In Episode 5, I’m IN THE ROOM with and Laura Thompson, the co-founders of Three Ships Beauty, for an intimate conversation and a little matcha making inside Connie’s beautiful home.

In 2017 I was building my first business hosting community events in Toronto. Around that same time, Connie and Laura were starting to build Three Ships Beauty (then known as Niu Body!).

We were introduced when they started sampling their products at events I was hosting, and what began as a collaboration quickly turned into a friendship. Over the years, I’d visit their pop-ups, model for photoshoots, host events with them, partner on giveaways, and have the privilege of watching their dream grow into a multi-million-dollar company and one of Canada’s leading skincare brands.

Connie and Laura are literally two of the hardest-working people I know. They lead with integrity, care deeply about what they create, and I’m so proud to call them my friends.

That’s why filming this episode of In The Room felt so special.

Yes, we talk about entrepreneurship — what it was like for them to appear on Dragon’s Den (the Shark Tank of Canada), make it onto the Forbes 30 Under 30, and what it takes to build a successful company.

But we also talk about their desire to become moms while building a business (and all the thoughts that come with that!), plus Laura’s brain tumour diagnosis, the support of their husbands and their views on friendship, health and purpose. We even took time make matcha together (Connie was trying to get me on the matcha train…you’ll have to watch to see if it worked…as you can see I’m skeptical!).

One of my favourite parts of hosting In The Room is creating space for conversations that move beyond someone’s résumé. Because behind every successful business no matter how big or small are real people navigating work, relationships, health, and life—just like the rest of us. So tune in for the stuff you actually want to hear about!

🎙️ Watch Episode 5 of In The Room with Connie Lo and Laura Thompson on YouTube, Spotify or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

And if you liked the episode, please subscribe, comment, share it with friends…your support means the world to me!

I hope you’ll join me In The Room.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

When I first dreamt up the concept of this series, I knew I wanted two things to absolutely be a part of it: beautiful spaces and experiences with delicious food. Episode 4 of IN THE ROOM with Philip Lago and Mystique Mattai, the married couple behind the popular blog Chef Sous Chef and “Eat With Us” Cookbook is one that has both, and so much more!!!

I first connected with Mystique years ago because she started working at Indigo head office right after I left (I was a Marketing Manager there for four years)! Many people told us we shared similarities, and we both took that as a compliment. Ironically we also both started food blogs (mine was called Not Just Lettuce, reviewing vegetarian dishes at restaurants), and we both have books now sold at Indigo! It’s funny how life works out.

Mystique and Philip’s story is a beautiful one. Just three days after getting married in 2015, they turned their post-wedding blues and love of planning into something entirely unexpected: a food blog. What began as a creative outlet has since grown into Chef Sous Chef, a beloved online destination for home cooks, the “Eat With Us" cookbook, and contributions to Food Network Canada's Dining In and Menu Mashup.

Together, in this episode they share how they approach elevating everyday meals, why cooking at home can be just as special as dining out, and how slowing down to create beautiful experiences around food has shaped both their work and their family life.

They also reflect on becoming parents to 3 kids (all currently under the age of 5), traveling as a family, introducing their children to their cultural roots through food, and the importance of preserving traditions while creating new ones around the table.

It was a pleasure to spend the day in Mystique and Phil’s STUNNING kitchen and get a tour of their home. We made pizza from scratch (well, Phil did most of the work and I played second sous chef with Mystique)…and then over a delicious lunch we chatted about their love story, growing their family and what’s next for them.

This was a day where I was truly “in the room”, getting to share a piece of their everyday lives with them.

We chatted about partnership, home cooking, rituals, and finding joy in the ordinary. I highly recommend grabbing a glass of your favourite wine or a mocktail, a little cheese plate and sitting down to savour this episode.

🎙️ Watch Episode 4 of In The Room with Philip Lago and Mystique Mattai on YouTube, Spotify or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

And if you liked the episode, please subscribe, comment, share it with friends…your support means the world to me!

I hope you’ll join me In The Room.

In the next episode, I’m in the room with two founders behind a multi-million dollar skincare brand that started with just $4K and formulating products from their home kitchen. We make matcha (while they try and convince me to like it), and chat about how the past 8 years has looked like for them to get where they are today.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

I’m so excited to share Episode 3 with you! In this exclusive interview, join me IN THE ROOM with Dean Davidson, Founder and Creative Director of Dean Davidson Jewelry, alongside his partner Fernando Fontinelle. As a duo who rarely gives interviews, Dean and Fernando offer a rare behind-the-scenes look into the story, creativity, and partnership behind their jewelry brand.

I first met this pair at a beautiful dinner party hosted by mutual friends. I immediately loved everything about them — their impeccable style, their obsession with beautiful, timeless things, their appreciation for design (their home was just featured in House and Home magazine!), their love of travel and their desire to grow a business and life they love.

It’s been over 15 years since Dean started the brand, and it’s no surprise that it has evolved into one of Canada’s most recognized contemporary jewelry labels.

Dean’s designs have been worn by celebrities around the world and today the company remains headquartered in Toronto, where it operates its flagship boutique and design studio.

I had the pleasure of joining Dean & Fernando in the room at their studio, and it was such an honest, intimate conversation where they talked about not just the business, but their personal life, trips with friends and how they enjoy spending their weekends.

From its beginnings as a passion project to becoming a globally recognized brand worn by celebrities including Oprah Winfrey, Katy Perry and Jennifer Lopez, Dean Davidson Jewelry has built a reputation for bold, timeless designs and a loyal community of customers around the world. They’ve even been featured in Vogue and received a personal letter from THE Anna Wintour (we get into all of that in the episode!).

🎙️ Watch Episode 3 of In The Room with Dean Davidson & Fernando Fontinelle on YouTube, Spotify or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

And if you liked the episode, please subscribe, comment, share it with friends…your support means the world to me!

I hope you’ll join me In The Room.

In the next episode, I’m in the room with a married chef duo at their stunning home as we make pizza together so stay tuned.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

Looking for something to watch tonight? EPISODE 2 of IN THE ROOM with Andrea Christensen of Andrea’s Cookies is out now!!! So grab your cookie and take a seat. I’m honoured that this is the first interview she’s ever said yes to recording, and trust me it’s a good one! So watch the episode and keep reading for more of the story…

I first got to know Andrea when she started selling cookies out of her home during the pandemic. I sent her a DM to place a few (too many) orders and to ask if we could do a giveaway of her mini egg cookies, and it was my most popular giveaway EVER (not surprising…I mean who doesn’t love cookies)?!

Only five years later, Andrea has built one of Toronto’s most beloved brands. What began in her home kitchen has grown into four beautifully designed storefronts that feel more like cookie galleries than bakeries, with a community that eagerly waits to see what flavour she’ll dream up next.

Just take a look at this week’s line up.

When I started In The Room, I knew Andrea had to be part of the first season.

Not just because of the cookies, but because I wanted to understand more about the person behind the brand. So I joined her at her Ossington shop to talk about what it really looked like to turn a pandemic hobby into a business that people genuinely obsess over. We talked about creativity, taking risks, building a loyal community, getting the best collabs, and how she’s navigated becoming a founder while making time for a personal life including trips with her husband, regular girls nights and quality time with her adorable dog.

If you’ve ever wondered how to create a brand people become obsessed with, while remaining true to who you are in the process, this episode is for you.

Plus if you want to get a behind-the-scenes look of how those famous cookies are made, tune in because we cover that too!

🎙️ Watch Episode 2 of In The Room with Andrea’s Cookies on YouTube, Spotify or listen wherever you get your podcasts.

And if you liked the episode, please subscribe, comment, share it with friends…your support means the world to me!

I hope you’ll join me In The Room for this delicious hour.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

Wow, since I last wrote announcing the launch of my new show, there are 200 more of you lovely pen pals(!), which means thousands of us are connected together in this shared mission of living a fulfilling, present and memorable life. How incredible! Thank you for being here and reading these letters. I love connecting with you in this way and I appreciate every moment that you spend with me.

Today, I’m excited to share the first episode of In The Room with you along with a few moments behind the scenes. When I decided to go all in on filming this show, I knew that I wanted my first guest to be BIG. Someone that I admired, who has built something for themselves, lives expansively, has big dreams and an impactful story to share.

And boy, that’s exactly what I got.

For this first episode, I’m IN THE ROOM with , VC-backed CEO and co-owner of Create & Cultivate, the world’s LARGEST festival for women in business (think “Coachella for career women!). Past headliners include Kim Kardashian, Meghan Markle, Jessica Alba, and Ciara.

I first saw Marina on stage a few years ago when I attended my first Create & Cultivate event in Austin. It was then I discovered that she had gone from being an attendee at one of their past events, to then just 2 years later becoming the CEO and owner alongside Jaclyn Johnson. All because she believed in herself and took a chance in sending a voice note to Jaclyn with an idea. I mean, come on!!

I got to spend time with Marina to film inside her beautiful hotel room when she was visiting Toronto for a keynote at conference hosted by some mutual friends.

We sat down for an intimate chat all about her journey to CEO, what community means, being a mom, a business owner, a friend, her feelings on hosting at home, and how her family has shaped who she is today.

In just ONE year Marina’s entire life changed, and this episode is all about showing you how yours can too. Talk about BIG moves.

Funny enough, I also shared with Marina that as I sat in the audience at my first Create & Cultivate event, watching her speak on stage, I thought to myself “I’m going to interview her one day!”….and here we are. I also remember thinking that I’d love to work with Marina somehow, and fast forward to two years later and I was asked to shoot some attendee interviews at their latest event in Austin. I can’t make this stuff up!!! The power of connection works.

Marina is fun, inspiring, and real…and if you’re someone with a grand vision for your life, you’re going to love this episode.

This show is meant to be enjoyed with your favourite beverage in hand, ideally on a cozy couch. So settle in, and step In The Room with us. Enjoy!

🎙️ You can also watch or listen to the episode on Spotify, Apple Podcasts or wherever you listen to your favourite shows!

And if you liked the episode, please subscribe, comment, share it with friends…your support means the world to me!! The more people that get to slow down and savour long form content again, the better off I truly think we’ll all be.

I hope you’ll join me In The Room. I’ll be sharing episode 2 soon, and if you’re a fan of delicious treats, this one will be extra sweet!

Until we write again…

xo Palak

Up until now this has been a written series on Substack, but it was always meant to accompany the vision for a show I had. And today, I’m excited to finally share that vision with you. Here’s the story of how it happened..

I’m the proud graduate of a post-secondary Bachelor of Business Administration (BBA) degree from the University of Toronto. But truthfully, I don't think that's what I was meant to study. Deep down, I think I wanted to pursue journalism. I was even accepted into a journalism program at another university, but a business degree from a top-tier school felt more prestigious, so I convinced myself it would be the better choice. It was also where my older sister had gone to school, so following in her footsteps felt obvious.

Plus, a business degree always comes in handy, right? At least that’s what I was taught growing up.

Now that I’m in my 40s, I’m learning so much more about what I genuinely enjoy and where my strengths actually lie vs. what society led me to believe.

I’ve realized I’m far more creative than analytical.

I don’t enjoy building spreadsheets, and I hate dealing with operations, funnels, systems, or anything like that.

My favourite courses in school were the ones that involved writing long papers, reading books, or developing creative brand campaigns where I could tap into the endless ideas in my head.

Ironically, I got a 99% grade in statistics—not because I loved it, but because I worked incredibly hard and memorized what I needed to know. That grade actually says more about my work ethic than it does about what I was meant to do.

Looking back, the dreams I had for myself had one thing in common: they allowed me to use my creativity.

Over the years, I've found ways to tap into that. But I'd always end up getting bogged down by everything that came after the creativity.

For example, I knew from a really young age that I wanted to write a book, and eventually I did.

Writing the book itself wasn’t difficult for me. I could sit for hours, completely immersed, with ideas flowing effortlessly. In fact, in 2020 I wrote the first draft with my co-author in just one year.

But then came everything else that took another three(!) to figure out— pitching to publishers, editing, formatting, printing, marketing. UGH.

What took a year to write ended up becoming a four-year journey from start to finish. And if I'm being honest, those last three years often felt like a drag because I was spending so much of my time working outside my strengths.

Another dream I quietly held onto was hosting a show one day.

I know, pretty bold.

But I think the seed was planted when I was a kid watching Oprah every single afternoon and loved the idea of her having conversations with people, exploring different topics and speaking to an audience.

I didn’t pay much attention to it until my previous business gave me opportunities to be in front of audiences. I found myself moderating panels at my own events, speaking at conferences, appearing on more than 80 podcasts, and loving every single one because, to me, they were simply conversations. I was even invited by a brand to guest host a live show.

During each of these, I would have people come up to me after and say “wow you’re a natural at that!” or “have you ever thought of a becoming a TV host” or “where can I listen to your podcast?”.

I don’t say this to brag. In fact it’s the opposite. I think hearing other people reflect those things back to me made me wonder if I was missing something, as if I wasn't fully tapping into my potential.

So the inner voice of starting a show grew louder and louder. But I had no idea how, or when, it would become a reality.

Of course I could’ve just launched a podcast, filming weekly guest interviews via Zoom from the comfort of my office. But that just didn’t feel right. The vision I had was bigger…and if you know me, you'll know I have a tendency to make things a little more ambitious than they probably need to be.

I didn’t want to talk to someone through a screen. I wanted to sit across from them. To feel their energy. To be in the room with them — in the places where they live, work, create, or simply feel most like themselves.

Because I wasn’t just interested in interviewing people, I wanted to create an experience.

I reached out to some networks to pitch the concept, including Magnolia Network (the home of Chip & Joanna Gaines, whom I love!). I had some interest from them and was even invited to meet over coffee with some of their production team in Texas, but I was told it would take yearssss before this could amount to anything, and that it’s important I build an audience of my own. I was told the same by publishers when I was pitching my book. I guess this is the reality of the world we live in now, where you’re required to bring an audience along with your creative ideas.

So instead, after mulling on what my own show could be, I decided it was time to stop waiting and take matters into my own hands. Around that same time, I met a talented videographer from the UK who happened to be staying at our Airbnb. He told me he loved making films and had previously filmed a YouTube series for a well-known interior designer before moving to Canada.

Hmm… this feels serendipitous, I thought.

So I shared my dream out loud with him about a concept for a show I had. I wanted to film a season of episodes of me being in the room with my guests. I wanted it to feel less like a podcast, and more like a TV show. Something that makes you want to curl up on the couch with a cup of tea and savour what you’re watching.

It needed to feel cinematic, beautiful and inspiring.

He immediately saw the vision for what I was trying to create…and I hired him on the spot.

I think I just needed that belief and reassurance from someone else that I could make this happen and bring it to life.

From there, I was in a state of flow, feeling creative and starting to tap into it. I was leaving for a month long trip to Australia and Bali, and the day before I left, I wrote exactly five pitch emails to guests that I had in mind who I would want to feature in season one. I wrote from the heart to each one, closed my laptop, and spent a month disconnecting on my travels.

Three weeks later and every single one of them had written back saying that they loved the concept, and they were 100% in.

