“The abundance will come from the depths of your being and not from the height of your intellect.”

Who do you want to be? Not for other people. Not for money or status. Not for comfort. Who did your soul come here to be?

We all want to be in flow. We all want to have a beautiful life and prosperous experiences and lavish flavors of food and clothing. We all have this immense desire to have more than what is currently presented to us. And I actually think those desires are what keep us alive. Imagine yourself having absolutely everything. Imagine the house, the family, the community, the career. Everything you want is right there. Is your desire for more still there? The desire is what keeps us engaged in life.

What’s more exciting, getting married or getting engaged?
What’s more exciting, getting married or being married for 40 years?
There is something about anticipation, movement, and possibility that keeps us engaged. So maybe the question isn’t simply, “What do I want?” But, “What are my intentions behind my desires?”

I used to feel like I was just waiting for that moment to arrive where everything would unlock for me and I’d get the career, the house, the partner, the family, the community, the creativity. Everything would show up. And I would imagine myself standing in line, as if I were in the post office, just standing there waiting for my turn to get the life I wanted. I wouldn’t even imagine myself getting what I wanted. I would just imagine myself standing in line. And the line wasn’t really moving.

That’s how I felt. Like I was just standing in an ordinary line, waiting to get the life of my dreams.

I am laughing out loud as I’m writing this because that is exactly what waiting means. When we’re waiting, we’re not doing anything. We’re not taking responsibility and we’re not blaming others. We’re not trying, but we’re also not complaining. We’re just waiting.

When we’re waiting we’re not engaged. We’re not engaging in our own journey toward our goals and desires. When you’re just waiting, are you even connecting to your desires? I remember shutting down some of my desires because it was too painful to experience them while waiting for them to happen. And I think more of us than we realize are waiting for something to happen before we create movement toward what we want.

Before you can get married, you have to get engaged. Before you get engaged, you have to go out on a few dates. Before you go out on a few dates, you have to show up to the first date. And before you show up to that first date, you have to know what you’re looking for. Then, after you get married, you have to keep your marriage alive by being engaged in the relationship.

There is a flow to connect to and stay connected to.

Desire can lead us to what we want, but many times it leads us to places we didn’t even imagine being in. It’s not really about getting what you want. It’s about wanting. It’s about staying engaged in your own life and in the continuous progress of desire. Sometimes it’s about renewal and about acquiring new desires that can lead you to completely different experiences.

There is a concept that desire is here to build a vessel for you to be able to obtain the very thing you desire. So the more you desire something, the more you are capable of having it. Which means that everything you want is actually waiting for you to be ready to receive it.

Which means you are not waiting for everything. Everything is waiting for you.

If everything is waiting for me, I can start living life from a place of confidence. Because everything I desire is available to me. So I started imagining myself looking at everything I want, and imagining that everything I want is looking at me.

It has been very relaxing to repeat this idea in my head: everything I want is waiting for me. It allows me to keep my desires alive, but not be overwhelmed by them. It allows me to accept the journey. It allows me to expand my desire while being satisfied in the current moment, knowing confidently that this current moment is leading me to where I want to go and beyond.

It allows me to expand my perspective on what is considered possible. It changes the way I show up to my daily routine. I realize that my attitude makes a big difference in my life, and that without fully believing that what I want is waiting for me, I can’t really receive what I want because I don’t fully believe it’s available to me.

And once I believe it’s fully available to me, I am humbled by the idea that I wasn’t grateful for what’s coming. So I expand my appreciation for what’s available to me right now.

It has become very obvious that me complaining about the way things are right now is actually me complaining about everything I want. And from that point, I am delaying the process of receiving because I don’t appreciate the process.

There is something else I’ve been thinking about in relation to all of this, and it brings me back to the first sentence of this article: “The abundance will come from the depths of your being and not from the height of your intellect.”

The more you know yourself and your true desires, the more abundance you can make space for. There is a difference between wanting something because it is genuinely yours and wanting something because you think you are supposed to want it. There are things we desire because they look good, because other people have them, because they will give us status, because they will make us feel successful, or because we believe that having them will finally make us feel like we are enough.

But there are also desires that come from somewhere much deeper.

What makes you feel alive? What keeps coming back to you, even when you try to talk yourself out of it? What does your soul keep asking you to experience, create, become, or give?

