unaware or unfamiliar, with our big-city sophisticated ways and Mar-a-Lago humor. “A priest, a rabbi and an aircraft carrier walked into the Persian Gulf!”

Knock, knock. “Who’s there?” Ayatollah! “Ayatollah who?” Ayatollah, this was a bad idea!

You really, honest to God, thought he was serious when Mr. Trump said the Strait of Hormuz would be an American territory? Gosh, that was a real knee-slapper, and you didn’t get the joke? You are dry as dust, aren’t you? Well, I guess it was either that or “Your Mama’s so fat jokes.” Fox News got the joke! They saw the humor. Gosh, he was only joking. Settle down! What’s wrong with you people? When I was just a little boy at my sage mother’s knee, she used to tell me son, never make jokes about wars or funerals.

I know that we’ve all asked ourselves from time to time. Just how far will Fox News bend over backwards to kiss Mr. Trump’s…ring. You and I weren’t the only ones to miss out on the funny, funny humor. Nobody else in the room laughed at the time either. “Is this thing on?” No other media outlets reported the President’s boorish, thug-like remarks as humor. That’s right! He was only joking. Gee, he cracks me up like George Carlin.

Damage control! Report to Fox News stat! The President now tells Fox News, he’s taking a low-profile approach to dealing with Iran. Translation: we’re all out of missiles and we don’t know what to do next. When the going gets tough, run away and hide! Economic sanctions! That’s the ticket! Why didn’t we think of that before? We’ll place financial sanctions on Iran! But other than hockey sticks, golf clubs or shot glasses, I don’t know what else we could place sanctions on? It’ll crush them! Sure, the sanctions didn’t work for the first 47 years, but let’s give them a chance! Any day now, any day. Wait a second, isn’t that what we did BEFORE Mr. Trump started a war?

Remember; George Orwell was an optimist. How do you like propaganda served, Winston? Over easy or scrambled? Not spin or political opinion, but pure dishonest fiction. Big Brother is going to increase the chocolate ration! Eurasia has always been our ally! He was only joking, Winston! Only joking! Repeat after me: “He was only joking!”

Mr. Trump’s comments were so crude and beyond the Pale, that Fox News thought it necessary to interrupt their regularly scheduled bullshit to modify the propaganda drip. Some of the simple simian shit for brains types were starting to wake up and wondering what’s going on? Calm yourselves; he was only joking! Go on back to sleep!

From the files of the Joseph Goebbels Good Time Hour. See BS Nuses, reported Mr. Trump’s comment as a truism, and a foregone conclusion. Iran disputes the Strait of Hormuz as being an American territory. Apparently, they didn’t get the joke either. The fifty states and the Straits, that’s us!

Who knew Cara Lying Leavitt had so many friends out there? Suddenly, with the speed of a light switch, the internet is overloaded and overburdened with identical stores and glories of Cara Lying Leavitt! All of her greatest insults, prevarications, and condescensions aimed towards the press. Those were the daze, huh? It’s the flip side of the Gin-nine Pirro story. Mr. Trump rages at Pirro with an enthusiasm rarely seen. And 24 hours later, the story is gone like D.B. Cooper. No, follow-up stories or editorial thoughts. Shhh! Congressman Ted Lieu inverserated the FBI Duhrector, Krash Patel. Lieu tricked Patel into admitting how serious the Epstein files were. Then leaving Krash to try and explain why so little has been done to date. I hope you have C-SPAN otherwise, shhh!

Not only have Mitch McConnell and Malaria Trump disappeared from sight, but all news and mention of their names has also disappeared. They no longer exist in the public eye, Winston. They were only fictional characters, anyway. Where did they go? “Who?” Mitch and Malaria! “Who? I’ve never heard of them.” Other fictional made-up characters missing include Howard Lutnick (Epstein) Peterless Pete Hegseth (The war) Uproarious comedian of the month Scott Bessent (the economy).

Fox News recently reported on this month’s BLS jobs report. The one with ZERO job growth and twenty thousand job losses as, “Better than expected.” What did they expect? A nuclear accident? That this report was better than expected? “Well, the economy hasn’t collapsed yet. That’s better than we expected!” Even dangerous Donnie has disappeared. But have I got a funny story for you. It was a team-building exercise, that’s what it was! Stories persist that many Trump employees were mildly upset at being used as Trump bait on Air Force None at 40,000 feet.

Boy, oh boy, that was big news there for a minute or two, until people started connecting the word “chickenshit” to describe Mr. Trump’s daring escape. Leaving his staff, guests, and crew to their fates. What’s the matter? Can’t you guys take a joke? Oh, don’t be that way. Your spouses and children would understand… eventually. They died keeping Donald Trump safe! You have no sense of humor at all, do you?

Even the war has largely disappeared from the news dump. Only negative remarks about Iran are allowed. “The Iranians are claiming that they own the Strait of Hormuz! In other news, an eclipse! A man in Iowa grew a six hundred pound pumpkin! And Mittens the kitten won’t be chewing on the extension cord anymore. And also not in the news, and not really very important at all. Europe is suffering from the largest and most prolonged heat wave on record. The majority of the United Kingdom is brown from heat and drought. The El Nino coming is predicted to be the strongest on record. A rare hurricane, the first in almost two centuries, is headed for Hawaii. Forest fires burn in Canada (Our 51^st state).

I sure am glad all of those climate change rumors finally blew over. Otherwise, I’d be worried! Get it? Crop failures, world hunger, bankruptcies and an existential threat to life on Earth! You just have no sense of humor about these things at all, do you?

