Behind every number is a human being… A person with family, friends, a history, and a life that existed long before the government placed them in detention.

When someone dies in government custody, the first question should not be how quickly the government can move on.

It should be:

What happened to them?

Did they receive adequate medical care?

Was there an adequate emergency response?

Were their families informed?

Was the death independently investigated?

In nearly all instances, the answer is a resounding NO. People are going missing. People are being murdered.

And no one is being held accountable.

Why?

Because the victims are dehumanized and reduced to statistics. They are described as “illegals,” “detainees,” “deportees,” “cases,” or simply numbers. Many people even believe immigrants are “disposable.”

The irony here is a deep historical contradiction that most Americans are unwilling to confront: the United States was built through the displacement and dispossession of Indigenous peoples from their lands. Borders that we now treat as permanent and unquestionable were created through conquest, war, treaties, colonization, and political decisions.

The idea that someone becomes less deserving of dignity simply because they crossed an imaginary line is something we should seriously question.

People have always moved.

People have always crossed borders.

Read more

When I arrived, I was preoccupied with the ordinary questions that come with moving somewhere new: where I would live, who I would meet, how I would find my way around, which coffee shops would become my favorites, and what streets would eventually become familiar.

I didn’t realize, at first, how privileged those worries were.

I was thinking about how to make a new city feel like home while, all around me, people were fighting to remain in theirs. While I was learning the train lines and figuring out my neighborhood, other people were facing deportation, family separation, displacement, and violence.

The question of where I would belong was a question of comfort. For many of the people I would eventually meet, questions of home, safety, and belonging were matters of survival. It made me think differently about what “home” means, and how much of it is shaped by the people willing to stand beside you.

There is a particular feeling that comes from standing in a crowd of people who have decided, together, to fight injustice. You are surrounded by strangers, but for a few hours, you belong to one another.

Over time, these people become part of your understanding of home.

Chicago is home.

Protest is home.

Moving house is “home.”

This is what it feels like.

Moving House as Protest

You thought protest would feel loud, but mostly, it feels like waiting.

Waiting for speeches to end. Waiting for people to arrive. Waiting for the light to change so thousands of strangers can cross the street together. Waiting to find out whether today will remain a march or become something else.

Over the last year, you march against deportations, ICE, terror, and an administration determined to turn fear into policy. You learn that chanting has a rhythm your body remembers long after your voice gives out.

You also learn how quickly a crowd can change.

One minute, you’re talking with the person beside you about where to get coffee afterward. The next, you watch police rush forward. You see the person you’ve been marching beside knocked to the ground, beaten before you can understand what is happening. For a moment, the entire protest narrows to a single body on the pavement.

You always imagined courage as something cinematic.

Instead, it is ordinary. It is people locking arms even when they’re scared. Someone calling for a medic. Someone else filming because memory is fragile and video isn’t. It is strangers moving toward one another when they could run. It is refusing to leave someone behind.

It is texting Made it home? after every march because sometimes people disappear.

You move to a new city expecting to learn its streets.

Instead, you learn the routes people take toward one another.

You learn where they gather, where they wait, where they stand when they’re afraid.

And somewhere along the way, you learn that this can be a kind of home, too.

Globally, nearly one in three women have experienced physical or sexual violence in their lifetime, often at the hands of an intimate partner. What’s most disturbing isn’t just the scale of this violence, but how little it has changed. Over the past twenty years, these rates have remained virtually the same. This is not a problem we’ve failed to notice; it’s one we’ve learned to live with.

In the past year alone, approximately 316 million women experienced physical or sexual violence by an intimate partner. These are not abstract figures. They represent lives shaped by fear, injury, coercion, and long-term trauma—often unfolding in places that are supposed to be ‘safe.’

And violence against women doesn’t stop at physical boundaries.

Increasingly, it plays out online, where abuse has been normalized as the cost of visibility. More than 70% of women journalists, activists, and human rights defenders report experiencing digital abuse, including sexualized threats, coordinated harassment campaigns, doxxing, and intimidation. What happens online rarely stays there. Digital abuse frequently escalates into real-world stalking, assault, and silencing—forcing women to withdraw from public conversation, advocacy, and even their livelihoods.

I am one of these women. My phone number has been leaked. I’ve received death threats. There were moments when I was afraid to leave my home. I’ve been threatened with swatting—an act of violence in which armed law enforcement officers are sent to a civilian’s home under false pretenses. I have roughly 500,000 followers across social media. Imagine the risks for women with millions.

International efforts have attempted to rally support, encourage accountability, and inspire change. And yet, the overall scale of violence has barely shifted. One major reason is systemic underreporting. Survivors often face disbelief, retaliation, broken

Read more

Why, you may ask? Because she is no longer a natural resource to be mined and depleted. This woman is unextractable.

Patriarchal systems exist because of women’s labor— most of which much is unpaid, unrecognized, and exploited. Women are expected to give endlessly. From emotional labor to domestic work to caregiving to supporting mens’ ambitions, we are conditioned to put others before ourselves. We are forced to neglect our own needs and sacrifice our sanity in the name of everyone else’s success. This labor is framed as ‘love’ rather than work, which makes it a requirement for being a “good” mother, wife, or woman.

Globally, women perform roughly three-quarters of all unpaid care work. If this labor were counted like any other economic contribution, its value would be enormous. Estimates suggest that unpaid care and domestic work (done almost entirely by women) would be worth around $10 trillion annually, or over 10 percent of global GDP. In the United States alone, the estimated value of unpaid household and caregiving labor reaches well over a trillion dollars each year.

