Community Voting for #SxSW2027 PanelPicker is now open, and I would be so very grateful for your ✅ Vote for my workshop submission.

Stories That Endure: Building Legacy Through Story
https://lnkd.in/gF_Ga5Kp

VOTE HERE.

SxSW 2027 will be filled with panels, keynotes, breakout sessions, and workshops, and I've applied for the workshop category.

My workshop session will seek to provide 3 key takeaways for participants:

✔️ Storytelling is a competitive tool/advantage in the world of AI - it creates trust, bonding reputation, narrative, and influence.

✔️ Storytelling that is anchored in your own story, values, and purpose is essential because it drives empathy and authenticity.

✔️ Storytelling that inspires people into action and social movements gets naturally deployed into community and word-of-mouth marketing!

Vote from August 5 to 23!

SXSW picks these sessions by community vote. Not a jury behind closed doors. Every panel/breakout lives or dies on votes cast - would be so grateful for yours!

VOTE HERE.

How do I preserve my privacy in the age of production? A few important things to note: I was born in 1985, grew up in the analog to digital transition, memorized about 5 total phone numbers between the age of 6 and 16, and didn’t get my first cell phone until the end of high-school. I grew up with limited sharing, no social media, and a world where we exchanged our thoughts and deepest feelings and secrets either in-person, letter format, journaling, or while on a walk or talk in nature.

It wasn’t until I moved to Kenya in 2009 that I really began using Wordpress blogging and Facebook to more publicly share about what I was up to in the world, and what I was doing in East Africa to volunteer with the local community and boarding school where I worked. I remember the thrill of sharing my blog posts on Wordpress, carefully uploading a few images of what I was doing, and relishing in typing away. Of course, later on, as Instagram came into the picture, I realized that as a writer and wannabe journalist, I felt this deep joy in penning my thoughts, and receiving likes and feedback from my followers - not necessarily because it boosted my ego, but because it helped my ADHD brain process my thoughts out of my mind and through verbal processing, formulate my conclusions.

Perhaps, over the years, I have been cautioned by my tendency to over-share, to over-publicize my vulnerability and my emotions. At 40, I recognize now that over-sharing is a strong tendency of people with ADHD. It can be our superpower, but it can also be our downfall. My vulnerability has served my growth in my business, speaking engagements, and author journey, but at the same time, I’ve realized how over-sharing personal information on public forums can lead to misperceptions. This is the dichotomy we face today, particularly as a personal brand/founder who is trying to both build her own brand in public, while also representing clients and their brands.

How do I maintain my own personal privacy in the age of production?

Earlier this year, this hit home for me after a jolting personal experience. I had gone public with a romantic personal relationship, brought my digital community into that experience and news, and even helped advance this individual’s professional expertise on LinkedIn. A few months later, this all came crashing down due to his infidelity. Photos were removed, and suddenly, people came texting with that single question: what happened? It was only then that I realized why privacy mattered so much. I was so embarrassed. It felt like my entire world was exposed. It was then and only then that I realized why other friends, partners, family members, colleagues, etc. were so prudent and cautious about what they shared, in the office, publicly, on Instagram, etc. The need to constantly share what they were doing, where they were, why they were doing, etc., simply wasn’t as important to them as the need to simply be quiet and privately live a beautiful life behind the scenes.

My soul has craved this privacy this year. I have wrestled with this deep craving for mystery, privacy, discretion, not sharing as much, etc. Even with my business, my portfolio, my work samples, and connections, I just feel more mindful and protective. Especially in the marketing, brand and content space, it is natural and applauded and encouraged to grow your Instagram following, share daily, populate posts and reels, and to drive awareness forward. I don’t think these are bad things, especially in the corporate brand space, because it is an incredibly powerful and successful way to bring consumers and audiences into your story. Hands down, content is king.

But somehow - I, the recovering over-sharer, feels this beautiful pull towards quiet confidentiality. Look up Quiet Luxury on Pinterest, and there is an entire section dedicated to paint colors that symbolize quiet luxury, lol. Talk to any individual who manages private wealth, a family office, or a family trust, and you know what they’ll say - discretion is key. Talk to anyone going through a deeply personal trial, such as IVF, depression, a death, a disease, a divorce, or a distressing situation - they’ll ask for your silence and discretion. Ask any woman walking through a 1st trimester, they typically won’t share that they are pregnant yet.

Why do I say all of this? Because I think we’re at a critical inflexion point for our generation, especially millennials. How do we live in a world of content creation, when we still want someone to mail us a letter? How do we produce in a world of reels and daily posting, when we actually want to consume less? How do we create and co-create beauty in the world, without feeling the need to have to update everyone on it? I am still toying with the idea of spending an entire year social-media free, and yet, as an agency owner, I can’t afford to do that.

So here’s where I have landed, and I hope this helps you.

1. Share when inspired to share. Don’t feel the pressure to perform, just be a person in a normal world in a normal moment.

2. Share what you’re proud of, who you’re proud of, and why you’re proud of them. For me, sharing about my clients’ work is empowering and fulfilling. I love advancing others.

3. Share moments that you want to memorialize. I have found that scrolling back through my Instagram at this point feels like a storybook of wonderful moments. It can be great to go capture pictures of favorite moments at the end of the year and drop them into framed photos in your house or an album.

4. Always Ask. If you’re about to post or tag a friend in a photo, just ask. They might not want you to share it.

5. Be Present. If you’re thinking more about what you’re trying to share in the moment that the memory is being made, put your phone away and be present with the people you’re with. It goes a long way. You’ll remember. Don’t worry.

I’ll leave you with this. What if part of my business, EJA, actually is not about being the seller, the cheerleader, the promoter, the announcer. What if part of my deepest work and best value-add for clients is being an advisor of discretion? What if the product is invisibility? What if luxury is privacy? What if my silence IS the investment?

Where is your discretion, silence, sealed lips, and wise, discerning confidentiality valued by your family, partners, friends, and co-workers? Do people confide in you? If so, do they fully trust you to not share their information? Do you trust them with YOUR information? How can your personal brand become even more trustworthy, simply through your silence? I’ve know some people in my life that excelled at silence and privacy. I’ve been so jealous of them, because it was like they had this secret weapon - self-control. I am actively cultivating and exercising that muscle. It’s a daily journey of growth and practice.

Are you?

Imagine a conference that feels like adult summer camp with all your colleagues where you get to play, think, exchange ideas, support each other and ask questions of the world. A gathering where social capital, generosity, deep thinking, opening up about failures and challenges is welcomed. Imagine showing up in authenticity and belonging and kindness and knowing people can’t wait to meet you, help you, and connect you to the right people.

What Stephen Sabo and Simon Bailie at Hamptons Tech Week have created is nothing short of special. They have created an annual curated gathering for 200 that defines wealth, growth and success as the people we surround ourselves with, the purpose with which we carry ourselves, and the power of intention.

All the hot topics are discussed — everything from AI, to sports, to supply chain to design to venture capital and investments and the media and content creation landscape today across the U.S. But it’s the people that stand out — hard working, humble entrepreneurs, investors and founders who have failed, and still win.

Our brand and storytelling session — the power of storytelling in our lives, brands and businesses — was so fun, powerful, eye-opening to me, and we appreciated everyone’s feedback and participation!

This is what I had to say.

Everything is Story

We live and breathe narrative every single day.

• The world spins on stories

  • “Story makes us more alive, more human, more courageous, more loving. Why does anyone tell a story? Because it gives the universe meaning and that our lives are not irrelevant, that what we choose or say or do matters, deeply and cosmically.”

• Before there was Instagram, TikTok, newspapers, though, there were narratives and messages exchanged between humans, passed through history. The game of telephone entertains us, because we’re trying to maintain the thread of truth, human to human, passed down.

• The urge as children for our parents to ‘tell us a story’ and ‘what’s the ending’ indicates that we were born for story. ‘Once upon a time’ isn’t merely a moment frozen in time; it’s a beginning, and the beginning of that journey leads us to what? The happy ending.

Stories Matter Because They Move People - and Money.

• We’re hosting this session because we believe our stories collectively matter

• Every day, we tell ourselves stories, hear stories and share stories. Some inspire, some cause us lament, some spur us towards justice and action. No matter what transpires in businesses, and brands, the world spins on stories.

• Relationships are stories. Ads are stories. Instagram posts are stories. Investments are stories. Brands are built around stories. Deals are transacted because of a story and message exchanged.

• In creative briefings for brand and comms work, we operate on a simple concept that I want to share with you today - THINK FEEL DO

  • What do you want believe to think (shifting their belief)

  • What do you want them to feel (which builds trust in you)

  • What do you want them to do (action)

Your Story Is Your North Star - Your Purpose & Why

• Your story drives your entire purpose, North Star, and why.

• If you know your why, and believe in your why, you will influence people to change, action, and ultimately, trust.

• Purpose Statement - what is it? (Who you are + what you believe + who you stand for + how you are supporting them)

Your Story Informs Your Brand (You ARE the brand!)

• Do people trust you? Is your reputation credible? Your brand is what people say about you when you’re NOT in the room

  • If people trust you, they will invest in your brand and business. Not because they necessarily like the product or concept, but because you have proven to them that they can trust you.

• Do people see your truth?

  • AI - will never be Artificial Story. Think how ludicrous this would be. We long for stories that transform abstract facts into true, trusted meaning - that hits us at our core in our soul and forges how to see the world

• Can you successfully go from storytelling to story-selling?

