This is no longer Return but it isn’t the new podcast yet either.

This short 3 episode season explores the space between things.

Where loss and letting go are embraced as part of the journey.

In this first episode, I’m sharing with you my shoebox of things I’ve lost but never *actually* grieved and identities that I stepped in to but never *actually* let go of.

I had every intention of releasing the new podcast this week until last week I was wide awake at 1 am and I couldn’t bring myself to do it.

I also got a wild 1 am whisper that told me to include a voicemail from my dad who passed in April, as a creative offering of my own grief, to share with you.

I hope you enjoy this creative expression of the liminal space of loss and letting go, straight from my own metaphorical internal closet and now out into the light.

Thank you for being here.

I adore you.

Caitlan

Return is getting a makeover, a rebirth, a new timeline.

I felt it fitting to have the last episode of Return be community focused and about Human Design and Therapy because that is really a full circle moment.

In this episode we (let’s be real it’s just me and my mic) covered:

• Can Human Design tell you what career you should have?

• Why your Authority and Incarnation Cross can offer insight without prescribing your path

• The biggest Human Design mistake I see therapists making

• How Human Design can become another tool for self-judgment—and what to do instead

• Can therapists ethically use Human Design with clients?

• Informed consent, scope of practice, clinical competence, and avoiding determinism

• Why Human Design should be used as a lens, not a truth

• Why a Human Design chart cannot diagnose trauma, ADHD, anxiety, or other clinical concerns

• How I think about combining Human Design with IFS

• What Human Design says is happening in 2027

• What the Sleeping Phoenix represents: individuality, inner authority, transformation, and authentic self-expression

• What it means if the Sleeping Phoenix is your Incarnation Cross

• How Generators can strengthen their relationship with their sacral response

• What to do when your sacral feels quiet or unclear

• Single vs. split vs. triple split vs. quadruple split definition

• What I’ve changed my mind about after doing hundreds of Human Design readings

• Why I moved away from one-off readings and toward deeper containers

• Using your design to create a business that actually fits you, rather than copying what other therapists are doing

Resource mentions in the episode:

1. Join The Expansive Experiment

Want to stop just learning about your Human Design and actually experiment with it?

The Expansive Experiment begins August 17.

We’re spending three days experimenting with our Human Design Strategy in our businesses, with a day to prepare beforehand and a day to reflect afterward.

You’ll get a daily email, access to our Slack community, and a chance to notice what changes when you actually put your design into practice.

It’s completely free.

→ [join us here]

2. Next Level Decisions
   My free audio course exploring Human Design Authority, decision-making, and the parts that can get in the way of hearing your own inner guidance.

→ [sign up here]

Listen to this next ↓

Human Design + Incarnation Cross Episode
Want to understand the part of your chart connected to life purpose and the larger themes you’re here to explore?

→ [listen to the episode here]

How I hold it in my system— the parts that judge me….

But how it often shows up externally as well… the parts that are AFRAID of judgement from the outside world.

The source is always, (usually) coloring outside of the lines, throwing away the checklist, not exactly following the rules.

So today’s podcast episode is a look at… how we define success VS how we’ve been told to define success

We’re going to look at the history of it, our own parts around success, you will have prompts to write your own definition and hopefully we’ll walk away feeling a bit more expansive and less boxed in to “traditional” success PLUS we are going to look at success according to each HD energy type

Because sometimes there is misery in following the rules.

Okay.. let’s start with a story that had me raising my eyebrows at the US question, “What do you do for work?”

And instead leaning in to the Swiss question, “How do you spend your time?”

The year was 2019 and it was a blistering August day. Fresh off the plane from my move and almost bleary eyed from the jet lag (and the emotions of changing countries).

I was at my FIRST official grill party as a newly minted resident of the beautiful country of Switzerland. Standing around a bonfire, a Swiss person , newer to me asked me how I spent my time.

Whoa. How refreshing I thought. I had rehearsed my US answer to the question people almost always ask to someone new: “What do you do for work?”

Job, Title, Status = all synonyms for how we relate to others

I wasn’t prepared for the question I received because — truth be told, I had spent A LOT of my time working.

“Umm.”. I stammered back to my inquisitor, “I really like to read?” (up at the end of my voice because did this count?)

“ I love to hike and be outside and… “(THINK OF SOMETHING COOL) a part of me said.

Living in Switzerland got me thinking, “WHO AM I without all the THINGS I”D DONE?”