The patriarchy depends on this invisibility. Unpaid work is easier to exploit. “Natural” work is harder to challenge… although the pressure of parenthood almost never burdens in men in this way. (I wonder why…)

A woman who chooses herself disrupts this system. She refuses to give her time, energy, and care without consent and reciprocity. She does not confuse exhaustion with virtue or self-sacrifice with love. She recognizes that her emotional, physical, and intellectual labor has value, and she stops giving it away in exchange for society’s approval or the hope of being “chosen.”

This refusal is destabilizing.

When a woman chooses herself, she no longer runs herself into the ground just to be loved. She sets boundaries. She rests without apologizing. She demands fairness. In doing so, she exposes an uncomfortable truth: the system only works when women participate in their own depletion.

Read more

But there’s one part of U.S. foreign policy that’s rarely scrutinized by those on the right — our unrivaled financial and strategic support for Israel.

How Much Financial Support?

We’re talking billions. Since its founding, Israel has been the largest cumulative recipient of U.S. foreign aid, receiving more than $300 billion in total economic and military assistance.

Today, under a Memorandum of Understanding (MOU) signed by the U.S. and Israel, the United States provides $3.8 billion in annual military aid. Most of these funds are used to buy American weapons and defense systems, which are subsequently used to kill civilians around the world. Israel has bombed Palestine, Lebanon, Syria, Yemen, Qatar, and Iran — all with American taxpayer dollars.

Almost all of this aid is spent on the military. In 2023, about 99% of U.S. foreign assistance to Israel went to defense financing, not economic development or social programs. However, with this extra financial cushioning, Israel provides free healthcare and subsidized education to all citizens, while Americans debate whether they can afford an ambulance ride to the hospital.

Why Does This Matter?

Let’s put that Israel aid in context: $310 billion could have funded a universal healthcare system for millions of Americans. If universal healthcare was implemented, current analyses suggest potential savings of hundreds of billions of dollars and improved health outcomes. The average American would spend less on healthcare and more on goods and services — thus improving the economy and creating more jobs for the American people.

Education is another area that could use funding. For instance, a significant chunk of middle-class wealth goes toward student loans that many graduates carry into their 30s and 40s. Further, millions of Americans are drowning in debt for a variety of

Read more

This isn’t just anecdotal. It’s economic, and there’s evidence to support it.

A Surcharge on Womanhood

Let’s begin with the so-called “pink tax”—not an actual tax, but a term that aptly captures the quiet, persistent financial penalty imposed on women simply for being women. It refers to the inflated prices attached to products and services marketed specifically to women, despite being virtually identical to those marketed to men.

A 2015 study conducted by New York City’s Department of Consumer Affairs examined nearly 800 products across multiple categories. The findings were stark: on average, women were paying 7% more than men for comparable items.

• Shampoo? More expensive.

• Razors? Pricier.

• Dry cleaning a blouse versus a button-down shirt? The blouse costs more.

• A pink toy scooter versus a blue one? Same product. Different price.

When compounded over a lifetime, this seemingly minor price discrepancy amounts to thousands of dollars spent unnecessarily—all because of color-coded marketing and gendered assumptions. In effect, womanhood carries its own built-in surcharge.

The Cost of Looking “Presentable”

There’s a social contract, often unspoken, that women must look polished—especially in professional spaces. But looking “polished” isn't free.

A 2021 study by SkinStore estimated the average woman spends $300,000 on her appearance over her lifetime. And that doesn’t include clothing or hair.

Meanwhile, a man who puts on a clean shirt and combs his hair is considered “well-groomed.” Women are expected to do full skincare, makeup, blowouts, and dress for the occasion—lest we be called “tired,” “sloppy,” or “unprofessional.”

And let’s not even start on the time cost. Every minute spent contouring and curling could be spent sleeping, reading, or emailing that client back.

Periods Are Expensive

Now, consider the recurring and unavoidable cost of menstruation.

• Monthly supplies—pads, tampons, or liners: $10–$20

• Pain relief, heating pads, or medical appointments: varies significantly

• Replacing stained clothing or undergarments: inevitable

• Sustainable alternatives—such as period underwear or menstrual cups: costly upfront

• And in many states, where menstrual products are still subject to sales tax, the burden increases.

Over the course of her life, the average woman will experience approximately 450 menstrual cycles, with the estimated lifetime cost of period-related expenses ranging from $6,000 to $10,000—a figure that excludes lost productivity, missed work, or the emotional toll of managing symptoms.

The cumulative expense—financial, physical, and emotional—is substantial. Yet despite this reality, many schools, workplaces, and public institutions continue to treat menstrual products as optional, offering no access to free supplies or support.

In a society that still hesitates to speak openly about menstruation, the cost remains both literal and symbolic: an essential biological function treated as a personal inconvenience—rather than a public health matter deserving of dignity and access.

The Motherhood Penalty

One of the more sobering truths about gender inequality lies in what economists call the motherhood penalty—a term that describes the sharp decline in women’s earnings after becoming mothers. In stark contrast, men often experience a “fatherhood bonus,” with their income trajectories increasing post-parenthood.

