{ Choose your spot at the World Community for Contemplative Prayer in France }

Lately I keep thinking about building a stronger prayer life on this notion of fixed and free prayer, which could truly encompass the whole day, if I were more focused. This was often taught by Bishop Kallistos, who prayed this way in his own life.

You can cling to the Jesus Prayer while you are being still before a candle. This is the fixed use.

You can cling to the Jesus Prayer while you are actively moving or resting. This is the free use.

The Jesus Prayer is a way to BE with God in your heart, while keeping God in your thoughts, as the little Pilgrim discovers in my book, The Little Way of a Pilgrim.1

“Lord Jesus Christ have mercy on us.”

This is how Bishop Kallistos taught us to say the Jesus Prayer.

He was a guardian of these words … in so many of his writings and video teachings, and of so many Hesychasts who spanned the centuries, as he translated and edited the Philokalia.

When I flew to England to sit with Bishop Kallistos at the pan-Orthodox Fellowship of Saint John the Baptist, it was a rare and wonderful time of focusing on contemplative prayer. ‘Lift Up Your Heart’ was the title of the retreat, and it changed my life trajectory.

It’s not easy to find Orthodox contemplative prayer retreats, that go beyond telling you to say the Jesus Prayer, to showing you how, and giving you time to practice together.

The Monastery of Saint John the Baptist, in Essex, England, is a rare exception. There, laypeople join the monastic men and women of the monastery in 2 hour sessions of pure Jesus Prayer. Each time I go, I fall in love again with this group practice.

If you go, be sure to stay on during the week, as the Jesus Prayer services generaly don’t happen during the weekends.

And if you’re lucky, and if you’re willing to wait around for half a day, you may get to be with and speak to Archimandrite Zacharias, spiritual son of Saint Sophrony, who was the spiritual son of Saint Silouan.

Kallistos sums up the simplicity of this holy writ in his slim volume, The Power of the Name:

No specialized knowledge or training is required before commencing the Jesus Prayer. To the beginner it is sufficient to say: Simply begin. ‘In order to walk one must take a first step; in order to swim one must throw oneself into the water. It is the same with the Invocation of the Name. begin to pronounce it with adoration and love. Cling to it. Repeat it. Do not think that you are invoking the Name; think only of Jesus himself. Say his Name slowly, softly and quietly.2

And when I think of Jesus himself, it leads me straight to the Holy Spirit of God, our everyday Comforter who Jesus left with us to dwell in us … to pray in us … to nourish our soul.

Many teachers throughout the centuries who love stillness and BEING with God, speak of the ‘Sacrament of the Present Moment’. Being with God in the ‘here and now’.

So the Jesus prayer concentrates us into the here and now, making us single-centred, one-pointed, drawing us from a multiplicity of thoughts to union with the one Christ … gather together your scattered intellect – gather it together from the plurality of discursive thinking into the simplicity of love. 3

Saint Symeon the New Theologian gives us clear instructions in the Philokalia. He says,

Sit down in a quiet cell, in a corner by yourself, and do what I tell you. Close the door, and withdraw your intellect from everything worthless and transient. Rest your beard on your chest, and focus your physical gaze, together with the whole of your intellect, upon the centre of your belly or your navel. Restrain the drawing-in of breath through your nostrils, so as not to breathe easily, and search inside yourself with your intellect so as to find the place of the heart, where all the powers of the soul reside. To start with you will find there darkness and an impenetrable density. Later, when you persist and practise this task day and night, you will find, as though miraculously an unceasing joy … The rest you will learn for yourself, with God’s help, by keeping guard over your intellect and by retaining Jesus in your heart.4

The Philokalia advises us to:

1. Sit quietly

2. Withdraw your intellect

3. Focus your gaze below your chest

4. Restrain your breathing

5. Search inside yourself to find your heart

6. practice

7. experience joy!

Such a simple way to connect to the God of the universe. It doesn’t cost anything, no one needs to know when you’re saying the Jesus Prayer, it’s like a secret language between you and the Holy Trinity. A blessed conversation in stillness.

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Q: What time of the day does stillness appeal to you most?

Spark: Extend your time of contemplative prayer on one day of the week.

Resources:

{ Hermitage of St. Gregory of Sinai, visited 3 years ago by Elizabeth Davis @paideaclassics }

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The Active Energy of Prayer

My friend, Elizabeth, makes a pilgrimage to Sinai often. She recently posted this photo on Instagram, of Saint Gregory’s hermitage with his twisted almond tree.

Amazing to see the very place where he practiced hesychasm, and at the same time, to read his important words on prayer from the Philokalia, while sitting in my living room.

He encourages us, his spiritual children over time and space, saying:

Let our aim be to make the energy of prayer alone active in our hearts, for it brings warmth and joy to the intellect, and sets the heart alight with an ineffable love for God and man. It is on account of this that humility and contrition flow richly from prayer. For prayer in beginners is the unceasing noetic activity of the Holy Spirit. To start with it rises like a fire of joy from the heart; in the end it is like light made fragrant by divine energy.1

Warmth to the intellect!

A fire of joy!

Light made fragrant by divine energy!

What’s not to love about the Prayer of the Heart?

Hesychasm Wins

Saint Gregory continues to teach us of the help we can receive from the Holy Spirit. He and Saint Gregory Palamas were co-laborers in the 14th century Hesychast Controversies. Standing up for the mystical Prayer of the Heart in a monastic environment that largely did not value Hesychasm, the Holy Spirit worked through these two, and prevailed in the Fifth Council of Constantinople (actually seven councils rolled into one, from 1341-1368). The Council of Crete recently reaffirmed this ‘Fifth Council’ in 2016.

So strange, to consider such opposition to praying in stillness, especially on Mount Athos, the Byzantine homeland for monks, ascetics and hermits.

Our Mystical Helper

Saint Gregory of Sinai zones in on the vital connection between the Jesus Prayer and the Holy Spirit, whom Christ left with us as our helper in the mystical, interior work we are called to.

For no one on his own account and without the help of the Spirit can mystically invoke the Lord Jesus, for this can be done with purity and in its fullness only with the help of the Holy Spirit … some fathers teach that the prayer should be said aloud; others, that it should be said silently with the intellect. On the basis of my personal experience I recommend both ways.2

Lately I have been praying for help from the wordless action of the Holy Spirit in me (Romans 8:26). ‘Holy Spirit, pray in me.’ It helps to prepare my mind and heart for the stillness of hesychast prayer. And I have found that words of preparation to ourselves are often helpful as we attempt to focus.

Check your intention

Saint Gregory can also be pragmatic, as he digs down past our appearances, into our intentions. He reminds us,

Continually take careful note of your inner intention: watch carefully which way it inclines, and discover whether it is for God and for the sake of goodness itself and the benefit of your soul that you practise stillness or psalmodize or read or pray or cultivate some virtue. Otherwise you may unknowingly be ensnared and prove to be an ascetic in outward appearance alone while in your manner of life and inner intention you are wanting to impress men, and not to conform to God.3

Saint Gregory of Sinai can be strict, and pierce the outer appearance of things with the soul’s intentions. He spent his life in the pursuit of inner stillness and pure prayer, so he knows first hand the pitfalls and joys of finding his own heart within the heart of God.

For an illuminating voyage alongside Saint Gregory, read the fascinating historical novel, Sinaiticus of Sinai, written by Father Gregory Farman, co-organizer of the Orthodox Arts Festival in Dallas, Texas. I have participated in that festival in a variety of ways, alongside Elizabeth Davis (her photo above), and Martin Shaw.

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Q: How do you experience the Prayer of the Heart/Jesus Prayer?

Spark: We can all check ourselves, to make sure we are praying in our ‘secret room’, not in outward appearance alone.

Resources:

{ always a chance to pray the Jesus Prayer in the ‘free’ manner along the garden path }

Prayer in Motion!

Do you like to share God’s love with growing things?

One way to do this is to pray while you plant a seed, water the flowers or feed the dog. Every action you take during the day can be a chance to share God’s love with the whole world, while practicing prayer throughout your daily chores.

Many holy Mothers and Fathers speak often of remembering God throughout your daily activities. Whether you like to pray the Jesus Prayer, remember Mystery in your own way, or simply say ‘Thank you’ as you trod this fascinating earth.

Each morning, while I’m dragging the hose around our yard, I say the Jesus Prayer while offering vital, God-given water to our string of 20 young lavender plants. Gathering our chicken eggs can be another opportunity to pray, or throwing the ball for our dog, Ruby.

Prayer in motion!

Stillness and Action

Bishop Kallistos spoke often of the ‘Fixed and Free’ ways of saying the Jesus Prayer.

The ‘Fixed’ way is standing before your lighted candle at your prayer stand, perhaps with an icon, sprig of nature, or holy object that bends your heart toward God.

The ‘Free’ way of saying the Jesus Prayer is when you’re on the go. Circling the garden, dead-heading the hanging basket, petting the cat…

When I listened to him speak about prayer in an English manor house some years ago, Kallistos explained it like this:

“There are two ways of saying the Jesus Prayer, which we may term ‘fixed’ and ‘free’. The fixed way is to make the Jesus Prayer part of our specific prayer time, part of the time that we set aside, morning and evening, to pray, when we are trying to pray and not to do anything else. Side by side with that, there is the free use of the Jesus Prayer, when we say the Jesus Prayer once or many times in all the passing moments of the day that might otherwise be wasted. For example, we can say the Jesus Prayer first thing as we wake up in the morning, or last thing as we drop off to sleep at night. We can say the Jesus Prayer once or many times as we are walking from place to place.”1

When we offer the elements of each day to God, we grow closer to Him in our hearts, through the work of our hands.

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Q: What natural element would you like to bring into your prayer life?

Spark: When you offer water to living things, remember John 7:37-39: "If anyone thirsts, let him come to me and drink. Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, 'Out of his heart will flow rivers of living water.'“

Resources:

{ Cycling the Rails to Trails bike path with Ron, minutes before the crash }

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Tangled

It happened in a split second.

First, I was happily peddling down the bike trail, veering a little too close to my husband’s handlebars — the next moment I was in an ambulance, sirens blasting down the freeway.