In this episode, we cover:

• Why the question “What do you do?” shapes our identity more than we realize

• The surprising cultural lesson Caitlan learned after moving to Switzerland

• How family, achievement, and societal expectations influence our definition of success

• Exploring your own “parts” and the beliefs they hold about achievement

• The Human Design signature of success for each energy type:

  • Generators: Satisfaction

  • Manifesting Generators: Satisfaction + Peace

  • Manifestors: Peace

  • Projectors: Success

  • Reflectors: Surprise

• Journal prompts to help you redefine success on your own terms

• Why success may look more like presence, authenticity, freedom, and meaningful impact than checking another box

If this episode resonates with you, share your own definition of success by leaving a comment, sending Caitlan a message on Instagram, or sharing the episode with someone who could use permission to define success differently.

If you’re ready to stop overthinking and make the next aligned move in your business, applications for Power Move, Caitlan’s 7-day business intensive for therapists and healers, are open through the end of August before pricing increases.

Not the story my anxious parts are telling me. Not the highlight reel on Instagram. The actual numbers, the projects that are moving (or stalling), how my energy is holding up, and whether my business is still aligned with the life I’m trying to build.

In t…

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I did, in fact, see and talk to Human Design again. And again. And again until I became so obsessed I gobbled up every piece of material I could find on it.

The year was 2017 when we had our “plane meet-cute” on a popular wellness podcast. It was about six months later I heard about it again and that is when I went full send on stalking Human Design.

For many years, I studied it solo and didn’t tell a soul outside of a trusted friend or two.

You see, I’m a product of growing up in the 90s in the US and there wasn’t much room for “woo”.

Was I ashamed that I low-key loved it? I’m not sure but I also think I didn’t really know what to “do” with it.

[You read the title of this article, I presume, so I believe you are wondering when the therapy is coming…. we are getting there. Pinky-promise].

I gobbled up Human Design information like Uncle Eddy at the Thanksgiving buffet, plate to the brim with as much as I could carry.

Now, nine years later, the dust has settled on my learning about Human Design. I learned things about it. Check. That was fun… but what do I do with this information?

For context:

I’ve always wanted to separate my identities out and put them in neat boxes.

Partner. Friend. Therapist. Daughter. Human Design Nerd. Former Corporate Employee. Mom to a Toddler. Lover of Travel. Reader. Writer. Creative.

I never thought of these as concentric circles overlapping and filled with commonalities but rather as separate outfits to be pulled out and put on (and sometimes performed….le sighhhhhh)

So on to the doing and how we got here…

After a two am whisper during the sleepless nights of early postpartum, my soul could no longer keep things separated so neatly. The ‘outfit’ boxes collided into one another, contents spilling over like mismatched socks gently touching the place you keep your pajamas.

Bleary eyed, dead of night, half asleep, a knowing dropped in and said: “Internal Family Systems and Human Design can be used together, in unison” (this was something I had already started dabbling in) and the whisper was (and now it’s time you TELL the world you are doing it).

“You’ve gotta be kidding me”- My part that doesn’t want to be too visible for fear of criticism

“Wait, this could be SO impactful” - My part that gets really excited

“Um, but, like, how?!” -My logical part

That is how we’ve gotten here to me telling you my thoughts on Human Design as a therapist (& more see above) for the last decade….

1. Human Design is NOT Therapy.

Look…NOTHING is replacing the art of therapy.

No way. No how.

Not AI, not a Human Design Chart, not your favorite content creator who read one book once about nervous system healing and will now coach you to heal yours too for $5,000.

Human Design is not meant to replace the deep inner work of sitting down to be witnessed, to be held and to be radically honest with yourself.

Human Design can, however, help you have a different PERSPECTIVE on yourself, your story and how you’re meant to show up in the world.

Which brings me to….

2. Human Design provides language to intuitive knowings you already felt about yourself (but you were likely a wee bit scared to claim….)

I’ve sat with over 100 people and told them about their Human Design charts and a big majority of the time they always say something like…

“I’ve always felt that way”

“That’s exactly what I did as a kid”

“That makes so much sense”

Human Design gives you not only a literal map to yourself and your gifts but it gives you a language to help you validate those inner knowings and provide a lot more evidence to your parts.

Language allows for communication.

Communication allows for understanding.

Understanding allows for alignment.

Alignment allows for coloring outside the lines of the check box sheet they give you at birth AND AND AND AND AND actually building a big, beautiful, non-beige life.

3. Human Design can be used as an empowerment tool

I’m a glass half-full gal myself at a maximum, an optimistic realist at a minimum and I’m always hunting for opportunities to move away from being disempowered and into empowerment.

Victim → Victor

Life is happening FOR you not TO you and so on and so forth.

My interpretation of Human Design falls into this box. It can help you remember your gifts, your life purpose, your unique energy and as I type these things I eeeekkkk with delight because idk about you dear reader but my parts spend a lot of time telling me how bad I suck. So, if I can remember, for even 3 minutes these cool things about me, well, life gets a tad more rad.

4. Human Design can make you feel seen & understood

Look, I don’t make the rules of being human but it turns out, we are here to be witnessed in our own humanity. We want people to see us, to understand us, to KNOW us.

