This spring I decided to look into functional health. It was a recommendation from another healthcare source and it’s been very helpful so far. Functional health/medicine is very individualized and looks at how to help your body and mind functioning the best ways possibly for a long and healthy life. It is wholistic and often looks at foods, supplements and self care that can help improve your health. My journey started with a big set of comprehensive lab work that goes beyond what the primary care doctors usually look at. My lab work took a look at so many different things and then I got to meet with a functional health doctor to discuss what the results mean and what we can do to improve some of the areas that were deficient. In my experience, I found out my iron and ferritin were very low which indicates anemia which J am prone to, so I was surprised this hadn’t been looked at regularly throughout my life. I also had low B12, zinc and omega 3 levels and high insulin, cortisol, and indicators of inflammation that can be risks for heart disease. I found this all very interesting and useful information as I am generally healthy. So the doctor gave me supplements to help with all of these and said follow up with bloodwork in 3 months. Fast forward three month or so and I got to meet with the doctor again and review my new lab work. Everything had improved greatly! My zinc and b12 are very normal now, my iron is also normal and my ferritin is close to normal as well. My insulin dropped a huge amount which is great news! And we are going to check my inflammation markers again next time. We changed a few supplements around as well. The doctor and I also discussed my really annoying weight loss plateau and she said I should have 30 grams of protein at every meal, add some kind of smoothie or shake with lots of protein for breakfast which I always skip and meet with a functional health nutrition coach, which is included in my plan. So here I am about two weeks later, I’m loving Happy Viking proteins meal shakes for breakfast, taking my supplements as directed, increasing fiber, loving Oats Overnight as a filling, delicious and nutritious addition to my lunch that is not always easy to get in and I see the functional health nutrition coach soon. I might have finally broken the weight loss plateau, so we’ll hopefully see that keep improving. I see the doc again in October, so hopefully more good news!

I’m going to share a true story from my real life as a therapist which I don’t think I’ve done much of yet. Yes, everything in therapy is confidential with a few exceptions, but we can share stories as long as we don’t give any identifying information. Just want to make that clear in case anyone wonders if it’s OK for me to share this. It is. So there are definitely some challenges that come with my job and parents can be a big one. I love working with teenagers, so I can’t completely avoid parents. Most of my teens’ parents are really great and support their teens going to therapy and stay out of it, which is great! This isn’t a story about one who refused to respect the process and confidentiality, which is often an issue, this is the story of a parent I think is possibly batshit crazy. Love the teen! Teen came to see me weekly for a good 6 months no problem. Mom said the therapist before me suddenly stopped taking their insurance, which makes little sense because insurance contracts are done yearly or every couple years and they have a really nice insurance plan through a very popular insurance company. So fast forward to summer, all of a sudden mom is late canceling appointments saying the teen is fine, but wants to keep the weekly appointment, says she’s looking for another therapist for some reasons that also made no sense, I put in a referral for another therapist which she ignored. So after 3 weeks, teen comes for a session and mom is there to talk about what’s been going on. No problem. I offer to make a monthly appointment if that would be better and remind mom of the referral for another therapist. Mom says the therapist she was thinking of isn’t taking new clients, dad thinks having regular appointments is important because even when you feel fine, you never know when mental health will take a turn and mom admits it’s not fair to me to keep canceling. All good things! We find a new time for the rest of summer and decide to go from there. Mom cancels the first 2-3 sessions after this and I’m ready to discharge for noncompliance with the next late cancellation. Then teen comes for a week! Great! The next week, mom calls the main number and asks an admin to send me a message canceling that weeks appointment and says she did it that way because of time. Mom has always called me directly, so this is already strange. I received an internal message from said admin relaying the message. This is another late cancelation even though it’s not day of, so that fee stands and I note client is being discharged. I do a termination summary and even write a letter explaining and put it in the electronic file where mom gets a notification there is a letter to review. My part is done. I feel bad because again, I like the teen, but I can’t keep losing money and having space wasted by mom. A few days later, mom brings the teen for a medication follow up and stops at the front desk and talks to the admin complaining about the late cancellation fee and wanting to set up more appointments for the teen. I again am relayed the message. This is all after I have done my part to discharge and mom knows damn well she has to talk to me about making appointments, so again, it’s getting weirder. I call and leave a voicemail explaining again to mom our cancellation policy and that the fee stands and that the teen is no longer on my services and why and remind her of the letter in the file. Again, my part should be done. Fast forward one week, mom leaves me a voicemail wanting to schedule more appointments for the teen since school is starting soon. Suddenly she can call me directly again, but there is no point. This is no longer my client due to noncompliance and she has been told this multiple ways and times. So clearly, this lady is trying to mess with me and play games. She’s definitely done this to previous therapists and I have a feeling she’s not done bothering me. So, if you know folks who are therapists or you go to therapy, be kind to the therapists. You have no idea all the craziness we deal with ❤️

I finished this awesome book, Brimstone Hollow by Archer Sullivan. It’s her second book and also has Annie Gore, private detective as her first book does. Fabulous story again! Great mystery and you never know what really happened until the end. Check her out for sure! So my next read is The Measure by Nikki Erlick. The premise of the book is that one day in spring, everyone in the world finds a wooden box with their name on it and inside the box is a string that will tell you how long you will live. The story follows 8 people and what they decide to do with their boxes. I haven’t read it yet, so I don’t know, but I wonder, if you could find out how long you will live, would you want to know? This is my question for you this week. Probably not easy to answer. For me the curiosity would be hard to fight, but I think I would not want to know. I’ll let you know more about the book next time 🥳

Thank you, each and every one of you, for being here. It means the world to me and more ❤️ Please come and subscribe if you haven’t already, hit the like button even if you prefer lurking, leave a comment and let me know what you think, how you are, if there’s more you want to know 🥳

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

I didn’t have any plans this weekend, but Adult Mini Me asked me to go to a concert with her on Friday. The group is called Bungalow Collect and they call themselves the founders of disco rap. Let me tell you, this was sooooooo much fun! These guys are building their name on their own. They have turned down some recording deals and such because they do not want to give up creative power and they shouldn’t have to. No artist should have to sell out to a record company. So I love that these guys are doing this independently. They promote themselves on Tik Tok and Instagram and really bring such great energy! They got us to sing and dance and told some stories and it was really such a great time! 10/10, highly recommend! Disco rap is a fabulous vibe and I look forward to more of it. Go check out Bungalow Collect now! You’ll be glad you did 🥳

Thank you to those of you who took the time to answer the questions last week! I got to read some really great answers ❤️

Here’s just one for this week: You meet someone at a party and absolutely know that if you talk to him, he’ll make you tens of millions of dollars, but after 2 years you’ll go bankrupt and have to scramble to get back on your feet. Would you start the conversation? Assume that if you do, your knowledge of what’s in store for you will vanish.

My answer to this questions is I would absolutely not talk to this person. In fact I would leave the party and go somewhere else to avoid the chance of talking to this person. All the money in the world is not worth it for two short years and to only have a big crash and struggle to get financially stable again. No thank you. I will keep my current state of things happily.

In music world, The Afghan Whigs dropped a fantastic new album on Friday called Soft Control. This is what I am listening to repeatedly now. It’s really fantastic! They’re one of my favorites, but this album is really up there as one of their best. It has the harder hitting songs and also some really beautiful songs with piano and cellos that just give me chills. Love it!

In reading world, I finished The Shampoo Effect by Jenny Jackson last week. I really enjoyed her first novel, Pineapple Street, and I really enjoyed The Shampoo Effect as well. It’s the story of long time east coast friends and an aspiring writer who comes into their tight knit circle while she is dating one of them who happens to be the father of the baby one of the women is having. Yeah, it’s really great. I liked the way it all played out. Give it a read!