After our handlebars locked, we went down hard. Ron untangled himself then bent over to help me up. Except I wasn’t there. My body was there — torso twisted in an unusual way, arms and legs deeply scraped up, hands clenched tightly. My eyes were rolled back, vacant. Kind of freaked him out.

First time I’ve ever experienced a concussion or broken bone. Ironically, it’s also the first time a week on my calendar has been clear for the past, oh, 30 years or so. Coincidence??

God and I both know that I need to slow down. Apparently, it was on one of our ‘To-Do Lists’ to allow that to happen this week. He also seemed to be happy to begin knitting my skin and bones back together again.

Time to Pray

Contemplative prayer is the perfect thing to practice after you get a concussion … no visual, no audio, no intellectual input. Straight to the heart.

In the fog, it’s a little easier to focus on the Jesus Prayer. Distractions don’t seem to come as fast and furious as with a clear mind. I wonder if this stripping away of compelling thoughts will be an added feature of praying in old age. If so … bonus!

Turning back ... Perfect Metaphor

I don’t use the word ‘Perfect’ lightly. But I just realized that the constant ‘turning back’ to stillness in contemplative prayer teaches us this important life lesson.

Returning to contemplative prayer over and over again is both a metaphor and actual practice for our minute-by-minute return to God in our lives. A choice that becomes more natural the more you do it. Prayer is like a microcosm, a distilled sample, of rooting our whole lives in God.

Take Refuge

Prayer teaches us how to BE with God. The Philokalia explains,

St. Basil the Great says, ‘Good prayer is that which brings about a distinct sense of God in the soul. This is God dwelling within us, when through our mindfulness of Him He is rooted in us and when the continuity of such mindfulness is not interrupted by worldly concerns, nor is the intellect disturbed by unexpected passions, and when by shunning all things in our love for God we take refuge in Him.1

Through our mindfulness of God, we can give thanks in all things. In this way, we take refuge in the God who dwells within us. We can sense God in our soul.

Whether going through our normal, busy week or experiencing an unexpected slow-down in our days, we can continue to grow our relationship to the God who knit us together in the first place.

As the Desert Fathers say, “Go sit in your Cell and your Cell will teach you everything.” Sometimes it helps to be wearing gauze bandages and an arm sling.

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Q: Where do you go to ‘sit in your cell’?

Spark: Set aside time for extra contemplative prayer this week (no crash required!)

Resources:

{ Charles on the rough streets of Portland }

Living on the Streets

Charles was a bright light within the homeless scene in Portland, Oregon. For years he faithfully greeted cars driving by with a cardboard sign saying, ‘Just asking for Smiles’. He had traveled internationally, and enjoyed creative cooking, riding bikes, a good cigar, and fishing.

Charles set up camp outside our stationery store each evening for years, and left the space tidy each morning around 6 am. Sometimes, when we had difficult stragglers in the store who were filling their pockets without plans to pay for the goods, or simply wouldn’t leave when the store closed, Charles would come help us to diffuse the situation and usher them out.

When Charles left to serve another 5-year prison term, we kept in touch. We learned some protocol about how to visit people behind those big, clanging prison doors. How to send letters on plain (non-decorative) paper, mail books from online sources only, and how to prop up their commissary accounts through Jpay for snacks, toiletries, and stationery. Charles wrote beautiful letters to us on that prison stationery, about his daily struggles, the joy of working in the kitchen, and concern for our well being and the well being of our business.

He maintained a low profile there, and when he was released, it was a joy to meet him at the bus stop, hear some stories over lunch, and help carry his big plastic bags of personal belongings to the local shelter. He went back to his daily routine on the same street corner as before, to ask for smiles. Ironically, this also gained him a nice roll of dollars for his pocket.

Prison Ministries

Last Sunday, a group of us whose patron saint is Anna worked together to serve the fellowship meal after church. The donations went to support Orthodox Christian Prison Ministries. I have had a latent interest in working with this group, to share the peace that comes with contemplative prayer at a local correctional facility. Also, I know my life is busier than it should be, and I’m constantly trying to figure out ways to simplify. We’ll see which way the Spirit may nudge.

Listening to our heart

People who cross our paths are sent to us by the Spirit of God. We don’t have to look too far. The practice of contemplative prayer helps us listen. We can’t solve all of the difficult situations in the world, but we can listen to the voice of God within our hearts for our own direction.

Bishop Kallistos begins his powerful little book this way:

The hesychast, the person who has attained hesychia, inner stillness or silence, is par excellence the one who listens. He listens to the voice of prayer in his own heart, and he understands that this voice is not his own but that of Another speaking within him.1

While many of us practice hesychia in hopes of one day attaining the prayer of the heart, we can still catch glimpses of the ‘Other’ speaking within us, in stillness. This practice is a way of learning to listen to our heart. It opens a way to move through the world, in some ways independent of our rational, conscious mind, which can be so bossy at times!

Receiving Grace through prayer

Last Sunday our deacon gave a homily on praying for our neighbor from the Jesus Prayer: Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on us. Deacon shared his own experience, and the words of Saint Silouan with us,

He who loves the Lord is ever mindful of Him, and the thought of the Lord begets prayer. For the grace of the Holy Spirit comes through prayer.

When the Lord would have mercy on a person, here’s how He does it: He inspires others with the desire to pray for him. And He helps them in their prayer. When we pray for others, it is the Lord working in us, so He can work in them.

The beginning of this is to pray for others. When we pray for others, we glorify God. When we pray for others we fulfill the commandment to love our neighbors as ourselves, praying for others as we would pray for ourselves.

Constantly we are running into people. And we see them in their face and we see their suffering and we see their joys, and so we have an immediate impetus, an immediate reminder, to pray. To pray for them, to pray for us, to pray for the world. And in this way we can achieve our goal, to receive grace through prayer.2

I feel like God is constantly condescending to our human limitations. So nice of Him, to wrap these constant reminders of the many faces of our neighbor into our days. Even if we pass by 99 of our neighbors, but allow the 100th person on the street to pierce our heart with love, we can still receive grace through prayer. It’s something to build on.

Charles didn’t travel much at the end, but he did take one last fishing trip to the coast with some friends. He returned home just days before his heart gave out, treasuring a photo holding a big fish with a big smile on his face ... the face given to him by God … a reminder to love our neighbor as ourselves.

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Q: What’s one way you are able to love your neighbor as yourself?

Spark: Expand your circle: try to pray for someone new today.

Resources:

{ My first photo (of many) captures the holy fire of Evangelismos Monastery in 2023 }

Saint Amphilochios & Saint Gavrilia

Father Amphilochios confessed Gavrilia and tonsured her on Patmos. There, in Saint Anthony’s chapel, she took her first vows as a small schema nun. He had been praying for a nun who would be willing to undertake missionary work, and there she was, ready to follow God’s calling all over India, Europe, the Middle East, Africa and North America. Saint Gavrilia was like the Mother Teresa of Orthodoxy.

This holy little chapel is hidden within Evangelismos Monastery, just a ten-minute walk down the ancient stone pathway from where we stay on our pilgrimages to Patmos, at the Gardens of Discovery Eco-Spiritual Centre in Chora.

A Secret Offering

Once, I was invited into this inner sanctum … into Saint Anthony’s chapel, the secret place away from visitors where Gavrilia was tonsured a nun. Glowing with candles, icons, and holiness, I could imagine the grizzled, nature-loving Priest of Patmos and spiritual father of Bishop Kallistos, annointing Gavrilia with holy oil in this dark, low-ceiling, intimate setting.

I prayed to her there, soaking in the rare experience inside the monastic chamber. On my way out, I quietly placed a small paper icon of Saint Gavrilia on a ledge, since there was still no icon of her to venerate at the monastery. A small offering. She is a new saint, and these things take time to establish. Clearly, the sisters are more patient than me!

‘Siga, siga’, they say. ‘Slowly, slowly’ … with patience, her icon will be added within the monastery for us to venerate, and in Greek time.

We did have a wonderful opportunity for the women in our pilgrimage to hear a talk on Saint Amphilochios in the cloister behind the Church last year. The Sister speaking to us did her best to translate the stories into English, and some of the Greek-speaking women in our group joined in to help the translation. At the end of the talk, we were surprised to learn that this kind and generous nun speaking to us was actually named Sister Gavrilia, after our beloved, newly canonized Saint Gavrilia.

Evangelismos Monastery is a sacred space for me, and I go there twice a year, when I’m on Patmos. Sometimes for a church service (in Greek), sometimes to venerate the tomb of Saint Amphilochios (down many stairs), and sometimes just to sit in the lush garden and be still among the bougainvillea.

Circle of Amphilochios, Kallistos, Gavrilia

Many of you have had a chance to watch the Beauty First Film, Amphilochios: Saint of Patmos. Much of the footage was filmed at this Evangelismos monastery.

God has gifted me with so many connections with Amphilochios, Kallistos and Gavrilia. Each of them holding an underlying missionary eagerness to share God’s love with others, as ‘Theologians of Light’. I am blessed to find myself as a board member of Beauty First Films; given a spiritual friendship with Bishop Kallistos; and the gift of a heart burning with love for Saint Gavrilia.

Saint Gavrilia found Saint Amphilochios through a komboskini (prayer rope) that had belonged to him, and had come to her through a friend. By following the path of this small prayer rope to Patmos, she became his spiritual daughter,

All of this came about thanks to a komboskini, the gift of her friend from Sweden. Because, as she used to say, ‘one thing leads to another’; because of the ‘Yes’ she kept saying from 1954 to the end of her days, to God’s plan for her life. How important, how difficult is this ‘Yes’, and yet how easy - we are told - once you begin saying it.1

Gavrilia’s ‘Thank You’ prayer

At every opportunity, Saint Gavrilia said ‘Yes’ to God. She organized her life around listening to the voice of God in stillness, along with helping others. She offered this simple way of praying with gratitude:

Some say komboskini prayers by just repeating ‘Thank You’.2

Try this: say ‘Thank You’ to God with each inbreath and outbreath, thinking of something or someone for which you are grateful (you can fill in the blanks yourself).