According to the Institute for Fiscal Studies, women’s earnings drop by as much as 44% following the birth of a child—and that gap can persist for more than a decade. The

Read more

Understanding Fascism and Hegemonic Dominance

Fascism, historically, is a far-right, authoritarian ‘ultranationalist’ ideology that seeks to centralize power, suppress dissent, and elevate a singular national identity above all else. It is often marked by an embrace of dictatorial leadership, the rejection of liberal democracy, and the use of propaganda to unite people under a common cause—often by scapegoating minority groups.

To understand the potential rise of fascism in the US, it’s useful to consider the concept of hegemony. Hegemony, in this context, refers to the dominance of one group’s ideology, culture, or political power over others. In 2025, the US is witnessing an ideological battle where the ruling elite seeks to consolidate power, often undermining democratic processes and stoking divisions within society to maintain control.

Key Indicators: The Hallmarks of Fascism

Fascist movements are characterized by several key features. Let’s explore some of them to see if these traits are emerging in the current US political climate.

1. Authoritarian Leadership
   Fascism thrives on centralized power and a strong leader who embodies the state’s ideals. In recent years, American politics has seen the rise of leaders who openly challenge democratic norms, disregard institutional checks and balances, and wield power in increasingly unchecked ways (ie: Donald Trump). However, the influence of such figures extends beyond individual politicians, as power is being consolidated through the influence of big business, tech oligarchs, the media, and lobbying groups.

2. The Erosion of Democratic Institutions
   A hallmark of fascism is the systematic dismantling of democratic institutions. This can be seen in attacks on the judiciary, attempts to suppress voting rights, and the growing influence of corporate interests in political decision-making. The US has witnessed efforts to limit access to voting through restrictive laws and districting, signaling an attempt to shape electoral outcomes rather than ensuring a fair democratic process.

3. Cult of Nationalism
   Nationalism is often manipulated to create a unifying, but exclusionary, national identity. In recent years, American politics has become increasingly polarized, with rhetoric surrounding national identity becoming more aggressive and divisive. There is a growing tendency to label political opponents as “un-American,” fostering a climate of us-versus-them. This kind of nationalism can lead to the scapegoating of minority groups, such as immigrants, racial minorities, and political dissidents (as we are seeing now).

Read more

The School Dress Code: A Lesson in Shame

As women, many of us remember the first time we were told our clothing choices were “inappropriate” or “distracting.” It starts in middle school, where the dress code enforces a narrow standard of modesty, punishing girls for wearing anything deemed “too revealing” or “too sexy,” even when the clothing itself is appropriate. These dress codes, which disproportionately target young girls and women, reinforce the idea that our bodies are inherently shameful and must be hidden or controlled. The message is clear: our bodies are not our own… Instead, they are governed by the patriarchy— subject to criticism and control at the whim of men.

The first time I was dress-coded, I was 12 and told that my shorts were “too tight.” Despite being able to “pinch an inch” of the knee-length fabric, I was forced to either cover up or go home. As an adolescent with a naturally shapely body, I immediately felt ashamed of how my legs and behind looked. This was just the first of many uncomfortable moments, where, despite my modesty, I was critiqued and belittled by staff members twice my age.

My story is far from unique. Young girls are often punished for things beyond their control—like developing breasts, curves, or a fuller figure. Unfortunately, the trauma these rules create doesn’t end when we leave school. Instead, their effects linger throughout our lives, reinforcing the harmful belief that a woman’s worth is tied to her appearance, and that her body must be contained and hidden in order to earn respect.

The Growing Pressure to Conform

As girls grow into women, we face immense pressure to look perfect or risk being cast aside as “unattractive,” “lazy,” or “undesirable.” Media, fashion, and advertising continuously bombard women with an idealized image of what they should look like: thin, toned, tall, and conventionally “beautiful.” Any deviation from this standard is viewed as unacceptable.

We are told to diet, exercise, and do whatever it takes to achieve this prescribed image, or else we’re unworthy. The shame around our bodies is omnipresent, slowly eroding our self-worth and leaving us feeling inadequate. Our grandmothers and mothers pass down their wisdom and experiences, reinforcing the same message: if you don’t conform to rigid beauty standards, your ‘value’ will diminish.

The "Mom Bod" and Pregnancy

This policing continues with motherhood, where women are expected to bounce back to their pre-pregnancy bodies quickly after childbirth. . Society often demands that women maintain a slim, toned figure, regardless of the physical demands of pregnancy or motherhood. We are told we must balance raising children, working, and keeping our bodies in check. The “mom bod” is rarely embraced unless it fits into a narrow lens of perfection. Any weight gained during pregnancy or after childbirth is often met with criticism and body-shaming.

Even more insidious is the policing of a woman’s body during pregnancy itself. Society has its own ideal image of what a pregnant woman should look like—glowing, slim, and perfectly poised. The intense pressure to meet these expectations often leads to feelings of guilt and shame, as if carrying a child—one of the most physically demanding and life-changing experiences—isn’t enough on its own.

The Intersectionality of Body Policing

While the societal pressures we face as women are harmful to all, these issues are disproportionately felt by Black women and women of color. The beauty standards imposed on women of color are not only Eurocentric but rooted in racism.

Read more

My Experience with Stigma

My mental health journey has been arduous, but certainly worth it. I first visited a psychiatrist in the spring of 2023 after a bout with depression so intense that it nearly caused me to lose my sense of self. But even then, I wasn’t ready to accept that I was ‘mentally ill,’ largely due to the stigma surrounding mental health.

Almost a full year later, in January of 2024, I began seeing a therapist named Mia. She was a wonderful woman with long blonde hair and a website that said she was “LGBTQ-friendly.” She had experience working with young people who had experienced trauma, and although I was terrified, I slowly began to open up to her. Shortly after starting therapy, I was prescribed Lexapro, and my life gradually began to improve.

