5 Things I Noticed at My Kid’s Swim Lesson.

Don’t worry - I’ll bring this back around…

1. The yellow starfish tiled into the bottom of the pool.

2. The mom who moved from sitting by the stairs to closer to the bathroom to plug in her laptop upon which she furiously typed. I tried to imagine what she was working on. Was she a lawyer, working to both be present at her daughter’s swim lesson and get her work done for an upcoming deal closing? Or maybe she owns her own business… is an HR director… a doctoral candidate… she could have been working on anything! But when the lesson ended she was the first to jump up and wrap her daughter up in a towel, praising her bravery and effort.

3. The other kid in my kid’s class who choked a little on water and subsequently threw up a little bit… right in front of the instructor holding him.

4. Said instructor who calmly pushed it away and kept encouraging him to swim.

5. How my own kiddo rose to the challenge of his new class into which he recently moved. This one reminded me of the fact that often, when challenged, many of us rise to the occasion. But there can be things that hold us back - and usually one of those things is namely: ourselves. There’s a yoga Sutra that says, essentially, ignorance is the root of all suffering and my point here becomes that if we don’t know WHY we’re resisting change or holding ourselves back then it’s pretty hard to do anything about it, don’t you think?

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My friend (and my own coach!) lists his “Change Choke Points: Ten Reasons We Resist Change” in his upcoming book, The Antihero Advantage (available for preorder!).1

Here is the list (but you have to go order the book to get the details and his context):

1. Fear of the unknown

2. Confusion

3. Mistrust

4. Complacency

5. Loss of control

6. Threat to status

7. Conflict with values

8. Self-doubt

9. Overwhelm

10. Negative past experiences

Before my little guy jumped into the pool he may have had some fear of the unknown, mistrust, or self-doubt. Nevertheless he persisted.

When I decided to move from Manhattan to Memphis there was a LOT of fear of the unknown, some mistrust, total loss of control, definite threat to status, self-doubt, and overwhelm. But I did it anyway.

When do you feel resistant to change? What cuts through it for you? I genuinely want to know! Comment below or drop me a note.

Thanks for reading.

With gratitude,

lv

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1

I was lucky enough to read it already and if you don’t go order it right after you finish reading this newsletter then you are doing yourself a serious disservice. (link above!)

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Hi! My name is Lauren - thanks for being here!

I’m a movement & mobility professional who helps active, motivated women move better and manage their stress through a personalized combination of movement, breath, and recovery.

As a former competitive soccer player who spent nearly two decades in the fast-paced fashion industry - and now a mom of two - I understand both the drive to keep pushing and the reality of fitting your own health into a full life.

I keep my work practical and science-backed. Together we look at what your body needs, what your life actually allows for, and where your effort will make the biggest difference so that you’re not constantly doing more without feeling better.

And if you’re not ready to dive into 1:1 or small group work, or prefer to go at it more independently - I also offer a few different options/resources to get started and familiar with my work - check it out here.

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Upcoming!

My friend and I are hosting an upcoming experience for women designed to connect with your body, calm your nervous system, and choose how you show up in your life. She is a therapist and we are bringing our worlds together for Feel it. Regulate it. Live it. The missing practice. More details coming soon, but if you want a first chance at a spot (we’re keeping it intentionally small!) then make sure you let us know!

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Stay Connected

If you’d like to follow along for updates, occasional personal reflections, practical tools, and the science behind strength, stress, movement, and recovery - make sure to subscribe here:

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And of course - please share with a friend:

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Thank you! 💜

Today we’re doing a little thought experiment…

Stay with me. I’m going to practice doing this unfiltered. Let’s see where we go.

• “I’m freaking out about turning 40.”

• “Why can’t I ‘bounce back’ after having kid(s)?!”

• “I want to be strong, but I don’t want to be bulky.”

• “It’s just a bunch of skinny women… I don’t want to go.”

A quick search told me that in the US there has been a 30% increase in interest in searches relating to “look younger” over the past 5 years and a ~375% increase since 2004! Another quick search told me, basically, this is due in part to front-facing cameras, social media and video conferencing. 😳 Makes sense, but I’m not sure what I was expecting instead.

Before I go down a rabbit hole with this, here’s my point - we (especially it seems, women) are very concerned with how we look as we get older. (My dudes, maybe you too? Maybe not? Maybe you don’t talk about it as much?)

Here’s my hot take: it is a privilege to get older, and we must do so with strength and fortitude.

Forget all the literature and research about how lifting will help your overall health - you already know that. You’ve heard it before, I don’t need to hammer you with it. (Ok I’ll sneak a few in - bone density, metabolism, less fall risk…better sleep, better mood!) But let me rein it back in…

Let me repeat, and I’m going to narrow the focus on this one:

It is a PRIVILEGE to get older.

Now, that doesn’t mean we have to like everything that goes along with it!! There may not be much you can do about wrinkles aside from Botox (and sunscreen? Retinol? Serums? Lasers? Leigh, help me out here!) But it makes me so sad and honestly angry when women (or anyone!) starts to get fussy about getting older. Let’s shift the dialogue…

If you are getting older you are one of the LUCKY ones.

In the past few years you or people you know may have lost amazing people in your lives - I know I have. It sucks. And it has really put things into perspective. Stop being so worried about your wrinkles, grey hair and how your body is changing. Ladies, if you have had children, you grew WHOLE HUMANS inside of your body. OF COURSE your body is going to change, and what an amazing feat your body did, and gave you probably the absolute best part of your life now or ever. This is not to negate or diminish anyone’s experience - whether you choose to have children or tried or didn’t/don’t want them, are trying… is not the point here - the point is your body (kids or no kids!) will change.

For me - my ribs are wider - so are my hips. I won’t even mention (...as I mention…) my chest after breastfeeding (but again how lucky am I to have had the privilege and option to do so!). And apparently my uterus has done some flip flop thing so I’ve got that going on too.