Breathe in: Thank you for providing us with meals each day.

Breathe out: Thank you for my heart that beats without my effort.

Breathe in: Thank you for my spouse or friend.

Breathe out: Thank you for the children in my life.

Breathe in: Thank you for the sun rising each day.

Breathe out: Thank you for monasteries, upholding the world with prayer.

Saint Gavrilia fed her soul on gratitude and trust in God.

We can too.

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Q: What’s on your gratitude list?

Spark: Pray ‘Thank You’ each day for a week, see how it feels.

Resources: Watch the film: Amphilochios: Saint of Patmos

{ Saint Gavrilia, photo courtesy of Aspasia Zonara, her spiritual daughter }

Our Gathering of New Spiritual Friends

Last weekend our new ‘Saint Gavrilia Circle of Light’ community enjoyed a rich time of conversation and questions with Aspasia Zonara, the spiritual daughter of the ‘Ascetic of Love’. This lively, musical, motorcycle mama has become a friend of our pilgrimages to Patmos and Leros.

We all spoke openly … no one wanted our time together to end!

Below is the rich Q&A portion of our conversation … nearly 40 people joining in from 6 countries, including Greece, France, Belgium, Guatemala, the Netherlands and the United States.

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Rebecca’s Q: What effect did she have on your children?

Aspasia: I was wearing long skirts, my hair, I was putting in a braid. I started looking a little bit like a nun in the beginning. It was like a total change. And, so that bothered them in the beginning, but they, they sort of followed me.

[After she died] my life changed totally and things went like a good puzzle and made a big, nice picture. I became a normal person. I was going to church, having Holy Communion, having a Spiritual Father, everything changed. And I got a message from a friend of mine that I should go to Patmos and teach the nuns handicrafts. And that was one of the most beautiful experiences because they were so like children. Let’s make this and let’s do that. I just had a phone call this morning from one of them, but I’ll call her later. So anyway.

Christina’s Q: In your relationship with St. Gavrilia, was there a point, or do you recognize a point in which she was truly free? Is there a specific point in time where she was she was free or was it a gradual process of becoming free? This is something that I’m very attracted to with her, is her freedom. She’s extricated from the world completely, but she loves the world. And I was just wondering if there was a point in time in which she could distinguish between being unentangled and unencumbered.

Aspasia: She had already gone to India. She would come and go. I would see her between travels because she was not always in Greece … she had a vision or something. She had been traveling a lot, so she heard the same sermon [three times in a row]. Sell your possessions, and the business, and follow me. And she took it personally that this is what God wanted her to do, to sell whatever she had, give it to the poor, and go to India. And she had this thing that she heard, like, India, India, India. It’s in the book.

But everything was like magic. And I don’t like to say magic because it sounds like she’s a magician or something. No, it was just like a fairy tale being with her. Everything she said, everything she did, her mannerisms. We would just sit in the middle of nowhere, in the car. I remember one thing she said, I wrote it somewhere in a book: “We are the salt of the world”, and I never wrote anything else. I just listened to what she said, and then we sat there in silence in the car. And we did that in Medias, also. We would just sit in the little room there, it was really nice, with a very light, light in the room. Very noisy outside, but you wouldn’t hear the noise, you would just hear the silence of Gavrilia.

Katherine’s Q: I’m a physical therapist. I’m curious what her clinic looked like, and if you wish she was still around to help you with your knee. How would she treat you?

Aspasia: She would put talcum powder on whatever it was, a knee or something, and she would gently caress it with her hands, and you would feel fine. I remember a story she said about a leper who had a problem with one of his feet, with one of his toes or something, and she took an aspirin, she broke it, and she gave it to him to drink, and the man’s foot was okay. Aspirin does not take out leprosy, no way. So, that’s another example of what she used to do, which is mind-blowing, if you don’t mind me saying so.

Amie’s Q: We have a busy family with lots of kids, and I’m wondering, what was her guidance or counsel to you for how to help guide our children in their spiritual life? And, outside of going to church, what is the best way that we can encourage them because, I mean, I’m a sinner, I’m not a saint, so I don’t want them to follow all my examples, you know? And so, what would you say was like some of her most frequent counsel to people who had children?

Aspasia: I’ll say it first in Greek: She would say παράδειγμα, which means ‘being an example’, which is very difficult. We have to be an example, and I never was an example, so I could never say to the children, ‘don't’. She would say, “Don't say: 'don't do this, or don't do that’. You have to be what you want them to be.” But no scolding, “No, you shouldn’t do that.” She’s very sweet about everything … I think when you meet people like Agios Porphyrios, or Saint Gavrilia, or people who are really spiritually, very spiritual, there’s no way you cannot get a little. Think of it, you know, a little spark, even a little spark, and then sometimes you can make it grow, or you just throw it away, or whatever, it depends on you.

Gabrielle’s Q: In her book, she talks about the Australian man that she helped, because he was searching for the truth, and then she kind of allowed him to go back to the Christian way. I don’t know if, in your encounters with Saint Gavrilia, she talked to you about how she helped people who were looking for the truth and went to oriental traditions to find God.

Aspasia: She knew about a Greek who had gone and had really been badly involved with Hindu and gurus, and he was on the wrong path. But I think she did her prayer for him, that’s why some people in Greece have really misunderstood her. They think she’s a mystic, or a guru, or she was taking care of gurus. She had nothing to do with it. She was loved by the people of India a lot, and respected because of the way she loved people, she would take care of people, she had no distinction between poor. She was not afraid of sicknesses and illnesses. She said, if God wants me to be sick, I will be sick. I wish I was like her. In something, of all these things. Such a beautiful person.

Gabrielle’s Q: And I think I was also interested in if you want to share from your relationship, because you said you were a hippie and you loved India very much. Like how, what's that?

Aspasia: That was the reason that I was interested to go meet her, because if I just saw a nun with a black headdress, I wouldn’t have given her any attention, because, I wasn’t interested at that moment. But as soon as she opened her mouth and started saying about her travel from Greece, with the buses and going to India and the things and the people and all that. The colors and the smells, I was enthused. I said, okay, I’ve got to see this woman, and I went to see her, but I never realized that God had just found a way to get me on the road again to Christianity and not Hinduism or, you know, meditation and things like that. I’m glad that I didn’t follow Sai Baba when he came to Greece, because I freaked out with what he was doing. I said, no way, thank you. I was … I was protected by God, really. I really feel that I’ve been protected the whole time. I could have been stuck in India, maybe. I never went. But, maybe sister’s timing was just right.

Jeff’s Q: Of course, you read her work, and you see just how gentle and how sweet and loving, and she joins many others in that way about her. But, I've noticed, too, that when she needs to, she's not afraid to poke, and it's, of course, done out of love and for our salvation. Did you kind of observe that too? Not that she would be ever afraid of giving her opinion. She was very willing to give it very much out of love. Did you notice that?

Aspasia: Yes, her opinion is very important, what she would say, but she would never say it unless you asked her sometimes because she didn’t want to, you know, your egoism. She would never hit you with that. But she was very, very gentle and very loving, and always was, for example, she had in her cell a picture … she had a card that someone sent her, it was handmade. And she knew that I liked handicrafts, so she gave it to me. She says, this was from India. It’s a sunset. I still have it. And I love it. And it’s out of paper or something. And she, she had the sensitivity to think of giving it to me as an idea. Who else as a nun would do that? I mean, I know it’s not an important thing. But, she was very gentle and very … thoughtful.

And that’s what I liked about Medias [The House of the Angels in Athens]. There were so many different people coming into that little flat. I’m sure if someone was out there with a camera like they do now, at the entrance you would see all these different kind of people coming in. Hippies, maniacs, crazy guys, knapsacks, God knows, we … all kinds of people would go there. It was really fun. I would never be bored to look at all this going in and out.

Kara’s Q: So I was wondering just in that description of her becoming the other person, it sounds like there was a lot of that happening. She was just right there for you. And so in that relationship, was she questioning you, or did she just listen to you? And also, just understanding that you really didn’t become a church-going person until after her repose, like how much did she kind of question you or, you know, point to you. You said she doesn’t say, “do this, or you should do that”. I’m just so curious how she communicated.

Aspasia: You would just sit, you would go in that little room and you could just talk and talk as if I was talking to Jennifer or Melanie or you. It was just very comfortable. You didn’t feel like you were talking to a nun. That’s a basic thing. As soon as you see someone, a nun, you’ll say, you have to be very pious, you have to be very serious, you can’t say jokes. She was full of jokes and full of humor and witty and saying things all the time. She had stories to say. You’d say one thing and she’d come up with a story. “Yes, and when I went there and the other, yes.” So she always had something to share with you, whatever you’d say.

But that’s why I say from the book, it says “A veil would fall and she would become you, and you were talking to someone like you and not a nun, you know, because you wouldn’t be able to communicate, maybe. So all these people who would go were not all church-going people. We were probably crazy, hippie, something. And she would never show you that you’re strange or you’re different. You would never hear her criticize anybody, that's for sure. No, never.

Rebecca’s Q: Saint Gavrilia’s remarks about not existing, that puzzles me. I feel God has made me and provided me with many wonderful blessings and made me who I am. What did Saint Gavrilia mean about not existing?

Aspasia: That’s a good question. I don’t know how to answer that, really. I’ll try. I think what she meant by not existing, it’s not her ego. It’s not me. I’m not Gavrilia. I’m not God. I’m just a vessel. And I give what I get from God to you. That’s what I think it is. That’s what I think she means. Basically, I don’t exist. If you don’t exist, you’re not hungry. You don’t say, I’m hot. If you say hot, you’ll be hot. The funniest thing she said was, ”I have the angels wings as air conditioning.” So if she doesn’t exist, she doesn’t have heat, she doesn’t feel things. You would never hear her say, “Oh, I’m hungry,” or “I’m thirsty,” or “I’m tired,” or “I’m bored,” nothing. There was no expression of the sort. You would just feel like, "Okay, this time is for you, and that's for you." And that was it. You would leave. Fully and happily and saying, God, thank you for this moment with this wonderful person. And that’s about it. That’s what she means. I don’t exist. It’s not an ego trip. I’m not me. God has given me what I am. I exist only through him.