Thank you so much for being here as always! Connecting with you is the best part of Substack, so hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message or carrier pigeon, reach out anyway you would like any time ❤️ Please hit subscribe if you haven’t already and feel free to share this if you know someone who would enjoy it.

Until next time, please be so good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

1. If you had to be obsessed with money, sex, sports, religion or food, which one would you choose?

2. How would you react if you learned that a sad and beautiful poem that touched you deeply had been written by AI?

3. If you were on a jury, would you be able to convict a person for something you didn’t think should be a crime?

4. If you could anonymously and safely destroy any one person’s reputation online through various postings, would you? If so, who and why?

5. On a typical Sunday, 10,000 people visit the Louvre in Paris. If a wicked sorcerer threatened to vaporize all the museum’s visitors or all of its art, sparing one or the other based on your plea, which would you save? Assume the sorcerer will obliterate both the people and the art if you don’t choose.

6. Would you like to be famous? If so, for what? What if you knew it meant within a few years you’d lose all your current friends and never develop new relationships that were as meaningful?

7. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about any one thing about yourself, life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know and why?

8. What is your favorite fruit?

9. What is your favorite color?

10. Do you like pizza and if so what toppings are your favorite?

Yay! I’m looking forward to reading your answers for sure! I threw a few easier questions in at the end so no one hurts their brain too much 😂

Until next time, be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

Earlier this week, I was shocked by a news story I came across locally. It said a former radio personality is being charged with first degree sexual assault of a child. I’m not naive and I know the monsters live among us everyday, but this was so close it was more jarring than usual. This is someone I have been around multiple times. I don’t know him personally, but he was for a time a big part of the community and curated and participated in many wonderful local events. Never would I have ever thought he would harm anyone let alone a child. He was a DJ at a local station for a long time and eventually became programming director and then a year or two ago he kind of disappeared. He is a father with I think four children and a wife of many years. I have shared space with him and that is very disturbing. It’s been a shock and quite horrifying for my amazing city and community. For me there’s an extra layer as well because this all came out when he emailed his therapist last fall and confessed what he had been doing. The therapist of course turned the emails over to the police and now there are official charges. From what was shared, I believe it was his own child or children he abused. As a therapist, this is not something I have had to deal with and hopefully never will, but it’s horrifying. No one wants to be the person who has to make that phone call and read those details. I’m glad he felt guilty and came forward so that now hopefully his victim or victims are safe and getting help. I hope his wife is long gone with the kid and changes their last name so none of them will have to hear, oh, didn’t your dad do this really horrible thing. His life is over as it should be. I hope his wife and children are able to recover and find peace.

On a much happier note, Lizard the concert junkie went to see The Goo Goo Dolls on Thursday night and it was so amazing! Now, I’ve been a fan of the band since I was a teenager and I saw them 20 years ago which was also fantastic. Here’s the thing, when I last saw them 20 years ago, they were doing a coheadlining tour with Counting Crows. I had seen Counting Crows before and they were awesome, so this seemed like a great idea. The Goo Goo Dolls played first and killed it for a good hour or so and then Counting Crows came out. It was one of the worst shows I have ever seen. Adam Duritz just rambled incessantly, making no sense and even sat down in the stage at one point just rambling away. You could see the band looking at each other like, what the hell are we supposed to do? They tried to keep it going and played the intros to some songs many times before Duritz would actually shut up and sing for a bit. People left. My friend and I sat down and eventually left as well. It was a really weird train wreck. I have not seen Counting Crows since then because I don’t want to chance having the same experience. But I came to learn that the order of the bands was reversed because originally The Goo Goo Dolls were supposed to play second and apparently someone decided there were more Counting Crows fans here and swapped the order. So I have felt like I got ripped of for 20 years 😂 Thursday night more than made up for that. They came out and blazed through 26 songs and were so much fun and made sure we all had so much fun too. I love that I’m able to do things like see a band that’s been around for 40 years and they are better than ever and still kicking ass and pleasing crowds. Redemption is so sweet 🥳

In Wisconsin, we have probably the best state fair in the country. It’s happening right now. Last year my daughter and I didn’t get to go because we had horrendous floods that washed out many things including the fair grounds. Last night, we got to make it back finally. We’ve gone at least once every year for her whole life. She and I had a nice game plan going in and accomplished all the things we wanted to do and see. We got the best fried cheese curds out there, as we always do, saw many fantastic animals, got some home grown treats at the Wisconsin Products Pavilion, and cruised through the exposition center making sure to grab a poster for my mom. As we went to check out with the poster and two shirts, someone managed to make a huge wooden wall of shelving that holds t-shirts fall over. In all my years of the fair, this has never happened 😂I didn’t even think you could make those shelves fall, honestly. I also have a special knack for people and things falling on to me in public, so of course this happened while I was there. The young guys working the stand were funny about it and no one got hurt, so it all turned out OK. A tiny bit more adventure than expected, but it was so good to be back to the fair and we had a good time!

Your turn! Come and leave a comment or send a message and tell me what’s going on in your worlds! How are we doing? Surviving? Hangin in? Thriving? I want to know! Please hit the like button and subscribe if you have not already. It’s free and a wonderful way to support each other here 🥳

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

My staycation is officially over. Tomorrow is back to the grind and I’m glad I got the time off, but I’m still bummed because it went way too fast and I feel like I need more time. But life says time to go make money, so I have to get back to it. Over staycation, I finished two books, took myself on a concert date, got a new tattoo and went out of town with my mom on a strange adventure. The plan was to go to Stevens Point, Wisconsin and check out this sculpture park there. We did indeed go to Stevens Point and we did find the sculpture park, but it is apparently in some creepy woods, so I opted not to go in there 😂 Saw a couple from the street. Not sure we missed much. Maybe I’ll go another time when it’s cooler out and not prime bug season and I have more daylight. We’ll see. So we decided to go get some ice cream and both ice cream stands were packed because apparently that’s all there is to do in a smaller town in the summer. So we ended up with shakes from Baskin Robins 😂 They were damn good shakes though. Highlights for me were on the way home. We got food at Beckets in Oshkosh which is a fantastic restaurant! Maybe the only really cool thing in Oshkosh, but we got to stop there and it was delicious 🤤 We also stopped at this big candy store in Theresa, I know it looks like the woman’s name but people pronounce the th, so there is that. I stopped there one other time and it’s pretty impressive! They have a lot of candy you don’t find easily and a huge menu for burgers and sandwiches and appetizers plus ice cream and coffee drinks! Quite the place in this tiny town! I got some candy, even found some Chick O Sticks! It was fun! So good times were had, but I can use more time. I’m still tired 😂

So Monday night I went to a concert by myself, I like to call it taking myself on a date and for the record I am still the best date I’ve ever had 🥳 It was lovely. The concert, Aimee Mann, was amazing and I had a very good time. In this process I took a picture of myself and posted it to my social media which is something I rarely do and part of the reason I don’t do it often is because of what happened after. Posting a picture of myself is apparently an invitation for strange men to comment and message me which I think is creepy and ridiculous. I know this happens all the time, but why? Who told these people it’s acceptable to bother a random person because they put a picture out there? Now mind you this was just a regular little picture of me. Nothing sexual, not even showing my body, just me in front of my garage before I left. It’s a good picture! But alas, here were the creeps particularly on Threads leaving comments about how I look. One said something about my adorable chubbiness and I could have puked, a few other sent me messages as if because they saw this picture and decided to follow me, that means I want to talk to them or date them. I never gave any such indication because that’s not what social media is for to me. Yet here they were. Most I just deleted and blocked, but of course I had to ask one who sent multiple messages for no reason if I knew them. I knew this wouldn’t end well because apparently in this day and age a woman cannot tell a man she isn’t interested in talking with someone she doesn’t know without getting attacked. Sure enough, I asked if I knew this person, they said no, sorry, I said right then and then he started asking me where I live and I said I’m not interested in messaging with someone I don’t know. The response was Get fucked, you added me. Well, no I did not you greasy ass bald creep with a giant cigar in your mouth. And regardless, I’m the bad guy now. It’s ridiculous. People should be able to post a picture of themselves and not have to be sexualized. I have plenty of male friends on FB that don’t do this and I appreciate that. Hit the react button and like the picture or heart it. That’s fine! If someone has a genuine compliment, cool! But for the love of everything, randos go away! It’s no wonder they are alone with the way they think it‘s acceptable to treat others, especially women. I will get off my soap box now 😂 Stay safe out there!