I think the more honest we become with ourselves, the more space we create for abundance to come into our lives. When you are authentic with yourself first and foremost, you stop spending so much energy trying to become someone else. You stop forcing desires that aren’t really yours. You become more available to recognize what is actually meant for you.

And maybe that is part of what it means for abundance to come from the depths of your being rather than the height of your intellect. It isn’t about thinking harder about how to get everything you want. It is about knowing yourself deeply enough to recognize what you truly want, and then allowing that desire to create movement in your life.

רצון, ratzon, translates to desire. צינור, tzinor, translates to pipe or channel. What’s the connection between desire and a pipeline?

There is a Kabbalistic idea that by desiring something, you are creating the pipeline through which you can receive it. Your desire is creating the channel. The more deeply you desire, the more you build the vessel to receive what you desire.

But if you lack appreciation and you are consumed with doubt, you are actually stopping the creation of the pipeline. If every time you feel desire you immediately tell yourself that it will never happen, that you are behind, that you don’t have what it takes, or that everyone else has it except you, then desire becomes painful instead of expansive.

So it’s not enough to desire, and it’s not enough to be patient, and it’s not enough to wait. We have to engage with our desire by fully accepting that desire is part of receiving. Desire creates the channel for us to be able to attain the things we want, but we also have to appreciate the current situation we are in.

This moment is not separate from the life we want. This moment is creating the channel through which your desires can come true.

Maybe the life you’re dreaming about isn’t waiting for you to stop being where you are. Maybe it is waiting for you to become ready to receive it. And maybe your job isn’t to stand in line and wait for your turn. Maybe your job is to keep walking, to keep wanting, to keep participating, to keep becoming, and to keep your vessel open.

So, I’ll leave you with a couple questions I’ve been asking myself:

What is my relationship with my desire?

Am I able to stay authentic with my desire?

Stay in touch,

Jasmin

I’ve tried many things throughout my life, especially when it comes to managing personal and professional time. Working for corporate companies that pay a salary rather than hourly can be very flexible, but also very tricky. I’ve been working remotely for the past six years, and that has come with incredible benefits as well as some very real challenges. Think about companies and how they operate, with timelines that outline months and years ahead. There are goals, deadlines, meetings, projects, milestones. So much of our professional lives is built around organizing time.

But how can something as practical as a schedule be spiritual?

If you think about it, time itself is a spiritual concept. For me, mornings carry an intense energy, afternoons and evenings are more mellow, and nighttime has a secret, holy quietness to it. I find myself especially overwhelmed in the mornings if I don’t have a game plan for the day and many things to do. My mind can start running before my feet even touch the floor.

The Jewish calendar is very unique. Each month has its own meaning and energy, and each month connects us to the Creator of the universe in a different way. This allows us to become very spiritual with our time. We are not just moving through the calendar; we are moving through different spiritual seasons.

A favorite idea, and the one that has helped me reconnect with the morning and reestablish a morning routine time and time again, is the concept that God recreates the world every single day.

In Judaism, the ultimate goal is to become like God, to emulate Hashem. God gave us free will as an invitation to become co-creators with Him. So when I wake up every morning at the same time and do things that help expand my energy, I am not just following a productivity routine. I am connecting to the infinite light that is being recreated again.

Another breakthrough realization I had about living according to a calendar, and not according to my work calendar, is that in Judaism, the new day starts at sunset, not sunrise. I’ve noticed that if I don’t have a clear and structured night routine, it is very difficult for me to establish and follow throough on a morning routine. So I started thinking about connecting to the energy of a new day starting after sunset.

A new day starts in darkness.

But darkness is actually very different at night. There is a quietness and a calmness that you don’t get at 10 AM. There is something about the world being quieter that allows you to hear yourself, your true self, rather than the judgmental voice that follows us around. I am one of those people who can literally wake up with negative thoughts in my head. My mind is complaining before my eyes are even open.

So I started establishing a gratitude practice at night. I took the whole “count your blessings” thing quite literally. Every night I write down what I think was the blessing of the day. I am literally counting my blessings. I’ve found that when I count my blessings before I go to sleep, I am doing more than reflecting on the day that just ended. I am setting an intention for the next day. And the main intention is to find the good in everything. To find where God is hiding. Because if I truly believe that God is good, then it is my responsibility to find the good in order to find God.