As we take a ride on the rollercoaster of life (and hormones), and when you notice yourself getting frustrated (or freaked out) by greys, hot flashes, changing sleep, let alone the fact that sometimes your body feels a little foreign… let’s take a few breaths to pause, reassess, and DECIDE how we want to move forward. I’m not saying practice gratitude (but do… that’s great) - but life isn’t all roses all the time - sometimes it’s ok to say “this sucks” and not look for the silver linings.1 But we need to learn how to live without forcing everything down, without taking responsibility for everyone around us, without feeling like we need to look and be a certain (perfect) way. At the end of the day, honestly, no one else really gives a sh*t. Are YOU happy with your life and how you feel? And in 10, 15, 20 years… how you feel and show up in the world will (hopefully) be more important than how you look. AND if you take care of your body and mind now then I venture to say how you look will follow suit.

You are not a less worthy human because you’re closing in on (or in) your 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s… You are not less capable and you certainly have the ability to learn new things, create new patterns of thinking, develop new (healthier) habits, and steer your ship towards a healthier way of living and existing. Do it for yourself now, but also do it for the woman you’re becoming, and the one you want to grow into in the next decade. She’ll thank you for it.

If you want a place to start exploring - check out Better in Your Body: 12 Days of Strength • Mobility • Breath. (And share with a friend if you feel called to do so!)

Thanks for being here.

With gratitude,

lv

Yesterday I had the absolute privilege of working with a team of all women. Not only are they all women but they are all bad*ss, C-Suite women. They are smart, attentive, interested, hard-working… and stressed.

When I asked 1-10 with 10 being the most stressed they’ve ever been to 1 being no stress whatsoever the answers ranged from mostly 5-6, a few 7-8s, and one 15 (yes, 15… out of 10).

Two main things stuck out to me from our time together today:

ONE

When I asked if they had any questions or things that came up since our last session together one of the answers I received was, “I need to practice more.”

First of all, I loved the honesty. These women have SO much on their plates every day - and, as we discussed, we don’t have separate “buckets” for our work-life, our personal-life, our workouts/exercise, etc. These all draw from the same bucket. You are ONE, whole human. If you’re at a 15 out of 10 on the stress scale, five days of HIIT workouts and lackluster sleep is probably not doing your overall stress and wellbeing any favors. Your system can only tolerate so much before you start to creep into overwhelm, get sick, and careen towards burnout.

From there we talked about practicing when the stakes are low (or lower) - like when they’re at a 5 out of 10 instead of a 10 or 15 out of 10. In situations like a slightly-longer-than-comfortable breath hold, or even sitting still and testing out how it feels to actually allow yourself to rest or “do nothing” can you practice creating safety in the nervous system (which oftentimes is figuring out how to stay calm - not just look or seem calm - the calm comes from safety). When life gets hard, you don’t magically use new skills or tools - you fall back to the ones with which you’re familiar. Enter: practice. Get. your. reps. in. I bet that nothing you’ve done in your life that has stuck or has been worth doing happened immediately and with little to no effort. It’s the little efforts daily that will move the needle, not one, big cathartic event one time. (I’ll step back from my soap box on that one… for now.)

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TWO

“What’s the best way to stop my mind from racing when I’m in the shower or when my head hits the pillow?”

Whewwww I bet there are a lot of us who can identify with that question at some point in time, if not frequently…

• The situation you could have handled better at work/with your friend/with the room mom.

• What you could have (and wished you had) said instead.

• How to move forward with the coworker/boss/employee with whom you need to have a hard conversation.

• How to take care of your parent.

• How to set your kids up for success by how you raise them…

…the list goes on.

You may not like my answer.

Practice. And → It depends.

The more you do anything, the easier it becomes to do that thing. If you constantly worry about the future or are preoccupied with the past, fretting over what could have been or what that person maybe meant, what someone thinks about you or your work, you are robbing yourself of what you could be doing NOW.

Now listen, lest you think that I am constantly in this elusive “now” - I’m not. I worry, I fret, I plan, I regret, I am human and none of us have it all together all the time (more on that later). But what I can say is that I am far more able now than I was 10 years ago to bring myself back to the place of “now”. And I have done that through… yes, you guessed it. Practice.

And one of my favorite ways to practice that is by using the breath. Your mind can be anywhere - the past or future, but your BODY is always right here in the now, in the present moment. So, if you can focus your attention on your breath, which is in your body, then you can refocus your attention, your intention and your mind back to the present. (I also like a good brain dump to get it out of my head and onto paper before I go to sleep if she really won’t turn off.)

But the “it depends” is on you - what works for you? This is not one-size-fits-all. That’s not real life. What works for me may or may not work for you. I can give you principles to apply and help guide and hold you accountable, but it’s up to you to determine what to do with those and how to apply them.

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Questions? Thoughts? Thanks for being here.

With gratitude,

lv

Every rebirth requires a death.

In a conversation with one of my close friends this weekend she was talking about deadheading her flowers. We went down a side conversation about how flowers come back more vibrant, thriving and bursting with color and life, but only after going through this small death. The parallels to life were numerous, and looking back, I can see these moments throughout my life as well:

• Leaving Manhattan for Memphis.

• Leaving fashion after nearly two decades.

• Launching my own business this year.

Each one required letting go of an old identity before I could grow into the next one.

For my clients I see them letting go of perfectionism, anxiety, old ways of thinking, tension, and stepping into resilience, patience, capacity, more physical ease and strength (both mentally and physically).

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And speaking of my clients…

That brings me to something I’ve been meaning to tell you… In May I officially launched my own business.

Today I help motivated women move with less tension and more ease, build real strength, regulate their nervous systems, and create sustainable habits that actually fit their lives. And we do that with movement, mobility, strength and breath as the foundation. My clients are self-motivated but want guidance and accountability, so we create personalized plans that evolve week over week. Everything lives inside an app I built specifically for this coaching - it has your movement plan, habit tracker, breath/movement sessions, assessments, videos, and progress - all in one place, so you always know exactly what to do next, or what your options are.