  • YOU are the brand. Whether you realize it or not, every single one of us represents a story. The story of your company, the brand we believe in, a solution that will solve a problem or fill a gap in the market across companies. And you and your story are the channel to that brand?

Stories that sell are anchored in 3 things

• Limitation (problem)

  • Clearly articulated gap

• Solution (answer)

  • Strong Guide or Hero with the solution

• Inspiration (Hero)

  • Moves people, communities and culture to change

• Once upon a time, there was a problem, and this product/service helped Peter, Paul and Mary in XYZ ways and it changed their life for the better in XYZ ways.

• What’s your favorite story? What is the story arch, the bell curve that ultimately ends in a happy ending? (e.g. Batman, Lord of the Rings, Hoosiers, WEMBY)

• What is your favorite Hero story arch? Underdog story?

Where are you right now in your story?

• Where are you in your story?

• Are you in the messy middle? The triumph? Are you at a new beginning?

• What parts of your story do you love right now? Which parts are really hard?

• What story are you telling yourselves? What’s a more empowering story?

• Do you need to tell stories or sell stories?

“All of life is story, story unraveling and revealing meaning. Despite our ability to control circumstances, we are given the gift of being free to respond to them in our own way, creatively or destructively.” - M. L’Engle

Your words and story truly matter. Never forget that. The beginning. The messy middle. The journey itself. It’s not just about the happy ending. It’s about the through-line. The moments in between. The mundane. And the people you meet along the way.

Keep telling and selling stories!

Emily

I should start this post by saying that I find myself nearly halfway through 2026, and I am exhausted. I’ve gone through a tremendous personal loss, driven 3,000 miles to Washington, DC and back to Texas, lived in 4 places in the span of 3 months, moved this past week into a new home, was sick for 12 days, moving into my new rental home only to discover a subtle weed/tobacco smell which my friend sleuthed with me until we found a very obscure fishing box above the fridge filled with loose-leaf weed, tobacco, Vaping liquids, weed bongs, and who knows what else; needless to say, the property manager brought over an air purifier and according to my friend who came over for a glass of wine Friday night, ‘I don’t smell anything.’ Thank God. The icing on the cake this week was my sweet dog’s loss of bladder control smack in the middle of my leather couch post outpatient procedure which really made me laugh, because the poor thing was still loopy from the sedative and she couldn’t help herself.

I’m sure you’re tired too. For most parents, I’ve heard this month is now called ‘Maycember’ which to me sounds like a secretive WWII air bomber mission, but perhaps that’s what it feels like: a zillion things to do and a deep need for an entire team of parachuters to conduct deliveries across every ‘to do’ you have with teachers, schools, sports, final grades and tests, and graduation parties. That doesn’t even cover the summer activities that need to be set up - camps, vacations, swim team, activities, and everything in between. We’re so fixated on ‘entertainment’ and I must admit, what has happened to a culture of rest and savoring summer?

It’s nearly June, and I’ve had lots of nice invites to places in the mountains, beaches, and cities, and I find myself strangely not wanting to go anywhere. To just be. As Gaby Berstein says, ‘Slow down, sister…’ and this strange craving for deep rest. Could laziness actually be respectable? Why do we scold ourselves for indulging naps? (Even my pastor just encouraged the congregation this past Sunday to sabbatical). What would it feel like to enjoy the simpler things this summer, the subtly satisfying small things that really take you back to your childhood days of fireflies and wild berries?

Every summer growing up, my Mom would make this inventive thing called THE SUMMER LIST. I suppose I should caveat this by saying we had a unique upbringing, because I was partially homeschooled, partially in private school, and partially in music school. So when summer hit, my Mom needed to give us kids something that we could mentally time-block as our summer hit-list. It was part-educational, part-fun, but always rewarded at summer’s end with a special reward upon completion. It spanned from late May to late August, and we had three months to tackle it. The best part about it was that it was OUR list to make, and we could generally (within reason) put whatever we wanted on it, even if it meant wood-working or something obscure.

I don’t remember what was on every list. I do remember lattice pies, memorizing state capitals, reading X number of books, and the summer I was supposed to learn to sew (that didn’t go over well.) I do remember one summer I put ‘movie marathon’ on the list and my Mom laughed. I also remember the summer I beat every level of Donkey Kong with my friend on Nintendo, which was a total luxury because we didn’t have video games at home.

So the other day, as I drove down my new street, I noticed this corner bookshelf (V-shaped to tuck into the corner of a wall) listed as FREE on the side of the road from a neighbor, and I did what DIY’ers would do (but what Emily should never do, lol), and I stopped. I found myself curious and staring at this bookshelf, thinking, I think perhaps I want to refinish this. Sand it. Stain it. Re-paint it. Restore it. Long story short, that bookshelf is now sitting in my new backyard, next to the planter box I just found on FB marketplace for $75 and am excited to fill with my garden selections, and I have my DIY projects ahead of me, for sure.

So, here’s the deal. I made my 2026 Summer List. And it feels fantastic. It has brought me more joy than I realized, and I think the contentment of being is really the key. There’s something about summer that allows us to slow down, and really not care. Especially in Texas, it can be really hot, and if you’re up in the mountains, the joy of being is as simple as a long bike-ride or hike, a cold beer, and a sunset view.

So, here’s my list. What’s on yours? Some of my items feel sort of ridiculous, and others more substantive, but what’s great about making a summer list at 40 is that I don’t have to worry about completion necessarily, just enjoying each of these things, day by day, moment by moment.

I reminded my Mom the other day of the list, and how it gave my summer a sense of purpose and creation. Co-creating with my siblings, grounded in nature, and with the quiet voice of God.

Today, outside of running my business, which requires a lot of energy and focus and time, I need those things. Those simple things that are as happy in summer for a child as they should be for us as adults. Here goes.

1. Blueberries - order from New Jersey, freeze in ziplock for muffins and smoothies.

2. Take a Rowing class down at Austin Rowing Club. (Thanks, Becca C…) :)

3. Settle into my new home: hang my artwork

4. Host a lingering summer dinner party in July

5. Play Mahjong with girlfriends

6. Play Tennis again

7. Lots of Pilates

8. Fix my grass in my backyard and plant my summer garden box - lavender, basil, cilantro, peppers, tomatoes.

9. Read 5 books. Not more, because I know it won’t happen.

10. Bake a pie for A250 on 4th of July.

11. Learn how to ride gravel. I have the bike for it, just need the correct tires.

12. Swimming. Join a Master’s program again. I really do love it.

13. Make homemade pesto.

14. Watch a sunset sundowner over a dock or in the mountains.

15. Go to Krause Springs.

16. Go to the Farmer’s Market more this summer.

17. Zilker Park picnic with friends.

18. Hamptons Tech Week in Montauk (already in motion) for work.

19. Pottery Class.

20. Go to see my friend play jazz this summer on Thursday nights.

21. See an outdoor movie.

22. Go to Newport, RI (already in motion) for work. 4th year in a row. Wonderful.

23. Practice piano and take some piano lessons.

24. Write more poetry and actually work on the book I said I would write on ADHD.

25. Make Biscotti again.

26. Restore that darn bookshelf.

27. Take Sunday naps.

28. Hike Maroon Bells Pass from Crested Butte over to Aspen (also in motion but likely more towards September)

29. Actually work on new words in other languages each day.

30. Do Wordle each day on NYGames app. I was in my groove on this before.

31. Try a new restaurant.

32. Make homemade pizza.

33. Babysit for single Mom’s and give them a night off.

34. Get my pics from S. Korea and Japan printed which I still haven’t done since 2018.

35. Close 1 new big client.

36. Book 1 brand workshop for the fall.

37. Book 1 speaking opportunity for the fall.

38. Actually build my online presence on Instagram for my business (EJA).

39. Start a women’s prayer group.

40. Call an out of town friend each week.

As you can see, this is not my summer of big travels or trips. But to be honest, I think sometimes it really boils down to fresh air, laughs, good food, and good company. Wherever this summer might find you, I hope you have one where you really SAVOR the moment and indulge a bit in resting.

Sending everyone love and light,

Em

So, in partnership with Hamptons Tech Week, I’m excited to share that Emily Jacob Agency and my wonderful co-host and award-winning producer Andrea Mitchell are convening a women’s breakfast program on June 3 under the umbrella of #nytechweek and as a HTW-adjacent event.

This gathering is curated for female founders, businesses, and builders shaping what’s next across tech, media, sports, wellness, and culture, and will sit at the intersection of storytelling, brand, wellness, and leadership.

Together with former-UN specialist Dr. Vandana Arcot, we’ll explore #storytelling as a catalyst for business growth, brand, and community building. I’ll discuss storytelling strategies that provide human-centric connection and persuasion, and Vandana will discuss the ethics + dignity of storytelling w/ beneficiaries of non-profits globally.

But beyond the reel, this conversation goes deeper, with a segment on #restorying featuring Toni Filipone of MasterGrief™ Academy (trained with Tony Robbins) who will share insights on scaling businesses while navigating loss, pivots, challenges.

Work and business doesn’t happen in a vacuum. It happens alongside real life and loss —moments of pressure, uncertainty, and disruption that rarely make it into the headlines. Earlier this year, I went through shocking loss in my personal life, and so this discussion freshly hits home.

We’ll conclude by exploring some great ‘storyselling’ from sponsors providing in-kind products and services, who will share what they’re working on and how we can support them and their budding businesses + platforms.

