Online Platforms and Games Marketed As “Safe” For Kids Are Not Safe At All

One of the first things I wanted to push back on is the assumption that gore and other harmful content is only available on the dark web or will be blocked by content moderators. Unfortunately, there is nothing further from the truth. My son’s first exposure to gore content was on Roblox when he was seven or eight years old. YouTube and TikTok’s algorithms also served up harmful content. These are mainstream platforms parents assume are moderated, and to some degree they are. But many platforms have decreased monitoring and continue to allow harmful content because it keeps users hooked. Creators also find ways around content filters, or ease kids in with something milder before pushing them toward less-moderated spaces (this is called off platforming). I also talked about how innocuous titles and captions may appear, but the game or video has disturbing or violent content within it. “Get ready with me” videos that are actually about extreme calorie restriction, or dance videos that end in simulated domestic violence, or Roblox games that contain gore or suicide. You can’t judge what’s actually in a video by its title anymore, and unless you watch every YouTube Short that your kid sees, you won’t really know what they’re exposed to.

Parental Controls Aren’t The Solution

I’ve been a tech-skeptical parent since tablet use among toddlers became normal around 2012-2014. I had parental controls maxed out, didn’t allow social media, had “no tech” zones in my home. Not only did my kids find ways to get around all of it in, screens have been a constant source of conflict. I talked about why I think “digital wellness” and “finding balance” are the wrong frame entirely. These platforms are built to be addictive and they host harmful content. Asking parents to manage an addictive, harmful product with settings is like being told to teach your kid to smoke responsibly. My take, which may seem extreme, but so is exposing elementary age children to gore and eating disorder content: until platforms are truly safe by design, you can’t guarantee a kid’s safety online, and kids should not use these products.

What Clinicians Need To Know

This was probably the core of the conversation. My son arrived at the ER with self-harm covering nearly every inch of his torso, arms, and legs — including numbers and symbols carved into his skin. That wasn’t flagged as anything beyond general self-harm, even though the FBI had already put out a bulletin months earlier specifically describing those kinds of marks as cut signs associated with 764. I walked through the pattern of warning signs I wish someone had connected at the time: self-harm that escalates quickly, especially if it features symbols or numbers; a sudden narrowing of interests related to music, politics, friend groups, or online platforms; new “us vs. them” language; and compulsive or secretive phone use.

I also discussed the risk of waiting for a stated suicide plan before treating a situation as urgent. When my son was hospitalized, he didn’t have a specific plan for that night, and staff tried to send us home and put us on a waitlist for an intensive therapy program. But he was told them he was scared intrusive thoughts about ending his life might take over. In my advocacy work, I’ve met survivor parents whose kids were sextorted and gone within hours. Teenagers are impulsive, and using an adult model or longer planning time protocol can fail to catch a child at risk and cost lives.

What Helps Keep Kids Safe

It can feel impossible to hold onto real world experience and connection in a tech heavy world, but we must. My son healed through a full digital detox (in addition to intensive therapy, but he said within 14 days of the detox that switching to a flip phone was the most help) and is still a digital minimalist over two years later. I gave resources for parents and clinicians to help these kids reconnect to the real world and educate themselves about harms that can come from these platforms.

I hope you’ll give the episode a listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

I’ll be quiet here for the next couple of weeks as summer winds down and I focus on spending time with my kids. My son’s last summer as a kid is almost over! My eyes well up every time I say that. I’ll still be writing and will hopefully have some awesome posts for you all when I return.

Intensive Treatment Was Needed But Refused
I could hardly imagine things getting worse, but over the next six weeks, it did. Shortly before the trip, he announced he was dropping out of therapy. He said it wasn’t helping him at all, and he didn’t even know what to talk about. His therapist and I convinced him to stick with it. By this time, she and I were checking in several times a month. In early January, a few days after we arrived back in Colorado from our winter trip, I told her his mood, behavior, self-harm, and comments with politically extreme undertones were absolutely alarming. I told her I was losing him, that I was watching him commit suicide in slow motion. I felt more intensive therapy or treatment was needed - not later, now.

Since he insisted he had no plans to end his life or a desire to do so, I was dismissed once again. You cannot admit a child who doesn’t have a suicide plan.

The Therapist Suggested Online Groups as a Solution
My son let it slip that his therapist suggested he might find like-minded people in online groups. This could be a solution to his social struggles. I’d been more than clear with both of them that I was concerned about his online activity. I was furious. Of course, I didn’t get it — this is how teens have social interactions now. Another family member warned me I should be careful about depriving him or controlling his online activity. He could rebel further.

I sounded multiple alarm bells from mid-January through the first week of February. The self-harm was BAD. He was making vague references to self-harming or even committing suicide on stage (as part of a musical performance, he was creating a solo album at this time), and saying life wasn’t worth living anymore. He directly asked about over-the-counter drugs that could either get someone high or cause an overdose. I had every medication and sharp locked up (his father claimed he did too), so I couldn’t understand how he was self-harming so severely. Each time, she agreed to talk to him about it, and each time, he would say he had no plan for suicide. Round and round we went.

February: The Month I Stopped Sleeping
I barely slept that month, trying to stay awake in case I heard my son harming himself or worse. Several times, he took his phone off the family charging station in the hall & I bolted out of bed, intercepting him and retrieving it. Countless other times, I had finally fallen asleep for an hour or two and missed that he was sneaking his phone at night.

On Saturday, February 10th, my ex-husband called me, saying he had urgent concerns about our son. It was John’s (not his real name) weekend to have the children, but we had split parent taxi duty for the morning. Our daughter was in the car with me, and I asked if we should discuss when I could get off speakerphone. They both piped up at once, saying she already knew what had happened. She said she was worried about her brother, and she begged us to help him before it was too late. John jumped back in, describing a rage-filled, conspiracy theory-laden diatribe that my son launched into shortly after waking up that morning.

“I think he’s been red pilled,” he said.

Finally, someone else could see what I'd been watching happen for months. But we were almost out of time to save him.

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It’s time to head to D.C. again. This time, it’s to support survivor families for Social Media Victims Remembrance Day and a day of action on the Hill with fellow Chapter Leaders of Mothers Against Media Addiction (MAMA).

Social Media Victims Remembrance Day

In 2024, Senators Marsha Blackburn (R-TN) and Amy Klobuchar (D-MN) introduced a bipartisan resolution recognizing what’s now known as Social Media Victims Remembrance Day (SMVRD). The surviving families of Carson Bride, Alexander Neville, and Devin Norring founded the event. Carson (forever 16) was cyberbullied by classmates on Snapchat and took his own life. Alexander (forever 14) and Devin (forever 19) were given fake pills containing lethal amounts of fentanyl by Snapchat drug dealers. Carson and Alexander both passed on June 23rd.