That leads to….connection. (Something we could all use a little more of but that’s a different episode, am I right?)

So when your parts can also feel seen and understood by learning about and knowing your Human Design chart, that’s a win, c’est non?

But wait! There’s MORE!

When you have a better understanding of yourself you can then open up to more connection to yourself and others.

Life is getting a tad more rad.

5. Human Design reminds you who you are

Human Design shows you the YOUEST version of you, which means the parts of you telling you a different story suddenly have a little less evidence to stand on.

Our minds are the greatest trickesters of them all and once you have your Human Design these stories don’t hold up as much.

“You’re so lazy!” - Inner Critic Says

Are you lazy or are you just designed differently and part of your gift is in how deeply you can see others not in how much you can do? Cough cough Projectors…..

6.Human Design is NOT meant to box you IN or to be the thing you hide behind

For all the optimistic wonder Human Design can bring, it’s also, at the end of the day, an experiment.

Information you play with and integrate.

It is not a convenient excuse for not taking accountability.

“Sorry, I’m a Generator and this doesn’t light me up so I’m done.”

I mean that might be TRUE and Human Design is not something you hide behind.

It can inform your direction, help you make better decisions, remind you of your gifts, help you work with your energy and everything I’ve already shared AND….

It’s not a box you fit into. We’ve contorted ourselves into way tooooo many boxes for tooo long now. We’re done.

You are still responsible for the direction of your life and your decisions.

7.Human Design gives you compassion for yourself and others

Last but not least.. compassion. When I say that Human Design can completely transform your relationships, I absolutely mean it and I talk more about that here.

Imagine knowing your partners chart and instead of personalizing their behavior you can say, “OHHH that’s why”. Side eye grin welcome but not required.

Compassion leads us to connection.

Better connection to ourselves and others. An unblending from our own muck. A way to de-personalize and instead move more quickly into understanding.

Purty cool, ain’t it ?

Will knowing your Human Design solve all of your problems? Nope not even close.

Ultimately, Human Design can be used to deepen our understanding of ourselves, enhance our gifts and steer our ship towards a meaningful and authentic life.

And for me, lads, that’s the whole point of being here, right now.

If you think Human Design is a cool addition to therapy, you might love this podcast episode I recorded about how I use IFS Therapy and Human Design. Listen here.

This conversation moves beyond gossip and into something much more interesting: how our patterns, relationships, and nervous systems shape the stories we create with one another.

We explore why certain people feel instantly familiar, why conflict can become transformational, and how understanding someone’s energetic blueprint can create more compassion instead of blame.

Whether you’ve watched Summer House religiously or you’ve never seen a single episode, this conversation is ultimately about relationships, projection, growth, and what happens when we stop taking everything so personally.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why Ciara and West’s charts reveal such an immediate sense of familiarity

• How astrology and Human Design can explain attraction beyond physical chemistry

• The growth opportunities hidden inside relationship conflict

• Why curiosity is one of the greatest gifts we can bring into our relationships

• How similar energetic blueprints can create both ease and stuckness

• The surprising astrological dynamics between West and Amanda

• Kyle’s Human Design and why his desire to DJ actually makes energetic sense

• How different energy types can unintentionally misunderstand each other

• What Kyle’s Uranus Opposition teaches us about midlife transitions, identity shifts, and personal freedom

• Why understanding someone’s chart can help us unblend from our own protective parts

• The importance of seeing people as more than the “hero” or “villain” in any story

A reminder we hope you’ll take with you:

Tools like IFS, Human Design, and Astrology aren’t here to put people into boxes.

They’re invitations to understand ourselves and each other more deeply.

The more we understand why people move through the world the way they do, the more compassion we have for them which means more opportunity for connection too.

Because every relationship is an opportunity for healing, if we’re willing to stay curious.

This is the final episode in our three-part Summer House series. Start with Part 1 and Part 2 if you haven’t already.

If you enjoyed this Summer House series, let us know! We’d love to know what show we should analyze next.

Connect with us:

Elizabeth Scott

Caitlan Siegenthaler

Running a private practice (or any healing business) isn’t just about serving your clients, it’s about sustaining YOU the person at the helm of the business wheel.

In this episode, I’m sharing one of the most impactful founder habits I’ve built into my own business: a monthly business retro.

Thin…

Read more

This is the question Elizabeth Scott & I ask during Part Deux of this Bonus Summer House Parts & Charts Crossover here on Substack.

We’re unpacking the parts and charts of the primary cast members involved in the West-Amanda-Ciara-Kyle scandal of it all.

What does the shared caves environment in Human Design between West & Amanda say about the future of their relationship (and the way they showed up at the reunion…. side eyeeeee) ?