Huge thanks to our sponsors:

@narratively | storytelling platform + humanity

@jonesroadbeauty | toxic-free beauty reinvented

@abundant_village.mm | conservation + empowerment in Africa

@vund.newyork | candles supporting farmers + bee conservation

@sama.yoga.house | yoga + wellness retreats

@branchbasics | safe cleaning for the home

@wolfferwine | sustainable winery

@drinkesspo | espresso + soda

We have 50 spots available. RSVP here: https://luma.com/m0es16r3

Huge thanks to Stephen Sabo Simon Bailie Weston Woodward for introducing me to #HTW and for graciously giving us the space to bring incredible women together.

I’m so thankful for brand-building community. This will be fun!

But what if there is a third way to look at tax season? For me, it’s a sort of obsessive moment where all my finances, expenses, business costs, and spending comes full circle and I do a big audit on my entire financial ecosystem and outlook. We’re talking every T crossed, every I dotted, every square footage and mileage counted to the tee.

Yes, we owe the IRS, but we also owe it to ourselves to scrub the spreadsheets and review what we spent (and saved). For me, it’s a fun exercise that all originated when my Dad patiently sat down with me and taught me TurboTax. Every February, for many years, he walked me through how to do my own taxes, note my deductibles, and ensure that I properly accounted for all my deductions and charitable donations.

Growing up, my very first MySpace account was called Show Em the Money. I laugh now at my intuitive Tom Cruise-style declaration to the world, but in some ways, that’s what we’re saying to the IRS: show me the money. I’ve paid in. Now you pay me. In a perfect world, this is how it comes back; in some cases, it doesn’t work like that.

While I am not coming away this year with a lot back, I decided to play the long-term game and become an S-Corp. An S Corporation (S Corp) is a tax designation for LLCs that meet IRS requirements, allowing profits and some losses to pass through directly to owners’ personal income without being subject to corporate tax rates. This structure avoids double taxation, as the entity pays no federal income tax; instead, shareholders report income on personal returns. So, now Emily Jacob Agency is an S-Corp, which saved me thousands of dollars this year, thanks to my CPA.

It’s a great opportunity for business owners to treat themselves as employees, taking a "reasonable salary" (subject to payroll tax) and receiving remaining profits as distributions (not subject to self-employment tax). As my business has evolved, I’ve been delighted to grow and realize that this play (becoming an S-Corp) will enable me to grow long-term and reinvest BACK into Emily Jacob Agency (EJA). With some additional checks and balances in place, I’ll be able to align my business expenses/monthly estimated “payroll” to the quarter, and then earmark dollars for business development, operations, and marketing.

One of the primary ways I invest back into my business is through events/conferences. First, all travel can be deducted as business expenses, and mentally, it feels like a free vacation in a way. This year, I’m heading to Hamptons Tech Week, Newport Global Summit, and Story conference in Nashville come October. These are well-spaced trips that I know will yield additional education/learning, new peer relationships, and hopefully, new prospects. While I do enjoy setting aside time for a traditional vacation, I find myself often very happy carving out shorter trips where I can still enjoy a new city or place, food, and the sites, without compromising my ability to stay on top of client communications/deadlines. It fills my cup to get out of my ‘office’ and opens the door for me to constantly balance desktop work with real-life interactions. Carving out time for these always yields fruit. I have never once regretted setting aside time to grow, learn, meet new people, and invest in myself.

There are a variety of other multiplier effects to consider if you are a small business owner. A dedicated accountant. A credit card that works for you with points. Ensuring you earmark percentages of your home wifi (if you are WFH), cell phone, office space to tax deductions. Ensuring you keep all of your business operational costs (e.g. Slack subscription, Docusign, AI, business insurance, etc.) all within a dedicated account. The list goes on. But, in my opinion, the number one way to TRULY ensure you cross every T and dot every I is to download your monthly card statements into CSV files, and literally spend a few hours on a Saturday scanning your expenditures. The beauty of having ADHD in these moments is that you become a sort of hyper-focused sleuth. I cannot tell you the joy of finding random expenses and realizing, ahh, that too was a cost out of the business. I forgot about that. For example, I recently found out that Dropbox and Adobe had been charging me for months when I didn’t use them! I called customer service on both fronts, and got a lot reimbursed.

If you struggle with finances and have ADHD, you’re not alone. Did you know that people with ADHD routinely struggle with managing their money? Here’s a tip:

Assign a "Money Minute" or "Hour": Dedicate a regular, scheduled time (e.g., every Friday morning or month) for a quick review of finances. I use the app, Albert. I check every single transaction, filing it under the correct category, then look to see how it fits into the broader scope of my personal spending / business costs. It’s a fantastic little practice. I think we can tend to be overwhelmed with financial management, as if it’s the thing that will take hours and hours every week. Make it game. Make it fun!

So, whether you owe the IRS or not this year, don’t forget to count every penny. And perhaps practice a new protocol I’ve implemented into my life: instead of impulse spending, I force myself to wait for at least two weeks. I ask myself, do I REALLY need this? If two weeks go by, and I’m really feeling like I do, I consider buying it. If I feel neutral, I wait another two weeks. What transpires is amazing. Oftentimes, the weeks go by and I realize I don’t really need it after all. Of course, this doesn’t apply to things like groceries and gas. But, it really does help oneself think of how to create space between the stimulus and the response. And therein lies your spending power :)

Happy Sunday and tax week - you’ve got it.

Samuel Gegen, CEO of The Wealthy Founder, runs a fantastic podcast called “The Million Dollar Seller.” We had the chance to chat earlier this year on his podcast, and explore secret-sauce qualities that people with ADHD have. Some of these skillsets can actually propel your business / sales forward, and we discussed how to cultivate self-awareness around these so that you can catalyze them for good.

Don’t worry, we made fun of ourselves too :) There are certain things we both acknowledged we need to be aware of at all times and discussed how to be cautious with certain habits or tendencies that can also backfire on you in business.

Take a listen! Have a great day! Emily

Follow Sam here: @samuelgegen @thewealthyfounder

Samuel Gegen, CEO of The Wealthy Founder, runs a fantastic podcast called “The Million Dollar Seller.” We had the chance to chat earlier this year on his podcast, and explore secret-sauce qualities that people with ADHD have. Some of these skillsets can actually propel your business / sales forward, an…

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That said, and as most of you know, I’m spiritually inclined, so I’ve been pondering this recent ‘interruption’ in my life and reflecting on how to maximize the situation. As I’ve been processing a personal loss, which led me back home, I have had the opportunity to catch up with family, old friends and colleagues over the past few weeks. In these conversations, I’ve found myself openly shedding tears with people who have shared with me their own personal setbacks, losses, and interruptions:

• A friend diagnosed with Parkinson’s Disease due to a catastrophic exposure abroad that she never expected.

• A friend who will never cycle again and has to sell her beloved bike due to extreme back injuries that may never fully recover even with surgery

• A friend who will lose his favorite house in a divorce settlement

• A woman who couldn’t get pregnant for 9 years, finally had her first child, and then watched as her newborn passed away due to an oxygen mishap at birth

• Job loss at an extremely unhelpful time

• My professor (who in fact was my first paid subscriber on Substack) who suddenly passed away last week due to an extremely aggressive cancer that he only found out about in January

• A family I know who lovingly adopted a girl and fell in love with her, and then recently have had to recalibrate their expectations due to the father suddenly demanding custody and coming back into the picture

• An investment gone wrong / South, ending in a major financial setback and loss

• Watching aging parents slow down with pesky injuries and hip pain that screams at him day in and day out and constantly reminds him of his fleeting youth

By now, you’re probably depressed reading this, but here’s the point. What do we do with these sudden and real 180’s of life that come out of nowhere, smack us in the face like an inbound wave that we didn’t see coming, and takes our breathe away?

When your heart is cracked open once again, that is where the Light gets in, according to Rumi. But sometimes, when your heart cracks open, it just feels hollow, not happy. It’s just raw. And real. And really difficult. As I have been walking through my own struggle, I have realized that human to human - when two people who are both facing loss sit together for coffee and collectively grieve - it’s powerful. And it’s meaningful in a way that could never have been before. Because it’s vulnerable.

What if loss is not a pesky interruption? What if it’s a powerful invitation?

Not to sit there and mope and feel sorry for myself or others. But simply to let all that is broken be. To let myself be in the process. To be present with others in THEIR process. And to honor what it means to truly be human: to be someone who has loved and lost. Whether we love and lose a person, a career, a physical ability, money, a way of life, a season of life, or dare I say it, even just momentum, it is OK to just be.

I don’t like to be. I like to do. I like to stay busy and have momentum, not monumental life occurrences that I didn’t ask for. But what if these interruptions can truly be transformed into invitations? If I had not gone through what I’ve gone through, I wouldn’t have ended up back in the DMV, and I would not have had powerful coffee conversations with people I love. I would not be able to sit with them, watching them cry, and say, I don’t know why this has happened, but I love you and even in the sadness, there is brightness. There is light. There is hope. And there is community.

I was out in the Hill Country of Texas in February, and after trekking my way through the ‘pesky interruption’ of annoying traffic on a Friday, I finally arrived at my destination. And in a sudden moment of perfect timing, I saw this rainbow form in the sky, after a rainstorm. I stopped my car and got out to take pictures. I smiled. Not because the rainbow was beautiful, but because it was a powerful invitation. A promise. A reminder that beautiful things exist even in the question marks of life.

A few weeks later, same story. A storm, followed by this sunset. Cotton-candy pink.

I don’t know what you’re personally going through, but wherever there is bright sadness in your life - the losses and the hopes of the future and the Not Yet, I pray you’ll find the courage to view these things as powerful invitations, not pesky interruptions. Even interruptions can be beautiful if we let them.