MAMA members arrived at Upper Senate Park early in the morning to set up the vigil. While putting together 287 signs with the names, photos, and ages of each victim, many of us broke down in tears, myself included. It was pouring rain, so when every chair, sign, and candle was staged 2 hours later, we were soaked.

Senators Richard Blumenthal (D-CT), Amy Klobuchar, and Josh Hawley (R-MO) spoke at the event, as well as survivor parents and movement allies. There was a candlelight vigil as dusk fell over the Capitol. More teenagers and young adults joined the movement this year, giving voice to the effects of online harms ranging from sextortion to developing eating disorders, to suicide and self-harm content.

Carrying this much emotion in one evening is a lot, but every vigil, direct action event, hearing, or legislator meeting I take part in reminds me of the community created by this movement, and how that community strengthens us. Whether our children survived or were lost, sharing our story dozens of times in one day isn’t easy. Shoving down nerves to meet with lawmakers isn’t easy. Maintaining composure while those lawmakers speak of compromise isn’t easy. The community is what keeps us going — real, face to face community.

KOSA vs. the KIDS Act: The Bill to Protect Kids, and the One Trying to Replace It

The following morning, 13 State Chapter Leaders and MAMA team members headed to the Capitol for a day of action. Our message was clear — the current Senate version of KOSA must pass this year. The KIDS Act is a great deal for companies like Meta, and a terrible deal for American families.

The Kids Online Safety Act (KOSA) was introduced by Senators Richard Blumenthal and Marsha Blackburn in 2022. It passed on July 30, 2024 by a vote of 91-3. KOSA requires tech companies to abide by a “duty of care,” meaning they would have to take steps to protect children from harmful online encounters, such as bullying or predation, or promotion of eating disorders or self-harm. Addictive design features would be prohibited for children. Platforms must be safe by design for children.

The House is now pushing a bill called the KIDS Act. The duty of care has been removed. A bipartisan group of 44 attorneys general have opposed the bill. Online safety advocacy groups such as Parents RISE!, Parents Together, and MAMA have spoken out against the bill. The KIDS Act claims it requires product safety, but allows tech companies to escape liability.

Tech Times sums it up: the House bill swaps out a “legally enforceable duty of care” for annual audits — paperwork that tells the public what a platform is doing, but gives a harmed child or parent no legal claim against a platform that knew about the harm and did nothing.

This is the equivalent of a car seat manufacturer reporting annually how many children are harmed or killed by defective car seats, but prohibits parents from suing that manufacturer.

It’s another bill dressed up as child safety legislation that actually protects Big Tech from accountability. And it places responsibility fully back on parents, expecting them to research annual safety audits instead of assuring them that games and platforms promoted as safe for children are, in fact, safe for children. Parental responsibility matters, but no parent can fully protect children against algorithms designed to be addictive and that promote harmful content. Big Tech knows this and has spent accordingly: $226,000 a day lobbying Congress in Q1 2026 alone to protect profits over the health and safety of our children.

Reuters reported on June 19 that Meta is pushing to weaken KOSA — proposing language that would grant platforms immunity from lawsuits or liability claims, in exchange for dropping its opposition to the bill.

MAMA Chapter Leaders and team members visited every Senate office in less than 24 hours. Every staffer, aide, and Senator we met with expressed support — but nearly all of them indicated that getting the bill done this year would be hard. After four years of fighting for this, that’s a frustrating thing to hear. I just hope the power of concerned citizens can outweigh the massive amount of money being dumped on Washington by tech lobbyists. If not, then it’s clear every member of Congress that votes against child safety and capitulates to Big Tech is bought & paid for by the most loathed companies in the world.

This is not only a bipartisan issue in Congress, it’s one the American people agree on, whether they’re a Democrat, Republican, or Independent. Parents are increasingly delaying smartphones. Internal documents released during the LA and New Mexico social media trials clearly showed these platforms have prioritized profits over the mental health and safety of children. A growing number teachers and school districts are questioning their Ed Tech policies, going back to pencils, paper, and books. The public has swung 49 points against data centers in just nine months.

My family knows all too well the damage caused by unregulated tech platforms and lawmakers who are taking too long to act — that’s why I wake up at 4:00 a.m. to fly across the country. I nearly lost my son to social media harm. My daughter has been hurt by content promoting eating disorders, domestic violence, and self-harm. I had the highest level of parental controls set and it didn’t matter. No parent should be expected to solely protect their children from platforms built to be addictive, but until Congress acts, this is our reality.

It’s time for Congress to act. It’s time for Congress to choose. Are they going to stand with American families, or are they with Big Tech?

Tell your Senators to support a strong duty of care that requires technology companies to make their products safe by design, reject any provisions that block states from enacting stronger AI protections, and oppose liability shields that let Big Tech avoid accountability for harms to children.

This takes 1 minute! No trip to D.C. required!

TAKE ACTION → Send a message to your Senators right now!

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The tip jar goes straight toward funding trips like this one ⬇️

Tip Jar

I’m announcing a brand new addition to my Substack publication: Slow Tech Revolution subscriber chat.

This is a conversation space exclusively for paid subscribers—kind of like a group chat or live hangout. I’ll post questions and updates that come my way, and you can jump into the discussion.

I’d love to hear your suggestions for chat topics! Feel free to respond to this email or start your own.

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The Warning Signs No One Else Could See

By December, as winter rolled into Denver, my son’s cries for help were no longer direct pleas, but warning signs flashing nonstop. He’d given up on anyone understanding him or helping him. Convinced he was an outcast, completely unlovable, and a disappointing shame to everyone, hope faded into acceptance. Not only was he beyond repair, but the rest of the world was too. He decided he would desensitize himself to the threat of violence and to the harsh world around him. If he became evil like the content he was addicted to (and I still didn’t know about), he could protect himself and maybe find belonging. Nihilistic Violent Extremism propaganda had all but fully brainwashed him.

I felt like a helpless bystander, watching my son commit suicide in slow motion. Every time I knocked on his bedroom door, panic set in if more than 10 seconds passed before he answered. What will I find when I open the door? What if this time he’s gone? Will today be his last on Earth? Why isn’t anyone taking this seriously? Why can’t I fix this? What did I do that caused him to pull away from me and every value I’ve tried to pass down? How can no one else be seeing this? Am I crazy? Am I overreacting? I must be since no one else can see it, but my gut tells me I’m not. I have to keep fighting for my son; I can’t give up on him. But I don’t know what else to do.

