Abba’s Beloved,

Sequel to my last letter, which, by the way, if you haven’t read yet, you really should go read it.

I have read that letter at least seven times, genuinely desiring that I see a change. That my lens of view is corrected. And honestly, it has been a steady upward slope, but something changed last Saturday, the 15th of August, and the truth is, I am yet to recover.

I love it.

And I hope I never do.

I attended a meeting, and I wasn’t prepared for how drastically my life would change that day.

God is really good.

God cares about me.

He is relentlessly in love with me.

And this meeting was one of His many ways of showing off and reminding me that He was, and is—very much in love with me.

It’s not always easy to set fire to flames in your devotional life when you’ve been spiritually stunted for a while and you desperately need saving.

This is what happens in times like this: the slippery slope.

Because most times, that decline, that lethargy, that lukewarmness, seldom happens in a day.

It happens from one missed prayer alarm.

It happens from offloading your spiritual calendar by just one activity.

It happens when you miss church because apparently you were tired from Saturday.

It happens when your excuses suddenly become convenient enough to stop you from praying, fasting, or going on evangelism.

It seldom happens in a day.

But the irony of it all is that you can take your life back in one day.

You don’t need to give it time.

All it takes is one day.

One decision.

One flicker of light.

And sometimes, one meeting for your life to instantly change.

Thinking about this, I can see it littered all over Scripture.

It took one day for Peter’s life to change because he decided to follow Him.

It took one day for 3,000 people to be added to the early church.

It took one day!

And just like the way, by one man, sin entered the world, by one Man—the second Adam, Jesus—the whole trajectory changed, and we were saved from a life of eternal damnation.

And for me, my one day was last Saturday.

I’ve had a lot of one days, but this one, in recent times, has been nothing like I’ve ever experienced.

I got into the venue having absolutely no clue what to expect. I had been away from meetings like this for about six months, and what was once common to me now felt foreign.

All my moves were calculated because it felt as though I needed to have done certain things beforehand, or perhaps maintain a certain physical posture, to be able to “tap in.”

So I got in and, like the fish out of water that I felt like, I began to observe.

Gosh.

This was my life.

The gathering of believers.

The fellowship of brethren.

The rejoicing.

The tears.

The worship.

This is my life!

And slowly but surely, God began to remind me of every single thing He had said.

He began to tug gently at my heart and remind me that He had never gone anywhere.

I was the one who had strayed far away.

My first breakthrough moment came when the convener of the program asked us to give a word of knowledge to the person beside us.

Ah!

That’s when I really began to shrug.

See, the gifts of the Spirit, for lack of a better word, na water for where I’m coming from. But I had unintentionally shut that door, and I was very scared to open it back up.

You know, walking in the gifts of the Spirit is like a muscle.

But just like a gym rat starts with one day, my one day had to start today.

So while praying, I trusted God.

Not as some washed-off spiritual person trying to prove that I still had it, but simply as a child.

I trusted Him because it had never been me.

It had always been His Spirit through me.

This was the foundation of my life, and this meeting was the reminder I needed.

Philippians 2:13 was my anchor.

For it is God who works in me both to will and to do of his good pleasure!

And so, I trusted God.

I let go of the pressure.

And I flowed.

I allowed Him to speak through me.

And God was glorified.

Honestly, if that was the only thing that happened to me that day, it would have been enough.

But God was only just getting started with me!

He spoke through the convener, and it felt as though he had hidden a camera in my room and eavesdropped on every single one of my conversations with Abba.

Because tell me why this man was saying every single thing I had discussed with Abba verbatim?

Only this time, they were much more authoritative.

Much more instructive.

I needed to move.

I needed to rekindle my relationship with God.

I needed to return.

And this meeting became my Day 1.

Friend, it has been one week, and I have experienced God in more ways than I have in these past few months.

God is good!

And He has always been.

Sometimes we stray and forget these things because we’ve lost contact with our Source.

I’m not saying this as someone who has figured it all out.

I’m saying this as someone who strayed, but allowed His outstretched hand to bring her back home.

I’m home now.

And oh, what a journey it has been.

Friend, it’s about time you came home too!

Your one day can start from this letter.

If only you knew how much He loved you!!!

Till He speaks again,

His words, through me,to you

The Apostle of God’s love❤

Abba’s Beloved,

How have you been keeping up? Are you good? How’s life working out for you? Have you entered any danfo buses lately? Did the driver test your patience? Have you had uncanny encounters with strangers on the road? Have you questioned your life’s decisions two more times than you should have?

Same. Same.

😂

Lol. What am I rambling on about, you may ask? Truthfully, I also have absolutely no idea whatsoever.
Today, I have no central theme. I don’t have a carefully crafted outline or some profound revelation waiting for a dramatic conclusion. I don’t know what I want to write; I just know that I need to write. So today, we’ll simply flow wherever the pen takes us.

To be honest, my mind has been loud lately. Not noisy, just... loud. Thoughts about my life, my purpose, my relationship with God, and what exactly I’m doing on this earth have been taking turns occupying every corner of my mind.
For some reason, I’ve felt like an unfinished jigsaw puzzle. Not only do I know that I’m incomplete, I don’t even know where the missing piece is.

I’ve questioned my actions. I’ve questioned how I’ve spent these past few months. I’ve questioned the rhythm of my days. And somewhere in the middle of all that questioning, I found myself standing before a mirror asking one simple question:

Why?

Why do you do what you do?

Why do you wake up every morning and go to work?

Why do you wake up every morning and spend your time the way you do?

Who are you trying to please?

What exactly are you building?

And if tomorrow looked exactly like today for the next five years... would you be proud of the life you’re living?

When I audited my dayslike really audited them,I came face to face with a reality that echoed louder than I’d like to admit.

I was living like a fraud.

Oh yes. And before you rush over here to tell me, “Pelumi, you’re being too hard on yourself,” I need you to take a deeeeeeeeeeeeep breath.

Ready?

Good.

Let’s proceed.

There comes a time in a man’s life when he must stand before the mirror of meaning and ask,

“Having been endowed with the courageous heart of a lion, why do I, Oluwapelumi, live like a mouse?”

See, I’ve known that quote almost by heart. The problem wasn’t that I didn’t know it. The problem was that I wasn’t living it. And that realization absolutely wrecked me.

Abba’s Beloved.

Abba’s Beloved...

The fraud.

That’s genuinely what I thought to myself.

The girl people came to for advice. The one others looked up to. The one in whom prophecies had gone ahead. Yet somehow, she was watching the pages of her own life turn while barely reaching for the things God had spoken concerning her.

Did she think purpose would accidentally happen?

Did she think obedience was automatic?

Did she think the life she desired would simply fall into her lap because prophecy had gone ahead of her?

Forgive me. I realize I’ve started referring to myself in the third person. “She” is none other than I, the writer.

I don’t know when I became comfortable. I don’t know when I quietly slipped onto the carousel of the mundane. I don’t know when survival slowly replaced surrender, or when I stopped availing myself to be wielded as a tool in the hands of Abba. I just looked up one day and realized I was living miles and miles away from what had been promised.

And before you misunderstand me, I’m not talking about success. I’m not talking about influence. I’m talking about alignment.

Because there is a dangerous place where your life looks fruitful to everyone else, but your spirit whispers,

“You know there’s more.”

Maybe that’s just me.

Or maybe I’ve accidentally begun reading the transcript of your life too.

Perhaps you’ve felt it as well, the utter dissatisfaction with the state of your life. That quiet knowing that you’re capable of more. Not because you’re trying to prove yourself, but because you’re aware of God’s investment in you. You just know, mediocrity should have no resting place with you.

This isn’t me.

And, this isn’t you either.

We were never called to merely get by. We were never called to spend our lives spectating from the sidelines while purpose waited patiently for our “yes.”
When we stand before our Maker, I don’t want my report to read, “She was comfortable or she just got by- in other news, a “Pass” when you very well knew you had the capacity to have an A.”

Comfort has never changed a generation.

Convenience has never shaken hell.

Coasting has never built the Kingdom.

Somewhere along the line, I forgot that.

But I think I’m remembering again.

I think I finally understand why Abraham could leave everything familiar. Why Moses stood before Pharaoh. Why David ran toward a giant instead of away from one. Why Paul refused comfort when obedience called.

They weren’t extraordinary because they possessed something we don’t.

They were extraordinary because they believed God enough to move.

The man in Christ was never wired merely to exist. He was designed to reveal Heaven, to carry light, to invade darkness, to build, to create, to disciple, to heal, to love extravagantly, and to live courageously.

Maybe this entire letter wasn’t for you after all.

Maybe it was for me.

A wake-up call disguised as a blog post.

A mirror disguised as paragraphs.

A conversation that Abba knew I needed to have with myself.

Because as I write this, I can feel something waking up again.

I’ve grown tired of merely getting by.

There is too much inside me to remain buried beneath comfort.

Too many people are attached to my obedience.

Too many prayers are waiting for my “yes.”

Too many ideas are waiting for courage.

Too many lives are waiting for someone to simply show up.

There is so much the Lord wants to do through me. Yes, there is so little time, but strangely, that doesn’t scare me anymore.

It excites me.

This letter has no beginning.

And perhaps it doesn’t have an ending either.

I only hope that in a few weeks’ time, I come back to read these words. That I stand before my mirror, look into my own eyes, and see less of me and more of Christ. Less of excuses and more of obedience. Less of fear and more of faith.

Because there is more.

There has always been more.

And by the grace of God...

I intend to live like it.