On that note, my therapist and I were talking about how I really do seem to have a magnet for the creeps and jerks more than most people and weird encounters happen to me a lot! I don’t know why this is, but it can stop any time now 🤦🏻‍♀️ All is still quiet with the most evil ex ever. I am grateful and learning to make the peace regular. I know he’ll surface eventually, but I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it. And it will be something that happens more than once. I know this. It’s how evil monsters are wired. That can’t just let you go in peace. But until the first reappearance comes, I’m making peace my normal 🥳

I finished two books this week! I finished It’s Always the Husband by Michelle Campbell. I know it’s a book I got for free from Thriftbooks and it was really good! Quite the story and you don’t know what really happened when someone is found dead until the end. Definitely worth a read! I also read The Perks of Being a Wallflower and it is such a wonderful little book. I’m not sure if I’ve watched the movie, but I will be doing so tonight. It’s written as a series of letters from teenaged Charlie to a friend. He documents his life through his freshman year of high school and he is awkward and different, but so bright and full of great ideas! It’s really touching and I enjoyed it very much.

I did take myself to see the ever amazing Aimee Mann play her album The Bachelor No. 2 or The Last of the Dodos in its originally entirety. She’s known for her more melancholy lyrics, but she shows them off well! She’s tall and very funny and it was wonderful to be there and hear the stories behind the songs. She is truly a wonderful artist. I hit shuffle on the never ending playlist while road tripping as well. That’s always fun because every song is a surprise 🥳

All right, your turn! Come and hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message, share your Substack with me if I’m not already subscribed. Hit subscribe if you have not yet. It’s free!!!!!!! And come and tell me how you’re doing! How is summer or winter depending on which side of the equator you are on? What are you finding joy in right now?

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

I’ve done a few more things by myself recently and I realize more and more that I really enjoy my own company. Maybe that’s something I’m learning as I get older, but I really do enjoy being by myself and doing things on my own sometimes. I went to the movies by myself, (The Odyssey is really well done, by the way) and I went to a musical by myself and I had such a nice time. It was so peaceful and relaxing! I do enjoy the company of others at times, but my own company is quite good as well and I’m looking forward to some more solo time. Do you ever do things by yourself? Do you enjoy being with yourself? I highly recommend it 🥳

It is time for a Lizard staycation once again! I’m going to another movie by myself, a concert by myself and taking a little trip to Steven’s Point, Wisconsin with my mom to see the sculpture park there. So mostly staycation. I’m happy to have time to not feel rushed or pressured to do anything. I’m still getting house chores done, but being more leisurely for sure. I wish I could have more staycation time, of course, but I will take what I have and enjoy it immensely and tell you how it goes next time 🥳 I do highly recommend staycations. Have you ever taken one?

A little update on my recovery journey here. All is still quiet from the evil one and I certainly have no intention of making contact, which is good. He will surface eventually. He can’t handle not being in contact and not being able to play sadistic games. Hopefully I will be ready to handle it better when it happens. But for now, I am enjoying the peace. I have been weirdly tired at times time lately and I realize this is because my mind and body are not used to peace and quiet. I’ve become used to living in state of chaos. I do not recommend this. So part of recovering is being tired and just resting more if that’s what I need. I’m listening to my body more for sure and trying to just be and enjoy the peace. So that’s where I’m at right now.

In music world, I got to see the always amazing and wickedly funny Mike Doughty Thursday night with my brother. This show was supposed to happen in March and had to be rescheduled, so I’m grateful to have gotten to go. Always a treat! I have listened to a lot more L7 lately with the death of Jennifer Finch still so fresh. Tomorrow I get to see Aimee Mann play The Bachelor No. 2 or Return of the Dodo in its entirety. Looking forward to this for sure!

In reading world, I finished The Girl the Sea Gave Back by Adrienne Young. This is like her second book, so it was different than later books of hers I’ve read, but it was a good story! Worth a read for sure. There are clans, definitely based on Nordic clans, that end up in battle and a girl who has been living with a clan she is not part of for many years is the key to it all. Good story for sure! I just started It’s Always the Husband by Michelle Campbell. Great title for a book 😂 I’m looking forward to see how the story plays out!

All right, tell me what’s going on in your worlds? Are you vacationing or staycationing? Where it the best place you have visited on a vacation? Please come and leave a comment! Hit the like button, send a message, a pony, a pigeon. However you would like to connect, I’m here for it 🥳 Also please subscribe if you have not done so already. It’s free!!!!!

Until next time, be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

L7 is a band that changed my life. When Bricks Are Heavy was released in 1992 my 15 year old mind was blown. I hadn’t seen this level of ferocity, funniness, straight up no bullshit music often and to have it come from four incredibly badass women was the ultimate gift. They get it, to say the least. They unapologetically spoke out about politics, women’s rights, and just the challenges women face everyday. They were not to be fucked with and there are amazing stories of what happened if one dared test this theory. They called women to the front and encouraged us to speak up and stand up and not let anyone else, especially men, tell us what to do or what we’re capable of. These four feminist icons came out with growls and snarls in their lyrics, badass thumping drums( Dee Plakas) and bass lines ( Jennifer Finch) and the ripping dual guitars ( Suzy Gardner and Donita Sparks). And to see them perform live took it all to another level. I had the privilege of seeing L7 twice. Once back in 1994 during Lollapalooza still fresh from the unexpected success of Bricks Are Heavy. And again in 2016 shortly after the had made a comeback to the stage in a much smaller space here which was incredibly cool. The power of what they had to say and what they stand for never wavered.

Jennifer was the cheerleader of the band. A lot of bassist are known for having resting bass face and kind of hang out in their corner driving the rhythm, but Jennifer was an exception. She got the crowd going and encouraged everyone to have the best time and sing along and be loud. She did the splits often while playing, was a hell of a crowd surfer and was always good for a fun face. I’ve read some really awesome stories from fans about things she did to help them out and connect with them as well as friends and family. The band is a family of their own and had planned a final tour for this fall before Jennifer’s health changed. She told them to go ahead without her and they were ready to do so for her. The plan still stands right now, but I won’t be surprised if the tour gets postponed or even canceled as this is a devastating blow.

My best friend also died from brain cancer 40 years ago on July 26. He happened to share a birthday with Jennifer, August 5. So this horrible thing that took my friend’s young life just shy of his 10th birthday has taken the beloved icon Jennifer Finch just weeks before her 60th birthday. I don’t think this is coincidence. I’m not sure what the meaning or reason is, but I hope it’s damn good. Jennifer made amazing tiny changes while here on earth and she will be dearly missed. Thank you for everything, for being, for the laughs, the activism, for showing so many of us young women and now older, middle aged women to take no shit, for knowing that being a good human and taking care of others matters. Please say hi to Jory for me. I’m sure you two will have much to talk about.

Fuck cancer. Fuck the patriarchy. Fuck this alternate timeline that keeps taking the wrong people.