Over the years, I’ve realized that my schedule and the intention I set for each day and each period of time can radically affect my life. And my life is basically a series of days, months, and years.

If you ask any successful person what the recipe for success is, they will probably mention a schedule. They will probably mention waking up early, before dawn or at dawn. There is an incredible sacred energy in the calm and quiet time right before the sun shines again, right before sunrise.

As of right now, I don’t wake up before dawn. I wake up at 6 AM, God willing. And part of having a schedule is being incredibly forgiving when everything you put on your schedule doesn’t happen. The famous saying “we plan and God laughs” is so real. Because we do plan, and He does laugh. But again, if you believe that it’s all good, then it’s all good.

I used to think, why should I plan if it’s not going to happen anyway? But I’ve realized that part of surrendering is trusting that whatever happens is what is meant to happen. I shouldn’t be bitter about lacking control in my life, because that’s where the magic happens.

Sometimes it’s magical when you have so much to get done and somehow manage to get it all done in a very short amount of time. And other times, it’s magical when everything you planned doesn’t happen and everything you didn’t plan on happens instead.

So why is it important to have a schedule?

It’s not about everything working according to plan. It’s about establishing a routine that helps you reach your goals and build a meaningful life by setting intentions and creating a schedule. Especially a schedule that does not revolve around your work, but revolves around your values and your ultimate goals. Whether that’s wealth, happiness, health, community, family, friends, hobbies, spirituality, or whatever else makes your life meaningful.

Your calendar should reflect what you value.

The Jewish New Year is in about 25 days. The Jewish New Year marks the time when God created the world. So around mid-September, we will feel newness in the air. The fall before winter. The cool air after hot summer months. The excitement of a new energy washing over the world.

This month in the Jewish calendar, the month before the New Year, is called Elul - אלול. It is the time when the Jewish people do an accounting of the soul. We reflect on the past year and ask ourselves questions of repentance: What could I have done better? Where was I successful? What did I miss? What went better than expected?

This energy invites us to reestablish routines, rethink our beliefs, re-challenge our values, and ultimately realign ourselves with our soul’s mission.

We are called to do Teshuva (תשובה), and there are two ways to look at this.

תשובה = answer.

OR

תשובה = to return.

I would like to invite you to look at the essence of both of these.

שוב = again.

“Again” is a complicated act that is required of all human beings. Repeating ourselves. If you are as impatient as I am, repetition can have a negative connotation. I used to ask myself, “How can one person do the same thing for 20 years?” And, “Why do I have to repeat what I already said?”

But the point is that in order to master oneself, you must insist on yourself.

You are asked to try again and again. You are asked to renew yourself again and again. To reestablish a new routine again. To develop new skills again. To do the same thing again and again. Just as God recreates the world every day, so too are you called to join Him in this mission.

There is a secret magic in repetition. Just like the sun repeats itself and the waves repeat themselves. Change happens over time, or sometimes in one second. But even then, there are elements that repeat themselves. We wake up. We eat. We sleep. We breathe. We go to the bathroom. And those ordinary, repetitive things are also opportunities for us to be grateful.

And instead of repetision, we can call it recreation.

There are many ways of interpreting the word תשובה.

But I like this one:

תשובה. שוב. תשובה.

To return again is the answer.

And maybe that is what a schedule really gives us. Not control. Not a guarantee that everything will go according to plan. But the opportunity to return again and again to the things that matter to us most.

To return to our values. To return to our goals. To return to ourselves. And, ultimately, to return to God.

Stay in touch,

Jasmin

One of my favorite teachers used to play with the curtains by the window. He would hide behind them and ask us, “Can you see me now?” He was playing peekaboo with us. Then he would say, “That’s how Hashem (God) shows up in your life.” One moment you feel the Infinite Light, God, right there with you. A second later, you can’t see anything beyond your current situation. When Hashem feels so tangible one moment and absent the next, it can be confusing.

“What do You want from me?” is a question I often ask God. Not because I’m hopeless, but because I don’t understand. I don’t understand how one experience is supposed to lead me to the next. I don’t understand the path I’m walking. Often, I find myself wondering:

What’s the message?