As I write this in February 2025, I feel like a completely different person—more optimistic, more compassionate, and more like myself. I feel closer to the whimsical child that has existed within me all along— the one who’s been fighting to break free. Last summer, I began sharing my experiences online, hoping to inspire others to seek mental healthcare.

Unfortunately, with that openness came backlash. It’s not uncommon for people to use my diagnosis against me, dismissing my work and my voice simply because I’ve been honest about my mental health.

In my comments and DMs, I’ve been told things like, “Why should I listen to you when you’re crazy?” or “You’re sick in the head. No one should take advice from you.” These hurtful comments are a disheartening reflection of how deeply embedded mental health stigma is in our society. There is a common, misguided belief that if you have a diagnosis, you’re somehow less credible, less worthy, or less capable. But here’s the thing: I’m not ashamed of my journey. In fact, I’m incredibly proud of what I’ve overcome, and I hope that my story helps other people know that LIFE CAN GET BETTER. It doesn’t have to feel so difficult and hazy all the time.

Living with mental health challenges is not a weakness—it’s a part of who I am, just as much as my strengths, my passions, and my resilience. Talking about mental health experience isn’t a sign of failure; it’s a symbol of courage. If anything, it’s made me more qualified to speak on subjects like self-care, mental well-being, and overcoming adversity because I’ve lived it.

Changing the Narrative Around Mental Health

We need to change the narrative around mental health. It’s just as valid as any other physical health concern, and the stigma that surrounds it only perpetuates the isolation and shame that so many people already feel. When someone is diagnosed with a chronic physical illness, no one bats an eye if they take medication or seek treatment. But when it comes to mental health, the same understanding isn’t always there. We’re often told to “just get over it” or “snap out of it,” as though willpower alone can erase the complexities of the human mind.

But the truth is, for many of us, managing mental health requires just as much, if not more, effort. Medication, therapy, lifestyle changes—these are all part of the equation. I’m not ashamed of needing Lexapro to keep my mind steady. I’m not ashamed of the work I’ve done to combat my OCD and depression. These treatments are part of my story, and they don’t disqualify me from sharing my voice, my creativity, or my experiences with others.

The Importance of Treatment

Seeking treatment for mental health is one of the most important steps you can take toward healing. Just like physical health, mental health requires attention and care—and sometimes professional support. If you’re struggling, I encourage you to reach out to someone. Treatment doesn’t just mean taking medication (though for many, it can be an essential part of the journey); it can also involve therapy, lifestyle changes, and community support.

If you’re worried about cost, there are options available at various price points. Low-cost options include community mental health centers, sliding-scale therapists, and online resources like BetterHelp or Talkspace, which offer affordable counseling via text, phone, or video. Many universities also offer counseling services at reduced rates (or free services, as I was blessed to access through Brown University’s teleheath program). For higher-end care, private therapists and psychiatrists can provide more tailored support, though they may be more expensive. Many insurance plans now

Read more

Feminism: A Brief Refresher

At its core, feminism is the belief in social, political, and economic equality of the sexes. It’s not about hating men or advocating for female dominance—though such misconceptions persist. Rather, feminism seeks to challenge and dismantle the systems of power that have historically placed men in positions of privilege over women.

In the United States, feminism’s roots stretch back to the suffragette movements of the early 20th century, with waves of activism that secured voting rights, reproductive freedoms, and workplace protections. But modern feminism, particularly in the 21st century, has grown far beyond these milestones. It’s no longer just about women; it’s a movement for gender equality in all its forms, encompassing a broad spectrum of issues, identities, and experiences.

The Changing Landscape of Feminism

Modern feminism is defined by its inclusivity. It recognizes that gender is not binary, and that gender identity is complex. Transgender rights, non-binary recognition, and the intersectionality of race, class, sexuality, and ability are all critical elements of today's feminist dialogue.

But perhaps more importantly, modern feminism is about recognizing that gender inequality doesn’t just manifest in obvious ways, such as unequal pay or lack of political representation. It’s also about the subtler, systemic ways in which gender-based expectations limit all people. For example, the societal pressure on men to conform to stereotypical masculine behaviors is part of this larger conversation—modern feminism advocates for the freedom to express one's authentic self, irrespective of gender.

Intersectionality: The Heart of Modern Feminism

One of the defining features of modern feminism is its focus on intersectionality. Coined by Kimberlé Crenshaw in the late 1980s, intersectionality refers to the idea that various forms of oppression (based on race, gender, class, sexuality, etc.) intersect and cannot be understood in isolation. For instance, a Black woman may face different challenges than a white woman, not just because of her gender but also because of her race.

In practice, intersectional feminism acknowledges that no single narrative can capture the diverse experiences of people across different cultures and backgrounds. For example, the struggles faced by a working-class woman of color differ vastly from those of an affluent white woman, even though both experience sexism. The goal of modern feminism is to amplify all voices, especially those that have been historically marginalized.

Why Modern Feminism Matters

1. Gender Inequality Still Exists.

   Though we’ve made great strides, gender inequality is far from eradicated. According to the World Economic Forum, the gender gap in economic participation is still significant. Women continue to earn less than men, and they're underrepresented in leadership roles. These gaps are even wider for women of color and LGBTQ+ individuals.