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

I’ve been thinking a lot of peace lately. I think I’ve learned the value of peace and the value of my personal peace so much more recently. I enjoy just being at home with the cats and sometimes adult Mini Me and just sitting here watching TV or reading a book. It’s so simple and so calm and peaceful. I’ve realized how much peace I’ve really been missing over the last wild few years and I’m slowly reclaiming my peace and loving every second of it. Sometimes I just sit and smile and think, this, this is my peace and I need to keep it and guard it forever. It feels good and I am grateful ❤️

If you’ve been here fore a little while, then you know how much I love gratitude practices and having so much to be grateful for. I am focusing a lot more on gratitude right now as well. I have the best small circle of friends that are hilarious, supportive and never judge me even in my craziest times. I have the best daughter anyone could ask for who is so driven and ambitious and conscientious. She’s also a really great cook and baker and funny as all get our 🥳 I have a house that is mine and full of things and spaces I love and find peace in. I have a family who’s not all that bad 😂 These cats that make me smile so easily just by existing. A career I love and actually enjoy. It’s pretty amazing, really, to have so much to be grateful for and I am also grateful for this as well ❤️

So, telL me, what are you grateful for? What brings you peace? What brings you joy? I want to know! Come and share in the comments 🥳

I started another book, The Girl the Sea Gave Back by Adrienne Young. I have read a few of her books and really enjoyed them. This is one of her first from a while back and has some interesting mythological tribes and such that she created, so I will let you know more as I get further into the story.

I’ve been listening to my never ending playlist on shuffle this week and enjoying it. Sometimes I think it just knows what to play at just the right times ❤️ But I will need to dive into the new Jack White album, Frozen Charlotte this week for sure. I’m reading that it has old stomping rocking White Stripes vibes. He’s a brilliant musician and song writer and one of my favorites for sure, so this should be a treat 🥳

Thank you all for being here as always. The support means everything. Please hit the like button, leave a comment send a message, whatever you would like. Also hit subscribe if you haven’t already. It’s free and the best way to support each other here 🥳

Until next time, please be so good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz

Today I am purposely doing very little. Life has been extra busy lately and I have been missing my do nothing time. I think having a day to do nothing is so very important: we need time to rest, to recoup, to relax. To release (See what I did there with my word of the year?), reset and recharge. So today I am enjoying the couch, my cats, some good conversations and some streaming. I’m watching The Sheep Detective as I write this. I meant to see it in the theaters, but that didn’t work out. What about you all? Do you make time to do nothing? How to do you rest and recharge?

I had a really weird and icky experience recently, this isn’t a surprise at this point right? 😂 I got this brilliant idea to attempt to be a bit more social and maybe make a friend, so I downloaded an app for this. Not to date. Definitely not doing that these days. But curious what humans are out there that I can vibe with and have good conversations with, maybe. This is challenging in a world where too many people, maybe it’s just males I don’t know, don’t want to respect that I only want to get to know someone as a friend. Nothing else. No romantic relationships, no causal stuff or friends with benefits, that’s not my thing anyway, but still. So, as I suspected, many boring people, many not wanting to respect my boundaries around friends only, and then there was this odd one. This man from Utah wanted to connect and of course asked me why I don’t want a relationship and all that. I gave the nutshell version and he said he still wanted to get to know me. I said that’s cool as long as he understands this is not going to change my mind about where I’m at right now. So he asked for a phone number, I gave him a burner number because I’m not that naive. He would say random stuff usually more relationship oriented and full of the meaning less fake compliments involving beautiful and gorgeous. I was not digging this plus the lack of any real conversation. So one day he was quiet and I was hoping it was done. Then he appeared the next day and I was like, well, I’ll ask some questions and see what I can find out because something was way off. The messages he sent were very random and often at odd times. So I asked some questions and at one point he sent me a picture of his driver’s license. This was a very stupid thing to do on many levels and he’s lucky it was me who is not malicious and ready to use all of the personal information for nefarious things. But, naturally, I then Googled this person and checked their Facebook. Google gave me a news story from June 5 where this guy was busted in a sting trying to meet up with a 13 year old boy. Clearly very disturbing. I still need an acid bath after that one. But his Facebook has him claiming to be a proud gay man. This in itself is not an issue of course. The issue is, why is he posing as a straight widower claiming to want a relationship with a woman? So weird in a bad way and disturbing on many levels. Needless to say. I changed that burner number immediately and reported him to the app and blocked him. Welcome to my life where I try to keep it simple and this is the kind of stuff that happens. Be careful about there for sure! I think he was messaging from jail and maybe got the idea he should trap a woman who will fund his prison life. So gross 🤮

As far as my new journey in recovering from narcissistic abuse, I have been checking out some online support groups through ShareWell which has become a great resource. You can join four groups a month for free. I upgraded to a cheap membership so I can join as many as I want plus a bunch of other perks. I’m meeting a lot of different people with unfortunately similar experiences, but this is how we bond and support each other. Being with people who understand exactly what you mean and don’t think you’re crazy, that helps so much. So checkout ShareWell if you ever need a support group for anything or other groups too. They have a huge variety and it’s been very cool. All is quiet as far as the evil ex goes for now. I am reminding myself to enjoy this peace and hoping it helps me be stronger and more prepared for when he does surface again because he will. It’s part of what they do. But for now, I am grateful to have found more support and to be having some very peaceful weeks.

On that note, I finished reading We Burned So Bright by TJ Klune. It’s a wonderful and powerful story and a bit of a heartwrencher too. It’s short though, so that helps. Highly recommend! His writing is wonderful.

Musically, no shows right now, so I’m trying trying to remember to dig into more artists I should listen to more. I keep circling back to Phantom Planet still, but mixing it up a bit too.

Please come and say hi, tell me what’s going on in your world good bad or in between, hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message. Please hit subscribe if you have not. It’s free and a great way to support each other here. Please feel free to share this if you know anyone who might be interested as well.

Until next time, be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz

I’ll share some good stuff first, I took my first solo road trip two weeks ago. I went to Sterling Heighrs, Michigan to see my beloved Jimmy Eat World for their very special 25 years of Bleed American tour. Bleed American is their second album and the one that was their big breakthrough. Who doesn’t know the song The Middle? It’s on there. So I went all by my lovely self and I really enjoyed it! I will definitely be trying to do some more solo road trips in the future 🥳 The show was amazing. To hear this album in it’s entirety, plus some really great extras, was better than I could have dreamed. I will never tire of hearing The Sweetness or A Praise Chorus, but to hear Cautioners and especially, show highlight for me, My Sundown, that was incredible. The weather was perfect and the crowd was so good. Everyone being decent and just singing along and have the best time. Totally worth the 6 hour drive one way 🥳

The weather has been a little cooler than usual for this time of year here, but it has been very nice! I repotted my fuschia plants so hopefully they will grow much bigger now. I got a new tattoo that I’ve been wanting for 30 years and I’m in love with it, of course ❤️ My brother is visiting from Seattle with his super awesome girlfriend of many years, so it’s been nice to spend some time with them as well.