The list went on. I was told to repeat each word back, confirming what I had heard, and responding through the giant headphones that swallowed my adolescent ears.

My Mother had sent me into the doctor to have my hearing tested. A neighborhood Mom had told her that she thought perhaps I had a hearing problem, albeit I now know I was simply an ADHD kid, running around the neighborhood yards playing.

I remember I felt ashamed. Me? A hearing problem? It felt odd, like I was potentially deaf with a percentage of my hearing not working, when I knew fully well that I could hear just fine. But, as we all know, there is a difference between hearing and listening. And I was 8 or so. I had yet to learn that art which I now relish as a learned quality.

“To listen is to lean in softly with the willingness to be changed by what we hear.”

―Mark Nepo

This quote has been absorbed into my soul this past year. Throughout my ADHD discovery period, I realized that what I was really seeking was a better understanding of human relationships, of people, of discovering the art of persuasion, negotiation, business and personal relationships, and ultimately, the willingness to be changed.

My Mother often said growing up to us kids, “Listen Til It Hurts.” She didn’t have music blasting in Soul Cycle or Airpods in mind when she dubbed this phrase. She was talking about a commonly known concept: you have two eyes, two ears, and one mouth - use them in that proportion. She meant, listen, then keep listening, then keep listening even more to your audience. Care about what they’re saying. Absorb their perspective. Lean into it. Take in every word. Then, be changed by it.

In today’s world, what I find difficult is that we are moving at such a colossal pace, even if we are ‘listening’ to someone’s video reel on Instagram, or reading what they wrote on a channel, our attention scale is so limited, we can barely stop long enough to be changed by what we are hearing. Every day, we take in thousands of words and messages, and at best, stop for about 10 seconds on any particular post being shared.

How are we supposed to truly listen? How are we supposed to be changed by what we are hearing? When you have ADHD, how do you ‘turn off’ the other conversations rattling around in your head and close all the tabs in your brain so that you can fully absorb what is being said?

It’s amazing to me how subconsciously we don’t even realize the dance in conversations occurs less in the talking, and more in the pause and silence and asking of questions. To evoke and elicit a response - to dig up and out something from someone’s soul in conversation - now THAT is magic. When you can sit with someone’s commentary, and then pause, and then ask another question, is truly the height of maturing to me. It’s not so much that what you have to say isn’t important. It’s that whatever the person is saying in that moment is MORE important, because they are quite literally in the middle of a discovery process that cultivates their soul.

As I have walked through my growth journey in harnessing my skills and strengths with ADHD, there is one practice I have learned that has truly helped me, especially in business conversations. Yes, there are AI tools for recording meetings and those are helpful, too. But here is one magical phrase I often use that helps me reiterate my listening skills. And it’s this.

“Thank you for sharing that perspective. What I’m hearing you say is……….__________” (then fill in whatever the other person is saying.)

I often implement this in conversation. Not to sound redundant or formal. Simply to assure my counterpart that indeed, I heard them. You can then follow that with, “Is that accurate?”

Many years ago, my sister asked me to stop doing something that annoyed her. And to be honest, when she first shared this feedback, it really hurt my feelings. But after sitting with it, I realized she was right. It was correlated to a common mistake we make in our listening skills, which is what I fondly call, ‘Death by association.’

Yes. It’s true. You can literally kill a conversation or the vibe by overly-associating YOUR personal experience with whatever the person is saying. This is a common trait for people with ADHD. We love to feel connected to someone else by saying, “Oh, I know how you feel. Once, when I was __________, I went through that too …” You feel a need to emotionally connect to that person through shared experience. But that isn’t listening. That is associating someone else’s current experience with your own from the past, which may or may not be helpful. Not everyone wants to hear in that moment how you went through a similar situation and overcame it, because in that moment, your hearer simply wants you to ENTER the door of their experience.

Empathy comes from the root word, Empathia, which represents the ability to feel how others feel (the “sharing” of emotional state). Did you know that people with ADHD have a heightened ability to feel their feelings, AND YOURS? It’s true. I can feel your feelings (shocker). I used to think it was odd, that somehow I could sense in a social setting if there was one person who stood out like a sore thumb, because I could tell that they were lonely or scared or sad or awkward. True story, once I even sensed that someone was struggling in their coming out and homosexual orientation, and I gently asked him if he was gay, and he immediately welled up in tears, and asked me, ‘How did you know?’ The truth is, I didn’t KNOW, I FELT he was.

That said, because people with ADHD often experienced a heightened level of emotion, due to high sensory sensitivity and a hyper-focus on a specific feeling, they can actually leverage this in two ways for good:

1. You can read the room, and read people well. This is a superpower. Don’t lose it, but don’t make people feel awkward by forcing your ‘sensing’ on them unless they know them really well.

2. Your ability to empathize with people’s experiences, situations, struggles is a pure gift. Entering into others’ sorrows, trials, and tears is truly a gift that not all have.

To play devil’s advocate, here are two ways this does NOT serve you.

1. You’re a chronic people-pleaser. You live to ensure other people are happy, love you, and approve of you. Empathy without boundaries is dangerous, and empathy without self-awareness and respect can be detrimental. Like my therapist once told me, throw a drowning person a rope, help pull them to shore, but never drown with them if they are drowning themselves.

2. Intensity of feelings. Feeling deeply, widely, broadly is beautiful. But not everyone is feeling something as intensely are you are feeling it, and you don’t want to overwhelm, consume, or over-water their own processing of XYZ.

My Grandmother was the ultimate listener. She listened til it hurts. She listened and listened and listened and listened. She sat at her kitchen table with her green tea and was always there to listen, to absorb, to emotionally hold in safe-keeping what I needed to say. The ultimate test of a great listener is not the one who hears, but the one who holds. They are able to hold your words, your heart, your fears, and absorb it all with you. The one who is home to you, the safe haven, the sponge of your heart.

I would like to think I have grown in listening at 40. My colleague back in the day would scratch their head and say, ‘I heard something else in that meeting yesterday.’ Isn’t that funny, when we completely walk away from a conversation with a different outcome, experience, or conclusion? I know I frustrated a few colleagues along the way over the years, and if that was you, I’m sorry. I suppose I was stuck in my own head. And that’s the beauty of people with ADHD. We can hold onto a LOT of information and feelings and knowledge and happenings.

But, truthfully, at the end of the day, I am learning to love my quieter mind, saying less, and living with silence. It’s freeing. It’s freeing to enter a conversation and not feel the need to say anything. I don’t have to have an opinion, win, or ramble. I can just be. Be present. Be supportive. And, be two ears with a heart that listens til it hurts. And, isn’t that what we all want? To be heard from the heart.

Happy Friday!

We carried on into the conversation, catching up about the latest happenings of the week. But the fact that he called and said Happy New Year to me sparked within me a new chapter that needs to begin today on Substack. Perhaps it’s been resistant inside of me because I am afraid to begin again. A new book. A book that feels laden with double-meaning right now. A book that still doesn’t have a publisher or book agent (yet). A book that has offended some, and a book that I’ve been told can’t fly without a scientist or psychologist backing it.

But here I am. I sat down to write at my sunny winter desk and lo and behold, my inbox had something comical in it. A new subscriber paying me $8 monthly for my writing. Someone who had never heard of me, but found me through this portal of the internet that once again proves abundance comes from peculiar sources in our lives. So, in honor of my new $8 monthly subscriber, I am here to share the beginning of what feels like a magical new book. So near and dear to my heart, vulnerable, fresh, and perhaps even a bit cheeky.

It all started with Mona Lisa. You see, when I first sat down to be tested for ADHD with my psychiatrist this time last year (in 2025), I entered her office in trepidation, awaiting my verdict: guilty of lack of attention, guilty of big emotions, guilty of jumping in conversations, guilty of interrupting, guilty of poor listening skills.

But then the question came:

“Emily, imagine if you were standing in front of the Mona Lisa in the Louvre, and as you stood there, all the TV’s on in your head, buzzing in the back of your brain, were completely silent. How would that feel?”

And there she was, Mona Lisa smiling back at me in my brain. I laughed out loud.

I looked at my therapist, and said, how ironic. When I was in the Louvre with my family back in 2018 in Paris, I stood in front of the Mona Lisa. I remember watching all these admirers, gazing at Da Vinci’s masterpiece, in solidarity and complete awe and stillness, and all I could think was, “What in the world do they see that I don’t? How can they just stand there staring at her for so many minutes?”

In that moment, I knew I was going to like my therapist. I no longer feared the result. It wasn’t punishment. It was a portal. A window into new ways of seeing the world. New ways of being. New ways of being transported into the present moment. I wondered how many years I had had those TV’s on in the back of my head. Missing things that people said, missing moments, missing key experiences and reading the room in a world of noise. I wondered, could the stillness really be that simple? Could I turn off all the noise in order to be so fully present with the Mona Lisa moments of my life? What would that feel like?

We proceeded with the rest of the assessment. After 2 hours, I left with tears of gratitude welling up in my eyes. Not because the magic pill had been prescribed. But because I finally felt understood. Understood in a world that didn’t quite know what it felt like to have multiple conversations going on in my head ALL THE TIME for 40 years. A world where I couldn’t even find my own stillness to listen to my own soul because everything was abuzz inside of me.