Until next time,

The one endowed with the courageous heart of a lion,

PDR

Abba’s Beloved,

We’ve been apart for far too long.

(In Lady Whistledown’s voice, by the way. I’ve never actually watched Bridgerton, but I felt the need to throw that in.)

I’ve been deflecting from writing for God knows how long and for whatever reason my frontal cortex has managed to come up with.

The truth is, there will never be a good enough reason not to show up here.

We’ve come too far together for me to leave you stranded in the middle of the streets.

Nah.

We’re better than that.

Now that I have your attention, let me tell you why I’ve finally decided to end my self-imposed hiatus.

We always love a good story time, don’t we? I know you do.

Today, I cried. Not the dramatic movie-scene kind of cry. Just the quiet kind.

The kind that sneaks up on you when you’re scrolling through your phone, minding your business, and suddenly life decides to remind you that it is both beautiful and painfully fragile.

I came across a post from someone I know.

Her father had passed away.

May his soul rest in perfect peace.

I watched the video as she spoke about him. The way she spoke about his love. His presence. How she did not need to watch a Super Hero movie to know one because he was hers (feeling this emotion fresh and I want to cry all over again.)

And somewhere between listening to her words and watching her grief, something inside me sank.

Because as heartbreaking as her loss was, another realization sat heavily in my chest:

Our parents are not getting any younger.

And perhaps even more frightening than that?

No one knows tomorrow.

Absolutely no one.

Guys, I don’t know how to write this without getting emotional, but let’s fly.

If you’re anything like me and somewhere around my age bracket, chances are your parents are firmly seated in the middle of their lives.

And while we don’t like talking about it, the truth remains that our time with them is finite.

Not because we’re pessimistic and not because we’re prophets of doom. But because we’re human.

And this flesh is only a warmer before we get our heavenly bodies, so it is bound to pass away.

As I sat with that reality, another thought crept into my mind.

How much of my parents have I spent time appreciating, and how much of them have I spent time analyzing?

Because if we’re being honest, our generation is very good at dissection.

We dissect parenting styles. We dissect family patterns. We dissect trauma. We dissect communication habits. We dissect generational cycles.

And before anybody comes for me, let me be the first to say that there is tremendous value in doing that work.

I am probably one of the flag bearers of the whole “it ends with us” brouhaha.

Healing and recognising dsyfunction is important.

Breaking your way out of normalized nonsense is important.

Growth is important.

But grief has a way of putting things into perspective.

Because when the people you love are no longer here, you don’t miss their imperfections first.

You miss them.

You miss their voice.

You miss the way they called your name.

You miss the way they worried too much.

You miss the things that even used to annoy you.

And that realization sent me down a rabbit hole.

There was a time when I became so focused on identifying what I didn’t want to carry forward that I almost forgot to appreciate what had been given to me.

Gosh.

I used to journal extensively about things I’d never repeat in my lineage.

And at first, it felt liberating.

Like I’d won some sort of independence against unseen forces.

But it wasn’t guarded. And slowly, liberation started morphing into disdain.

Not intentional disdain, just the subtle kind

The kind that makes you focus so much on what’s missing that you become blind to what’s present.

And here’s the truth:

Our parents only did as much as they knew.

And that is about as true as truth can get.

Now don’t get me wrong, my parents are amazing people!

In fact, if I somehow got the opportunity to choose my parents all over again, I’d choose them. Every single time and without hesitation too.

But there’s something that unchecked “wokeness” can do.

What starts as awareness can quietly become criticism.

What starts as healing can quietly become contempt.

And before you know it, you’re spending more time psychoanalyzing your parents than appreciating them.

I don’t even know why I diverted into all of that because I really just wanted to talk about my mum today.

I really, really love my mum.

Like...

A lot.

She’s the best mum ever.

She’s strong.

She’s resilient.

And she has the most perfect close-up thirty-two teeth known to mankind.

Today, after watching that video, I found myself doing something I haven’t done in a while.

I started trying to negotiate with God.

Not because I think that’s how prayer works.

But because there is still so much I want to do for my parents.

I want to give them the world.

Although, when I do that, I genuinely don’t know where the rest of you will stay.

I want to spend time with them.

I want to create memories with them.

I want to laugh with them.

Travel with them.

Celebrate with them.

I want to live a FULL life with them so that when the time eventually comes for them to be with the Lord, there are absolutely no regrets.

Zilch.

Nada.

And my mum?

My goodness.

That woman.

As I write this, she is currently worried sick about her fully grown daughter who travelled to Kano for work and has not returned because the clouds have decided to stage a disagreement.

You would think my sister was five years old.

The funny thing is that she has always loved me and my siblings in these ridiculously practical ways.

I remember being in the market with her years ago after making the terrible decision to handle ata rodo( and to my international audience in English that is ataaa rodooo) with my bare hands.

At first, it was just a sting. Then the sting became a burn. Then things escalated so quickly I couldn’t even say Jack Robinson.

It was a very terrible feeling.

And while I was busy regretting every life decision that had led me to that moment, my mother was moving from stall to stall asking complete strangers if they had palm oil.

Not for herself.

For me.

Ladies and gentlemen, this woman went around an entire market looking for palm oil because her daughter had foolishly underestimated the power of ata rodo.

I don’t even remember how quickly the pain disappeared.

What I remember is her urgency.

The way she carried my discomfort as if it belonged to her too.

The way she couldn’t rest until I was okay.

At the time, it felt normal. Today, it feels like love. I see it now more than ever

The older I get, the more I realize that some of the greatest expressions of love don’t look grand. They look like a woman worrying about the weather because her daughter is travelling.

They look like Vitamin C supplements appearing out of nowhere every other day because apparently they’re good for my skin, nails, immune system, future children, future grandchildren, and every other thing my mother has decided they can fix.

They look like plates of food appearing at your bedroom door on days when you’re too mentally exhausted to function.

Love often looks ordinary until you stop and really look at it.

And I think that’s what today changed for me.

Not because I suddenly discovered that my parents are amazing.

I’ve always known that.

But sometimes familiarity makes us well, familiar.

We assume there will always be another conversation.

Another holiday.

Another opportunity to say thank you.

Another chance to create a memory.

Today reminded me that love should not be postponed.

That gratitude should not be delayed.

That the people who carried us through life deserve their flowers while they can still smell them.

And maybe that’s the lesson I’m taking away from all of this.

Not to love my parents more someday.

But to love them loudly now.

Mom, if you’re reading this:

I love you wholly and fully.

And I will make it my life’s mission to help you live a FULL life.

One so full of joy, laughter, adventure, and love that when God’s timing eventually comes, you rest knowing beyond every shadow of a doubt that you were loved.

Not only in words.

But in action.

In presence.

In consistency.

In every way that matters.

Mamaa,

I love you.

More than my words know how to say.

More than my actions have fully shown.

More than all the palm oil in every market stall in Nigeria.

And as long as God gives me breath, I hope you never have to wonder whether you were loved.

Because you are.

Deeply, fully and completely.

And to everyone reading this: Call your parents, send the text, ask the question, create that memory. Say the thank you. Give that big hug.

Because love is far too precious to leave unsaid.

Welp.

Your fellow emotional human and

Apostle of God’s love still,

PDR❤

Abba’s Beloved,

I’m going to hold your virtual hand as I say this.

You do need help.

And I don’t mean that in the condescending, “something is wrong with you” type of way. I mean it in the most human way possible. The one that reminds you that you were never wired to carry the weight of your life alone.

Even Jesus needed people.

Think about Gethsemane for a second. At the moment where the weight of what He was about to face was pressing in on Him, He called His disciples and asked them to pray with Him.

Imagine that. The Son of God, the One who could be everywhere at once, still invited people into His most vulnerable moment.

And yes, they fell asleep on Him.

But they were still His chosen twelve.

That’s the beauty of knowing your people. Sometimes they will fail you, sometimes they will misunderstand you, and sometimes they will quite literally sleep on you. But that is different from someone who consistently shows a pattern of indifference or disregard for you.

There is a difference between human weakness and a harmful pattern.

So, the first step is simply this: acknowledge that you were never wired to be an existential island.

You need people.

And honestly, if you sit with it long enough, it becomes almost funny to think about. Why did Jesus even need twelve disciples? The One who had all power, all wisdom, and all authority still chose to do life and ministry with people around Him.

But that’s because Jesus came as the modeled man. The second Adam. The blueprint.

So if the blueprint walked with twelve people to accomplish His mission on earth, maybe you also need one or two people to help carry the weight that has slowly made you the hunchback of Notre Dame.

From that acknowledgment comes the quiet dismantling of pride. Because if we’re honest, there is a certain pride hidden in believing we can be sufficient in and of ourselves.

It stings a little to admit that.

But it’s okay. Acknowledge it, dust yourself off, and move forward quickly because over here we’re committed to becoming better every day.

Seide of said this;

Love is not selfish. Love gives, but love also receives. Many times we end up loving people the way we want to be loved, instead of the way they understand love.

That’s why I mentioned in my previous letter that humans are not psychic. There are even realms that “word of knowledge” might not reach, lol.

Sometimes you simply have to be clear.

You have to say, “This is A, B, C. You did X, Y, Z. I understand that may have been your way of showing love, but I didn’t receive it that way. Going forward, this is how I would appreciate your support.”

We’re not in kindergarten anymore. Put on your big girl shoes and have that conversation.

I remember when I needed support for my campaign. I didn’t just hint around it; I created a group and told my friends plainly what I needed from them. And here comes my second point, JUST ASK.

Believe me, it’s not easy at all, especially when you’re a member of the retiring Little Miss Independent association.