2. Feminism Benefits Everyone

   Modern feminism is about challenging rigid gender roles that limit people regardless of their gender. For men, this means breaking free from the pressure to conform to toxic masculinity—whether it's the expectation to be stoic, financially dominant, or emotionally restrained. When we challenge these norms, everyone benefits: men can embrace vulnerability, women can be empowered to pursue careers without judgment, and non-binary people can express themselves freely.

3. Reproductive Rights Are Under Threat

   Despite progress in reproductive rights, the future remains uncertain. In many parts of the world, women are still fighting for the right to control their own bodies. In the United States, the reversal of Roe v. Wade reminds us that the battle for reproductive rights is ongoing. Modern feminism doesn’t just fight for access to reproductive healthcare; it supports the broader right for all people to make decisions about their bodies, their health, and their futures. While everyone has the right to their own religious beliefs, these beliefs should NEVER dictate or influence the laws of the United States (as they are doing now).

Read more

What Is Propaganda, Anyway?

At its core, propaganda is biased or misleading information that’s created to promote a specific agenda — whether political, commercial, or ideological. It’s not just about spreading lies; sometimes, it’s about selectively presenting facts, distorting reality, or manipulating your emotions to achieve a desired outcome. It can appear in many forms: news articles, social media posts, advertisements, speeches, or even memes. In today’s media environment, it’s easy for misinformation to spread quickly.

The issue with propaganda is that it often operates under the radar. It doesn't necessarily make its intentions obvious. But once you know what to look for, you can start to spot it more easily.

1. Emotional Manipulation: Feel First, Think Later

One of the biggest red flags of propaganda is emotional manipulation. Propaganda isn’t just about presenting information — it’s about provoking a specific emotional response that leads to a certain action. Whether it’s fear, anger, outrage, or patriotism, emotional triggers are a powerful tool in persuading people to believe something without critically evaluating it.

Take, for example, the way certain political advertisements often exploit fear. In the 2024 U.S. Presidential Election, Trump’s campaign used fear tactics to sway voters. One ad might have featured ominous music and implied that the “other side” was dangerous and threatening to public safety. The goal wasn’t necessarily to discuss policies or facts; it was to make people feel fearful enough to vote against a perceived threat.

Social media platforms amplify this effect. Consider the viral spread of distressing or emotionally charged content — from Laken Riley’s murder to stories of immigrants that are “migrant criminals” or “illegal monsters”… (according to Donald Trump). These images are meant to stir up strong emotions, whether sadness, outrage, or helplessness. While these emotions are valid responses, propaganda uses them to shape opinions in ways that can be misleading or overly simplistic.

2. Us vs. Them: Oversimplified Narratives

Another hallmark of propaganda is the creation of a polarized, “us vs. them” narrative. This tactic simplifies complex issues into binary choices: good vs. evil, right vs. wrong, with little room for nuance or debate. Propaganda thrives on division because it makes it easier to rally people behind one side — while demonizing the other.

A contemporary example of this comes from the ongoing Russia-Ukraine war. Russian state media consistently portrays Ukraine as a puppet of Western powers and a threat to Russian sovereignty, using fear-mongering and nationalistic rhetoric. On the other side, Ukraine’s supporters, and much of Western media, emphasize the narrative of Ukraine as the victim of unprovoked aggression…

Russia’s binary framing doesn’t leave much room for questioning or deeper analysis. Instead of discussing the nuance of international relations, the conflict is reduced to a moralistic battle that encourages people to take sides.

Similarly, in recent years, the rise of political tribalism in the U.S. has led to an increasing us-vs-them narrative. Republican politicians and media outlets often frame debates as an existential struggle for “American values” or “freedom” against their political adversaries, leaving little room for healthy debate or compromise. This divisiveness isn’t just a byproduct of democracy — it’s a deliberate propaganda tactic that manipulates us into thinking in terms of enemies rather than collaborators.

3. Repetition…

Repetition is one of the most effective propaganda techniques. If you hear something often enough, you begin to accept it as true (even when it’s NOT). This technique doesn’t require convincing facts or solid logic; it just requires sticking with the message until it becomes embedded in your mind. The more you hear a phrase, the more it feels like common sense — even if it’s not true.

A great example of this is the rise of the term “fake news.” While the term originally referred to blatantly false stories, it quickly morphed into a weapon of propaganda. Political leaders, especially in the U.S., began using “fake news” to discredit any story that didn’t align with their views, despite the fact that much of the media they attacked was fact-based. Repeating this term over and over, even in the face of legitimate reporting, gradually changed public perception. The more the phrase was used, the more it shaped public skepticism of mainstream media.

Read more

In the following article, I will discuss how to recognize when someone is struggling, and more importantly, how to help.

The Stats: A Snapshot of the Crisis

Suicide is a complicated issue, influenced by various factors including mental illness, trauma, socio-economic stress, and lack of access to support. Here are some key statistics that highlight the scope of the problem:

• The highest rates are among middle-aged men (ages 45-64), but youth suicide rates have also been rising sharply, especially among teens and young adults.

• Veterans, particularly those who served in combat, have a notably high suicide rate.

• People living in rural areas are at an increased risk, potentially due to social isolation, limited mental health resources, and economic hardship.

• More than 40% of transgender individuals in the United States have attempted suicide.

• Suicide is the third leading cause of death for Black folks ages 10-24.

• Native American communities in the US consistently have the highest suicide rates of any demographic, due largely to "acculturation pressure and alienation.