Over the past few years, the more I’ve worked with people, the more I realized that so many don’t understand what their bodies are trying to tell them, how to pay attention to those signals, or how to manage their stress response.

I’ve found that practical tools, personalized guidance, science-backed principles, and tailored support can dramatically change how people move through their lives. That realization became the foundation of my business, and honestly the foundation for how I try to live my life with two small children!

Most people don’t come to me saying they want to breathe better or “regulate” - they say things like:

• I know what the tools are, but I don’t know how to integrate them into my life or where to start

• My core feels weak, my hips hurt, my shoulders are tight

• My breath gets stuck in my chest

• My heart feels like it’s racing, and it makes me anxious

• I am tired of yelling at my kids all the time

• I’m overwhelmed at work and feel like I’m stuck in stress, but on paper my life is great

One of the most rewarding parts of what I do is watching clients put in the work, use the tools at their disposal, and realize they can navigate difficult situations with more grace and composure than they could previously. They often discover that they are far stronger and more capable than they originally thought.

One recent client - in just four weeks:

• Improved her overall wellbeing by nearly 30%

• Decreased her perceived stress by over 25%

My work is highly individualized. I don’t believe that “one-size-fits-all” applies when it comes to strength, movement and breath. Each person, body, goal, lifestyle, and nervous system is unique, so I tailor the approach to you, as an individual. My blend of movement, mobility, strength, and breath is practical, science-based, and designed to fit into real life.

Life rarely goes according to plan, so instead of an “all or nothing” approach, I believe in practice and consistency over “perfection”. I help clients build adaptability because that is ultimately what builds resilience and capacity. So whether you’re navigating your own rebirth or change, trying to manage stress, or simply trying to feel better in your body each day, I’d love to be part of your journey.

In addition to working one-on-one with clients, I also partner with businesses and organizations that want to help their teams better manage stress and how they relate to each other, move well, and build healthier, more sustainable habits.

If you’re ready to feel stronger, calmer, and more capable in your own body, I’d love to help. Let’s talk.

And if you’re part of a business or organization looking to support the wellbeing of your team, I’d love to explore that too.

Finally, if someone came to mind while reading this - it would mean so much if you would tell a friend! (And tell a friend to tell a friend!) Word of mouth is how small businesses grow, and I’m incredibly grateful for every introduction and each time you forward this newsletter.

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With gratitude,

lv

To learn more:

www.laurenvestal.com

@vestal.lauren

One of the things I’ve heard a lot over the years is that you feel like you can’t get a full breath - it feels shallow, stuck, tight or unsatisfying.

The accompanying feeling may be anything from stress, anxiety, grief, or just a general feeling of unease.

The accompanying action might be snapping at your coworker, spouse, or having an unexpectedly short fuse with your kids.

Been there? Me too.

Want to try something that could help?

Follow along with me here for Jill Miller’s Dead Volume Refresher, which can also be found in her book (and one of my favorites) - Body by Breath.

Try it out —> HERE

And let me know how it goes!

With gratitude,

lv

If you missed the last newsletter, you may want to start there for context, but if you’re jumping in fresh - today we’re talking about the other two things I realized and learned on my couch to 5k journey.

Here we go!

Number 3! Presence.

I didn’t take my phone with me for any of my training runs, nor for the race itself. Which also meant no music (but yes better believe I had some heavy beats on in the car en route to Shelby Farms… along with my kids car seats. 😆) All that to say, I gave myself the chance to be present with my thoughts and my breath during my runs. I used them as a moving meditation of sorts. I paid attention to my body, my thoughts, my breath (and used it to either sustain or recover as needed).

Being present on the course allowed me to appreciate running through nature - things like the trees, birds singing, the heavy fog lifting off the fields around us, and it also allowed me to notice a big family of deer. Time seemed to slow down when I saw them - they weren’t scared, they were just enjoying the morning mowing down grass as we ran by. I’m not sure anyone else saw them, but I am always a little in awe of seeing animals in their environments. It felt like a gift to be that present and focused for even a short amount of time in a world that pulls in a million different directions at once - something always fighting for our attention. It was a very peaceful moment even as I was recovering my breath after a steep hill. Which brings me to…

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4. Attacking the hills (and using my breath intentionally)

This is where my competitive nature started to kick in. At the beginning of the race I could feel a familiar creep of anxiety. It felt like my throat was threatening to close in on itself like it used to feel like during fitness testing. What I would have given then to understand what I know now! But this time I was able to catch it.

No one was timing me, I wasn’t about to get cut from a team if I didn’t make a certain time, I wasn’t getting signed up for breakfast club conditioning, and I wasn’t letting anyone down - but apparently my body remembered the competitive pre-run jitters. That Sunday though, frankly, no one:

1. Cared if I was there or not

2. Even knew that I was there

3. Cared what my time would be or how fast I ran (or didn’t!)

It’s great to have goals - I’m all for them! It’s important to be striving towards something and continue to push ourselves.1 But my goal was the training and the actual doing/completing of the race - and running the whole time, finding joy and some peace through pushing my body and getting out of my own way. I was already two months into my goal. The next 25-ish mins were all that stood in my way.

So off I went. There weren’t many hills, but they were steep when they came. I felt that I was holding my own decently well, but as we approached hills I realized the difference in my training from other people running - my breath control. I was able to switch into a different gear and really get after the hills while other people took them as an opportunity to slow down or walk. I picked it up and recovered at the top, passing people back who had already passed me because I could sustain my effort and recover well. (I’m not saying you shouldn’t walk, it’s just an example! There are plenty of times when I do walk and when we need to, but we also need to figure out the difference of when we can/need to push and when to back off.)

If there’s a challenge in front of you what do you do? How do you handle it? Do you have faith in yourself and your training and get after it? Or do you slow down? (And do you know how to determine what you need to do - either attack or slow down?) Next time, try attacking the hill (literally and metaphorically) and see how you feel.