And honestly, I’m still not completely over everything that happened around that time.I did not exactly get the response I had envisioned but stiill, it was progress.

It slowly turned from- “I can do this myself” to- “let me message Benita”, she’d know what to do.

Sometimes this struggle even shows up in leadership and delegation.

Not too long ago, I led the content team for an event, and if I’m being honest, I struggled a lot with letting people actually do the work assigned to them. I found myself quietly doing things on my own because I didn’t want to inconvenience anyone. In my mind, it felt easier to just handle it than to keep asking or reminding someone else.

And then there were moments when the delay from someone else would make me anxious, and before I knew it, I was already halfway into doing the task myself.

You know that feeling when you think, “Let me just do it so it’s done.”

But over time I realized something: sometimes what we call efficiency is actually control. Sometimes it’s the discomfort of depending on someone else that pushes us to carry everything ourselves.

And the irony is that when you do that, you rob people of the opportunity to show up for you. You rob them of the chance to contribute, to grow, and to share the weight of the work.

I’m still learning this in real time.

But slowly I’m realizing that allowing people to carry part of the load is not weakness, it is trust.

I had a close friend once tell me that she isn’t someone who reposts or posts people’s work publicly. That simply isn’t how she shows support. But her support showed up in another way, she had purchased from me more times than some friends who reposted my posts regularly.

And that taught me something important.

People are different.

People love differently.

Write that down.

But even with our differences, we are still speaking the same language of love. Sometimes we just have different accents.

And finally, this is for the person who feels like they haven’t found their “people” yet.

I truly believe that in a world of eight billion people, there is at least one person who person plays your heart strings.

I really do believe that.

But something dangerous happens when you begin to write yourself off with conclusions that God never gave you.

Statements like:
“I don’t think I’ll ever have real friends.”
“I don’t think people will ever like me.”

No.

Scratch that.

Replace it with this:
It is God’s will for me to love and be loved. Not just romantically, but platonically too.

Life is deeply spiritual, so why would we separate friendships from the things we bring before God?

If grades were important enough for you to raise a prayer altar and maybe even fast for a week, how much more something as life-shaping as the people who will walk beside you?

I know that might sound extreme in a world constantly plastering “self-love” across our digital walls. But if you truly understand that God did not create you to be an island, then seeking Him for the right people in your life makes perfect sense.

I think I’ve said quite a number of things here.

Sophia, I wrote this for you. And I truly hope there is one or two things in here that help you breathe a little easier.

Till He speaks again,

His words, through me,to you

The Apostle of God’s love❤

Abba’s Beloved,

For the longest time, I have genuinely enjoyed doing things alone. I like eating alone, watching movies alone, name it.

I never really had a phase where I craved friendship, a tight community, or a circle around me. If anything, God was simply being kind when He sent the best people my way.

From my earliest days, I never liked asking for help. I took pride in encountering a problem, going through the entire cycle of confusion, stress, figuring it out, and eventually emerging with a solution, all by myself.

It made me feel capable. It made me feel strong. It made me feel… sufficient.

But lately, God has been calling me out and in the most loving way.

I had a conversation with someone recently, and while we were catching up, I unintentionally mentioned something new unfolding in my life that she didn’t previously know about.

Her response caught me off guard. She said, “I’ve always thought you were one of those independent girls that does everything by herself.” And for some reason, I fought to keep that narrative of me in her mind unerased. And that made me pause.

Why did I find so much pride in being Little Miss Independent?

Let’s unpack it.

I started a business not long ago, and for a while, I struggled deeply with letting my friends know that I needed support.

And oh, I truly did need support. But instead of communicating that, I put out my first post and expected them to read between the lines. I assumed they would “get the cue.”

They didn’t.

So I had one of my usual “God, what’s the way forward?” conversations, and He gently impressed on my heart that if I desired support, I needed to express it. Clearly. Verbally. People cannot read your mind(Note to self 1000 times!).

And that is where I struggled.

Because the thought of vulnerability has always unsettled me. Somewhere along the line, I developed this quiet belief that someone was always out to get me. If you met me in earlier seasons of my life, you might have described me as closed off, maybe even slightly aloof.

But the truth is, I was simply guarding the radar of my heart with excessive vigilance. Get a little too close, and alarms would go off internally.

God began to show me that what I had labeled independence was, in reality, fear. Fear of being hurt again.

Fear of repeating painful patterns. Fear of allowing people into spaces where they could potentially wound me. I had unconsciously given people too much power over my heart and then built guard rails around it, convincing myself that I was simply strong and self-sufficient.

But much to my surprise, I actually did crave to be carried.
God began to show me that what I had labeled independence was not strength. it was fear dressed up nicely.

I was afraid of being hurt again, afraid of repeating old patterns, afraid of letting people close enough to mishandle what I carried. So I built guard rails and called it independence. I stayed self-sufficient and called it maturity.

But the truth I didn’t want to admit was this: I wanted to be seen.

Not exposed. Not dissected. Not pitied.
Just seen enough for someone to notice I was tired.
Seen enough to realize I needed somewhere safe to land.

I didn’t want a spotlight on my pain, but I wanted relief from carrying it alone. I wanted to take off the laser beams around my heart, the silent alarms, the constant scanning and rest in an embrace that felt like a pillow cloud. I wanted safety.

I just did not know how to put that desire into language.

And that was the tension. I wanted community, but I did not want the vulnerability that unlocks it. I wanted to be carried, but I did not want to admit I was heavy.

So I stayed Little Miss Independent.

Now let me talk about my younger sister. She is the embodiment of “my problem is my family’s problem.” If a mosquito enters her room at school, the entire family group chat will be informed.

And I used to get so triggered by that. Irritated. Sometimes even defensive. I would think, When I was in school, I never disturbed mummy and daddy over small things.

God would highlight my reactions to me, but I would brush them aside until one day I finally asked myself why it affected me so deeply.

And the answer humbled me.

She had mastered something I had not, dependency. She knew how to lean into community. She knew how to involve her people without shame.

Meanwhile, I was quietly comparing and competing, framing my silence as maturity when it was really just insecurity.

It was never true pride in independence. It was insufficiency disguised as strength.

For years, I celebrated being the opposite of what God designed to sustain man. Community was not an optional add-on to life; it was intentional design.

My real wake-up call came when God revealed to me that rejecting the help of His people was, in a subtle way, rejecting an extension of His hand.

He reminded me that friends and community are tangible expressions of His love, the version you can see, the one you can feel.

I had never considered it that way before, and that perspective changed everything.

Now let’s be honest — people are still imperfect. There are still wolves in sheep’s clothing. Discernment is still necessary. But God also creates “your people”, those woven from the same fabric as you. And perhaps if vulnerability feels impossible, it may simply mean you have not yet encountered your people.

Because when you do, vulnerability does not suddenly become effortless, but your defenses begin to lower gradually. Their response teaches you whether it is a safe space or a place that requires distance. And that discernment grows with time.

2 Corinthians 3:5 (NKJV):

“Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think of anything as being from ourselves, but our sufficiency is from God.”

Sometimes that sufficiency looks like personal strength, but other times it looks like a friend stepping in, offering help before you even collapse under the weight.

Sometimes God spares you unnecessary strain by sending the solution through a person.

What’s it gonna be?
Little Miss Independent or The one Helped by God!
I recommend the latter plus it has a nice ring to it!

Because sometimes allowing God to carry you means allowing His people to do so too.

By the way- I have something for youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu( In DDK’s voice). There’s a life transforming program happening on the 7th of March and you should be there! Plus, it will be really nice to see youuuu! Register Here

Till He speaks again,

His words, through me,to you

The Apostle of God’s love❤

Abba’s Beloved,

One thing we are definitely not doing this year is ghosting Substack.
Can I get an Amen, friends?

It’s been a whirlwind.
The last time you probably saw me here was around November. I told myself I was taking a well-deserved break… but I think I may have taken it a little too far.

Attending Day 2 of the Visioning Retreat today did it for me.

At the beginning of the year, one phrase kept ringing in my spirit:
“Divine Disruptions. Divine Disruptions.”

I heard it up to four times a day. I didn’t fully understand it then, but God gently walked me back through how my 2025 unfolded, and suddenly,it made sense.

So when DDK kept saying certain things, I was like…
Ma, did you read my life from a script??

Because what was really going on?

If you’ve read any of my letters, you’ll notice a pattern:
I was either in the middle of a storm, about to enter one, or slowly recovering from one.

2025 had me on my toes.
Had my mind running laps.
Honestly? It gave me a full workout. Gosh.

At some point, I made up my mind that I would not treat 2025 as launchpad for 2026. Because if I did, I knew I’d repeat the same cycles and patterns,the ones that made me question everything in the first place.

And God, being the Master Coach, decided to turn 2025 into a full-on coaching moment.

He told me clearly:
“2025 was your year of Divine Disruptions.”

So I began to disassemble my life, shelf by shelf, quarter by quarter.
One storm after another.
And then… I saw it.

Fresh out of university, my plan was simple.

Get a corporate 9–5 as a data analyst.
Live my best life.
Debug queries, write scripts, and still look very good while doing it.

Guys, I was too sure.

Nothing was supposed to go wrong until gbam- it all came crashing down.
God, in His Godness, reminded me yet again that His thoughts are not mine, and His ways are… definitely not mine.

I won’t even lie, I felt like 2025 stole from me.
I felt cheated.
I blamed God.
I questioned His integrity.

I was angry.
I asked Him if I was still His beloved.

