The world measures success and growth mostly by material things, how much you have in your account, the level of wealth you’ve accumulated, the things you own. I’m not against material thingsss 😂😭 don’t worry I like them.

But there’s a kind of growth and success that isn’t loud or visible, the kind people tend to ignore or overlook. Well, that’s my favourite kind of growth. The kind where you remember where you’ve come from, smile at yourself, and your heart gets excited because you realise, “Wow, look how far I’ve come.”

We don’t share these kinds of growth often, but I think they are the ones that should be celebrated the most. They form a major part of who we are and even though we may not always realise how important they are, we should share and celebrate them as much as we can.

Sometimes, turn off the music and drop your phone. Stay off social media, turn off the movie and sit down quietly and reflect on what the journey has been like. Look in between the lines and notice the growth and the success. You’re too busy comparing your life with other people’s lives, consuming hours of social media, seeing flashy things and measuring your life against a standard that was never meant to define you.

To the person who has broken free from an addiction they once struggled with, share the story. Celebrate the victory because It could inspire someone else. Who knows? You might even write a book about it someday.

To the person who has learnt to get a hold of their emotions and refuses to let them control how they respond to situations or relate with people, that’s a huge one. Pat yourself on the back.

To the person who hardly went to church before but is now a dedicated church worker, that’s really admirable.

To the person who has been able to cut down on sugar for over five years and now eats healthier, that’s a huge success. I want to be like you when I grow up. 😭

And to the video editor or graphic designer, you know your first work wasn’t as grand as what you create now. Somewhere along the way, you improved your skills. You learnt patience with clients. You learnt discipline and how to deliver on time.

Look back and celebrate how far you’ve come.

Personally, one of my favourite kinds of growth I’ve experienced one that isn’t particularly loud is learning how to sit with a thought until it becomes a full-blown article.

Most times, I don’t just wake up and write.

I sit with a particular thought for hours, sometimes weeks, until it evolves into a beautiful piece that you’re reading.

Before, I didn’t know I could sit with a thought for that long and allow ideas to flow simply by pondering on them. I’m grateful for that growth.

Another area where I’ve experienced growth is in having a community and being an active member of one. Oh, I used to say, “I don’t like people. I like my space. People this, people that.” 😂 But today, I’m part of different communities not just as a member, but actively working, contributing and showing up. And those communities have shaped me in ways I can’t even fully explain. 😭 Beautiful, extraordinary ways.

So now, I want you to look at your life and take a survey of your growth and success.

Not just the things that can be measured.

Look at the things nobody sees.

The habits you’ve changed, battles you’ve overcome, the discipline you’ve developed. The relationships you’ve learnt to handle better, skills you’ve built and the person you’re becoming.

Celebrate yourself.

Because growth doesn’t always look like a bigger bank account, a new job, a degree, a house or a car.

Sometimes, growth is simply being able to look at the person you used to be and smile because you know you’re no longer there.

Your life doesn’t end until you die.

Until then, you are constantly transitioning. Every season you leave behind is simply preparing you for the one ahead. What we often call an ending is usually just the beginning of another chapter. Life isn’t made up of finish lines; it’s made up of transitions.

We often find comfort in telling ourselves, “Once I get through this, I’ll finally rest.” We imagine certain milestones as finish lines, believing life will somehow become easier after we cross them.

But we’ve been sold that illusion.

They told us Common Entrance was the hardest exam we’d ever write. So we stayed up late, studied with everything we had and believed that once we got into secondary school, we’d made it. Then secondary school introduced us to difficult subjects, endless assignments and examinations that demanded even more from us.

Then came WAEC. We read until our eyes hurt because we didn’t want to be the one rewriting papers while our friends moved ahead. We thought, “Once WAEC is over, I’ll finally breathe.”

Then university happened.

You quickly discovered that university wasn’t High School Musical. It wasn’t a place where everything magically worked out after one big performance. It came with deadlines, difficult lecturers, sleepless nights, disappointments, growth and lessons no classroom could fully prepare you for.

And after university? The real world welcomed you with another set of challenges like careers, finances, relationships, purpose, family and countless decisions that no exam timetable could prepare you for.

Life is not a series of endings. It is a series of transitions.

A caterpillar doesn’t simply end its life. It enters a cocoon and emerges as a butterfly. Every stage looks different, but each one is necessary. If the caterpillar had mistaken the cocoon for the end, it would never have experienced flight.

So it is with us.

Every season prepares us for the next. Every ending is simply God opening the door to another chapter. Some transitions are exciting, others are painful and many are uncertain. But they all move us forward.

The goal, then, isn’t to keep chasing an imaginary point where life finally becomes effortless. The goal is to become the kind of person who can grow through every transition.