For our ending prayer, Aspasia taught us all the Jesus Prayer in Greek:

Κύριε Ἰησοῦ Χριστέ έλέησόν με

KEE-ree-ay Ee-SOO khree-STAY … eh-lay-ee-SOHN meh

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Q: What would be your question about Saint Gavrilia?

Spark: Register for our next ‘Circle of Light’ gathering this fall.

Resources: Nun Gavrilia Georgiou, The Ascetic of Love: The Life and Teachings of Saint Gavrilia, trans. Helen Anthony (Sea Salt Books, 2025).

This important book is available at Sea Salt Books and Prayerspa.etsy.com

{ Saint Gavrilia’s spiritual daughter, Aspasia (right), welcomes us into her home on Leros }

Meet Aspasia

Last month I hopped on a catamaran to visit Aspasia in her artful home on Leros Island, a quick trip across the choppy waters of the Aegean Sea from Patmos. She welcomed me, as she did our 2025 group of pilgrims (shown above) with stories, sweets, and sharing her hand craftsmanship, as an artist and bookmaker, in the service of her beloved spiritual mother, Saint Gavrilia.

Her Beginnings with Sister Gavrilia

In her small book of photos and quotes of Saint Gavrilia, The Soaring of the Soul1, Aspasia writes how her relationship with the ‘Ascetic of Love’ began.

Our first encounter together with Sister Gavrilia was a surprise, a gift, something really unexpected. I met her at a friend’s house between 1977-78. She was speaking about her journey from Greece to India. The Hippy movement had a great influence on me … the Indian culture: philosophy, music, dress, etc. I was a hippy (flower cild) as a teenager. So immediately I was interested and gave absolute attention to what she was talking about. Otherwise I wouldn’t have been so interested. God who knows how to touch each person’s heart, He found the way to touch mine.

When she finished her story and it was time for us to return home I approached her and asked, “Where and when can I come to see you?” She answered: - “Tomorrow Midias 7”, and so it was. I went to see her. We sat together, just the two of us, and shared a beautiful moment. After that we had many more blessed moments together. Each time was a celebration, a gift!!!

She had a charming way to guide you spiritually with her full of love spirit. She’d give joy, companionship, care, affection to all people: sick, lonely, helpless and to all those who have pain. She woud even entertain them. She’d tell me, “take your guitar and let’s go”. She loved music and accompanied me, waving her hand and being the conductor. What wonderful memories!!!!

I remember once, when I went to see her, to share my thoughts and problems with her. She was a good listener. She would leave you to go to the next room to pray. Upon returning, she would put her hands on you and say something spiritual and reassuring. You didn’t have someone who kept you at a distance but a true friend who understood you. Only for a moment being there with her, everything that burdened you would vanish. This was unreal!!! I felt that I wasn’t walking on earth, but flying spiritually. Paradise on Earth!!!

She would say: “Prayer is state of mind. Whatever we do each day, we do it like hearing music in the distance. We listen to the essence and existence of God”. Sister Gavrilia was the person that God’s Love allowed to come into my life and with her love, prayer, and guidance to follow the way of the Lord. She showed me His Love. My relationship with God was fulfilled and strengthened after her death. Three things we need: Love for God, Faith, and Saint Gavrilia as a friend and guide!!!!

May we have Her Blessing!

~ Aspasia Zonara

Details for our 2nd Circle of Light Gathering

Join us this Saturday, July 11 at 9 am PT/ 12 noon ET, to hear more from this vibrant friend of many of us now, Aspasia, speaking to us from Leros, Greece.

We will open the ‘Saint Gavrilia Circle of Light’ gathering on zoom with a candle and a prayer, Listen to a few stories from Aspasia’s time with Gavrilia, have some time to ask questions, then join in a book discussion on Chapter 1: Constantinople, from The Ascetic of Love: The Life and Teachings of Saint Gavrilia2. Come with your questions, thoughts, and an open heart for spiritual discussion with your new friends. All are welcome.

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Q: What would you like to experience in a new spiritual community centered on the Ascetic of Love?

Spark: Bring a question, a story, and an open heart.

Resources: If this is your first gathering, register for the zoom link at SaintGavrilia.org.

2

Nun Gavrilia Georgiou, The Ascetic of Love: The Life and Teachings of Saint Gavrilia, trans. Helen Anthony (Sea Salt Books, 2025). Available at Sea Salt Books and PrayerSpa.Etsy.com. (This is the new Pink edition - the classic Black edition is great too)

{ Fun to watch and film these wiley friends on a trip to Costa Rica ~ the capuchin monkeys }

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Monkey Mind

Monkeys are fun. They make capricious leaps, swing back and forth on branches, and chase one another nimbly through the jungle of our minds.

So how do we sit for hours at a meditation retreat, without those monkeys running all over our best efforts in our oh-so-distractible prayer life?

It can take a million metanoias to beat those wiley guys.

Meditation vs Prayer

Metanoia combines two smaller Greek words: meta = beyond, and nous = mind or spirit. It is sometimes considered as repentance, but at a more basic level, Metanoia can simply be “a changing of mind”.

“Meditation” and “Contemplative Prayer” are often interchangeable terms, although they can be used distinctly, as well. “Meditation” can be seen to focus on the mind, and managing thoughts, while “Contemplative Prayer” often focuses on the heart, and being with God.

Advice from the Philokalia

In the Philokalia, Saint Nikiphoros takes a practical approach to taming those monkeys, by training your intellect not to leave the heart quickly. When the monkeys strike, pay them no attention. Simply turn your attention back to the prayer and continue (until they strike again!)

He gives us simple instructions to discover ‘indescribable delight’ through breathing, repeating the Jesus Prayer, and banishing those monkeys, writing,

Seat yourself, then concentrate your intellect, and lead it into the respiratory passage through which your breath passes into your heart. Put pressure on your intellect and compel it to descend with your inhaled breath into your heart. Once it has entered there, what follows will be neither dismal nor glum. Just as a man, after being far away from home, on his return is overjoyed at being with his wife and children again, so the intellect, once it is united with the soul, is filled with indescribable delight.

Therefore, brother, train your intellect not to leave your heart quickly, for at first it is strongly disinclined to remain constrained and circumscribed in this way. But once it becomes accustomed to remaining there, it can no longer bear to be outside the heart. For the kingdom of heaven is within us (Luke 17:21); and when the intellect concentrates its attention in the heart and through pure prayer searches there for the kingdom of heaven, all external things become abominable and hateful to it. If, then, after your first attempts you enter through your intellect into the abode of the heart in the way that I have explained, give thanks and glory to God and exult in Him. Continually persevere in this and it will teach you what you do not know.

Moreover, when your intellect is firmly established in your heart, it must not remain there silent and idle; it should constantly repeat and meditate on the prayer, ‘Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me’, and should never stop doing this. For this prayer protects the intellect from distraction, renders it impregnable to diabolic attacks, and every day increases its love and desire for God.

If, however, in spite of all your efforts you are not able to enter the realms of the heart in the way I have enjoined, do what I now tell you and with God’s help you will find what you seek … Banish, then, all thoughts from this faculty – and you can do this if you want to – and in their place put the prayer, ‘Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me’, and compel it to repeat this prayer ceaselessly. If you continue to do this for some time, it will assuredly open for you the entrance to your heart in the way we have explained, and as we ourselves know from experience.1

I love how Nikiphoros speaks to us like friends, from the 13th century. Just as our priests and teachers encourage us today, continue to turn back to the Jesus Prayer, to your Sacred Word or Mantra, to increase your love and desire for God.

Humility and Grit

It’s really not that complicated. It just takes some humility to keep turning back toward God and way from those wiley monkeys, while accepting our imperfect pursuit of stillness. And some grit to stick to it.

Saint Nikiphoros echoes the take-away morsel in my book, The Little Way of a Pilgrim. “Be with God always in your heart, while keeping God always in your thoughts.” Prayer and meditation. The heart and the head. Nice combo.

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Q: Do you respond more to the pursuit of Meditation or Contemplative Prayer?

Spark: Give yourself a little interior smile, each time you turn your back on the monkeys.

Resources:

{ liturgical procession aroud bonnevaux monastery }

Our Daily Prayer Practice

By some great stroke of Spirit, I find myself on pilgrimage, back in Southwest France at Bonnevaux Benedictine Abbey. Former Achbishop of Canterbury, Fr. Rowan Williams, is here, speaking on Poets, Prayer and Vision. Wonderful to listen to, and to soak in his deep and jovial wisdom.

Pilgrimage opens doors inside us. Of course there will be travel bumps along the way to help prepare us for our yearned-for arrival. For me, this meant Greek busses that would not stop for a beach day on the way to the airport … Paris hotels that delayed my late check-in process until just after the restaurant had closed … a train cancellation due to 105 degree temperatures which caused me to reroute and miss the group introduction session at Bonnevaux.

But metanoia (a change in mind or heart) can come in many forms, and the joy of finally settling into this new spiritual adventure far outweighs the trouble it took to get here.

Here, we have four 30-minute meditation sessions daily, and short services for morning, mid-day, and evening prayers. These are interspersed with spiritual readings from a variety of sources that support the practice of contemplative prayer, with one minute of silence in between readings. Occasionally there is a Eucharistic service, of which, being Orthodox, I cannot partake. But I enjoy the beauty of it, still. All of this takes place within the renovated Abbey Barn, across the path from the Guesthouse and Refectory. A beautiful setting to practice the Jesus Prayer, or your contemplative ‘sacred word’ in community with other Christians.

“Pray Thou Thyself in Me”

After our first meditation session, I was sitting outside beneath the great Plane trees, sharing ideas on the creative process with a new friend. She went back to making marks in her art notebook, and I continued reading from the writings of Fr. Lawrence Freeman, director of the World Community for Christian Meditation (WCCM) here.

My “Aha!” moment came, after years of latent curiosity about this recurring phrase, “Pray Thou Thyself in Me”. Father Lawrence writes,

St. Paul said that we do not know how to pray, but the Spirit prays within us (Romans 8:26). This is the key to understanding the real meaning of Christian prayer. It suggests that we learn to pray not by trying to pray, but by giving up, or letting go, of our trying. And instead, learning to be.