There is a whole mound of stories to be told in the months that followed. A year marked by slow, steady change - in my brain, emotions, executive function, work, relationships and more. As I settled into my medication, I remember walking on a trail one day (about 3 weeks after I had taken it daily), and I began crying. The fog had cleared and I took a deep breath and remember thinking, I think I’m finally seeing them: the Mona Lisa Moments of my life. All these moments I feel I have missed.

You see, ADHD medication increases dopamine and norepinephrine in the prefrontal cortex, which enhances executive function, improves focus, and reduces hyperactivity. This shift allows the brain to filter distractions, regulate impulses, and quiet mental chatter, resulting in a calmer, more focused, and less rushed state.

Noradrenaline is a neurotransmitter that helps regulate physiological and behavioral responses, including stress response, alertness, memory, impulsivity and attention. In particular, it helps with long-term memory formation, which is critical for work and life and relationships.

Suddenly, I had a Batman in my brain. Fighting for me. Helping me. Battling the demons of Gothman City. Knocking out the noise of the city streets and police. Literally — clearing the way for my brain to operate at its best on the front lines of life. And there you have it. A little helper flying around inside of Emily’s brain.

All of my Mona Lisa Moments suddenly began appearing. I remembered things from short conversations with girlfriends, and asked about them a few weeks later. Big tasks not only seemed surmountable, but I could also block out the noise AND successfully crank out key documents, projects, and deliverables FASTER.

I grieved. I grieved for the years that I didn’t have a diagnosis. Or answers. Or any clarity of why people kept telling me I was a bad listener. It felt like being slapped on the hand over and over again, like a child not able to see letters clearly in the 1800’s, when perhaps the child simply needed glasses and didn’t know that was the solution.

I close my eyes and go back to the room in the Louvre. Dozens of people surround me, reverently witnessing Da Vinci’s masterpiece. Some in silence, some talking. The noise and crowd fade. All I see is Mona Lisa. Mona Lisa looking at me with her half-smile, almost smirking at me, letting me know that maybe she had ADHD too and had a hard time sitting for Leonardo. I can only wish I knew. But there she is, and I finally SEE her. Really see what she was trying to say to all of us. What Leonardo was trying to say. And I stare back at her, smiling myself.

Her ambiguous expression makes me question the emotion of the moment, and what Leonardo was trying to capture. The mystery of Mona Lisa remains today, but her legacy lives on, and perhaps that was point - he had to leave her mysterious so that everyone could formulate their own entree into her personality and mood, and meld into an agnostic expression that captures the very feeling of so many people with ADHD: I feel now. I feel always. I feel everything. I feel what you’re feeling.

Wherever February takes you, may you silence the noise around you in a meaningful way so that you can fully focus on what lies directly before you - not around you, not behind you, not out in front or above you. Simply what is here now, here, presently.

If you’re reading this, it’s because you’ve been a part of my community over at Flodesk for the past 5 years. Here on this platform, I’ve launched my book, my business, and shared life updates along the way.

For the past year, I’ve slowly been building here on Substack. Of course I love it - their core brand is Dutch orange :)

As long-form writing has made its great comeback, I’ve been integrating more of my thought leadership and workflow here, along with writing about a new book I’ve been working on around ADHD in life, love, and work. I’ve been craving a place that could reach beyond sending emails into an inbox, with the potential to build conversation and community. Substack allows me to do this, along with a curated platform of resources and tools.

What’s the catch 22 for you? Well, you’re already “in” per se: I’ve moved your subscription over here, so you won’t miss a thing. What you currently receive in your inbox is not going behind a paywall, so no hidden go-arounds there. Still free.

As you explore Substack yourself, I encourage you to find micro-communities where amazing conversations are taking place around a host of topics. In a world of media, news, social media, and X/Twitter, it’s important to find a space where you can hear from real people in the real world with real issues and thoughts. That’s Substack.

I’m thankful you’re here. I believe this new “home” has the potential to broaden my business, workshops, and growth. I hope you will be a part of this journey with me!

As the third of four kids, TV time was precious, sought after, and fought over. Sandwiched between two boys, I found myself often watching things like A Bridge Too Far and John Wayne. Naturally, as a young girl, I didn’t always gravitate towards these shows, so unless it was “my TV time” (utilized with a simple 30 or 60 min ticket turned into my Mother), I walked away from the living room and decided to go do something else: time outside in nature, swimming, reading, crafts.

As we grew up, we practiced piano, made a weekly trip to the local library where I was delighted to discover and bring home a whole LandsEnd bag of books to dive into. We made pies in the summer, swam on swim-team, and naturally, used encyclopedias.

I’ll never forget my Dad carrying a very large heavy computer from my Grandpa’s DC apartment into the basement. My first experience with it included playing Oregon Trail, AOL Online, and Ditka Football. I’ll never forget setting up my MySpace account and the first time I ever searched for something on the world-wide-web. I also remember watching my friend Stephanie send a “text message” from her car for the first time.

All this said, years flew by and I suddenly found myself working for Samsung: a mobile phone, technology company that was elevating people’s ability to connect, building incredible apps and things like VR, and most importantly, connected devices. I spent nearly 5 years telling and selling their products on Capitol Hill through storytelling, PR, and public affairs efforts. It was a dazzling time of my career.

Then in 2018, while working in Seoul, I was asked to work with Samsung UK on a project around screen-time and children. We called it Well Connected. It was a public health + tech + social impact project, and together with my colleague from Switzerland, we set to charter the program leveraging Samsung’s native app features.

Two years later, COVID hits. And suddenly I find myself again, helping craft and write a narrative on ethical technology under the Deloitte Purpose Office. The ethical technology team wanted to develop a POV on privacy, transparency, and tech use. They too, wanted and needed to develop a corporate position on it, as they served clients around the world, both in technology and other adjacent industries. Once again, I found myself helping craft messages and narrative around this.

5 years later, here we are and I find myself thinking about AI every day. I don’t use it every day, but at every turn, it’s generally on my mind. What do I believe about it? Can I approve of it, and all the water data centers are using? Will it truly replace countless job functions? Am I even competitive anymore without it? What exactly should I learn and how should I become an expert in XYZ elements of AI tools?

More and more companies are developing their corporate and brand positions on AI, not only for their sales/business goals, but also for employees, agency partners, and marketing functions. Media, brand, and PR agencies are being called into account for HOW they are using it, and how it bakes into their agency fees. Everywhere, people want to know what your position or stance is, and yet there seems to be a sliding scale on what the actual benchmark or ‘truths’ are around AI from an industry standpoint. It is hard to measure and price on an estimate, and many companies are hesitate to hire agencies/consultancies simply based on a nice-sounding AI belief statement.

Too much is changing every day. We simply cannot land the plane because we’re building it as we fly it still.

That said, I want to propose three ways I am currently thinking about AI as I continue to build my own consultancy: Adaptive Intelligence, Agile Ingenuity, and for fun, Always Interesting (I’ll explain that one in a minute).

1. Adaptive Intelligence: there is nothing artificial about intelligence in a human-sense. Intelligence is something you can be born with, but it is often a marker of your diligence, knowledge-seeking, experience, learning, growth, and wisdom. Intelligence is both street smarts, and book smarts. Both are needed IMHO. To have adaptive intelligence is to take your tools and knowledge and creatively apply them into new environments, situations, problem sets. It is to ADAPT your solutions from previous situations into new cases. My concern with AI is less about the actual output; it is more with the spoon-feeding that is occurring. Where is our critical thinking? Where is our ability to navigate complex problems, adapt, and actually solve for issues without being spoon-fed? AI is fantastic and can help us reach new angles and to examine things with support. But let’s not forget that when the BP oil spill happened, it wasn’t because a human had it wrong. It was because a human had a gut check based on their own engineering and calculations, and then a group of decision-makers decided to go with what the computer said was fine, even though someone blew the whistle based on their own estimation. To use intelligence artificially and robotically is tragic; to use intelligence adaptively is supreme.

2. Agile Ingenuity. Ingenuity is to be inventive and original and clever. Have you ever seen a dog do a trick and it shocks you, because it feels like it came out of nowhere and you didn’t teach your dog that actual trick? Welcome to humanity and ingenuity. Humans are made for agility and quick-witted movements, mental concepts, mapping, and messages. We are born to be inventive, and clever. I love watching kids take an art project or craft and come up with their own creation. If given a basic set of instructions, children will take those guideposts and then get to the end result or solution in their own way. I used to do this with geometry questions. For some reason, my teacher couldn’t figure out why I wouldn’t follow the steps and I always followed my own steps. My answers were rarely wrong. But I had my own pathway of reaching the solution. If we all “bake” our questions into AI in the same way, funneling in inputs and spitting out outputs that become homogeneous, I am worried we will stop being clever. Did you know that Handel wrote Handel’s Messiah in less than 25 days because of the King’s request? Beethoven used to cut off the legs to his own piano because he came deaf, and needed to hear the beat. Einstein was praised for his mathematics, Nash for his work at Princeton, the list goes on and on. I want to live and work in a world where I am inspired by, and inspiring others, through ingenuity that is agile.

3. Always Interesting. The most interesting person at a dinner party is never the one who is necessarily the richest, best dressed, or most pristine in their title. It is the person who like my childhood family friend, Geoffrey, literally used to take new vocabulary words, drop them on index cards, stuff them up his jacket sleeve, memorize the meaning of the word, and then challenge himself to use it at a party in sentence and context of the conversation. Brilliant, right? How do we maintain a workforce and society that is always and ever interesting? This is where differentiation, brand voice, and POV’s come in from executives, brand leaders, and agencies. People don’t necessarily want to hire the person or consultancy or company that is cookie-cutter. They want, well, whoever is INTERESTING. Think about it. Who and what makes you curious? Why are you drawn to certain ads during the Superbowl? Why do you want to read certain books and articles? What makes you go back over and over to the same podcaster? It’s because they are interesting, not predictable. AI is becoming more predictable (I still get outputs sometimes that feel really off.) But how do we draw the line between predictable models and outputs and creative genius and maintaining being interesting? I want to die an interesting person surrounded by interesting friends and community. Do you? :)

Those are my humble thoughts on AI right now. Feel free to comment if interested. Thanks for listening!