These numbers are sobering, but they also reveal something crucial: Suicide affects everyone, regardless of age, gender, or background. But while the statistics can be overwhelming, they also offer us an opportunity to intervene—if we know what to look for.

How to Check In With Your Friends

When someone is struggling, a single check-in could be enough to help them feel seen, heard, and supported.

Here are some guidelines to help you approach those difficult discussions:

1. Ask Meaningful Questions
   Instead of the typical “How’s it going?”, try a more probing question like, “How have you been really feeling lately?” or “Has anything been weighing on you that you haven’t talked about?” These types of open-ended questions invite vulnerability and can lead to more honest conversations.

2. Be Open About Your Own Struggles
   Vulnerability is a powerful connector. When you share your own challenges or feelings of overwhelm, it can create a space for others to do the same. You might say, “I’ve been feeling really burnt out lately. Have you ever felt that way?”

3. Check In Regularly—Not Just When There’s a Crisis
   Checking in with people regularly, whether they’re doing well or not, can help prevent problems before they escalate. By maintaining consistent contact, you can normalize conversations about mental health and reduce stigma.

4. Let Them Know You’re There, No Matter What
   Sometimes, people aren’t ready to talk. And that’s okay. The most important thing is to let them know that you’re always there to listen, whenever they’re ready. A simple “I’m here for you if you ever need someone to talk to” can make a world of difference.

5. Follow Through
   If someone opens up about their mental health struggles, help them take practical steps toward support. Whether that’s encouraging therapy, reaching out to a family member, or even going with them to an appointment, your involvement can be a catalyst for meaningful change.

6. For Indirect Support, Consider the AFSP

   The American Foundation of Suicide Prevention is an organization that assists individuals impacted by suicide through empowerment, education, and fundraising. I'm raising money for the AFSP as a runner in the 2025 BofA Chicago Marathon, and you can donate here. The money I raise goes DIRECTLY to the AFSP and will fund scientific research, as well as support survivors of suicide and their families.

Important Warning Signs of Suicidal Ideation

Suicide is not always obvious, and many people who contemplate taking their life do so in silence. The key to prevention is recognizing the warning signs early on. Here are a few indicators that someone might be struggling more than they’re letting on:

• Withdrawal from Social Activities
  When someone starts pulling away from friends, family, or activities they once enjoyed, it can be a sign that they’re overwhelmed or feeling hopeless.

Read more

When I was 20 years old, a revelation emerged from the shadows of my family’s lineage: the horrifying truth that one of my closest relatives was a predator (or, at the very least, he had been one for decades).

I still remember the moment those words were spoken into my existence. It was a chilly November morning, and I was in the kitchen with my family; Thanksgiving was just days away, and grocery bags sat in the corner from my mother’s most recent trip to the store. I still remember the way the air smelled that day—like smoke and wet soil. It was an exceptionally cold afternoon in California, and I could smell the wood burning in my neighbor’s fire pit. As the grandfather clock ticked in our living room, my father cleared his throat and spoke the words that would change my reality forever.

“I’m sorry to tell you.”

“It’s not your fault,” we said. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”

The revelation shattered the carefully constructed image of my family, and by extension, my own sense of self. The person I thought I knew and trusted, the family I had relied on, all became unfamiliar. In the midst of this storm, I was left to piece together who I truly was—beyond the lies, beyond the shame, beyond the stories that had kept me tethered to a false reality.

The moment a traumatic truth is uncovered, there is an immediate rush to make sense of it, a desperate need to find a narrative that can explain the chaos. But in that initial fog, there is no clear path forward.

For me, the most profound challenge was confronting the reality of what had happened, of trying to understand how my relative could do such a horrific thing. How many victims were there? How long had he been acting with reckless disregard for human life? For human emotion? The person I had been—someone defined by trust and a sense of family—was suddenly at odds with the reality I now had to accept.

In the weeks and months that followed, I grappled with guilt, anger, disbelief, and confusion. How did my father, and so many others, live under the weight of this secret for so long? There were moments when I felt like I had lost my place in the world, where my entire childhood felt like a lie.

But through the pain, something unexpected began to emerge. Slowly, I realized that the process of unearthing the truth—painful as it was—offered me an opportunity for growth, forgiveness, and reinvention. It forced me to ask the essential question: Who am I, when much of my childhood was a masquerade to disguise my relative’s misdeeds?

In the absence of the narratives I had relied on, I started to uncover parts of myself that had been buried under layers of silence, shame, and denial. It wasn’t an easy journey. I had to wrestle with the parts of me that had been taught to stay quiet, to avoid confrontation, to keep the peace at any cost. And yet, in the silence of that truth, I began to hear my own voice—a voice that had been stifled by the weight of the family secret.

Finding my authentic self meant learning to trust my instincts, to validate my own experiences, and to rebuild my sense of worth from the ground up. I also learned to understand my family better— especially my parents, who during my childhood were often stressed, uptight, and angry. I love them dearly for protecting my sisters and me, and now that this horrible truth has come to light, I understand and appreciate my parents with a new fervor.

Suddenly everything made sense.

Why we moved so often during my childhood….Why I wasn’t allowed to sleep at anyone else’s house… Why time with extended family was limited…Why my parents were so strict growing up.

How exactly does one move forward after such a life-altering revelation?

Months later, I decided to find a therapist to help me untangle the complex web of emotions, guilt, and confusion that followed the discovery. My therapist (a lovely blonde woman named Mia) helped me create space for healing, and she guided me through the deep work of understanding and processing trauma, while also offering tools to rebuild a healthy sense of self. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) and trauma-informed practices gave me the language to express what I had long buried and the skills to navigate my pain without being consumed by it.