While I was away, I dreamt about how I’d film them, questions I’d ask about how they’ve built intentional lives and memories they’ve made along the way.

Once I returned, I locked in film dates with all of the guests, workshopped ideas with my videographer and set out to shoot this series!

Every single day that I spent filming felt like I was in my element. This was where I was meant to be. Preparing for each guest never felt like work. I would go in with some questions ready, but realized that one of my favourite things is simply having a deep conversation with someone, and I’d barely have to reference my notes. The dialogue flowed naturally, and the hours would pass without me noticing because I was so present in it. I loved every minute.

I wrapped filming of all five episodes for season one by December 2025 and I decided I would launch the series in the new year.

It seemed like the perfect way to step into this new era, especially since I had just decided I was closing my business.

What I didn’t realize was that I was about to run into the same challenges I had faced with my book.

Filming was the easy part for me. The joyful part. But then came everything after: editing, setting up the back-end systems across multiple platforms, building a launch calendar, marketing, creating social clips. I found myself immediately overwhelmed again. Not to mention that I had no idea if this is something I could monetize.

And so what I thought would be a quick launch turned into another six-month process before finally arriving to this point…

Introducing IN THE ROOM with Palak Dave.

This series is your invitation to come with me—into the experiences, conversations, and spaces that shape a more meaningful life.

Through intimate interviews, beautiful settings, unforgettable meals, and behind-the-scenes access to inspiring people and places, we explore what it means to live fully in a world that so often pulls us away from real life.

You’ll meet entrepreneurs, creatives, chefs, founders, tastemakers, and people building intentional, meaningful lives—not because they’ve figured everything out, but because they’re choosing to create with purpose. My hope is that every conversation leaves you feeling inspired to do the same in your own life.

This isn’t just about discovering incredible people. It’s about learning to ask better questions. It’s about slowing down. It’s about remembering that fulfillment isn’t something we arrive at someday—it’s something we create in the way we live everyday and the memories we choose to make.

I’ve realized that when you’re willing to ask thoughtful questions—and truly listen—you don’t just hear someone’s story. You often walk away changed in how you see your own.

Today, I’m so excited to share the official trailer with you.

If you're following me on Instagram, you may have already seen this, but through the letters here, you’ll get a more intimate look into the journey, and each of the five episodes from season one that I share.

If you’ve been familiar with my work for a while, you’ll know this show feels like a natural extension of everything I’ve been building—from community dinners around a table, to Beautiful Everydays, to curating and sharing spaces where people feel connected.

Because at the end of the day, I still believe the most meaningful moments in life happen when we choose to be fully present with one another. They’re found in conversations. They’re found in shared experiences. They’re found in the room.

I have no idea where this series will go or what it will lead to. I still have no clue if I can monetize it, or if I’ll be able to do a season two. All I know that is was a joy to make it and I didn’t want to wait any longer.

The journey of creating my book and now this show has taught me a really important lesson— that my best work happens when I’m fully immersed in doing what I do best, while I get help with the rest. It’s okay to need support. Maybe I’ll meet someone through this journey that helps further this vision. Or maybe I won’t. Maybe I’m a bit crazy for pursuing these wild ideas and working so hard to make them happen…but I think when you feel like you’re meant for more, you’re willing to keep going, no matter what.

I just want you to know that if you’re someone creating something of your own, I hope this reminds you to lean into your zone of genius, where you feel the most in flow, and find the support you need in getting the rest of the pieces to fall into place. One day, it’ll all come together.

And as for the show…the door is open. I hope you’ll join me IN THE ROOM.

🎙️ You can subscribe on YouTube, Spotify or wherever you watch and listen to podcasts.

And I’ll share more about episode one with next time.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

Back in grade school we had something called kilometre club and I hated it. During our 15 minute recess we had to run laps around the school field and for each km we passed, we would collect a popsicle stick. The bell would ring, and as we filtered into class our teacher would collect our popsicle sticks and mark down our daily kms on a chart to keep track. In front of everyone.

I always ended up walking briskly as the speedy kids in the class lapped me. Anytime I tried to run I just felt like my body was working against me. Everything felt clunky and uncoordinated, unlike the gazelle-esque runners making it look like the easiest thing they’ve done all day.

So since then, I simply stayed away from running.

But I admired people that classified themselves as runners. They were always investing in great shoes that kept them light on their toes, downloading apps to keep track of their progress and exchanging tips on great running routes. It felt like a community.

Stam had gotten really into running right before we met, and sometimes it would be -10C outside, and he’d still go for a run. I wondered what it was like to love something that much and it made me reflect on whether I had any passions that I’d push myself like that for.

Over the years we’ve traveled to dozens of countries together, and everywhere we went I would see people running. It seemed so accessible and like a great way to explore a city. All you needed was a pair of running shoes really, so occasionally (like every 6 months), we’d go on a little jog when we’d travel. I’m talking 15 mins.

Down the boardwalk at the beach in Rio De Janeiro, by the river in Seville, through the downtown streets of Sydney and Singapore, and around the tree lined neighbourhoods of Asheville.

A few years ago when we started spending winters in Austin, I was so appreciative of the warmer weather that I decided to try running more frequently to spend as much time outside as possible, rather than indoors at the gym. It’s where I started to actually enjoy it, taking in my surroundings and switching up my routes. Sometimes through the neighbourhood, and often around the gorgeous lake.

Even though I had been doing that, I noticed whenever the topic of running would come up, I’d immediately say “I’m sooo not a runner!”, despite literally having just gone running. Whether I was any good was beside the point, because in actuality, I was running, wasn’t I…so therefore, I am in fact a runner. Right?

So I started to do something fun. Whenever I would go running, I would at some point (usually when I was feeling really good) yell out “I AM A RUNNER!!!”. I’d say it a few times, just to really feel it in my body.

I am a runner! I AM a runner! I AM A RUNNER!!!

The more I did that, something within me started to shift. They say language is what creates meaning and by simply changing my language, I was able to change the meaning…and therefore shift my identity.

By telling myself I was a runner, I started to become one.

I even created a Spotify playlist called “Pal’s a Runner 🏃🏽‍♀️” with all of my favourite tracks to motivate me.

Now the thing was, I was still only running/jogging 3km max. There are a TON of hills in Austin, and it’s super hot, so whenever we’d be out running and we’d hit the 3km mark, I’d be breathless and ready to stop. I found it super difficult to get past 3km…and it was a miracle when I’d make it to 3.5km.

This was all the way up until this past March. I had only run 3.5km and with the 10K coming up on May 10th, I honestly had NO idea how I’d get there. It was freezing when we got back to Toronto so I was not motivated to run outside. I didn’t exactly create a training schedule, because I didn’t want to overwhelm myself, so about once per week I’d set out to run, and would always come back at around 3-4km.

I started to enjoy running in the cold, the air was fresh and crisp, and I realized why runners say that you find a lot of mental clarity and spaciousness while you run. I was enjoying that part, except that it was now the end of April and I had yet to even do a 5K!

May 1st hit and I was freaking out a bit. Stam regularly heard my commentary…

Why in the world would you sign me up for a 10K when I’ve never even run 5km?!
How was I even going to finish?
Looks like I’ll be walking most of it.

He’d always calmly reply with “babe, you’ll be fine”. But I didn’t believe him.

On May 3rd, with only one week left until the run, I knew I had to get my butt in gear. It was a cold windy morning, but I hit play on my “Pal’s a Runner 🏃🏽‍♀️” playlist and headed towards the beach. I ended up running 6.5km that morning! Woah, how did I just basically double my usual distance?!

That gave me the confidence I needed to know that I had this. At the very least, I could run 6.5km and walk in between. Okay, wait maybe I can do this.

I wanted to make sure my body felt rested so I didn’t run the entire week leading up to the 10K on May 10th. That morning it was sunny and beautiful, but thankfully cool enough to not overheat. I was nervous, but as we arrived I saw a sea of thousands of people…children, grandparents, parents, people walking…and I felt that sense of community that runners feel. In that moment, we were all one. A collective that had raised money for children with cancer, and were running for an incredible cause.

And so, it started. All the way from midtown Toronto, south down Yonge Street, passing by restaurants and shops that I love. Seeing the city in a new way, despite having driven by a million times.

I reached the 2km mark, then 3km, then 4km….and suddenly, I was at 5km and I was still going. Don’t get me wrong, I was not at all fast. BUT I was running, and I kept going, and that’s all that mattered.

Around the 6km mark, I hit a state of flow. You know, that state people always talk about where the inner dialogue and noise just disappears, and you’re in your element doing the thing. For the next 3km, that’s all I felt….pure flow. I wasn’t in pain, I wasn’t tired, I wasn’t breathless. I was locked in, and I was simply running.

By 9km I realized I only had 1km until the finish line. That’s when I saw the crowds, the strangers cheering, the cute kids holding up signs. It’s exactly what I needed for a final push. I crossed that finish line with everything I had left in me, and for the first time in a long time, I felt like I was part of something bigger than myself.

I know that to many, this isn’t that big of a feat. People run 10Ks all the time, heck people run marathons and ultramarathons. But for me, this was truly something that I never thought I’d do. The little girl in grade 3 who didn’t want to collect popsicle sticks would now have 10 to show for it. And that feels pretty good.

The biggest lesson for me out of all of this was that I realized I’ve been approaching all of my goals in my life with a 3km mentality. I’ve been playing small. Getting to 4km every time I ran felt impossible, and so, I just would stop. I’d struggle, I’d complain, I’d never believe I could do it. Until one day, I just did.

I tripled my distance all within a 2 week period. Not sure whether that’s what experts would advise, but it showed me that I could keep going for the 3km goals, struggling along the way over weeks on end, or I can reach for the stretch goal at 10km, and do it with ease and flow…in a shorter time then I ever thought possible.

Maybe all along I had a 10K in me, and I just never realized it was within reach.

So thank you Stam, for signing me up and knowing what I was capable of before I even believed it myself.

I hope by reading this, you start to believe in yourself too.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

And then… I burnt out.

This isn’t something I’ve ever shared, probably because I didn’t even recognize it was something I was going through while it was happening. But if you’ve ever tried to build something meaningful, something people feel, something that exists beyond a screen… I think you’ll understand parts of my story.

In 2017, I started a company called Embiria (meaning “experience”) that offered curated experiences before anyone knew what a curated experience even was.

At the time, I didn’t have a business model mapped out or a clear plan. What I had was a feeling — that people were craving something deeper. A place to put their phones down, step out of their routines, and actually connect in community.

So I started creating it through IRL gatherings: dinners, brunches, workshops, wellness classes. Anything that brought people together in real life.

In April 2017, my first yoga brunch event sold out on Eventbrite.
So I planned another… without even having a website.

That turned into 50 events in my first year.
And over 100 by year two!

From the outside, it looked like momentum. Like something was working. And in many ways, it was. But what no one saw was how many hours I was putting in behind the scenes without the return that I needed to justify this as a full time business.

My average ticket price was only around $50.
And I intentionally kept events small at around 20 people, because that’s what made them feel special. But that also meant the math didn’t really work.

But instead of acknowledging that, I just kept trying harder.

I partnered with hundreds of brands to elevate the experience for everyone attending. I worked with dozens of venues to create beautiful environments.
And I spent most of my time building relationships, trying to add value, trying to make it sustainable.

Eventually, people started to notice my efforts and it led to some bigger opportunities.

Agencies reached out to me to curate media and influencer events for brands like Bumble and Nespresso, and I finally hit my first $10K months!

I remember thinking, despite how much work it was, that maybe this is the turning point???

And then 2020 happened.

By that time, I had hosted over 300 events for thousands of strangers. And while I didn’t fully admit it to myself at the time, I was already exhausted.

The pause that came with the pandemic was, in a strange way, welcomed.

The world moved online, but I knew that wasn’t where my heart lived. My work had always been about being in person — the energy, the presence, the in-between moments you can’t replicate digitally.

So instead of forcing myself into something that didn’t feel aligned, I stepped back. And I wrote a book.

Beautiful Everydays: A Guide to Living in the Here and Now became an extension of everything I believed in — slowing down, finding meaning in the everyday, creating moments that feel like something.

That season was a return to something simpler that I think I was craving all along.

About two and a half years later, I felt the pull towards IRL again. The world felt more disconnected than ever and I still believed deeply that real-life connection mattered. People also started asking if I would return to events, so I came back.

But this time around, the landscape had changed.

Events were more expensive to run.
Venues had raised their prices after years of struggling.
Brand budgets were smaller, more cautious.
And people themselves had shifted — more hesitant to commit, more socially anxious, more likely to cancel last minute.

So I tried to adapt. Instead of focusing only on one-off events, I created a membership community called Embiria Social Club (ESC).

The idea was to build something more consistent. A space where connection wasn’t occasional, but ongoing. Where people could find community, support, and real-life experiences all in one place.

And I poured everything into it.

We hosted beautiful brunches, picnics, and casual meetups.
I organized giveaways, brought in guest speakers, planned retreats, and scheduled themed monthly connection calls.

We started smaller pods so people could build deeper relationships.
I invited members into my home. We had book swaps, cookie exchanges and wellness classes.

I constantly asked for feedback — through surveys, polls, and 1:1 conversations — trying to shape the space into something that truly served the people in it.

I tried to normalize something simple but powerful:
leaving the house even when you don’t feel like it
meeting new people
having conversations that expand you
hosting for connection, not perfection
spending a little less time scrolling

That was always the intention. But over time, something started to shift. We reached over 50 women, but then it plateaued.

The reality of running something like this — something built on humans, emotions, energy — is that it’s not static. People’s needs are different. And constantly changing.

When we hosted east-end events, people asked for west-end.
When we hosted west, people asked for central.
Weeknights didn’t work for some. Weekends didn’t work for others.
Wellness classes became requests for brunches.
Curated events became requests for more casual ones.
And when we brought back things members asked for — sometimes only a few would show up despite all of the planning that went into it.

Even events that were highly requested would have last-minute cancellations.

And behind every event were hours of real logistics — venue bookings, brand partners, planning, coordination, expectations. I found myself constantly trying to adjust. To optimize. To make it work for everyone. And quietly, without fully realizing it, I started burning out.

Not all at once. Gradually.

It showed up in ways I didn’t immediately recognize:
trouble sleeping
constant overthinking
endlessley ideating
feeling “on” all the time, even when I was attempting to rest

And eventually, the symptoms became physical — I developed a skin condition that seemed to appear out of nowhere but had actually built up over 2 years.

But I kept going because I didn’t correlate the two.

I still believed in it.
I cared about the women that were a part of it.
I thought if I just figured out the right structure, the right model, the right balance… it would click.

But that didn’t happen.

At the end of 2025, I sat down with my accountant and the truth became very clear: I wasn’t making income from this.

Despite it being my full-time focus.
Despite everything I had built, hosted, created, and carried.

Between platform fees, event costs, support staff, and time — it simply wasn’t sustainable. And it was taking a toll on me, physically and emotionally.

So in December 2025, I took a family vacation and gave myself some space from everything. For the first time in a long time, I felt like I had freedom, peace and ease.