This opens access to the deeper prayer of the heart, where we can find the ”love of God flooding our inmost heart through the Holy Spirit he has given us” (Romans 6:5). This is pure experience, beyond thought, dogma and imagination. Meditation is a universal spiritual practice, which guides us into this state of prayer, into the prayer of Christ. It brings us to silence, stillness and simplicity.1

Did you hear that?

THE SPIRIT PRAYS WITHIN US … with the LOVE OF GOD FLOODING OUR INMOST HEART!

It’s enough to instantly help descend your mind into your heart, with warmth. You can also ask the Spirit to pray within you as preparation, before you begin praying the Jesus Prayer or your ‘sacred word’ in meditation. Simply say, “Holy Spirit, pray in me.”

Like me, I’m sure you’ve heard these quotes from Romans before, but they have never struck me so deeply with the simple truth that the Holy Spirit is actually doing the praying in our hearts … as pure experience.

So in our daily practice of contemplative prayer, we can tell ourselves,

Lean into it!

Stop overthinking this thing!

Simply BE with the God who loves me.

Committing our inner and outer resources to be fed spiritually are sometimes what it takes to gain spiritual gems like this, with a pilgrim’s fresh viewpoint.

Rowan Williams’ Wisdom

Fr. Rowan Williams has been a brilliant illuminator of mystical poetry and contemplative prayer/meditation throughout this week at Bonnevaux. Speaking broadly on the topic of too many words being flung about and unnecessarily piled up, he narrowed the conversation with this thought:

All meditation is learning to step just a little away from idol worship.

I raised my hand, got the scary microphone, and asked,

“By idol worship, do you mean attempting to make God in our own image? Anthropomorphizing God?

Fr. Rowan nodded his head, yes. Food for thought.

Saint Philaret

“Pray Thou Thyself in Me” (another way of saying ‘Holy Spirit pray in me’) is the last, short line on my letterpress prayer card of St Philaret’s Prayer for the Beginning of the Day.2

It’s everybody’s favorite.

O Lord, grant that I may meet the coming day in peace.

Help me in all things to rely upon Thy holy will.

In every hour of the day, reveal Thy will to me.

Bless my dealings with all who surround me.

Teach me to treat all that comes to me throughout the day with peace of soul, and with the firm conviction that Thy will governs all.

In all my deeds and words guide my thoughts and feelings.

In unforseen events, let me not forget that all are sent by Thee.

Teach me to act firmly and wisely, without embittering and embarrassing others.

Give me the strength to bear the fatigue of the coming day with all that it shall bring.

Direct my will.

Teach me to pray.

Pray Thou Thyself in me. Amen.

And just like that (Snap!) we are connecting with the Spirit of God, warming our hearts. Aha!

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Q: What does “the Spirit prays within us” (Romans 8:26 mean to you?

Spark: If you love this Prayer for the Beginning of the Day, print it out, trim it down and spend some time with it. Or order a letterpress copy, below.

Resources:

{ my Patmos home-away-from-home office overlooking Prophet Elijah’s hilltop church }

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Patmos Scriptorium

Ancient Greek grammar has never really been my thing, but I’ve been getting to know the dreaded ‘Iota Subscript’ quite intimately lately. Now we’re friends.

My twice-yearly trips to Patmos have been to lead Pilgrimages and to teach Scriptorium book arts workshops. The Pilgrimages focus on contemplative prayer, while enjoying savory Mediterranean treats along the way, like a swim in the Aegean … a platter of little fried sardines … a hike down the ancient stone path to the Cave of the Apocalypse.

The handmade Gospel of John the Beloved from the modern Scriptorium of the Tree of Life is a separate project I’ve been working on for years, with a small team at the Gardens of Discovery Eco-Spiritual Centre on Patmos.

This past week, I’ve entered new level of editing the Greek text in this handmade book, with parallel Greek and English text, side by side … page by page.

This will be a handbound edition of something rare and extraordinary in the world, God willing.

Books and Words

I attended the International CODEX Book Art Fair & Symposium earlier this year in California … a sea of intricately handmade editioned books. A marvel to behold! Illuminating.

Compared to the other three Synoptic Gospels, the Gospel of John is a love story. It begins … “Eν ἀρχῇó ἦν ὁ λόγος, καὶ ὁ λόγος ἦν πρὸς τὸν θεόν, καὶ θεὸς ἦν ὁ λόγος.” “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.”

This ‘Word’ is mysterious and inspiring. Especially for us writers. Maybe we are participating in the reality of God with our words. Or maybe we are not.

Why did Saint John the Beloved choose to call Christ ‘The Word’? Here on Patmos, the Cave of the Apocalypse is the centre of the universe. It’s the Cave where Saint John is said to have written the Book of Revelation, instructed by the Holy Spirit, whispering through the triune crack in the massive rock that is the ceiling of this holy, potent little Church.

Prochorus was Saint John’s scribe. He wrote down the ‘words’, dictated by John, who listened to the Holy Spirit. John was considered an elegant writer of these ‘words’. An elusive concept, to try to understand Christ as the ‘Word’.

It’s not easy to get to Patmos. An 8-hour ferry ride from Athens/Piraeus, and the ferries don’t go every day. When they do, they either arrive after midnight, or after 2 am. Thank God for taxis! Those guys always show up, and they have the best insights into life on the island, once you get to know them.

I’ve been coming here twice a year since 2023. It feeds my soul, in spite of the long hours of meetings and endless work for the Centre, which Bishop Kallistos helped support, and his friend, Ioanna, has been building for 20 years.

As I listen to the Holy nudge, I return again and again. A blessing, in so many ways, to use the gifts and experience God has placed into my life, in these ways.

Saint Gavrilia’s Spiritual Daughter

I spent Sunday, my day off, on Leros, a 45-minute catamaran ride away. I go there often, to venerate Saint Gavrilia, and spend time with her spiritual daughter, my friend, the amazing Aspasia. We went to Saint Gavrilia’s Castle Church, we hung out at her traditional Greek home, ate yummy pizza, and she taught me the Jesus Prayer in Greek. I’ve been practicing! And you can too, here, with Aspasia’s voice memo:

Κύριε Ἰησοῦ Χριστέ, ἐλέησόν με.
Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me.

Drop me a line, or stay tuned, if you are interested in following our progress on the ‘Gospel of John the Beloved’. Truly, a work of heart.

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Q: What is a recent ‘work of heart’ in your life?

Spark: Memorize the Jesus Prayer in Greek, with Aspasia.

Resources: Listen to the penetrating Gospel of Saint John the Beloved, with Sir David Suchet:

{ see that low tree hanging over the muskrat pond … that was my daily sit spot }

Stillness in France

I just left a peaceful 12th-century Benedictine monastery in France, where a group of us gathered to learn an integrative approach to re-connecting with God’s Creation.

The Bonnevaux Meditation Retreat Centre is the international home of The World Community for Christian Meditation (WCCM), of which Bishop Kallistos was a part for many years. It is a place of peace, healing, and inspiration, with a diverse calendar of ecumenical retreats throughout the year.

I was drawn to this retreat, Living Reconciliation: From Separation to Contemplation for a variety of reasons, not least as a response to the Holy Nudge I have been feeling to focus my pilgrimage work toward young adults.

Christine Kristof was the retreat leader, who has spent 20 years working in the realm of Eco-Spirituality. Again, Bishop Kallistos shows up, helping to direct her toward this area of study, early in her career. Orthodox priest, activist, and theologian, Fr. Michel Maxime Egger, was also an influence for Christine, as was Joanna Macy, founder of ‘The Work that Reconnects’, a worldwide movement supporting the interdependence of all living things.

The retreat was given in French, a fun and challenging stretch for my language skills. Fortunately, brave Laura Brav, formerly of Doctors without Borders, and Thomas Litzler, a permaculture farmer and Bonnevaux leader, helped our handful of English speakers with the complex concepts.

Your chosen spot

Sit Spots can be like a spiritual ‘Home away from home’ for your prayer life. It may be a place you land only once along your way, or a place that belongs to you in your heart and in nature that you keep returning to.

To find your sit spot, wander attentively through the piece of nature that has been presented to you. Listen to the sounds around you, look closely at the intricate patterns, breathe deeply to take in the delicate scents that may be just below the surface, and feel the textures of nature with your fingertips. Engage all your senses to bring to this new relationship with your chosen place. Once choosen, your Sit Spot belongs to you.

Now you have carved out your own place in nature to connect with the gifted beauty of Creation, and BE with God in stillness. It wasn’t that hard, was it?

Christine Kristof showed us the way,

Go to your sit spot. Work with your heart. Encounter some part of nature, plant or animal. Be open to them, to the ‘Other’ who comes to you. Open to the present moment (you can speak out loud or not.) Greet the Other, then be silent for a while. Be open to whatever comes to you. Pay attention to your 5 senses. Pay attention. Re-enter into connection. Open your heart to the nous … to wonder and awe … to possible ecstasy. Then say thank you and good-bye.

The songbirds, muscrats, badger dens and growing things were so abundant at Bonnevaux. A whole ecosystem we rarely realize is happening right under our feet, around the world.

The miracles of the Earth are gifts, and our relationship with our Earth is mutually vital. When we pray, “Lord, Jesus Christ, have mercy on us,” let us include the Earth in our heartsong, and the Earth will sing back to us, through God’s creation.

I am the bird singing. I gift to you my song.

Panentheism not Pantheism

Bishop Kallistos was an avid ecologist, along with his spiritual father, Saint Amphilochios, lover of trees on Patmos.

Kallistos was clear about the difference between Pantheism and Panentheism, which was one of the topics of this eco-spiritual retreat. He wrote,

I intend by panentheism simply the view that God includes and penetrates the entire universe, so that every part of it exists in Him; and yet, as against pantheism, God’s being is more than the universe and is not exhausted by it. Totally immanent, He is at the same time totally transcendent. The pantheist, that is to say, asserts, “God is the world and the world is God;” and that, I submit, is not a Christian option. The panentheist, by contrast, affirms “God is in the world and the world is in God;” and that, I submit, is entirely Christian – not only a possible way of understanding the meaning of creation, but the only way that is genuinely in accordance with the Bible.1

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Q: Where would your ideal sit spot be?