And the thing that surprised me?

Well, I picked up my pace for the home stretch, and after I crossed the finish line was walking back to my car when I saw someone holding their completion medal. I jogged it back to the check in to be able to prove to everyone that I actually got up that morning and did it (again, not that anyone even knew or cared, but my four year old did!) What I didn’t think about was where I placed. As the lady was getting my medal she also pulled up my results - first in my age group and 5th female overall. I was shocked. I wasn’t running to win nor did I think I was anywhere near the front, but nevertheless I was happy with the results of my efforts and took it as further proof that the results will come if you put in the work.

The lesson there? You’ve probably heard a version of it before - focus on the journey, the process, the practice… the result will take care of itself.

Thanks for being here.

With gratitude,

lv

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1

This is the Human Function Curve, where you can see that without some stress/push/goals we also won’t grow or increase performance. More on that another time though.

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PS - I’m excited to collaborate with on a series this Fall - The Missing Practice: Feel it. Regulate it. Live it.

The first two things I learned during my Couch to 5k:

About two months ago I set the goal of doing a Couch to 5k training plan, which means I also had to actually sign up for a 5k. I grew up as an athlete, but running (let’s be honest, true “cardio”) has fallen out of my repertoire in favor of yoga and Pilates for quite a while. After a few quick jogs around the neighborhood prior to this 5k commitment it was clear that I needed to add real cardio back into the mix (and a true strength training program to boot). Equipped with a new personal training certification and my Breath Science Certification, I felt ready for this new but familiar challenge. Variety is the spice of life, right?! So off I went.

It wasn’t until a few days after I had signed up for the race that I realized it was the morning after my dear friend’s wedding. Whoops! I was certainly not going to sacrifice being fully present for and enjoying that ceremony and party so I made peace with the fact that:

1. I may not actually get out of bed for the race and

2. If I did make it by some miracle, I would be sleep deprived and possibly not feeling my best.

I decided to play it by ear and make peace with the outcome either way.

Well, the wedding was incredible and I did get out of bed for the race.

Here are the first two things that I learned and experienced - I hope that these resonate with you in some way as well:

1. Mindset.

Consistently, with about 8 minutes left in some of my training runs my brain started making excuses for why I was starting to feel tired:

• I didn’t fuel properly.

• My sleep has been off.

• Life has been busier lately.

• My body wasn’t fully recovered…

You get the idea. The list could keep going. But because I’ve been working with this “helpful” little voice for some time now I was able to catch it before it brought me to “I can just walk for a minute or two…” or “this is dumb and I hate running - I’m giving up.” I was then able to shift back into “coach” instead of critic.

I replaced it with:

• You’ve done way harder things than this in your life.

• You are strong and capable.

• You have 8 minutes left - you’ve already done [however many minutes].

• It’s literally downhill from here.

• Your coffee is waiting for you at home ☕🥰

But guess what? I’ve been PRACTICING that shift for literally years. You catch the thought as it comes up (or after you notice it) and then shift it. Committing to it over and over and over until the default isn’t the negative road you’ve always been down.

This lesson that I continue to learn reminded me of the poem by Portia Nelson, “There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk.”1

2. Faith.

I saw my yogi friend, Faith, at the check in table. She is happy and delightful so I was excited to see her as I knew no one else there. I immediately felt more at ease (community! connection!).

But just by her name I was reminded of a few other things:

• To have faith in myself, my training and preparation - knowing that I put in the work, and despite my lack of sleep, I knew I could at least finish this 5k with relative ease.

• How faith applies in other areas of life:

  • Faith as I launch my own new business

  • Faith in myself to be able to handle what life throws my way

  • Faith that I can be a good mom and wife and friend

  • Faith in the higher power of your choosing

So those are the first two things that stuck out!

What have your physical or athletic endeavors brought out in your life? These things were not the ones I was expecting to find, but that doesn’t necessarily surprise me at this point. It’s like going on a little scavenger hunt - but you’re not sure what you’re looking for or what you’ll find, but it’s an interesting introspective discovery process along the way.

Stay tuned next time for the other two things I got out of my race and also how the race itself turned out.

Now that part did surprise me.

Thanks for being here! See you in a few weeks!

With gratitude,

lv

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A few weeks ago we were wrapping up school years, I was working on launching my own business and other busy family things - I caught myself thinking (as I often do):

I just need to get through the next four days.

My mind was on my to-do list - end of year teacher gifts, a few 4 year old birthday parties we needed presents for, when to pack a lunch vs. Field Day, who has a half day when, swim lessons, groceries, house stuff, making sure the dog was fed, playdates, laundry…reworking my website, building a new program, and jumping headfirst into new opportunities to grow my business… among other things...You get the idea.

Maycember was in full swing, and my kids don’t even have that much going on yet!

But as I sat on the floor playing with my 1.5 year old and Magnatiles, ticking off what I needed to “get through” in my head, I looked at her stacking these square, colored magnets together and it hit me like a slap in the face… there was no way in hell I wanted to “get through” moments like this.

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The birthday parties. The swim lessons. The chaos of everyday family life.

And especially actually being with my kids while they still want to be with me.

Even the excitement (and if I’m honest, trepidation) that comes with going out on my own and building something new - it’s all part of my human experience.

It instantly reminded me of my friend and something she says often:

Especially during this time of the year but also in times of transition, it’s easy to try to check things off the list and get things done. But your life is made up of these little moments in time that you’re trying to rush. If you’re always trying to “get through” them, what are you rushing towards? What are you missing that you could slow down and be present for? Because we aren’t actually guaranteed anything. And at the risk of heading towards a bigger existential perspective - I don’t think we’re here to rush through life chasing some imaginary endpoint where everything is finally done.

