Where This Started

When I started this Substack account in conjunction with launching my Spirituality for Skeptics podcast, I had every intention of publishing a minimum of one article per week.

I had taken the last year off from working after selling and fully transitioning out of my last business, while figuring out what I wanted to do next. I was feeling fresh, excited, and eager to create again.

The Up-and-Down Ride

As it can often be, this has turned into an up-and-down ride.

Previously, how I operated was that stuff got done no matter what. Internal deadlines and expectations of myself were the biggest driving factors of my everyday behavior.

Now I’m in a place where I don’t have that stress or pressure, or really anything to keep up with in a way that affects anyone other than me.

A combination of this and long-term burnout recovery has led to less consistency on this platform than I would have liked. That said, I’m proud to say I have published an episode of my show every single week since November 11th, with no signs of slowing down.

There’s a Lot of Magic Happening

There’s a lot of magic happening in my world right now.

Nine months in, I feel like I have developed amazing connections and relationships through this process, found much of my creative spark again, and am really beginning to trust the path that is unfolding for this next phase of my life, even if it isn’t totally clear yet.

I was walking my dog and thinking about all that I’ve learned, and decided to write my first article on here in a long time to share my top five lessons with you. I think, regardless of where you’re at and what you’re doing in life, these are useful things to integrate and remember.

So here are my top five lessons from the past nine months, going from a multi-million-dollar business owner to selling my company to taking time off to navigating my new path. I would love for you to share what sticks out for you. ❤️

Lesson #1: Rigid thinking plus attachment to old belief systems will stop your growth and keep you from walking your highest path and receiving your highest truth.

I realized that I had operated from a certain mechanism for so long, both in my fitness studio and in my business coaching practice, and that absolutely none of it applied to what I’m trying to do now.

But I held on, thinking that the numbers should work in a certain way at a certain pace within a certain time, and that it should be measurable and something I could easily architect through my old way of efforting.

Wrong.

I am more open than ever before to not only changing how I do things, but also changing the stories that I tell about them and what and how I believe things need to happen.

I am in more trust than ever before that things are working and unfolding exactly as they are supposed to, even if it’s not in line with the script I wrote.

Lesson #2: Magic is orchestrating itself behind the scenes when you are in alignment, in trust, and doing the work... even if you can’t see it yet.

Recently, an opportunity fell into my lap that I still don’t quite understand. It’s huge, actually... and one I will be sharing more about soon!

Spirituality for Skeptics is still very much in its infancy, even though we’ve seen decent growth over the past nine months. So when this opportunity came up, I couldn’t help but wonder, “Why me?”

Energy works in mysterious ways, and so does the unfolding of your path.

Follow the signs, lean in, and trust.

Lesson #3: Knowing who you truly are becomes more important at every stage of growth.

Growing bigger, both in audience size and in your ambitions, requires a next level of self-awareness.

Not just because self-awareness is an important quality, but because people are going to try to tell you who you are without having any clue. If you aren’t certain, it can really mess with your head.

Almost ten years ago, I had an experience of other people telling me who I was, which wasn’t actually true at all, but it made me question everything. I honestly still feel the trauma of that in my body when I think about it.

The bigger your ambitions, the more projections people will have, and you need a strong shield for all of this.

Lesson #4: You are really the only one deeming yourself unworthy or unqualified.

The guests I have on my show are truly extraordinary people doing big things. They are people who:

• Have been in their game for decades

• Have authored many books

• Have big followings

• Are go-to experts thousands of people around the world seek

The first few months of doing my show, there were so many conversations where I felt unworthy of sitting on camera with the person across from me. And I can’t tell you how many of them gave such high compliments on the quality of our interview and happily shared our work together.

This is an important note: Focusing on improving your skills as you grow is absolutely critical.

I am so much better at doing my research, preparing my interviews, and conducting the conversations than I was even just a few months ago. I am so proud of that.

But even if you’re just starting in whatever venture you’re working on, you will always be your own worst critic. Well, of the ones that matter, anyway. There will always be haters and trolls. 🙂

Lesson #5: If you’re a content creator, a lot of it is not going to make sense.

People like me and many others are putting out high-quality content that will drastically change people’s lives if they tune in. I have an editing and production team, and so much thought is put into everything.

Yet…

People filming themselves eating grotesque amounts of food are surging with millions of likes and followers and big content monetization. I really don’t understand that part of humans, but I suppose I understand the entertainment and voyeuristic aspect.

It’s shallow and wide. Real connection and impact are narrow and deep.

The lesson there is to know which game you’re playing and commit to it no matter what the metrics across the board show. Don’t let the numbers sway or shake you.

Bonus Lesson: Your biggest haters and critics know nothing about you, will never take the time to learn, and will form judgments you can’t control.

Let me tell you. Some of the comment sections on clips from my show that I have shared have really shown me all the things I dislike about humanity in one place.

Assumptions, judgments, and hate spewed toward people off of a 45- to 60-second clip. Name-calling, wishing horrible things, and worse.

I used to want to always be right and fight back with this kind of thing, but I’ve learned that if someone is going to assume they know everything about you, what you stand for, and what you believe from that time frame (and knowing that they are unwilling to do their research and that there is no openness to learning), it’s futile.

When you want to fight, simply block and delete instead.

Where I Am Now

Nine months in, are things where I hoped they would be the day I launched my show? Absolutely not.

But am I in trust that it’s working out exactly as it’s supposed to, and better than I expected? For the first time, I can say yes.

There are still many things to be determined and many pieces of the puzzle that need to come together, but I have fallen in love with the process of this and with my creativity again. And more than anything, I’m grateful for the people and relationships I have developed as a result of doing this work. Those are priceless.

My biggest challenge is learning to measure success differently than I have before. Old patterns die hard, as they say.

I’d love to hear from you... What are you working on right now? What are you finding to be your biggest challenge or lesson? And if any of these resonated for you on your journey, I’d love for you to share that as well!

🎧 Continue Your Own Transformation

If you haven’t yet listened, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics on YouTube or any podcast platform. Be sure to subscribe to have new episodes sent directly to you!

📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

Thank you, as always, for being here. ❤️

With love,
Nicole

Back in 2012, when I opened my fitness studio and for the years I owned it, hustle culture became all the rage. 5am morning routines, who could outwork who, sun up to sun down mentality.

I remember hearing Gary V talk about how you can build whatever success you want in the hours available to you outside of tending to your kids and your full-time job, at the cost of only a few hours of sleep per night.

And I ate it up.

Then I read The 10x Rule by Grant Cardone and decided that was the way I was going to be. So much so I even got “10x” tattooed on my wrist.

That was my life for years. I lived, breathed, and even dreamed hustle, grind, and success culture.

Building the Business

During the last year I owned my fitness studio before I sold it, I also started working as a fitness business coach. I ran a business AND had a job that required a lot, and I loved it.

For the first few years of having my business coaching practice, I:

• Ran every group coaching call (up to 6 per week)

• Coached all my 1:1 clients (about 40-60 calls per month)

• Took every sales call (40+ per month)

• Did all the marketing and interim client support

Outside of a few contractors, it was just me.

And it was…fine.

Honestly, I was thrilled that the business grew so quickly, felt like I was really helping people, and was making more money than I ever thought I’d see in my life.

Little by little, those tasks changed but my focus never did. As the business grew, though, so did the pressure.

When the Pressure Started

Suddenly I had $100k in expenses each month, and even though I always maintained high profit margins, the pressure to pay those bills AND ensure I could continue to month after month for an unlimited amount of time became a heavy burden to bear. Which is strange, considering paying those bills was never a problem…literally not once.

I loved what I was doing. I was proud of what I built. But I began craving a different way of life, which ultimately resulted in the sale of that company.

Here’s What May Surprise You

I regret none of it.

Now, who I am and how I am available to operate is so far removed from that, but going through that phase was crucial to both who I am now and having the ability to soften and explore without the need for hard work.

My core values have shifted away from achievement and high earning into peace, exploration, and presence.

But here’s the thing…the grind and success I built over nearly 15 years is what landed me in a place where I have created enough security for myself to where I’m able to live the curious, quiet, low-pressure life I’m living now.

When I reached the point where there was nothing left for me to prove to myself or anyone else, that’s when I finally gave myself permission to just do what I want to do because I want to do it.

Giving myself the gift of financial security was the most important part of my journey into real freedom. Others may not feel this way, but it’s true for me without question.

The Tension Between Two Worlds

The current state of my life looks like it’s at odds between the high-achieving business side of who I am juxtaposed with the spiritually curious content creator and podcast host.

The spiritual side often says that softness, ease, flow, allowing, feminine, etc., is the way.

The business side promotes masculine, strategy, action, focus, and discipline.

They feel so separate, but both are required for the bigger picture of what we’re trying to do in any area of life.

If I’d always been in my softness or receiving era, I would not be where I am. I’d have to be working hard for money, and my freedom would be limited. I wouldn’t have been able to travel for weeks or months at a time to 35+ countries. I wouldn’t have been able to step back in a big way, catch my breath, and allow for what’s next to reveal itself.