It was so clear to me that after years of pushing to achieve something, it simply didn’t reach where I wanted it to be. Who I was when I started this first business in my early 30s isn’t who I am now.

So I made the decision to close the community. And something unexpected happened after I made that decision.

I felt relief.

For the first time in a long time, I wasn’t trying to force something to work.
I wasn’t constantly thinking about how to fix it, grow it, sustain it.

I was just… letting it go.

And I realized something that I think I had been resisting: surrender is not failure.

It’s not giving up on what you love.
It’s not saying it didn’t matter.

It’s recognizing when something no longer fits the way you’re trying to hold it — and having the courage to release it anyway.

I still love hosting.
I still believe in community more than ever. And I practice in my daily life. But maybe, for now, it doesn’t need to be a business. Maybe it gets to be something softer. More personal. More fun!

And the most surprising part of this journey?

The day that I announced my community closure, new doors started to open and I was presented with opportunities that just appeared.

Not because I pushed harder…
but because I finally stopped holding on so tightly.

If you’ve ever built something that didn’t turn out the way you hoped…
If you’re in a season where something feels heavier than it used to…
If you’re quietly questioning whether to keep going or let go…

I see you.

And maybe the answer isn’t always to push through. Maybe sometimes, the answer is to trust the ending.

Thank you for being on this journey with me. I’m so grateful for every single person that I’ve connected with along the way and who helped shape my first go at entrepreneurship. I truly wouldn’t be here without you.

But now, I’m so ready for what’s next.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

Today I’m recapping my experience at a Design Your Dream Life: Vision Board Workshop hosted by in her beautiful Austin home, and sharing her responses to questions I had on how she’s cultivated her very own dream life. So grab a cup of tea and get cozy… this is one that will truly inspire you.

Camille Styles is best known as a lifestyle blogger, author, and content creator focused on entertaining, wellness, home design, and simple, elevated living. She founded the popular site CamilleStyles.com, which features recipes, hosting ideas, interior inspiration, beauty routines, and mindful living content. She’s also a mom of two, wife and Founder of the home goods brand Casa Zuma.

Let’s get to the experience recap and get to know Camille better!

Life has a funny way of working out. When I first started spending winters in Austin three years ago, I deeply resonated with Camille and her beautiful brand—our shared love for finding beauty in the everyday, savoring small moments, no-screen days, and gathering with intention. Two years ago, I was honoured to be featured in her newsletter, sharing my favorite Sunday rituals.

Last year, I heard Camille speak on stage at the Create & Cultivate event during SXSW about prioritizing what truly matters. After the panel, I gifted her my book, Beautiful Everydays, with a heartfelt note.

This year, I knew I wanted to interview her for this In The Room series, and it just so happened that we were scheduled to arrive in Austin the week before an in-person workshop that she’d be hosting at her gorgeous home (which I’ve seen featured in magazines, blogs and her posts)…so I knew I had to go! I love anything to do with visioning and manifesting our dreams, so this was right up my alley.

I’ve hosted hundreds of events over the years, but as a a guest I share the same sentiments that you might have when going to an event by yourself—it can be intimidating! I didn’t know anyone else going, I wondered if it would be awkward attending alone and whether I’d meet anyone. I walked in (and her home was just as beautiful as I imagined), made my way to the coffee station where we sipped from Camille’s line of Casa Zuma mugs, and started chatting with a few of the other women there. Soon Camille and her mom both came over, and I immediately felt like I was at a friend’s house—it was so warm, inviting and casual…very much true to Austin and why I love it here.

We enjoyed a stunning breakfast spread and then all 20 of us nestled into the cozy living room, where Camille guided us through her dream life visioning process with a series of reflective prompts and personal stories. We had time to journal through some of the questions in our new Wilde House Paper Journals (which, as you know, I’m already a huge fan of).

I really appreciated Camille’s ability to create an environment where we all felt comfortable opening up and sharing amongst strangers. She sat cross-legged as she spoke about how this practice has changed her life, and welcomed personal questions that inspired deeper conversations around purpose, fulfillment, overwhelm and finding joy. In between, she made space for real-life moments, like her cute pup Charlie crying to go outside, and I appreciated how that set the tone for such a real and relatable experience.

Honestly, I could’ve spent the whole day there and I met some amazing women who I’m planning to have coffee with next week!

After the workshop I wanted to dive even deeper with Camille on some of what she shared, so I asked her the questions below related to the themes that came up that morning to get to know her even better.

P: Camille, you’ve built such an incredible brand over the years which seems deeply reflective of who you are as a person. Do you think you carved out your own path by following your intuition? How would you describe your work to someone you’ve never met?

C: Following my intuition has been the only way I’ve known how to build. When I started my blog back in 2009, there was no strategic plan. There was just this genuine passion—about food, design, entertaining, the way we create beautiful lives at home—and a desire to share what I was learning along the way.

What I’ve come to realize is that most successful creative projects don’t start with a business plan. They start with genuine curiosity and the willingness to follow one conversation to the next. So much of what I’ve built came from moments where I thought, “Wouldn’t it be cool if...” and then just took the next step to find out. Not knowing the full path, but trusting that my interests were revealing something important.

If I were describing my work to someone I’d never met, I’d say: I create content and products that help women build more intentional, connected lives—starting with the simple moments. Gathering around a table. Making your home a place you actually want to be. Finding breathing space in the middle of busy seasons. Whether that’s through my newsletter Breathing Space, my lifestyle brand Casa Zuma, or the workshops I host, it all comes back to this: I want to help people feel like they have permission to create beauty and meaning in their everyday lives without waiting for things to be perfect.

P: Tell us about some of the visions you’ve had for yourself that have now become your reality as you went through this yearly visioning process for yourself.

C: So many! I’ve been vision boarding for years now, and looking back, the specificity of what’s come true honestly still surprises me.

Years ago, I put an image of a beach house on my board—this dreamy California coastal vibe. I didn’t know how or when, but I kept seeing it there every day. And now we’re renovating our place in Malibu, what we call Zuma Beach House. It’s wild to see it becoming real.

Another big one: I had this vision of creating something tangible, a physical product line that felt like an extension of my aesthetic and values. That became Casa Zuma. And the most recent example—our CLAY dinnerware collection—started because we were ordering some tile for our house… which turned into bigger conversations with the makers… which led to a trip to San Miguel de Allende to visit artisan workshops, and suddenly I’m designing handmade ceramic dinnerware in a village outside town. I could never have planned that path. But I think that’s the thing about vision boarding: you’re not mapping out the “how.” You’re clarifying the “what” and trusting the rest to unfold.

The piece I always share with people is that your desires aren’t random. They’re clues. When you give yourself permission to really listen to them, and when you surround yourself with people who witness and support those dreams, things start to shift in ways you couldn’t have orchestrated.

P: What are some of the newer goals you’re envisioning for the future for both life and work?

C: On the work side, I’m really focused on going deeper rather than wider. I’ve spent years building platforms and launching things, and now I’m feeling pulled toward doing fewer things with more intention. More depth with my Breathing Space community. More time creating content I’m genuinely proud of rather than content that just fills a calendar slot. I’ve been reading a book called 10x Is Easier Than 2x and it’s shifting how I think about growth—sometimes bigger leaps require less effort but more focus.

For life, my visions are honestly getting simpler. More unrushed time with my family. My mom said something to me a few years ago that stuck with me forever—she told me that close relationships require stretches of unrushed time where you’re giving your full attention without distraction or being on a timetable. That completely changed how I think about presence. So a big goal is protecting more of that kind of time—with Adam, with Phoebe and Henry, with my parents who live nearby.

I’m also holding space for what I don’t know yet. I’ve learned to stay curious and follow the threads, even when I can’t see where they lead. Some of my best opportunities have come from saying yes to things that didn’t seem “strategic” at first.

P: You mentioned you do screen-free Saturdays with your family—what has implementing this done for you and what are your feelings towards social media and tech overall in today’s digital age?

C: Screen-free Saturdays might be the most life-changing ritual our family has adopted. From Friday evening through Saturday night, phones go in a drawer. Honestly, it felt radical at first—even a little scary. But now it’s my favorite day of the week.

What it’s done for me is simple but profound: I’m actually present. I’m not half-listening to my kids while scrolling. I’m not mentally composing a caption when we’re on a family walk. I’m just... there. And the weekly reset completely fuels my creativity heading into Monday. I come back to my work with fresh eyes and more energy than I had before the break.

As for social media and tech more broadly—I think it’s complicated, and I try not to be preachy about it because we’re all figuring this out in real time. What I know for sure is that when I’m on my phone, I’m checked out. And presence is the whole point of everything I’m trying to build—in my life, in my work, in my relationships.

So I’ve gotten really intentional about my phone boundaries. Notifications are off. I batch my texts and emails instead of checking constantly. My phone goes on Do Not Disturb and charges in my office by 8 PM—I use a Hatch alarm and read on a Kindle so there’s no temptation to check “just one thing.” And I moved Instagram to my iPad so I’m not mindlessly opening it throughout the day. It’s not about villainizing tech. It’s about making sure my attention goes where I actually want it to go.

P: What do you think the world needs more of?

C: Permission slips. So many of us are walking around waiting for someone to tell us it’s okay—okay to pursue that creative dream, okay to set that boundary, okay to rest, okay to host imperfectly, okay to want more from our lives.

I think the world needs more people saying: you don’t need to wait until you have it all figured out. You don’t need the perfect plan or the right credentials. You can start before you’re ready. You can give yourself permission to dream out loud and then take the next right step from wherever you are.

P: Where do you think your love of beauty and curation comes from?

C: I think it was always there. Even as a kid, I was the one rearranging my room, setting the table with the nice napkins, making things “pretty” just because it felt good. There’s something in me that’s always been drawn to creating environments that feel intentional—places where people can feel at home.

My mom definitely influenced this. She always made our home feel warm and welcoming, even with small touches. Fresh flowers. A thoughtfully set table. The message was always that beauty isn’t reserved for special occasions—it’s for everyday life.

P: What’s an ideal day for you?

C: I love this question because my ideal day is actually pretty simple.

I wake up before my kids—usually around 6—and have that quiet morning time that’s become non-negotiable for me. Coffee, journaling, prayer, reviewing my top three priorities for the day. I don’t look at my phone during this time, which makes a huge difference.

Then breakfast with the kids before they head to school—nothing elaborate, but that time together matters. I work from home most days, so I’ll spend the morning in focused creative mode—writing, planning content, taking meetings when I need to. I try to single-task as much as possible and batch similar work together.

Lunch is a micro-break I’ve come to protect. Even just 20 minutes of eating without a screen, maybe stepping outside for a quick walk. It sounds small but it resets my whole afternoon.

We have dinner together as a family most nights, and evenings are for hanging out, reading, watching a movie, or winding down. For me, the magic is really in creating those pockets of breathing space between the busy moments so the day feels like mine.

P: Anything else you’d like to share?

C: If there’s one thing I’d want people to take away, it’s that you don’t have to wait for everything to be perfect to start creating the life you want.

For years, I thought I needed more credentials, more experience, more clarity before I could really go for the things I dreamed about. But the truth is, every big thing I’ve built started with genuine curiosity and the willingness to take one small step. You don’t need to know the timing or the exact “how.” You just need to trust that your desires are revealing something important.

If this resonates with anyone reading, I’d love for them to check out Breathing Space—it’s my Substack newsletter where I share everything I’m learning about creating more intentional, connected lives. We talk about food, hosting, wellness, home, creativity—all through the lens of finding more breathing room in the middle of real, busy life.

More than anything, I want people feel permission to dream a little bigger and live their fullest lives possible. That’s what I’m always trying to do myself.

Thanks for being In The Room with Camille and me, Palak! Feel free to leave any questions or thoughts you have in the comments below so we can continue the conversation.

You can find Camille on Instagram or read her Substack, Breathing Space.

Breathing Space by Camille Styles

Your weekly dose of nourishing recipes, wellness practices, and inspiration to create the life of your dreams.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

p.s. In The Room is coming to YouTube soon! Subscribe here to be the first to know when episodes drop.

I don’t know if it’s the Year of the Snake that’s helping me shed what I’ve outgrown—releasing identities, patterns, and expectations that no longer feel aligned. But with the Year of the Fire Horse upon us, I can feel the shift. I’m craving more of what feels simpler, lighter, clearer, and I’m more willing to follow what makes me feel more alive. It could also be that I’m now in my 40s and doing things for the sake of performance and achievement feel less fulfilling than the things that make me feel connected, present and frankly, happier.

Typically my goals have been very specific (hello S.M.A.R.T. method). I would start by reflecting on the past year, highlighting the wins and challenges, and then approach the new year by category, ending up with about 5-10 new goals under each. I would then transfer these goals from paper to Asana, assigning dates to each to keep track and check in monthly. In the past, some examples have included:

• grow my Instagram audience to 10K

• write 2 Substack emails per month

• grow my paid membership community, acquiring 30 new members by December 31st

• secure 5 paid speaking gigs

• get my book, Beautiful Everydays, on a bestsellers list

• appear on 15 podcasts

• go running 2x per week

• host a summer party in July and holiday party in December for our friends

But as I browsed through everything I had jotted down in past years, I noticed that a LOT of these goals kept carrying forward each year because I wasn’t accomplishing them. There were many that I just didn’t achieve.

I have still haven’t hit 10K followers on IG, despite claiming that all the way in 2019. It’s been on the yearly list ever since.

I did not stay committed to writing 2 Substack emails per month.

I didn’t acquire the number of members I wanted. In fact, as the year came to an end, I had multiple cancellations from members looking to reduce their expenses.

I went running 2x per month for about 4 weeks and then probably ran 10 times total the rest of the year.

On the flip side, there were others I exceeded, such as:

Appearing on 40 podcast interviews in one year, instead of 15.

Hosting Friendsgiving, monthly brunches and 10 community events in addition the summer party and holiday party I committed to.

Not getting my book on a Bestsellers list, but selling 500+ copies and having people reach out with beautiful messages about it, plus getting into 2 major subscription boxes for this year.

The interesting thing was that as 2025 came to an end, I started reflecting on the types of goals I set over these past 10 years, and rather than feeling excited for doing the same for 2026, I began to feel discouraged. I no longer wanted to quantify things by metrics that don’t actually matter.

Why did I really want to reach 10K on IG?

Why did it have to be 2 Substack posts a month— and not 4, or not 1?

I realized that what I was chasing wasn’t coming from within, but rather external noise telling me what I needed to do to feel successful.

It wasn’t the numbers that I actually wanted to hit, it was the feeling behind them.

An audience of 10K meant that my work would be more widely shared and my voice could reach more people and impact more lives.

New members meant more women to authentically connect with one another and share IRL experiences.

2x Substack emails meant sharing my authentic, deeply reflective viewpoints more often in a world filled surface level content, and being consistent with the practice of writing that lights me up.

Making a Bestsellers list meant more people experiencing more beautiful moments in their everyday lives (and also a bit of trying to prove that self publishing can still equal success).