Read more

It turns out, waiting for life to "get better" is not only an unproductive mindset, it also goes against the very principles of mental health and well-being. There’s no magic moment when everything aligns perfectly. Instead, the key to true happiness lies in learning how to live fully in the present moment, even when life feels less than perfect.

The Science of Now: Why Present Moment Awareness Matters

There’s a growing body of research showing that our brains are wired to thrive when we focus on the present. In his book The Happiness Hypothesis, psychologist Jonathan Haidt describes how our minds constantly switch between two states: one focused on what-ifs (future anxieties) and the other on what-is (the present moment).

Unfortunately, when we spend too much time in the “what-ifs” zone, we lose our sense of well-being.

This is where mindfulness comes in. Studies show that regular mindfulness meditation—focusing on your breath, bodily sensations, or your surroundings without judgment—can literally change the structure of your brain. It increases the density of gray matter in regions responsible for learning, memory, and emotional regulation, while reducing the activity in areas tied to stress and anxiety.

In other words, the more you practice staying present, the more you teach your brain to let go of constant worry about the future, which in turn leads to increased happiness in the here and now.

Why We Wait for Life to Get Better: The Trap of “Someday”

But why do we fall into the trap of waiting? From an evolutionary standpoint, our brains are designed to be cautious in order to protect us from potential threats. However, this negativity bias can be exhausting as we are constantly searching for the “bad” rather than the “good” in our daily lives.

Further, this pessimistic mindset often keeps us stuck in the belief that happiness, fulfillment, or well-being is always just out of reach. We end up postponing joy, waiting for an ideal future moment when everything falls into place. The result? A never-ending cycle of dissatisfaction.

The Power of Small Wins

If you want to break free from waiting for life to “get better,” start by focusing on small wins. According to psychologist and author BJ Fogg, creating tiny habits that are easy to complete is one of the most effective ways to build a sense of accomplishment and momentum. This can apply to almost anything—whether it’s practicing five minutes of meditation, going for a short walk, or writing down one thing you’re grateful for each day.

Read more

- - - -

The connection between depression and binge eating is often a hidden struggle, one that can feel deeply isolating. For many, food becomes a temporary refuge—a way to numb emotional pain, bury unpleasant memories, or momentarily escape the heaviness of depression. Unfortunately, while binge eating may offer temporary relief, it typically exacerbates underlying negative emotions, creating a destructive cycle that can be difficult to break.

Understanding this cycle and how these two conditions are interconnected is the first step toward healing. In this article, we’ll explore the science behind depression and binge eating, and offer compassionate, practical steps to help you slowly break free from this pattern—one mindful step at a time.

The Vicious Cycle: How Depression Fuels Binge Eating

Binge eating is often a response to emotional distress, and for many, depression is the key trigger. People with depression experience profound emotional pain—feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and worthlessness—that can be difficult to cope with. For some, food becomes a means of self-soothing, a way to temporarily alleviate or numb these painful emotions.

1. Food as a Temporary Escape

When depression takes hold, the brain’s ability to experience pleasure or satisfaction from everyday activities can diminish. This lack of pleasure, known as anhedonia, can leave individuals feeling emotionally drained and disconnected. In these moments, food offers a quick and easy escape. Eating, particularly comfort foods high in sugar or fat, activates the brain’s reward system, triggering a release of dopamine—the "feel-good" chemical. This brief surge in pleasure can provide some momentary relief from the emotional numbness of depression.

However, this relief is short-lived. As the effects wear off, feelings of guilt, shame, or even self-loathing can quickly resurface, often fueling further emotional distress. And so, the cycle continues: eat for relief, experience guilt, feel worse, eat again.

2. Biological Factors: Depression and Reward Pathways

Research shows that both depression and binge eating are linked to disruptions in the brain’s reward and stress systems. In depression, the brain becomes less responsive to positive experiences, meaning everyday joys feel less satisfying. For those struggling with binge eating, this lack of emotional reward can lead to the search for a quick, temporary fix through food. Binge eating, with its rapid dopamine release, offers a short-term escape, but it ultimately reinforces the cycle of negative emotions.

Moreover, depression is often accompanied by heightened levels of stress and anxiety, which activate the body’s stress response system. As cortisol levels rise, the brain craves high-calorie foods to restore a sense of comfort. This biological push toward "comfort foods" further perpetuates the behavior, creating a self-reinforcing loop that becomes harder to break over time.

3. Stress, Cortisol, and Cravings

Chronic stress and elevated cortisol levels are common in depression and can also play a significant role in binge eating. Cortisol, the body's primary stress hormone, has been shown to increase cravings for high-calorie foods. These foods, often rich in sugar and fat, temporarily soothe the brain’s stress response and provide instant gratification, leading to repeated binge episodes.

This behavior can worsen depression, creating a loop that’s difficult to escape.

Slowly Breaking the Cycle: Steps to Heal from Binge Eating and Depression

Overcoming the cycle of binge eating and depression requires patience, self-compassion, and a focus on gradual, sustainable changes. Here are some strategies to help you start healing:

1. Track Your Emotional Triggers

The first step in breaking the binge eating cycle is understanding what triggers your emotional eating. For many, depression is a key driver, but specific emotions—such as loneliness, stress, or feelings of inadequacy—may also prompt the urge to binge.