Because nothing truly ends until your life does.

Until then, you’re always becoming.

There’s a popular saying in this generation: “A moving man will surely meet his luck.” Right now, it’s one of my favorite quotes.

I truly believe that movement is often rewarded.

Too many of us stay stagnant because we feel unprepared. We tell ourselves we need to know more, have more money, gain more experience or wait for the perfect time. The truth is, luck rarely finds the stagnant.

Movement creates exposure. Exposure creates opportunities. Opportunities create momentum.

So by all means, keep moving.

Keep showing up.
Keep applying.
Keep creating.
Keep learning.
Keep trying.

Will you be afraid? Probably.

Will you have doubts? Definitely.

Should you stop because of them? Absolutely not.

Take the risk. Learn the lesson. Adjust your approach. Then keep moving.

You have a crazy idea? Maybe it’s time to bet on it.

Don’t spend your entire life trying to play it safe. Some of the greatest opportunities you’ll ever experience are on the other side of taking a chance.

Will it be difficult? Maybe.

Can you do it? Absolutely.

I’d rather live a life where I tried, failed, learned and tried again than one where I never moved at all because I was waiting for certainty.

So wake up.

Move.

Your luck may just be waiting for you on the road, not at the place where you’ve chosen to remain.

It’s my mid-year Thanksgiving and this time I’m especially grateful for the little things we often overlook because they seem insignificant or simply because we don’t slow down enough to notice them.

My heart is so full, so I’m going to share a few. And before you say, “I don’t have anything to thank God for,” remember that the things we call “little” are often some of God’s greatest gifts.

✨ I’m grateful that I can pick up my phone and call the people I love whenever I miss them or simply want to hear their voice. 🥹

✨ I’m grateful that my body does so many things without me having to think about them, like breathing. Imagine if we had to consciously remember to breathe every second. I would definitely forget. 😭

✨ I’m grateful for NEPA/AEDC. We rarely appreciate electricity until there’s a 48-hour blackout and suddenly realize how much of our lives depends on it.

✨ I’m grateful that I can go to church at least twice a week and freely hear God’s Word. There are still people who have never heard the Gospel. If you can, share Jesus with someone today. 🤍

✨ I’m grateful for inDrive. Not only do I have a means of getting around, but I also get to choose my fare and decide what works for me.

✨ I’m grateful for devotionals. (And by the way, Joanna has written THREE devotional series! I’m still blown away—I actually know a YouVersion devotional writer! 🥹) I’m all for studying the Bible personally, but devotionals provide structure and help us explore specific topics in a way that’s practical and easier to follow.

✨ I’m grateful for my unpaid Spotify. 😂 I can replay sermons at my own pace, go back to something that blessed me days ago, and meditate on God’s Word all over again.

✨ I’m grateful that I can smell nice. 😩 God really did something with fragrance. That feeling when someone asks, “What perfume are you wearing?” Ahhh… you just know you’re smelling expensive. 😂

✨ I’m grateful for gas cookers. In just a few minutes, my food is ready, and I can control the heat. Imagine if every meal meant gathering firewood or lighting charcoal from scratch. Whew!

✨ I’m grateful that when I sleep, my mind gets to rest. And somehow, when my alarm goes off or it’s simply time to wake up my body responds. That’s such a gift.

These things and so many more are gifts from God.

As the days go by, they can begin to feel ordinary, expected, or even like they’re guaranteed. But they’re not.

Take a moment today to pause and reflect. You may discover that life is far more beautiful than you realized when you choose to see it through the lens of gratitude.

So, what are you grateful for today?

“I’m a lone ranger.”

“I’m not a people person.”

“People have shown me shege.”

“I’m the shy type.”

“I’d rather be alone.”

These phrases, and many more, seem to be trending. People have become so carried away by them that they don’t see the harm in them anymore. They almost sound like the right way to live.

One hill I’ll always stand on is this: life was never designed for us to do it alone. We all need a community in one way or another. A friend of mine always says, “When the devil wants to destroy your life, he first isolates you. He removes you from community and from the people around you.” And honestly, I see exactly what she means.

Someone offends you in church, and suddenly you stop going. A friend hurts you, and you decide you’ll never let anyone get close again. One bad experience becomes the reason you shut everyone out. Don’t get me wrong, I understand hurt, betrayal and people just being plain wicked. I’ve genuinely been through all of that and by God’s grace, I’ve healed. You can heal too.

I’ve realized there’s far more to gain in community than in isolation.

I used to believe there was nothing wrong with doing life alone and that all I needed was myself. Looking back now, I realize how limited that mindset was. As I’ve grown in life and in faith, I’ve experienced the beauty and the blessing of genuine community, and I can’t recommend it enough.