So of course, get done what you need to get done, work hard and push when you need to, but also realize that it doesn’t all have to get done at once (and it never will) and your to do list will be there (it always will!). But take a few breaths, take a walk without your phone, say yes to your kid who wants you to build a rocket ship launch pad with him (or maybe take him on a walk with you!), go move your body, and don’t forget to “be where your feet are.”

Thanks for being here.

With gratitude,

lv

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When Your Body Speaks, Are You Listening?

I’ve woken up a few times in the night over the past week with a lump in my throat and a tightness in my chest (and let’s be honest, some tears) as we know we’re getting ready to say goodbye to our 14 year old Husky (or as the vet said, our 100 year old dog). He has lived a great life. Some of you will say “it’s just a dog” and some of your hearts will be weeping with mine. My point here is not to belabor the issue of us saying goodbye to our sweet, gentle giant, but rather to give an example of the fact that our body will tell us things if we care to listen. For the past week mine has been signaling grief.

A lot of us will push through signals that our body sends, consciously (or unconsciously) thinking that we don’t have time to deal with it, or that one more email could be sent, one more meeting sat through, one more call made… but sometimes you need a few moments to pause, reflect and be present.

As humans we are blessed (and cursed depending on how you look at it) with emotions, and being able to interoceptively identify which emotion is surfacing and what our accompanying needs are can be a gamechanger in what we experience. Shad Berry of Next Level Leadership speaks to this well (and taught me the following framework).

For example:

If I know that I’m feeling sad, I might need to next identify what I need (see chart below), and equally as important, who can help me meet that need.

• Because just like different people are drawn to different coaches for different reasons, certain people can help you when you feel stuck on a specific thing and other people are more equipped to be with you for other situations.

• Example 2: I wouldn’t call my bestie in Boston when my four year old punches himself in the eye while taking off his sock, but I would call my Ophthalmologist brother in law.

• Example 3: If I’m feeling frustrated with a situation with a client canceling last minute frequently, I wouldn’t call my mom to help meet the need of Identification, Perspective or Advice - she will always be on my side! (Thanks, Mom.) But maybe I call a colleague who has had a similar issue and can provide those things.

Here’s the through line - if you are rushing too much every day and never slow down then:

1. You’ll probably hit a wall sooner rather than later and either get sick, feel overly reactive, operate from more of a tunnel vision, fearful perspective, or a combination of those.

2. You will have trouble tuning into yourself and what your body actually needs - are you hungry? Tired? Worn down? Doing too many HIIT workouts while you constantly push yourself to the max for work?

3. You may go through life without taking enough time to enjoy it or be truly present for the moments that matter.

Ok let’s wrap it up!! Today/this week - take a few moments each day to slow down, pay attention to your breath, identify how you’re feeling (yes physically, but also emotionally) - and then decide what you need from there.

With gratitude,

lv

A lot of people in high-performing environments pride themselves on pushing through. And listen - there are times that we need to do exactly that. Early meetings, late nights, constant output… and that’s ok for a sprint, but don’t confuse a sprint for a marathon.

If sleep becomes the thing you sacrifice, you’re going to eventually hit a wall.

And just like you don’t get stronger from workouts alone, you don’t get sharper only from doing more, you don’t make better decisions only by trying harder… You get those things from stress and recovery.

And if recovery isn’t prioritized, you won’t be performing well for long - you’ll just be accumulating fatigue and might be heading towards taking a week off work because you’re sick (or eventually burnout).

Here’s an example - this is the Arousal Continuum (from the School of Breath Science):

Now imagine you’re always over on the left - anxious, stressed… you’re going to have a much harder time getting all the way to the right to sleep and deep rest if you’re always on and high stress at that.

Knowing how to manage your stress is key, but that is also easier to do when you’ve slept well and enough. When you’re underslept, your physiology shifts. Stress hormones stay elevated. Your brain has a harder time regulating emotions and making clear decisions.

Here’s the good news: this doesn’t require a full overhaul. It requires a few consistent signals your body can rely on to help support your circadian rhythm and restful sleep.

For the next two weeks - pick 1-2 of these to try and stick with it. Let me know if anything shifts!

• Get outside in the morning sunlight within 30 minutes of waking. Even a few minutes of natural light helps anchor your internal clock and makes it easier to fall asleep later.

• Keep your sleep and wake times relatively consistent, even on weekends. Do your best to go to sleep and wake up within an hour of the same time.

• Create a short wind-down routine at night. Nothing crazy! Call it 10 minutes of reading, breathing, or stretching to signal that the day is done and signal to your brain and body that it’s time to wind down. Your nervous system loves predictability!

• Dim the lights and reduce screens in the hour before bed. Lamps over ceiling lights and/or blue light blockers if you like them!

None of these are groundbreaking! But they work if you actually do them. Better sleep means clearer thinking, better decisions, more stable energy, and the ability to show up the way you want to show up.

Let me know how it goes! Sweet dreams.

With gratitude,

lv

Do you use a wearable fitness tracker?

Have you thought about trying one? If you wear one do you live and die by the data it feeds back to you? Or do you forget to look at it sometimes? Let’s talk through…

Here are some things to consider:

• Check in with yourself before looking at your data in the morning. How rested do you feel vs. how well did your device tell you you slept?

• Do you feel tired at the end of the day and that you moved around consistently? Or do you need to look to see how many steps you got in to feel good about your movement (or not)?

• And here’s the big thing… what are you doing with the data? Are you making any changes based off of what it tells you?

If you notice:

• You slept poorly (per your watch) after a late meal or a few glasses of wine.

  • Will you then be more mindful of when you’re eating or how much alcohol you’re having and when?

• You saw that you got less than 6 hours of sleep a few times last week and felt more emotionally reactive, hungrier for less-than-healthy options, and your workouts felt harder on those days.

  • Are you changing anything about your sleep timing or consistency?

• Your wearable told you that you didn’t sleep well.

  • Do you check in with yourself to see how you’re feeling? Or do you take it at face value and stress that your day is shot because it told you so. (Pro tip - if you did, in fact, sleep poorly, you can try an NSDR meditation in the afternoon to help.)