Subscribe now

In this bonus episode we discuss:

• Amanda and Lindsay’s conversation through an IFS lens

• Why shame makes feedback so difficult to receive

• The difference between compassion and discernment

• Ciara’s emotional maturity and what her Human Design and astrology suggest about her growth

• West’s chart, his protective parts, and why public perception may be one of his deepest growth edges

• How Human Design and astrology can offer context without removing accountability

• Why understanding someone’s inner system can increase compassion without requiring agreement with their behavior

Whether you’re a Bravo fan or simply fascinated by human behavior, this conversation offers a different way of understanding conflict, relationships, and personal growth.

So grab your favorite summer beverage, bring up your group chat and get ready to listen and learn with this episode.

Highly recommend starting with Part 1 here if you haven’t already.

Connect with us:

Connect with Elizabeth here

Connect with Caitlan here

PS: Don’t forget to share this episode with the woo-curious reality lover in your life.

This week, I’m joined by licensed creative arts therapist and narcissistic abuse specialist Melissa Guttman for a conversation that completely changed the way I think about narcissism, self-trust, and intuition.

We explore why narcissistic people are often highly successful, charismatic, and influential, why narcissistic abuse can be so difficult to recognize while you’re in it, and how these dynamics slowly erode your ability to trust yourself.

Melissa breaks down the subtle signs of narcissistic abuse, the difference between emotional immaturity and true narcissistic patterns, why therapists often miss these dynamics, and what it actually means to go low-contact or no-contact with someone who continually harms you.

We also talk about intuition, betrayal blindness, gaslighting, and how healing often involves reclaiming access to what you already knew all along.

In this episode, we explore:

• Why narcissists are often charming, confident, and highly successful

• The “mask drop” that often happens in narcissistic relationships

• Love bombing, devaluation, gaslighting, and coercive control

• The difference between vulnerable, communal, and grandiose narcissism

• Why narcissistic abuse can feel so confusing and disorienting

• How narcissistic dynamics show up in families, friendships, romantic relationships, and coaching spaces

• The concept of FOG (fear, obligation, and guilt)

• Gray rock, yellow rock, low-contact, and no-contact strategies

• Why therapists sometimes unintentionally miss narcissistic abuse

• The connection between narcissistic abuse and losing touch with your intuition

• Betrayal blindness and the parts of us that learn not to know what we know

• Rebuilding self-trust after years of second-guessing yourself

Connect with Melissa:

IFS Witch Therapy Practice

Therapeutic Voice Lessons (You Are Song)

Melissa on Instagram (@fallengoldenchild)

No Bad Charts Podcast

Connect with Caitlan:

Book Power Move Here & Get This Current Pricing for Life!

Learn More About Power Move

Set up a Discovery Call to get 20 minutes of Caitlan’s feedback on your business

What does Human Design say about money?!

The fun thing about Human Design is that there is no money center. No secret place where if you just try hard enough, you will unlock it.

It will give you a map to where you’ve been conditioned, where you may be leaking energy ($) and how opportunities find you when you are in align…

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What happens when two IFS therapists sit down to process Summer House instead of just watching it?

In this bonus crossover episode, I’m joined by therapist, writer, and Practical Alchemy host Elizabeth Scott to unpack the Summer House reunion through the lens of Internal Family Systems (IFS), attachment, relationships, and parts work.

We talk about:

• Amanda and Kyle’s decade-long relationship through an IFS lens
• Why some relationship ruptures compound when they never truly repair
• West’s “ear stuff” explanation (yes, we go there)
• The difference between connection and intimacy
• What happens when protective parts take over a relationship
• Why Ciara’s growth this season deserves far more attention than she’s getting
• The emotional aftermath of the reunion and what never really got addressed

Along the way, we explore a question we couldn’t stop thinking about:

What if reality TV came with actual therapeutic support?

This is Part 1 of what has accidentally become a much larger conversation. In future episodes, we’ll dive into Amanda and Ciara’s friendship, the fallout between Ciara and West, and—*because we couldn’t help ourselves*—the astrology and Human Design charts of the cast.

If you’ve ever watched reality TV and thought, “Someone needs to get these people into therapy,“ this episode is for you.

Grab your Loverboy, your journal, or both.

We’re going in.

So they get into “jobs” like: The Caretaker, The Planner, The “Hard” Worker, The Researcher, etc so that we don’t have to feel pain or hurt or shame or any other “difficult” emotion.

What happens though when that part feels like your intuition? Or is intuition-adjacent? Which thing do we listen to & why?

This recent Return podcast episode explores all of those questions and is the final episode in the Intuitive Series.