Some days were painfully quiet.
My altar grew bleak.
And the One I used to yap about all the time?
I pushed Him out of the driver’s seat.

I decided I would drive.

Guess what?
Nothing changed.

I lost so many things, but in that season, I encountered God in ways I never had before.

It didn’t make sense.
I was at the end of myself.
Too tired to even climb out of the hole I’d dug.

I just wanted everything to end.

And then,
Eureka!

I saw Him.

I thought He had turned His eyes away.
I thought I was too broken, too far gone.

But He saw me and said:
“Have I not said that all things will work together for your good?”

That’s when I remembered the prayers I didn’t even realize I had prayed.

“Lord, You are free to disrupt my plans.”

I remember that night vividly.
Cold air. Outside. Laid flat on the ground.
Overwhelmed by His presence.

So why was I resisting the very disruption I had given Him permission for?

Why was I the barrier to God advancing His will through my life?

It wasn’t until I reached the end of myself that I realized,
He had been there all along.

Every detail.
Carefully thought out.

So tell me, why wouldn’t you let Him disrupt your life?
Knowing fully well that His plans are to prosper you?

See it all balls down to the crux, were you truly ever surrendered?

Did you understand the depth of his sovereignty?!

Do you really acknowledge that his ways are greater and that sometimes we will never ever be able to understand but we rest in this surety that he will never ever mismanage your life?????

Do you really?

Ladies and Genlemen, my 2025 was rocky I’d admit but that’s because I fought disruptions rather than partnering with it!

Friends, the second I gave in!

I took my hands off the wheel, it turned!!!

He turned it!

It didn’t make sense but he did.

Sometimes your desires are not as important as what God wants to do with you and through you.

Jesus told His disciples He would meet them on the other side, but not the way they expected.
Not by boat.
By walking on water.

If you try to negotiate or overanalyze divine disruption, you might end up disrupted by the disruption, instead of being catapulted into alignment.

It’s not everytime that you invite God to your vision board screening after you’ve close the caps of your pen!

You need to let him be the vision board!!

Let him disrupt your ways!!!

Kai, let me know when you get it!!!

Friend, in 2026 Let God do his thang!!

It’s a good time to bring back this 2016 phrase-Let God and Let God!!

And finally, it feels so good to say this and I hope I see you more often in this new year maybe bi-weekly?????

Till He speaks again,

His words, through me,to you!

The Apostle of God’s love❤

Abba’s Beloved,

My Dad is, in many ways, like my Abba.

A provider. I can’t begin to tell you how many times adulthood tried to show me pepper, and my dad said, “Not on my watch.”

A Lover. I have a sweet tooth, and my dad makes sure the sweet jar is never empty. He buys me snacks even when I don’t ask. My favorite ones. I always feel like a princess.

A comforter. I remember the time I got a bad grade. I was deathly scared to tell him because I thought he’d be disappointed. I avoided him for days until I couldn’t anymore.

I expected the typical Nigerian parent reaction, shouting, comparison, “look at your mates!” (I honestly don’t know who sold me that lie).

But instead, he said:

“I’m more angry that you hid this from me. You’ve never gotten a bad grade before. Something happened, yes, but that doesn’t mean you’re a failure. So how do we fix this?”

And friend, ever since that day, I never saw my dad the same way again.
He was different or maybe he had always been that way, and I was just beginning to see clearly.

Truly, the heart of a father is second to none.
That’s why I called this An Open Tribute to My Father.

For a long time, I misunderstood fatherhood.
But understanding my sonship in Abba opened me up to new realities I never saw in my earthly father.

Abba loves me.
Oh, how He loves you and me —
in a way you can’t Ctrl + Copy + Paste,
in a way that’s uniquely yours.

A Father sees you.
Knows your insecurities.
Has seen you in your lowest, weakest moments,
and still, chooses to love you anyway.

That’s God.
That’s what He did.
“While we were yet sinners, He commended His love toward us.”

It’s a love no class can teach.
No course can sell.
No performance can earn.

Please, if you still have your father , one who is whole and hearty, love him.
Because sometimes, their love isn’t loud.
It’s subtle.
Hidden in quiet cues, gentle re-assuring, or those random “Take this urgent 2k — I was just thinking of you.”

Please, love.

But that’s not the point of this letter.

Something happened two months ago.
I had an accident that could have cost me my life and the lives of two children.

I was reversing, and one thing led to another, I crashed into the fence and wrecked my mum’s car.

I couldn’t believe my eyes.
I was hyperventilating, pinching myself, saying, “This can’t be real.”
I felt like a failure.
I blamed myself for everything, for even touching the car that day.

Then from the other end of the compound, I heard my dad shout,

“Is she okay? Someone carry her!”
“Breathe, Pelumi… breathe.”

In my mind, I was doing all the calculations.The damage, the cost, the disappointment.
But in his mind, he only saw me.

His daughter. Alive.

And in that moment, I knew, this is how God designed fatherhood to be.

For months, I dragged the trauma like hand luggage.
Tucked away just enough, but still present.
I was scared of honks, cars, anything that reminded me of that day.

But my dad noticed.

A week later, he said, “You’ll drive again.”
I stared at him.
“Ehn? Me? After destroying the fence?”

He smiled.
And the same of the crash, he rebuilt the fence, as if to say,

“Nothing you’ll ever break is worth more than your peace or your life.”

I didn’t understand then.
But my dad did.
He saw beyond the wreck.

He didn’t judge me by the damage.
He called out the creator in me.

And that reminded me of Abba;
who sees us through our cracks and still says,

“If you broke it, I can fix it.”

Just like my dad did when he rebuilt the fence.

Abba says,
Yes, you went back.
Yes, you messed up.
But none of that changes who you are to Me.

I am your Father, and I will cover you.

Your ruins?
Just raw material in the hands of the Potter.
Wait until you see the masterpiece.

He loves you back into wholeness.

Friend, after weeks of fear, my dad handed me the key and said,

“Drive. You’ve got this.”

And very scared as I was,
his still voice guiding me all the way,
I drove. No crash, no chaos, just peace.

That’s the kind of love that heals.
The kind that rebuilds fences and daughters.

To my Dad, who has modeled Abba’s love in more ways than I can count —
I love you with everything in me.

I’ll ride with you till we both meet our Father in Heaven.

It’s till these wheels fall off, literally.

And yes,

This love and even greater, exists in the bosom of Abba!

Till next time Friend,

His words, through me, to you.

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s beloved,
I’m in an incredibly great mood today and it makes absolutely no sense, so I decided to write to you. Not simply because I feel like it (even though it helps a great lot), but because God told me again, write to you!

Screammmmmmm!!!!!
Yes, that’s how I feel every five minutes because I’m genuinely in awe and constantly wondering how I made the cut for God’s strongest soldiers this year, lol. Anyway, that’s far from the point of this newsletter (or maybe it is!). I’m writing as it goes, and yeah, this is how I actually sound 99.9% of the time.

I was thinking on a rather radical Tuesday and I want to ask you the same questions I asked myself.

Would you take a sword to a gunfight? Or a calculator to an essay writing test? I’d like to think your answer is no — and here’s why.

It’s logical to be prepared for what you’re about to face exams, events, battles. You carry the right things; some call them tools, equipment, or resources. Why? Because it just makes sense.

But I beg to differ on one thing. We are products of wiring. Of patterns and imprinting. Every time we do something that seems “normal” (which actually really isn’t), it’s because we’ve adopted a pattern we saw someone else do. Right?

Okay, I might be getting ahead of myself. Follow me closely.

There are seasons in a believer’s life when you’ve reached the end of yourself — literally. You’re devoid of any strength to do the things that once delightfully fell into your lap.

Suddenly there’s a dryness you can’t explain. You’re tired of everything, everyone; people who seem to have it all figured out make you question everything. You ask: where did it all go wrong? How did this become me?

Here’s a bone for you to pick: who ever said pursuing a relationship with God would be easy? A walk in the park? A bed of roses? A joyride on a roller coaster? Very far from it.

See, you have someone who isn’t rooting for you. Someone who terribly hates your guts. His sole mission is to get you to stumble and renounce God. That’s basically his 9-to-5.

So imagine how he operates on steroids to target every single blind spot, no matter how small. His tactic is slow but sure. I can go on and on about how he hates your guts, or we can skip to the interesting part.

“The devil goes about as a roaring lion…” — notice what the Bible tells you to do? The characteristics: be sober. Be vigilant. Almost like they’re prepping you for a fight. It’s like it’s powered to the characteristics of a vigilante.

“Be sober, be vigilant; because your adversary the devil, as a roaring lion, walketh about, seeking whom he may devour.” — 1 Peter 5:8 (KJV)

A vigilante is always on guard and ready to fight. But you can’t fight without a weapon! Lol. When I got this revelation I caught my foot in my mouth because I had reached a season of dryness myself.

I didn’t want to do anything at all. I kept asking God for strength and He asked, “Strength for what?” Mindlessly I replied, “Lord, you know, strength to fight.” And just like on cue (figuratively), He looked at me and said, “Eh ehn — so now you know this is a fight.

It’s contention. That’s just the start.

But to be battle-ready and win, even though our default is victory , you still need to be battle-ready. And then He asked, ‘Pelumi, where’s your weapon?’ And I’d like to ask you the same thing.

Truly, we’re in a fight. And we need to be fully armed. What’s your weapon? You can’t go to a gunfight with a sword, it’s like you’re asking to be killed.

So here, I’ll tell you where your weapon is:

Your weapon is in prayer! You must pray! I know I’m shouting- but if that’s what will get this message out then hand me the megaphone.