My academic community was just three of us, one close friend and one regular classmate. We shared the same vision, and they constantly challenged me to stay on top of my game. We celebrated wins together, pushed one another and became better because we weren’t doing it alone.

My church community, TPCM (Tribe Petra Campus Mission), is the student arm of my church. Through that community, I’ve found prayer partners, built life-giving friendships, received prophetic words that have come to pass and grown so much spiritually.

Then there’s YWAP (Youth With A Purpose), a non-denominational, faith-based youth organization committed to raising a generation for Christ. Through regular discipleship meetings, worship gatherings and fellowship, I’ve watched young people discover their gifts, serve on impactful projects, find brotherhood and sisterhood, and grow into who God has called them to be.

I’m part of different communities. In some, I’m very active. In others, I’m quietly serving behind the scenes. Some have stretched me, some have shaped me and through some, I’ve discovered purpose. There are even communities I was only meant to be part of for a season because life comes in phases.

In fact, there’s one community I recently applied to join. I even sent them an email… they’re yet to reply. 😪 Chai! Hot cake like me, they don’t know what they’re missing. 😂

But on a serious note, don’t let past hurts convince you that isolation is safer than connection. Set boundaries, absolutely but don’t close your heart to the possibility of healthy, life-giving community.

The right community will challenge you, pray with you, celebrate you, correct you, hold you accountable, and remind you of who God has called you to be when you forget.

And if you’re still saying, “I don’t need anybody,” I pray life doesn’t humble you the way it humbled me. 😂 Find your people. Join that group. Attend that meeting. Reply that message. Community may not always be convenient, but it is one of God’s greatest gifts to us. Trust me, doing life with the right people is far better than doing life alone.

Join or Start a community today whether it’s big or small. You never know how much your life can change because of the people God places around you.

Because sometimes, the answer to your prayer isn’t just a miracle,  it’s a community.

One Day at a Time, Sweet Jesus

“One day at a time, sweet Jesus, that’s all I’m asking from You.”

This song has been stuck in my head for a while now and I think it’s because it speaks to something many of us struggle with while navigating life, we want to see the entire picture.

We want certainty. We want answers. We want to skip the in-between and that is the very part that shapes us into who we’re becoming. Can we skip to the good part? (iykyk.)

We long to know how the story ends (I’m shaking my table 😭) . We crave the perfectly curated, happy-ever-after ending but perhaps the only perfect ending is the one that awaits us in eternity. Until then, there is beauty, growth and grace to be found in the middle chapters.

But with God, life is often one day at a time.

One step at a time.

I’m not saying you shouldn’t have big dreams or a clear vision for your future. Please, dream big, have goals and plans. Trust God for things greater than yourself but while the vision may be big, the journey is still lived in daily obedience and daily steps.

In my last article, I mentioned that I would share some things to do when you need a time of refreshing.

The first thing is this, go back to the place of prayer. Take a retreat if you need to and shut out the noise. Sometimes there are so many voices around us that we become confused about what God is saying and what everyone else is saying. So, intentionally create space for Him.

Spend time in His presence because it is in His presence that clarity comes. It is there that strength is renewed and answers are found. One of Min. Dunsin Oyekan’s songs says, “Those who will win must know how to bow before Him.” I think that’s such a powerful reminder. If we truly desire to win in life, we must know how to bow before the One who holds our lives in His hands. We must know how to sit at His feet in fellowship.

That is where direction comes from.

That is where wisdom comes from.

That is where refreshing begins.

When life starts to feel heavy, be sensitive enough to recognize when your soul needs refreshing. Understand when you’ve run low and need to return to the Source.

As I mentioned in my previous article, the world is constantly drawing from us. It demands our energy, our attention, our time, and our emotions. When we are empty, we cannot give our best to the things and people we love.

So maybe this season of life is not about having everything figured out.

Maybe it’s simply about trusting God enough to take the next step.

One day at a time.

We’re not rushing.

We may already have a vision of where we want to go or who we want to become, but we are choosing to be faithful with today’s assignment because the big picture is built through small, deliberate steps taken consistently over time.

Nobody wakes up one morning and magically arrives at their destination.

We get there by showing up every day.

By trusting every day.

By obeying every day.

So, wherever you are right now, start from there.

Take the step that is in front of you.

I love you.

“When the times of refreshing shall come from the presence of the Lord.”

Acts 3:19b (KJV)

In my last post, I mentioned being tired but if I’m being honest, weary is the better word. I was trying to stay afloat, yet deep down I knew I was sinking. Nothing particularly sad was happening. I’d take walks and pour my heart out to God. Sometimes, before sleep came, I’d cry. I wasn’t living life ,I was merely existing.