Spark: Find a quiet place to be with God in nature this week.

Resources: Christine Kristof's Anima Terra website (in French)

{ beloved prayer to the Holy Spirit, who made a surprise little cameo in this photo! }

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Tongues of fire

I awoke at 3 am on the Monday of the Holy Spirit in the Orthodox faith.

All was quiet and somehow effervescent before my candle. A pregnant time of waiting to begin my travels to spiritual places in France and Greece later that day, on June 1st.

Anticipation…

We had just celebrated Pentacost on Sunday, with the tongues of fire resting on each of the apostles, as in this Kontakion chant:

Once, when He descended and confounded the tongues, the Most High divided the nations; and when He divided the tongues of fire, He called all men into unity; and with one accord we glorify the All-Holy Spirit.

Fitting for my journey, as I am about to embark upon an eco-spiritual retreat in French, which I have studied and practiced for years, but still feel unprepared to absorb in a long weekend retreat. After departing from this 12th-century French monastery, I will be diving deep into the Greek version of the Gospel of John the Beloved with our Scriptorium team on Patmos. Lord have mercy!

Language Learning

When you learn a new language, you also learn a new context for thinking about things - not as direct translation, but through the lens of the culture behind it.

Breaking down barriers with French retreat leaders by learning French, is like breaking down barriers between us and God, by learning the language of silence.

As I go, I carry in my heart the simplified Pentacost prayer found throughout the New Testament:

Holy Spirit, dwell in me.

Holy Spirit, dwell in me.

Holy Spirit, dwell in me.

After asking, it is important to listen.

Who would the Holy Spirit choose?

A few days later, in Poitiers, France, I learned a lesson by listening to the Holy Spirit.

Yesterday two street guys asked for money and I brusquely said ‘No’, and briskly walked past them. Then I asked myself, WWGD? (What would Saint Gavrilia do?) I want to face God’s children with love, even if they are rough, and on the mean streets.

So today I came prepared. Two 1-Euro pieces in my pocket. I was just consulting my heart and the Holy Spirit (WWHSD?), about whether to give to every needy person I met, or to those who asked, even demanded. I was thinking that I should give to the gentle who did not demand or scare me, and not reward the belligerent who may curse at me otherwise.

Just then, I passed a gentle soul, splayed on the sidewalk, and thought to give him a Euro. But at that moment, another person stepped in front of me to give him one, so I was blocked, and kept walking. A moment later, a rough guy who had cursed at me the day before, got in my face and asked me for money. I looked in his eyes, took out my coin, and handed it to him with love. He raised his fist for a fist bump, his eyes suddenly soft. We smiled as we fist-bumped, thanked one another, and acknowledged our shared humanity as we went our separate ways.

I had my answer.

Heavenly King, O Comforter, the Spirit of Truth, Who art everywhere present and fillest all things; Treasury of every Good, and Bestower of Life, Come and dwell in us, and cleanse us from every stain, and save our souls, O Good One.

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Q: How do you find ways to love your rough neighbor, the child of God?

Spark: Connect with the Comforter through the beloved prayer, above.

Resources:

Letterpress Prayer to the Holy Spirit (from photo) available on my etsy store:

prayerspa.etsy.com

{ my daughter baked this flowering artwork for our visit … a mindful act of love }

God is Bread.

We experience this each time we partake of the Eucharist. We take God into our bodies, and we abide in Christ.

Our bodies are nourished daily by the food given to us through God’s creation, as our spirits are nourished by the Creator of all this goodness, if we choose to partake in this act of Love.

“Jesus declared, “I am the bread of life. Whoever comes to me will never go hungry.” (John 6:35)

In the Philokalia, Nikiphoros the Hesychast speaks in the 13th century of ‘Attentiveness’ as Bread.

Here’s the Recipe:

He describes attentiveness (Nepsis/Νῆψις or Prosochi/Προσοχή) in different ways, like ingredients in a recipe for spiritual growth:

Guarding the intellect.

Custody of the heart.

Watchfulness.

Noetic stillness.

The beginning of contemplation.

The palace of the mindfulness of God.

The ground of faith, hope and love.

The stronghold that enables us patiently to accept all.

Nikiphoros writes,

Some of the saints have called attentiveness the guarding of the intellect; others have called it custody of the heart, or watchfulness, or noetic stillness, and others something else. All these expressions indicate one and the same thing, just as ‘bread’ and ‘a round’ or ‘a slice’ do; and you should read them in this sense. Attentiveness … is the beginning of contemplation or, rather, its presupposition, for through it God, descrying [discerning] its presence in us reveals Himself to the intellect. It is serenity of intellect or, rather, the repose bestowed on the soul through God’s mercy. It is the subjection of our thoughts, the palace of the mindfulness of God, the stronghold that enables us patiently to accept all that befalls. It is the ground of faith, hope and love. For if you do not have faith you cannot endure the outward afflictions that assail you; and if you do not bear them gladly you cannot say to the Lord, ‘Thou are my helper and my refuge’ (Ps 91:2) And if the Most High is not your refuge you will not lay up His love in your heart.1

Mindfulness

I was surprised to find ‘Mindfulness’ as a subject in the Philokalia. Not a new concept, after all. A way of focusing your attention on the present moment. Practicing the presence of God is an ingredient in the recipe for Attentiveness.

But it makes sense. If we guard our intellect and focus on our heart, our minds cannot run wild with anxiety. Mindfulness teaches us ‘subjection’, or conscious discipline of our thoughts, which allow us to practice BEING with God. This can attract God’s grace, bringing peace and serenity.

When we find our refuge in God, we have a Helper and safe place to address the outward afflictions that assail us.

The Jesus Prayer

The Jesus Prayer is a refuge … a centuries-old practice that helps in this process.

Nikiphoros the Hesychast was an early guide, helping those in his circles to protect the intellect, while increasing love and desire for God in our hearts. He explains,

When your intellect is firmly established in your heart, it must not remain there silent and idle; it should constantly repeat and meditate on the prayer, ‘Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me’, and should never stop doing this. For this prayer protects the intellect from distraction, renders it impregnable to diabolic attacks, and every day increases its love and desire for God.2

Or as I write in The Little Way of a Pilgrim, “Be with God always in your heart, while keeping God always in your mind”.

So whether you approach attentiveness as mindfulness, contemplation or stillness, you can enjoy your daily ‘bread’ or ‘round’ or ‘slice’ while BEING with God in your heart … an interior way of protection, serenity and love.

Q: Which ingredient appeals most to you today?

Spark: Write it down and let it rise…

Resources:

{ layers of holy caves … layers of arrow prayers from the centuries on Patmos }

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Speaking about silence…

Silence can be a torture chamber.

The minute we bow our heads and close the door to our inner chamber, enemy thoughts rush in and start throwing pots and pans around the room.

Sometimes the best laid plans don’t work out. You spend all day baking a chocolate ganache torte for the party, and the birthday girl is allergic to dairy. Setting aside time to pray can feel like that.

Last week’s AxiaWomen PNW online gathering offered our group an open conversation centered on the beautiful truth that, “The Language of God is Silence”.

But the question came up, “What to do when the Jesus Prayer, and even silence itself, feels like torture?”

The Jesus Prayer is just one way of BEING with God. The Church offers us a poetic library of daily prayers we can dive into at home … a beautifully crafted year of liturgical services we can attend at church … written and impromptu prayers of gratitude, petition and thanksgiving … doxology!

Saint Gavrilia (this modern saint everyone is falling in love with these days) says,

Some say Komboskini prayers by just repeating, ‘Thank you.’1

Many ways of desert prayers

The Jesus Prayer had its origins in the desert.

4th-century monastics retreated from the whitewashing of Christianity, happening under Constantine’s legalization of the faith through the Edict of Milan. They must have been experiencing a similar feeling to our 21st-century problem … society was moving forward so fast, they just wanted to return to God in simplicity. So Arrow Prayers were born.

As you can read about in my earlier post, Arrow Prayers: Origin of the Jesus Prayer, they were short and sweet — shot straight from the heart to God. No need to get the mind all tangled up in things. Just go direct.

Examples of early arrow prayers could be favorite verses from Scripture, like ‘Lord make haste to help me’, ‘Create in me a clean heart’, ‘Lord save me’, or even simply repeating the name of ‘Jesus’.

Saint Macarius, the Desert Father who championed the heart as the anthropological center of the human person, paving the way for the Jesus Prayer, was known to pray,

Blessed be the Lord for all things!

Blessed be the Lord for all things!

Blessed be the Lord for all things!

If the Jesus Prayer feels painful instead of life-giving to you for some reason, there are many other ways of connecting with your heavenly Father. Family is like that.

Choose your ‘Sacred Word’

This summer I will be returning to France, to practice stillness in a 12th century Benedictine monastery, where the World Community for Contemplative Meditation (WCCM) offers retreats.

We sit together with other practitioners of hesychasm for 30 minutes, four times a day. At the ecumenical Bonnevaux Retreat Center, everyone is asked to choose a ‘Sacred Word’, which is a kind of Arrow Prayer.

I love to continue my practice of the Jesus Prayer in retreats like this, as Bishop Kallistos also practiced with this group. If you don’t have your own ‘Sacred Word’, the leaders suggest ‘Maranatha’, which means ‘Come, Lord’ in Aramaic, whose advantage of lyrical sonority without recognizable language has its advantages in prayer. The Jesus Prayer in Greek, ‘Kyrie Eleison’ is spiritually useful too.

An experienced guide

If the Jesus Prayer isn’t bringing you peace … if you feel tortured by being in stillness … if painful memories from the past keep barging in on your inner chamber, an experienced guide might walk with you through this painful problem. Another word for ‘experienced guide’ is ‘Starets’.

In The Ascetic of Love, one of Saint Gavrilia’s spiritual children wrote: We have found a Starets!