For the weapons of our warfare are not carnal, but mighty through God to the pulling down of strong holds.” — 2 Corinthians 10:4 (KJV)

Our weapons aren’t ordinary — they’re God-powered and cut down the strongholds that you thought were untouchable.-MSG

I just wanted to let you know, cutie, nothing about this is cute. It wasn’t ever meant to be. So get your guard up and fight!

I hope this helps.
Byeeeee

Till He speaks again,

His words, through me, to you,

The Apostle of God’s Love❤

Abba’s beloved,

It’s really been a while here and I have my reasons. Many of which I may or may not be sharing in the newsletters to come (chuckles in: “no be you go tell me wetin I go do 🤣”).

2025 wasn’t at all what I expected. I didn’t have a New Year’s resolution, but for the first time in years, I came into the year knowing exactly what I wanted and by all means, I wanted to achieve them.

What bright, optimistic, ready-to-take-over-the-world Pelumi didn’t realize was that “by all means” also meant “even at the expense of her soul.”

And so I sat long and hard and asked myself: what really is the worth of the world? At the expense of my soul?

📖 A Throwback Story

As far back as I can remember, I was the “good child.” Always got good grades, always put together, the scholar child you’d be proud to show off. I never stole meat from my mother’s pot 🤣, neither did I crave wild parties or experimenting what they didn’t send me to school for.

But there was one thing I consistently craved: academic excellence.

I’d do anything for it. Study all night. Pour myself completely into it. Sometimes, I’d even dream of answering exam questions, what I thought then was “divine expo,” but really, it was the fruit of an idol I had unconsciously built.

Then, I got saved.

And suddenly, the hunger for grades paled in comparison to my hunger for God. Nothing could beat it. And God being God staying true to His word in Matthew 6:33, I was not only top of my class, but He remained the center of it all.

But then came university.

And I didn’t do as well as expected.

Cue the questions: Did I read enough? Pray enough? Was I being too lenient? Or worse… was I substituting God for academics or vice versa?

So I became the balancer of all simultaneous equations: If I read after every class, then go to HOD Ground (a place where we prayed in university) to pray and serve in my service unit….. I’ve hit the point, nothing can go wrong. I did get better grades.

But deep down? My soul flagged an error.

It felt like I had become a trader with God’s lavishness, using Him to prop up the idol of academic excellence I thought I had laid down.

Fast forward to this year — 2025.

This time, it wasn’t grades. It was a job.

I was desperate for a particular one, and month after month it didn’t come. Month 1, Month 2, Month 3. By the fourth, I was at my wit’s end. Angry with God. Emotional blackmail prayers. “Why me?” tantrums.

And one day, on my way to the toilet (yes, God has a sense of humor with His timing 😂), He whispered:

“Does this look all familiar to you?”

Like Paul when the scales fell off, I saw.

For the first time in months, I realized I had slipped right back into the same trap: idolizing something “good.”

It wasn’t academics this time. It was a job.

The Subtle Danger of “Good” Idols

See, here’s the thing: idols aren’t always the “big” things like drugs, sex, or alcohol.

Sometimes, it’s the good things.
The well-meaning things.
The things culture applauds.

But when a good thing becomes a God-thing, it’s already an idol. Even your “good intentions” can try to steal the place of God in your heart.
And anything that competes for that sacred space in your heart? An idol.

One thing I’m learning is this: in God’s time, it will happen.

His will is superior to my most carefully laid-out plans.

Sometimes, we get so caught up in the clock culture sets for us, that we obsess over milestones, jobs, marriages, money and all good things, but all shaky foundations when elevated above God.

Because the truth? Those things have no consistency.
No eternal foundation.

But I know a God who does.

And unlike the idols, He never leaves. He never needs an upgrade. He is complete in Himself.

So friend, let me ask:

• What have you had to let go in order to chase His kingdom? Are you truly living out what it means to seek His Kingdom first? Or is it only an anthem that you recite which

  hasn’t become your life?

• What sacrifice did you have to make to put Him back as number one?

Because our idolatry often progresses.
First, it was grades. Then it was a job. Tomorrow? It could be something else.

But listen: God doesn’t share. And He doesn’t compete either.

It doesn’t have to be a carved statue. Ezekiel 14:3 says:
“These men have set up idols in their hearts, and put before them that which causes them to stumble.”

It’s always been a heart affair.

So today, pause. Search deeply. Who’s really sitting on that throne?
Is it God? Or your idols?

Because, beloved, God is truly the most beautiful among thousands.

Till He speaks again,

His words through me,to you ,

The Apostle of God’s Love ❤

️

|It’s July , Abba’s Beloved.

Welcome to the seventh month. Midpoint. Reset. Refill.(But don’t do this without Jesus).

One thing I can tell you from experience is this:
You cannot pour from an empty cup.

I literally need God to survive — like for real.
I don’t know how to live without Jesus.
It’s extremely hard, and believe me, I’ve tried it one too many times to actually tell you.
I’ve gone to those “I’ll see for myself” phases… and all I saw was that there’s nowhere else.

Where exactly are you running to?
Exactly my point.

I’ve tasted and seen what the world offers.
And while my flesh may try to glamorize the façade,
I can tell you for free …. there’s nothing better than a life sold out to Christ.

It reminds me of 1 Peter 2:16:

“Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves.”

That verse literally read the manuscript of my life.

Because so many times, we start acting like we’re 13 again.
(And yeah, some of you might still be 13, but that’s far from the point.)

We let the flesh speak louder than the Spirit.
We start pressing rebellion like it’s the new normal.
We try to go beyond our template —
The divine mold we were designed in.

And here’s the thing:
It’s cute at first.
The rebellion. The wandering. The independence.
You’re doing you. Living wild.
But time passes… and reality hits.

And you begin to realize:
What really is bondage, is the life you ran away to.
True freedom-is in Christ.

I gave my life to Christ in 2020.
But over the past five years? Let’s just say I’ve had escapades.
At some point, I even started calling myself “the biggest prodigal daughter.”
Cute? Maybe.
Dangerous? 100%.

Because I warped my mind into thinking:

“It’s okay to run away — after all, He always takes me back.”

I’d journal entries like:

“Your biggest runaway daughter…”

And while it sounded broken and contrite, what it was really doing was normalizing my drifting.

I was using my freedom as a cloak.
Just like the verse said.
And that’s a dangerous place to be.

Yes, God is always waiting with open arms.
But don’t start dribbling His mercy like a ball.
Don’t play 2x bet with grace — assuming He’s still waiting so it’s fine.

We’re in a generation of “I’ll see for myself.”
But what the devil shows you is a lie.

It’s like those car mirror warnings:

“Objects in the mirror are closer than they appear.”

Only this time?
They’re more counterfeit than they appear.

Here’s the truth:
You cannot exist outside of the environment you were birthed from.
It’s not bondage —
It’s real freedom.

And I went to see for myself.
And I can tell you without any reasonable doubt:
In God, you’re in the best place.

That’s the honest truth.
I may not have over-the-top or wild testimony stories, but I know for a fact that it’s always better here.

In God, I thrive.
Like literally.

My ideas flow.
My joy is not forced.
My peace is stable.
When my relationship with God is aligned, everything aligns.

My business. My job. My friendships.
Even my content. Even my rest.
Everything excels when my soul is in sync with Him.

And that’s why I’ll say it again:

You cannot pour from an empty cup.

Because sometimes?
It’s not writer’s block.
It’s not a dry season.
It’s not “I’m just tired.”
It’s not that your ideas stopped flowing.
Or that your energy just randomly vanished.

Sometimes, you’ve just been away from the Source for too long.

And once you understand that?
Everything shifts.

Because it’s not just creatives who feel this.
Sometimes the mom who snaps more easily isn’t just overwhelmed- She’s spiritually disconnected.

The student who’s struggling to stay focused?
Not just lazy — just distant from their Source.

The entrepreneur with no clarity?
Maybe it’s not the strategy — maybe it's a lack of stillness.

The leader who’s uninspired and anxious?
Could be that their heart hasn’t slowed down in God’s presence in a while.

We try to diagnose it with hustle.
We label it as burnout.
We blame the pressure.

But really?
It’s an empty cup.

You can’t fake fullness.
You can’t strategize your way around a dry soul.
You can’t podcast, journal, therapy, or vision board your way around absence from the presence of God.

Fellowship fuels flow.
Closeness restores clarity.
Worship realigns your why.

And once you reconnect with the Source?
Your peace returns.
Your joy softens you again.
Your gifts find rhythm.
Your soul stops striving.

So if you’ve drifted, hear this:

God is calling.
Beckoning.
Waiting.

And this time?
Don’t turn back.

Because it is God who works in you both to will and to do of His good pleasure. (Philippians 2:13)

If you’ll let Him…
The Spirit will override the flesh.
And you’ll stay on course.

There’s truly no place I’d rather be.
And honestly? There’s no place you should rather be either.

Welcome home.

Till he speaks again,

His words,through me, to you!

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s Beloved,

There I was — in the passenger seat of my Father’s Tucson.
This “hard girl” ploy had gone on long enough.
Today, my salty tears would have to take me where groaning tongues couldn’t.

I didn’t know how much I needed this — but I did.

It wasn’t necessarily about the depth or gravity of the season I was in.
It was the realization that God saw me — right there, even without words.

And this letter?
It’s for you.

Sometimes, what you need isn't a 7-day fast.
It's not a soulless, intensified 3-hour prayer marathon.
Sometimes, what you need... is a simple, heartfelt cry.

And that’s exactly what I gave Him.

