They flash a flicker of color when they fly and that flicker symbolizes a quick change or spark of something new. This “flicker” of color is what caught my eye as I walked a new trail. I followed and stood watching for maybe 15 minutes, just pausing and breathing in calm.

So much change is happening for me right now and being in nature is comforting and brings me back to center. I’ve been seeking new trails to walk and explore and this one was uphill(!) and bit of workout but held so much beauty and needed solitude. It was synchronicity that our paths crossed.

This flicker was an unexpected and welcome visitor and reminder to ground back to earth and trust the changes coming.

But California is a vast landscape of diverse habitats and one of my favorite places of non glamorous California is the north coast.

The north coast is known as the Lost Coast because of its remoteness, rugged coast, and towering redwoods.

The marine layer blankets the area and cools the air and the land.

Moss clings to anything stationary and slugs abound.

The giant redwoods are like sentries guarding this ancient land.

Walking among the shadowed trails is serene and calming. I feel protected and connected.

It was the end of wildflower season but still saw beautiful carpets of color that made me smile. I didn’t see any pikas (🙁) but pictured them gathering the remaining wildflowers to dry and stash for the coming winter.

Saw moose, bears, marmots, chipmunks, beautiful birds, and lots of deer. I think grumpy marmots are my spirit animal 😉

Nature smacks us down once in a while to remind us how small we are!

I had a harrowing experience with a mountain mudslide that reminded me of this reality.

We were driving in the rain on a mountain road with a sheer drop to one side (and no guardrail) when rocks and rushing water careened over us. It shattered 3 windows in our truck and dented the metal. It happened in seconds. There was no exit ramp, no place to hide. You endure the fury and get the hell out as fast as possible.

We were but one of the storm’s victims. People lost homes to mud and water, cars were washed away, trees were cracked apart. Thankfully, no human lives were lost. But it felt like a whip crack of warning.

It’s moments like these that remind you how small you are on this earth. We are ants, easily squished, easily washed away.

The rush of adrenaline has subsided and the windows are taped up to continue home. All family members are safe and unharmed.

But the aftermath makes you stop and think.

The sheer power of Mother Nature is unstoppable. No matter how much technology and knowledge humans wield, we are no match for nature’s power. We are at her mercy and we forget too often. We do not respect her enough. We do not stop and consider her power enough.

Respect and gratitude are necessary but so is a realistic understanding of our place on this earth.

We are passengers along for the ride, Mother Nature is the driver. Perhaps our mistreatment of her is coming for us.

I back that up with my time and energy. I regularly volunteer 10 hours a week at 2 different organizations. I love the work, the causes, the people, and especially the animals and earth I support.

But dang, it’s HARD work. One job is harder than the other physically. I’m constantly feeding baby birds/animals and because they get fed every 30 min or so, it’s constant rotation and constant attention to what you’re doing.

It sounds ridiculous, but my hand gets cramped from tweezer feeding and my shoulders ache after constant reaching into cages at odd angles to prevent escapes. We get pooped on and constantly cleaning messes.

I’m not trying to sound whiny, but rather, trying to illustrate  the support needed to care for wild animals is no joke!

Volunteers back up the staff and we never have enough volunteers. The staff do double duty in most cases. For low wages, of course. I wish society valued this work more.

We all love the wild animals and want them to thrive so we deal with the hand cramps and the poop messes and the back aches because we know one person really CAN make a difference for that one animal.

We can allow it to flourish in the wild another day.

Allow it to be part of the ecosystem and cycles that makes our earth go round.

Please give your time when you can, the animals and earth need you.

(No photos of cute animals due to facility policies)

My 16 year old loves nature. His goal when traveling cross country to my sister’s mini farm this week wasn’t so much to hold the baby pheasants or feed the goats or collect chicken eggs, or check out the emus, though they were all on the agenda. Nope, his goal was to find snakes. 🐍

Other than the occasional rattlesnake we’d prefer NOT to find, we don’t encounter snakes where we live.

But they knew there were garter snakes and bull snakes at the farm. They were thrilled.

So first morning out they went snake hunting. Mind you, my sister is deathly afraid of snakes so they weren’t joining this crazy hunt, but did offer a snake hook. The fact they even have a snake hook should be a warning to my kid!

My first text of the trip was “Mom! I got bit by a snake!” accompanied by the pic of a huge snake and the bite on their hand. 😳 Ok, granted it was a baby bite.

Now, I should add this kid has grown up with nature, wants to be a park ranger, has volunteered at an aquarium with animals for 5 years, and has been taught to respect nature. Taught how to read nature and observe nature. They know better!

So why they thought they could be a snake whisperer right off the bat is beyond me!

So after reassuring me it was not venomous and “yes mom, I washed it” off they went searching for more.

I told them next time respect the snake and look but don’t try to pet. We can guide them but only hope they will listen!

Maybe a future zookeeper or indeed a park ranger?

So much wildlife is out in the open because there are less people to compete, less human interference. The eagles were soaring everywhere and had a nest near our cabin and would sit above us in the trees talking! Media would have us think they squawk loudly and harshly (those are hawk sounds) but in reality, they are chirpy and the sound is lighter, higher. This made me think of them a bit less fierce but still acknowledging they are a strong bird of prey. There were 3 adults and 2 juveniles and it was such a privilege to be present with them. At one point they soared over me and I felt the wind of their wings ruffle my hair and the whoosh whoosh of their wings was felt deep in my heart. It was a feeling of pure joy.

