My dad and I are walking up a hill toward a castle, and we’re both out of breath.

“If I’d known it was going to be this exhausting,” I joke, “I would’ve packed some camping gear. This feels like climbing Everest!”

Dad laughs.

He tells me the castle was built by William the Conqueror and is one of the most famous places to visit in our home county of Dorset.

By the time we reach the top, I’m still catching my breath.

Then I look up.

The crumbling ruins have been standing here for centuries, and all I can do is stare in awe.

At first, It’s hard to believe I’m walking around a place with so much history.

Corfe Castle played a major role in the English Civil War and was one of the last royalist strongholds in southern England. Long before that, in 978 AD, the youngest king ever to rule England was stabbed in the back while visiting the castle… possibly where I’m standing right now.

“King Edward was only sixteen when he died,” my dad says. “So, so young.”

I look out across the countryside instead of saying anything. Rolling hills stretch into the distance. Sheep graze in the fields with their newborn lambs. A few clouds drift overhead, looking almost like cotton candy. For a second, I’m a kid again, imagining myself running through these same fields without a single thing to worry about.

My dad laughs as he remembers the time I spent hours searching for hedgehogs in the middle of the day, not realizing they only come out at night, like so many of the mammals here in the UK. He knew I wasn’t going to find one relaxing in broad daylight but he never said a word.

Oh, I was such a young grasshopper back then.

I’m snapped back to reality when my dad starts walking ahead, encouraging me to explore the ruins of the castle.

I follow him, but something about the moment feels bittersweet. I know our time together isn’t unlimited. Maybe that’s why I’m trying so hard to hold onto moments like this. Because I don’t know when we’ll get another day like it. It’s not that I don’t want to spend time with my family.

Life just gets in the way.

There are bills to pay. Laundry to do. Work that never seems to end. Somewhere along the way, I stopped noticing how quickly the years were passing.

One day I was blowing out the candles on my eighteenth birthday cake.

Just like that, childhood was over.

No more sleepovers. No more Saturday mornings around the breakfast table arguing with my family about who should win Britain’s Got Talent.

Those memories are behind me now.

It’s funny.

When I was younger, I couldn’t wait to grow up and leave home.

Now all I want to do is come back and see my loved ones every chance I get.

“Let me tell you something,” my dad says.

He looks at me, and I can tell he’s trying not to get emotional.

“It’s good to spend time with you.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” I say. “It feels like the good old days.”

How much quality time does the average person actually spend with their family?

I can tell you the answer because I looked it up.

According to a study shared by The New York Post, the average person spends just 37 minutes of quality time with their family each day. “Sixty percent of parents describe their daily lives as hectic, and one in four say that the lack of family quality time away from chores, work, school, or TV is a real problem. The top things to blame are, inevitably, long hours at work, weekends spent doing chores, and the kids’ school schedule.”

I wish I’d known that sooner. Because when I was growing up, I never really thought about how limited our time together was. I just assumed my family would always be there because they always had been. It felt normal. Like there would always be endless dinners together, conversations, or day trips on the weekend.

Life doesn’t really work that way, though. Does it?

I moved abroad when I was eighteen. Phone calls with my parents got shorter due to timezones. Trips back to my hometown became less frequent. Before I knew it, the memories we used to make all the time became something I mostly looked back on.

I still think moving abroad was the right decision. I probably wouldn’t have the writing career I have today. I wouldn’t have met the love of my life, Marie, either. But I don’t think I understood what I was trading away at the time. Then again, when we’re making decisions in the present moment, all we can do is the make the best choice with the information we have at the time.

It’s kinda sad really.

Nobody tells you that one day, the visits home become shorter. That seeing your family starts taking planning, logistics, and a whole lot of effort for something that used to be effortless. And that one day, you’ll find yourself walking around a ruined castle with your dad, wishing days like this could last a little longer.

I’ll leave you with a few lyrics from one of my favorite songs by Trace Adkins:

“You're gonna miss this,
You're gonna want this back,
You're gonna wish these days hadn't gone by so fast.
These are some good times,
So take a good look around,
You may not know it now,
But you're gonna miss this.”

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