I wore my heart on my sleeve.
I let the weight wreck me — beyond what the frailty of words could carry.
Because God sees. He knows.
Even when I was “praying,” He knew I was acting like I was okay.
And somehow, that moment changed how I view prayer.

“I didn’t know prayer could look like that — salty tears and silent sobs. But when I broke down, I broke through. And that’s when I realized: sometimes, the most powerful prayers are the ones that never leave your lips.

Yes, God knows your heart at every point in time.
But sometimes? He still wants you to communicate it.

I’d told Him in prayer — both verbal and written —
that this waiting season wasn’t a preference.
But I often wrapped those expressions in spiritual language,
as if I had to sound strong even in surrender.

But this time…
I needed to be honest.
Beyond my gut, from the deepest parts of my soul.

The wait had weighed on me long enough to steal the words from my mouth.
So it found another outlet — tears.

It made me see Psalms differently.
Not Psalm 23, the fan favorite.
But Psalm 139.

"You have searched me, Lord, and You know me..."

He knows our hearts — and yet, still desires our expression of it.
You can hide behind shields with people,
but not with God.
And why would you?

There’s a depth of intimacy that is born when you trust God
enough to hand Him your heart in its most difficult, raw form.

David was deeply emotional.
You can feel it in his Psalms.
But it’s not just poetic psalmistry — it’s radical vulnerability.

I can guess Psalm 139:8 —

"Even if I make my bed in hell, You are there"
— wasn’t just prophetic.
It was personal.

David had seen this. Lived it.

And now I’m writing to you, Abba’s beloved —
maybe like David once wrote to himself.

This isn’t something I usually do.
This is the most impromptu love letter I’ve ever written.
But the hard girl/boy ploy has gone on long enough, hasn’t it?

God hears the scream you’re trying to swallow.
He sees how you’re shoving everything down just to save face.

But here’s what He says:

“I am a safe space — I always have been, and I always will be.”

So breathe.
Lean in.
Sometimes all it takes…
is a simple cry.

I see you.

-Abba❤

Till he speaks again,

His words,through me, to you!

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s Beloved,

It’s a new month tomorrow and I know you’ll need this to go into the new month. It’s a breath of freshness - I know this.

The phrase "build up" is littered all over Scripture. I tried to count once—and I lost track. That’s when it hit me: this is not random. When the Bible uses “build up,” especially in contexts beyond the literal—like building a temple or a synagogue—it often points to the believer’s life.

It began to unfold before me:
We are built by God,
Built for God,
Building with God,
And building for others.

Mind-blowing, right?
At the core of the believer’s life is this divine mandate : to build up.

We already know that our solid foundation is Christ.

“For no one can lay any foundation other than the one already laid, which is Jesus Christ.” – 1 Corinthians 3:11

But here’s what many of us miss:
A foundation cannot build itself.

And this is where it gets beautiful. I love how Scripture is so complete, how God uses physical metaphors to explain spiritual truths.
When the Bible says “build up,” it’s not just figurative—it mirrors the actual, tangible process of constructing something.

Think about it:
A house that will stand and have value must have a strong foundation, but also quality materials—bricks, beams, stones.
Likewise, in our lives, the quality of the "bricks" we use will determine the durability, strength, and longevity of our spiritual house.

Isn’t that the believer’s life?

So here’s the question:
Why is it that even after the prayer, Bible study, tithing, and service, it still doesn’t feel right?
And while sometimes, the delay is because God is orchestrating something behind the scenes..."
But other times?
It may just be that you’re building with poor-quality bricks—or worse, you’re not building at all.

Let me explain:

You’re waiting on a job.
You pray daily. Your Bible study is on fire.
But you’re not updating your CV, applying to roles, or sharpening your skills.

Result?
You’re not building.
You’re spiritual—but stagnant.
Your prayers are genuine, but your structure is incomplete.
God may have already pressed “play,” but your inaction has pressed “pause.”

You're in school. You tithe your allowance, you attend church regularly, you fast during exams.
But you don’t study consistently. You don't build learning systems or seek help.

Your results don't match your confession—not because God is unfaithful, but because you're praying over bricks you've refused to lay.

You know you’re called.
You sense it. You dream about it.
But there's no movement:

• You’re not researching.

• You’re not networking.

• You’re not volunteering or apprenticing.

That’s not waiting on God. That’s wasting time.
Even Jesus grew in wisdom, stature, and favor—He built up.

You pray for peace, but you never seek community.
You desire healing, but you avoid vulnerability.
You want emotional growth, but you dodge the hard conversations.

You're asking God to build you up, but you're refusing to carry the bricks of truth, healing, and accountability.

The believer’s blueprint is to build daily—brick upon brick, until the house is complete.
Or rather, until we reach maturity and perfection in Christ.

“And we all, with unveiled face, continually seeing as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are progressively being transformed into His image from [one degree of] glory to [even more] glory, which comes from the Lord, [who is] the Spirit.”-2 Corinthians 3:18 (AMP)

If this daily building isn’t your reality, don’t be surprised when you see delays in places where God has already pressed ‘play’.
You paused the process, and the foundation is waiting—eagerly—for materials to work with.

So how do you build?

“But you, beloved, build yourselves up on [the foundation of] your most holy faith [continually progress, rise like an edifice higher and higher], pray in the Holy Spirit.” – Jude 1:20

“And now I commend you to God [placing you in His protective, loving care] and to the word of His grace [the counsel and promises of His unmerited favor]. It is able to build you up and to give you the [rightful] inheritance among all those who are sanctified [that is, among those who are set apart for God’s purpose—all believers].” – Acts 20:32

These verses show us two foundational keys:

• Prayer (especially in the Spirit)

• The Word

But don’t stop there.

“All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,
so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

The Word is not just to be read—it must be translated into life- your life, into real action- not just a potential but a force that becomes kinetic. That’s your life!

Many times, I’ve found myself rebuilding momentum not because I read something new, but because I responded differently—applying God’s Word to that specific phase of life where everything felt paused. That’s when progress returned.

Here’s the principle:
Give God something to work with.

Even in the miraculous feeding of the 5,000, Jesus didn’t produce food from nothing.
He started with five loaves and two fish.
He could have called down manna—but instead, He showed us something so profound:

God multiplies what you bring.
He builds with what you surrender.
You can’t build a house without bricks.

So it’s a new month tomorrow.
There’s a version of you beyond the routine, pillar-to-post life you’ve reduced yourself to.
Here’s a question for your heart:

Do you have bricks? And are you building with them?

So next time someone asks, “What’s next after salvation?”
You’ll know what to say:
Build.

Abba loves you eternally!

Till He speaks again,

His words, through me, to you!

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Re-routing Your Way Back to God — God’s GPS

Abba’s Beloved,

Today’s letter isn’t the conventional lot — but if you live in Lagos and have zero sense of direction, this one’s for you 😅.

We’ve all used Google Maps at some point, and if you haven’t — well, you must really know your way around life Lagos (please teach the rest of us).

For me? Let’s just say, google maps and I had a situation.

There was a day I had to get to an event straight from my office. I’d seen the location before on my commute, so I was pretty confident — “It’s close, I’ve got this.”

But then this spirit whispered, “Use Google Maps and I’m pretty sure it wasn’t the Holy Spirit. 😭

I trusted that map with all my heart. And for the next 30 minutes, it led me in circles. I was walking up and down Lagos with sweat from the sun that was said will not smite me by day 😭.

At some point, my friend called — “You know there’s a shorter route, right?”
By then, I’d already used up all my walking energy and said in my head, "Wo, that one no concern me again oh — I just want to reach this place, abeg!"

30 whole minutes!

Now you may be wondering — what’s the point of all this?

Hold on. I’m getting there. Breathe. 😌

At a recent meeting I attended , Pastor Debola Deji-Kurunmi said something so profound, it stuck:

“There’s no location too far for God to find you.”

She said one of heaven’s systems on earth is the Global Positioning System. Yes, Google Maps is a heavenly technology on earth, if you really think about it.

Even when you miss turns… even when you’re waaay off track or even 30 minutes away … Google Maps recalculates and reroutes you — until you arrive at your intended destination.

That tiny arrow on the screen? That’s God’s technology of rerouting you back to him.
His positioning.
His presence.
His ability to find you.

Friend, I don’t know where you are.

Maybe you feel like you’ve drifted too far —
You haven’t prayed in months.
You’ve done things that make you feel disqualified.
You’ve lost your convictions, your spark, maybe even your joy.

But please hear me — all that? It’s dilly dally. It’s noise!

God’s arms are not short.

“Surely the arm of the Lord is not too short to save, nor his ear too dull to hear.” — Isaiah 59:1 (NIV)

He can reach you right now, right where you are.
And the best part? He’ll meet you there — not where you pretend to be.

All He asks is this:
Be still.

“Be still and know that I am God.” — Psalm 46:10

I’ve seen that verse in so many lights, but here’s one more layer. Let me break it down using the lyrics of Travis Greene’s “Be Still.”

“We wait on you
Everybody's moving
Everyone is going somewhere
With everything they're trying
Just to make it
To a place where I am not there”

“But when the noise is over
A still small voice you will hear
I hope that you believe me
When I tell ya
That I'll handle all of your cares
Just wait on me”

“Be still and know, that I am God
Be still and know, that I am God
Just trust and know, that I am God
And I'm in control, I am still God”

“Chasing your ambitions”

“Try your best to be the next star
But if it's the attention, that you really want
Then I already know who you are
And I love you that way-ay-ay”

“But when the noise is over

“A still small voice you will hear
To get to where I'm calling you
Calling you, calling you
Just give me your faith and be still
Wait on me”

Whew.
I want you to read that again — one line at a time.