There were many BIG moments with whales and bears and eagles, but also many small beautiful moments with mossy trails, tiny mushrooms, mountain lupine, and waves rolling up the shore.

The whole visit was such a beautiful reminder of nature’s beauty and wonder. And that we must protect it, now more than ever. These relatively unspoiled lands are necessary for the health of our earth. We can’t let them be harvested and destroyed for profit. Our future depends on our voices and actions now.

But the upcoming Summer Solstice and longest day is rushing at me and I feel unprepared, unsettled.

The year is half done!

I have accomplished so much and not enough. As usual.

I have so much gratitude for my life but also looking ahead to many big changes and those changes are shadowing the summer. Shadowing my confidence.

I stood at the ocean last night and watched the waves. Waves I could not control, the setting sun I could not slow.

I took a breath. And another.

I grounded.

I remembered I need to live in the now and step out from the shadows. Not worry about what I can’t control.

Letting go is not easy.

Trusting is not easy.

But embracing each day is getting easier.

At age 35, and about 6 mos pregnant with #3, we moved to Washington State with little thought or preparation. It was a sudden work opportunity and we jumped at it before thinking too hard about it. I think I was subconsciously ready for a change and yearned for more like minded people, aka “crunchy” at that point in the early 2000s.

As we drove around the area of our new home, on the edge of the Puget Sound and the Cascade Mountains in the background, I was immediately and forever in love.

We had never visited Washington, had no relatives or ancestors here, and no connection prior to the move.

But I felt so strongly like I CAME HOME.

Even as the sunny summer season changed to rain and clouds, I loved it still. The dreary weather to others was comfortable to me.

There was a heartbeat in the land, a pull to the wild mountains and the soothing ocean. I connected with nature like I never had before, it was magical.

After 4 beautiful years, we had to leave this special place and return to our previous home due to work.

I’ll never forget talking to a neighbor as we left about feeling like this was my home now and how much I’d miss it. And I missed it SO MUCH. I lamented often over the years how much I missed it.

Fast forward almost 20 years, almost yearly visits back to the Washington coast, and now living in California. I attended a workshop with a mentor and she was discussing the ancestors of the land and the “home of our hearts.” I felt this immediately about Washington and understood exactly what she meant. The Pacific Northwest, Puget Sound, and the mossy green landscape will forever be the home of my heart.💚

I may not be there physically, but it will always be with me, a feeling of peace and wildness that I’ve only felt in this special place, alive with spirit and wonder. I can connect with it when I need it through meditation and just touching the land. The land is connected from wherever I am and spirit is all around us, waiting for us to be open to listening. My heart will always be tethered to the sacred land of Puget Sound and Washington.

Do we clean or do we rest? Do we fit in more festivities or collapse in a heap?

The holiday decor has lost its luster and excitement and is now a chore to pack up. We strive to resist the crush of media on resolutions and weight loss.

We feel pulled in multiple directions.

Stop spinning and breathe in, breathe out.

Repeat.

Repeat.

Only you can refocus your compass.

Listen to your heart and slow the waves of distortion.

Decide to soften as the year closes.

No indecision, no debate.

Give yourself grace.

It may be the shortest day and longest night but it’s also a soft turning of the wheel of the year. If a season could be compared to nature, this is cocoon time. And as the season progresses, that cocoon shell gets thinner and more light seeps through. Each day gets a tiny bit more sun after the solstice and it may not be noticeable at first, but eventually we feel it and want to stretch and awaken. We can feel the season progress and take the rest we need but we see the increasing light leading us to spring and gives us hope for renewal and rebirth.

It’s a threshold to the turning of the year and I love it. 💙

The Winter Solstice feels more like the start of a new year to me than Jan 1. I think it’s because it’s a bit like turning a corner, but slowly and without specific direction. No rushing and no demands. It’s nature holding space for us to rest and renew.

I’ve celebrated winter solstice in a variety of ways over the years such as baking and reading books when my kids were little. Some of our favorite books were:

Owl Moon by Jane Yolen

The Tomton by Astrid Lindgren

Winter by Gerda Muller-a little picture book with no words but a favorite of ours

The Winter Solstice by Ellen Jackson

We also made lanterns out of cans and poked holes in the sides to let the light of a candle shine through. We often made strings of popcorn for birds and hung bird feeders we made from pinecones and oranges. The solstice can really be special time with kids and reminding them of the cycles of nature and connecting them in ways they can understand.

More recently I gather with friends and we enjoy a meal together and then craft something sacred and special. One year we made these lovely jar lanterns with herbs and I still have it years later and it hangs in my backyard. A favorite thing we make is a collage candle. We get a pillar jar candle and modge podge pictures, words, and sayings from magazine cut outs onto the glass. It’s an intention candle for the new season and the new year. We’ve done this for the last 5 years or so and I love these candles so much.

A few adult books (because I love reading and have to share books) about the Winter Solstice include:

Yule rituals, lore and recipes for the winter season by Llewelyn

The Old Magic of Christmas: Yuletide Traditions for the Darkest Days of the Year by Linda Raedisch

The Winter Solstice: The Sacred Traditions of Christmas by John Matthews and Caitlín Matthews

✨✨Wishing all a blissful and restful Winter Solstice✨✨