In this episode, we discuss:

• Why trauma can disconnect us from our bodies and intuitive knowing

• The role protective parts play in decision-making

• Common protective parts like the perfectionist, overworker, caretaker, avoider, and researcher

• How to distinguish intuition from anxiety, fear, and protective strategies

• Why intuition often feels quiet, clear, and grounded

• How grief, motherhood, stress, and major life transitions can impact self-trust

• Signs you’re rebuilding a stronger relationship with your intuition

• The connection between Human Design, body awareness, and intuitive decision-making

You’ll hear reflections on:

• My own journey rebuilding trust in my instincts after years of overriding them

• How old wounds can continue influencing present-day decisions

• The difference between seeking certainty and practicing self-trust

• Why reconnecting with intuition often requires more safety—not more information

Mentioned in this episode:

• Episode 110: Why Highly Intuitive People Stop Trusting Themselves

• Episode 111: The Therapist Edge with Natalie Deering

• Episode 112: What Human Design Says About Your Intuition

• Episode 89: What has to go? Discernment: A Virgo Season Virtue We All Need Right Now

• work with me here

This podcast episode is #3 in the Intuition Series on the Return podcast and in this one we explore what specifically Human Design says and shows us about where our intuition is in our bodies and how to use it.

My parts find this much easier to understand and I hope yours do too.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why most people have been conditioned to distrust their intuition

• The difference between intuition, anxiety, urgency, and overthinking

• How each Human Design authority receives intuitive information

• What your centers reveal about your unique intuitive gifts

• The role of the Spleen, Sacral, Emotional Solar Plexus, G Center, Ajna, Root, and Throat in intuitive awareness

• How defined and undefined centers influence intuition differently

• Why nervous system healing strengthens intuitive connection

• Common ways trauma and protective parts interfere with self-trust

• Practical ways to start rebuilding your relationship with intuition today

Chapters:

00:00 Welcome back to the Intuition Series

04:02 What intuition actually looks like (and why it’s usually not a lightning bolt)

09:45 Understanding Human Design authorities and intuitive decision-making

18:30 How the centers shape your intuition

35:30 Urgency, anxiety, and other things we mistake for intuition

43:30 Trauma, nervous systems, and losing touch with your inner knowing

50:20 Practical ways to strengthen intuition and rebuild self-trust

Links & Resources:

✨ Learn how you’re uniquely designed to make decisions: Next Level Decisions (Free Audio Course)

⚡ Ready for clarity, momentum, and your next big move? Power Move Intensive

🌙 Explore more episodes, resources, and offerings: www.caitlansiegenthaler.com

Episode 1 (110) in the Intuitive Series

Episode 2 (111) in the Intuitive Series

Support the show

This episode is for the therapists, helpers, highly sensitive humans, and intuitive people who’ve felt something deeper happening in the room and are ready to trust themselves a little more.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• How Natalie discovered therapy was her path

• The connection between IFS and intuitive development

• What “self-energy” actually feels like

• How intuition can show up through images, sensations, and inner knowing

• Why many therapists suppress their intuitive gifts

• How Natalie uses intuition ethically in therapy sessions

• What Theta Healing is and how it overlaps with IFS

• The importance of mentorship in intuitive work

• Why creativity and art can reconnect us to ourselves

Chapters:

00:00 – “I Am Light” & self-energy as a song
03:30 – Natalie’s journey into becoming a therapist
08:00 – Human Design, generators & following what lights you up
11:30 – Therapy, intuition & evolving clinical work
15:00 – Discovering intuitive gifts through IFS & Theta Healing
20:00 – Practicing intuitive discernment
23:00 – Why mentorship matters in intuitive work
27:00 – Using intuition ethically in therapy sessions
35:00 – What Theta Healing actually is
43:00 – Creativity, spirituality & weaving modalities together
45:00 – The parts Natalie is holding close right now
46:30 – Pottery, presence & returning to yourself

Links & Resources:

• Connect with Natalie on her website & instagram

• Listen to the Intuitive Self Podcast

• Learn more about Caitlan’s work: Caitlan Siegenthaler Website

This episode is the story of that knowing and the years of work it took to even HEAR that “knowing” let alone trust it again.

If you’ve ever felt something that couldn’t be explained but you’ve found it difficult to trust that knowing in a logical world…..this episode is for you.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why intuition often gets dismissed in highly logical or professional environments

• The difference between intuition, fear, anxiety, and trauma responses

• How narcissistic or emotionally invalidating relationships disconnect us from our inner knowing

• The role Human Design, IFS, spirituality, and healing work can play in reconnecting to intuition

• Caitlan’s deeply personal story of intuitively sensing her father’s illness and passing

• The ways grief can heighten intuitive sensitivity and connection

• Why reconnecting with intuition requires unlearning as much as learning

Chapters:

02:45 — Mercury signs, astrology, and how we receive intuitive information
06:10 — What intuition actually feels like
08:02 — Intuitive vampires, gaslighting, and losing trust in yourself
11:30 — Anxiety vs. intuition: how to tell the difference
14:28 — Why reconnecting to intuition isn’t just meditation and journaling
16:40 — Childhood intuition, energy sensitivity, and early spiritual experiences
19:15 — Healing, IFS, and rebuilding a relationship with intuition
24:10 — Spirit guides, flickering lights, and messages from her grandmother
27:05 — The intuitive knowing before her father’s diagnosis
29:10 — Sensing the timing of his passing before medical professionals did
31:25 — Dreams, grief, and learning to trust inner knowing

Links & Resources:

• Follow Aycee Brown on Instagram for the Mercury intuition post that inspired this episode

• Explore Caitlan’s work + current offerings at Caitlan Siegenthaler

• Book your Power Move

• Subscribe to Return+ for bonus episodes, essays, and deeper conversations

Support the show

In this special crossover episode between the Return Podcast and Self Trust Podcast, Caitlan sits down with Emily Romero for a deeply honest, behind-the-scenes conversation about what it actually takes to do “the thing” that’s been calling you.

Together, they explore the messy middle between knowing and doing, the role of self-trust, and what it looks like to build a business (and life) that actually reflects who you are. Plus, Caitlan gives a live, on-the-spot demo for Emily, offering a real-time glimpse into what it’s like to work inside Power Move.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why knowing yourself isn’t enough and what actually creates momentum

• How Human Design and Internal Family Systems work together in business decisions

• Why “doing the thing” rarely looks clean, linear, or logical

• How to navigate fear, doubt, and resistance when stepping into something new

• What aligned action actually looks like in real life (not just on Instagram)

• Why short, high-impact containers can be more effective than long-term work (depending on your design)

• The power of self-trust—and how it’s built over time

Chapters:
00:00 – Welcome + crossover episode intro
02:00 – What “Return” and “Self Trust” are really about
04:00 – Human Design in action (Manifestor + Projector dynamics)
06:30 – Inside Caitlan’s Power Move intensive
11:00 – Why traditional business advice didn’t work
15:30 – The 2am “download” that changed everything
18:30 – Self-trust, fear, and doing the thing anyway
24:00 – From therapist to entrepreneur: rewriting the model
31:00 – Behind the scenes of Power Move (live coaching begins)
40:00 – Manifestor energy + working in spurts
45:00 – Incarnation cross + revealing what’s not working
52:00 – Selling, messaging, and “markets” in Human Design
57:00 – The truth about community (and what it actually means)
01:01:00 – Short-term depth vs. long-term work
01:05:00 – Final reflections + how to work together

Links & Resources:

• Learn more about Caitlan’s Power Move intensive

• Learn more about Emily’s Luxury Immersions

• Episode mentioned: Luxury Immersions (Episode 87 – Self Trust Podcast)

• Episode mentioned: Power Move (Episode 106 – Return Podcast)

• Connect with Emily Romero

• Connect with Caitlan Siegenthaler

DOES IFS BREAK YOU OR HEAL YOU?

An article in, The Cut published in October of 2025 published the article, “The Truth About IFS, the Therapy that Can Break You”

This podcast episode is my response to that article and a couple of articles published since then as an IFS therapist.

I will tell you one thing, we are definitely asking the wrong question.

Subscribe now

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Why blaming a therapy modality often misses the real issue

• The difference between a good modality and a skilled facilitator

• How harmful therapy experiences can happen even with “proven” methods and modalities

• Why IFS is being targeted right now (hint: popularity invites backlash)

• The truth about “evidence-based” therapy and why it matters (and doesn’t)

• What to actually look for when choosing a therapist

• How to stop pedestal-ing tools, frameworks, and people

So tell me, what do you think?

However, AI is here & y’all are using it so let’s make sure it is supporting your mental health and not damaging it.

I made us all a podcast episode so you can beware of the helpful things about AI and the harmful things too.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The real benefits of AI for emotional support (and why accessibility matters)

• Why AI acts as a “yes machine” and how that impacts your growth

• The critical role of co-regulation and why AI can’t provide it

• What AI misses about your body, nervous system, and unspoken cues

• The rise of AI psychosis and why it’s becoming a clinical concern

• How over-reliance on AI erodes self-trust and decision-making

• Practical guidelines for when to use AI and when to absolutely not

Listen to the podcast episode here:

PS: What makes you the most worried about using AI for your mental health? LMK in the comments

Leave a comment

The year was 2013 and I still remember how the fluorescent lights accosted my eyes as I slid into my desk on the right side of the room, near the back wall.

I can’t remember the exact name of the class — maybe Ethics of Therapy — but I remember my professor vividly.

Auburn hair swept to the side, thick glasses, maybe forty-something, and a stare that could silence every questioning part of me and summon my Good Girl parts in an instant.