All of that to say, I am most thankful for the version of me that hustled for the better part of 15 years (although I honestly started working that way as a teenager) so that I was able to land where I am today.

The Pathway Most Won’t Talk About

I made sure I was safe, secure, and protected BEFORE operating in the way I do now.

And I think that’s the shift people are either unaware of or afraid to talk about.

The business person fears losing their edge if they soften or change the way they operate.

The spiritual person has been told that hustle culture is bad and the only way is to allow.

Neither are true. But there is a pathway that needs to be followed if you TRULY want it all.

I will always argue that it’s security first, THEN freedom, ease, and passion.

There are components of freedom and peace being an inside job, but it doesn’t change the fact that you have to earn money to be able to live in our society.

And if you don’t solve for that, everything else is so much harder.

You can’t soften your way into freedom if you’re still scrambling.

Security, for me, was the prerequisite for deep and focused spiritual exploration.

I’m not saying that is the way it will work for you, but my point is to emphasize that if you figure out financial safety and security, everything else is easier.

Wherever You Are Right Now

If you’re reading this and you’re in the hustle phase right now, that’s okay. If you’re burned out, know there’s an endpoint.

If you’re reading this and you’re in your soft phase, that’s okay too.

But if you’re spiritual and guilt-ridden about wanting money, stop. It’s not unspiritual to build security.

My hope is that my experience helps provide clarity or maybe even a roadmap for you to get where you want to go: financially, spiritually, emotionally, operationally, and in every other way.

Where I Am Now

I’m not 100% where I want to be yet either.

I go through waves of consistency with my own practices where I’d love 100% commitment, and I’m learning that patience rather than discipline is one of my most important lessons in this phase of life.

Hustle has its time and place. So does ease. It’s about knowing when it’s time for both.

This requires being able to sacrifice what you want now for the bigger vision you are working toward. It also requires knowing when enough is enough on either edge, when it’s time to make a shift.

So, friends, which phase are you in now, and how did you know it was time to shift?

🎧 Listen & Connect

If these reflections resonate with you, you will enjoy Spirituality for Skeptics, where I explore themes like identity, surrender, and growth through honest conversations and real stories.

📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics 🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

Thank you for sharing this space with me and for being willing to look at your own patterns with honesty and curiosity. ❤️

With love, Nicole

I’ve been thinking about the ways in which humans cause our own suffering.

Before I dive in, let me be clear. I do NOT have this all figured out. These concepts are much easier to appreciate as theory than they are to put into practice.

But as I grow myself emotionally and spiritually, one tiny step at a time, this feels relevant for me right now, as it will for others.

What does it mean to NEED nothing in order to HAVE everything?

What We Actually Need

Let’s think about the things we need that are non-negotiable. These are not the things I’m talking about:

• Food

• Shelter

• Water

• Money to keep us comfortable, safe, and able to pay to live

• Healthcare

• Safety

I probably missed a few things, but you get where I’m going. It’s the stuff required for survival.

But of course, none of us just want to survive.

We want to expand, explore, connect, have freedom of choice, and feel purpose and fulfillment in our daily lives.

Wanting More Than Survival

How we get to these places differs a lot as well.

For some people it’s with their children and family. For others, it’s in their work or in nature. I’d guess for most people it’s a combination of multiple avenues.

And when we talk about need versus want here, the intent isn’t to minimize the importance of these wants. In fact, I’d argue for most people reading this, without achieving these wants, survival would feel pointless.

Where “Need” Actually Shows Up

So, being out of NEED so that you can have everything comes down to this, from my experience:

It’s all about how we interact with others.

What we expect from them. What we project onto them. How we judge them.

This can be in any relationship dynamic with other adults, from your romantic connection to your family members, friends, or coworkers.

We all live and see life through a heavily filtered lens backed by a loud, ever-running dialogue in our heads of thoughts just about every waking moment.

Therefore, our interactions with others come from our personal interpretation of everything, from right and wrong to how someone else should be.

The Subtle Ways It Shows Up

I don’t think we usually even realize when we’re doing it…

Giving unsolicited advice.

Passing judgment, quietly or loudly.

Projecting our values onto someone else.

I know it’s all stuff I have done and continue to do.

The Work That Creates Peace

I’m working to raise the awareness of all of this in myself, both for the sake of making relationships in my life even better and, even more so, to shift my personal experience into even deeper peace.

Because that’s what you’ll get when you do this work. Peace.

It doesn’t mean you won’t get triggered or feel sadness or grief. We’re still humans having a human experience, of course.

But when you lower your expectations of others and don’t press them to be anyone but themselves, and when you can detach from the behavior of others, everything starts to shift.

Choosing Without Needing

You be clear with yourself that you CHOOSE the relationship with that person, but you don’t need it.

Within that frame, it allows both you and the other person to grow.

And when you can accept that growth will either bring you closer together or have you drift apart, and when you can be okay with either outcome, that’s where the magic of true personal emotional and spiritual freedom lies.

It lies in the deep trust that the universe is working with you for your highest good and for your greatest growth.

Letting Go of Control

So much of the need we experience is from other people, who we can never control, no matter how much we try if the relationship is healthy.

If we can give others the autonomy they need to be who they are and DETACH, life will never be the same.

Absolutely have boundaries and values and communicate them clearly and often.

But listen, stay open, be flexible, and seek growth over comfort or control.

Understand that everything has seasons in life. Some relationships will evolve through different seasons and last a lifetime. Some seasons will end when it’s their time.

What You Can Actually Control

The experience you create and the meaning you make of all of it is what you can control.

And if you can find peace in chaos around you, especially detaching from how others behave, it’ll feel like you uncovered the secret to life everyone is looking for.

I would love to hear your thoughts if you’re willing to share in the comments!

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these ideas more deeply, you can listen to Spirituality for Skepticshere:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re exploring your own path of growth, awareness, and deeper peace, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

I have always seen spiritual gifts as just that. Something you have or something that you don’t.

My mentor, Romy Wyser, has such a clear channel to her spirit guides. Mediums I’ve interviewed on Spirituality for Skeptics have an open line to departed loved ones that’s easy to access.

While I can appreciate the fact that I have undeniably received divine guidance through my life and clearly see it in hindsight, the channel to spirit doesn’t necessarily always feel accessible to me.

And even when it kind of does, like a pull to select relevant oracle cards or when I get an amazing download, I always question if I’m just making meaning from something or if it was coincidental. Most often my default thought is that I’m just making things up.

You can see why I decided to start my show with such skepticism and doubt! I started Spirituality for Skeptics for people like me. Believers with doubt who are looking to formulate their own belief systems. Hearing the stories and teachings from my guests is definitely helping me do just that.

The Role Psychedelics Have Played

I haven’t talked about it much, but working with psychedelics, always with a therapist or guide, has been probably the most impactful part of my spiritual journey.

I used to think that maybe it was just substances that were making me think, see, and believe certain things in those sessions. I even discredited the validity of what I’d receive even though it all felt true and real in the moment.

I’ll never forget when my friend and guide who has sat with me most often during this work said to me, “It’s just like once you’re in it, everything opens up for you, and you’re just channeling.”

It really made me think because I didn’t think that was something I could do. But it was kind of true. I would use language that isn’t typical for me and share thoughts that didn’t feel like mine. Often what would come to me would be in the form of “you” and not “I,” feeling like something else was speaking to me.

The more I read and learn about the science of how psychedelics impact our brains and consciousness, I realized that I’m not just making stuff up but rather that the medicines change our state of awareness and allow the things that inhibit us from tapping into spirit to step aside. (This is a very poor explanation, but I’m keeping it as simple as possible!)

Learning to Receive Without Medicine

These journeys have been so instrumental in my growth, but over and over I’ve received the message that I can communicate with spirit without any type of medicine.

I know that consistent practices of meditation, connecting with my guides, working with cards, automatic writing, etc. are what help develop that connection.

Admittedly, sometimes my brain is too busy to receive anything, but more often I do get downloads when I do the work. Sometimes I do five minute meditations and have to stop before they end because I’ve gotten so many downloads I want to write down before I forget.

Now that the stress of running and selling my last business is becoming more and more distant in the past, my nervous system is in a much more receptive state to allow me to really dive into these practices.

Which is why I not only continue to work closely with my mentor of the last five years, Romy, but I also decided to take a class on channeling to learn more of a process to do it for myself.

The Pull Toward Something New

Two weeks ago, I interviewed one of the most incredible people I’ve had the privilege of speaking with. MaryAnn DiMarco. She’s a renowned psychic medium who is grounded and LEGIT.

I was reading her books beforehand while prepping for our interview, but speaking with her one on one, I just can’t explain it. I was totally drawn into her.

After we stopped recording, she asked if she could channel for me and my producer Glenn, and she was spot on with everything that came through.

I don’t know why but after we got off the call, I went to her website and booked in for an upcoming group series of classes she’s teaching starting April 1. I didn’t even read what was on the page. I just paid because I knew I needed to learn from her.

I can’t explain the pull, but I’m so excited to learn from her in this setting.

My goal is not working as a psychic or anything like that. My goal is deeper trust with myself, my practices, my spiritual communication, and a greater understanding of how it all works because my logical brain needs that.