I landed on 40 reflections that I believe have been helpful lessons that can guide me into my next decade. Perhaps some feel obvious, but I suppose it is the bread and butter of life that ends up mattering the most. I hope you enjoy these.

1. Prayer doesn’t always change circumstances, but it always changes me.

2. Stay in your lane — comparison steals your joy.

3. You don’t need 20 best friends — you just need a few good ones that show up.

4. Talking about others behind backs almost always gets revealed and destroys relationships and trust.

5. When I don’t fully understand myself, it’s comforting to remember God does.

6. Eat the cookie, the pie, the treat.

7. You don’t need a scale to know you’re a healthy human.

8. Getting up early never disappoints. Win the day.

9. Trust is built in repetitions, and broken in a single moment.

10. If you can forgive someone who hurts you but never says sorry, you’ve won.

11. Kindness is everything. Kind leaders are always people that attract talent.

12. Actions over words. Be your word. If you can’t, re-negotiate.

13. Silence doesn’t mean you don’t have anything to say; it means you value what others are saying more.

14. Get a dog. Sadie saved me.

15. Start saving for a house when you’re 20. I wish I had.

16. There is no sequence of big events for an ideal, perfect life. You are on your own timeline. And that’s OK.

17. Being alone is very different than feeling lonely. Learn to be alone. Travel alone. Sit alone. Read in silence. Cook with music playing. No partner can ever fully satisfy you. Be comfortable with yourself.

18. Move abroad. Experience other cultures. Say hello to people in their language. It makes a huge difference, and will teach you more than any class.

19. Be generous, expecting nothing in return. Love has no conditions or paybacks.

20. Ask for what you want — how will someone know if you don’t say something?

21. Do hard things. Consistency is greater than the end result and will teach you more about steady progress than one big finale.

22. Love is never wasted — even when it hurts, breaks you, betrays you. Your love was real and another persons’ choices doesn’t minimize the love you gave.

23. Your mother is almost always right. :). That one is for you, Mom.

24. It’s rare to meet people in life that you instantly connect with. Don’t discount that. Nourish it and recognize incredible soul mates when worlds collide.

25. Keep a journal. Processing your own thoughts and emotions before venting and dumping does a world of good.

26. Less is more: cut your email in half and say what you need to say in less words.

27. Never approach your boss or client with only the problem; if you’re going to share the problem, you better have prepared the solution. They will respect you for it.

28. Read the room. Read the room. Read the room.

29. You should never ask people to pay you back if it’s under $20 dollars. Be classy. It always comes back.

30. If someone is acting strangely towards you, not getting back to you, going rogue, or they’re in a mood, guess what? It’s most likely not about you! :) Don’t overpersonalize people’s behavior. I did for way too many years.

31. Mastering something matters. Piano, art, language, language, etc. practice doesn’t make perfect, it makes permanent. And people appreciate your skill.

32. Expect miracles. If you look out for them, ask God for them, you’ll see them.

33. Release the need to understand. Or over-explain.

34. Always meet people on planes, if they let you. I have met more interesting people on planes than in many networking events. I have built new clients on planes.

35. Pick at least one person a year that is smarter, wiser and more knowledgeable than you and ask them to mentor you. Schedule 3-4 calls per year.

36. Look up! Don’t look back, around, or too far ahead. Keep looking up.

37. If you’re thinking of someone, 9/10 times they are thinking of you too OR they could use a call of love and comfort. Pick up the phone and call them.

38. Some people learn through experience. I am that person. It nearly killed me. But it made me stronger than I ever thought possible, and for me, that’s what I needed.

39. Laughter is the best medicine.

40. Whether you believe it or not, God is always waiting to talk to us. He is always there. Always loving. Always ready to give. Be quiet enough to listen.

The little business in Waldoboro, Maine that served as my very first job in life, has been mailing custom, handmade balsam fir wreaths to your door since 1992. They have no marketing spend, no Instagram, no media, and a minimalist website with a singular e-mail and phone number on it. For kicks, I pulled out my phone, and called the number the other day. Lo and behold, Dave picked up, the owner. Dave bought the business from the founder in 1995, and has been running this quiet brand for 30 years.

I told him my story and we had a lovely conversation. Between 1994-1998 or so, at the young, ripe age of 9-12, I sold Wreaths of Maine door to door in my neighborhood. I made $3.50 commission for selling the basic wreath, and $5.50 commission for selling the fancier ones. Every January, I received a check - made out to Emily Jansen - for roughly $300-500 dollars. At that age, I felt rich. I was proud to represent Wreaths of Maine, and even more proud every time I ran home at day’s end having sold Christmas wreaths to my Mom’s neighborhood friends, my Grandmother, and others.

The wreaths were beautiful. You could smell the incredible balsam fir fragrance when opening the box, and every time the UPS driver drove by our house, I would run out to see if he was bringing me wreath shipments so that I could happily deliver them to the buyer’s doors. Sometimes, they shipped directly to my clients’ homes. My Oma (Dutch Grandma) always bought the wreath with a bright red ribbon and pine cones and my Grandma always bought the wreath with baby’s breath and blueberries.

I reflected with Dave on the impact this first experience had on my life and career. I didn’t know then that I was a salesperson at heart, and the rush of making a commission filled me with a great sense of satisfaction and pride. It was brand ambassadorship at its simplest. I was just a young student pitching a simple product - a holiday wreath. To some, an extravagance or unnecessary fanfare. But, back in 1995, there was no Whole Foods or Home Depot trees and wreaths. There were the Maryland orchards, the lawn and garden centers, the Christmas tree farms outside of town. There wasn’t an easy, quick-fix. People made their own wreaths, or bought mine :) And it made me realize what my core selling points really were:

1. I was selling a differentiated product that was only available from Maine.

2. The price point was worth it because it lasted for up to 4 weeks through January.

3. Buyers were supporting a local family business, not a commercial mainstream.

4. They were supporting my future ($5.50 was a lot back then!)

5. Keeping up with the Jones’ - I convinced people to buy the wreath so that their holiday door looked as nice as their next door neighbors.

I learned the art of persuasion. I learned to know my customer uniquely. I learned to build a small book of business, returning to the regulars the next year. And I learned the power of the referral and word-of-mouth marketing. It was simple, and I didn’t even know what I was learning at the time.

These skills have carried over the years into my business today. Know your product, know your customer, know your market, know value-pricing, and know the power of selling something you believe in. When I told Dave my story, he was surprised at how deeply my core memories were set, and how much I remembered about the little paper forms I had to mail back to Maine to submit my customers’ orders. I told him how Wreaths of Maine impacted my life and career more than I ever knew, and I could sense his delight on the other side of the phone line. A little homeschooler from Maryland remembered Wreaths of Maine, and somehow was still in their CRM.

Today, 95% of their sales come from brand ambassadors who sell on their behalf. Word-of-mouth referrals have carried them over the years, and when I asked Dave if I could support him with my marketing and brand services, he politely declined. It wasn’t that he didn’t see the need, but he was resolute on their desire to keep this little business small and simple. They didn’t want to further scale or become more modern - they just wanted to keep their system in place. A simple system, albeit antiquated, but one that worked for them. I respected his decision and told him I would simply buy a wreath for myself and my parents instead this Christmas.

Sometimes, in marketing, we think brand is something so tactical and tangible that we have to perfectly articulate it, craft it, sell it, position it, segment it. But in reality, a brand is something we first and foremost experience. It is something that we smell, taste, touch, hear, and feel. It contains sentiments like nostalgia and Christmas. It is difficult to measure, easy to remember, and perhaps like Wreaths of Maine, quietly marketed.

But one thing is certain: no matter where AI and technology take us, people are the greatest ambassadors for brands. I firmly believe this, and regardless of what sector or vertical you’re in, people selling through personal advocacy and connection, expressing simple human delights and needs in simple terms, is what makes a great business. Experiences like Wreaths of Maine isn’t so much about the wreath itself. It’s about the feeling it evokes when you see it and smell it as you walk through someone’s front door at Christmastime. It was the window into my Grandmother’s home, unlocking and unleashing eggs benedict, orange juice in fancy glasses, stocking stuffers, and lots of cookies in tins on Christmas morning.

How can your brand re-connect with people this holiday season at the core level of brand experience? Imagine your product or service not at center stage, but as part of a holistic experience and setting and backdrop that glues your brand into a happy moment or recurring memory for your customers and clients. How can people spread the word, sell the brand promise, pass on how great you are and why your company or brand matter?

In honor of ADHD Awareness Month this October, I am excited to share I’ve decided to write another book. My first captured the essence of what it looks like to keep dreaming despite disappointments; this book is still for the dreamers, but for those with a dopamine deficit navigating ADHD in life, love and work.

Here’s my story.

In April, I did what I had been dreading: I went to see an ADHD specialist after years of putting it off. We sat down, she conducted a two-hour interview intake session, and asked me a series of curious questions, all posed in a kind, loving way. After years of struggling with ADHD-like symptoms, I knew there was a huge chance I had it, but the busyness of life, unemployment in 2022 and other financial pressures like knee surgeries took precedent. I knew it was time.