“Being in a minority, even in a minority of one, did not make you mad. There was truth and there was untruth, and if you clung to the truth even against the whole world, you were not mad.” ― George Orwell,

By David Glenn Cox

My ex-wife would tell you this never happens, but she’s wrong. When I miss one by the distance to the sun. I’ll be the first to admit it. I was wrong, wrong, wrong! I blew it! I was so wrong that we went all the way around the dial until I was almost damn near right again. I incorrectly assumed, (yes assumed, an ass out of you and me.) That the now former press secretary, Cara Lying Leavitt, was ousted basically for not having a penis. And the “wanting to spend more time with her family” story was just a simple ruse to cover-up Mr. Trump’s deep-seated hatred of women. Boy, was I ever wrong! I’m going to have to take down my shingle.

It appears to be a case of the opposite, a case of absence making the heart grow fonder. Ms. Leavitt went on six weeks’ maternity leave, but didn’t manage to get far. Reports say, Mr. Trump called Ms. Leavitt at least 81 times in forty-two days. “Hi! What are you doing?” I’m nursing the baby! “What are you wearing? Hey, guess what we did today? We attacked Iran!” Yes, I know. “When are you coming back to work?” In six weeks!

“Hey, I know it’s after two in the morning. But I was texting some nonsense and thinking of you. What are you doing? We had spaghetti and meatballs for dinner tonight! We sure do miss you down here. When are you coming back to work?” I was so wrong! Apparently, Ms. Leavitt wasn’t fired like most Trump employees for wrongdoing. Ms. Leavitt was creeped out of her job. This creep wouldn’t leave her alone, until she was compelled to turn in her keys, call it a day and change her phone number.

Speaking of missing women, Malaria Trump is still missing! And then suddenly, I was reminded of an episode of Colombo I once saw. This big, important businessman with bad skin, cankles, and a new stick-on muskrat hat. Was being accused of murdering his wife, but Colombo had figured it out. This big, important businessman was also building a new skyscraper. Not a ballroom or anything, but a skyscraper. Construction site? Body? Any similarity to persons living or dead is greatly appreciated.

God bless Mike Lindell! He’s denying he lost an election again. If Mr. Trump had ever employed kamikaze pilots, Mike Lindell would have been the squadron commander. His three-hundred million dollar fortune gone! His successful business gone! It is all gone! And all he had left was Mr. Trump’s endorsement. And a fat lot of good that did him. Mr. Trump’s endorsement and a dollar will buy you a senior coffee at McDonald’s.

Mr. Lindell is claiming voting irregularities in a Primary election he lost by 11 percentage points. (A real nail-biter) Mr. Lindell is accusing his own Republican party of impropriety by cheating their own Trump-backed candidate. Sure, that makes lots of sense! A deep-state, sinister plot by fellow Republicans to cheat and defeat him. But thankfully for us, by Mr. Lindell’s willingness to show his whole butt publicly. Will make any attempt by Mr. Trump to follow suit in the midterms fall flat, hilariously flat. Comic relief to the rescue! No really, somebody go check that construction site! If Mike Lindell were ever cast in Star Wars, he’d be Jar-Jar Binks.

Blessed are the cracked, for they shall let in the light. “Hi! What are you doing right now?” CLICK! There is an old Southern expression used to describe cluelessness. “He doesn’t know whether to shit or ride a bicycle.” It’s public knowledge peterless Pete Hegseth has squandered the arsenal. So what does Mr. Trump do? He threatens more and more ruthless attacks as the Iranians yawn. “The Strait of Hormuz is going to be American territory!” You believe that, don’t you? Would Mr. Trump say it, if it wasn’t true?

You can see the problem, can’t you? Somebody is feeling trapped and in a projecting mode again. “I’ll huff and I’ll puff and BLOW your house down! I’ll punch them in the nose and I’ll kick em in the nuts! I pity the fool! They’ll be sorry they ever fucked around with me!

266 days isn’t long enough for a deployment! The absolute arrogance of a disintegrating intellect. That was the dumbest thing Mr. Trump had said in months. Oh, and you can bet those Navy families will flock to vote Republican in the midterms! For a bonafide draft dodger to say “You need some more of this! Go home? You just got here nine months ago!”

“Hi, what are you doing?” Click!

I’m guessing again, but I’d say the walls are starting to close in on Mr. Trump. His behavior is becoming more reckless, erratic and panicked, until he’s tied himself up in knots. Don Knott’s to be specific, in the nervous man sketch. It’s the skit that made Don Knotts famous. He played a trembling man with a shaky voice, holding a cigarette, while insisting he wasn’t afraid. “Watch everybody! I’ll make the tide come in!”

After we finish with Iran, maybe we’ll take a week off and then it’s off to Cuba! Then Greenland, Canada, Switzerland, and then Fredonia! The more loser he gets, the more bellicose he becomes. Has anyone out there ever read Edgar Allan Poe’s “The Tell Tale Heart.” It’s the story of a murderer who buried his victim under the floorboards and begins going mad hearing their heart still beating. No reason, it just crossed my mind all of a sudden, that’s all. Look for freshly turned earth! Check the closet for muddy shoes!

“Hey, what are you doing right now?” Click!

It’s called a fantasy relationship!

From Mairrage.com: “A fantasy relationship is an imaginary or unrealistic connection between two people. It may involve an idealized version of someone, an exaggerated belief in the potential for a romantic relationship, or a one-sided infatuation.

In a fantasy relationship, one person may project their desires onto another without considering their actual feelings or intentions. It can be an escape from reality, providing a temporary sense of fulfillment, but ultimately it is not a healthy or sustainable way to form a genuine connection with someone.”

“If you still think me mad, you will think so no longer when I describe the wise precautions I took for the concealment of the body.” ― Edgar Allan Poe, The Tell-Tale Heart

“I just have a couple more questions.”