So this year, I’m reframing it. I’m not setting goals. I’m claiming everything I want to feel more of in 2026 and creating a list of things that will feel so fulfilling if they happen this year.

I started with 5 words that reflect more of what I want to feel:

ADVENTUROUS, CLEAR, CONFIDENT, TRANSFORMATIVE, VIBRANT

And then I made a list of FUN and FULFILLMENT which includes things like:

• going horseback riding

• taking hip hop dance classes again as I love to dance

• treating myself to a fancy facial at a hotel spa

• planning a wellness retreat day for my girlfriends

• reading fiction books (currently on my nightstand: Everything Was Good-Bye)

• a lunch date with my mom, sister and niece (last time we went to McDonald’s to try the new veggie burger which is SO not typical for us, but I hadn’t eaten there since I was basically a teenager and it was so fun!)

• getting cast for a commercial or production of some sort as I used to be an extra for film/TV when I was younger and really enjoyed it!

• calling friends spontaneously when I’m thinking of them

• doing an in person event themed around my book

• launching my new project with the world when it feels right

• planning our 10 year anniversary trip and vow renewal in Greece

That’s it. This is the extent of what I’m doing to “plan” for 2026. No Asana lists. No deadlines. No repeats from last year.

And interestingly enough, I know in my heart that this year will be one of huge transformation for me because I’m deciding approach it differently. Shifts in my business, my friendships, my identity, and my life. But I’m choosing to loosen my grip and surrender to create space for the magic to take place. Rather than telling the universe exactly what I think needs to happen, I’m letting go, and opening myself up to the possibilities. And THAT my friends, feels more exciting than any goals I could ever list on paper.

I encourage you to come up with a list of feelings you want to experience more of this year, and maybe even create a list of fun for yourself. What are some of the things that used to bring you immense joy, but you haven’t made time for lately?

*enjoy 10% off any of Wilde House Paper’s beautiful products where you can create your own list of fun with this link.

Life is about becoming our best selves, but sometimes, we need to ensure we don’t miss the moments in between all of the achieving we’re trying to do that we forget to simply live.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

p.s. If you do love a more robust goal setting process, I highly recommend checking out my dear friend ’s recent post on how she approaches her yearly reset as I have witnessed first hand her personal and professional growth and success over the years, and she truly inspires me and everyone around her to achieve their dreams!

I mean who doesn’t love a collective “let’s circle back in 2026” email?! The holidays give us the permission to pause, and I for one can tell we are all craving that more than ever.

Of course the holidays can also come with a lot of stress or pressure (especially if you’re hosting or navigating complicated family dynamics), but a few years ago I decided that since I adore this season, I’m going to claim is back and make it “mine”— meaning I’m going to fill it with all of the things I love that make me feel fulfilled.

So over time, I started infusing more experiences, rituals and traditions that tied to all of the festive fun I wanted to have in November and December, and honestly it’s been a game changer.

Every year these have now become the traditions I look forward to and derive the most joy from, and today I’m sharing them with you to hopefully inspire you to create your own, or steal some of mine!

1. Host a Holiday Open House

Skip the full dinner and the scheduling stress by hosting a more casual holiday drop-in party. Choose a late Sunday afternoon (since it’s the one time people likely won’t have other plans), set a 3–4 hour window, put out some nibbles and drinks, and let friends come by whenever it works for them. It’s one of the easiest ways to reconnect with people you haven’t seen enough this year. I’ve had so many friends try this out since I started doing it 5 years ago, and it’s the best way to host without the pressure!

2. Attend a Holiday Workshop

This is such a great way to slow down, unwind, be creative, and have a hands-on crafting experience. There are a ton of wreath making workshops or holiday activities like gingerbread house making happening at this time of year, so find one you love, grab some friends and go!

3. Holiday Hotel Bar Hopping

Enjoy festive cocktails or mocktails with friends at a hotel lobby bar or two—we’ve actually branded ours as “Hotel-mas” and it’s so much fun (here’s what we did this year). Get dressed up and let it feel luxurious.

4. Cozy Movie Marathon

Transform your living room into a cozy oasis with blankets and pillows on the floor for a holiday movie marathon. There are soo many new ones out this year—Champagne Problems anyone?

5. Plan a Romantic Pre-Christmas Dinner

Enjoy a holiday dinner with your partner a few days before the Christmas busyness of seeing family so that you can savour a quieter evening, just the two of you. I love planning our menu, cooking together and then opening the gifts we got for one another!

6. Neighborhood Drive-Through

Take a long drive through your favourite neighbourhood to admire the holiday decor, with a hot chocolate in hand and your best holiday playlist blasting. We bring along our dog too, and it’s so cute!

7. Holiday Market

Go to a local holiday market on a weekday afternoon when it’s quieter and you can stroll as the sun goes down. Pick up some gifts from artisans for loved ones, or treat yourself. I love discovering new vendors each year.

8. Have a Pajama Day

Spend a full day in your PJs with nothing else on the agenda. Do whatever you feel like in the moment—bake, watch movies, cuddle your pets, let yourself just rest. Best day ever.

9. Holiday Baking

Bake cookies and drop them off to your neighbours with a little note to sweeten their day. My neighbours get excited about this every year and it keeps me accountable! :)

10. Giving Back

Spend the day handing out coffee shop gift cards in small amounts to those in need of food or something warm. This is especially meaningful when I do it on New Year’s Day to spread a little hope and cheer, but of course it’s encouraged any time of year!

These are just my top 10 traditions, but I also love our annual Secret Santa gift exchange with my family, going to the One Of A Kind Show in Toronto and having a cookie exchange with girlfriends!

I’d love to hear whether you have any holiday traditions that you look forward to every year—feel free to share your favourites with me…they might inspire a few new ones! Or if any of these ideas resonate, I encourage you to pick one, slow down, and truly savour the magic of this season!

Until we write again…

xo Palak

Today’s guest is , Co-Founder of Camber, who I first connected with a few years ago when I found myself obsessively reading her weekly drop of things to do in LA, despite not even living there! We definitely share a mutual love of restaurants, experiences and community— all the things that make you want to go out and live your life.

Mady moved from San Diego to LA for USC and never left. Ten years later, her obsession with uncovering the city’s best restaurants and experiences became Camber, a media platform helping people explore LA with ease. They’re across social, Substack, hosting events, and just launched camberplaces.com to help plan your next perfect LA day.

Let’s get to know Mady better!

What was the original vision for Camber and what has it evolved to now?

We actually started Camber as a social app, kind of like a social version of Google Maps where friends could share their favorite spots with each other. To promote the app, we began posting on social…and that’s what really took off. Over time, we realized the community was responding more to the content than the tech itself, so Camber evolved into a full media company. Now we focus on sharing LA guides, hyper-local recommendations, and hosting community events across social, our newsletter, and beyond.

Tell us what a week in your life looks like—what do you love most and what would you change?

A typical week for me is a mix of creativity, connection, and (if I’m being honest) a lot of logistics. I spend my days aligning with my team on partnerships and upcoming content, filming daily, and writing our Monday newsletter. I’m constantly exploring, discovering, and curating. That part lights me up. I also love connecting with our community, whether it’s online or at the events we host.

If I could change anything, it would be the admin and operational weeds. I’m grateful for them because they’re part of growing a business, but they definitely aren’t the part that fuels me the most.

In today’s digital world of endless content, how do you keep things authentic?

I’ve shown up as myself from day one, and I think that’s a big part of why the content resonated. I’ve always treated Camber like a personal account. It’s meant to feel like a friend talking to a friend. That tone has stayed the same as we’ve grown, and I think people connect with it because it’s real, not performative. When people meet me IRL, they’re always surprised (in a good way!) that I’m exactly the same online and offline.

Does being on social media stress you out? Have you had to create any boundaries with it?

Yes, absolutely, it can definitely be stressful. It’s hard not to compare yourself to other creators or feel like you should always be doing more or being more strategic. The boundary that helps me the most is creating more than I consume. I avoid doomscrolling because it makes me anxious, so the only time I’m really scrolling is for research or content inspiration. That keeps me in a much healthier headspace.

What’s been an experience that you’ve had that made you think “wow, I can’t believe I did that…younger me would be super proud”.

Being on the red carpet for Netflix’s Nobody Wants This Season 2 premiere and interviewing the cast was a huge pinch-me moment. Younger me would’ve absolutely lost it if she knew I talked to Seth Cohen. Getting to collaborate with dream brands like Meta, Amazon Prime, Bumble, Spotify, and so many others has also been surreal. Those moments always make me step back and think, ‘Wow… we really did that.’”

What’s been your favourite brand collab? What would be a dream collab for you?

Amazon Prime has definitely been one of our favorite collaborations. It always feels so aligned. We love creating screening events with them because it gives our audience access to something exclusive that they wouldn’t normally get. Spoiling our community is one of my favorite things, and Amazon Prime has really helped us bring those experiences to life.

A dream collab would be with a car company. We’ve partnered with Waymo in the past and loved it, but doing a bigger digital series with a car brand would be incredible, especially considering how much time we all spend in our cars in LA.

Despite it seeming like you effortlessly do it all, what’s stressing you out right now?

Right now, the biggest stressor is scaling the business while maintaining the momentum we’ve built. I’m constantly navigating that balance of growing without overextending. I never want to do so much that everything ends up feeling subpar instead of stellar. Finding that sweet spot between ambition and sustainability is definitely what keeps me up at night.

So relatable! What happens when you notice you may need to slow down?

I can usually tell I need to slow down when I start feeling overly reactive or suddenly sensitive to everything. My energy drops, I lose my drive, and that natural excitement I normally have for what I’m doing just disappears. Those are the signs that I need to step back, reset, and give myself some space.

If you weren’t building Camber, what other work would interest you?

I’d definitely still be in entertainment. I grew up doing theater, so at my core I’m a performer. Content and podcasting scratch that itch now, but in another life I’m pretty sure I’d be a Broadway star or doing something else that puts me on a stage.

If you could describe a beautiful day in the life of Mads, what would it be?

My ideal day starts slow: sleeping in, then curling up on the couch with a romance novel and not looking at my phone. I love discovering a new coffee shop or restaurant, or driving out to Malibu to sit by the water and play Rummikub. I’d end the night at another new spot with my husband or close friends.

And honestly, a perfect day could also be a mini escape from LA. Little getaways to Ojai, Santa Barbara, Palm Springs, Laguna Beach, or Santa Ynez are my lifeline. Those trips give me the reset I always need.

If a friend were to describe you, what would they say? Is there anything you wish more people knew about you?

My friends would probably describe me as joyful, silly, loud, and outgoing AKA the person who brings the energy. But I wish more people knew how reflective and committed to self-development I am. There’s a much softer, introspective side to me that isn’t always obvious from the outside.

Congrats on recently getting married! What are some rituals or traditions that you share as a couple?

Every month, we plan a little surprise date night for each other, usually a new restaurant we’ve been dying to try paired with something fun. Our last one was wandering around Descanso Gardens and then grabbing dinner at their new spot, which felt so magical. Other months it’s been comedy shows, live music…anything that feels playful and new.

And every holiday season, we escape to Carmel and Big Sur. It’s our sacred, cozy tradition. The trip we count down to all year long.

What are your top 3 “do NOT leave LA” without eating here places?

Oh god, this is always the hardest question! We actually have a full LA essentials list on camberplaces.com, but if I had to narrow it down to three, I’d say: Budonoki, Anajak Thai, and Antico Nuovo. Those are the spots I recommend to literally everyone. You just can’t leave LA without trying them.

What’s your ultimate vision for Camber?

I want Camber to grow into something people can use anywhere: a trusted way to discover their next favorite place no matter where they are. The heart of Camber has always been authenticity and community, and I want to keep that magic intact while making it accessible to more people in a deeper way.

Personally, my dream is to grow Camber to a point where it’s not so tied to my face. I’d love to step more fully into the role of visionary leader, and eventually support other women in starting companies, whether that’s through investing, consulting, or simply sharing what I’ve learned along the way.

Tell us about some of your favourite things right now.

My favorite things right now are all the little luxuries and rituals that make my daily life feel more pleasurable. I’m obsessed with the Dedcool laundry detergent. It’s such a tiny upgrade but feels so special. I’m always reading a romance novel (currently in the middle of The Edens series), and I love using the Activations app by Mimi Bouchard on my walks to connect with my higher self.

I’m also very into my walking pad. It’s the best for getting extra steps in or moving stagnant energy when I’m working from home. For wellness spots, I love Silver Springs, Spencer’s Spa, and Open in Venice. And for pure joy? Watching Dancing With the Stars. It has genuinely become my whole personality.

Who is someone you’ve been in the room with that’s left an impact on you?

I honestly glean the most value from my fellow female founder friends. We can commiserate, celebrate each other’s wins, and lift each other up in a way that feels so grounding. Those relationships have been absolutely essential to building a company. It feels like we’re this little cohort growing up in business together. Their energy and support have had a more profound impact on me than any single ‘big name’ moment.

And finally, if you could be in the room with someone you’re inspired by, who would it be and why?

I’ve had the honor of meeting Nancy Silverton a few times (true LA food royalty) and that alone felt like a dream come true. I’d love to meet Gwyneth Paltrow because I see so many parallels between the way she built Goop and the way we’re building Camber. I’m fascinated by her ability to blend media, community, and lifestyle into something so distinct. And I’m always inspired by Tinx. Her dedication to content, community, and showing up consistently is something I really admire.

Thanks for being In The Room with Mady and me, Palak! Feel free to leave any questions you have in the comments below.

You can find Mady on Substack and discover LA’s best spots at Camber.

Camber

Things to do & places to be in Los Angeles

By Mady Maio

Until we write again…

xo Palak

p.s. In The Room is coming to YouTube soon! Subscribe here to be the first to know when episodes drop.

Whether you’re planning a cozy weekend date, a girls’ night, or simply want to soak up some local magic, here’s your guide to celebrating the holidays beautifully — from charming markets to creative workshops and everything in between.

Toronto’s Best Holiday Events

✨November 1 - December 25: Holiday Collective at Pop-up House

A cozy, light-filled space where community, creativity, and connection come together for the season.

✨November 1 - December 22: Toronto Holiday Pop-up at Curato

Shop curated home decor, fashion and lifestyle for all your holiday gifting needs!

✨November 1 - January 1: Christmas Pop-up at Aleria on Queen

Aleria on Queen has transformed into a magical Christmas pop-up filled with twinkling lights, festive cocktails, and Mediterranean food, making it perfect for a holiday dinner!

✨November 1 - January 4: Dyptique Afternoon Tea at Holt Renfrew Bloor

Celebrate the magic of the holiday season with an afternoon tea in partnership with Diptyque, inspired by the brand’s warm and woody Sapin (pine tree) candle.

✨November 12 - December 17: Make Your Own Glass Ornament Workshop

Glass holiday ornaments are cherished for their delicate beauty and timeless appeal and in this three-hour class you’ll have a chance to make blown and solid glass Christmas ornaments.