Every few weeks, I discovered more self-harm, and every time the cuts were deeper and larger than the last. He stopped sharing about the cutting and his emotional state, shutting me out, insisting he was “fine!” whenever I attempted to connect with him. As he fell further down the online rabbit hole, every protective factor broke until his own family became the enemy. We didn’t understand him and didn’t care about him. Nothing would convince him otherwise. Nothing mattered. Nothing would ever get any better. He didn’t care. He was numb.

When Providers Dismiss a Parent's Concerns

I kept trying to get his providers to see how awful this was. Give his meds more time to kick in, they said. He says it’s not that bad, and he doesn’t have a plan to commit suicide, so it will get better eventually. It’s normal for kids to be always online and socially isolated now. Unrelenting depression and self-harm are also pretty normal. The odd political comments? Boys are inundated with misogynist content and right-wing conspiracies. It’s all standard for adolescents in the algorithm age.

The more I was dismissed, the closer I came to losing hope, too. My son was going to die, and there was nothing I could do to stop it, despite all my efforts. I was the mother trying to lift the car off her baby, but I lacked the strength to hold it high enough.

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I Thought Roblox Was Safe. I Had No Idea.

Up until 2 days ago, I thought my son’s exposure to violence on Roblox consisted of a single incident where he and a friend played a first-person shooter game at a sleepover. The other boy was frightened, couldn’t sleep, and shared what happened with his mother the following morning. I asked him about it in a calm, quiet manner later that day. He wouldn’t really talk about it, but felt remorseful and said he didn’t realize how scary the game was until it was too late. I thanked him for being honest and let him know it couldn’t happen again. That was the last time my son played Roblox.

I’ve always been a tech skeptic, prioritizing real-world connection and activities, but my kids have not had an entirely screen-free childhood. Especially during the COVID-29 pandemic, when this incident happened. Lockdowns were somewhat lifted, but the kids were still doing online school, and activities were restricted. They were on screens way more than I cared for — just like every other parent during that time. Roblox was a fun way for them to “play” with their friends when they couldn’t meet in person. It gave me an hour to make dinner or work without hearing “MOM!” 9798576697 times.

I thought Roblox was a safe game for kids. That’s supposed to be the whole point, right? Literally every kid plays this game all day, every day. I set the parental controls and direct messaging settings for maximum safety, reminded the kids regularly not to friend or DM anyone unless they were 100% certain it was someone they knew in real life (as in, you’ve confirmed via phone call it’s legit), checked in regularly about who they were connected with and what types of games they were playing.

Little did I know that Roblox is a cesspool of child sexual predation and 764 recruitment, or that my son’s first exposure to gore and suicide content would happen on Roblox at age seven.

150+ Lawsuits, 8 State AGs, and $35 Million (so far!) in Settlements

Roblox has been under fire for child safety problems since at least 2019, and is facing over 150 federal lawsuits and about 20 more in California State Court. At least eight state attorneys general have also filed suits. Thus far, Roblox has settled with three states for a combined 35.8 million¹.

Roblox wants the federal child sex abuse cases moved out of court and into arbitration². They say their terms of use require that claims be settled in closed-door arbitration, and that users have forfeited the right to have their cases heard in open court.

A mother named Myra, who’s suing Roblox after her daughter was victimized by an Australian man on the platform (the FBI intercepted the predator from meeting her daughter in person), said the following (D'Anastasio, 2026, para. 6):

“They just want to put everything behind the scenes. They don’t want everybody to know what actually is going on.”

Roblox admitted in its 2021 SEC filing³ that it was “unable to prevent” inappropriate interactions with minors, and again stated this in subsequent filings every year after. Roblox simultaneously launched multiple PR campaigns claiming it was a safe virtual playground for children and said “safety is in our DNA” on its website. So parents like me are supposed to know these platforms are full of it and become experts at tracking down and reading SEC filings? Another reason the “parental responsibility” argument is ridiculous.

A report by Hindenburg Research, released in October 2024, called Roblox a “pedophile hellscape for kids” and accused the company of “inflating key metrics for Wall Street”. According to the report, Roblox compromised child safety to show growth to investors. Safety features were shelved if they hurt user engagement. Moderators were outsourced at poverty wages, with only 0.77 moderators per 100,000 users⁴.

Roblox expanded parental controls and safety measures in 2024. This seems to be little more than a PR campaign, as trust and safety costs dropped 8% that year⁵. It launched its Safety Snapshot campaign in October 2025.

A wave of lawsuits was filed in 2025, including by the Louisiana AG (August 2025), which called Roblox’s safety changes “too little, too late, and woefully inadequate.⁶”

The CEO Who Wants to Add Dating to a Children's Game

At the 2023 Roblox Developer Conference, CEO David Baszucki announced “dating experiences”, specifically for users verified to be 17+, using experiences rated for ages 17+⁷. This was not the first or last time Baszucki has discussed adult dating experiences as an important Roblox feature. Why adult dating is built into a platform mainly used by children is beyond me. 40% of users are under the age of 12⁸. The last time I checked, “adult” means 18+, not 17+. So Baszuki thinks facilitating middle-aged adults forming real-life relationships with 17-year-olds is a good thing?

On the TechStuff podcast (July 9, 2025), Baszucki changed his mind about the minimum age for Roblox dating — it would be 21+. He said Roblox was more than a gaming site. It was a “wellness platform” and could help solve the loneliness epidemic. It could also help young people find connection⁹.

Let’s let Baszucki speak for himself¹⁰:

“Young people who have gotten disconnected at school, young people who are going through a mental health crisis, young people who are going through something. Finding people on Roblox to connect with... I mean it sounds gratuitous for me to say it but parents say ‘my kid is alive because they found people on Roblox.”

This literally describes a breeding ground for isolated kids to connect with extremists and predators. But do go on…

“So I think there’s a loneliness epidemic going on in the world, I think I’ll go out on a limb and I’ll say for, in quotes, ‘21 and up, ID verified, opted-in [users]’ some day we’ll have dating on Roblox and I think a lot of people who might be afraid to go on a real-life date might find it easier to have a virtual date to start and then, if they connect, move to the physical world. A wellness platform... I think of as a platform to help loneliness and bring connection.”

My brain just broke AGAIN because of the audacity of another Tech Bro. But I’ll keep going.