We were learning about what was “ethical” to have in our offices versus what was “best practice,” and I had questions.

His voice bellowed:

“It is best practice to be a blank slate for your client. Do not have any photos of your family on your desk. Do not have anything indicating if you are married or not, what your political or religious affiliations might be.”

Basically — be a boring beige wall for your client to stare at.

Why? I immediately asked inside.

But then the staring started. I was less self-assured and in my 20s, so I swallowed it down and dreamed of my beige-wall office where I would be the best blank slate for my clients to stare at.

I thought this was what being a good therapist meant……

Graduate school taught me how to be ethical and competent. It taught me how to be a great therapist.

It did not teach me how to build a business I actually loved.

If you’re a therapist trying to run a business, chances are these resonate for you too.

Here is a list of every single thing I’ve had to unlearn from graduate school in order to LOVE my work and make it profitable, sustainable, and creative.

1. Be a Blank Slate (aka Professionalism = Neutrality)

Neutrality muted my professional voice.

The blank slate idea had me gobsmacked even when I was just a baby therapist and my only dream was to be a graduated grown-up therapist serving clients.

The blank slate — or tabula rasa — has its roots in the philosophical work of John Locke. It has its psychotherapy roots in Freud and well… he wasn’t exactly the picture of ethical therapy.

The idea makes sense as the intention is in service of the client.

Therapy should not be about the therapist.

Self-disclosure should be limited.

Avoid influencing client stories or outcomes.

Stay client-centered.

So how do you stay ethical and human?

Attuned presence is better than neutrality every time.

Go to supervision. Take care of yourself. Do your own work. That’s what helps you show up fully for your clients.

But if you run a private practice — and yes, that means you run a business — you need a perspective and a point of view.

Your humanity is what pays your bills.

My reframe: Business requires a point of view.

2. Good Helpers Don’t Care About Money

I still feel heated writing this one.

In therapy school — that’s what we’re calling it from here on out — there were endless messages about altruism and almost zero messages about running a sustainable business, P&L sheets, or equal energetic exchanges.

Helping professions are often female-dominated — which means legacy burdens around low pay and moral pressure about money.

We hear this confirmed all the time:

“You should do this because you love people, not for the money.”

I resonate with this.

I was doing some of my own money-parts work and I literally said:

“I would do this work for free, I love it so much.”

And I meant it.

Running a business costs money.

Sustaining your survival costs money.

Unless you live in the woods and grow your own food, you are a participant in capitalism.

You rarely hear people call doctors or dentists greedy.

But therapists? Somehow we’re supposed to transcend economics entirely.

My reframe: Money is what makes your work sustainable.

Money is infrastructure.

Money is capacity.

Money is what allows you to keep showing up.

3. If I’m Really Skilled, Clients Will Just Find Me

I clung to this idea like Rose on the wooden door in the freezing water — “If I’m really skilled, clients will just find me” was Jack, and I was not letting go.

In other words, friends, this one has been hard to unlearn.

Even in the corporate world I had a part that would say:

“My work should speak for itself. I don’t want to beg for promotions.”

Sometimes that worked.

But I also missed opportunities by staying silent. Waiting for my ship — money, promotions, recognition — to come in.

THE TRUTH:

The way people find therapists is constantly changing and evolving.

By staying hidden, you lose clients, money, and the opportunity to share your gifts with the people who need them.

My reframe: People need to know who you are and how you help — or they can’t work with you.

4. I Should Be Able to Help Everyone

“You need to be able to help everyone who comes into your office.”

Direct quote from my very esteemed former Johns Hopkins professor teaching Counseling Theories.

This was the class where you learn a little bit about every psychological theory under the sun:

CBT, DBT, Gestalt, Person-Centered, and on and on and on.

The message was clear:

HELP EVERYONE.

And part two of that message — at least the way my brain interpreted it — was:

“And you are a failure if you don’t.”

Imagine my surprise when it’s 2021, I’m in a coaching program for therapists, and we’re asked to pick a niche — and I panic. Red face, overthinking loop activated, talk wayyyyy too fast kind of panic.

No no no no no no no.

This wasn’t what I was taught.

And honestly, there were parts of me that truly did want to help everyone. Savior complex and all that jazz.

I struggled. I stomped my feet. I pivoted 10,000 times. I hated it.

The person teaching that program was right though.

My reframe: Specificity creates impact.

People need to understand why YOU can specifically help THEM.

That’s how real impact happens.

5. Burnout Is Part of Being a Therapist

I’m carrying blocks, play-dough, and a pile of Family Centered Therapy worksheets into a home somewhere on the outskirts of Dayton, Ohio.

This is my seventh client of the day.