So here’s the part where I’ll write about what’s going on with me. Mom, you can stop here if you want. I know I’ve shared some stories about my most awful ex boyfriends here and I really thought the last one was the worst ever. But somehow I got super lucky and ended up involved with an even worse being. I don’t want to call him human because I don’t think humans are as evil and vile as he is. So back to back, really bad situations and I now realize I have been the victim of horrible narcissistic abuse. This most recent thing has gone on for a good two years. It should finally be over now because I have learned some things recently that are beyond horrible and there is no way I could ever be around a being like that again. having said that much, it’s also a total mindfuck. I know the wholeness of it all has not hit me completely yet. A little bit here and there, but I know that’s just the tiniest of beginnings. I can’t wrap my head around it. The short version, this vile and evil being has been emotionally, mentally and verbally abusive forever most likely. That’s enough in itself, but I have learned there are many, many other victims he has preyed on and that’s just in the 8 years he has lived here in Milwaukee. God only knows how many others there are in Oklahoma where he came from. It’s totally insane and beyond horrific and disgusting I’ve talked to a couple of these women. It seems he’s done worse to others and much faster than to me, but that doesn’t make it better. It makes it more confusing. Like why and how was he capable of hiding his awful self with me for quite a while? And why does he seem to have a boundary as to how far he will go with me? He has shown up at women’s houses uninvited when they have tried to go no contact and get away from him. He has also called some at work when they have blocked him everywhere else. He has humiliated some in public and private. But not me. They all got away a lot faster because they saw the evil a lot sooner. But not me. I’m still not supposed to know how vile he is, but I always learn the truth one way or another. So this is what I’m dealing with now. The aftermath of all this time being back and forth in this vicious cycle of abuse that although not physical, it’s still insane and very difficult to figure out it what to do with it all. I think it’s really important to talk about things like this because no one should be ashamed or feel like anything like this is their fault. It’s also a long and nonlinear process to process and heal from all of this and for me, talking about it is part of that process. Of course I have my awesome therapist still, so she’s there every week, I checked out an online support group last Monday and I’m going to check out some more. I wasn’t thrilled with how that group was run, but I did like being able to be there and share a bit with others who know exactly what I’m talking about and how I’m feeling because they have all experienced this evilness too. I’m very grateful and fortunate to have the best friends and therapist to help me and let me lean on them. Hopefully y’all won’t mind me talking more about this here as I know it’s going to be a long journey and not easy.

So now that’s out there, I’ll definitely share more and write more about this as my road to recovery keeps unfolding. I will also make sure to start showing up here consistently again. It’s important and I appreciate all of you so very much 🥳

I am reading We Burned So Bright by TJ Klune. If you’re familiar with him, you already know he’s a wonderful storyteller and writes about characters in the LGBTQ+ community with a little fantasy thrown in. This story is about a couple in their 70’s who are driving cross country from Maine to the west coast to see their son before the end of the world which is coming within 30 days because a massive black hole is burning through the solar system and will disintegrate most of the living things on earth. I’m excited to see how this ends!

In music. I’m still obsessed with Phantom Planet right now. I keep listening to their album Raise the Dead. I’ve also been listening to Aimee Mann’s Bachelor Number 2 as she is playing that this summer soon.

Your turn! Come and share something with me, anything! Thank you all for being here as always. Please comment, hit the like button, send a message, subscribe if you haven’t already. It’s free and the best way to support each other ❤️

Until next time. Please be so very good to yourselves and each other 🥳

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

Friday night I went to a concert 70 miles away in our state capital. I was super stoked to see the awesome band Augustana play their iconic album All the Stars and Boulevards in its entirety plus some other great songs. I knew there was another band touring with them and expected them first. Instead Augustana played first and they were fantastic! To hear those songs again and for even the front man and main songwriter to be transported back to another time and revisiting the nostalgia was amazing! So, I’m basking in the buzz of this phenomenal set and here comes the second band, Phantom Planet. I didn’t think I had ever heard this band before, but it turns out I did indeed know one song. Their song California was the theme song for the TV show The OC which I binged on streaming a year or two ago. Great song really. But holy smokes, all the songs are great! This band gave the most amazing energy, they were so funny and gracious at the same time. Every song was an experience. It was one of the best live performance I have ever experienced and I am still just buzzing from the awesomeness and joy. So, they are my new favorite band even though they’ve been around since 1994 😂 I wish I could have known them sooner, but I am so grateful to know them now. I’m wearing one of their shirts as I write this 🥳 The power and energy of this band is truly something to experience. Their albums are fabulous and I highly recommend them all, but go see them live. You will not regret it and you’ll know what I’m mean then. I hope they came back around soon.

On this beautiful June Sunday, I went to a banana ball game at our Major League Baseball stadium. Adult Mini Me came along for the fun. Banana ball is not your average baseball game. They have funny rules like if a fan catches a foul ball, the batter is out and instead of a walk, they have a sprint where the player gets to run as many bases as possible before the fielders can get the ball to the other fielders and back to home plate. They also have tons of entertainment. These players are not just baseball players, they dance and do trick moves too! It was such a blast and I’m so grateful we got to go. Getting banana ball tickets is not easy and this was the first time they had a game at our major league stadium. It sold out fast! So, hats off to the Party Animals and the Loco Beach Coconuts and their crews for coming here to Milwaukee and giving us an amazing game and show all in one 🥳 If you ever get the chance to catch a banana ball game, I highly recommend it.

All right, now I would like to ask you to share something with me for a change. Tell me something you are thinking about recently, something happy, something not happy. Anything. Just please come and share something, anything. Ask me a question if you would prefer. Anything at all. Connecting with all of you is my favorite part of Substack, so come and tell me more!

I’ve been listening to Phantom Planet a lot since Friday night and will continue my new obsession more this week. Check them out!

I haven’t read anything new this week. I’m slacking! Sorry 😂

Please come and share some stories, thoughts, questions with me! Hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message! Also please subscribe if you have not done so already. It’s free and the best way to support Substackers 🥳 Thank you all for being here. It really means everything to me ❤️

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other 🌼

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

May has been a more productive month for me, I think. Adult Mini Me has been gone most of the month, so it’s just been me and the cats. I’ve been cleaning out a lot of crap that’s gotten buried, which has been good, and staying more on top of cleaning in general. Being domestic is not one of my strong points 😂 I also have been reading more, finally, and focusing on taking good care of myself too. The first half of May had a bunch of events which was fun and the last few weeks have been a little quieter, so more time to keep up with other things. Work is steady and seems to be staying that way. So all around, it’s been a good month, I think. How has May treated you?

I have beef with our healthcare system here in the US, but that’s probably not a surprise. A huge beef I have is what they consider preventative and not preventative. So, for women 40 and over, a yearly mammogram is considered preventative. However, if the initial mammogram results show something off and you have to go back for more imaging and possibly a biopsy, this is not considered preventative by insurance and you will pay a mighty sum for care. This makes no sense to me. I had this happen two years ago and now it’s happening again. Something looks wonky in the initial imaging, they pay for that. Now I have to go back for more imaging, they won’t pay for that. Two years ago I also had to go for a biopsy which turned into not a biopsy because it was just a tiny cyst that popped when they put lidocaine in my boob. Also not considered preventative. My beef is, why not? The purpose of mammograms are to find abnormalities in breass that could be cancerous. So when one has something wonky show up and needs more imaging and maybe a biopsy to rule out cancer, is that not also preventative? The additional imaging and any other steps are to rule out or confirm cancer and treat cancer as soon as possible. That sounds pretty preventative to me. So screw the healthcare system, as usual. But I’m still going for my extra tests to take care of myself and fortunately, the hospital system I go through has a fairly generous financial aid system. But this is one of the reasons a lot of people don’t seek routine care or follow up with abnormal test results and then many die from preventable causes. We need to do better!

Today Adult Mini Me returns from her 4 week long epic European trip. She started with a short cruise from England to the Netherlands, to northern France, to Belgium. Stayed in London for 6 days before leaving on a second, longer cruise from Denmark. From Denmark she when to Poland, Lithuania, Latvia, Estonia, Finland, Sweden and Norway. Then she stayed in Copenhagen for 4 days and is now back in the US in Minneapolis waiting for her flight to Milwaukee. I’m very excited to hear all about her adventures and see pictures! What an amazing experience for her! I’m so glad she did this trip and that her boss encouraged her to do this before starting to work full time. So hats off, once again, to the ever unpriceable Adult Mini Me! I hope she gets to have many more travel adventures tires in life and maybe I can go on a few as well 🥳

All right, in reading world, I finished two books. I read The Fine Art of Lying by Alexandra Adams which is very good! I like a good mystery that involves some ridiculously wealthy people being taken down a few pegs 😁 I also read Dear Debbie by Freida McFadden which was also very good! Her books always have some murder and mystery and funny adventures before she tells us the whole story. I recommend both of these books for sure!