I NEVER thought I’d be looking to learn this kind of thing in a formal setting, but now that I’m committed, I am so excited to see how it integrates into my journey.

(Side note: MaryAnn’s episode on my show airs April 14 - do not miss this one!)

Seeing the Guidance Clearly

I took my dog Mila to Hawaii for a few weeks in February, and ever since we arrived through to the moment I’m writing this, I’ve just been in a space of overwhelming gratitude for my life.

I see the guidance so clearly in hindsight, and I’m grateful to the past versions of me that acted on it.

I don’t know where these classes are going to lead me, but I’m grateful for having them as part of my next steps.

Is there anything you thought you’d never do that you’re finding yourself thinking about at this moment?

I’d love for you to share!

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If you enjoy these reflections, you’ll likely enjoy the deeper conversations happening on my show.

You can listen to Spirituality for Skeptics here:

YouTube
https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics

Instagram
https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics

TikTok
https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

Thank you for being here and walking this path of curiosity, questioning, and exploration with me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

Sometimes the universe sends you validation and encouragement when you need it.

Last weekend I was on the horrifically long trip back from Kauai to Asheville. Three flights. The first departed at 10:30pm and I didn’t get picked up from the airport until 7:30pm the next day.

My Oura ring clocked me at 44 minutes of sleep. This is typical for me because I cannot sleep on airplanes.

So after the five hour flight to LAX and a three hour layover, I was hoping I would be tired enough to drift off.

I watched some shows I had downloaded on my iPad, but as always when I travel, having my dog Mila with me struck up a conversation with the man sitting next to me a few hours in. He was also an animal lover.

He asked what I did for work, and I shared how I had sold my last company, took a year off, launched a podcast, and am waiting for what else is next to become clear.

Then he asked about the podcast, so I shared about Spirituality for Skeptics.

I had no idea the magical conversation that would evolve.

A Life Shaped by Spiritual Pursuit

I’m guessing he was around 60 years old, in great shape, and a very successful businessman.

He told me that in his 20s he had lived as a celibate monk, learning from a mentor for five full years in spiritual pursuit. He became a well known spiritual teacher during that time as well.

All of it changed one day when a beautiful woman he had never seen before walked into his place of work.

He knew immediately she would become his wife.

And she did. For 32 years.

They were both always very spiritually inclined, so when she was diagnosed with cancer, they had long conversations about the beauty of the life they built together and how she would communicate with him and send him signs from the afterlife.

She passed seven years ago, and with tears in his eyes he said to me that she had given him the greatest gift a human can receive: pure, unconditional love.

Now with a tear streaming down his cheek as he described it, she told him to go and share that love with the world.

I held back tears myself and am doing so even now writing this and remembering the power of his emotion.

Questions Without Easy Answers

He shared that he hasn’t received the signs they discussed, and I could tell it made him question everything he believed.

(Side note: I conducted an interview yesterday with one of the most incredible people I’ve had the privilege of having on my show, psychic medium Maryann Dimarco, and asked why this happens. She had a beautiful answer. Her episode releases in April.)

We discussed the likelihood of reincarnation, the purpose of the soul’s journey, and deep topics that are rare to connect with a stranger on a plane about.

He shared that the biggest lesson he has learned from his years of spiritual study and practice, combined with the loss of his wife, is the power of bringing love and kindness to the world.

And it showed.

There was an energy about him as I sat next to him before we even spoke. I was just so tired at that point that I didn’t pay it much attention.

But wow. I was so energized after our conversation and so very grateful for that opportunity and connection.

A Reminder About the Work I’m Doing

It reminds me how complex and layered every life on this earth is.

How we all have hopes, dreams, disappointments, pains, grief, and hidden traumas. We all experience all of it.

The depth and caliber of the conversation also made my work with Spirituality for Skeptics feel incredibly validated and important.

Like these are the conversations humans are meant to be having at this time, and that I am so grateful for having the opportunity to lead some of them.

Podcast growth, as expected, is soooooo different than growing the types of businesses I am familiar with. Doubt comes up often.

Jeff, this stranger, unknowingly gave me the gift of remembering how important this work is that I’m doing.

I’m so thankful for the hours I spent next to him on the plane.

And I’m so thankful to you for reading this. ❤️

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these ideas more deeply through conversation and storytelling, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re committed to growth, awareness, and creating meaningful change one decision at a time, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

I’m currently on a hiking trip with my dog in Kauai, and even though I’ve done thousands of hikes, I had one the other day that taught me a powerful lesson on perspective.

I was coming down toward the end of a trail, and there was a large tree down in the middle that was difficult to navigate. I needed to help Mila around it first, then figure it out for myself.

Most of the trails here are out and backs, and it’s the rainy season, so I’ve been doing the muddiest hikes of my life too.

I was dreading coming back to navigate this tree for the second time, but when I was almost back to my car, I realized I hadn’t encountered that obstacle again. It was the same trail. I was just moving in two different directions.

Not just two different directions, but operating from two different perspectives.

On the way in, I only saw the obstacle. On the way out, a new perspective apparently allowed me to see not only a new way around it, but a whole part of the trail I didn’t see the first time.

The obstacle had been one of the most challenging parts of this hike, and then suddenly it was like it didn’t even exist.

What Are We Missing When We Stay Fixed?

I’ve shared many learned lessons through the years, but this one has really been sitting with me.

How many times do we allow ourselves to become frustrated or limited by our current perspective?

How often could we release ourselves from burdens, discontentment, or stuck patterns if we were just willing to shift perspective? To see things differently?

I can tell you…clearer and easier paths with far less resistance will start to reveal themselves.

When we believe that there’s one way, the only way, that’s when we’ll find ourselves most limited. That’s where we’ll actually inhibit ourselves from creating what it is that we want or what is truly meant for us.

Where This Has Played Out in My Life

There were many times in business where I would get so attached to how something was supposed to play out that I wouldn’t even notice when something unexpected turned out to work even better.

I’d focus on what wasn’t working that I wanted to work. I’d focus on the obstacle, not the opportunity.

My current relationship has also taught me these lessons in a powerful way. Eight years ago, when I initially met and dated my boyfriend, my life perspective was completely different, to say the least.

He was wonderful then, and I loved being with him then. But it couldn’t have lasted. I’ll speak for myself and say that I needed to grow and evolve in many ways, definitely including in my perspectives.

Now, we’re coming up on a year of reuniting romantically. We always stayed close friends. And my experience of our dynamic now is completely different.

Sure, we both were growing and changing a lot through the years, but it’s my perspective change that’s allowed me to feel confident in both myself and our connection, detached from the outcome while very hopeful, and substantially less need for how I expect him to show up as anyone other than who he is.

Perspective shifts across all areas of my life have allowed me to become the happiest I’ve ever been.

Gratitude for the Version of Me Who Pushed Through

But oh my gosh, do I look back at the past versions of myself and say THANK YOU to her!

She worked so hard. Stressed so much. Had sleepless nights filled with anxiety. And many wonderful things happened too.

But she hung in there. Did what she had to do.

And now I’m here…

Doing my passion project with Spirituality for Skeptics.

No other obligations. Traveling. Hiking and working out. Going for nice meals. Being generous with those I love and with causes that call on my heart. Spending ALL THE TIME with my precious Mila.

Hawaii has me showered in gratitude. For the past versions of myself. For this life I created that I get to live. I truly can’t believe this is my reality, and it blows my mind every day.

I started dreaming of this type of freedom 20 years ago with no idea how I’d ever end up here, but trusting that I would little by little.

Shifting my perspective on what’s possible created a successful business that I sold.

It created a relationship that I love being in.

It created deeper purpose and connection.

And it allowed for more freedom than staying attached to an old perspective and way of being could have ever allowed.

Next time I see an obstacle on a hiking trail, whether real or proverbial, I’m going to zoom out and remember that I’m only seeing it one way in that moment so that I can stop and ask, what else is possible?

How about you?

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these ideas more deeply through conversation and storytelling, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re committed to growth, awareness, and creating meaningful change one decision at a time, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

What Do You Want?

This is a question I used to ask my business coaching students from day one.

They needed to be crystal clear on their goals from specific numbers to the emotions and textures of their dream life and business.

I still believe that’s true when it comes to building a business.

I was even part of a mastermind group focused on mental programming where we would literally spend hours in a room talking about getting clear on what we want.

I preached clarity, focus, consistency, and vision over and over again. On repeat.

And I knew what I wanted. Where I was headed. What the business was going to accomplish.

Being that clear felt so good, honestly.

I never imagined myself as someone who wouldn’t be clear.

And I definitely never thought I could shift out of high drive motivation, building something big, and 10x-ing my life. (I’ve got a 10x tattoo on my wrist to prove it😆)

I prided myself on being the Consistency Queen.

Look…those parts of me still exist, but I’m writing this article today to demonstrate how things can change. How new, unrecognizable patterns can pop up as the old fade away.

When Old Patterns Start to Fade

My goal with Substack, where I am at this moment in time, is to help others navigate big seasons of change on their spiritual journey.

Not all old parts of you will die to make space for the new.

I’m writing this article during my second morning in Hawaii. (Hello 3:50am wakeup jet lag!)