Did you know?

• There is actually a term for those obsessed with optimizing their sleep based on tracking data: orthosomnia.

So here’s my final takeaway:

• If you’re using your wearable tracker to learn and implement new information, great!

• If you’re using it to track personal things or for your doctor, go for it!

• But if you’re healthy and you’re not doing anything with the data other than look at it (and maybe get stressed out about it) - why not take a break from it for a week or two and see how you feel? There’s nothing inherently wrong with it, but it’s all in how you use it, like anything!

What do you think about wearable fitness trackers? Would love to hear your take!

With gratitude,

lv

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Did you know?!

The first law of thermodynamics says that energy can neither be created nor destroyed, but only transformed or converted.

So then, how do you lose weight? Where does body mass actually go?

• Answer: you exhale it out!

That’s right. As you metabolize food and your body’s energy reserves carbon dioxide is formed as a byproduct. And (as you know at this point) we exhale carbon dioxide. Exhaling is how most of that mass leaves the body - through carbon dioxide. Cool, right?

How does this pertain to you?

• Optimal breathing during exercise (and on a daily basis) helps us use oxygen efficiently which in turn lets the body work harder for longer.

• It also ties to recovery, endurance and consequently how effectively (and how long) you can train to reduce mass (if that’s your goal).

• Your body can either use oxygen (aerobic) or not (anaerobic), but if you’re well trained aerobically your body won’t have to kick into the energy system that doesn’t use oxygen as quickly. (So you can sustain effort longer and recover better!)

If you feel breathless at low intensity and notice you’re breathing in and out of your mouth immediately during a workout (even at a warm up pace), start to pay attention to how you’re breathing on a daily basis first. If your breathing mechanics at rest need work, likely exercise will feel harder. You need to build a solid foundation first - cement in what it feels like to breathe and recover well on a daily basis, and you’ll have good habits to fall back on as you increase the demand on your body.

Something to consider on this Wednesday morning!

With gratitude,

lv

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PS - To take it a step further, when you exhale carbon dioxide it is then available for plants to process through photosynthesis. Which, from my perspective, further emphasizes the interconnectedness of our world. 💙

Small Shifts. Big Change.

Recently I had a client who felt like her world was constantly shifting underneath her feet. She was on edge, emotionally reactive and seemingly on the edge of burnout. She wanted to be more present and calm for her family, less reactive, and feel less rushed.

When we started out her Perceived Stress Score was moderate, she was also, as she thought, on the verge of burnout according to her assessment and she was scoring on average on her breath assessments.

We started slow - she didn’t have a lot of time to be adding things in. We opted for 10mins of breathing daily and a walk around the block with no phone three times per week. We kept it simple, adding in as we went - things like Non-Sleep Deep Rest to teach her how to rest and expanding on her breathing protocols.

She was diligent, but not “perfect” - she missed a day here and there, but overall she put in the work. And within four short weeks her situation changed:

• Her Perceived Stress Score went from moderate to mild stress - improving over 50%

• Her Burnout Assessment went from at risk of burnout back into the green - improving by 25%

• Her overall wellbeing improved by 15%

• Her breath assessments improved by 30-40%

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And most importantly she was feeling better, more energized, more in control, calmer and more present with her family. It didn’t take a life overhaul, but it did take commitment and a willingness to make some changes.

Her work isn’t done yet, but none of us ever “get there” - the minute you think you have it figured out, life will throw something else at you. That’s why I love these practices and principles - if you know how to use them you can apply them to whatever life throws your way.

If you want to learn more about 1:1 coaching - drop a comment below or reach out!

With gratitude,

lv

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You’ve heard us talk about (probably a lot) HOW you breathe matters.

Let’s dig in…

I know - you’ve heard me say this before. But it’s worth repeating because how you breathe shapes how you feel.

If you deal with neck or shoulder tightness, tension headaches, or a sense of being “on edge,” your breathing pattern might be part of the issue. When we rely too much on upper-chest breathing at rest, we recruit muscles that were not meant to do the heavy lifting, and that can make them fussy. Couple that with sitting at a computer or desk all day, likely a little hunched over and your neck and traps might be feeling it.

But also - breath and thoughts are tightly linked. It’s not just your neck and shoulders that may be suffering.

Erratic breathing often leads to erratic thinking. And when thoughts start racing, the breath usually is in lock step. The good news? You can work in either direction. Slow the breath, and the mind often follows. But this takes… bum bah dah dum… practice. There’s no chance you’ll be able to use your breath as a tool when you need it if you don’t practice when the stakes are low.

Two simple places to start:

1. breathe through your nose more often throughout the day

2. Start to incorporate some movement to give your diaphragm more room to do its job.

Here are a few easy stretches that you can do right at your desk - but before you do them, take a few breaths to notice how your breath feels and where you feel it. After you do these stretches do the same exercises of taking a few breaths and noticing how and where you feel it:

• Side Stretches

• Cat/Cows

• Seated Spinal Twist

Let me know if you have any questions and how it goes!

With gratitude,

lv

PS - Don’t forget to register for our rescheduled event with The Scout Guide Memphis and Raw Girls!

The Hidden Cost of an “Always-On” Nervous System

If your nervous system isn’t regulated you may not be sleeping well.

If you’re not sleeping well you may…

• Be more on edge the next day

• Make worse food choices than you would normally

• Have poor recovery or feel fatigued faster during workouts

• Be more likely to interpret interactions as threats or slights

• Be less open to creative collaboration

• Have less focus

• Be more inclined to react instead of respond with intention

• AND if you’ve gotten poor sleep (let’s say less than 6 hours/night for a week) you could even be putting yourself in a pre-diabetic state.

Oh and by the way your pain may also feel worse and your immune system could take a hit. And those are just repercussions of poor or not enough sleep, we haven’t even talked about the consequences of an always-on-high-alert nervous system (think chronic stress and sympathetic dominance).