I was resting, so I knew a vacation wasn’t what I needed. I just couldn’t wrap my head around what was missing. I was unmotivated and the visions I once carried had become invisible, and I had no drive to do anything. Also, before anyone assumes I’d drifted from God, I was still having my devotions, still praying. That wasn’t the issue.

The honest truth I discovered was this: I simply needed a refreshing.

Let me explain it better.

Life is designed in such a way that you can’t start and finish with the same energy. Seasons of refreshing aren’t a luxury; they’re a necessity. I entered this year with visions, plans and clear words from God. I never expected things to feel this way so soon.

Think about Elijah. He was a man who did mighty things for God. On Mount Carmel, he stood against the prophets of Baal, and when the question hung in the air “Whose god is truly God?” Elijah prayed and fire fell from heaven, consuming the sacrifice. He spoke a word and the heavens withheld rain for years. Miracles followed him. Yet, after all those victories, something surprising happened.

When Jezebel threatened his life, Elijah became afraid. The same prophet who boldly confronted hundreds of false prophets ran into the wilderness exhausted, discouraged, ready to quit. What Elijah needed in that moment wasn’t another miracle or assignment. He needed refreshing from God.

A lot of us are living like Elijah. We keep running. We move from one responsibility to the next always doing, serving, producing but rarely pausing to be refreshed. Over time, ministry starts to feel like performance because inwardly we are running on empty and don’t even realize it.

God designed life in seasons and cycles. Just as the earth knows both sunshine and rain, He also ordained times of refreshing. These moments can’t be manufactured; they’re found only in His presence.

The Bible calls us earthen vessels that’s like clay pots. When water is poured into a clay pot without being replenished, it slowly seeps away through invisible pores. In the same way, our strength, joy, passion and peace gradually drain simply because we are human. We often don’t notice the depletion until we find ourselves weary and unable to see clearly. That’s exactly why we need refreshing.

My pastor once said the reward for good work is often more work. Life’s demands are relentless, and the road can wear you down. We shouldn’t just try to scrape by when our vision has become unclear. This journey has a way of dimming our light and if we aren’t careful, we can spend our days merely existing instead of truly living.

Times of refreshing are a recovery of breath. They’re moments of renewal. If we never learn this principle, we won’t know when to apply the brakes and simply rest in God’s presence. One of the most dangerous places to be is where your vision has blurred and your strength is slipping away without you even knowing.

God Himself promises, “I will refresh the weary and satisfy the faint” (Jeremiah 31:25).

Even the Apostle Paul needed refreshing. In 2 Timothy 1:16-18, he speaks of Onesiphorus, a man who often refreshed him and wasn’t ashamed of his chains. Great men and women of God aren’t sustained by strength alone; they’re sustained by times of refreshing.

There are still great things for us to do. We haven’t come this far for our vision to become unclear. Refreshing is found in God’s presence.

Success isn’t sustained by talent or opportunity alone. The currency of lasting impact is strength and clear sight (vision). If we stay with God longer than we stay with men, we’ll have the capacity to impact so many more people. When we wait on the Lord, fresh strength rises, our sight is restored, and our perspective changes.

God never intended for us to live exhausted. He intended for us to be refreshed.

So yeah, I will actually figure life out. Because in His presence, there’s always a refreshing and that’s exactly what I needed.

I’ll explain more fully what this refreshing is and how to walk in it in my next article. But for now, if you’re craving a refreshing yourself, I’m inviting you to the Rain Conference. All the details are on the flyer below

Mentally, physically, emotionally, financially… and honestly, every other sphere too. 😭

You know that feeling when you’re on the verge of breaking down, but you can’t because there are important things waiting for you? Life doesn’t pause, and you’re scared it’ll move on and leave you behind, so you keep showing up even when you’re exhausted.

I’ve experienced God’s peace before, so I know this is a passing phase. But honestly, can it pass a little quicker? 😭

I don’t even know the right word for what I’m feeling right now. I don’t know how to sit with this phase because I can’t fully describe it. But I’ve experienced God enough to know that He is faithful. I’ve seen Him come through before. I’ve watched Him carry me through seasons I thought would swallow me whole or what extremely overwhelming and somehow, He always made a way. So even though I’m tired, I’m holding on to the assurance that this season will not last forever.

On another note, I presented my project defense today. It honestly wasn’t bad. I just wish it had been better maybe even excellentbut oh well, it’s totally fine. To think I was so scared of presenting. I actually did well. Maybe because we presented while sitting down, so I wasn’t as tense as I expected.

Either way, I’m grateful it’s done, and I know I’ll be fine.