✨November 12 - December 28: Holiday at The Well

This season, The Well welcomes you to a Nordic-inspired winter celebration. Holiday at The Well is a free outdoor gathering space where friends, families, and the community can come together to enjoy a variety of curated programs and seasonal activities.

✨November 14 - 28: Holiday Hills at STACKT Market

Holiday Hills returns to STACKT market with a modern twist on holiday nostalgia, transforming a city block into a reimagined winter wonderland.

✨November 14 - December 20: Niemi’s Christmas Market (Fridays and Saturdays)

Featuring a free indoor/outdoor Christmas Market, as well as a ticket option to visit Gnome Land to visit Santa and ride the Christmas train etc.

✨November 15: Sip and Shop at Queen Books

Hang at Queen Books for an in-store Sip N’ Shop night with beverages and books and tunes and a 10% sale.

✨November 15: Holiday Shop Event at Euclid Farms

A morning of good old fashioned holiday cheer and the reveal of Euclid Farms’ transformation into a winter wonderland.

✨November 15: Crescent Wreath Workshop at Café ZUZU

Café ZUZUhas partnered with Botany Floral Studio to bring you a designer-led wreath making workshop. Enjoy a joyous-filled morning of creativity and delicious food.

✨November 15: Wanderlust at the Greenwood Cafe

Enjoy hot drinks and delicious holiday treats at the Greenwood Cafe.

✨November 15: Picton Night Market: Holiday Edition (Located in Picton, Ontario)

A festive evening of shopping, music, delicious food & more as merchants on Main Street come together to bring you the Picton Night Market! Merchants will be open for late-night shopping, with many offering one-night-only sales, unique handcrafted goods and complimentary tastings.

✨November 15: Christmas Open House at Country Roots Fresh Market (Located in St. Mary’s)

Enjoy an amazing group of local vendors at this annual Christmas market.

✨November 15-16: Toronto Artisan Market at the Shops at Don Mills

Stop by for a unique holiday shopping experience with one of a kind holiday gifts from local makers, good food, music, cozy fire pits, fun family activities and more.

✨November 15, 22, 30: Holiday Cookie Baking Class at Le Dolci

During this class you will be making 3 types of holiday cookies— Linzer, Thumbprint & Chocolate Crinkle Cookies! YUM!

✨November 17: An Exclusive Holiday Evening at The Ritz-Carlton

For one night only, The Ritz-Carlton Toronto opens its stunning Winter Market–style décor and ambiance, offering guests a private experience of the beautifully repurposed EPOCH Patio.

✨November 17-19 and 24-26: Merry Merry Motel Two Night Getaway at The June Motel (Located in Prince Edward County)

With all the festive good vibes you could wish for, The June Motel is hosting two curated weekends to kickoff the holiday season in Prince Edward County this November.

✨November 19: Tree Lighting Ceremony at The Fairmont Royal York

Watch thousands of twinkling lights illuminate our majestic tree while live music fills the air with holiday melodies. This magical moment brings the city together to celebrate the official start of the holiday season.

✨November 20 - December 22: St. Lawrence Winter Market (Thursdays to Sundays)

Taking place Thursdays through Sundays on Market Street, this free outdoor event transforms the heart of the city into a festive wonderland filled with holiday cheer, unique shopping, and seasonal delights.

✨November 20 - December 31: Miracle on Harbourfront

Miracle on Harbourfront will delight guests with photo-worthy holiday-inspired cocktails and alcohol-free beverages, a food menu featuring comfort food with a Christmas twist, and family friendly programming.

✨November 21-23: The Shoppe’s Christmas Market at Langdon Hall (Located in Cambridge)

Browse a curated selection of wine, gift baskets, holiday décor, spa treats, and more, and enjoy tastings and samples from some favourite local suppliers.

✨November 26: Cheese Boutique After Dark at The Cheese Boutique

An evening of festive fromage awaits. Indulge in seasonal goodies, and get a head start on your holiday shopping.

✨November 27: Holiday Hosting Workshop (Bathurst and Wilson)

Enjoy a beautiful grazing table & Lilly’s famous Latkas before a guided workshop where you’ll learn to create your own mini cheese or charcuterie board, build a Ferrero Rocher-inspired trifle and learn hosting tips, plating tricks & make-ahead secrets

✨November 27: Terracotta and Tinsel at Gusto 501

Gusto 501 transforms into a three-level winter celebration of Italian food, wine, and festive spirit. Each floor will offer a distinct experience, from winter cocktails and canapés to a chef-led dinner and fireside s’mores on our newly unveiled Mountain Vista Lounge, a rooftop patio pop-up.

✨ November 28-30 and December 5-7: Design Your Own Wreath Workshops at the Summerhill Market Event Boutique

Each guest will create and decorate their own 16” wreath, guided by the talented Summerhill Market Floral Team. The 1.5-hour workshop includes all materials and hands-on instruction, with 16 spots available per class.

✨November 29: Festive Candle Making at the Village at Black Creek

In this festive workshop, each person will make two 7oz candles and one 59ml fragrance mist.

✨November 30: The East Room Holiday Market

The East Room Claremont location is hosting their annual holiday pop-up market, featuring vendors such as The Health Hut, Pella Wool, Mikra, and many more… making it the perfect spot to kick off your holiday shopping!

✨November 30: Holiday Market at Trove

Explore a beautifully curated shopping experience featuring some of Trove’s favourite wellness and lifestyle brands. Enjoy lite bites and beverages as you browse, mingle, and connect with local makers.

✨December 4: Holiday Open House at Woven Styling Studio

A magical evening filled with festive sips and nibbles, exclusive shopping, gift with purchase and holiday cheer!

✨December 6: Holiday Wreath Workshop at Stock TC

Create your own holiday wreath while enjoying brunch & mimosas at STOCK! The perfect afternoon plan with friends and family.

✨December 13, 14, 20, 21: Breakfast With Santa at Hotel X

Step into the magic of the season with Santa and Mrs. Claus at Toronto’s most magical family event, hosted at Hotel X Toronto. From Santa’s grand arrival to a holiday-inspired breakfast buffet, face painting, storytelling, and photos, every moment is designed to bring joy, wonder, and togetherness.

I hope this list inspires you to slow down, savour the season, and fill the next few weeks with moments of joy, connection, and wonder.

🗝️ Be the first to get the Room Key

If you’re someone that loves discovering incredible events, restaurants, and finding new like-minded friends to enjoy them with, then join the waitlist to be the first to know about the launch of our new Room Key — your all-access annual pass to our In The Room community where you can attend exclusive events, meet inspiring new connections, and enjoy special perks and privileges.

Have an upcoming event that you want to share? Simple drop the details in the comments below.

Until we write again…

xo Palak

I don’t disagree. I actually think it’s become even harder post-pandemic. It’s complicated because there are SO many factors at play.

We aren’t leaving our houses as much. We’re feeling busy and drained and overwhelmed. Traffic is a nightmare. When we’re out, we’re not as open to connecting with people because we’re probably checking our phones whenever we have a moment alone. We’re not smiling at strangers or striking up random conversations. We’re more socially isolated and even socially anxious as a result of literally being required to stay inside and avoid human contact for a few years.

It’s wild the ways in which the world has changed, and therefore changed our relationships to one another…with friends, family, and even neighbours.

The thing is…we also feel that we lack time to live the lives that we want. After a busy day at work, it feels like it takes a lot of energy and effort to get ready, leave the house, drive an hour away (and if the weather sucks, make that 1 hour +++) only to meet up with a friend for a mediocre dinner, when we could easily just stay at home on our couch and watch the latest episode of With Love, Meghan, dreaming of when we would ever actually use flower sprinkles on our everyday dishes.

I GET IT. It doesn’t really seem like anything is in our favour to cultivate the relationships we want, and yet, we’re all craving the F R I E N D S-like bond that Rachel, Monica, Phoebe and the gang shared for years as we grew up with them.

I’ve shared all of these sentiments, and although I sometimes still do, I truly think I’ve discovered the simplest way to create better, stronger, and deeper friendships and relationships—it all comes down to rituals and traditions.

About 7 years ago, I decided to start a cookbook club. I wanted to gather a group of friends each month for a beautiful family style meal where we each bring a dish from the cookbook selection that month. After all, breaking bread together has historically been one of the best ways to form strong bonds. I told 2 friends about it, and asked them each to invite one or two additional friends that I hadn’t yet met so that we could expand our group and get to make new friends. A few days later, our first cookbook club with the 6 of us was born. We went on to meet monthly, sharing the most incredible meals, building deep friendships and becoming close friends over the years.

It was all anchored in one thing—the act of gathering monthly around a shared experience.

I started to realize that humans are meant to gather this way. We are meant to connect in person, to have rituals and traditions that we get to create, implement and honour. And in doing so, we create real relationships, community and a sense of belonging which is what we need in order to thrive and feel fulfilled.

It started with cookbook club, but I’ve subconsciously been using the idea of rituals to cultivate connections with almost everyone in my life, and I can truly say that years after doing this, I feel so blessed to have such incredible friendships and relationships that I’m surrounded by. After craving a community to call my own, I finally feel that I have found that, and I want the same for you.

I’ve put together a list of 10 rituals and traditions I’ve tried over the past 5-7 years of my life for you to find what works for you so that you can start creating the friendships and relationships you’ve always craved. It’s not about doing everything, it’s about finding your thing. I hope these inspire you:

1. Cookbook Club — as shared above. Tell a friend or two. Gather often and enjoy a delicious dinner where all you have to potentially contribute is an app or dessert! One of my favourites was the Magnolia Table edition we did.

2. Hidden Gems Dinner — every month my husband and I go on a double date with a friend and her husband to a new restaurant and I lovingly started referring to it as the hidden gems group which has now turned into a full on group chat. We each take turns selecting a spot that we think the others may not have discovered yet, essentially introducing them to a new “hidden gem” while catching up over a great meal. The restaurant isn’t revealed to anyone until the day of the dinner…whomever’s turn it is sends out the location of a meeting spot close by and then we all walk over together to unveil the surprise selection!

3. Summer Garden Party — Summer is a great excuse to get together with friends. Each year we pick a different theme and host a backyard garden party. This year’s theme was French Riviera and it was so fun to see how everyone embraced it with their French coastal outfits and enjoyed champagne and cheese all evening!

   

4. Co-working Group — gather a group to meet weekly in a café so that you can co-work together. If you’re self-employed this is even more beneficial so that you have a group of people to share with when it comes to what’s happening with work each week. When I first started my business, this was the highlight of my week and got me through all the times I missed having a team of 10 people in my corporate job!

5. Friendsgiving Potluck — it’s not always with the same people each year but it always involves Tofurkey (selfishly because I’m the vegetarian haha). We love hosting a friendsgiving dinner to show our gratitude for the people in our lives and I know how much they all appreciate it!

   

6. Thanksgiving Weekend Away — my mom, sister and brother-in-law all have October birthdays, so a few years ago we started going away for Thanksgiving weekend to enjoy the beautiful fall colours and celebrate together. It’s become such a beautiful tradition and we’ve enjoyed everything from cozy cottage stays, to Collingwood chalets and even a weekend at The Pearle Hotel. I highly recommend creating traditions with family to get in quality time and make new memories beyond just a regular dinner visit.

7. Annual Holiday Drop-In Party — this is one of my favourites. I really loved the idea of hosting a big Christmas party, but it was always tough to find a date that worked with everyone’s calendar during the busiest social time of year. So instead, I turned it into a drop-in party where we invite people to drop by anytime over the span of 3 hours for a nibble and a drink to toast to the holidays. We’re on our 5th year of doing this, and now I get messages from friends in October asking when our Holiday party is so that they can save the date. The drop-in aspect ensures there’s no pressure to commit, but at least we’ll get to connect with those we care about during the festive season because stopping by anytime makes it much easier! More to come on my other Holiday traditions in a future letter to you (yes, I have entire separate list just for the Holidays). :)

8. Third Space Girls Weekend — my lovey friend brought together a group of 4 of us virtually during the pandemic to have weekly “third space” Zoom calls. Since we don’t all live in the same city, it became an opportunity to truly connect and go deep on whatever was happening in our lives. Once we were finally able to gather again, we decided to plan our first IRL meetup in Prince Edward County since a few of us had never actually met in person! We shared a gorgeous cabin at Wander and our online connection turned into the most incredible weekend away of cooking, chatting, indulging at new restaurants and spending cozy time indoors (one day we literally didn’t get out of our PJs or leave the cabin). It was the most soul-nourishing experience and now we look forward to planning our weekend away each year!

   

9. Seasonal Celebration Days — a dear friend of mine and I are both self-employed and amongst our many life chats we were talking about how we don’t spend enough time celebrating and acknowledging how far we’ve come, but instead we’re always setting the bar even higher. As great as it is to be ambitious, it’s just as important (if not more), to celebrate the wins you’ve had so we planned a day to celebrate the two of us and all that we’ve done that quarter! We went for pedicures and a lovely lunch. It was the perfect girls day and the kind of leisurely afternoon that reminded us exactly why we work so hard!

10. Coffee Dates — Stam and I love to pick a different coffee shop or bakery to visit each week. We’ll go for a long walk with our dog, grab our favourite beverage or pastry and just stroll…catching up on our days or working through a challenge one of us might be having in our business. We both love the quality time and look forward to it each week! If you find that you and your partner have really full schedules, this is such a nice way to reconnect.

And finally, if you’re familiar with my work, you may know that I’ve written a book on simple experiences you can enjoy in your day to day (many of which were inspired by some of these rituals). I’ve also hosted hundreds of events and even have my own membership community full of incredible women who connect over in-person experiences, including a seasonal cookbook club and an annual holiday cookie exchange that the members love! So I’ve seen first hand the power of how these simple practices can truly change lives. It doesn’t have to be fancy, it just has to feel meaningful.

Whether it’s with your friends, your family, your partner or even your pet…a simple tradition may be the thing that you need to help you feel fulfilled again. All of these have brought me so much joy over the years…they have become my fondest memories and are the moments I look forward to most time and time again.

I’d love to hear about any traditions you have with friends that have become your anchor. And if you don’t have any yet, I truly hope this letter inspires something new.

Until we write again,

xo Palak

I’ve always believed that it’s only when you unplug, take time away from your everyday surroundings (ideally in nature), and also allow your mind to just wander, that you then truly get to tap into your creativity.

Over the years, that’s become harder and harder to do. It used to be so much easier because our environment made it that way.

On a long flight? Buckle up, no wi-fi.

At an all inclusive resort? No wi-fi, see ya in a week!

Out to dinner with friends and your Nokia? No need to check your phone cause there would be nothing there to check (oh how I miss that!).

Now? Wi-fi is available everywhere (including IN THE SKY, despite my refusal to use it), and your phone is pretty much your lifeline.

So, when we booked our trip, I left my laptop at home (!), deleted Instagram off my phone, pressed pause on listening to any podcasts PLUS I packed only fiction books to bring along instead of my usual go-to personal growth or business reads so that I could give my mind a break.