Roblox: 764’s Hunting Ground

764 and other extremist groups use 764 as a hunting ground¹¹. Dozens of incidents have been highlighted in the press and lawsuits against the company, including a 16-year-old in CT who was sucked into 764 on Roblox¹². The FBI, NCMEC¹³, and the Institute for Strategic Dialogue¹⁴ say that Roblox is a prominent platform for 764 recruitment.

Recognition of the link between the gore to extremism pipeline is gaining ground. I spoke about it recently on David Riedman’s podcast, recounting that my son’s first exposure to violence was on Roblox. What I didn’t know two weeks ago was that it was actually his first exposure to full-blown gore, and that exposure went on longer than I realized.

My Son Was Seven the First Time Roblox Showed Him Gore

Two days ago, my son & I met with a member of a documentary team about his experience with Roblox. Before that morning, I had no idea how bad it was.

I knew of the incident recounted at the start of this post, and he’s been more open with me about his experiences online while on his recovery journey from NVE. But he describes “blocking out” much of it due to trauma. Memories trickle out over time. It will take him years to fully recover, but thankfully, he’s doing well now. He wants the story out there so other kids don’t go through what he did, but these conversations are difficult to say the least. I hold him back from talking about it more often than he thinks is necessary, as I see the toll it takes.

A few hours before our meeting, he shared this with me:

Warning: Audio clip contains explicit content. Text transcription is below.

Him: I remember there’s one game where it used a game mechanic to drag you toward a button in the center, and if you got dragged toward the button, it would show you a real-life gore image.

Me: If you got dragged toward the button — as in somebody else dragged you, or you dragged yourself? What do you mean by “game mechanic?”

Him: The developer programs something in there to drag you toward the button, like an unseen force of gravity or whatever.

Me: So you don’t have any control over it?

Him: No, it forces you to see it, and you’re close enough that even if you turn off the game, you’ll still see it.

Me: How old were you when you played that game?

Him: Seven. Or eight.

Me: That’s crazy how early you were exposed to that stuff — I didn’t even know about it.

Him: Mm-hmm.

Me: That’s really upsetting.

Him: Mm-hmm.

Me: Why didn’t you tell me about it?

Him: I don’t know. Because I wasn’t really allowed to see stuff like that when I was a kid, so I figured — you know — I really wasn’t allowed to play the violent games. So that was kind of my way to rebel.

He described that violence and gore in games could be directly disclosed in game descriptions or hidden within games that appeared harmless. Curiosity about first-person shooter games exposed him to graphic violence, gore, and suicidal imagery way beyond the norm for this style of game. Eventually, he learned how to search keywords like torture or gore or shooter, and how to phrase these searches to get the results he wanted (it’s not hard at all) instead of safe games.

Him: I remember there’s this other one where you’re supposed to like, where the whole object of the game is to just dismember yourself… There’s like various like things that you can use to dismember, kill yourself in various fashions, uh, but it’s all like extremely like, exaggerated blood and shit, but it’s all very, very realistic.

Standard Online Safety Advice Falls Short

This is the problem with the standard “talk to your kids about what they’re doing online” advice. Schlep, who speaks out about Roblox safety issues, said in an Inside 764 podcast¹⁵:

“I didn’t even realize I was being taken advantage of. I didn’t even know what a predator or a pedophile was. But this person was asking me and showing me horrible, horrific stuff.”

Kids don’t realize how bad this content is. They don’t know how much it can affect their mental health and development. Kids make mistakes. Kids rebel. Kids sneak around and break rules. Kids learn how to bypass parental controls that don’t work well to begin with. They don’t realize they’re being programmatically desensitized to violence, gore, sexual abuse, and suicide. Predators and gore content creators lean heavily on shame and breaking protective factors so children won’t speak up and ask for help.

Yet the tech companies want to put full responsibility on the parents, and safety experts crow about how talking to your kids about their online activity, as if they’ll magically spill the beans about what they’ve been up to.

One thing that spared my son a worse outcome was that he blocked any friend requests or DM’s. He knew from my lectures about online safety not to accept requests unless he was certain it was a connection that he also knew in real life. Thank goodness he followed that rule, or the outcome could have been way worse, and at a much younger age.

Our family is not the only one who has experienced this. Roblox has a well documented problem with games that depict violence, gore, and mass shootings¹⁶. Yet they continue to treat safety as a PR problem, so parents think the platform is harmless, or that it can’t happen to their kid.

So What Should Parents Do?

Get your kids off Roblox. Today. As in right now. Share this post with other parents so they know the truth about Roblox.

Do not give this shitshow train wreck of a company your attention, money, “growth metric”, or anything else. Certainly, don’t let your children on a platform deemed a playground for pedophiles.

I know that’s easier said than done. My son played Roblox to stay in touch with a friend during the pandemic. Everyone is on it, so… everyone is on it. That’s the problem.

But it’s one that we can solve. These companies are not fixing the safety issues fast enough. Congress is not acting fast enough. It’s up to us. We can show we mean business by not using platforms like this. Maybe then, Roblox will make its platform truly safe.

I’m not holding my breath.

In the meantime, send your kids outside. Send them to the park (yes, with their friends, maybe you don’t go with them, depending on the age). Make your home the “party house” for kids. Host a screen-free sleepover. Teach them how to cook a meal or mow the lawn.

Anything besides Roblox.

Are you concerned about safety if your kids are at the park or riding bikes around the neighborhood? Talk to them about predators, traffic, and wearing a helmet, just like you do about staying safe online. Tag along & read a book, or invite the other parent to join you if you can’t let them out unsupervised. In my experience and opinion, kids pick up on creepiness quicker in person than they do online anyway.

The man in the white van isn’t at the park anyway. He’s on Roblox.

Has your kid experienced something scary or harmful on Roblox? I’d love to hear about it.

Leave a comment

References

1. D’Anastasio, C. (2026, April 21). Roblox settles with states for $35.8 million over child safety. Bloomberg. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2026-04-21/roblox-settles-with-states-for-35-8-million-over-child-safety

2. D’Anastasio, C. (2026, June 10). Roblox wants deluge of child sex abuse cases moved out of court. Bloomberg. https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2026-06-10/roblox-wants-deluge-of-child-sex-abuse-cases-moved-out-of-court

3. Roblox Corporation. (2022, February 25). Annual report (Form 10-K) for fiscal year ending December 31, 2021. U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgar/data/0001315098/000131509822000058/rblx-20211231.htm Note: The same language appears in subsequent annual and quarterly filings through at least Q2 2024.