Here are some JPEGs to brighten your day. ✨🤍

I signed out from university this week and considering this is my second degree, you’d think I should have life figured out by now. Sadly, I’m nowhere close 😭.

Don’t get me wrong, it was beautiful celebrating such a milestone with family and friends. I had an amazing time. But now that the celebrations have died down and I’m lying in bed, I can’t help but wonder… what exactly am I going to do with my life?

Law school isn’t until next year, about seven months from now, so that’s on hold. I can’t officially travel for a master’s yet. What if I don’t even want to go to law school? 😭

Is there a magical job somewhere that pays well, lets me start immediately, and helps me discover my life’s purpose before those seven months are up? 😂

I can’t even do NYSC yet because it would clash with law school, and apparently I can’t be in two places at once or do the two at the same time.

Maybe I should meet a man within these seven months, start talking, start dating and somehow get married? 😂😭

Or should I restart my jewelry business and focus on building capital?

Or should I just… exist? 😭

Am I putting too much pressure on myself, or am I asking the right questions?

And while we’re here, am I wrong for feeling a little weird that some people saw my sign-out pictures, people I consider friends or acquaintances that are close and didn’t say congratulations or even acknowledge it? Part of me was like, “Hmm… jealousy? Weird behavior? They don’t care?”

But then again, I have pending congratulation messages I haven’t responded to 😪.

Anyway, I think I’ll turn this into a “Figuring Out Life After Graduation” series or something.

Until then, I’m open to your advice.

I have loud friends, quiet friends and those beautifully in-between. Over the years, I’ve learned to accommodate them, to understand them and to love them especially when I consider their different temperaments.

I’m not perfect, but I try my best to love people as they are.

There was a time I was in a relationship where I felt like I was doing too much. At some point, I was even made to feel that way. It went on for a while, until I took it to God in prayer. In that place of honesty, I realized something important, I wasn’t made this way by accident. This is who I am, not too much, not excessive just but enough. Enough in the eyes of my Creator and that realization gave me peace.

I’ve encountered overbearing people, those who want to talk when I just need quiet, or be in my space when I need solitude. It may genuinely feel overwhelming sometimes, but I’ve learned not to make anyone feel bad for being themselves around me.

Then there are my quiet friends, the ones who can say two words in two hours, yet we sit together in complete understanding. No pressure, just presence and I’ve learned to adapt to that too.

But in all of this, I’ve learned something even more important, while it’s beautiful to love people as they are, it’s equally important to set boundaries. Don’t lose yourself trying to accommodate everyone else.

When the high-energy, talkative friend shows up and you don’t have the capacity to match it, it’s okay to say so kindly. When the quiet friend is holding back and you need to communicate more, it’s okay to ask gently.

Balance is key. Because love is not just about accepting others, it’s also about honoring yourself. The healthiest relationships are the ones where both can exist freely, without pressure, without guilt, and without losing who they are.

At the end of the day, you are allowed to be fully yourself just as you allow others to be.

Ps: “Imagine a world full of only quiet people how boring it would be or only loud people, how exhausting it would be; our differences are what make life beautiful, so embrace your uniqueness.

Most times, I want to speak on a topic whether in a conversation or in my writing but I become cautious. I fear that I may not have enough knowledge, or that someone else knows more than I do. What if they ask a hard question and I can’t answer? What if they share their views and I suddenly realize how wrong I am? After asking myself these questions, I often choose silence.

Recently, I’ve been learning that I won’t know everything about some topics and that’s okay. I’m learning to share the little I know. The little I think I know or the small ideas I want to share, may be completely new to someone else. There are people who have no idea about the things I hesitate to speak on.

I’m beginning to understand that growth doesn’t come from silence. It comes from speaking up, and being willing to learn out loud. Every time I choose to share, I stretch myself a little. Every time I choose not to, I stay exactly where I am. I don’t want fear to keep deciding for me anymore. I want curiosity to lead and courage to follow.

I should share the little I know even when I don’t feel confident enough to do so. Maybe I’ll be corrected or I’ll realize I was wrong and that’s okay too. I shouldn’t be afraid or ashamed of knowing little or too worried to contribute what I know.

I’ve come to day 10 of my writing challenge and it’s beautiful to see what is possible when you put your mind to something and challenge yourself. Ten days may seem small to some but this milestone holds a special place in my heart. Thank you for going on this journey with me.

If you had told me I would be able to write for nine consecutive days, I would have doubted myself. But here I am, showing up day after day. I show up tired, unmotivated, unenthusiastic, sleepy and exhausted after a long day and I still drop newsletters 🥹.

When I started, I was scared it wouldn’t work out or that I wouldn’t be able to continue. I kept asking myself, Where will I even get ideas to write for 10 days?