I’m splitting my time between seeing kids in schools for school-based therapy and working with court-appointed families who are at risk of losing their children in the evenings.

I’m exhausted.

Bone-tired, but digging deep because the little ones in this family helped me find a third gear in my soul.

This scene could have been any post-graduate, not-yet-licensed therapist in Anywhere, USA because that is the drill.

Therapy school → take the tests → graduate → put in your time at XYZ agency where they extract every ounce of your energy → leave after your hours are done and vow never to work like that again.

I remember being in group supervision when someone said with tears in their eyes that their caseload was unsustainable.

My supervisor responded: “Everyone is dealing with this. This field may not be for you.”

The message:

Burnout is normal, so get over it.

My reframe: Being a well-rested therapist is a clinical skill and a business skill.

Well-rested you does the best work.

Your best work creates impact and allows you to keep doing this work longer.

6. If It Comes Naturally, I Didn’t Earn It

Hard Work Badge-of-Honor wearer reporting for duty. (salutes)

I’d love to blame this one on my competitive sports background and the “no pain no gain” ideology of the 90s, but therapy training added fuel to the fire.

Clinical training rewards endurance:

Apply → get in → complete the program → unpaid practicum → unpaid internship → 2,000+ clinical hours → license.

I’m not suggesting therapist training should be easier.

We deal with people’s mental health. Rigor matters.

But I did absorb the idea that everything from that point forward needed to be hard or I wasn’t doing it right.

So we recreate “hard” in our businesses because it feels familiar.

We want to earn every client. Every dollar.

We design pricing structures that look like bingo balls got thrown at a wall.

But hard doesn’t always equal growth.

Sometimes it’s just… harder.

My reframe: Business rewards discernment, not suffering.

Work smarter is not a cliché — it should literally be your motto.

Lean into what you’re naturally good at.

Otherwise what is the point of running your own business?

7. My Worth Is Measured By How Much I Give

Last but definitely not least: My worth is measured by how much I give.

Great for altruism. Terrible for boundaries and business.

If I let that client reschedule so I can give so I can be worthy → bad for business.

(And honestly, bad for that client too.)

If I price sessions at $30/hour so I can give so I can be worthy → bad for business and bad for my bank account.

There is pride in being a therapist.

But don’t let your identity get so entrenched that you sacrifice yourself at every corner.

That leads to burnout and a business that barely survives. Your business is not the place to be “needed” by clients. Be inspiring. Be a role model. Hold the space. Facilitate change. Teach them how to fish. Don’t give them the fish.

My reframe: Define worth & success on your terms & unhook it from your title as a therapist.

Yes, worthiness is your birthright & look at the parts who learned something about worthiness being connected to giving.

Therapy school taught me how to be a good therapist.

The rest — building work that feels alive, sustainable, and creative — I had to figure out on my own.

Most of what I’ve learned came from unlearning.

And I have a feeling I’m not done yet.

Want support in the quest of unlearning & creating a sustainable & creative business?

My books are now open for Power Move.

A one-week intensive for intuitive founders who feel stuck, overthink their next move, and want a business strategy rooted in who they actually are.

Book your Power Move Session Here

In this celebratory birthday episode, Caitlan marks three years of the Return podcast with a playful, behind-the-scenes conversation that feels more like a dinner party than a structured lesson. She shares what she’s loving lately, what life has been teaching her, and exciting updates unfolding inside her business and creative world. This episode is a mix of personal reflections, intuitive insights, and honest truths about following your soul’s call — even when you’ve got terrified parts.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

• Why following your intuitive “whispers” often requires courage before clarity

• How structure and freedom can coexist in your life and finances

• The difference between information and embodiment in personal growth

• Why deep work needs containers, boundaries, and intention

• What Caitlan is currently loving, reading, and experimenting with creatively

• How honoring your design can reshape the way you build your business

Chapters

• 00:00 Birthday intro + toddler serenade

• 02:00 What Caitlan’s loving lately (books, practices, inspiration)

• 08:30 The “group chat” life updates + intuitive experiences

• 12:00 Lessons life has been teaching her recently

• 16:30 Money, structure, and freedom balance

• 18:20 Backstage updates + new offer announcement

Links & Resources:

• 📚 Books mentioned

1. How to Meet and Work with Spirit Guides

2. Essentialism

3. Ancestral Medicine

• 🌄 Upcoming retreat in Colorado--stay tuned!

• 💼 New Offer: Power Move — 1-Week Human Design Intensive

Support the show

Produced by Caitlan Siegenthaler
Cover Art by Kiara Opara

If you enjoyed this episode, share it with a friend, post it to your Instagram stories, and tag me. And if you really loved it, the best thank-you is a written review on Apple Podcasts or a comment on Spotify or a subscription to Return on Substack!

That is a beautiful energetic exchange for Caitlan creating the show.