Does that mean I’m disconnected?

It can’t be.

I spend so much time speaking to God, praying. And I often receive answers. All the time.

The realization I keep coming back to is this:

There is nothing missing within you. You are whole. You are complete.

While you’re waiting for the perfect job, the perfect relationship, the perfect house, or the perfect friends, remember: life isn’t about achieving your goals. It isn’t about having everything figured out. It isn’t about things being perfect.

It’s about the process.

The journey.

What you’re learning along the way.

Who you become after each experience you go through.

Love Helps You See

Love helps you see. When darkness blocks my vision, I hate everything I see. I hate myself first of all. I hate that I’m in this situation. I fear I’ll never get out of it. I’ll never push through. I have to deal with it all by myself. And I can’t. Darkness is no joke.

I’m tired. I’m not doing enough. I’m negative all the time. The only way out is faith. The only way out is gratitude. But when you’re in darkness, and your evil inclination, or as one of my clients beautifully called it today, your “anti-soul” is fighting hard, gratitude feels almost impossible.

Connecting to Pain

What happens when we allow ourselves to feel pain? First, we acknowledge it. “I am in pain.” Then comes the question: Does the pain become suffering, or does it remain pain? If it becomes suffering, it usually means we’re resisting the reality we’re in. We want our situation to change immediately. To reduce suffering, we have to return to acceptance. Adding meaning to pain can also soften it. If I tell myself this pain exists only to make my life harder, that there’s no reason for it, the pain becomes heavier. I’ll instinctively look for ways to escape it or numb it.

But if I tell myself: “This heartbreak hurts, but maybe it’s teaching me something about myself, about my childhood, about love, about forgiveness.”

...then the pain begins to transform.

After acknowledging it and finding meaning in it, I need to express it.Even if there’s no one else to talk to, God is listening.

God wants you to call Him first.

Hashem wants to be the first person you call in an emergency. Life is one big problem-solving game, and there are so many ways to play it. As Rabbi Nachman teaches, it’s a dance. It’s just me and God, walking through the forest. The people we meet are simply the trees. We’re all trying to grow.

Maybe these are just growing pains.

Calling God First

The best thing I know how to say is: “Hashem, You put me here. You did this to me. Now help me through it. Take this pain. This pain isn’t mine, it’s Yours. Help me carry it. Solve this with me. If You won’t change this situation, then change me. Change my perspective.

Change my mind.

Help me appreciate what You’ve already given me. Help me see the good in my life and in my struggles. Help me see the light. Strengthen my faith in You. Strengthen my faith in myself. Help me trust that this struggle is for my ultimate good. Help me stay connected to Your timeline. Give me faith. Give me patience.”

When we experience physical pain, the first thing we do is yell, “Stop!” The same thing happens with emotional and mental pain. We cry out to God: “Stop the pain.” Often, the answer doesn’t come immediately. And the pain stays.

In Hebrew, the word די (dai) means “enough” or “stop.” If we reverse those letters, we get יד (yad)—”hand.”

Just when I want to scream to Hashem, די! (”Enough!”), I try to turn it into יד!

“Give me Your hand.”

Because I don’t really want God to stop. I don’t want my life to stop. I want help continuing. Pain clouds our thinking. Pain makes us angry.

The Talmud teaches that anger causes even wise people to lose their wisdom.

“I lost my mind.” How many times have we said that? When you’re in pain but refuse to accept it, your mind tries to protect you. Sometimes through anger. Sometimes by shutting down. But the moment you ask for help, you’re no longer alone. You’re being held by a greater Power. And suddenly you begin to see the light. You begin to understand that this pain can take you somewhere you could never have reached otherwise. Pain teaches. Much of what it teaches is hidden beneath the surface, buried in the subconscious. Pain reveals what was once lost. Pain can reconnect you with your deepest strength. But only with the help of the Almighty.

With the hand of God, we are stronger than we think. תן לי יד השם יתברך.

Stay in touch,

Jasmin

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You can try to fix yourself, but you can't fix other people.

My number one lesson in intimate relationships is this: if you don’t love someone exactly as they are right now, don’t be with them. Because they won’t change.

This morning, while listening to Gedale Fenster, I suddenly realized; that’s also true of Hashem and us.