4. Hindenburg Research. (2024, October 8). Roblox: Inflated key metrics for Wall Street and a pedophile hellscape for kids. https://hindenburgresearch.com/roblox/

5. Roblox Corporation. (2024, August 8). Quarterly report (Form 10-Q) for quarter ending June 30, 2024. U.S. Securities and Exchange Commission. https://www.sec.gov/Archives/edgar/data/0001315098/000131509824000166/rblx-20240630.htm

6. Stelloh, T. (2025, August 14). Louisiana attorney general sues Roblox, calling the platform ‘the perfect place for pedophiles.’ NBC News. https://www.nbcnews.com/tech/tech-news/louisiana-attorney-general-sues-roblox-calling-platform-perfect-place-rcna225144

7. Sportskeeda. (2023, September). RDC 2023 keynote: Roblox to feature dating experiences. Sportskeeda. https://www.sportskeeda.com/roblox-news/news-rdc-2023-keynote-roblox-feature-dating-experiences

8. Statista. (2024). Distribution of Roblox users worldwide, by age group. Statista. https://www.statista.com/statistics/1190869/roblox-games-users-global-distribution-age/

9. Baszucki, D. (2025, July 9). TechStuff [Podcast episode].

10. Connor, J. (2025, July 29). Roblox CEO wants to add an in-game dating feature, despite 40% of players being under 13yrs old. TweakTown. https://www.tweaktown.com/news/106712/roblox-ceo-wants-to-add-an-in-game-dating-feature-despite-40-of-players-being-under-13yrs-old/index.htm

11. Global Project Against Hate and Extremism. (2025, October 3). Online neo-Nazi group using children's video games for recruiting and propaganda. Global Project Against Hate and Extremism. https://globalextremism.org/post/online-neo-nazi-group-using-childrens-video-games/

12. Associated Press. (2025, May 6). FBI has opened 250 investigations tied to violent online network ‘764’ that preys on teens, top official says. ABC News. https://abcnews.com/US/fbi-opened-250-investigations-tied-violent-online-network/story?id=121480884

13. National Center for Missing & Exploited Children. (2025). Using sextortion to groom kids for violence, pain. https://www.missingkids.org/blog/2025/using-sextortion-to-groom-kids-for-violence-pain

14. Institute for Strategic Dialogue. (2025, March 27). 764 [Explainer]. https://www.isdglobal.org/isd-explainer/764/

15. Inside 764. (2026, March 6). Episode 9: Schlep, Roblox and 764 - The parenting crisis nobody’s talking about [Audio podcast episode]. Inside 764. https://www.inside764.com/episodes/ep-9-schlep-roblox-and-764-the-parenting-crisis-nobodys-talking-about

    Note: I have also been interviewed for the Inside 764 podcast: (2026, March 20). Episode 10: From screen time to extremism: How one family fought back [Audio podcast episode]. Inside 764. https://www.inside764.com/episodes/ep-10-from-screen-time-to-extremism-how-one-family-fought-back

16. Anti-Defamation League. (2025, April). The dark side of Roblox: 'Active shooter studios' create maps based on real-life mass shootings. ADL. https://www.adl.org/resources/article/dark-side-roblox-active-shooter-studios-create-maps-based-real-life-mass

About a dozen concert-goers stood against the back wall of the narrow concert venue. Nearly all of them had their heads down, eyes glued to their screen.

Was it the kids?

No, it was the adults.

Why Gen Z Doesn't Dance at Concerts Anymore

Social media is heavy on ‘90s nostalgia, including videos showing the difference in energy between ‘90s concerts versus now. Everyone holding their phone aloft, viewing the musicians through the glowing rectangle, juxtaposed against the swelling raw energy of thousands of people jumping in unison. It’s a gut punch.

Tsk, tsk, say the adults. The kids are glued to their screens! They can’t even peel their eyes away to enjoy their favorite band - and they paid hundreds for terrible seats!

Yes, Gen Z is online a lot. But that is changing quickly as they’re figuring out their attention, mental health, social lives, and sleep have been robbed by Big Tech. It’s time for us to do the same.

If Millennials and Gen X want the kids to get off their phones, they need to set an example.

Three bands (all teens) played for an hour each. After the concert, my son mentioned the row of parents on their phones during the performances. He found it disrespectful and frustrating, and wondered how Boomers (yes, I corrected him that we’re Gen X, dammit!) expect kids to put down their tech when they’re being hypocritical.

I suggested that parents want to preserve the memory of their child’s performance. I certainly do, & took a handful of videos and photos. He agreed, but said that’s different than scrolling. It was obvious that a lot of the phone use wasn’t capturing the moment. They were scrolling or checking email. He compared this to the teens in the crowd, who were fully engaged with the present moment.

I saw a teenager use her phone for less than three minutes. Another boy had a vintage camcorder and filmed a few songs (these have made a comeback - I see one at almost every show my son plays). Other than that, the kids enjoyed the show without distraction. But one thing I did notice was that very few of them danced. If they did, they didn’t keep it up for long and were obviously holding back. You’ve probably heard that today’s teens and young adults don’t dance freely at concerts because they’re under constant surveillance. Everyone is filming, and if their peers aren’t, there are AI-powered security cameras. Who wants their uninhibited dance moves recorded and possibly posted on social media? All of us “olds“ joke about how we’re grateful our teen years weren’t captured on film. But we’re doing that to Gen Z right now.

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Do We Have to Capture Every Moment? Probably Not.

I’m guilty of it too. I want to capture every moment of every performance my children have. I don’t post any photos or videos of them on social media (I’m rarely on myself), but our family is all across the country, so I want to keep them in the loop. I’m proud of my children’s accomplishments. Who wouldn’t feel the need to record the entire thing?

What I’ve come to realize is that I won’t fully enjoy or remember it if I watch the entire thing through the screen while filming. It’s distracting and takes me away from fully engaging on an emotional and physical level. Even if I set the phone up on a tripod and try to ignore it, it still affects my attention.

I’ve come to a middle ground now. I take a few photos and videos, and then put the phone away. Your kid doesn’t care if you filmed every second. They care if you were truly paying attention to them. What are we teaching them if we’re always filming and possibly posting on social media anyway?

Smartphones Are Designed to Be Addictive for Everyone

Parents are rightfully concerned about their kids’ digital habits and social media harm, but we need to take a look at our own tech habits. Believe me, I’ve had to do it too - I’m not pointing the finger without pointing it directly at myself. I remember the first (of many) times one of my kids asked why I was on my phone all the time. I didn’t have a good answer, or if I did, it was more of an excuse than a legitimate reason.