I’ll never forget her prompt: ‘Imagine standing in front of the Mona Lisa, and for the first time in your life, you can truly see it and absorb it without 27 TV’s on in your brain distracting you from the main thing.’

My jaw dropped. I didn’t realize I had been feeling that way for years, but sub-consciously, I knew my brain was…well, different. There were too many signs. Too many circumstances that all added up. I wanted help, but I was afraid to try medicine, and I definitely didn’t want to be told, here’s some Adderol, good luck.

She sent me home, without a prescription (brownie points, in my opinion). She asked me to do some research on two different medications, and follow up in two weeks. I arrived back, pro’s and con’s in hand, and we had another conversation. It wasn’t a diagnosis. It was a curious conversation. I agreed to try a non-stimulant, slow release at a low dose, and see what happened.

In the first two weeks, I was cautiously optimistic. I took the medication, feeling nauseated at first, but hopeful and curious. I ate high-protein breakfasts. I observed my behavior and general productivity and focus in conversations. What unfolded:

• I suddenly felt more in control of my workflow and ability to conquer tasks. I was never a procrastinator, but I often struggled with delaying completing the big task of the week, filling my time with all the little tasks. I approached a huge project in May and conquered it with ease, joy, and a sense of confidence.

• I stopped reacting to people, conversations, texts, and offenses that no longer seemed to matter as intensely. Previously, I would have added my Sagittarius fire to the mix and debated back, speaking my mind and generally adding to the tension. Suddenly, I found myself practicing ‘benevolent detachment,’ a non-emotional response to situations with either a quick note back or no reply. I found myself HANGING OUT IN THE PAUSE. I had never been there before. It felt wild. I felt like my brain + body were able to OBSERVE.

• My high-high and low-low’s stopped. I was able to enter into joy and be generally emotive in a good way, but I wasn’t dipping into sadness or elevating anymore into intense feelings that always felt larger than life. I didn’t cry as easily or often. I was able to actually observe my emotion before caving into it. It was detached from my own self. It was just there, but not a part of me.

• I was able to listen, ask questions and stay focused in conversations. If you know me, you know I jump and skip around in conversations, often completely off-topic and it wasn’t as tricky to just evoke, and ask others’ questions. I stopped interrupting so much. I didn’t feel myself blurting things out.

• Lastly, my family and boyfriend noticed the shift. Need I say more?

Which brings me to today. Fast-forward 6 months, and I can’t really explain the shift. My brain literally feels like it is on a train track, correctly aligned, for the first time in my life. I cried, grieving over the amount of years and time spent without support. I am not living in the past, but certainly have reflected on my previous jobs, professional relationships, personal relationships, and life circumstances. Would X, Y or Z never have happened had I been on ADHD meds that whole time?

I’ll never know. But what I do know is that after 6+ months of listening to podcasts, reading literature, talking to other women who have struggled with this and also been diagnosed later in life, I know one thing is certain: there are so many women out there still not optimizing and functioning at 100% because they remain undiagnosed. Of the women in the U.S. who have ADHD, 50-75% remain undiagnosed. Somewhere between 350,000 and 525,000 U.S. women in their 30s likely have ADHD but remain undiagnosed.

I am not advocating for one-size-fits-all. Many people have benefitted tremendously from lion’s mane, holistic approaches, mushroom coffee, other supplements, less sugar, etc. But, I personally needed that last “umphhh.”

It’s like Diabetes of the Brain. It’s a dopamine deficit. Your brain literally lacks the dopamine it needs, and without support, your brain and body will seek out dopamine hits. It’s probably why I’ve enjoyed dynamic triathlons all these years. It’s probably why I had to play classical piano while I studied math in college. It’s probably why I’ve been known as the Irish exit-er of parties: I get overwhelmed socially, and leave. It’s probably why people have described me as intense.

So, here we are. It’s October - ADHD Awareness Month. And I am openly sharing (without shame or fear) that I have it. I’ve identified the issue. And I’ve sought help. And now I join a crew of women who feel, bottom line, that they are “too much.”

Many women believe they are not enough. Some believe they are too much. These women are the dramatic dreamers, the hill-climbers, the radicals, the movers and shakers. They scale businesses, multi-task, have large networks, run marathons, and come across as intense to those they encounter. They are the women who don’t take no for an answer. And they are the women who defy odds and make history. These women say too much, ask too much, strive too much, dare too much, have feelings that are too much, and rock the boat … too much.

As these women navigate business, family, culture and society, it becomes increasingly the case that many of them discover later in their lives as seasoned, mature women that they are ADHD, an unwelcome label that is difficult to hold as title in a world that expects composure, calm, precision and the status quo. They are the women men can’t figure out, women can’t figure out and especially bosses can’t figure out. They’re like fire — and people don’t want to be burned by them.

Then there is the layer of faith. Women who love God, and often feel lost in a world where the practice of faith requires a balance between logic, wisdom, and emotions. We are the ones harnessing their emotions carefully and wisely, but often feeling like we give way to our whimsical feelings. How do these women harness and catalyze their emotions for eternal, productive good? How do we take our passions, dreams, longings, hopes and aspirations and focus them into a harmonized vision that is centered on truth and wisdom?

This new book isn’t so much about the science behind ADHD. It’s about the daily life experiences surrounding ADHD that women constantly navigate, and are learning (even in later ages) to move through with knowledge, poise and grace. The moments, experiences and stories that come with shame and sadness can be transformed through spirit, strength, support, and sacrifice. The superpower that is a double edged sword — the both/and, and the maturity of learning how to recognize a life lived both in emotional spirit and in logical truth.

Especially in professional settings, women who are intense, emotional, visionary, or impulsive often wrestle with guilt and shame for not fitting the mold of composure, calm, and control. But what if the problem isn’t spiritual failure—it’s undiagnosed ADHD and a lack of a scientific framework?

Too Much is not going to be a clinical manual, but a transformational guidebook for women navigating the realities of life with ADHD. This book reframes common struggles—impulsivity, reactivity, emotional depth, and executive dysfunction—not as character flaws, but as neurological patterns with both challenges and strengths. It will offer readers life + spiritual tools and practical wisdom to rewire their self-perception, relationships, and daily lives.

From romantic relationships and conflict resolution, to career focus and money management, Too Much brings compassionate clarity to the chaos. Through real stories, scriptural truths, and science-backed frameworks, this book helps women connect the dots between their symptoms and their struggles—then walks them toward healing, purpose, and community.

This book is also about spiritual integration. It’s about learning to listen for the voice of God in a mind that often feels like a whirlwind, about pairing medical help with prayer, and embracing both structure and surrender. It is for women ready to own their story, build resilience, and live with holy confidence that they are not broken—they are brilliantly wired.

While I’d love a publishing advance from a fantastic publishing house, and I would still welcome that, what I realized that what I really want is to offer bite-sized pieces to women with ADHD one chapter at a time. This substack will offer that. It’s ironic isn’t it? Women with ADHD often cannot focus and sit down and read an entire book in a setting. Well, neither can I write an entire book in a short period, lol. So, I am disrupting the framework. I plan to produce, write, and offer my new book, chapter by chapter, RIGHT HERE. By the people, for the people.

To all my beloved friends with ADHD, I’m here, and you’re not too much.

️ $500,000 in gross revenue since 2022

️

Uncle Sam obviously takes a massive chunk and I am so happy to also pay my subcontractors and consulting colleagues. But the reality is, we crossed it, and it feels amazing!

There are times when you wonder if you’re going to sink. I’ll never forget 2022. Filing for unemployment. Seeing less than $500 in my checking accounting after my severance ran out, while also going through 3x runner ups, a car accident, knee surgery, and heartbreak over that first year.

Looking back, I see now that the unraveling was all a part of the plan. It wasn’t my plan. But it needed to happen so that I could rebuild with a solid foundation, co-creating with God, knowing that I was made to stretch and grow.

Once I went all in, the past three years became more instructive than any graduate program. I have learned how to be a CEO: leadership, contracts, financials, biz dev, marcomms, brand, and more. I have learned how personal brand matters more than representing any corporate entity, because what matters most is who speaks well of you in rooms you’re NOT in. That, my friend, IS your brand.

Women in small business are undeniably some of the most generous, resilient, abundant-minded women. I have been amazed at the depth of soul, character and courage that so many have demonstrated to me. It’s easy to be grateful, because I have served — and been mentored by — women who refuse to give up, and always strive for excellence.

What do you want? Who do you want to be? What is your purpose? What is your dream. Career is complicated and yet so simple. Seasons can feel long, but life is short. This video is a call for and celebration of creativity, courage, and curiosity. Go do what you love.

Choose curiosity. Choose bravery. Choose trailblazing. Choose to go higher. And choose faith in what you don’t yet see. Because on the other side is freedom. Freedom to give generously, to EXPECT abundance.

Freedom to keep dreaming.

Ps 126:5

We were meeting to discuss a mutual friend’s conference, the Newport Global Summit. By the end of the call, one thing stood out to me, and one thing alone: this incredible woman who had trailblazed businesses and bought the old Belcourt Mansion in Newport, the former home of Alva Belmont who started the Suffrage Movement, and renovated it into a beautiful space, was passionate about legacy.

I didn’t know how or when, but I knew I wanted to partner with her. It wasn’t about the mansion, and the dreamy legend of being connected to Alva (a woman who basically started women-supporting-women). It was about her mutual persistence, vision, and dreaming spirit. Her tenacity which matched Alva’s. The courage to believe the unknown and to create something that simply didn’t exist.