The idea was simple: the less noise I consume, the clearer and more in tune with myself I will be. And I took it to the extreme considering I do run my own business, I’m active on social media and I love learning. But I knew that if I felt incredible with just one week break, then I could only imagine what an entire month would feel like (read below if you want to hear about the lessons I learned from that experience).

Before my 16 hour flight to Asia, I polled my community to ask what they thought about this decision. A few thought it was crazy, but 90% of people said “that’s the absolute dream”.

We’re ALL craving more space for ourselves, more opportunities to be free from the digital overwhelm, more peace in our lives….but we rarely get the chance to actually do something about it. I needed to go against this default lifestyle we’ve grown so accustomed to so I could prove it was 100% possible.

Over the next four weeks I noticed so many shifts within myself.
Mind you, this is coming from someone who already has extreme limits on social media usage (max 30-45 mins a day, that includes posting for work), and boundaries that include not taking my phone on walks, keeping it away during conversations and meals, and barely consuming any news.

I can only imagine how someone who feels completely overwhelmed on the daily with their phone usage or screen time would feel after attempting a month like this (spoiler: I promise it would be INCREDIBLY BENEFICIAL).

The first thing I noticed was how many people were actually using their phones all the time, while I wasn’t. Given Singapore was our first city, and one that is very digitally connected, I felt like an outcast as I observed people glued to their devices. On the transit (which btw, is amazingly efficient and clean), no one made eye contact and everyone from young children to the elderly looked down at their screens just inches away from their faces, while videos played on an endless loop.

While walking, people held their phones in their hands constantly,

When we would go out to eat, all of the kids at the food courts and fancy restaurants had phone stands set up while the parents ordered food, but then often resorted to being on their own devices too.

This isn’t to place any judgement, just to share how jarring it was to be one of the only people to not be partaking in this behaviour. While I noticed all of this, I also noticed how much more aware I was of everything. As the days went by, it was like a fog had lifted—anything I observed involved all of my senses. I was so much more present and grateful for every moment of life in front of me.

Everything became more beautiful—the trees, the flowers, the birds, the butterflies, the sounds that I could hear because my senses were heightened. It might sound wild, but it truly was me reconnecting with the simple things in life. The ones that we are meant to experience and appreciate as humans.

We then spent 8 days in Bali, staying at incredible hotels like the Ritz Carlton Bali and Munduk Cabins which was up in the mountains and completely remote. At one point during our stay there, I was in the pool looking out onto the jungle and I was able to fully be there, savouring all of it for an entire hour. I wasn’t rushing to get back to my book or check my notifications, or even take a million photos. I rediscovered what it’s like to just be, and to soak in the beauty around me.

I spent a lot of time having conversations with the hotel staff during meals, and on car rides we’d talk to the driver and stop to chat with locals in the village. They told us about their rituals, their community and how much they feel such a strong sense of love and belonging in the place they live. I would share that I too am trying to bring that feeling to North America through my In The Room Membership and they wondered why everyone just naturally doesn’t feel connected the way they do.

It was a beautiful week of getting to reconnect with the things that matter in life. And I didn’t miss my phone or laptop one bit.

We went on to spend 2.5 weeks in Australia (where my husband Stam calls home having spent the majority of his life there)—starting in the Barossa Valley (a gorgeous wine region with rolling green hills and lots of animals!), then drove along the great ocean road, stopping in little towns each night while eventually making our way to Melbourne for a few days, and then ending our trip in Sydney.

What was incredible about this part of the trip was the long drives with no podcasts, but instead just some music to match the landscape, windows down, ocean breeze and sunshine on our faces. I love a good podcast, but I also realize how much of my time I try to spend maximizing it to be productive.

So instead, we slowed down.

We spent cozy mornings in a farmhouse, making breakfast with local produce and enjoying wine and cheese during sunset.

We went for runs on the beach.

We played cards at a coffee shop.

We saw kangaroos.

We wandered through alleyways and let ourselves get lost.

We picked restaurants without needing to plan them all out or look up reviews in advance…just letting our intuition and curiosity guide us.

We felt so free. So open. So ALIVE.

And I’m not saying that you can’t do those things when you’re digitally connected, BUT it’s the feeling of being digitally disconnected that allowed us to really look up, look around and fully live it. To not be tethered to something that isn’t honouring the moment in front of us.

The one thing I did use my phone for was to message friends and family any time something reminded us of them—to know that despite being miles away, we’re thinking of our community back home. We’d share a photo or a video, or a personal message which made it feel like they were a part of the experience with us.

Other than that, I got to enjoy a full month of freedom from a life that often misleads us to believe we have to be constantly on, plugged in, responsive 24/7 and consuming endlessly.

Guess what? We don’t.

I was still able to run my business, have multiple IRL events take place within my community membership AND grow my Substack (hi new Pen Pals!) while taking this time away.

I logged back onto IG after 4 weeks only to discover I had lost 20 followers…but when you literally gain more of life, your perspective shifts and those metrics begin to not matter at all. Not to mention I immediately felt overwhelmed and overstimulated with all of the quick videos (most of which weren’t even of people I follow), and needed to close the app immediately.

The best part of taking this month is that I’m still feeling the ripple effects after coming back home. I thought maybe I’d have some sort of epiphany or “aha” moment with my business while away, instead what happened was that I received so much clarity after returning. We often feel like we need to push and do a ton of work when we’re seeking answers, but it’s usually the opposite.

I’m suddenly more tuned in than ever before…I’m more decisive, more focused, more clear, more creative, more excited…much more me. I know what I want and I’m ready to show up in my business fully with an exciting new project I’ve been dreaming of that will be launching soon…all because I took that month to show up fully in life.

I think that’s the beauty of giving yourself time and space. You return back to YOU. And honestly, there’s no better place to be than that.

Until we write again,

xo Palak

I recently took a week off social (well, just Instagram because I refuse to even consider entering the world of TikTok). My break ended up being even longer, and this is what happened.

I know, it sounds wild. To think that one week off Instagram is even considered a “break”. When you run a business and it’s one of your primary marketing tools, it starts to become a bigger deal in your head than it is in reality. I know a LOT of business owners that feel like they can never escape it (spoiler alert: you can, and you’ll be better off for it).

I’ve always welcomed a social media break. In fact, I don’t think I’d be on social media at ALL if I didn’t have a presence for my business on it. I encourage people to spend as much time offline as possible enjoying real life experiences, which is actually part of the ethos of my work, after all.

Usually, a few weeks a year during Christmas holidays and when I’m on vacation, I log off Instagram and go scroll-free for the duration of my trip. And guess what? It’s always been glorious!

The first day or so, I find myself reaching for my phone of out habit. Filling gaps of time or moments of silence with noise. Blocking any chance for thoughts to flow freely with content I’m rarely even interested in, despite an algorithm that claims to know me better than I know myself.

I think about the notifications I may have, or the DMs/opportunities I could be missing because I’m not logged in. As if somehow my one big break will take place while I’m away.

But then there’s a moment where something magical happens. All of a sudden, I feel spaciousness. My shoulders drop a little. My thoughts stop racing as much. I’m breathing slower. My energy shifts and suddenly I feel calmer and more connected, both to myself and the environment I’m in.

It’s crazy that the average person spends nearly 2.5 hours on social media a day….which can add up to between 5-7 years over a lifetime!!!

Is that really how I want to spend literal YEARS of my life?!

I think I first opened my Instagram account in 2012. And here I am, 13 years later still using it.

One thing I know for sure, is that I have never heard someone say that they feel better after scrolling through their feed. Despite all of saved recipes that will likely never be made, life quotes shared, pet videos watched and vacation recaps from friends, time on social media doesn’t leave you feeling fulfilled.

What it does leave you is feeling a little (or a lot) irritated, a bit scattered, unfocused, maybe depleted, lonely, disconnected (ironically) and kinda down on yourself.

But here we all are—addicted to it.

Taking a week off social media but then coming back onto it fully doesn’t mean we have found balance or can have a healthy relationship with it.

The reason being is that when you’re IN it, you’re IN it. There’s no “happy medium”. Sure, you can set time limits on your phone, which you’ll likely ignore (I know I do). You can sleep without your phone in your room and make sure you don’t check it first thing in the morning. You can keep your phone in your bag when you’re out to dinner. You can take a day off social media per week.

BUT, then you log back on and BAM….you’re sucked right back in. And all the feelings from taking space away are erased in an instant, replaced very quickly with all of the reasons you wanted to take a break in the first place.

My social media breaks over the years have taught me a few key things:

1. Being off social media gives you the gift of time. Time to explore a hobby, time to slow down, time to connect deeply with loved ones, time to experience real life, time to just BE.

2. There is no balance. When you’re off social, you can experience all of the benefits, but when you’re back on, all of the negative things about it also come back. It’s sort of like a smoker claiming they only smoke socially. At the end of the day, you’re still smoking. Sure, maybe you’re not smoking a pack a day, but it’s still not good for you. Unless you quit completely, it still affects you in negative ways.

3. The only people that I personally know that love social media or still rave about it, are the ones teaching others to leverage social media. It’s the social media experts, the ones sharing tips on how to use the platform, the online coaches and the ones who promise you’ll get more reach if you take their course. I find this super interesting because we all gravitate to these online leaders—they have great POVs, engaging content, they show us that there is a path forward, a way that we too can have engaged audiences and loyal followers BUT what we don’t realize is this is literally their job and they make money because of it. So when we go to create content like them, or use tips from their course, it doesn’t always work out the way we wanted because we’re not selling social media. We’re trying to share our messages and gifts with the world, and putting that out into the abyss with the hopes that your next reel will land, is not always the most reassuring experience.

4. The more time you spend consuming content, the less you’re able to tap into your own wisdom. I think this has been something I felt the most strongly about recently. I often look to brands that inspire me, podcasts, fellow founders, etc. for “inspiration” BUT in doing so, I’m drowning out my own voice even if it’s not intentional. So when I go to create something within my own business, I end up feeling confused about what I truly want, doubting my ideas wondering if it’s the right path, or thinking about how much better someone else has already done it simply because I saw a video they posted. This is NOT something I want to feel as a creative entrepreneur. I want space for my ideas to flourish and to come to life, not noise to push them down and make me question everything.

I decided to take a week off social media because I’m human and it was time to take a break from all the things I was feeling, and the things I wasn’t allowing myself to feel. I wanted to space to spend time with myself and my own thoughts.

Plus, it was the beginning of August, and Summer in Toronto is something to be cherished. I want to make the most of my real life. I want to spend it doing things that fill my cup. I want to make room for new ideas, and conversations and tapping back into my inner knowing instead of getting swayed by SO much that’s on the internet.

So my one week break turned into 10 days, and honestly I didn’t want to log back in. I had so many beautiful experiences in those 10 days that made me feel like I was actually living. This is not to say you can’t “live” your life fully while you have an app on your phone, but I think we’re all aware of how many moments it steals away from us.

I spent a full day at Ste. Anne’s spa with my husband.

I was with family at a cottage for 3 days.

I visited a friend who lives 1.5 hours away and ate salad freshly picked from her garden…and didn’t take any photos.

I read a full book!

I watched the sunset.

I cuddled with my dog.

I wrote in my journal.

I worked on my rebrand for In The Room.

I did a lot of TBM Manifestations by Lacey Phillips (IYKYK).

I had incredible, present conversations with everyone around me.

Everything was more vibrant and my senses felt fully alive.

I think the reason that so many images of cute cafés, book stores, flower shops and farms are shared on social media is because deep down we are all craving a deeper connection to the world around us. The to the one that exists only in real life.

When I logged back in on Instagram, I realized that nothing had changed. I had lost about 12 followers, but life in the virtual world was still chugging away…endless streams of content to be watched or scrolled past. I missed nothing.

A lot of this is to say, take the break. If you’re not a business owner and you’re only on the apps to consume but you don’t feel great about it, then maybe consider whether you need social media at all?

And if you are on there to share your work, then you can still question whether you need to be. I’ve hired social media managers over the years, and although I do find it helpful to have the support, I still find myself tied to the outcome. It’s like the umbilical cord that you just can’t separate from, no matter how much you try.

I’ve found a lot of joy in writing to you here lately because it matches the pace of life that I want.

I can write a little, but pause when I want. Coming back to it when the thoughts flow again. I can physically move places. I started writing 3 hours ago but in between I went and enjoyed a coffee, spent time with my husband, and now I’m currently in bed with my dog keeping my feet warm and a candle by my side. I can create and write on a laptop without anything notifications being pushed at me unwillingly, which is refreshing in the online word.

I often question how long I’ll stay on social media. Whether the past 13 years of posting has been “worth it” and if I could use that time towards other unique and creative ways to share my gifts instead.

How long it’ll even be a thing, until the next thing…

Next week I’m headed on vacation to Singapore, Bali and Australia for 3 weeks and just the idea of spending nearly a full month disconnecting is something that is SO appealing to me. No hamster wheel to be on. No content to be consumed. It’s like the world is telling me, “so you enjoyed a week off social media…just wait until you experience 3.”

I’m excited to go within. To be across the world in a different timezone. To disconnect so that I can reconnect with myself.

I have big dreams and so much that I want to accomplish in life, but without actually spending time living it, I fear I won’t be able to make them come true.

I hope this letter inspires you to take the time that you need for you, too. Your life is waiting, go live it.

Until we write again,

xo Palak

There’s nothing wrong with wanting to do those things. And maybe this sounds restful to you. But, it’s become so clear to me how much we’ve changed as a society when it comes to plans—making them and keeping them—and the impact it’s actually having on us as humans.

When I was younger, my parents constantly had social plans with other family friends. Often made a week in advance over a landline phone call, they knew which aunty and uncle’s house we were going to for dinner that weekend, what they’d be cooking to contribute to the feast (cause there was always a feast), and who else would be there.

It was a huge part of my childhood. Weekly gatherings with other families, the kids all playing in the basement while the adults chatted and laughed upstairs. We’d often be out until 2am, falling asleep on the couch and not remembering how we somehow got in the car and made it to our bed.

This was the type of community that my parents had in their 30s, 40s and beyond. There was always something going on. A picnic. A potluck. A BBQ. A visit to Niagara Falls. A party. A “function” of some sort. Sometimes it was a drag as a kid, but looking back now, these are actually some of my fondest childhood memories.

They were constantly surrounded by community, and sure we had our fun family movie nights with just the four of us at home (usually on Fridays), but I don’t remember my parents ever really cancelling on anyone.

I imagine that’s because:

1. They actually looked forward to seeing their friends. It was probably a highlight of their week to gather with their community, a way to destress and fill their cup (and ours…up until we were old enough to stay home alone and invite our friends from school over).

2. They respected the fact that a LOT of effort went into someone hosting a gathering at home and that it would be a real disappointment for a host to hear that there was all this food prepared, and no one to enjoy it. They fundamentally understood this because they themselves would always open up their home to others. Unless you’ve hosted yourself, I don’t think people realize how involved it can be and how disheartening it is when you hear of a cancellation.

3. It just wasn’t as easy to cancel. If you were running late throughout the day, or something had come up, there was no cell phone to text from at the last minute. You’d need to make it home to access your home phone to then call and cancel. By the time you got home, it was probably too late to do that. You had no quick out. The ease of cancelling just wasn’t there, so, it was much more likely you’d stay committed and work out your day around the plan you had said yes to in the first place.