The true Starets is, in this sense, a prophetic figure, not an institutional official. Kallistos Ware, Bishop of Diokleia, emphasizes that while most commonly a priest-monk, he may also be a married parish priest, or else simply a monk, or even a nun, or a lay person living in the outside world.2

One of the women in our Axia gathering last week suggested finding a monastery, near or far away, and speaking to the abbess, listening to her advice. I have done this in monasteries near and far, and it can be a great comfort, within the sisterhood of the Body of Christ.

Speak to God … with words

You can also take the matter directly to God.

Sister Magdalen gave me some beautiful advice, when we talked about prayer at the Essex Monastery in England some years ago. She encouraged me to go straight to the source and say,

“Lord, you see how cold my heart is … come and BE with me … warm my heart … teach me how to pray.”

When we spend time with God, speaking to God with words or in our silence, we strengthen our bond with him, just as when we spend time with friends.

There are so many ways of ‘Being with God’, just as there are so many ways of being with our other friends. Each of us are made with unique characters, needs, and brilliances. We can have a heart to heart talk with the One who made us — the One who knows and loves us best.

Listen to your own heart. There is not a ‘one size fits all’ way to BE with God. Ask the Holy Spirit to guide you. Whether in stillness, contemplative walking, psalmody, music, liturgy, the prayers of the Church or the prayers of your heart, press forward to find your own conversation with Him. Maybe instead of stillness you put in your ear pods and listen to music, chanting, or some quiet ‘noise’, if that provides a shelter for your heart, while you pray.

Call upon the Angels

We have our own spiritual bodyguards, but we must remember to call on them for help. The are a protective force, and share our goals of drawing near to God. We are guided, guarded, protected by our Guardian Angel. Its worth developing this relationship.

Saint Gavrilia was especially attached to the Angels, throughout her daily life. Someone asked her, “And how can we become friends with the Angels?” I imagine a glint in her eye, as she replied,

‘That is a personal matter. You will find out by yourselves.3

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Q: When have you experienced stillness in prayer without silence?

Spark: Try a new way with the Jesus Prayer … listening to chant, walking, Greek!

Resources: Find Ascetic of Love through SeaSalt Books or my Etsy store.

{ Saint Gavrilia’s reliquary, much loved and venerated on Leros Island, Greece }

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Walking your Dog

When we begin to love a saint, as with a favorite teacher, a lover or a friend, there are certain aspects that our hearts recognize and pull us toward.

It’s kind of like taking your dog on a walk, and meeting another friendly dog on the trail, you are pulled strongly by the leash toward this new friend. In the case of saints, the leash is invisible, but reliable.

Holy Influencers

As a former protestant, it has taken me years to build personal relationships with Orthodox saints. Over time, I have grown to know and love some of the incredible personalities in our panoply of holy ‘Influencers’.

Saint John, Saint Anna, Saint Seraphim, Saint Amphilochios, Eldress Macrina, and of course, the Panagia (Theotokos) Mother of God. But it is Saint Gavrilia who has pierced my heart in a way that has been life changing.

Saint Gavrilia lived her wild life as a holy adventure! Traveling throughout India, Palestine, Europe, the Middle East and North America ministering to people’s minds, bodies and souls along the way, with no money or hesitation.

Saint Gavrilia approached each person she met with pure Love and no judgement. To her, everyone was 100%: a precious Child of God, beloved.

I travel to Leros a couple times a year now, a day’s boat trip from Patmos, to honor Saint Gavrilia. My heart is drawn to visit her, and her spiritual daughter, Aspasia. Both are now dears friends, just on different sides of that fine illusory line of life … death …. and life eternal.

Sharing our spiritual lives

This Sunday I will be speaking on The Language of God is Silence, with a Regional gathering of Axia women who are based in the Pacific Northwest. I love inviting women to share their spiritual lives with their sisters in conversation.

Speaking with a close group of like-minded seekers is a rare and wonderful occasion. How often does someone ask you to share what is percolating deep in your soul? What can we glean from hearing tidbits of our sisters’ and brothers’ prayer lives? Why is it so uncommon to delve into the sanctuary of personal, spiritual growth?

As part of my own preparation to lead contemplative prayer pilgrimages to Greece and here in the United States, I realized that I should talk less and allow more time for each pilgrim to talk more. This, in line with Saint John the Baptist’s wise words: “He must increase, but I must decrease.”

Ask questions like Jesus

One day I did a little research, then bought 3 books about leading group discussions. My favorite of these, How to Ask Great Questions1, showed me how to really dig in to the heart level, by guiding discussions, building relationships, and deepening faith. Author Karen Lee-Thorp spoke of how Jesus could propel people into new ways of thinking, with simple, powerful questions, like:

“Who do you say that I am?”

“Do you want to get well?”

“What do you want me to do for you?”

Saint Gavrilia must have been like that too. People, young and old, would pour into her days, taking turns to tell her their serious problems, ask her advice on what to do next, or simply sit with her and absorb the joy and acceptance of her endless love.

Gathering together with a close friend over tea … in a small living room group for stillness and prayer … or on zoom from faraway places, are all intimate ways to build faith, when approached with intention.

In our upcoming Axia Women’s Pacific Northwest gathering, in our next ‘Saint Gavrilia’s Circle of Light’ event on July 11, or wherever people like you and me choose to gather with other seekers of spiritual growth, God is in our midst.

Questions to approach Saint Gavrilia

In these times together, we can learn from saints and each other, as we explore questions close to our hearts. Even if you can’t attend just now, feel free to dive in, and ask yourself or consider in your journaling life:

“What does the ‘Ascetic of Love’ mean to you?”

“In what ways do you identify with Saint Gavrilia?”

“Tell about one of your favorite stories from her life.”

“What is one way Saint Gavrilia has influenced your life?”

“What are your favorite words or phrases that she uses?”

If you haven’t read the new editions of the The Ascetic of Love2 and the Light and Joy of Saint Gavrilia3, you are truly missing a rare and wonderful new treasure in the world of faith. You can get them at SeaSalt Books, or on my Etsy store. And you don’t need to travel or zoom or leave your cozy room, if you don’t want to!

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Q: See above ;

Spark: Pull out that dusty journal and enjoy your own private pilgrimage.

Resources:

{ our daughter, a new mother, and her sweet, beloved family }

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God’s Fervant Love

God loves each one of us so fervently, as our Creator, and our Giver of all good gifts. We humans parent our children the best we can, but God is pure Love, with all the Fatherly and Motherly attributes of the Holy.

We all want to be loved.

As a Mother myself, I am so blessed when my children want to be with me … from their pure love for me, not out of obligation. Even in their busy lives, if we can sit together for a few minutes without agenda, or share a lingering meal. These days, even a text message to know they’re thinking of me affirms our Parent-Child connection.

This is the kind of love that I imagine God must feel for me, and a heartfelt reason that I encourage those in my circles toward stillness in prayer.

Aligned with our human way of experiencing parental love, we often associate ideal Mother-love as guiding our lives with tender, compassionate, nurturing daily interactions. Sometimes the association we have with problematic Fathers can injure our view of God as Father. At the same time, ideal Father-love can be unconditional, protective, instructive, and providing, in ways that are distinct from Mother-love. All is in God’s design for us earthlings.

The loving Father-Mother God that I know desires that we yearn to be together … not out of obligation, not only to complete our rote assignment of prayers from the lips that do not pierce our hearts. No. Although, all prayers honor Him, and connect us to our Source, in different ways.

Showing up for a few minutes of stillness every day is a great way to love God by simply BEING with God.

Our priest shared this quote from Saint John Chrysostom, during one of his homilies.

None of the human relationships with which we are familiar can help us understand the magnitude and the measure of Christ’s love for mankind. As St. John Chrysostom says: “You have a Lord who is more affectionate than a father, more loving than a mother, who loves you with a passionate love greater than that between a groom and his bride. One who finds His peace in your salvation … and One who shows every kind of love … God’s affection is incomprehensible, His goodness is inexpressible and His loving-kindness unfathomable.

If we want to know about the insatiable love that God has shown us, let us hear what He Himself said by the Prophet’s mouth: Will a woman forget her child, so as not to have compassion upon the offspring of her womb? But if a woman should even forget these, yet I shall not forget you, says the Lord. (Is. 49:15) God said this in order to prove that His love for us is more fervent than all other affections.”1

Julian of Norwich

The 14th century English mystic, Julian of Norwich, writes from her experience of the maternal side of God in her classic work, Revelations of Divine Love.

We received our ‘Being’ from Him and this is where His Maternity starts. And with it comes the gentle protection and Guard of Love which will never ceases to surround us.

Just as God is our Father, so God is also our Mother.2

And we all know…

How often would I have gathered your children together as a hen gathers her brood under her wings, and you would not! (Mt 23:37 Lk 13:34, 2 Esdras 1:30)

Our God offers us the most unwavering, non-judgemental, unconditional love imaginable. One simple way to feel this love is sit with Him … listen to His voice of stillness … BE with Him in our hearts.

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Q: How do you feel God’s love?

Spark: Simply sit and BE with God.

Resources:

{ driving through a small village in France last summer }

Attentiveness to shades of green

Every time I get in the car, I have a choice of doing three things.

I can turn on the radio.

Let my mind wonder aimlessly over concerns of the day.

Or I can say the Jesus Prayer.

My home is in the country and I have densely forested roads to drive through in order to get to town. So driving can be another kind of forest bathing, nature therapy, or contemplative act of worship. Wherever we find ourselves, we can be aware of the gifts God has given us in neighborhoods or in nature, thanking the Giver along our way, on the road.

We may be driving past a millions shades of green leaves, a chain of intentionally painted houses, or on a freeway that connects us from one community of God’s children to another. There is mystery, creation, and life abounding in all directions.

Jesus Prayer: Fixed and Free

Bishop Kallistos often speaks of the ‘Fixed’ and the ‘Free’ ways of contemplative prayer. Whether we are setting aside time at home to offer our hearts in stillness to God (fixed way), or driving down the road (free way, haha!) we can deepen our practice of prayer. Ultimately, we work on our own inner transformation, which has the potential to offer a modicum of peace to the world, even as it passes by into our rear view mirror.