Writing and running a business while traveling is something I did for years. In 2025 it wasn’t something I would have been able to stomach during my burnout recovery. In fact, I traveled internationally three times for a total of over two months in 2025 and didn’t bring my laptop once.

But here I am writing again…not out of obligation, but because I believe I have something valuable to share.

The Vision Question

Going back to the vision piece…

It’s a lot easier to show up, feel motivated and inspired, and get stuff done when you actually know what you’re trying to do. Imagine that!?

As I’ve shared before, I know where I want my show, Spirituality for Skeptics, to go.

Outside of that, I plan to share some of the major, life-changing tax elimination strategies I’ve gotten into over the past few years at some point.

And beyond that…no clue.

Clarity Isn’t Always the Gift

On my first hike yesterday through the lush green mountains here on Oahu, I started feeling really excited about my future again.

Not because I know where in the world I’m going…but because I felt into a place of gratitude and acceptance that I don’t have to.

As a high achiever who gets the biggest thrill from chasing goals and achieving them, not knowing what’s ahead has been really uncomfortable.

But yesterday, as I was climbing the mountainside, I thought to myself for the first time in a way that created excitement that the lack of clarity is such a gift.

I felt butterflies in my stomach over the idea of just learning and growing and taking all the time needed to feel into what’s next.

Honestly, I’ve been creating a lot of my own suffering with the pressure I put on myself to have it figured out. To live up to the belief systems I held and preached that used to work for me but no longer do.

Permission to Be Unclear

This isn’t the most coherent piece I’ve ever written, but I think the point is that I needed permission to be unclear. To let things unfold. To TRULY surrender. To wait and watch and listen and allow.

If you’re going through a big identity shift or life transition, maybe you need that permission too.

As a former preacher of clarity, I’m saying now: It’s ok to be unclear. And I know now that you cannot force clarity, no matter how much you try, if it’s not in alignment for you.

We must trust in Divine Time.

I’d love to hear from you in the comments if you’re in a big transition or if you’ve gone from being clear and focused to…well, not! 🙂

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these ideas more deeply through conversation and storytelling, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re committed to growth, awareness, and creating meaningful change one decision at a time, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

I want to share something I set out to do a few weeks ago…

And how the universe flat out told me “NO!”

I’ve been so energized by my work with Spirituality for Skeptics over the past 3 months, and as a result, I’ve had a lot of my creativity coming back online after a multi-year drought.

It wasn’t that the creativity was completely gone. It’s just that it would come in bursts. It wasn’t a sustainable flow like it had been for many years as a result of stress and burnout.

Naturally excited by feeling creative flow again, I decided behind the scenes that I would do a 30 day content challenge for myself.

I outlined it as:

• 1–2 IG, TikTok, and YouTube posts per day

• 2 types of stories per day

No big deal, right?

For a moment, I enjoyed focusing on capturing more moments of my daily life and sharing my lessons.

After a week or so, I started feeling the slight urgency and pressure I felt for so many years that led to dysfunctional ways of operating whispering at me.

But once I say I’m going to do something, I do it, so I ignored my higher self’s request to abandon something I said I was going to do.

And then, the universe stepped in.

Savannah. Then sickness. Then snow.

First, the threat of a massive ice storm came for the southeast, sparking concerns of days to a week without power. After having been through Hurricane Helene here in Asheville in September 2024 which left us with weeks of no power and months without running water, that experience in the middle of winter was a big NO THANKS for me.

So, the day before the storm, I suggested to my boyfriend, Jade, that we head down to Savannah, GA where there was no threat of ice.

Side note: I lived in the historic district of Savannah 11 years ago right after I separated from my ex-husband, before I sold the fitness studio I owned about an hour away, and before moving back to my hometown of Asheville, NC. I cannot tell you how much I love being there. How special and nostalgic that place is. Even though it was unusually cold for the area, I’m so glad we went.

Let’s just say being out of my routine threw my intended content challenge for a loop. I still shared stuff from my show, but I wasn’t going above and beyond to create more content the 4 nights we were there.

I thought…I’ll get back to it when I return home.

The day I got back, I came down with a severe cold with a fever.

Then, another winter storm. We got 5+ inches of snow in Asheville which happens maybe once every 5 years.

I rode out the storm at Jade’s house, again, out of my routine. But let’s just say by that point I heard the universe’s message for me loud and clear:

“Rest. Don’t run.”

My old operating system doesn’t believe in rest

My old operating system says that’s not safe.

That I’ll fall behind.

That Spirituality for Skeptics will never become what I want it to be or have the impact I know it’s meant to have.

And honestly, I’m not convinced that there’s not truth to doing more creating better results, because that’s what always worked for me.

True or not, I absolutely cannot operate under that system as I move forward.

In fact, my creativity shut down and I found myself just wanting to post the bare minimum, the wildly opposite intended effect I had when I decided to do a content challenge in the first place!

I know I was provided with financial security via my last business to allow me to learn a different pace, operating system, and to just do and be different in ways that serve me in this next chapter of life.

I can explore and figure it out without financial pressure, and I’m endlessly grateful for that. But it doesn’t automatically cancel out the patterns that feel natural and that have worked for me in the past.

Here’s the pivot I’m choosing now

So what do I do from here? I create out of excitement and inspiration, not out of obligation of a content calendar and schedule I wrote up.

I listen to what I’m being told over and over again: rest, don’t run.

I trust that my show will get where it’s supposed to go without me overworking or overstressing.

This stuff is so hard for someone who likes to control the outcome and who excelled at business strategy and taking action. It’s an entire part of my identity I’m choosing to alter.

Do I fully believe this new way of being will get me better results than my old ways?

Honestly, no, or at least, I don’t know.

But what matters more is that I just can’t. As a high achiever of decades at this point, feeling like you just can’t is so strange.

Here we are though. I’m embracing it and even leaning into it.

I’m letting my body and energy guide my actions each day. I’m also letting them reveal what’s true rather than creating stories with my mind.

What a ride I’m on.

I’ve literally rebelled against a plan I created for myself, haha! But at least I feel good about it! 😂

Have you experienced anything similar?

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these ideas more deeply through conversation and storytelling, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re committed to growth, awareness, and creating meaningful change one decision at a time, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

I used to think that success was created through one big breakthrough…

You go to an event that changes everything for you.

You go viral.

You have a big awakening or revelation of the one thing you need to know to make all the difference.

This can be related to personal or spiritual growth, business, etc.

The Moment That Changed My Perspective

Back in 2017 I attended Unleash the Power Within with Tony Robbins. It’s 4 days that are about 16 hours long. High energy, fire walks, connection…

You leave feeling like you can accomplish anything!

But I remember sitting there amongst over 10,000 people thinking to myself: How many of these people are ACTUALLY going to experience major changes in their lives or sustained breakthroughs?

I knew everyone hoped for it but that most wouldn’t sustain beyond maybe a few weeks because I’d had that experience myself after other events. All I knew was that I wanted to be one of the few.

Where I Was at the Time

When I attended the event, I’d parted ways with the last job I’ve ever held about 6 weeks prior. I knew where I was heading with the company I wanted to start. I believed in the vision but knew there were no guarantees of success.

I believed in myself, too. Well - kind of. At this point I’d built and sold a fitness studio successfully and had gained respect in that community as someone who knew what they were doing, which translated well into my business venture.

But the years in-between selling that business, working a job in business coaching, and starting my next business were challenging for my confidence.

In that time, I’d gone through:

• Divorce

• The woman who bought my fitness studio closing it down within 6 months then filing bankruptcy to try to get out of paying me (I took her to court and won)

• A job that was once amazing that I’d given everything to turning into what felt like an abusive relationship

• Building a home and wondering if I’d be able to afford it after leaving the job and launching a new business

What I Actually Took From That Event

That Tony Robbins event was a turning point for me, but not for the reasons I originally thought.

I went into it thinking the event itself would change everything. I left the event knowing that I had to sustain that energy, focus, and drive to create the change myself.

I launched my company 6 weeks later on January 2, 2018, made over $250k my first year, and hit my first 7-figure run rate month within 21 months. I also sold that company within 6 years.

If November 2017 Nicole could only know what I know now, all of that fear and feelings of doubt and being lost would have faded away.

The Real Question

So…how is it that we create these kinds of results for ourselves?

It’s not one big breakthrough.

It’s the thousands of micro-decisions we make each day that add up to the results we have.

The Power of Micro-Decisions

Many years ago I read the book The Slight Edge by Jeff Olsen for the first time. It helped me see that there are no neutral choices in life. That every decision we make takes us closer to or further away from what it is we want.

The book was so impactful that I even have a tattoo that represents it.

I think using health and fitness is always a good, relatable example for most everyone and everything.

Let’s think about choices in this context…

You eat an entire pizza and drink a liter of soda today.

Does it really impact your life other than that you’ll probably feel awful for 24 hours? Nope!

But if you did it every day, your health would spiral downward quickly.

The micro choices are so impactful because they’re almost invisible but they add up over time pretty fast.

They also seem so insignificant in the moment that it’s easy to overlook their impact.

You take the walk and lift some weights today…or not.