It was also much more common to drop by your neighbour’s house if you needed to borrow some sugar, or answer the door when friends came by with extra cookies they baked. As kids we’d be playing on our front lawn, and my parent’s friends would often pop by unannounced for a cup of tea if they happened to be in the area.

This was in the 80s and 90s. There was constant community. Interaction. Socialization. Connection. Things we all need as humans to survive, and thrive.

Fast forward to now, and things couldn’t be more different.

Just the thought of our cellphones ringing, let alone a doorbell, is enough to send most of us into a panic.

What?! Why?! Who?! How?! HIDE. IGNORE. You know the feeling. Anything to avoid engagement.

I’ve spent the past 10 years or so building community. Maybe I’m trying to replicate the joy I felt in my childhood, or hang onto the “good old days” for a little longer.

I’ve created co-working groups, cookbook clubs, made new friends by attending events, planned endless gatherings and host annual summer and holiday parties to cultivate ongoing relationships.

I even launched a membership community to bring back real life connection so that we can all feel more fulfilled.

But, over the years I’ve noticed the massive shifts in human behaviour. How our sense of community has dissipated, without us even realizing it.

Then feelings of loneliness, emptiness, exhaustion or irritability show up and we can’t quite figure out why. Many of which are a result of the lack of real connection.

From my personal experience, these shifts have entered us into an era of it being 100% acceptable to be flaky friends. Almost normalized, even.

• We make plans weeks, or months in advance with friends because that’s all that our “busy” schedules allow for. They have to make it into our google calendars, or they don’t exist. Ironically, we plan so far in advance but as we near the date, we begin to hesitate, questioning if we even “feel like” following through.

• We have learned to tune into our energy as a form of self-care (which can be a great thing), BUT this also means that if we’re not feeling it, it ain’t happening, despite the plans not always being about us (i.e. bridal showers, birthdays, etc.).

• Sometimes, we just don’t show up. We think that if it’s a group event or party then the host won’t even notice and it won’t make a difference. As someone that hosts a lot, let me tell you—it is noticed, and it does make a difference. If you got an invite, it’s because someone values your presence and wants you around. Don’t take that lightly.

• Same goes for last minute text cancellations. There is nothing worse than an “I’m so sorry, I actually can’t make it tonight!” text just mere hours before a gathering, especially when the last thing a host wants to be doing is looking at their phone anxiously seeing cancellations roll in.

• We make plans based on convenience. Traffic is crazy. Commuting is hard. We want easy. So, we plan around what works for us. It’s rare to hear a friend proactively suggesting that they’ll come all the way to you if you live on the other side of town, regardless of how much they love you as a friend. So people end up stacking plans (“oh I think I’ll be in the west end in two weeks so maybe we can meet then?”, or “let’s meet in the middle”, or maybe not even at all cause it’s just too hard).

• Hosting at home is not as common. Pinterest has made us all believe we have to be incredible cooks AND know how to create a tablescape of beautiful butter towers or else it’s too embarrassing to welcome friends into your home. So, you just don’t. But not spending time in someone’s home means missing out on a WHOLE new level of intimacy in that relationship—comfort, coziness, the idea of sharing a space that you spend so much time in. Our fear of judgement has us closing our doors to our home (and honestly, our hearts).

AND YET, we are saving photos of retro Italian parties with checkered tablecloths as hosting inspiration for someday, reels of recipes we may never make for friends, quotes on connection that we all crave, and voice notes to respond to later because we’re always catching up.

I can’t even tell you the amount of times I hear people say they are craving connection, but the willingness to do the things to connect just isn’t there.

That’s why I think it’s SO important to show up as the friend that you wish you had.

The one that is there for a special occasion like a birthday or milestone event like having a baby. Not because you always feel like it, but because it matters.

The one that calls when you’re in their neighbourhood and wants to pop by to drop off treats, just because.

The one that’s there to come over for a cozy tea because you’ve had a bad day.

The one that might be so sick that they have no choice but to cancel on the party because they don’t want to spread germs, but maybe they make sure to call at least the day before or mail a little gift as a gesture to say “I really wish I could’ve been there".

The one that thinks of you in the morning, and can send an impromptu text for dinner plans that night because wouldn’t that be nice? And maybe even drive to the other end of the city. Cause your friendship is worth it.

The one that might not have the energy to go out, but remembers that the last time you met up your stomach hurt from laughter and honestly, after the day you’ve had, you actually could really use a bit of that.

Community isn’t about convenience. In order to cultivate it, you’re going to be annoyed, or have to go out of your way sometimes. AND THAT’S OK. Because in the age of digital everything, our real life friendships are something to be cherished.

The irony is that every time we choose to see friends that actually fill our cup and give us energy (not the relationships that deplete us), we actually always leave feeling better than when we arrived. And then we say to ourselves, “I should really do this more often!!!”

Instead of spending time doing things that we guise under the umbrella of “rest” (ahem, doomscrolling and bingeing), we could be finding simple ways to stay connected to the people that we care about. Or cultivating relationships with the ones we wish we knew better.

I was interviewed for an article for The Everygirl on how to savour Summer, influenced by the European way of living, and this is what the writer Arianna wrote after being inspired by some of the shifts I shared with her:

I fell into the notion that prioritizing alone time and saying “no” to social events regularly was the key to living well. But instead of feeling happier, I was left feeling lonely and anxious. It wasn’t until I prioritized socialization again that I realized how important social connection is for my well-being; connecting with friends and family regularly brought me more happiness than alone time ever could. Now, I’m having a weekly girls’ night, hanging out with family after work, and spending one-on-one quality time with my husband. Spending quality time with the people I care about every day—rather than just on weekends—nourishes my soul and fills me with happiness.

I think we all need some of that soul-nourishing connection in our lives, and flaking on plans is NOT the thing that will get us there.

I for one know that I could have easily decided not to show up and write to you today, but, our relationship matters, so I chose to nourish this even if I wasn’t feeling like it two hours ago. I stayed committed, regardless.

And hearing from you will be exactly the connection that will fill my cup, and hopefully yours too.

Until we write again,

xo Palak

The other day I went to a clay pottery workshop with friends. Signing up for a pottery class is something that has been on my mind forever. Along with a number of other activities that I’ve put on my list of “fun things to try”.

The list includes: going to a rollerskating rink, signing up for a food styling class, learning how to make focaccia, taking hip hop dance classes, doing a cake decorating course, and rock climbing (although this one sort of scares me).

These have all been on a list that carries forward each year when I set my goals and intentions. And every year, they haven’t been getting “checked off”. Instead of spending time doing any of these activities, I’m guilty of using that time to work instead.

I wasn’t always this way. When I worked a corporate marketing job, I was able to find a better balance between work and life, saving weekends and evenings for social time, hobbies and rest. However, this is also prior to the world became so digitally connected, so I can’t say the case would be the same now.

Since I started my own business in 2017, it seems that I’ve forgotten what hobbies are. Which was a really stark realization given that as a child I loved creative activities.

I used to take art classes on Saturday mornings. I did gymnastics and baton (yes…baton). I had a little fashion kit where I learned how to design and draw outfits. I went rollerblading with friends. I scrapbooked. I rode my bike on summer evenings. I made friendship bracelets and would hand them out at school (ok well this one I turned into a business, selling them for $0.25 a piece…I guess I am an entrepreneur at heart?).

But the point is, I was having fun! Either that, OR I was being “productive” even as a kid. I do remember regularly winning aggie award at my elementary school, which meant I had collected the most stickers for the highest number of extracurricular activities a student could participate in during a given month.

Maybe I was always just an overachiever and now that leisurely activities aren’t really tied to external rewards, I’m less inclined to do them. More on my need to be productive in my previous post:

Once I started working for myself, it became very clear that the energy and time I put into the business will directly impact the results. There was no more relying on my team of 10 that I managed to help divvy up the work.

It was all me, and so, I felt like I had to give it my all.

And that’s what I’ve done these past 8 years. I’ve worked…a lot. And I’ve had a lot of fun along the way because I love what I do (not without having stressful times along the way of course). But what’s most interesting is that my worlds have all blended into one. My so-called “hobbies” over these years have included attending events, meeting founders and podcast hosts, going for coffee with people doing really cool things, hosting gatherings and exploring new wellness spaces or restaurants, but ALL of it is directly correlated with my work. And even when it isn’t, I somehow make it to be that way.

Every coffee shop I walk into I think “ohh this could be a cute spot for a Member meetup”.

With events I attend, I’m constantly evaluating what could have been done differently to elevate it even more.

And with every gathering I host, well, capturing pictures only makes sense because I want to share how meaningful it is.

So…what are my hobbies then??? Where are the activities that allow me to truly disconnect from work, immerse myself in something new, and soothing, and fulfilling?

Hobbies are SO important for our wellbeing—they help reduce stress and increase creativity. We know this, and yet, we don’t always make time for them…along with a lot of other things we know are good for us but don’t necessarily prioritize (exercise, cooking, journaling, meditating, screen free time, baths…the list goes on).

I do a lot of the things above, and I also do make time for things that bring me joy and help me feel rejuvenated—such as traveling, spending time with friends and family, going to the spa and taking walks with my dog, BUT none of those are hobbies per say.

I’m good at being able to find beauty in the everyday moments, and even wrote a book called Beautiful Everydays: A Guide to Living in the Here and Now which is FULL of simple, dreamy experiences you can enjoy at home to find more fulfillment and screen free time. Things like creating a café at home (which I literally wrote 4 years ago before it was trending on TikTok!), brunch in bed, rainy day walks and the art of tea.

BUT I’ve struggled with hobbies. The kind of activities I can commit to on an ongoing basis (weekly, monthly, etc.) that I’m truly excited about.

So earlier this year I promised myself that I would say yes to more activities that revolved around joy….just because! No outcome, no productivity, just for the sheer fun of it.

Enter my wholesome hobbies era.

These are the various things I’ve tried out, and I’m testing if any of them will stick.

I said yes to playing pickleball, something I haven’t stopped hearing people of all ages say they are obsessed with after playing just once. Including my husband, who invested in paddles immediately after the first time we played and will pretty much drop anything if he’s invited to pickle. I on the other hand, played a few times and enjoyed it, but I wasn't giving up 3 hours on a Sunday to pickle. So for now, I’m playing twice a month with a community group and I’m sticking with it for 2 reasons:

1. I can tune everything else out for the 2 hours I’m there and just focus on play.

2. I’m actually getting better each time!

Is it “my thing” yet? I can’t say for sure.

I’ve been playing card games with friends when we get together for coffee. I learnt a new game and I’ve been winning often (although that shouldn’t matter I guess…there’s the overachiever in me).

I've also been journaling consistently thanks to Wilde House Paper’s beautiful designed journals and online course that comes free with purchase that offers incredible prompts and reflections (feel free to use code PALAK10 for 10% off your purchase if you’re called to dive into journaling). The daily journaling practice has given me a lot of peace and clarity over the past few months.

I spent a few weekend afternoons baking with friends and that was a really nice way to unwind.

And then I felt like I needed to step up the hobbies because they still weren’t feeling like something vastly different from what I’d be doing in my day to day life.

SO I booked in a salsa class for my husband and I during the week of his birthday. Now THAT was different. I didn’t fully know what to expect but we did have an amazing time together just dancing and laughing for an hour. Maybe I should book us in for another?

And then when a friend asked me to go to a clay workshop, it was an immediate yes. I would finally get to do try an activity that seems immersive and creative…and it definitely delivered on that. There was something really beautiful about working with the clay, and more so the rhythm of using the clay wheel. As much as I was not good at it, it felt sooo calming to shape the clay and feel the textures.

I think the best part was just using my hands to create something.

To put my phone away, try something new, allow myself to be creative, letting my imagination run free…and then producing something really beautiful (not perfect) at the end of it…where I can say “hey, I made that”!

I’ve been having a lot of conversations with my community around hobbies, and I wonder if as a society we’re less inclined to pursue them because of the rise of technology. We are simply put—busier. We are SO digitally connected that we barely have time for social plans, errands or keeping up with laundry, let alone time to crochet.

In my moments of doubt, I look to specific friends as an example of those that DO have hobbies…and how they seem happier and healthier (interestingly, many of them are European).

One of my friend’s ACTUALLY crocheted the most adorable sweater for his friend’s new baby. Albeit, he’s also the same friend that plays waterpolo 3-4 times a week…and dodgeball and volleyball.

Another friend loves to garden and is always sharing how something new is budding or blooming whenever we chat.

And then I have friends who love to run marathons, go mountain biking, plan hiking trips and want to pull out a paddle board whenever they see a body of water.

One friend makes the most delicious sourdough from scratch as a regular hobby, which personally I’m very grateful to benefit from.

There are people who love taking photos, who ride horses, who paint for fun, who skateboard, who build furniture, who go foraging, and the list goes on…

I wonder if I’ll find a hobby that pulls me in so deeply. Something I just can’t wait to do again as soon as it comes to an end. I’d love this for me, and for you, because I think we deserve to experience that during this beautiful life we get to live.

While I write this, I also realize that maybe I shouldn’t be so hard on myself. Maybe writing this letter is one of my hobbies because I get to write openly and freely, and it’s actually relaxing (aside from the numerous times between my posts when I think “I should really write my next Substack”).

Although I know a lack of hobby ideas isn’t necessarily the issue, I’d love to hear if you have any and what they offer in your life.

Because it might just be the thing that helps me find mine.

Until we write again,

xo Palak

Lately I’ve noticed that I tend to catch onto things early. I started my Substack a few years ago simply because I felt like writing more on a platform that is about, well writing (versus one that was about amplifying marketing metrics). Not a lot of people knew what Substack was so I found myself having to explain it.

I wrote for a few months, and then stopped. For no apparently reason really except that I probably got excited about another project. Something I tend to do often as a manifesting generator (see human design if you’re curious, or if like me, you love to pursue lots of things at once).

My last post in 2024 was about how I met Jay Shetty and gifted him a copy of my book. Maybe I wanted to end on a high note? Or maybe I was scared the next letter to you just wouldn’t compare?

When I was in my early 20s I took my passion for food and turned it into a Wordpress blog, before blogging was really a thing. I called it Not Just Lettuce and it was my place to review the best vegetarian meals at non-vegetarian restaurants (throwback below). Remember, this was a time when being vegetarian wasn’t cool, Beyond Meat didn’t exist and everyone assumed all I could eat was salad.

Apparently it was also a time when I referred to restaurants as restos.

The blog really started taking off but then I stopped, likely because I just wanted to eat for fun and not worry about turning it into something productive that would deplete my creativity. This was before I knew that one day you could get PAID to eat at restaurants and share pictures of them. I’ve had multiple people tell me I was ahead of my time and if I just stuck with it I would have made millions as a food writer and creator. Well that would have been nice. There’s that manifesting generator energy again.