When you’re in sympathetic (fight or flight) overdrive:

• Your respiratory rate will be faster (and likely more shallow/stuck in your chest) and consequently you’ll likely be overbreathing

• Your heart rate will consequently be faster (and reminder - your heart is a muscle, you don’t need it working hard all the time and putting it under constant, unnecessary strain)

• And because you’re overbreathing (see above) you will have low CO2 in the blood, meaning your blood pH levels will be more alkaline and your body will start to compensate to adjust the pH level back into balance.

So what to do? If you are feeling some (or all) of these things and you want to take steps towards change, you can start here:

Nervous System Regulation

And if slowing the breath down makes you feel more anxious, depending on where you’re starting that could make sense too (see last article on box breathing, for example).

Want to learn more about how you can use your breath to help yourself? Hit reply!

Thanks for reading!

With gratitude,

lv

Box Breathing is great… unless it’s not working for you.

Why does it work? When does it not?

Box Breathing is a great breath protocol - it’s one that most have heard of because, you know, Navy Seals, right? Or at least that’s what we’ve been told. (Navy Seals, chime in.)

Here’s how it goes:

Now this is great for a lot of people! If you are generally calm and want to use it as a tool when you get worked up, or when you need to dial in and focus, or to stay grounded it can be wonderful. Give it a go for 5 minutes or so and see how you feel.

But what about when box breathing either doesn’t help you or if it makes you instead feel more anxious. What then?

First, we have a few things to consider:

1. What’s your baseline stress level?

2. When do you get anxious during the breathing practice? Is it too long of a count for the inhale or the exhale? Do the holds make you feel like you’re fighting for your next breath instead of relaxing into calm?

3. Does you mind start to wander off and you want to move on or do you start to get even more anxious about your anxiety increasing instead of decreasing with something that is “supposed” to help?!

I get it!! You’re not alone!

The thing is if you’re starting with a low air hunger tolerance from either being in a constant state of fight or flight and/or overbreathing (breathing in excess of your metabolic demands… aka breathing too much in terms of depth/volume or pace) then box breathing may not help you right away. Even short holds can increase anxiety due to low air hunger tolerance, which basically means your body isn’t using oxygen optimally and consequently your body is working harder than it needs to on a daily basis, keeping you in a vicious loop of stress and overbreathing.

Whew. Not great, right? Ok but so what do we do?

• We figure out where you’re starting and work on things like (first of all) making sure you’re sleeping well and enough.

• From there we can dial in on your breathing mechanics (because how you breathe actually does matter and has implications that will either keep you in that stressed state - body and mind - or not).

• And then we can potentially start to work on air hunger tolerance depending on what your goals are.

Regardless, we’ll work to get your nervous system to a more balanced state from which you can more easily respond instead of being tossed around by day to day life feeling like you’re holding on with white knuckles.

And little by little, you might find that sooner rather than later box breathing may become more calming and focusing for you that it originally had.

And if you still don’t love box breathing, no big deal - there are so many options! Breathing isn’t cookie cutter - what YOU like and what works for YOU is personal. If you want some places to start or practices to try check out these free breath practices.

Or simply start here instead (can even start with in for 3 and out for 6 instead of 4:8 if that feels more manageable):

Questions, comments? Want to learn more? Grab a time to chat here.

With gratitude,

lv

And how to know if you’re overbreathing…

By now you’ve probably heard me say that how you breathe matters (and if this is new, hit reply — I love to nerd out about it!). But here’s something people often don’t realize:

Stress makes you more likely to overbreathe and overbreathing can change how you feel, think, and behave.

Here’s what’s happening in your body → the balance between oxygen (O₂) and carbon dioxide (CO₂) in your blood determines your blood’s pH level. When CO₂ binds to red blood cells, the blood becomes slightly more acidic — and that acidity is what allows oxygen to be released from hemoglobin and delivered to your tissues and muscles. Cool, right? CO₂ isn’t just a “waste gas,” it’s super important!

Here’s where things can get a little tricky → When someone is already stressed, breathing often becomes faster or more shallow (think more chest breathing vs lower). That leads to overbreathing, which drops CO₂ levels too much. Low CO₂ = less oxygen getting where it needs to go (think brain + muscles). The blood becomes too alkaline (not acidic enough), and the body tries to compensate by… breathing even more, so you can get caught in a vicious cycle.

That cycle can show up as:

• Feeling “Type A” or constantly on edge

• Burnout or long-term fatigue

• Mood swings or emotional reactivity

• A sense of air hunger or restlessness

The good news: this is changeable. We start by looking at things like:

• Air hunger sensitivity

• Breathing patterns

• Daily habits and stress load

Awareness is always the first step, because you can’t change what you don’t know!

If You’re in Memphis Next Week!

Don’t miss our event with Raw Girls and The Scout Guide Memphis!

Get the details here.

Questions, comments? Want to learn more? Grab a time to chat here.

With gratitude,

lv

In this conversation I sit down with to talk about how life actually unfolds—not the five-year-plan version, but the one shaped by pivots, pauses, and figuring things out as you go.

We talk about growing up in Memphis and choosing to plant roots here, how a career in fitness unexpectedly led him into real estate, and why forcing things—whether it’s a career path or a house—to “fit” rarely ends well. There’s laughter, honesty, and thoughtful perspective about building a life that feels good to live inside.

A few things we touch on:

• Why the moment you think you have life figured out… it humbles you

• The power of not forcing decisions

• What it’s really like to work with people (and big emotions) all day

• How one intentional breath can completely change a hard conversation

• Why eating well and moving your body quietly support everything else

One of my favorite moments is when Peterson shares how taking a single breath before a tense client call shifted his nervous system—and the outcome. A simple reminder that a pause (and a single breath) can make a big difference.

And don’t skip the end! Peterson wraps us up by sharing his top three takeaways that he thinks everyone should know. They’re practical, honest, and worth sticking around for.