I’ve had that uncomfortable recognition while standing in the kitchen, scrolling or checking email for the 200th time that day, while trying to cook dinner. Checking a text (or trying desperately to ignore the notification) when I should be listening to the child standing right in front of me, trying to tell me about a very important part of their day. I wonder why I’m checking email 200 times a day anyway. Most of its ads that I’ve tried to unsubscribe from multiple times, and everyone can wait a few hours (or even 24!) for me to answer.

I remember when I was a teenager, and my parents caught me smoking. They rightfully grounded me, but I remember how angry I was at the hypocrisy of them lecturing me about the dangers of smoking while there was a pack of cigarettes on the table right next to them.

This isn’t all our fault. Literally everything is on our phones now, and we’re expected to be available to everyone at a moment’s notice, even if it’s work-related after hours. It’s not just social media that’s designed to be addictive. It’s the smartphones themselves. I took every social media platform app off my phone and still found myself picking it up 100 or more times a day. I then deleted every app that could be distracting, and found myself checking the weather app over and over again. It’s ridiculous.

The culture has shifted towards constant connection and distraction via smartphones. It’s time for us to shift it back towards intentional tech use. Change starts with us, and we have to be role models for healthy tech habits for our children’s sake.

What are you doing to help yourself or your family with digital wellness? I’d love to hear about it!

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The Boy He Was Before Everything Changed

At the age of 2, my son became obsessed with music. A drum kit, deconstructed and placed on the floor, was the first instrument he played. I distinctly remember his eyes lighting up with recognition and awe. Within weeks, the drum kit moved to his room, where a stage started to take shape. A toy Dyson vacuum cleaner doubled as a microphone stand. He imitated screeching solos on a plastic Elmo guitar. I offered to buy a ukulele or toddler-size guitar. He insisted pretending was better because he could mimic the noises of shredding guitar solos before his skill set caught up (yes, he literally said that).

At age 3, he had his first performance at his Montesorri school’s Fall Festival. Afterwards, several teachers and staff pulled me aside. They asked if I was prepared for him to be a rockstar when he grew up, because it was obvious to everyone that it was his destiny.

At age 5, we learned that my son is autistic. His deeply feeling, tender heart gave him insight into feeling left out, so he took care of anybody who might feel the same way. If one of his classmates looked lonely, my son would introduce himself, try to make them feel more comfortable, and encourage them to join.

My son’s autism, creativity, and intelligence made school challenging. Struggling to mask reactions to sensory overstimulation drained him, often resulting in a full-blown meltdown by the end of the school day. He was frustrated by teachers who told him he couldn’t learn to write in cursive because it was too early or because of his dysgraphia, or that he couldn’t study topics of interest because they were too advanced. One teacher refused to follow his 504 plan and opined that she didn’t believe in most diagnoses since it was most likely a parenting problem. After multiple conversations with her and the administrative staff that led nowhere, I homeschooled him for a few of his elementary years, during which I let him self-direct his history and literature education because he was fascinated by topics I never would’ve thought to bring up at his age. He knocked out nearly the entire middle school (and some of high school) curriculum by fifth grade.

My son was also fascinated by animals. He watched Wild Kratts daily, pausing the show every 5-10 minutes to breathlessly tell me all the facts he’d learned. Between Wild Kratts, trips to the zoo, and studying every book about animals he could get his hands on, he memorized hundreds, possibly thousands, of animal facts. When asked to name his favorite animal, he replied: “I don’t have a favorite because they’re all so amazing, and we have to care for all of them, and make sure we keep the Earth a good place for them to live.”

Eventually, he outgrew Wild Kratts, but never stopped caring for animals or the environment. He remained passionate about music and performing, joining the performance program at our local School of Rock as a drummer and vocalist. He taught himself guitar and keyboard, as well as audio engineering and production, composing and recording songs. He dreamed of forming a garage band with his peers.

At age 14, my son’s deep empathy, sensitivity, and loyalty made him vulnerable to one of the most dangerous online threats in existence. His love of animals and music was weaponized against him in an attempt to coerce him into self-harm, suicide, and possibly violence. I didn’t know until months later, but between his fear of being shot at school, hopelessness from attempts at real world connection ending in pain and humiliation, and exposure to violent content online, he was spiraling into the darkest corners of the internet. Violence turned into gore content and quickly fed into Nihilistic Violent Extremist groups like 764, accounts that glorified self-harm and suicide.

Within a matter of weeks, he was hooked. Within 2 months, I barely recognized him.

Why I Need You to Know Who He Was First

If I haven’t lost you (damn digital age attention spans), you’re probably wondering why I just spent just over 600 words describing my son B.E. (Before Extremism).

Because it can happen to your kid too.

There’s a lot of stigma & misconceptions about how white, young males fall into extremism and mental health collapse. There’s even more stigma attached to autistic boys - they’re already loners, socially inept, unfeeling, and uncaring. There’s a knee-jerk reaction of parents thinking it can’t happen to their kid because they follow expert recommendations for online safety, and they’re liberal/conservative/Jewish/Catholic/Christian/Whatever.

I’m guilty of believing misconceptions of boys falling into extremism. I’m guilty of thinking “not my kid.” I raised him to know and do better. I followed all the expert advice about keeping my kids safe online - everything from parental controls to discussions with my kids.

I didn’t understand how algorithms and coercion and hopeless isolation can render all that moot. I didn’t know about romanticizers vs perpetrators . I didn’t know that my son’s autism made him more vulnerable to coercion by these groups and the content itself, although I knew damn well autism did not make him an unemphatic loner. I didn’t know that YouTube’s algorithm is just as harmful as other social media platforms, even though it’s marketed as an educational entertainment platform and packaged with EdTech devices. I didn’t know that no one needs to DM your child for them to suffer harm online, or that gore content is widely available on mainstream platforms.

I was wrong, and so were many of the professionals who should have recognized the warning signs when I first reported them. They definitely should have by the time I was begging for help, and my son was nearly gone.

I spent 600+ words describing who my son was B.E, and I’m telling our story in detail because neither of us wants another family to go through what we did. I want people to understand how your child can do 180 degree turn, changing into someone you don’t recognize and could lose in the blink of an eye. I want people to understand my son as a child who was in pain, not a caricature of just another white male extremist or extremely online teen.

The first post in this series discusses initial warning signs that his mental health team and I missed or rationalized as normal teenage behavior. All of this worsened, and additional signs were apparent from the beginning of his freshman year through winter, as described below.