In music world, I’ve been listening to All the Stars and Boulevards by Augustana in honor of the 20th anniversary shows they are playing this summer. I’ve also been listening to Kacey Musgraves a lot more. I suppose she’s considered country which is not really my thing, but I think she’s less country than most and crosses into folk quite a bit. Definitely enjoy her a lot ❤️

On that note, thank you all for being here and for reading and supporting my writing! If you haven’t hit subscribe, please do so! It’s free and a great way to support each other 🥳 Please hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message, a wild buffalo, a giant tortoise or any other means you choose to connect ❤️

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

Friday night I went to our beautiful symphony hall for a free showcase of Milwaukee musicians. I know we have a lot of talent here and I think it’s very underrated, but I did not know I was getting three full hours of amazing performances from all local talent! It was quite a wonderful experience. I have seen the Milwaukee Symphony Orchestra perform a variety of music, from covering David Bowie and Queen, to backing Ben Folds, to movie soundtracks, to Stewart Copeland. It’s fantastic! We are truly lucky to have a symphony and they are truly amazing. Friday was not about our symphony though. I saw a high school drum line, a man played some piano songs, someone sang a few songs in drag, a couple who have been performing music as Frogwater for many years played some wonderful songs, there was a classical guitar piece, UW-Milwaukee’s string ensemble played, our Milwaukee Community Orchestra played, the Concord Chamber Orchestra, also local, played and we got the only performance for an audience by the Black String Triage Ensemble. This ensemble is very special and unique to Milwaukee. They do not perform concerts for audiences. What they do is show up to places where they has been a shooting and they play. It’s amazing, it’s sad, it’s to help people grieve and hopefully heal. They played for us and it was incredible. We also got to hear an orchestra we have that features the music of black and Latino composers to help people get more exposure to their work. It was an incredible evening and so much more than I was expecting. I hope this is a tradition that continues for sure!

With Spring hopefully officially here, I was thinking about all my wildlife friends. Have I ever shared with you how I like to name wild animals? It goes back to when I rescued a baby squirrel who I called Edgar. I think I’ve shared that story with you. So now all squirrels I call Edgar because I am sure little baby squirrel Edgar went on to live his best life. I have other animals I have named. There is a rabbit I see in my yard whose name is Floyd and Floyd is a girl. It could be a different rabbit every time, but for me, it’s Floyd the girl and I like to ask how she’s doing. There are a pair of coyotes near my parents house, which is like 2 miles from me, and they are Mosby and Martha. You can hear them playing and singing coyote songs most of the year. There is also a fox near my parents house named Kid Charlemagne. His partner, Lady Darlington, has been spotted near my house lately. I love animals of all sorts and naming the wild ones is really fun! I suggest trying it and giving them their own stories.

Adult Mini Me is half way through her epic European adventure, so I have been enjoying a lot more time to myself. I think it’s really important to enjoy time alone. I learned this when Adult Mini Me went off to college in California, about 2100 miles away, back in 2020. I wasn’t sure how I would feel or what I would do with time to myself, but I quickly learned I enjoy it! I don’t want to be alone all the time, but I am enjoying more alone time these last few weeks for sure. I have been just relaxing with the cats and reading and enjoying the quiet and I’m loving it! What do you like to do when you have time to yourself?

In music world, I have seen wonderful live shows the last few weeks and I am stuck on the song Downfall by Noah Kahan on his latest album. It’s my new favorite for now.

In reading world, I just finished I’m Not the Only Murderer in My Retirement Home by Fergus Craig. It was a delightful read! Carol is a convicted serial killer who is released from prison after 35 years and moves into a retirement home. She doesn’t kill any more, but just as she is settling in and making friends, there is a murder and people find out about her past. It’s a great mystery with some humor. I enjoyed it very much! I just started The Fine Art of Lying by Alexandra Andrews. I’ll let you know what I think when I finish it.

Thank you all for being here! Please hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message, engage and connect however you would like. That’s my favorite part of being here ❤️ Please hit subscribe if you have not already, it’s free!

Until next time, please be so good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

The last few weeks have been quite busy apparently. I’ve been having wonderful adventures! I saw Project Hail Mary with my mom two weeks ago. They really did a great job with the movie! The book is fabulous and has more details, of course, but I loved the movie as well. I am very impressed with the way the story was translated to the screen! I had a birthday on May 1 🥳 I love birthdays! I don’t do extravagant things, I just like good food and cake 😂I also am always happy to celebrate another year of being here. Getting to live life is such a gift! So here’s to the last year of my 40’s! I hope it is fanatic! Off to a great start for sure. The day before my birthday, I took a little road trip to Oshkosh, Wisconsin where there is a little museum about mental health as part of one of our larger mental health facilities grounds. It’s tiny, but full of history and good information! I’m glad we have come a long way since lobotomies and institutionalizing women just so their husbands could get rid of them and I know there is still much work to be done. My favorite was the display of items patients had swallowed. That was fascinating 😂 A lot of spoons and some other odd objects too. The day after my birthday I went to see the legendary Milwaukeean Brett Newski play. I can’t tell you what a wonderful human Brett is and he works his butt off. Catching a local show of his is a treat for sure! I also got a hug from his dad who knows my name from sending me merch and that was the cutest moment 😊 Then on Sunday. May 3 I took my dad to see the legendary David Byrne for the second time. That show was phenomenal! He is a brilliant human and his shows are amazing. There are wonderful visuals plus wireless instruments and microphones and very coordinated dancing. It was truly amazing and a wonderful way to round out the weekend 🥳 I gave myself time off on Monday which I wish I could do more often, but such is life. This weekend, I saw one of my long time favorite bands, The Afghan Whigs, play a show for their 40th anniversary. They melt my face!!!!! Greg Dulli is one of the greatest and most underrated songwriters and catching them live is amazing! So, I guess I have been a bit busy 😂But in such good ways 🥳

Today is Mother’s Day in the US, so I spent some time with my amazing mom. We took a drive and found a park not too crowded to sit and eat a danish in and then got some mini tacos from Kwik Trip and stopped by Pete’s Pops! I refilled my box and my mom got her own box of pops to experience. Simple and enjoyable. That’s the best way to celebrate! I am very fortunate to have the mom that I have. I won’t tell you it’s always been awesome or easy, but for many years now the Lizard mom and I have had a fabulous relationship and we have a lot of fun together 🥳 My mom has been through so much the last few years with weird health things that still don’t have a lot of answers. She raised four of us, with me being the oldest and of course the best 🥳 (I’m not biased at all😂) My mom is a total badass and a wonderful human. My siblings and Adult Mini Me and I are incredibly lucky to have her❤️ So happy Mother’s Day to my mom, who I literally wouldn’t be here without, and to all mothers, past, present and future. If you’re missing you mom today or didn’t get the best mom, my heart goes out to you and I am thinking of you ❤️

I am also a mom and the ever unpriceable and amazingly brilliant Adult Mini Me is currently in London, England. I am incredibly proud of her, if you didn’t know that already. She is an amazing human. She finished her Master’s degree and is off on a month long adventure before she starts her full time job in June 🥳 She took a short cruise leaving from Southampton, England and stopped in Amsterdam and Rotterdam in the Netherlands. Northern France and Belgium before returning to England. She’s staying in London this week before she heads to Copenhagen, Denmark to leave on a second cruise that is longer. I can’t remember everywhere she is going, but I will keep you updated as her trip continues. So far she seems to be enjoying herself and I am so happy about that 😊 It’s a once in a lifetime trip for sure and I hope it all goes well and she enjoys herself experiences 🥳

On that note, thank you all for being here always. Your support means everything ❤️ If you are new, welcome! If you are lurking, don’t worry, I see you and you can come out when you’re ready. Please hit the like button, subscribe if you have not already, and share this with anyone you want 🥳 And always feel free to leave a comment, send a message or any other way you want to connect. Connecting with all of you is the best part of being here 😊

Until next time, I won’t slack off again, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz

Thank you! Always!!!! Being here and sharing and connecting with each of you is my favorite part of Substack. As usual, please hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message or reach out anyway you choose. Please hit subscribe if you haven’t yet as it is the best way to support each other here ❤️

This week, I want to open things up with some questions for you. Please come and leave some answers. You can answer all of them, one of them, some of them. Ask me questions back. Whatever strikes your fancy.