In The Power of the Name, Kallistos reminds us of this way of peace.

‘Acquire inner peace,’ said St Seraphim of Sarov, ‘and thousands around you will find their salvation.’ By standing in Christ’s presence even for no more than a few moments of each day, invoking his Name, we deepen and transform all the remaining moments of the day, rendering ourselves available to others, effective and creative, in a way that we could not otherwise be. And if we also use the Prayer in a ‘free’ manner throughout the day, this enables us to ‘set the divine seal on the world’.1

Whether you are using the Jesus Prayer, or your Sacred Word, or quieting your mind with deep breathing … what a gift to be able to ‘set the divine seal on the world!’

Ease your pace…

However, driving doesn’t always feel divine.

As I found myself speeding to Church Sunday morning, I suddenly put my foot on the brake and eased my pace down to the speed limit.

The night before, I had been preparing a double batch of bechamel sauce for the moussaka I would serve for our ‘Supper for 6’ group from Church (which had grown to 15). And I was running behind for the 10 am liturgy.

Suddenly, the question arose in my mind, “Am I trying to get to church on time to honor God, or to not be seen as arriving late by the people who had arrived on time?”

I realized that God would probably rather I drove safely, noticed the blossoming trees I was passing along the road, and kept my heart rate beating in it’s optimum rythmn. Oddly, I find, there’s a peace that comes with driving the speed limit, akin to the peace of feeling myself within the will of God. I don’t have to worry about speed traps or squirrels in the road, I can just relax and drive along.

To be honest, I have a hard time driving the speed limit, or doing just about anything in my very full life, without rushing. (Remember, this substack is called, ‘be still … contemplative prayer for busy people’). Emphasis on busy.

Maybe that’s one reason I’m so attracted to simply BEING with God in stillness. The rest of my life often creates a whirling hurricane. If I pay attention, I can find that still, small voice in the center. That calm, low-pressure place of safety and peace. Maybe you are drawn to stillness as a respite from busyness, too?

Saying the Jesus Prayer is a natural companion to driving. Seems to feel better when not driving too fast.

In a way, it seems funny to think of loving God by driving the speed limit. But then again, Acts 17:28 reminds us that a way of life is possible where, ‘In him we live and move and have our being’. ‘Move’, as in driving down the road a 55 mph (or something close to it).

Do everything for the sake of Christ

Saint Seraphim of Sarov speaks of the WHY of choosing the Good, in his potent little book, The Aim of Christian Life.

I tell you, Lover of God: fasting, vigils, prayer, chastity and all other good deeds done for the sake of Christ, however good they are, do not alone constitute the aim of our Christian life. We were not born merely to do this. The aim of our life is to understand what doing good deeds for Christ really means: it is that grace of the Holy Spirit which these works bring us and, obtaining and acquiring it (achieved through them), that alone is the aim of Christian life.

Notice however that only good deeds done for the sake of Christ bring forth the fruit of the Holy Spirit, since the Holy Spirit came into the world for the sake of Christ.

Everything, even though good and done for what is called good, but not for the sake of Christ, does not bring us the blessing of the Holy Spirit. Nevertheless such good deeds, because of their essential goodness, are pleasing to God. Everyone who loves God and does what is right is pleasing to Him. So, as is said, ‘Love God’, and not just goodness alone. 2

Ad so as we see, driving, just as washing dishes, moving in and out of sleep, and walking down the road, can be a way of remembering God throughout your day. A way of loving God and neighbor through simple daily acts.

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Q: Do you have ways of remembering God while driving down the road?

Spark: When your thoughts or media feel heavy in the car, switch them off, and say your favorite contemplative prayer for a few minutes … refreshing!

Resources:

These are two of my very favorite slim little books on prayer and peace, which I import in bulk from England to offer on my Etsy store. Let me know if you have other favorites!

{ contemplative prayer retreat at mount angel abbey in 2022 }

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You know that feeling of anticipation … you can’t wait to be with someone you love, soon?

That is one of the first FLAVORS OF JOY that contemplative prayer retreats can bring. This is two-fold, like the cross … joy for the chance to BE with God more intimately (vertical), and joy for the occasion to BE with new spiritual friends (horizontal).

How often are we offered this chance to surround ourselves with love, in stillness? And to gather new tools to bring this simple (but not easy!) practice into our daily life, more and more?

Another FLAVOR OF JOY is the simple act of getting to be a sheep. Following. Learning to listen to the voice of God, which is silence.

“My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me.” (John 10:27)

This beautiful practice of silence in contemplative prayer is a gift. It is not easy to do, in this fast-paced world, but when we grow in this practice, more and more, there is a peace that our heart begins to recognize, seek, and find. There’s no way to explain it in words. It must be experienced.

Contemplative prayer retreats offer surprises - another fun FLAVOR OF JOY!

On our recent Myrrhbearing Maidens’ retreat, the girls learned a practice they hadn’t known of before, taught by Saint Gavrilia. Contemplative Prayer Writing. This was one of her ways of using her body (her fingers!) in the service of prayer. Her fountain pen too.

Anticipation to BE with … following the Good Shepherd … surprise ways to pray. 3 ways to discover joy in spiritual retreat.

There is a bonus joy that comes to us as we learn to practice and share the hidden treasures of our faith. Becoming the flavor, the spark.

“You are the salt of the earth …You are the light of the world.” (Matthew 5:13, 14)

When the flavor of the world seems tasteless, we can become Salt for those around us. When things seem dim, we can remember that we are called to be Light in the world.

Just this morning, recalling my deep desire to be light in the world, turned my feelings from worry to joy. Good things are happening! Let’s join together to nurture our inner resources, and light up the world with HOLY JOY! And with joy, comes peace, as we elevate our personal level of practicing the presence, of BEING with God.

As the beloved, glowing Saint Seraphim of Sarov reminds us (while forest bathing with his bear friend, Misha), “Acquire the Spirit of Peace, and thousands around you will be saved.”

I’m with him.

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Q: Have you ever had the chance to grow your practice of stillness in contemplative retreat?

Spark: Check your calendar, and sign up for one of these upcoming opportunities, below.

Resources:

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“The Language of God is Silence”: St. Gavrilia’s Life of Prayer
Sunday, May 17th, 7pm Pacific
Open to all Orthodox women in the Pacific Northwest
Online via zoom, here: Axia Women Gathering

Connect with Orthodox women in the Pacific Northwest seeking a deep life of faith! In our first-ever regional gathering, we’ll hear from Contemplative Prayer Practitioner Jennifer Anna Rich, author of the Substack ‘be still ... contemplative prayer for busy people’, and co-founder of the St. Gavrilia Circle of Light. Jennifer has led pilgrimages to Greece to introduce Orthodox women to St. Gavrilia - one of them with Axia in 2024!

St. Gavrilia was known as the “Ascetic of Love,” but her teachings also offer us much wisdom on the life-giving relationship between prayer and silence. Join us in a rich time of conversation together, and have a chance to meet Orthodox women from many jurisdictions across the Pacific Northwest!

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Silent Prayer Retreat and the Jesus Prayer: 4 Peaceful Days at the Abbey

with Jennifer Anna Rich and Fr. Anselm Flores, OSB, May 26 – 29, 2026

Open to all. Register here: Mount Angel Abbey Retreat

The Holy Spirit indwells within each of us, and to grow in increasing awareness of the Spirit’s presence is one of the great joys of Christian life, and a great gift of God’s mercy. Join us for a guided retreat focused on silent prayer, the Jesus prayer, and the practice of lectio divina. These are ways encouraged by the tradition to maintain an awareness of God’s work in our lives.

{ So proud of these girls each year, serving in their liturgical roles at Pascha }

Underground Movement: Holy Flame

This is one of the scariest parts of being a Myrrhbearing Maiden … the midnight procession, walking elbows linked, down the center aisle toward the altar, right after the lights go out … in darkness.

In Darkness, the girls encircle the Royal Doors, which then burst open to reveal the Light from the priest’s candle, lit within the Holy altar. This light is shared with everyone in the room. A phenomenon that reverberates in every single Orthodox Church around the world — thousands upon thousands of churches, all alight with Holy Flame at midnight.

This is Pascha. An underground movement of Bright Holiness.

Not all Orthodox Churches have a Myrrhbearing Maidens ministry, but for those who do, this is the most exciting moment for the girls.

The Light wins

Ushering in the Light of Christ every year. The Darkness doesn’t stand a chance…

In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. He was in the beginning with God; all things were made through him, and without him was not anything made that was made. In him was life, and the life was the light of men. The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

~ John 1:1-5 (from the Prologue, Saint John’s Paschal Hymn)

I’ve been dwelling in this Prologue of Saint John’s Gospel lately. It’s a heart-mending work, to memorize these verses. Like a call and response to faith, in the midst of crushing world events.

Pairs nicely with the glorious Paschal proclamation, chanted boldly at midnight as the priest lights the Myrrhbearing Maidens candles, two by two.

Come receive the Light from the Light…

That is never overtaken by night…

And glorify Christ, Who is risen from the dead!

Aligning ourselves as Light

Those Royal Doors, from which we receive the Light, face East, according to Tradition. But Why?

Bishop Kallistos writes about aligning ourselves with the Cosmos in prayer. He says,

Prayer is not simply an individual or even a corporate activity but a cosmic act. We align ourselves with the direction of the world, the direction of the cosmos … All the fathers ask us therefore to face east when we pray, though they don’t all give the same reason for this. Origen says we face east in the direction of sunrise because in praying we are facing the rising of the true light which is Christ. 1

In prayer, we receive Light, we dwell in Light, we care for each other and the cosmos with Light. So many ways to pray … so many ways to bring Light into the world.

Let us all align as little lights, shining in the darkness. There are a million ways to do it.

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Q: How have thought about being Light in the world, but not yet acted?

Spark: Be a spark … even a tiny one, in your days on earth.

Resources: Short sensory taste of the Paschal Light, piercing the darkness, in this 2-minute video of His Eminence Archbishop Elpidophoros of America, in Greek then English:

Come Receive the Light!