If you don’t love your life exactly as it is and fully accept it, then you’re rejecting your relationship with Hashem (God), with yourself, and with the life you’ve been given.

You end up, without even realizing it, rejecting the gifts God is trying to give you.

When you’re constantly rejecting what is, you’ll experience life through rejection. That’s the energy you’re living in, and that’s the energy you’re attracting. Don’t reject your life, and life won’t feel like it’s rejecting you.

What does that actually mean?

Don’t resist your job while wishing you had a different one. Don’t hate it. Either appreciate it, leave it, or do both. Be grateful for what it’s teaching you while working toward something new.

When you reject yourself, you’ll experience others as rejecting you. If you reject your body, you’ll always feel like an outsider, and you’ll carry that feeling into every room you enter.

And if you reject the ways of Hashem, you’ll create unnecessary suffering for yourself by constantly resisting what already is.

Acceptance isn’t giving up. It’s choosing to stop fighting reality so you can finally move forward.

What if I said Thank You for the things I hate

Imagine you have a job. You show up every day. People like you. You do a good job, but inside of you there’s a desire to do more. To manage, create, elevate.

You find yourself bored at work. Your soul wants more.

Through that desire, you begin building resentment toward your job. You start imagining yourself doing something else. You look for other jobs, but nothing comes from it.

Six months go by.

There’s a hunger inside of you. It’s becoming painful. You lose patience.

“Why am I feeling this way?” you ask yourself.

Sure enough, you’ve already started losing faith in the journey. You question your position at work. The meaning of it. Its value.

What now?

You’re in a difficult situation. Your coworkers are wonderful. Everyone appreciates you. But you don’t enjoy the work, and you don’t see how it’s adding value to your life or your career. You’re not learning new things, and even when you do, they feel like meaningless skills.

You can’t seem to find another job, and you feel like your time is being wasted.

So you turn to God and say:

“Master of the Universe, please change this situation.”

You have faith that the God you believe in is all good and all giving.

All good. All giving.

But nothing changes.

Another six months go by.

How would you feel now?

What if, instead of looking harder for another job... instead of “accepting” your situation while secretly feeling depressed about it... you started thanking God for it?

Thank You for making me bored.

Thank You for this job.

Thank You for my coworkers.

Thank You for making me face this challenge without understanding it.

Thank You for believing in me.

Thank You for giving me this job.

Thank You for what it’s teaching me about myself.

Thank You for the money.

When you change, you create an opportunity

The moment I step into gratitude, I open myself up to endless possibilities. The moment I stop resisting the process and simply say, “Thank You, God.”

Say it honestly.

Thank You.

I don’t understand, but thank You.

That’s when you allow more gifts to come into your life.

There’s a reason you’re going through whatever you’re going through. A challenging relationship, a job you don’t want, a roommate you don’t get along with, health challenges, debt, or all of the above.

When we say, “Thank You. I don’t understand, but I fully trust that everything You do, God, is for my ultimate benefit. You are teaching me something. You put me in this situation, and I thank You.”

That’s when you allow change.

Movement.

Joy.

You let go of control. You let go of your own idea of how things should be, and you connect to the Infinite Light.

Loving your situation changes everything.

Because now the energy you’re putting out is love and appreciation. You’re opening the gates for blessings to come through.

The energy you’re putting out is gratitude.

When you meet someone who is full of gratitude, all you want to do is give them more.

When you meet someone who is constantly complaining, struggling, and dissatisfied, your heart may go out to them, but they can be difficult to receive from.

Gratitude opens us. Resistance closes us.

Open The Gate

In Hebrew, the word שיעור (shiur) means “lesson.” The word שער (sha’ar) means “gate.”

Notice how they share the same root letters: ש.ע.ר

Within every lesson we learn in life, we unlock a gate. Sometimes multiple gates.

The lessons God gives us become sources of blessing.

Those gates can open new sources of income, wisdom, health, family, relationships, and so much more.

The moment we connect to the deeper knowing that we are here to learn, to grow, to appreciate what we have so that we can receive more, and in turn give more. We stop waiting for life to begin.

We are here to love our lives, not wait for them to be over.

We are here to open the gate for all blessings to come through. May God give us the strength to believe in Him, as much as He believes in us.

Stay in touch,

Jasmin