You choose the water over the sugary drink.

You eat the protein rather than the bagel.

You go to bed earlier and get more sleep.

What Actually Creates Results

It’s easy to write off a day, and then a week…

Before you know it, months or even years go by with more of the micro-decisions being those that take you further from what you actually want. This is the cycle for most people, at least in one or more areas of life.

The point of this article is to create awareness around the power of the micro-decisions, knowing that they make far more impact than the big events.

So, if you’re waiting for the moment that changes everything, this is your reminder that it’s probably not coming.

What is coming is another ordinary day filled with small, micro choices.

Those choices won’t feel dramatic, look impressive, or give you an instant hit of motivation.

But they will compound.

And over time, they will either build the life you say you want or slowly take you further away from it.

The real question isn’t whether you’ll have a breakthrough.

It’s whether you’ll commit to the micro-decisions that actually create one.

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these ideas more deeply through conversation and storytelling, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re committed to growth, awareness, and creating meaningful change one decision at a time, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With clarity and intention,
Nicole

I finished 2024 with nothing but wide open space. On November 30th of that year, I completed the transition from the sale of my last business, and my only goal at that time was to have no goals.

I wanted the time to choose to do anything at any time.

I wanted no pressure to do, create, perform, or show up.

I wanted nothing on my schedule. No meetings. No zoom. No obligation.

I thought I’d dive into reading, learning, and expanding.

I thought I’d be deep in a mediation practice, wanting to write thoughtfully, document my life more, and craft my version of peace.

What Actually Happened

But here’s what happened…

I needed a few months to just “be.”

I went silent online compared to how I’d previously shown up.

I didn’t ramp up my reading the way I’d intended. I meditated randomly and not that much.

I’d reached what I now refer to as a “saturation point” during my years in business. I’d read so many books, gotten so much coaching, learned so many new things that it literally left my brain feeling saturated.

So, when I’d try to read or learn new information, my eyes or ears would see or hear what was happening, but I was really unable to absorb any of it.

Sometimes it felt like someone was speaking a foreign language to me when they were definitely speaking English.

The Reality of Recovery

I had also created daily content on social media and multiple emails per week for years, plus hundreds of hours of content each year for marketing and for training my clients and hundreds more on live coaching calls.

The idea that I’d be excited to document and create as I entered my sabbatical was a bit asinine looking back. 😂

Rest was the only thing required.

For a while I’d publish a post every few weeks or maybe once a month when I really felt like I had something to say.

Looking back, I was sharing the private moments of my personal journey like a public journal knowing that what I was experiencing others were too and that it could be helpful for them.

From Stepping Away to the Return

I took 3 international multi-week trips last year without my computer. In fact, the first 9 months of the year I barely even opened my laptop.

When I hired my editor and producer to launch Spirituality for Skeptics before I went to Italy in September, I knew I was going to hit the ground running when I got back in October - and I honestly wasn’t sure if I’d be ready for it.

Was I ready to create and share consistently again?

Was I ready to have calls on my schedule?

Would I put the same pressure on myself like I had before?

What Re-Engaging Gave Me

Well, it turns out I made the right move at the right time because I’m LOVING the show I’ve created! It’s given me the rapid personal growth I’ve always wanted faster than anything else ever has.

And I’ve truly accelerated my ability to see in real time old habits, patterns, and stories playing out in my ways of doing that I can resolve immediately. It’s actually such a cool gift, and I feel like I’m transforming faster than I thought possible!

The Challenge of “Just Being”

But let me tell you…just “being” is no easy task as a high achiever.

It sounds like this peaceful, blissful state.

You’d think it would be when you have all the time in the world, but it doesn’t change the patterns you develop of a racing mind, the need for anxiety-soothing activities, and the physiological pressure that became cemented out of what felt like necessity for many years.

Even though my days didn’t look like I thought they would for nearly a year of sabbatical, slowly and over time, I settled into my new reality.

One where showing up every day was no longer required.

One where it was safe to just be.

One where there were no expectations from others (and far less from myself).

What Slowing Down Actually Gave Me

And in that quiet safety, my creativity came back to life.

I used to believe that if I wasn’t actively building something, I was wasting time.

Now I see that there are seasons where nothing needs to be produced for something important to be formed.

If you’re in a season where things look quieter than you expected, where rest feels awkward, creativity feels slow, or your old pace no longer fits…maybe nothing has gone wrong after all.

Maybe this is the part where something new is quietly organizing itself, and you just have to be patient and let it unfold. 🤍

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these themes more deeply, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re navigating your own season of slowing down, letting go, or learning how to just be, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading and reflecting alongside me.

With love and curiosity,
Nicole

For years in my last business, I ran Vision Planning Workshops each year between Christmas & New Years. I followed the process I taught myself, and I always loved the clarity that came from it.

I intentionally did no planning for 2025, as it was a necessary year of downtime after selling and exiting my company.

Slowly through the year, my creativity came back online. I was reading more. Writing here and there. And in the last quarter of the year, things really sparked with the launch of Spirituality for Skeptics.

I love this show, the process of creating it, and the people I’m connecting with because of it. I want to do it forever.

Outside of that, I’m not really sure…

Why 2026 Vision Planning Felt Hard

So, I struggled with my vision planning for 2026, and here’s why:

In many aspects, I want more of the same…

The calm, slow mornings

The wide open space during the daytime so I can hike as much as I want and hit the gym at off-peak hours

A life full of choice & spaciousness

I love waking up each day and being able to ask myself: what do I want to do today?

But then there’s the other part of me…

The part of me craving more structure and direction. It’s the ambitious part of me that loves achieving and seeing my creations have an impact in the world.

It feels like I’ve been teetering in the in-between forever, even though it’s only been 13 months.

The desire to know what’s next, to have goals, and to feel momentum pull at me hard.

But equally, I want nothing on my agenda at all!

Being human is so complicated, right!?

The Question I Kept Coming Back To

This has really led me to the question: “how do we navigate goal and intention setting when we’re not even clear on what we want?”

In case you’re struggling with that clarity as well, I wanted to share with you what I came up with if it’ll help you in your 2026 vision plan.

What I Actually Did Instead

1. I wrote down the things I’m most proud of from 2025.

2. I clearly defined how I want to feel day to day in 2026.

3. I decided on what I want to improve in the upcoming year.

4. I wrote what I have already created for myself that I want to protect (my spacious schedule, for example).

5. Then I wrote out the tangible goals I could clearly define related to Spirituality for Skeptics.

6. Finally, I listed out the energetic intentions I want to embody for 2026.

It’s probably the simplest vision planning I’ve ever done, and it kinda feels incomplete compared to how I always did it.

Before, there were tons of goals, all of the reverse engineering, numbers, math, strategy…

But you know, those things don’t have a place in my life right now, and that’s ok with me…I think - haha!

Letting Go of Old Conditioning

I used to have a background on my phone years ago that said “If you’re not moving ahead, you’re falling behind.” And I believed it. Not only did I believe it, but I had a very fast pace for what that actually meant. No wonder I was constantly stressed!

It’s funny - I shared this background with a mentor of mine and she asked me - “how’s that working for you?” I removed it immediately.

So it seems this season is a bit of a test - can I cease my old ways of operating that kept me in stress and anxiety?

Maybe it’s about trusting that the clarity will come because I’ve created the space for it to arrive.

For now, I’m letting “how I want to feel” lead more than what I want to build. I’m protecting the life I’ve already created while staying open to what wants to emerge next.

That feels like enough for this moment.

And if you’re also staring at a blank vision plan wondering why nothing concrete is landing yet, maybe it’s an invitation to slow down, listen, and let the next chapter reveal itself in its own time.

🎧 Explore Spirituality for Skeptics

If this reflection resonates and you want to explore these themes more deeply, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If you’re navigating your own in-between season, I’m really glad you’re here.

Thank you for reading, reflecting, and walking this uncertain but meaningful path alongside me.

With love and curiosity,
Nicole

I’ve had an article pulled up on my phone by Dr. Ashley Butterfield on Understanding the Cycle of Anxiety since before I exited the company I sold — so for more than a year.

It was something I’d intended to share with my students conceptually and through my own unique experience and lens.

In the article, she defines the anxiety cycle in four steps:

• You have anxiety

• You avoid the thing causing the anxiety

• You achieve short-term relief from the anxiety

• Long-term, your anxiety continues to grow

I think this is accurate for some people and definitely something I saw extremely often in my business coaching students.

When Anxiety Doesn’t Lead to Avoidance

For me, step two was different. Rather than avoidance, step two was going into massive action that was unrelenting until the problem I perceived was resolved.

This pattern taught me something that’s both good and bad - my focus and action create results, and my peace and emotional wellbeing were the price of those results.

This pattern worked for me until it didn’t. It’s a pattern I’m highly conscious of and committed to NOT bringing into my next chapter in life.

Control vs. Experience

One lesson I’ve received from spirit repeatedly is that we have less control over outcomes than we think, but we do have control over our experience.

And that’s the point.

That’s where the growth happens - in the moment-to-moment of every experience, in what we choose to make everything mean, and in how we respond.