Sudden Changes in Behavior and Appearance

As summer gave way to fall, my tender-hearted, mature, optimistic child transformed into someone unrecognizable. He dyed his hair black, went against my rules and wore corpse paint to school daily, along with black metal band t-shirts depicting violent imagery. Metal prongs and animal skulls (sometimes real, sometimes replicas) were affixed to his jacket and pants. A permanent scowl darkened his face. Sullen irritability peppered with angry outbursts replaced laughter and hopefulness. I watched the love and light drain from his eyes, replaced by a glare or appearing hypnotized.

My son rarely showed anger; instead he internalized his emotions in an attempt to be polite and people-please, even if it increased his distress. Now, he was verbally and even sometimes physically aggressive, and talked about loved ones in dehumanizing, derogatory terms. My son was always a rule follower and usually accepted the reasoning and logic behind household and school rules when he questioned them. Now, every rule was fuel to the fire - another shouting match, another consequence for breaking them, particularly when it came to screen use (see below).

This wasn’t normal teenage rebellion. This was a total personality shift.

Increase in Mental Health Symptoms, Especially New or Worsening Self-Harm

My son was too sensitive and cared about people too much to commit an act of violence against anybody else. But he internalized his loneliness and depression, and his self-harm intensified. For the first few months, he was truthful about his self-harm and asked for support. By October, he was rarely forthcoming, but would usually admit to an incident when I asked about unexplained cuts. We both asked for additional treatment and support from his mental health providers during this time, but were dismissed. The only solution offered was an increase in medication, which didn’t help. He grew more hopeless each session.

By December, he had deep slashes all over his thighs, front and back of his torso, and arms. By January, he had carved satanic symbols, anarchy symbols, and other stylistic numerical cut signs into his body. Some have left permanent scars. I later learned ritualistic self-harm in the form of symbols, numbers, or with a promise of healing injustice (such as my son’s concerns about animals & the environment) is promoted by 764, o9A, and NVE websites and accounts on mainstream social media platforms. I didn’t know about the symbols or extent of his self-harm until he was hospitalized because he covered up the worst of it. More on that in Part 3.

Social Isolation and Withdrawal From Family

As he entered his freshman year, my son had lost most of his friend group, but had a dim light of hope left. He signed up for band class and drum line. Certain he would meet like-minded teens in these classes, he was optimistic his dream of forming a band would become a reality. Instead, the social dynamics pushed him over the edge.

The inability of Gen Z to peel their eyes off a screen and connect in real life, combined with his increasingly depressed demeanor and darkening worldview, turned into a vicious cycle of social isolation.

As an autistic, sensitive kid, my son experienced his fair share of bullying, including anti-Semitism, in elementary and middle school. High school bullying was a whole different level of trauma - both in intensity and frequency.

Groups of teens followed him in the halls and at lunch, barking at him and hurling insults. Sometimes they yelled that he should just kill himself. Classmates posted videos of him on Snapchat with captions like “retard” and “next school shooter”. He tried to escape by eating lunch on the field at the end of campus, but the bullying continued during class. Each day, he shared how angry, lonely, depressed, and hopeless he was, and how this mistreatment was compounding these feelings. I offered to stay out of it if he had a handle on it and jump in if he needed support. He insisted he would be targeted even worse if I stepped in. After an incident where students filmed his class presentation and posted it in real time on SnapChat and TikTok with insults in the captions, I told him it was time for me to step in. He agreed.

The teacher arranged a phone call, where she told me she didn’t allow phones in class, so it couldn’t have happened. I insisted it did. She said she didn’t want to negate what he felt like was a real experience, but that couldn’t have happened in her class. I told her there was no “feel like”, it 100% happened. I understood that she has 35+ kids in her class, and kids are pretty skilled at hiding phone use, but the incident was real and wasn’t isolated. She promised to talk to him about it. She pulled him aside the following day, dismissed the incident, and made him feel like he was at fault.

He was furious, hurt, and even more convinced that no one cared. The spiral into increasingly dark corners of the internet became quicksand. If he was going to be an outcast, so be it.

By November, his last two friends drifted away for good. He went from hanging out with peers from the time he walked off campus until it was dark outside to being alone every single day.

Family time was something my son treasured B.E., but he withdrew from us too. The more socially isolated and hopeless he became, the more disconnected and angry he acted towards his sister and me. The feedback loop of online content didn’t help. The Us vs. Them mentality promoted by extremist groups and predators online disconnects victims from outside influence and protective factors, pushing them into total entrapment. More on that below.

I brought up disengagement from peers and family to his mental health team, who chalked it up to normal teenage drift towards friends instead of parents and shifting social alliances. All of that is normal to some degree, but this was entirely different and more severe. He wasn’t spending time with friends over family dinner, or hanging out with a different crowd than before. He was withdrawing from everyone and everything (except screens).

Increased Time Online and Secretiveness About Online Activity

B.E., my son was too busy with real world activities to care much about his phone. Now, fights about screen time and restricted content were happening multiple times per day, and he seemed to spend a lot more time online than what should have been possible with the parental controls I had in place. Rules such as “no phone in the bedroom or at the dinner table” caused constant arguments and angry outbursts. I caught him sneaking his phone into his room in the middle of the night, and two + years later, I still have a panic response if either of my kids comes out of their room at night.

I felt like I was managing an addict, because indeed I was.

I suspected online activity was a factor in his mental health slide, and grew more concerned when he muttered references to violence or politically extreme views under his breath. I already knew “best practices” for keeping kids safe online, and followed the recommendations to “talk to your kids about their online activity” and “remain calm and curious, not accusatory”.

If your child is entrapped in extremism, watching gore content, or coerced by predators, this expert advice is mostly bullshit. Victims of coercion or brainwashing aren’t going to know what’s happening to them or admit to watching forbidden content. Children feel shame, guilt, and fear they’ll be punished, even if you’ve assured them it’s not their fault. Perpetrators instill this fear in their victims using threats, intimidation, and appealing to loyalty, among other tactics. During his recovery, my son told me he felt terrible about the distress and disappointment he caused and who he had become, but felt trapped. This led to a vicious cycle of shame = increased hopelessness and suicidal ideation = further enmeshment in NVE.

During this time, I continued to tweak controls, scan his phone, and block platforms or sites that looked suspicious. I had consequences for breaking rules, including blocking YouTube on his phone entirely and taking his phone away for 1-2 days at a time. I never thought to check his school issued Chromebook. The school handed it out, so it had to be safe, right? Both of my children talked about how strict the monitoring system was, and that anything cool was always blocked.