Here we go:

1)What is something you are proud of?

2)What are your favorite smells?

3)What brings you joy?

4)What makes you cry?

5)Who would you choose to meet that has died?

6)What do you think about astrology?

7)Would you say you are religious or spiritual or both?

8)What is your biggest fear?

9)If you became a billionaire, how would your life change?

10)What is something most people don’t know about you that you wish they did?

I’m looking forward to reading your thoughts ❤️

Please be so good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz

It’s been a weekend of little and not so little local adventures. Milwaukee is such an amazing city and I say it is incredibly underrated. We have so many events happening all the time and so many great local businesses. This weekend, I made my first stop to Pete’s Pops which now has 4-5 local locations. They sell pops like popsicles but kind of fancy. They have a little window for ordering and all these flavors to choose from. Adult Mini Me and I got a box of ten pops, each choosing five, and if we bring the box back for a refill, we get a free pop! Nice deal 🥳 We’ll be back probably monthly for these delicious frozen treats. We also got dinner from Twisted Plants yesterday. They have two locations now. They serve the American favorites like burgers and hot dogs, but all plant based. The food is so delicious! I honestly don’t know what all goes into their burgers, but it’s all plants and it tastes so amazing! So a delicious plant burger and some tater tots for me. Today was a little early dinner, late lunch, I call it linner, from Pak Daman which has so many kinds of burgers, hot dogs and more. For me, it was a sub sandwich. So tasty! I’m grateful and lucky to live in a place with so much good, local food.

The biggest local adventure I had was last night. Milwaukee legends, Little Blue Crunchy Things, played a 35th anniversary show here at our historic Turner Hall and wow, it was amazing! The crunchies have always had their own style of mixing a lot of musical styles together and it has always sounded so damn good! And their shows have always been such a great time. All about just being there and enjoying the music and peace and love. It’s been many years since I made it to a crunchies show. Last time there was a reunion show, they sold out super fast and I didn’t make it. So this time I had to be there. It was everything you could want and so much more. These guys are an incredibly talented bunch and they haven’t lost a beat in 35 years. It was such a wonderful experience and that place was packed to the gills with fans of all ages from many places and everyone was having a wonderful time. That’s the best part of live music is that shared experience of joy and love. Milwaukee proud, as always. Thanks for the amazing show, guys. Let’s do it again next year 🥳

All right, once again, time for a tip to help handle the blues, blahs, depresso espresso or feeling down. I’m a big fan of extended exhale breathing. There are a lot of breathing exercises out there, but this one is my favorite. It’s great for any situation you need to just feel more grounded. The idea is to inhale for a certain count, let’s say four for this example, hold it for a second or two, and then slowly exhale for two counts or so more than you inhaled, so six counts in this example. It might take a few breaths like this, but try it. It will make you feel very calm and relaxed. This kind of breathing activates the Vagus nerve which is where a lot of negative stress and trauma responses come from and this calms it down. Let me know if it helps!

Going with the vibe of love for everyone, thank you all for being here. Please hit that like button, feel free to leave a comment, send a message telegram, pony express, carrier pigeon. However you feel comfortable connecting, I’m here for it❤️Please hit the subscribe button if you have not already subscribed. It’s the best way to support each other here on Substack and it’s free 🥳

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

So, I was raised Catholic, but I wouldn’t say I’m really religious any more. I think everyone is allowed to believe whatever they choose, so I’m not here to knock religion either. I think I’ve become much more spiritual in middle age and I do believe in God and I would really like to hang out with Jesus, but real Jesus, not made up Christian Nationalist Jesus. I feel like I know and have known many good humans from many different religious and non religious perspectives and I understand why faith is so important, whether it’s religious or not. So being that it is Easter, let me tell you what I really enjoy about Easter now. It means going to my parents’ house and ordering the best Asian food and keeping things low key and I love that. Spending some time with the Lizard fam is good plus add the importance of delicious, quality food and now that’s what I call a good time. 🥳 Once upon a time it meant church services and visits to extended family for dinner that was not always edible and yes, Easter baskets and whatnot. Now it means time with my immediate family, no running around to bad cooking, no more baskets, but shout out to the Lizard Mom for still making us all little bags with chocolate bunnies and jelly beans, and the best Asian food around. It was lovely as usual and I might be heading for a food coma ❤️

With the impending food coma, I am going to get cozy on my couch and watch the last episode of season 4 of Stranger Things. Yes, I’m that far behind 😂 So after watching the first three seasons, which I loved, it took me a while to get back and catch up. I remember that I really love this series and that it is incredibly well done, but what I love most about it are the relationships. These characters have so much love and respect and affection for each other regardless of their differences and they always come through for each other and that is beautiful. Yes, Hawkins certainly has more than it’s fair share of events that the people have to recover from, but the way the characters all come together and care for and take care of each other, that’s the best part. I am always saying how important it is to care for and take care of each other and that’s what I love most about this show. Hopefully, we won’t have to battle any demigorgons or other treacherous creatures, but regardless, we need to take care of each other ❤️

Last, but not least, let me tell you about new music that I’m really enjoying. It’s a band called Fazed on a Pony, which is an incredibly awesome band name in itself, but check out their album Swan. I suppose it’s classified as indie/alternative and I love it. I get behind in new bands and artists often, but I turned on a local station not long ago and this band was on. I believe the song was Wrong Party, so I downloaded the album and I really dig it! So yay for a new band to love and I think you should all go check them out ❤️ Tomorrow I have my next eye check up, so I’ll find out if I need to get some reading glasses or something to get back to books. So more music and book thoughts to come for sure 🥳

All right, time for me to settle in to my food coma and Stranger Things with my onesie pajamas and cats, of course. Thank you all for being here, for reading, for sticking with me and supporting me here. Please hit subscribe if you haven’t already. It’s free and a great way to support Substackers ❤️ Feel free to share this with anyone you think might enjoy it. And as always, hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message, a carrier pigeon, pony express, telegraph or whatever helps you share your thoughts with me 🥳