Fast-forward months, and I found myself co-hosting a women’s reception at Belcourt for 50+. With the generous support of UBS, Newport Global Summit, and Carolyn, we had officially convened a proper program at Belcourt in honor of Alva’s legacy.

Carolyn spoke of persistence and trail-blazing. And perhaps that’s what legacy really is. The courage to go and create what no one else has before. Whether it’s a jewelry line or a book or a program or a space…legacy goes forward bravely and sees what might possible with a penny and faith.

As female business owners, many of us have these ideas and when step out and ask for help, it’s amazing what can happen. When women truly support each other, without competition, scarcity, or fear, magic happens. And that’s all I have ever wanted. To surround myself by women who are ahead of me, and who can help coach me and catch my vision and help bring it to life. Because there’s no point in doing it alone. It’s not only boring, it’s unreasonable and silly. And there I stood, offering a few remarks next to two women, Carolyn and Kitty, who have built incredible brands and legacies through their own visions. All I could do was thank the heavens in that moment.

The next day, Carolyn and I had a chat in our sweats, with a glass of wine. We talked about tenacity that never takes no for an answer. I sat in awe. I had met a match, and it occurred to me, Carolyn isn’t successful because everything fell in line easily; she’s successful because when she heard no, she came back, and said, let’s try a different angle. She believed in possibility and the power of believing.

Big things are coming. For Belcourt and women who believe. And within those halls, Alva’s voice rings loud and clear. “I blaze the trail for the rest to walk in.”

Trailblazers often have to walk forward alone. They are the ultimate early adapters. They go ahead where no one has been before. But, more than anything, they believe in legacy. The enduring witness and testimony and light that lingers for years to come.

I am so thankful. The women have walked before me, Alva and Carolyn and so many others, aren’t looking down at me. They are shouting for me up ahead. I’m coming.

As I prepare to freeze my eggs in a few weeks, that phrase has rung loudly in my ears. Motherhood, after all, is a unique calling, a vocation…a dream for many, including myself. And like many women around me, in their late 30’s and early 40’s, we often feel an invisible clock ticking as we hold our breath, hoping that we won’t lose our chance. The question, to freeze or not to freeze, becomes almost like someone who doesn’t stop knocking at your door selling you something. One day, you answer the door. And you can no longer say maybe. You have to say a strong, resounding ‘yes’ or ‘no.’

I have always known deep down that I was going to be a mother. Over the years, motherhood has been a delightful, diverse experience for me. I have mothered high-school girls in Kenya (17 surrogate high-school daughters in my boarding school dorm that I served at.) I have a beautiful god-daughter that I deeply love and engage with. I have spent a lot of time around my close friends’ kiddos, establishing sweet relationships with their daughters. And I have mothered younger women off and on through mentoring, in Kenya and Korea and in the states. I have mothered Sadie, my dog, whom I love deeply.

In some ways, I feel that I have birthed two important things into the world already. My book and my business. Pregnant with these dreams, I blazed a trail to create and grow and nurture becoming an author and also establishing my brand agency. Dreams, after all, become pregnant within us, and one day, they are birthed into the world. We smile with wonder at the thought of creating alongside our Creator.

Now, I embark on this strange, but confident decision: to freeze as many eggs as I can. I am grateful for the chance to do it - physically, financially, and circumstantially. I did a lot of research, and finally came to the point where I felt confident and peaceful about my decision. (Let it be known I have thoughts about healthcare in America and why it needs to be so expensive for women, especially those of us who are self-employed, but that’s a different post.) I know that I know that I know that I want this. I want the chance to have a baby someday, with a man who wants to co-create a child with me, and I don’t want to miss my chance for this. I don’t want to wake up in a few years and wonder “what if…”?

So, here we are. I have taken more supplements than ever before in my life. I pray in fertility acupuncture. Some days, I smile. Some days, tears stream down my cheeks imaging my future daughter. A girl I have already named in my heart. A girl I know I want to raise and invest in and create legacy through. My grandmothers’ voices echo in the halls of my life. I cannot imagine NOT carrying forward their legacy and investment in my life. My own Mother means the world to me. This too, I long for.

Legacy comes in so many forms. I think, deep down, we as women all long for legacy. A sense of the baton pass into the next generation. A face looking back at us with perhaps our nose or our smile or our personality. A smile and giggle that makes us smile back at the thought of childhood, and the memories we carry into adulthood. We pursue this sense of legacy in a variety of ways - in our careers, through motherhood, adoption, IVF, through art and noble deeds and philanthropy, and so much more. We want to pass on so much more than a secret recipe or a Christmas tradition or our rich heritage of faith or even a special piece of jewelry from our Grandmothers.

We want to pass on the abiding qualities that have become ours, through thick and thin. Resilience, courage, prayer, faith, kindness, love, trail-blazing, victory, triumphs, creativity, life lessons, giving and generosity, forgiveness, and freedom. Freedom of people-pleasing, freedom in grace, freedom in discovery and seeing the world. Freedom from fear, freedom to choose a path, freedom to embark on a discovery. Freedom to support other women, freedom to draw near to God through nature. Freedom to find that beyond comparison, competition, careers, cash, and college, there is creativity. Creativity to co-create with God in so many incredible ways.

And maybe that’s what I really long for. Co-creating something beautiful with God. Hopefully a daughter someday, through motherhood, but also creating a legacy that will last for generations to come.

So, beyond the needles, shots, hormones, doctor’s appointments and thousands of dollars I’m about to spend to freeze my eggs, there is a story ahead. A hope. A vision. And I’m here for it. Not because I would have ever thought this would be my path or journey. But because I know deep down, I was made for more.

To all the women reading this - to those who are already mothers, to those who long to be a mother, to those expecting children, to those who are barren, to those who are grieving miscarriages, to those fostering children, to those who mother doggo’s, to those who mentor and guide youth: you are my heroes. You are my heartbeat.

Because across the miles and circumstances and life stages and generations, ‘there are millions of mothers that live inside our chest,’ and I can only hope we celebrate and applaud each other every single day. For mothering humanity, nature, business, community. For mothering the next generation. For mothering eternity’s halls.

“I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that He is able to guard until that day what has been entrusted to me.” (2 Timothy)

I suppose after all these years that is what has kept me writing. It has also been the very thing that has kept me from writing.

If I write the truest sentence I know, it begs the question, is it really truth, or is what I’m saying only my truth or God’s truth or perhaps a bit of your truth and mine?

How do we know it is true? How do I validate what I’m saying, feeling, thinking, believing, hoping? Furthermore, in a world where I now read sentences mixed with ChaptGPT and AI, how do I believe what I’m seeing anymore? The beauty of reading sentences from others is that it bears the soul of the singular person who is writing and penning their words. Not a technology. Not a data set. Just you.

In 2009, I started a Wordpress blog from Africa. I lived in Kenya for a year and found great comfort in drinking black tea grown down the road on the tea farm like Isak Dinesan, and sitting at my desk and writing daily. It was a rhythm of rest. It was a ritual. It was a practice of curiosity. Over the years, life got busy and my writing became more technical as I entered the world of grant-writing, product technology, and brand messaging for others. I stopped blogging, because after the rounds of Wordpress and Medium, there was Instagram and TikTok and short, succinct LinkedIn posts that I was supposed to abide by. (Don’t forget the hashtags).

Over time, I finished my book in 2022 and published it, and it was satisfying to put out a piece into the world that felt whole. 15 years later, I suppose I am returning to long-form blogging – now on Substack. Not because I expect everyone to read it. But, if you know me, you know I am not a woman of few words, and I suppose there is a part of me still obsessed with writing the most true, beautiful sentence I can.

Even if it is about my dog or coffee or the light pouring into my living room. A true sentence can be brisk and beautiful without being brim with extensive knowledge. My creative side has suffered. I have formed writer’s block. And, as I look at the last few days, busy with building my clients’ brands, I find myself drawn to blank pages and the blinking cursor – waiting for me, inviting me, drawing me…to simply write again.

I have some ideas of books and stories. I’d like to write a children’s book series called Charlie the Camel. Charlie goes to the farm, goes to the rodeo, goes to Africa, goes scuba-diving, goes cycling, etc. I’m also exploring co-authoring a book on ADHD late-diagnoses in women. But mostly, I just want to write about life again. The mundane. The simple moments that take your breath away. The ordinary days that make up the bulk of life. The ways the ordinary becomes extraordinary. The ways I am learning to see what is true in the midst of what feels fake at times. What lies beyond social media and conditioned news and things that feel too overwhelming to handle/process.

Growing pains abound. Every day, we are learning to stretch into the unknown – AI, self-driving cars in Austin, shifting markets and economies, and of course, culture. Writing the truest sentences we know feels like pushing a boulder up Mt. Kili., hoping our message, truth, and story breaks through the noise and resonates in the souls of men. We write texts to each other, hoping to communicate clearly what we wish to say. Misunderstandings abound, or our truth isn’t felt or appreciated by others, and then we falter, silencing ourselves because it’s sometimes easier to grow quiet than to share what we really believe. And in a world where we are supposed to be Switzerland always - I wonder, what will happen to truth? What will happen to respecting each other’s point of views, and perspectives, and feelings, and experiences?

Write the truest sentence you know today. Write your purpose statement. Your core belief. Then step back. In fact, that is your brand identity! And from that truth, your brand’s core values and beliefs grow. Try it this week and see what magic happens.