Me, who could go months without writing because I “had no ideas.” And yet, here I am, writing daily and already on day 9.

This should be a charge to both you and me in other aspects of life. As the Nike motto says: just do it. You don’t have to be perfect or the best, you just have to start. The time you claim to be unprepared will pass anyway, and you can’t get it back. So start. You’ll make adjustments along the way and get corrected. Maybe, you’ll realize it’s not the path you want and choose another one. Either way, the earlier, the better.

This personal writing challenge has made me realize how unstoppable I am once I set my mind to something. It has taught me not to give up easily and has shown me that many of the excuses I made about “not knowing what to write” were really just excuses and I wasn’t trying hard enough.

I encourage you to set realistic timelines maybe 5 days or 10 days like mine. If you can do more, that’s amazing and I’ll be rooting for you. Show up even when you don’t feel like it, because sometimes our feelings are the very things holding us back from reaching our full potential and becoming who we’re meant to be.

Today, I almost cried.

I went to the hospital really early so I could see the doctors and still make it in time for my lectures. I woke up as early as 5 a.m., got ready and left the hostel. Even though I met quite a queue at the hospital, it was organized, so the process wasn’t too tedious.

I also saw my dad at the hospital and I was so excited. He came for his routine checkup and to run some tests. Since I’m on campus, I don’t get to see him often. Then he gave me some cash 🥹, the joy of free money! With all the excitement from seeing him, the money and the queue moving steadily, I felt really good.

Then it got to my turn.

This female doctor made me feel stupid 😭. I honestly wanted to step out and request another doctor, but I’m not one to cause a scene or speak up in that way. After explaining how I felt, she kept insisting that I just needed a massage and that what I was suggesting couldn’t be the cause. 😭 Can at least a test be done? I’m the one paying, not you.

She did a brief examination and dismissed almost everything I said, even after I told her I had already taken painkillers and that I felt it was more than a massage, especially since massages hadn’t worked. 😩 She went ahead to prescribe drugs I had already used, plus one new one. She should honestly just pray the drugs work and I feel some relief, because if not, she’ll definitely see me again next week.

What really broke me was hearing another patient explain her issues to her doctor. She talked about having spiritual attacks through her dreams, only for the doctor to say she would be taken to the mental ward 😭. I couldn’t help but think about how many people who aren’t mad or mentally ill are casually labeled as such just because their experiences aren’t understood? Sometimes, all you need is empathy or even honesty that you can’t handle certain matters and tell the patient

Moments like this remind me how fragile trust in healthcare can be. When doctors stop listening, patients start feeling invisible, small and powerless. Nigeria’s healthcare system truly breaks my heart. I can only pray that God grants us sound health, because no one should dread seeking help when they’re already vulnerable.

Yahweh responds, ‘But how could a loving mother forget her nursing child and not deeply love the one she bore? Even if there is a mother who forgets her child, I could never, no never, forget you.’

Isaiah 49:15

‘Can’t you see? I have carved your name on the palms of my hands! Your walls are always my concern.’

Isaiah 49:16

It’s high time we stop reading the Scriptures like a newspaper or a mere novel and start treating them for what they truly are God’s love letter to us. I came across these verses today, and they felt like a warm hug to my soul.

My name is literally carved on God’s palm. Imagine it like a tattoo that is always there, never fading. Water, soap, time, or circumstances cannot erase it. It is permanent. In that moment, God gently reminded me that He will never, ever leave me.

Sometimes we forget just how close God is. He isn’t distant or detached from our lives; He is deeply involved and intentionally present. These verses remind us that we are constantly on His mind, cherished beyond measure and held with unwavering love.

So when we feel overwhelmed, lonely, or unsure, we can bank on His promises and rely on Him completely. Knowing that we are remembered, seen, and loved this deeply brings such a calming, restful peace. What a truly relaxing feeling.

If you ask me why I write, I could give you a plain answer and say, “Oh, because I love writing” or “because I love expressing myself” which sounds cliché. The honest truth is, I don’t always love writing. Sometimes I’m careful not to share too much while still trying to pass across a message. Sometimes writing requires real thinking. It’s not always about picking up a pen and having words flow effortlessly. Sometimes it takes days to finish a single article and some drafts never get published because they don’t feel good enough, deep enough, or fully formed.

I love writing because I love sharing experiences so people can learn from them or simply feel less alone. I like writing because of the compliments I get. Today, two girls in my university casually told me they read my Substack and if you saw the way I was blushing… whether it was true or not, at least they know I’m a writer.

I write because I’ve seen how my words have helped people in addressing issues they can’t speak about, meeting emotional needs and comforting them with the knowledge that they’re not the only ones going through certain things. I write because people have told me how encouraging my newsletters are, and honestly, it’s beautiful to receive such feedback.