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A little more about Peterson:

Peterson is a Memphis-born realtor, fitness professional, and digital content creator. With a background in health administration and a strong foundation in fitness and community, he brings a thoughtful, people-first approach to buying and selling homes.

Peterson serves the Memphis real estate market - working with buyers, sellers, and investors in both residential homes and condominiums. Known for his use of video and digital storytelling, he leverages content to showcase properties, educate clients, and bring clarity to the real estate process.

He holds a Master of Health Administration (MHA) and has been recognized with MAAR Excellence by the Memphis Area Association of REALTORS®.

For those of you who were wondering after watching…

We did find both Snoop on the Stoop and Martha on the Mantle.

Get in touch with Peterson:

Instagram (and don’t forget to follow - entertaining and educational!)

Get in touch with Lauren:

Website | Instagram

A little over a year ago as I was coming out of the murkiness of what seemed like a touch of post-partum depression, my therapist told me she didn’t think I was really in tune with what I was feeling.

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Honestly, I was a little shocked. Me?! Not in tune with my emotions?? I was the first one to boohoo at someone having a breakthrough in yoga teacher training. I would get angry at the unjust and nostalgic for the days of collegiate competition and being with my friends all. of. the. time. How could I not be in tune?

But this is why she gets paid the big bucks.

She was right. And she pointed me in Brené’s direction.

Fortunately I already had Atlas of the Heart waiting for me, unread, on a bookshelf in our home. It became my go to over the next few weeks. I turned to it daily to dig into what I was struggling to put words to and marinated on the implications, trying to unearth the why behind the emotion, but first trying to attune to the emotion itself. It wasn’t until I understood what I was actually feeling that I could try to do something about it. Without the awareness it would be like trying to whip up a gourmet meal in pitch blackness - you might crack some eggs into the bowl with luck, but you would certainly crack most on the floor.

But here’s my point… we have to have awareness first of where we are that helps us uncover how to move forward. If you know you’re tired and not sleeping well, and you know you’re stressed out, then you can do something about it.

But you can only do so if you are willing to look at what is stressing you out.

You can only improve your sleep if you start paying attention to potential contributing factors like the aforementioned stress, but also nervous system regulation, habits ranging from nutrition to exercise to how you respond to conflict (or potential conflict).

For example, what many people lump together as “stress” actually shows up in different layers. Here’s where Brené’s work (and Martin McPhilimey’s) becomes especially helpful:

• “We feel stress when we evaluate environmental demand as beyond our ability to cope successfully. This includes elements of unpredictability, uncontrollability, and feeling overloaded.” (Brené Brown, Atlas of the Heart)

• “Overwhelmed means an extreme level of stress, an emotional and/or cognitive intensity to the point of feeling unable to function.” per Brené again.

• And according to Martin, “Burnout is a biopsychosocial syndrome emerging as a prolonged response to chronic interpersonal stressors on the job/in Business/Relationships/Families/Coaching.”

  • In burnout in particular you’ll notice three categories with different potential presentations:

    • Bio: feeling drained/chronic fatigue, muscle pain, poor immune function, change in appetite or sleep habits

    • Psycho: self doubt, feeling helpless, defeated, unmotivated, sense of lack of accomplishment

    • Social: withdrawing/isolating, using coping mechanisms

And with each of these three states (stress, overwhelm, and burnout) we may need to use a different approach or starting point to help move you forward.

But the awareness of knowing where you’re starting is key.

➡️Let’s do this - take a breath, a pause… What are you actually feeling right now — do you have language for it yet?

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Just because you can, doesn’t mean you need to.

A friend of mine reminded me of this a few weeks ago. It’s still hard for me to wrap my head around, let alone allow myself to believe that it can also apply to me.

I had a teacher who would often reference the quote, “if you can, you must”. At the time it was empowering - “YES! I can! So I will!... and I will figure it out no matter what! Because surely I can, right?? Right??” It was a mantra I unknowingly had lived by for as long as I could remember. I would continually say yes to everything handed to me at work, or in life, but especially work - taking on more and more. I was the first one to my laptop and the last one to shut it down at night - jumping back on after dinner, sitting with my laptop on the couch cranking out orders, reports, emails - trying my best to stay afloat in a never ending wave of work.

At one job they hired essentially three people to do the job(s) I was doing after I left. And it wasn’t their fault - I didn’t know how to say no or pull back or speak up - I thought it would make me look weak and incapable.

But I was drowning. It wasn’t a sustainable way to live. I would squeeze in a workout if I could, eat at my desk, had no semblance of any kind of routine other than working and taking an hour (maybe) for myself to go to yoga, which was then (and often still is) a lifeline. Sleep was erratic and inconsistent. And I didn’t even have kids at that point! I don’t know what would have happened if I had a family at the time. I could barely keep myself above water.

After a few years of trying to keep this pace I knew I needed a change. I had already begun teaching yoga and after having my first kid I started my deep dive into breath and all things relating to sleeping better, nervous system regulation, and a more robust understanding of the connection between the brain and body. And it. was. game changing. Learning to control my breath changed my life and how I relate to people (and bonus: it also greatly improved my workouts and recovery and my patience when my little ones are melting down. 🙃)

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🤓Nerd Moment: Ultradian Rhythms

You probably have heard by now about circadian rhythms (your body’s natural 24 hour cycle).

But what do you know about ultradian rhythms?

• It’s a shorter cycle than 24 hours - usually about 90-120 minutes.

• During the day you can use these cycles for intense bouts of work

• Taking a 20 minute break between those bouts can help sustain focus

• At night these cycles work through the different sleep stages

I haven’t read it (yet) but Rossi literally wrote the book on the 20 Minute Break.

Try this week: Watch my conversation with none other than…

…our very own !!

Trading Stress for Stillness: Taylor Somerville on Finding Symmetry in Life and Business

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Questions, comments? Want to learn more? Grab a time to chat here.

With gratitude,

lv