Let it sit.
Let it minister.
Let it remind you that you’re not lost.

You haven’t gone too far.
You are not disqualified.
God’s GPS is still on.
Still tracking.
Still re-routing you… back to Him.

Just be still.

I love you.
Abba does even more.

P.S — A Special Surprise for My Inner Circle 💌

You made it to the end? You’re the real MVP. So here’s the juice:

The Majestic Manifesto 2025: Gen Z Leaders Edition is happening April 19th in Lagos. And guess what?

I did it for you. 😌
Register now using the link below and you stand a chance to get a 100% sponsored ticket.

Don’t walk — RUN!
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You’re Loved!

Till he speaks again,

His words, through me, to you!

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s Beloved,

It’s been what? Like 25 years! Okay, maybe not that long, but I know, I know—I’ve missed you too! And trust me, God has been saying so much. I’m sorry for gatekeeping. Since I last wrote, a lot has changed in my personal life, and I won’t lie—I’ve struggled with staying on top of my relationship with God.

But here’s the thing: Before anything else, God is first our Father. And in those moments when life feels overwhelming, He constantly reminds me that hiding or running away isn’t the solution. Let me tell you something—He will always find you, so why sit it out longer than necessary when you know you’ll eventually return?

I’ll be honest—writing this feels weird. But I need to. And I know someone reading this is in that exact season. God sent me to you today.

Safe Isn't Trust

This is a tricky one for our generation. We’re raising a culture of self-led, independent, intellectual, and highly innovative people. And while that’s a beautiful thing, it can also be dangerous—especially when we fail to recognize the Source.

As believers, we are set apart. We aren’t called to live like the rest of the world. And yet, many of us are experts at curating the perfect life—two-year plans, five-year timelines, strategy upon strategy. But here’s the warning: You didn’t create yourself.

Think about any manufactured product—it comes with a manual. Yet, most of us skim past it, assuming we should know how it works. But if you actually read it, you’d realize something: Either you’ve been using it wrong or you’ve been underusing it.

Now, hear me—this might sting a little. You may think you trust God, but you could actually be playing it safe.

And trust? Trust can’t be half, or quarter, or conditional—it has to be whole. Some of us have been living a 50/50 life. If this doesn’t work out, I have a backup. It’s normal. It’s the fight between our intellect and the call to be, well, a “fool” for God.

Sometimes, we hold back. We hesitate. We want guarantees before stepping into what God is calling us to do. And that, my friend, is where many of us get stuck—spiritually stagnant, yet making progress in other areas of life.

But with God, you’re either all in or you’re not.

Even if this was a game of cards—you bet everything on Him. You can’t hide under the illusion of trusting God while secretly playing it safe and expect to see the same results as those who went all in—those who recklessly followed His leading.

So here’s my question for you:
God says in Psalm 32:8, "I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you."

But first—Will you trust Him fully this time?

P.s For the next couple of days I may or may not be sharing NYSC camp snippets(follow closely and subscribe to be notified as soon as it drops- the OG’s know what to do!)

You’re Loved!

Till he speaks again,

His words, through me, to you!

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s Beloved,

Before anything else, this post was inspired by a short Christian movie, “Awake, O Christian “. If you haven’t seen it yet, you really should—I’ll attach the link below(It’s on Youtube).

This will bless you!

Now, here’s an unpopular way to look at the devil’s entire mastermind plan. He’s cunning, sure, but let me show you how he gets people to do things they don’t want to do—or worse, keeps them unknowingly advancing his agenda. I call it Trick or Treat.

Contrary to what Google says about “trick or treat” starting in the early 20th century, I’d argue it began way back in the Garden of Eden.
Think about it:

The devil’s first trick? Appearing as a serpent and deceiving Eve. The treat? Convincing her that eating the fruit would make her like God (Genesis 3:4-5).

Another time, he tried it on Jesus in the wilderness. He dangled the “treat” of owning the world (as if it wasn’t already Jesus’s!) to tempt Him into submission. Classic trickery (Matthew 4:8-10). You dey whine Jesus?

But my favorite example is Peter. In Matthew 16:21-23, Peter, in what seemed like concern for Jesus, tried to stop Him from going to the cross. Trick: using Peter’s good intentions. Treat: avoiding the cross—which, spoiler alert, would’ve been a win for the devil. Jesus rebuked him sharply, saying, “Get behind me, Satan!” This is so profound because Jesus could see beyond what looked like “seemingly good intentions” because he had and partnered with the Holyspirit at every point in time.

Watching Awake, O Christian Soldier brought this into sharper focus. The devil’s tactics aren’t usually loud and obvious; they’re subtle. As Bible-believing Christians, we think we can discern his schemes easily, but this? It’s deeper than that.

• It's in the subtle way he silently nudges you toward seemingly productive actions at the expense of your prayer time.

• In the subtle way he justifies your late return from work as a reason to skip service the next day.

• He distorts scripture, subtly bringing to mind scriptures like "His grace is sufficient" or "not saved by works, lest any man should boast," making you mistake the voice of the Holy Spirit cushioning your excesses—when in reality, it's the voice of the devil.

Until his subtlety turns into spiritual warfare, and your fire is left flickering. He’s the master of trickery.

Do you see this?

The Subtle Distraction Game

Here’s the kicker: not everything “good” is from God and certainly not everything that seems good is God. I use seems here because in the first place our justification or baseline of defining what is Good is God.

Romans 8:26 says, “We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.” That’s the point—the Holy Spirit is our compass. Without Him, even seemingly harmless distractions can derail us.

In this movie- Awake O Christian, the girl felt the Holy Spirit nudging her to pray for her afflicted friend. On her way, the demon of distraction whispered, “It’s midweek service, and you don’t want to be late.” She mistook it for the Holy Spirit by even thanking him! That, my friend, is the devil’s trick: cloaking his distractions in good intentions.

This mirrors Peter’s attempt to protect Jesus. The devil’s agenda is always the same—to derail God’s purpose. He knows if God’s will is fulfilled, it’s game over for him( and it’s already game over for him!).

Counterfeits That Look Like the Original

This is why 2 Corinthians 11:14 says, “And no wonder, for Satan himself masquerades as an angel of light.”
It didn’t say he masquerades as an agent of darkness but rather the opposite!

His strategy is packaging distractions as “treats” that fit your desires. And let’s be real: his counterfeits often look so close to the real thing that they’re hard to distinguish. That’s why discernment is key.

Friend, these are times when you can’t rely on instinct alone. You need the Holy Spirit. His leading helps you spot counterfeits and stay rooted in truth.

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A Reminder to Stay Awake

Perhaps, you’ve been sleeping and you didn’t know.

Perhaps, his subtlety has turned into warfare in your life.

I want you to know it’s time to wake up!

Wake up Soldier! You’ve been asleep for too long!

Jeremiah 29:11 puts it beautifully: “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you an expected end.”

This is why you can’t let the devil distract you from God’s best. His will isn’t just good—it’s perfect.

So, let me ask:

Do you know the Holy Spirit? Do you know His voice?

He’s calling out to you today. Partner with Him, lean on His guidance, and don’t fall for the devil’s tricks or treats!

You’re Loved!

Till he speaks again,

His words, through me, to you!

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s Beloved,
It’s never a one-way street in the Kingdom.

Have you ever thought about the dynamics of the Kingdom?

• In prayer, how is my weakness exchanged for His strength? (2 Corinthians 12:9-10)

• In a world that celebrates being first, why does the Kingdom declare that the first shall be last? (Matthew 20:16)

• How does a simple fisher of fish become a fisher of men?(Matthew 4:19)

• Why is it that seeking to save your life causes you to lose it, but losing it for His sake brings true life? (Matthew 16:25)

• How does giving freely and scattering lead to increase? (Proverbs 11:24)

• How does seeking God first equal to every other thing being added? (Matthew 6:33)

I’ll tell you why! The Kingdom of God is not a one-way street. When you take time to brood on His majesty and think about how vast God’s wisdom is, these things come to mind.

These, my friend, are Kingdom mysteries. And why am I writing this? Because you’ve got to get to the place where you’re okay with God’s sovereignty—where you can fully surrender and trust His ways. You’ve got to come to that point of emptiness where your "common sense" doesn’t fight with His will or compete for first place.

This is what makes great men. Understanding these Kingdom dynamics might not add up or make logical sense to you, but that’s the whole point. You’ve just cracked the code: the secret to the making of great men.

It might seem simple, even basic, but you need to understand that your ways, no matter how logical or well thought out, aren’t God’s ways. And sometimes, it just won’t make sense. That’s because our minds are limited. We can’t see the full picture, unlike God, who has every single detail worked out—even those moments when we think we’re smarter and go with our own plans instead of His.

Friend, let me tell you: there’s a more excellent way. You can live right. You can avoid mistakes. You can be in the right place at the right time. You can walk in strength. That’s what true submission looks like—letting God be your ultimate compass.

In 2025, Friend- please live your life in complete surrender-knowing that although it may not make sense- God makes sense. You trust him don’t you?

Then surrender!

Happy Official New Year, Friend!

In this new year, I really want to hear from you- do write to me sometime(really).

Till he speaks again,

His words, through me, to you.

The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba’s Beloved,

Phew! This might be a long read and a lot to take in, but I pray for you, friend, that as you’re reading this, the Spirit of the Lord broods over your heart and performs a surgery that even physical doctors can’t do. I pray for you, friend—that you heal!