I write for my unborn children and future generations who will one day look back, gain insight from my words and feel inspired. I write because I feel better and smarter when I do. I write personal letters to friends and family to remind them how much they mean to me and how blessed I am to have them in my life and each of those letters puts a smile on their faces and makes my heart melt.

I write because I don’t think singing or dancing are part of my talents 😂. I write because some gifts don’t just belong to us, they are meant to be shared. Beyond all of this, I write because I believe it’s a gift from God. If you’re ever confused about why you do something, ask yourself why you’re doing it and don’t be afraid of the answer.

Because sometimes, your reason is your purpose.

I’ve come to a place in my life where I truly believe that nothing happens by chance. Nothing is merely coincidental. As I’ve grown in faith, I’ve become more aware of God’s intentionality concerning me and my life.

Scripture tells us that God knows the number of hairs on our heads and that He knew us while we were being formed in our mothers’ wombs. These are verses I’ve heard and recited since childhood. I’ve listened to sermons built around them. But there’s a difference between knowing Scripture and having light come to it. When understanding finally settles in, you’re amazed, “Isn’t this the same verse I’ve always known?” Yet now, it feels personal.

God’s intentionality goes far beyond the good, nice, fairy-tale moments. Even in difficult seasons, I’ve learned that I still matter deeply to Him. In times of testing, instead of feeling overwhelmed or exhausted like I used to, I’m reminded that God is still intentional about me. From the phone I currently use, to the school I attend, my roommates, the church I worship in, the business I handle, friendships that ended, friendships that were rebuilt, through all these things and more God has been intentional. With God, there is always what I like to call the bigger picture.

The experiences we go through, the roles we play and the seasons we endure are not just for the now. Often, the dots don’t connect immediately and that can be frustrating but one truth remains: God is still intentional about you.

Let me share a personal example.

I stayed at home for about three to four years before entering the university, while most of my mates were already close to graduating or serving. At the time, it felt deeply unfair. I felt behind, like life had moved on without me. That season broke me a little.

Looking back now, I’m about to graduate with my second degree, having studied two degrees simultaneously. God provided every single school fee. Even when one of my schools increased its fees by almost 100%, He still made a way. Till today, it remains a mystery to me. In my wildest dreams, I never imagined my parents could afford such fees not for one university, let alone two. By God’s grace, I never missed an exam or a test because my fees weren’t paid.

During those years I stayed at home, I couldn’t imagine my parents paying even half of one school’s fees. Thinking about what could have happened still amazes me. These experiences and many others have taught me that even in delay, God is intentional. While I was worried, discouraged, and questioning myself, God was simply saying, “Wait. You can’t see the bigger picture yet.”

So today, I want to encourage you.

Things may not look as rosy as you hoped. They may not make sense right now or even soon. But please remember this: God is intentional about you and He cares for you far more than you realize.

You should definitely listen to the words of this song. It feels like a warm hug 🫂😩

Only the TikTok or meme OG’s will find this funny 🤭

“Yakubu Manage!”

You will feel it like you want to d*e but you will not d*e is that clear?

I love the concept of Valentine’s Day. I love love seeing people in love express themselves and proudly post their partners. I love the shock on people’s faces when they see posts of couples they didn’t even know were dating.

I also love the fact that, although it’s popularly seen as a day for couples, people don’t limit the celebration to just that. Church members show love and exchange gifts, people post their friends and family and talk about how much they mean to them and honestly, that’s such a beautiful tradition. Some girls even have what they call Galentines and it’s so cute 🥹.

I love the business opportunities Valentine’s brings restaurants, surprise vendors, gift packages, all of it. I love the look on people’s faces when they receive something they’ve always wanted or a thoughtful gift. Just imagining the joy in their hearts is so heart-warming to watch.

I also enjoy seeing the decorations in office buildings, schools, and restaurants all dressed in the theme of love. Sometimes I catch myself wondering who came up with the design, why they chose it and how much the contractor was paid. I know it’s none of my business but I genuinely can’t help thinking about these things 😭.

My Valentine’s Day was better than I expected. I felt loved, seen and I’m so grateful. I started my day by washing a whole goat 🤭. Guess who got goat meat for Valentine’s Day? Meeee. I also got cake and fried rice because my friend cooks and bakes. I also got a skincare product too. All of that, plus the little “Happy Valentine’s” messages, truly made my day.

To top it all off, I got a random order for five Valentine packages. It was last minute and I had to go shopping at night, but it was absolutely worth it and I’m grateful.