• Keep an emotional eating journal. This can help identify patterns or specific triggers that set off binge episodes. (However, this strategy may cause some people to fixate on their diet, so please keep this in mind.)

• Pause and reflect. Before you eat, take a moment to ask yourself if you’re physically hungry or eating to cope with an emotional need. This brief pause can help interrupt automatic eating patterns and bring more awareness to your behavior.

By developing awareness of your triggers, you can begin to address the emotional causes behind your eating habits rather than simply reacting to them.

2. Practice Mindful Eating

Mindfulness is a powerful tool for breaking free from the cycle of binge eating. Instead of eating in a mindless, automatic way, mindful eating encourages you to fully engage with the experience of eating. This practice helps you reconnect with your body’s natural hunger cues and can prevent overeating.

• Eat slowly and savor your food. Focus on the taste, texture, and aroma of each bite. Eating more slowly allows your body to register fullness signals before you overeat.

• Listen to your body. Pay attention to physical hunger and satiety cues. Stop eating when you feel comfortably full, rather than when you’re stuffed or emotionally overwhelmed.

• Eliminate distractions. Avoid eating while watching TV or scrolling through your phone. Eating mindfully requires full attention, allowing you to tune into your body’s needs and respond more thoughtfully.

Mindful eating can help you make peace with food and reduce the impulse to binge, as it encourages a more balanced, attuned approach to eating.

Read more

- - - -

Three years ago and seemingly out of nowhere, my mental health began to deteriorate rapidly. For six months, things worsened until I was so depressed I could hardly get out of bed each morning. Then the fog lifted, and I emerged isolated, unhappy, and unhealthy.

Fast forward to today, I’m the happiest and healthiest I’ve ever been. I’ve built meaningful friendships, healed from past wounds, and shaped my body into something I’m proud of. The life I’m living now—one filled with joy, purpose, and self-love—would have felt unimaginable just two years ago. And perhaps most importantly, I no longer meet the clinical criteria for depression.

Now that I’ve taken the time to heal, I want to share exactly how I did so that you, too, can live a life of happiness and abundance.

In this series, Everything I Did to Cure My Depression, I’ll break down the tools and strategies that transformed my mental and physical health. What I’ll share is based on years of research—both academic (from my studies in behavioral science at Brown), professional guidance (from licensed therapists), and, most importantly, my own personal experience.

The Turning Point: Understanding Depression

For much of my life, depression felt like something that just happened to me. But it wasn’t until I started looking at mental illness through the lens of behavioral science that I began to understand it differently. Depression is not just about how we feel—it’s deeply connected to our thoughts, habits, and behaviors. It’s a result of our biology, environment, and the choices we make every day.

This realization gave me a sense of agency. Instead of feeling helpless, I started to see that I could do something about my depression. Small changes created drastic improvements in my wellbeing over time, and this knowledge was the first step in finding joy in this life.

A Holistic Approach to Healing

In this series, I’ll dive into four key areas that have been critical to my journey. They’re not quick fixes, but rather sustainable changes that have helped me rebuild my mental and physical well-being.

1. Mindfulness and Mental Training

   Mindfulness was a game-changer for me. I had always dismissed it, thinking it was too ‘boring’ or ‘complex.’ But when I began practicing mindfulness daily, it completely shifted my relationship with my thoughts—and with my depression. Mindfulness helps you stop ruminating, which often keeps you trapped in negative thought loops. I’ll walk you through how to practice it and why it’s so powerful.

2. Nutrition and Its Impact on Mental Health

   I didn’t truly understand how my body functions until I began exploring how diet affects mental health. The brain is an organ just like any other, and what we fuel it with matters. I’ll share what I learned about foods that boost mood and energy, and which ones can make depression worse. I’ll also talk about the changes I made to my own diet and the impact they had on my mental clarity and emotional well-being.

3. Physical Fitness as a Pillar of Wellness

   Exercise was never something I stuck with consistently. In fact, I used to believe I would never be “motivated enough” to be a regular runner, cyclist, gymgoer, etc. But once I incorporated regular physical activity into my life, I noticed immediate benefits to my mental health. Exercise releases endorphins and can even change the structure of your brain, making it easier to cope with stress and depression. I’ll share simple strategies that worked for me, even on the hardest days.

4. Building Healthy Social Habits

   Isolation is one of depression’s most damaging symptoms, and building healthy relationships is one of the most powerful ways to combat it. I’ll share how I nurtured healthy relationships, set boundaries, and distanced myself from toxic people. I’ll also explain how connecting with individuals who genuinely support your well-being can be transformative.

The Cumulative Power of Small Changes

Healing from depression isn’t about making dramatic changes all at once. It’s about small, cumulative shifts in behavior, mindset, and habits. Over time, these small adjustments build on each other, resulting in a more stable, positive outlook on life.

It’s important to note that there’s no one-size-fits-all solution to overcoming depression. What worked for me might not work for you in the exact same way—and that’s okay. The key is to find what works for you, and I provide multiple alternatives to each suggested action in this series. Through trial, error, and consistency, you’ll start to notice improvements. It may take time, but IT. IS. WORTH. IT. The time will pass anyway…. What do you have to lose?

A Journey, Not a Quick Fix

What I want to stress is that there’s no quick fix. Healing is a journey—one that requires patience, continuous learning, and growth. But every step forward, no matter how small, is progress.

In upcoming posts, I’ll dive deeper into each of the areas I’ve touched on here. I’ll

Read more