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading

Liz

Yesterday was a very long day. I was up extra early, especially for a Saturday, to walk to a meeting with my daughter at this business whose back yard basically faces our neighborhood. To say this place has been a thorn in the neighborhood’s side is an understatement. We had many years of peace with the previous business that unfortunately closed about 10 years ago. 8 years ago, this new place moved in and has been a problem ever since. We’ve dealt with noise issues and such lack of consideration for the residents for quite a while. Some of it has improved by your’s truly squeaking and squawking until some improvements happened with the noise. We thought we had found a way to coexist and then about 2 years ago, many cars started parking on our streets to the point of obstructing views when walking or driving and violating so many parking laws it’s insane. We quickly discovered the cars belong to employees of this business, I call it Bastardzone, so we’ll go with that name. The parking issues lead to a meeting in November of 2024 that most of us didn’t know about until a day or two before and was the Saturday after Thanksgiving, so many could not attend. Unfortunately, since that meeting, nothing has improved. In fact, the parking issue are worse. So many of us, not just me this time, have been up in arms trying to find a way to make these idiots stop clogging our streets and endangering our safety. Yesterday there was another meeting. This time, many people showed up and everyone is angry with good reason. I am so proud of Adult Mini Me for speaking up in front of all of these people and shutting down the COO who was giving us bullshit answers and talking in circles with no attempt at resolutions. I am also incredibly proud of my neighbors that showed up in solidarity, not only my Milwaukee neighbors, but lovely folks from West Allis who are also affected by this and just blocks away from us. Many people spoke up and made it clear we will not sit idly by while Bastardzone takes our privacy, peace and quiet and safety and that their lack of solutions or follow through on solutions proposed at the previous meeting will not be tolerated. I got to talk to our alderman about when we can expect changes and what needs to happen to get there which was also helpful. I think he’s finally understanding that this issue is huge and he has to help us because we will not sit down and take this. So shout out to my amazing neighbors on the Milwaukee and West Allis sides for showing up, speaking up and looking out for each other ❤️That is what community looks like!

Let’s talk about ghosting. I am pretty anti ghosting of or by anyone. I think there may be rare occasion where you have no choice, but only after you’ve tried to explain to someone what the issue is or why you feel the need to step back. Some people don’t like to accept things and will keep pushing and then it’s OK to stop responding. You’ve explained and tried to be respectful, so now you can step back without further contact. Ghosting happens way too often these days, but what happens when it’s a long time friend that ghosts you? Has this ever happened to you? I think that’s such a hard thing when someone just stops talking to you and doesn’t explain why especially a friend of many years. I think unfortunately, we get to the point where we have to accept what they’re doing and carrying on, but I also think there is a lot of grief that comes with this situation. There are years of friendship and memories to grieve and that is not easy. I think it’s OK to ask said friend what’s going on and if they would be willing to at least explain to you why they’re making this choice. But I also think we have to ask knowing we probably won’t get a response as sad as that is. I say don’t ghost people. Always try to explain and be respectful when ending a friendship. What do you think? Has this ever happened to you? How did you handle it?

All right, time for another tip to help beat the blahs, blues, depresso espresso, or whatever has you feeling down. Write it out or make a voice message if you prefer not to write. Journaling is cathartic and it helps to write or say things because then you are actively taking the thoughts and feeling and putting them somewhere that is not just inside your head and heart. This is extremely helpful! You can go back and look at it if you want to, but you don’t have to and you don’t have to share it with others. But it helps to let it go somewhere else so you don’t feel trapped with the feelings or thoughts. So write it out, record it out. Whichever you prefer ❤️

On that note. I will say thank you to each and every one of you for being here, for reading, for writing, for supporting myself and each other ❤️ Hit the like button, leave a comment, send a message any time! Please subscribe if you have not done so already and please share this with others who might appreciate it as well. Subscribing is free and a wonderful way to support writers ❤️

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

I watched a bunch of movies this weekend and it was awesome! They were all very good and I’m glad I had the time and took the time to just be and enjoy them. One of the movies I finally watched was Song Sung Blue with Hugh Jackman and Kate Hudson. I absolutely meant to catch this one in the theaters because it is the love story of two of Milwaukees legends, Lightning and Thunder!!!!!! Lightning and Thunder became such legends and are locally incredibly famous as they created a Neil Diamond experience and shared it with the country. They were so legendary here that Eddie Vedder called and asked them to open for Pearl Jam, which they did. He also joined them on stage to sing Forever in Blue Jeans in the 90’s. Lightning and Thunder, also known as Mike and Claire Sardina, still hold a huge place in the hearts of many and certainly earned their place as legendary performers. They had many years of success and made it through some really rough times including when Claire lost part of her leg after a car drove into their yard and hit her, pinning her against their home. Despite difficulties and tragedies, they persisted and had the best time performing as Lighting and Thunder and shared their talents and joy with many. Mike died in 2006 at the age of 55 due to complications of a heart condition he had his whole life. Claire continues to perform these days as Thunder After Lightning and is just as lovely and delightful as ever. This movie told their story, showed their resilience and ability to love and support each other through everything. As a Milwaukeean, it’s extra special to me as I remember these legends well. It was wonderful to see their story told. Milwaukee has amazing history and current stories and is so underrated.

Something I feel like I’ve been reading more about recently and being asked about is how do we make downtime and rest in a society that puts so much pressure on us to be constantly productive? This is a very important issue. We need rest in order to maintain some sort of balance in life, to be able to produce when it’s time, to feel renewed and recharged, to feel good! So why is it so difficult to be OK just resting or doing something that doesn’t take as much energy or that brings you joy without feeling like work? I think part of it is societal pressure. If we’re not doing something that we can see or show to others as Oh, look at how hard I worked, we feel like we don’t measure up. Another part is how we are wired as people. Many of us are told from the time we are small humans that we have to stay busy and that there is always more work to be done, so keep moving, doing, producing. There’s no time for dilly dallying. I strongly disagree and am I big fan of both dillying and dallying. We need actual sleep to survive and stay somewhat sane. Lack of sleep causes people to have terrible mental health issues and can even to psychosis. So physical sleep is a must! Other forms of rest are also incredibly important. To just sit and watch a movie or read a book or knit or put baseball cards in a book. Whatever you enjoy that doesn’t take a lot of energy is important to take time for. Our minds and bodies need to be able to recover and rest. So how do we help ourselves do this? Prioritize sleep for starters. It’s essential for survival. Also, splitting things we think we need to do into categories like here are the things I have to do today and here are the things that can wait, but if I have the time and energy, I’ll do them today. For example, I know tomorrow I have to go to work and do my job which means I have to wake up and get dressed and brush my teeth and pack up my work stuff and some food and go to work. I also have to come home later and wind down and sleep. Things I might do depending on my energy levels, cook food when I get home, dust some places that don’t get dusted often, rearrange some of my totem fauna art pieces so they don’t get knocked off the wall. I don’t have to those things, but I might if I’m feeling up to it. If I don’t, that’s OK! The world won’t end and life will go on if I don’t do them tomorrow and wait until another day. It’s OK to take that time to sit down and eat some food and pet my cats and watch TV for a bit. Give yourself permission to rest and relax. It’s good for you ❤️

One last piece for now and I think I want to try to do this every week as long as I have ideas to share. Tips for fighting the depresso espresso, blues, blahs, feeling like crap, but getting up and doing life anyway. One thing I have found incredibly helpful is finding three things at the end of every day to be grateful for. It doesn’t have to be big things. Just anything that you are grateful for that day. I find writing it down is very helpful and sometimes sharing it with others is a nice extra step. But try it. Every day, once it gets toward time to sleep, write down three things you are grateful for that day. The more you do it, the more you will be able to see all the little things that matter and bring joy and moments of peace everyday. Today, I am grateful for time running errands with Adult Mini Me, delicious sesame tofu, and each and every one of you reading this right now ❤️ Give it try! It helps a lot.

On that note. I’m going back to a Supernatural marathon with Adult Mini Me. Thank you all for being here and for your unwavering support ❤️ Please leave a comment, send a message, a carrier pigeon, a psychic wave about anything, any time to connect. Hit the like button, hit subscribe if you have not already done so and if you know anyone you would like to share this with, please do so 🙏🏻Subscribing is free and a great way to support writing here ❤️

Until next time, please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Thanks for reading,

Liz 🦎

Thank you!

Please be so very good to yourselves and each other ❤️

Liz