My fellow singles… how was your Valentine’s? 💌

As I’ve grown in faith, one of the areas that has stood out to me as needing adjustment is my emotions. While I’m not yet a master, there are certain things that have helped me grow.

Although I may not be able to totally control all my emotions, since some are greatly influenced by things like hormones, I’ve become much better at managing them. Three major ways I manage my emotions are:

• How long I stay in an emotion

• How I respond to it

• What I choose to do because of it

Think of it this way, emotions are like waves 🌊. You can’t stop the wave from coming, but you can learn how to surf instead of drowning.

One thing faith has taught me is that emotions are signals, not commanders. They deserve to be acknowledged, but they don’t get to make the final decisions. Growth, for me, has looked like pausing, praying and choosing wisdom over impulse even when it’s uncomfortable. And little by little, that practice has brought more peace, clarity, and emotional maturity.

It’s honestly not easy to always choose pausing and patience but the Holy Spirit has been my helper nudging me to slow down, to listen and to respond with wisdom instead of impulse. I’m learning that waiting isn’t weakness, it’s strength being trained.

“He who is slow to anger is better and more honorable than the mighty [soldier], And he who rules and controls his own spirit, than he who captures a city.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭16‬:‭32‬ ‭AMP‬‬

I graduate from university in 4 months and I genuinely don’t know what to do with my life 😭.

Hi, my name is Gift Nanchin Gushem, but you can call me Kyauta (which means gift in Hausa). I’m currently in my 500 level, second semester, officially my last semester in university. I’m studying Law (and no, I don’t like the course my dad made me do it and with the help of God, I’ve come this far).

This is actually my second degree (International Studies was the first), so you’d think, “Oh wow, that’s amazing, you should be proud.” I wish having two degrees was the answer to my problems. Honestly, I don’t want to go to Law School. It just feels like a waste of one year. Of course, if I go, I’ll study hard, make my parents proud, and be proud of myself, but still.

If I had a strong passion or was certain about the path I wanted to take, making life decisions would be so much easier 😭. I know life is more than just to graduate in June, wait till next year for Law School and just be… waiting 😭. And please don’t tell me to look for law firms to intern with while I wait, because I might actually beat you and then report you to my mummy.

I don’t regret studying the two courses. I just wish I knew where to channel them, especially withoutgoing to Law School 😭.

Maybe I should do a master’s degree while I wait for Law School. Maybe I should get married but who is chasing me from my father’s house, abeg? Plus all these men outside… marry ke? How much do I even have? So that somebody’s son will now say, “I’m feeding you” or “what do you bring to the table?” 😂😭

I also can’t survive off my jewelry business right now. She’s still a baby. It’s not like I have enough capital or a strong customer base to say I’ll skip Law School and go into it full-time. I need to be realistic because this is Nigeria and my parents won’t even think I’m serious.

All these thoughts and many more come from time to time.

One thing I know for sure is that God has never failed me and He won’t start now. I’ll look back at this post months from now with clarity and gratitude, wondering why I was ever so worried 😂. Until another time my lovely readers.

As the first daughter in an African home, everyone expects you to know how to cook. They don’t care whether you love it or not, it’s just assumed. Luckily for me, my father’s second daughter lovescooking, so I’ve managed to escape a bit. I handle most of the cleaning in the house while she hardly does any and that feels like a fair trade to me 🤭.

Sadly, I don’t always have her around because we’re in different universities and our calendars rarely align 😭. So during my recent two-week break from uni, I challenged myself and somehow made the best three meals of my life.

I made a pot of jollof rice that everyone enjoyed. I made yam porridge twice and they couldn’t get enough of it (sadly, I didn’t snap pictures). Lastly, I made the fluffiest pancakes in the world and it was my first time making them completely on my own. I got compliments that made me blush, smile, and feel genuinely proud of myself.

What no one saw was the self-doubt while I was cooking. I prayed before, during, and after, hoping the food would turn out nice and that no one would complain 😩. I consulted people, checked social media posts, followed recipes I had written down, and double-checked everything while cooking.

Honestly, it was a difficult process especially with jollof. Not knowing how many tomatoes or peppers were blended from online videos, how many cups of rice were used, whether it was better to parboil the rice or cook it directly… all of it wanted to confuse me. But I’m glad I didn’t let the confusion overwhelm me and in the end, it turned out well.

I still don’t love cooking, but I’m glad I can now make about three to four solid meals on my own. I know that at my age, some people can make 100 different soups, 20 types of rice and 200 pastries but here I am, just starting at 25 😂. But I’m not competing with anyone.

This experience reminded me that growth doesn’t always come from passion, it sometimes comes from courage. I may never love cooking, but I showed up, tried, and learned anyway and maybe that’s enough for now. Progress, not perfection… and definitely no pressure.