When I started my company Embiria in 2017, I didn’t want to say I offered events. They weren’t just events. They were thoughtfully, meticulously, intentionally planned intimate gatherings with a purpose of bringing people together to authentically connect. So, I called them curated experiences.

“So you’re an event planner?” was the question I got asked most.

“No, not really. I’m an experience curator.” was my response.

“Oh cool…would you be able to plan my bridal shower”

*crickets*

No one really got it and although I sold out many of my 350+ curated experiences over the years, people still couldn’t describe what I did exactly. “Palak hosts great events”. Fast forward to 2025 and every gathering is labeled a curated experience. Go figure.

When I decided to get back to writing on Substack earlier this year, it was with the intention of being able to write personal, honest letters to you, sharing a different side of me that may not frequent my Instagram feed because a photo caption can only go so deep. Trust me, I’ve tried but that 2,200 character limit is my nemesis.

When I returned to this space however, the rise of Substack was upon us. A very evident shift from the constant struggle of not getting anything seen on other social media apps thanks to algorithms no one will ever understand, to a place where you can protect your work, share directly with your audience, and guarantee that it will land in their virtual mailbox. And hey, maybe even get paid while doing it!

EVERYONE was starting a Substack. And if you weren’t, you were talking about whether you should. And maybe you still are.

I loved all of the writing that was happening. And I felt inspired to share openly and vulnerably which I did in my first “comeback” letter on Undoing Productivity.

However, what I didn’t expect was the stark realization that after publishing my Substack I was experiencing the same feelings that I would immediately have after posting on Instagram.

A few minutes after hitting send, I checked my email—someone liked my post!!!!

Oh wait, that was my mom. I mean, credit to her for having just turned 80 and being able to figure out how to like something on Substack from her one of two iPads she’s learned how to use (yes, my 80 year old mom has two iPads, and she watches YouTube videos of cute dogs that remind her of mine!). Hi, mom!

Ok next I got a restack!! But from my husband, who I think meant to just comment but somehow restacked as well. Super sweet and supportive, nonetheless (love you babe!).

Then another comment…from a stranger! I could suddenly feel those familiar waves of the social media rollercoaster…you know the ones where you put something out on the internet, and wait to be validated by the world? Yeah, those.

The highs of when your content lands and the likes roll in, the lows from when it doesn't (or maybe it would have, had Instagram decided to show it to my actual followers in their feed!!! What a concept! UGH).

And then I discovered the Notes section on here. Post after post from people I don’t know, many of which consisted of a version of the following that was oddly reminiscent of Threads by Instagram:

• It’s SO refreshing to be on here. This feels so much more authentic than Instagram—I can actually connect with you all! It’s my new happy place! Like a garden and we’re all just having tea!

• Hey algorithm, connect me to women 35+ who love pilates, matcha, books, personal growth and Substack, just like me. Is this you, drop your details in the comments and let’s follow each other!

And then there it was…

• How to grow your Substack account in 30 days from 0 followers to 5K

It took me about 30 seconds in Notes to realize:

1. Substack IS social media. There are likes, follows, reshares, notes, endless feeds of content (now including photos, videos, audio, etc.), limitless ways to optimize your following and more.

2. If you’re new to this platform, you’re likely seeing a ton of growth because there are massive amounts of people signing up each day and Substack is feeding you the content you want to see. I’ve gained 50 followers in just a few days…but is the growth sustainable? Do I even want it to be? I thought I was on here “just to write” as everyone else put it…

3. Just like every other social media platform, Substack still has to make money. It’s going to change, it’s going to adapt, it’s going to scale…and we’re going to have to do the same along with it, or else we’ll be left behind.

SURE, you can still write for the sake of writing. You can “ignore” the stats if you choose (although, I’d like one example of someone who isn’t paying attention to the numbers— if that’s you, write to me and tell me you exist!). You can decide not to post on Notes (but then are you missing out on an opportunity to amplify your reach???).

I am all for a fresh new start in a place that feels more wholesome and aligned.

I have been talking about the negative effects of apps like Instagram and TikTok for years. I have devoured and shared work by incredible leaders like Jonathan Haidt. I have spoken on stages about the importance of real life connection and community for happiness and fulfillment.

I have limited my time on social media apps, allowing for offline days, phone-free meals and digital detox vacations.

I have created content from a place of authenticity, refusing to succumb to trends and instead, staying true to choosing to post a single frame photo because I simply don’t want to create a mere 10 second video summarizing MY ENTIRE memorable weekend experience because that’s what the algorithm prefers. So what if it only got 30 likes!

I have, for the past 10 years, pursued IRL > URL and genuine connections over digital distractions…so much so that I have become lovingly known as the Queen of IRL (in-real-life) to my community and even launched my own private social network off social media for women to connect over shared experiences.

So trust me when I say, I’d love nothing more than a place AWAY from the typical social media apps that require us to be on the hamster wheel for visibility and impact with the people that have opted to care about what we’re doing in the world.

Substack can be one of those places, for now. We can have the right intention. We can all collectively hope that this is it—this is how we exit the other places that we know don’t make is feel so good.

The ones that have become SO noisy that we often don’t even remember 45 mins in why we opened the app in the first place (hello, doomscrolling). The ones that leave us feeling a little (or a lot) irritated, inadequate, unfulfilled and depleted.

The ones that have drained us…of focus, time, energy, creativity, moments with loved ones and real life experiences.

BUT let’s not pretend that over time, Substack will not make you feel the same pressure that every other social media platform has made you feel.

The pressure to perform.

The pressure to produce.

The pressure to stay relevant.

The pressure to adapt.

The pressure to amplify.

The pressure to MAKE IT.

Because isn’t that what we all want, anyway? Are we still writing for the sake of writing? Or are we writing because we want to feel seen, feel heard, and feel understood? I’m guessing it’s a combination all of the above.

For now, I truly enjoy being on here. I like our conversations. I feel more connected. I prefer writing to you with a cup of tea by my side on a Sunday afternoon in a way that is natural, aligned and authentic rather than opening an app that overwhelms me IMMEDIATELY. And I enjoy hearing how even in a small way, you too can relate to all the thoughts I’m having.

Do I want to post to Notes? No.

Do I want to create an Instagram post just to share what I’ve written here. Not really (but the pressure will likely make me do it anyway).

Do I want to figure out how to get more followers, faster? Not interested. However, if you are new here, hi! Welcome, so happy to have you.

Do I care to charge for access to this one day? I mean, extra income is always nice, so maybe? Isn’t that what all the cool kids are doing? How do I even set that up? Send help!

Do I want to learn all of the features I can leverage? Just the thought of that feels overwhelming.

Could it be possible that Substack won’t really showcase this post because of the subject line? Probably. But maybe they’ll prove me wrong…we shall see.

Most importantly—do I feel like writing to you? Yes. And so I’ll continue to do just that, with the sheer hope that you might just like reading what I have to say.

Okay, now please like and comment on this post. Subscribe. Follow. Save. Share with your friends. Share to IG. Make a TikTok. Restack. Repost. Retweet. Whatever you call it, make sure you do ALL the things so I can feel better about having put myself out there. THANKS, LOVE YOU!

Until we write again,

xo Palak

p.s. if you like being here and want to connect with me and other incredible creative, professional and entrepreneurial women in person, I’m hosting a beautiful CURATED EXPERIENCE in Toronto on March 30th. Join me at Permission to Pause: An Intimate Spring Brunch where we’ll talk about how much better life is when we step off the hamster wheel to pause and create connections and live in the moment, all over a delicious meal around the table. Is there anything better, really? See you then!

One night as I sat on the couch trying to find something motivational and inspirational to watch (more on my need for that, later), I came across Alone Australia—a reality show where this was the premise with 10 survivalists all vying for a prize of $250,000 AUD if they are able to outlast everyone else.

From the first episode, I was hooked. And not because I have any concept of survival skills (spoiler: I don’t), but because I was fascinated with the different ways that each of the contestants approached the situation.

A few people lasted anywhere from only a day to one week, and then there were about 4 of them that lasted over 1.5 months!!! ALL ALONE.

It came down to 2 contestants— Gina and Mike who both made it past the 60 day mark, which is WILD. There were literally 20 day periods where they ate nothing.

But the thing that was most wild to me was how different their approaches were to survival.

Gina became one with the land. She would regularly be singing, dancing, showing immense gratitude for the experience, and tackling things in the most simple way. During one episode she needed to pee in the middle of the night and ended up catching her first animal with her bare hands because her hunter instincts kicked in from starvation (hard for me to watch as a vegetarian), but she was sooo grateful to that little paddy melon for the nourishment it would provide her. Her most effective catch happened when she wasn’t “doing” anything or even seeking it out.

When emotions came up, like mourning the child that she lost, she would acknowledge them fully and wholeheartedly and let them pass. This wasn’t a game of survival for her, she had resolved that this was her new home and it became a spiritual experience. Less doing, more being.

Mike on the other hand had a very different approach. He did THE MOST. At the beginning of the game, he literally built a canoe from scratch. A freakin canoe, and his own gorgeous paddle, which he would use to paddle into the middle of the water to find better fishing spots. He tracked his time according to the sun, kept himself busy all day long with jobs and would actually take a “lunch break” (despite having nothing to eat), because he was working so hard.

He created his own fancy fishing rod. He set up a very complicated fishing line system with which he lost multiple fish because everything ended up getting tangled. And he even built TWO separate animal traps from wood and wove his own nets (all unsuccessful), PLUS made a fish smoker out of tree bark! He grew increasingly frustrated that all of his efforts weren’t amounting to what he wanted. He was so malnourished despite doing SO much…much more than Gina.

But guess who won the game? GINA DID.

And do you know why? My bet would be that it’s because she surrendered early on. She wasn’t forcing, and pushing and doing and exhausting herself. She was in a state of flow, one with nature and her surroundings, full of gratitude and ease.

Mike ended up having to leave the show because the medical staff told him his body was shutting down and it was unsafe to stay. He tried sooo hard, but in the end, Gina won with 67 days spent alone. During her interview, she actually said she was ready to be there for 90 if she needed.

Why am I telling you this? Because it was such a clear metaphor of life for me…and maybe at times, for you as well? I AM MIKE.

I’m obsessed with productivity. It’s not my fault, really. I was raised by immigrant parents who were so wonderful and loving and provided an amazing childhood and life for me, however, productivity was their survival, and so it became mine.

Rest wasn’t an option. And it usually isn’t for me either.

I make EVERYTHING productive, and I don’t give myself the permission to just be because I simply don’t think that’s good enough.

I push and push and push, and just like Mike, it doesn’t result in the things I want because I’m trying WAY too hard.

Mike had a laundry list of things he thought he “needed” to do, and I realized I have the same…but for my business. I feel like I’ve tried so much, pushed so hard, worked sooo many hours, and I assumed that one day, it would all click. It would all payoff.

But it hasn’t.

I’m STILL trying, waiting, hoping. Just like Mike.

Doing too much, without the return I thought I’d have by now.

In (just) the past 7 years I have….

Hosted hundreds of events and workshops but couldn’t fully create a financially lucrative business out of just small-scale events. So I created brand events for clients like Bumble and Google, and then the pandemic hit just as I started to see some decent revenue come in. I launched an online shop delivering experience kits to people at home but I realized I needed to sell insane quantities for it to be profitable. I hosted online workshops but didn’t love spending all my time on Zoom. I created sweatshirts and t-shirts and sold maybe 50 before deciding to pivot, again.

And I consulted for a wellness company in Portugal as their Chief Experience Officer. The start-up eventually closed down after I left. I joined a team as Co-Founder of an event platform, but they also stopped operating which in some way provided relief because maybe it’s not what I wanted anyway? I thought about getting a job over the years but keep coming back to how I know deep down I’m meant for more and I can’t imagine not doing work the work that I love. That I was capable of building something for myself.

And I spent 4 years writing a book, which I eventually self-published but despite selling 500 copies in the first few months and getting into Indigo and even meeting Jay Shetty and giving him a copy, I felt disappointed that I didn’t get to go the traditional publishing route that I had dreamt about.

And I switched from Mailchimp to Flodesk, and launched my Substack two years ago but took a pause likely because I was drained. I posted free weekly event round-ups on Instagram to get people out in the real world living their life and connecting with other humans.

And I curated dinners and brunches, and interviewed Founders and spoke on stage, and moderated panels, and was a guest on dozens of Podcasts. I built brand partnerships and even hosted events for brands I admire like Wildehouse Paper.

And I launched a membership community unlike any other I’ve seen so that women can gather, truly connect and live a more beautiful, present life in the here and now instead of waiting for someday. In-person events. Connection calls. Guest speakers. Member perks. Giveaways. We’re doing it all!

And. And. AND. The list goes on.

I’m doing ALL the things to inspire others to slow down and savour life.

But the craziest part? I still don’t think I’m doing it right. In doing all the things, I feel like I’m doing nothing. At least, not as well as I could be.

I still don’t feel successful and I am still waiting for “my big break”. But if you ask me if I have a specific target for when I’ll feel satisfied, I couldn’t really tell you.

A lot of people would say that Mike did amazing on Alone. He still made it to 64 days without giving up, and it actually wasn’t his choice to leave the game. BUT Mike didn’t feel like a winner in 2nd place. He felt like he tried everything, and yet he still couldn’t come first.

I too make EVERYTHING about productivity. I have lists for the movies I’m going to watch…but they should also be somewhat educational, inspiring or uplifting or else it feels like a waste of time. Avicii documentary? That counts. Check.

I listen to endless podcasts from experts I admire. New Mel Robbins episode? Check.

I read self-help and business related books all the time. 10x Is Easier Than 2x? Check.

I take courses and enrol in programs and hire coaches and set yearly, quarterly, monthly and sometimes even weekly goals. Check. Check. Check.

I cross restaurants off my list and rarely go back to ones I’ve eaten at even though I loved them. Then I ask for even more recommendations when I have enough notes to fill a lifetime. Check.

I do manifestation meditations, I make sure to get movement in 4-5 times a week, and I walk every day. Check.

I use a productivity planners and journals and notebooks and even the pomodoro technique. Check.

I have sooo many planning tools to the point where I’m overcomplicating all the planning that’s supposed to help with the goal of simplifying!!! Go figure.

I’m a productivity machine. BUT I’m not sure where that productivity is all leading to. It’s got to pay off someday….or does it?

My fear is that it’ll have the opposite effect. That I’ll end up in 2nd place like Mike. No prize money. No award. Just a bruised ego and a ton of effort, wasted because of focusing on the outcome rather than seeing the value of the experience and journey itself.

A friend once told me that just by reading my Monday Instagram stories in which I share what I have going on for the week ahead made her feel tired…and I’m only sharing about 30% of what I actually have going on in my life.

So I’ve come to realize that I need more Gina energy in my life. I want ease, flow, and rest. I want to surrender to allow things to unfold as they will anyway. I want to stop forcing and pushing.

Funnily enough, my word for 2025 is simplicity. I crave the focus of doing one thing, and doing it well. Or sometimes, doing nothing at all.

Maybe then, in the undoing, I will feel the most productive I’ve ever felt.

Until we write again,

xo Palak