It can feel confusing to have such high levels of anxiety when you’re focused, productive, and getting results. For me, the anxiety was, in my mind and probably also my subconscious, the driver of my motivation and therefore my results.

You might resonate with this if you consider yourself type A, a high achiever, and often find yourself being praised for your results and work ethic.

Anxiety as a Strategy

Here’s the thing though…anxiety became my nervous system’s default setting.

It was uncomfortable, but I coped hard with it and thought that meant I was strong. Maybe that is what it meant - I still don’t know. But anxiety as a strategy has a finite amount of time before it expires.

Productivity masked the emotional discomfort and dysregulation. My success reinforced the pattern. Being so busy all the time put me on autopilot and helped me avoid changing my thoughts and behaviors.

People like you and me put so much energy into managing results that we often forget to pay attention to how it all feels.

And that’s what crisis hits for many: burnout, business collapse, relationships dissolving.

I feel like it’s spirit’s way of getting our attention when nothing else seems to.

Unlearning the Pattern

I love the anxiety I had now that it’s faded (honestly, it’s not completely gone, though). It served me during that phase in life, and it even served me well.

But now I’m unlearning it.

I’m sitting with discomfort rather than defaulting to action.

I’m constantly reminding myself of my own safety and all that I’ve already achieved. At the end of the day, anxiety is all about safety - at least for me.

The temptation to return to old patterns comes on strong, but as the months go by with my new awareness, it’s gotten so much easier for me to see it all as it’s playing out rather than relying on hindsight once the damage is already done.

Anxiety as a Teacher

Anxiety is a teacher. Like all emotions, it’s data meant to help steer us where we need to go. How we pay attention to it and how we respond to it determines how we feel and experience everyday life and our work.

I’m curious…how do you respond to anxiety? Does it motivate you like it did me, or does it cause avoidance like the article shared?

Have you ever considered the long-term costs?

I’d love for you to share below.

🎧 Listen & Connect

If these reflections resonate with you, you might enjoy Spirituality for Skeptics, where I explore themes like identity, surrender, and growth through honest conversations and real stories.

📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

Thank you for sharing this space with me and for being willing to look at your inner patterns with honesty and curiosity. ❤️

With love,
Nicole

Lately SURRENDER has been calling to me. Well, screaming at me, actually.

Surrendering is a nice idea, isn’t it?

Allegedly, it takes the pressure off.

Before I even get into what I want to say, the caveat is always that we have to do the work to meet surrender in the middle.

Sitting back and letting life carry you wherever it wants certainly doesn’t get you where you want to be or where you’re meant to be.

That said, I thought when I got to the part where I could just surrender after having done the work, that it would be so much easier.

But I’m not the type to sit back.

I like being in action.
I like feeling in control.
I like feeling like I’m creating my results.

But in this in-between stage in life, I’m being asked to sit longer than is comfortable.

I can’t even say how proud of the work I have already done in Spirituality for Skeptics! (Omg do we have some amazingggg episodes coming up)

But I know there is more.

I’m starting to get glimpses, but I’m far from feeling like I have the full picture.

The Teachings of Surrender

I love the idea of surrender so much that I’ve read the amazing works of Michael Singer, The Untethered Soul & The Surrender Experiment, multiple times each.

In these books he shares the hypothesis that our suffering is caused by our internal resistance to life as it unfolds.

That we can find freedom and fulfillment when we let go of our thoughts + our self-created identity.

He shares the idea that if we can remove our ego from perception & decision making,
that everything will go better, and FEEL better, and work out in our favor.

He suggests that life, or universal intelligence, is much smarter than our minds.

And then I start to feel a bit dense.

Because as much as I intellectually understand what he is saying, and believe it to be true, putting this work into practice has NOT come easily to me.

The Hard Part No One Warns You About

Months ago, I received the message that I needed to rest.

And when I felt ready to go, that I would need to continue resting more.

I didn’t know it would be this hard.

I feel so ready to know the full vision of my future pathway. (But interestingly, perhaps not as ready to find myself super busy again.)

Again, logically, I know that I trust it will unfold exactly as it’s supposed to, in the timing it’s meant to be (because it always has!).

But as Tom Petty said, “the waiting is the hardest part.”

Restlessness and Trust

I hate feeling idle, not productive, or like life isn’t moving forward.

(Even though again, I logically know this isn’t what’s happening.)

But what I do know from my spiritual studies and conversations is that there is so much happening for reasons we can’t explain or understand.

My mentor Romy keeps reminding me to enjoy this downtime, because I’ll wish I had it when I get busy again.

When the restlessness hits, I’m trying to zoom out and trust that I will understand everything with hindsight.

I Just Keep Hearing…

Trust and surrender.
Trust and surrender.
Trust and surrender.

It’s hard to do, but I’m listening.

Have you had a similar experience?

🎧 Listen & Connect

If these reflections resonate, you might enjoy Spirituality for Skeptics, where I explore themes like surrender, trust, identity, and the in-between through honest conversations and real stories.

📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

You can listen on YouTube or any podcast platform, or subscribe to have new episodes sent directly to you.

✨ Stay Connected

If this writing resonates, I’d love for you to subscribe here on Substack so these reflections can land directly in your inbox as they unfold.

Thank you for being here in this in-between space with me.

With love and curiosity,
Nicole

Since getting on Substack in November, I’ve produced a handful of articles, but I’ve also faced something that I’ve never faced in my nearly 30 years of writing - writer’s block.

I’m not willing to let AI write for me and outsource my voice in that way. There’s nothing wrong with it overall, but my brand has always been about authenticity, and in a world that’s heavily relying on AI for content, I do not want to create more of the same.

(Literally as I type this in a google doc each time I space down to a new paragraph it gives me the AI prompt “help me write”)

Where the Block Is Coming From

Here’s where I think the writer’s block comes from…

It’s this in-between identities phase I’ve been sitting in for a year now.

I’m no longer the expert business coach wildly confident in the frameworks and strategy I taught. That part of me still very much exists, but it’s just not the work I’m doing.

I came into Spirituality for Skeptics and my new pathway very much stating that I’m not the guru or the expert. That I’m here to learn and facilitate conversations alongside you.

Which I suppose leads me to feel like I don’t have a whole lot to teach or share aside from what I’m personally experiencing.

And as someone who worked as an “expert” for so long, I wonder…is sharing my personal lessons on navigating the liminal space enough? Does it truly create value for people?

I honestly don’t know.

Letting Go of the Expert Identity

I was so, so good at helping people make money as coaches. I always shared personal stories while doing this, but it always led to that specific desired outcome for others.

What if all my work can do at this very moment is give guidance, affirmation, or just validation?

It just doesn’t seem like enough - for me, anyway.

But what I do know is that I’m learning and growing by the minute. I believe with everything I’ve got that Spirituality for Skeptics is a high-quality, well-rounded, wildly insightful show that is bringing value to the world. It feels like purpose work in the way nothing else ever has. It feels like my contribution to humanity (though I know there is even more than this coming even if I don’t know what it is).

Being New Again

Substack is also a slow starter. It’s not a wildly popular platform yet like other social media, and honestly, it won’t be for those who just like short form content - which is kinda why I like it!

So for those of us starting here, we’ve gotta be ok with a few views here and 2 likes there.

As someone who ran a multi-million dollar online business previously, it gives me (and perhaps you) the opportunity to sort through old stories and belief systems about how things are supposed to go and what success “should” look like.

Maybe it’s about rebuilding ourselves and everything about how we operate through the in-between space so that what we don’t need doesn’t follow us into the next phase.

It’s speculation, but it feels true to me.

Finding My Voice in Real Time

The truth is, my voice in this new space isn’t clear yet. My spiritual identity isn’t anchored in. I’ve got a story that I’m such a beginner on this journey that I can facilitate great conversations but not yet teach (although something is waking up in me telling me I’m much further along than I give myself credit for).

Even as I’m writing this, more ideas are flowing - amazing what happens when you just put your fingers on the keyboard!

A lot of what I’ve been sharing here and even on my social media as I’ve been transitioning from my old life into the new is internal processing that I’ve chosen to make public in the hopes of helping others.

Remembering What Matters

Just like I used to coach others in business that every piece of content they create matters no matter the vanity metrics, I am remembering that everything I do is building this new body of work.

And this feels like legacy work.

I think we all tend to downplay or underestimate the value of our own experiences and the things we share.

I’m going to try to remember to write for the sake of writing, reflection, and trusting it’ll reach the people who need to hear the message.

I’m also very much learning - and I hope you can embrace this too - that when it comes to content you post online, timelines aren’t linear in terms of the way people are reached or the way they engage.

For Anyone in the In-Between

If you’re feeling the in-between space like me, keep going.

Because it’s through this process that we find the foundation of our new voice that we can then amplify.

Big impact doesn’t come without shedding old identities and integrating new belief systems.

This is THE work we are here to do as humans, and I’m here for it.

If you feel resonant with this journey, please let me know!

🎧 Listen & Connect

If you’re curious to explore these conversations more deeply, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If this writing resonates, I’d love for you to subscribe here on Substack so these reflections and conversations can land directly in your inbox as they unfold.

Thank you for being here in this in-between space with me.