Ever been hurt before? I have. This isn’t just regular hurt—not the one where your boss is overbearing and steps on your toes-no far from it . This is real hurt. It hits different when you’ve been hurt by those you thought were closest to you, those you felt safe with. I was hurt, and boy, oh boy! It stung deep. I didn’t understand at first that the same part of your brain that processes physical pain also processes emotional pain. Well, now I could relate.

I was hurt by the ones I called friends, and I had all the questions for God. I was everything but okay! It stung deep. I didn’t know how to process the pain. I tried everything, but nothing worked. I didn’t want to harbor bitter feelings toward them, nor did I want to feel that sunken ache in my chest every time I saw them. But it was hard. I just couldn’t move past the fact that they had hurt me.

You know, the reason you’re even reading this is that I went through that pain, and I now look back, thanking God for bringing me out of such a dark and empty place.

Hurt.

Friend, you may ask: What happened? How did you overcome? Are you better?

I kid you not—even writing this, my heart still feels heavy. That’s not to say I still harbor resentment toward them; it’s simply to tell you that healing is a journey. But, friend, you have to heal.

How did I overcome this, you ask? What made the journey easier? One word: Joseph.

Here I was, lying on my bed, brooding over Genesis for what felt like the 10th time, and boom—for the very first time, Joseph’s story hit differently. It wasn’t the usual “even though your enemies… God has a plan” narrative. No. It was the amplification of Joseph’s hurt. This might be the second biggest betrayal in Bible history after Judas’ betrayal of Jesus. Can you imagine being stabbed in the back by your own brothers?

I won’t go into all the details, as that’s not my main point. However, I encourage you to revisit Joseph’s story—Genesis 37-45—especially if you’ve been hurt or are currently hurting.

Joseph was deeply hurt. I can only imagine how he felt seeing his brothers again! The rage, the skin-crawling anger, and the sadness. You could sense his desire for his hurt to be justified. When he first saw his brothers, not only did he speak harshly to them, but he also threw them into prison. And honestly, he had every right. His story was one anyone would deem justifiable. But one thing struck me:

In Genesis 42:18, after three days of holding his brothers in prison, Joseph said, "Do this and live, for I fear God."

And that’s just crazy! I mean, what does fearing God have to do with my hurt, right? It doesn’t make logical sense. “I’m hurt, so I’m justified in throwing them in prison—in fact, doing much worse. After all, it’s a tit for tat.” But here’s what I took from Joseph’s story:

1. It’s okay to be hurt.

2. God understands our frailty and emotional struggles. That’s why He allows us the liberty to hurt. When Joseph returned to the prison after three days, the Bible doesn’t give a detailed account of what transpired. But I can take a wild guess—Joseph must have been in a constant battle with God. Being a man who listened to God and obeyed Him, it must have been tough. Despite his back-and-forth justifications, Joseph knew that God had other plans. This is pivotal: it’s not easy to look past your hurt and say, “Because I fear God,” or “Because God’s Word says so.” Yet that’s precisely what Joseph did. I know it’s hard. Like Joseph, you might need more than three days to wrestle with it, but I pray that at the end of your struggle, you see God as supreme and His Word as final.

3. Don’t let your hurt restrain you.
   Holding on to hurt is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer. Hurt can become a heavy chain, keeping you bound to the past and preventing you from walking in the freedom God intends for you. Instead, let your hurt propel you toward growth and a deeper relationship with God. Seek forgiveness, even when it’s hard. It doesn’t mean the hurt vanishes instantly, but it begins the process of unburdening your heart.

   Matthew 11:28:

   "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

   Remember, forgiving doesn’t excuse their actions; it sets you free. Look to Joseph’s example—he chose to act out of reverence for God rather than the pain he endured. When you prioritize God’s will, healing and restoration follow. Rather than play hide and seek with God- go to him with your hurt- tell him about all the feels! He cares and believe me you- he’s the best therapist! Take it from me.
   

   Thanks for reading! You could also share as you’re led

   Share

   
   I pray for anyone reading this who’s been hurt by family, friends, or a lover—may God begin the healing process in you right now. My prayer is that you, friend, will enter 2025 light and free.

   By the way, my next letter to you will be in 2025. I’m so excited.

   I believe this will bless you, send it to someone you know who needs this. If you haven’t subscribed-you should!

   Happy New Year, friend.
   You’re Loved!

   Till he speaks again,

   His words, through me, to you!

   The Apostle of God’s Love

   

   
   
   

Abba’s beloved,

I’ve been brooding on Hebrews 11 for the longest time, and God has been opening my eyes to see (it will make all the sense once you read it till the end).

We all know the popular Hebrews 11:1:
"Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen" (NKJV).

Chances are, if you asked a believer to quote at least 10 Bible verses, this one would be in their top five. But I think we’ve been too chill with this scripture—what’s that thing they say? Y’all have been sleeping on Hebrews 11:1, and even the whole chapter!

Faith is God-sight—it’s how God makes you see things from His perspective. Faith is the God-given ability to imagine!

I read and heard recently that when God wants you to see something from His point of view, He makes you imagine. This is huge!

You know why God needs you to have faith—this God-given sight? It’s because our physical sight is myopic! We can’t see with our physical eyes what God has in store for each and every one of us.

"But as it is written: 'Eye has not seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man the things which God has prepared for those who love Him'" (1 Corinthians 2:9, NKJV).

The physical eyes are limited. For you to partner and walk with God effectively, you need to be able to see. You need to attune the frequency of your God-sight to God’s plan. The concept of faith itself is oxymoronic: it’s not about what you can see physically, but rather what you can’t see physically.

Abraham – Our MVP for Today!

I’ve always thought Abraham was reckless and irresponsible for having no reservations about obeying God’s command to sacrifice his only son, Isaac. But now it makes sense.

Abraham wasn’t myopic. He wasn’t short-sighted. Abraham could see! He saw—not with his physical eyes, but with his God-sight. I’m getting goosebumps just typing this!

The Bible tells us in Hebrews 11:6:
"But without faith, it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is, and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him."

Abraham’s faith saw something tested and true: the integrity of God’s Word. God promised him in Genesis 21:12:
"But God said to Abraham, 'Do not let it be displeasing in your sight because of the lad or because of your bondwoman. Whatever Sarah has said to you, listen to her voice; for in Isaac your seed shall be called.'"

Even though Abraham was asked to sacrifice Isaac, he trusted that God would fulfill His promise. That even if Isaac died- God would raise him from the dead! (wow) This is reiterated in Hebrews 11:17–19:
"By faith Abraham, when he was tested, offered up Isaac, and he who had received the promises offered up his only begotten son, of whom it was said, 'In Isaac your seed shall be called,' concluding that God was able to raise him up, even from the dead, from which he also received him in a figurative sense" (NKJV).

Faith that cannot behold God’s Word is an irresponsible faith. Abraham’s obedience wasn’t reckless; it grew and was fueled by what he had seen through the eyes of faith.

Faith is Seeing Through the Integrity of His Word

Faith is more than a concept—it’s seeing through the lens of God’s promises. It’s being so convinced of the integrity of His Word that you can bet your life on it.

In 2025, Take Your God-Sight With You

As you step into 2025, align your sight with the frequency of God’s perspective. What can you see?

It’s as far as your God-eyes can see! See into 2025! See that you’ve done everything God wanted you to.

Declare that 2025 was an excellent year, a year of alignment, purpose, and fruitfulness.

This, my friend, changes everything.

Till He speaks again,
His words, through me, to you.
The Apostle of God’s Love.

Abba's Beloved,

Listen, friend, loving God and responding to Him often comes with the realization that there’s suffering along the journey. You’ve had extremely dark moments—times when it seemed like the light at the end of the tunnel would never appear. I like to call these “exceedingly grievous” times, moments when it feels like your very soul is weighed down, even unto death.

A while back, I read something in a book that completely shifted my perspective on “suffering” as a Christian. It said: The thought of Golgotha should drive you to Gethsemane. In clearer words, when challenges overwhelm you, your first response shouldn’t be to glorify the pain or wallow in despair. Instead, it should compel you to retreat to the secret place—into God’s presence.

If someone had told me this earlier in my faith journey, I’d have thought they were crazy. Imagine being told you have three months to live, and someone says, “Go and pray.” It doesn’t make sense, right?

Yet, that’s exactly what Jesus did. When faced with no other choice but to die a gruesome death - He withdrew to pray in Gethsemane. Agonized and sorrowful, He prayed, “O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will, but as You will” (Matthew 26:39). He didn’t ask this lightly. Jesus prayed fervently, even to the point of physical anguish.

But here’s what’s profound: while He acknowledged His desire for another way out, He ultimately surrendered to God’s will, saying, “Not My will, but Yours be done.”

This is powerful. It shows us that while it’s okay to express our pain and seek another way, we must also recognize that God’s will is supreme. Friend, in that submission lies peace.

You’ve likely had moments where you felt like sheep led to the slaughter—not literally, but emotionally or mentally. You didn’t know how you’d overcome or escape. In those times, remember this: The thought of Golgotha should drive you to Gethsemane.

And here’s the best part: the victory has already been won. If Jesus, through His sacrifice, conquered death, then we too can rise above our darkest moments. Death is defeated, and it’s only a matter of time before you step fully into the victory that’s already yours.

You are a victor.

P.s “This isn't what I'd intended to put out,but God impressed it so strongly on my heart and I know someone needs to see this”

You’re loved.

Till he speaks again,

His words,through me, to you.

The Apostle of God’s Love