With love and curiosity,
Nicole

I’ve had to work through quite a lot of mindset reframing, and I can already see the lessons coming through clearly.

I mentioned in a previous article that it’s quite strange to be starting over considering the heights of success I reached in my previous businesses.

And to be honest, part of me knew this was an entirely new venture and another part of me thought it would be more like just taking the next step forward in my professional path.

Both are somewhat true.

I’m not starting with zero audience or credibility. But I am starting in a completely different area of life (spirituality vs. business), which is a completely different audience and area of interest from who I previously served. There’s some overlap of course, but it is still a massive leap.

I am so grateful for the ones who want to stay in this part of my world, but I certainly don’t expect it.

There are some who made their dislike of my angle on spiritual conversations very clear because it goes against their views, and that’s ok. To be honest, I was expecting even more of this than I’ve received (and I’m thankful for not having more!).

Some of the lessons I’m learning so far in this part of my journey are around patience, trust, surrender, increasing personal strength/thickening skin…

These are deeply spiritual lessons, and it only makes sense that they surface in this venture around spiritual growth and curiosity!

A Breakthrough

Here’s a big breakthrough I had while writing this piece:

I’m learning that mastery in one identity doesn’t transfer to the next, and the spiritual curriculum of “starting again” is exactly the point.

That’s the heartbeat. The why.

Not the podcast.
Not the audience shift.
Not the critics.

It’s ego death + beginnerhood + spiritual humility + identity shedding.

These are the lessons of the past month that I want to dive into, and I share them with you because I hope they’re helpful for you if you are shifting or ever shift directions in any area of life (business, relationships, belief systems, literally anything).

The 3 Stages of Shifting

1. Identity Unraveling

What it means to no longer be who everyone knew me as…

• I expected to bring my success with me

• Spirit asked me to leave the identity at the door

• The audience shift mirrors the ego shift I am wrestling with (and attempting to surrender to)

• Acknowledging that being humbled is an initiation, not punishment

This part is so necessary and so incredibly uncomfortable.

2. Spiritual Lessons of Beginner Energy

These are lessons I’ve confronted before and ones I need to re-learn or deepen in this stage of my evolution:

• Patience: accepting progress without speed or picking up where I left off

• Surrender: no control over who stays/leaves my world

• Trust: creating without certainty of the outcome

• Thick skin: when people dislike the angle

• Softness: gratitude for those who stay energetically aligned & engaged

It never ceases to amaze me how many layers of each lesson exist.

3. The Myth of Linear Success

I thought Spirituality for Skeptics was just the next step in my career, but it turned out to be a reincarnation of me in this lifetime.

Here’s the tight timeline of how this has progressed for me since the launch:

• My Old world: predictable success, known identity, mastery

• My Threshold: selling my business, taking nearly a year of downtime, shifting topics

• My New world: disorientation, beginnerness, vulnerability, passion, purpose, commitment

• My Integration: accepting non-linearity as spiritual curriculum & loving the lessons within this, including all the discomfort they bring

Wow - that’s a LOT.

Here’s the thing: I don’t know how this new world I’m creating will unfold, but I’m trusting that what I’m choosing and experiencing now will be exactly what I need to get me to where I’m going.

I’m re-learning to create for the sake of creation and contribution, not to generate sales.

I’m learning to let go of people-pleasing at an even deeper level. I’m releasing those who want to unsubscribe from my world for any reason with the direction I’m heading in because I’m becoming a new version of myself that’s not for everyone. And that’s ok.

I’m shedding an identity for the sake of allowing my purpose to more fully flourish, and that’s a beautiful thing for me. I choose to love it when it feels unstable + uncertain yet guided.

Writing this piece has made me look back on the past 50 days or so since Spirituality for Skeptics first really started coming together and appreciate the journey at a whole new level.

I haven’t been able to put into words how different I feel and how much has changed for me since starting this project, but upon this reflection, it’s all so obvious why I would feel so incredibly different.

Can you relate to any of these stages of the journey?

The death and reincarnation?

The need to deepen and re-learn spiritual lessons you thought you might’ve mastered?

Please do let me know. And let me know if pieces like this are helpful for you. I love learning through the stories and lessons of others, and I will absolutely write more like this if it helps you in any way 🙂

As always, thank you for sharing this tiny space on the internet with me. ❤️

🎧 Continue Your Own Transformation

If you haven’t yet listened, you can find Spirituality for Skeptics on YouTube or any podcast platform.

Be sure to subscribe to have new episodes sent directly to you!

With love,
Nicole

It’s amazing what can happen when you back your desire with belief and action,

As you may know, I launched my new YouTube show and podcast Spirituality for Skeptics just a few weeks ago on November 11, 2025.

The idea for the show had been on my heart and mind since the beginning of the year.

December 1, 2024 is when I fully completed the transition out of the coaching business that I sold. That transition lasted 15 months and prior to that, I ran that business for six years as the sole owner.

🌿 The Cost of Success

Building a multimillion dollar coaching business that allowed me to work from anywhere in the world was absolutely a dream come true. I am grateful for what I created and everyone involved every single day.

But success always comes with a cost as well. I was stressed more than I like to admit and equally put so much pressure on myself to show up and be everything I could to everyone that it resulted in burnout, which I saw coming.

However, I had to keep going. It was what was required at the time, and there was so much of it that I loved.

🛏 A Season of Rest & Recovery

Once I stepped away completely, a year ago yesterday from the day that I am writing this, I knew that I was entering a massive rest and recovery season… One that I’m really still in.

My mentor, Romy Wyser, who has supported me through so many seasons of life and business emphasized over and over again how important the rest is. I received guidance in my own spiritual seeking to rest, even when I feel rested enough. So I guess to a large extent, I’m still in that resting space, despite having launched my show.

As someone who is a high performer and is extremely internally motivated, this can be really challenging. Even though I don’t want a bunch of stuff in my calendar or a lot of obligations, the driven part of me misses feeling important in the way that structure provided me with.

⚡️ The Shift That Happens When You Commit

Circling back… As I said, it’s incredible what can shift when you back your desire with action. When you put your money where your mouth is. I used to tell my coaching students this all the time! And here I am experiencing it again myself.

I only really committed to bringing Spirituality for Skeptics into reality in September with a launch date about 8 weeks later. Once I found my editor and producer, things moved fast!

Since then, I’ve recorded enough episodes to get us through the winter with many more conversations in the works, my brand new YouTube channel has hit over 11k views (3 weeks since the launch episodes), and I’ve started to develop connections with the most amazing people that I would’ve never encountered had I not said yes to this venture.

I honestly feel like I have grown and had more shifts personally in the last 2 1/2 months than previously combined years. And I know it’s because I invested… Both monetarily and energetically to communicate to the universe that I am all in.

Interestingly, Romy’s reading around the show and its outcomes shifted dramatically once I made the investment and commitment. Even those decisions energetically put things in motion. It’s something I’ve known and taught forever, but I’m always in awe of when I experience it for myself.

🌱 A Challenge for You

So, my challenge to you today would be: if there is anything that you have been dreaming of that has been sitting on your heart to bring into reality, do what you can today to infuse life into it.

Make the investment.
Put the word out there.
Create the new Instagram account.
Whatever feels doable for you.

And then do the next thing and the next thing, and before you know it, it comes to life…and it can all happen so much faster than what you imagine.

I am still stunned by how quickly Spirituality for Skeptics has come together and how it’s turned out even better than I could’ve imagined.

Have you ever had an experience like that? One where you made a decision that you backed with action and everything changed rapidly? I’d love for you to share!

🎧 Listen & Connect

You can find Spirituality for Skeptics everywhere and join the community here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics?si=kYL0AiUI-e9uBkgI
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If this message resonates with you, subscribe below to get new reflections and podcast episodes delivered right to your inbox.

Together, we’ll keep exploring what it means to live, create, trust, and grow…with curiosity, devotion, and an open heart.

With gratitude,
Nicole

It’s so interesting how things always come back around - from clothing that’s in style to how we show up on the internet - apparently.

I started blogging for the first time in 2011… a time before information was readily available everywhere.

It was a time when people still had to search for what they wanted to learn rather than an algorithm placing it directly in front of them in a newsfeed.

Just 15 short years ago, people sought blogs to read & learn more than just entertainment online (at least I did and that’s my perception).

📉 The Attention Economy

This might sound negative, and maybe it is, but the attention economy is something I’ve already been exhausted by for a long time. But as someone who’s worked solely online for over 10 years, it’s not something I can escape.

So I suppose I’m at a moment where I’m trying to find my place in it all as someone who has no desire to compete for attention online. 🤪

✍️ Returning to My First Love: Writing

When I was 15 I understood for the first time that I loved writing and that I was good at it. Since then, it’s been my favorite method of communication, self-expression, and also business growth.

In fact, I even sold my writing in my last company for other coaches to use as their own!

Like many people who build online businesses, I found myself needing to focus the majority of my time on client delivery, marketing and sales, and strategy. Fortunately, I had the chance to write a LOT. Email marketing and social media content were my biggest drivers of success in my coaching company (and back in the day in my fitness studio too!).

But before the past 12 months, it’s been a really long time since I wrote for me.

Whenever I write, it’s to share, connect, and hopefully help someone else.

However, writing for the sake of marketing or in support of a business is just, by nature, completely different from what I’m doing here on Substack and what I did with my first blog back in 2011.

🤫 A Season of Quiet

Most of the past 12 months, I have been quiet. It’s only been in the quick runway leading up to the launch of Spirituality for Skeptics that I’ve been sharing consistently on social media again.

One thing that happened for me as a result of carrying a lot during the time I ran my company all the way through the time that I transitioned out is that I was so focused on its success that my creative flame dwindled.

I think this is completely normal, but in all of the rest and quiet season I’ve had in 2025, I feel the creativity roaring back.

I have ups and downs with it for sure. But I’m writing again. I’m creating on social media (and it feels GOOD and not like a task I have to complete). I’m also reading and learning more than I have since the much earlier days of my entrepreneurial journey.

🔥 Staying True to Myself

One of the things I’m committed to is staying true and authentic to myself over playing games of algorithms and reach.

And this is a tough one because I deeply desire for Spirituality for Skeptics to reach many thousands of people. I’m all for strategy and leaning into what works, but I know above all else, I’ve got to do it in a way that’s most aligned to me. I’ve got to do it in ways that keep my creative spark alive and create consistent moments of excitement and joy.

I’m a high-achiever by nature, and I’ve already wrestled with this, but now I’m committed to doing this in a way that acknowledges the fact that there really needs to be no pressure for me around this show.

My desire for its reach comes from the impact I want it to have. But I have to let the show do its thing. I have to trust I’ve done and am doing the work and that it’s going to land exactly where it’s supposed to. I think this lesson of trust and surrender around the show is one of the most important lessons I’m in the process of learning.

🌱 Moving Into a New Phase

I do know for sure I’m meant to approach this show and this phase in my life much differently than I have in the past. Change is hard, but I’m here for it. 🙂

🎧 Listen & Connect

You can find Spirituality for Skeptics everywhere and join the community here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics?si=kYL0AiUI-e9uBkgI
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If this message resonates with you, subscribe below to get new reflections and podcast episodes delivered right to your inbox.

Together, we’ll keep exploring what it means to live, express, create, and grow…with curiosity and without pressure.

With gratitude,
Nicole

Something unexplainable happened to me a few years ago that I’m still trying to make sense of.

You may or may not know this, but I sold a company that I built to 8-figures.

As I moved into the process of finding partners and eventually transitioning out of the company entirely, it didn’t really make sense.

I was generating multiple 6-figures every month. I had a great team. We were doing great work in the world.

As a former high school English teacher whose salary started at $29,500/year, my business was generating roughly a decade’s worth of teaching income or more… every single month. For years.

At the Height of Success

I was at the height of success in my company, consistently hitting new peaks. I was carrying a lot of stress but certainly working fewer hours than in the earlier days.

So, what called me to make this huge change when I was at the top of my game, earning more money than I’d ever dreamed of?

Stress reduction and a change of lifestyle were certainly part of it.

But honestly…I still don’t know why I made the decision when and how I did.

All I know is that the pull was very strong. That I was divinely guided to make the moves I made, with the people I made them with, in the exact time that it all happened.

I cannot explain it.

Doubt and Divine Guidance

There were so many moments of doubt through the process. There were tears of sadness and frustration.

There were days when the deposits were hitting my bank account that I questioned my own sanity. Like… who would walk away from what I’d built with all of my heart, soul, and dedication?!

Looking back, I so clearly see how it all played out just as it was intended. But I still don’t quite grasp how I knew these things.

All I can say is that it was divine guidance. Maybe I’ll understand more about the why and the how and the timing when I have a clearer picture of where my life is headed when my purpose who completely wrapped up in my business for much of my life.

A New Chapter

I do know that clearing this part of my life enabled me to focus more on my spiritual development.

I had the bandwidth to create Spirituality for Skeptics and the cash to hire an INCREDIBLE team to help me get this off the ground the right way. I’m so beyond thankful.

Even after recording the first few months’ worth of episodes (dropping one weekly!), I know this is something I could do forever.

I have big goals for the show, though I’m trying to detach from the outcome.

I’m trying to trust that what’s meant to be will happen because I’m showing up and doing my part. I just keep repeating to myself: “Surrender to the result.”

Letting Go of Control

My boyfriend Jade keeps reminding me that no matter what happens, this show is me putting my purpose and work into the world - and that’s valuable.

He also reminds me that no matter what, this is a step in getting to where I’m supposed to go.

As someone who has been tied to goals and targets and strategy for so long, who very much controlled the outcomes in my previous businesses, this is really challenging for me.

It’s especially challenging because this show and its success follow a totally different pathway than my other businesses…one that requires much wider reach to have the impact I want it to have.

Redefining Success

I wrote before about how weird it is to be starting over after so many years of sustained success.

So, I have to remind myself that my success is still here. Just because I chose to change directions, it doesn’t negate all that I’ve already accomplished.

But wow! Sometimes that’s hard to remember!

One thing I can say is that the conversations I’m having on Spirituality for Skeptics have been so helpful in both my growth and helping me see the bigger picture of what life and our soul’s journeys are all about.

Trusting the Unknown

While I still cannot define or explain why I chose to walk away at the height of my success, I do know that it was so divinely guided.

That alone comforts me and helps me trust this wide-open path that lies ahead.

Have you made huge, powerful decisions like this that you know were divinely guided but can’t quite explain? I’d love for you to share your experience in the comments!

🎧 Listen & Connect

You can find Spirituality for Skeptics everywhere you get your podcasts — and join the community here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics?si=kYL0AiUI-e9uBkgI
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If this message resonates with you, subscribe below to get new reflections and podcast episodes delivered right to your inbox.

Together, we’ll keep exploring what it means to live, question, and grow with curiosity, humility, and without dogma.

With gratitude,
Nicole

The people who should be questioning themselves the most are the ones who are 100% certain that their belief system in any area of life is right.

Whether religion, politics… All the big trigger areas…

What we have to remember is that there are people like this on every side of the debate.

Seeing Both Sides

Using politics for example, there are certainly (and more likely) a lot of people who are somewhere in the middle when it comes to what they’d ideally like to see politically.

Where there are Republicans who think the Democrats have every issue wrong, there are also Democrats who feel the exact same way about Republicans.

That alone should clue people in that they are basing everything on feeling and not fact.

If people on the other side have the same amount of conviction that you have about what’s right and wrong and it opposes your belief system, that’s all it is - your personal belief.

Outside of universal truths like the sky being blue, pretty much everything is opinion, interpretation, feeling, and it all comes through a highly filtered lens that is individual to each person.

If what you believe couldn’t be proven in a court of law beyond a reasonable doubt, it’s feeling and opinion, not fact. Your opinions are not factually right and their opposing beliefs are not inherently wrong. Or vice versa.

It’s true! Our feelings and opinions are not facts, no matter how much we think they are.

Rigid belief systems keep us stuck. Closed mindedness alienates others.

The Power of Open-Minded Thinking

I’m not saying you have to swing to the other side and abandon whatever values are important to you, but flexible, open minded thinking is the only real path to growth.

This is especially true when it comes to our spirituality.

Science has proven many things in this realm, but the truth of the matter is that no one knows what happens after we die. No one.

However, I certainly have my own beliefs as you do yours!

Why I Started Spirituality for Skeptics

I decided to start Spirituality for Skeptics because I want to continue learning. My mind is open to all possibilities.

As humans, we want certainty and to be able to make sense out of things. We want to know where we are going and why and what it all means.

I have ideas and beliefs just like you. I hope what I believe is true! But I do not have 100% conviction in those beliefs because there is truly no way of knowing.

I don’t care if someone has been raised their entire life with a certain belief system or framework. There is no way of knowing. That is the only fact.

On Judgment and Certainty

And if someone’s beliefs cause you to judge them (note: judging someone’s behavior is very different from judging their beliefs), it’s even more of a reason for close self-examination.

Self-righteousness or certainty should not accompany spiritual or political beliefs, no matter what they are.

All of this to say, I am also human, and it’s also my work to do, as these tendencies are ingrained in all of us.

Learning to Love Uncertainty

Being uncertain in what’s true spiritually is truly the only thing we can be certain about.

We all have beliefs, but staying open-minded & curious, I believe, is the only way to learn the lessons we need to learn and get closer to the truth we all seek. And of course, the ultimate truth will only be revealed to us at the time we cross over.

I’ve kind of learned to love the uncertainty, as it’s a pathway to explore possibilities. How about you?

🎧 Listen & Connect

You can find Spirituality for Skeptics everywhere you get your podcasts & and join the community here:

📺 YouTube: https://youtube.com/@spirituality.for.skeptics?si=kYL0AiUI-e9uBkgI
📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/spirituality.for.skeptics
🎥 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@spirituality.forskeptics

✨ Stay Connected

If this message resonates with you, subscribe below to get new reflections and bonus content delivered right to your inbox.

Together, we’ll keep exploring what it means to live, question, and grow…with curiosity, humility, and without dogma.

With gratitude,
Nicole