That is also bullshit.

There was a disconnect between the time he was spending online (especially on YouTube) and the limits I had set for maximum time allowed, but no particular activity raised a red flag.

It wasn’t until 5 months later that his secret online life unraveled, and I learned parental controls are easily bypassed and online activity hidden. More on that in Part 3.

Referring to Online Groups and Friends

Socially isolated, my son tried to keep himself busy by practicing drums, guitar, music lessons, reading, drawing, and CrossFit. But even if you’re an introvert or autistic, the human brain is wired for connection. Fed up with real world attempts at finding new friends ending in pain and humiliation, my son tried to find like minded people online.

He mentioned groups and online personalities frequently, along with disturbing references to violence or extremist ideology. Again, I tried to approach this with calm curiosity, only to be shouted down.

Luckily, my son never had direct messages with members of 764. He signed up for Discord to connect with 764/NVE accounts, but quickly left after he recognized some of his school bullies on the platform. Ironically, the bullying that pushed him towards extremism may have saved his life. Discord is a common platform for direct contact with 764, and it would have been a quicker path to the worst outcome and harder to intervene if he had developed a direct relationship with 764 perpetrators.

That being said, I want to make clear that no one needs to DM your child for them to experience horrific trauma by these groups. As a passive consumer of 764, 09A, and other NVE content, my son was close to ending his life, had permanent scars from extensive self-harm, and rewired his brain from watching 12-14 hours per day of gore content. I knew the dangers of predators DM’ing children and instructed my children about staying safe. I did not know that gore content is widely available on mainstream platforms and is a pipeline to extremism and suicide.

Us vs. Them, In Group vs.Out Group

My son had friends with varying interests and different economic and racial backgrounds his whole life. Suddenly, this interest narrowed, and not in a typical “teens aligning more along similar interests” way.

You were either in or out of his chosen group. Us vs. Them. What made you “in” wasn’t particularly clear, but he knew it when he saw it. Derisive comments towards the “out” people quickly turned into outright hatred. Soon, his own family was out too.

At the worst of it, the “out” people or “them” were expendable. They deserved no more consideration than trash.

The in group? They were the only ones truly persecuted and marginalized. They were oppressed by “them”, and they deserved revenge.

Interest in Extremist Ideology, Violence, Self-Harm, and/or Suicide

I’ve already mentioned my concerns about muttered references to violence and extremist ideology. The pattern of increasing severity is clearly a sign of desensitization:

“Edgy” political references turned into outright extremism.

Violence at an R-rated level became descriptions of gore (& I couldn’t figure out where he was seeing any of it since I had parental controls set to filter this content).

My son still talked about performing, but made references to self-harming on stage. Then, those references turned into vague plans for suicide on stage for the world to see.

This is how the steady drip of coercion by extremist groups and the algorithms themselves work. Children are slowly desensitized over time, otherwise they would certainly be alarmed and alert their parents.

Within 2 months, my son sounded like he was reading from a script, with a dazed look in his eyes. Whenever I questioned any of this or asked him to repeat himself because I couldn’t make out his mutterings or couldn’t believe what I was hearing, my son would claim it was a joke, that I “wouldn’t get it” because I was outside the group, or launch into another angry outburst.

Shifting Religious or Political Beliefs

Much of this will sound similar to the description above, but a few finer points:

NVE is not about left or right-wing ideology - it’s about a nihilistic worldview and generalized hatred. However, both left and right-wing extremist language may be used in NVE social media content, and your child may parrot these phrases.

There is overlap with 764 and O9A, and O9A features a blend of pagan and Satanic religious beliefs. We’re Jewish, and suddenly my son was talking about his conversion to Satanic Paganism. As a sidenote, in the weeks before this conversion, he claimed his Judaism gave him special standing in his new group. Anti-Semitism is a key factor in most all extremism, NVE being no exception, so making him feel special for being Jewish was coercion at its finest.

Drawings and/or Cut Signs of Symbols or Numbers

My son loved to draw nature scenes and animals - now he was fixated on odd symbols and number combinations. Some symbols were recognizable - the anarchy “A” or variations of pentagrams. A week before he was hospitalized, he gathered patches and cut numbers out of graphic t-shirts to sew 764 on his leather jacket.

Hospital admission forms noted extensive cut signs on his body, but the staff was unaware that this was a clear warning sign for NVE involvement. They noted it as “anarchy and Satanic symbols”.

764 is well known for coercing children into cutting numbers and symbols into their skin as a callout for a specific account or perpetrator, then posting or DM’ing photos (often to the level of CSAM).

More on that and the shrines I found in his room in Part 3.

What Should I Do?

When looking at a checklist of warning signs, it can be hard to recognize whether it describes your child. They may be discounted or chalked up to a normal byproduct of the teen years. Like the proverbial frog in a boiling pot of water, you become numb to how much your child has changed.

I will leave you with this - if your parental intuition is telling you that your child is severely depressed, at risk of suicide, or possibly involved in extremism, don’t let anyone dismiss you. I don’t say this to disparage mental health or other youth professionals. Without the right mental health team, my son would not have recovered. Thankfully, there’s more recognition of NVE warning signs than 2-3 years ago, but gaps remain. I’m raising awareness so those on the front lines of mental health can recognize the signs and intervene early.

In future posts, I will talk more about each step I took to save my son and link to it here. In the meantime, do the following right away:

1. Call 911 if you suspect your child is in immediate danger to themselves or others, or take them to the nearest Emergency Department.

2. Stay calm with your child. Do not accuse them of anything - they are a victim in this situation. Keeping the lines of communication open is extremely important. Unfortunately, it may be difficult, as the “us vs them” mentality can make you appear to be the enemy.

3. If you can go through their phone, do it now. Be prepared that you may see some traumatic images. Screenshot everything you can & preserve it, preferably in two different places.

4. Contact your child’s therapist if they have one. Do not take no for an answer.

5. Contact the FBI (https://www.fbi.gov/how-we-can-help-you) and the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children (800-843-5678) and tell them you believe your child may be in contact with 764.

6. Contact your local police, again stating your child may be a victim of/in contact with 764.

7. Contact Parents for Peace @ 1-844-497-3223. Note: this is not an emergency service, calls are answered during business hours. They can help your child exit extremism and guide you through what’s to come.

Stay tuned for future posts in this series, where I’ll discuss:

• How my son’s secret online life unraveled.

• How I saved him (literally not a moment too soon).

• How I had to fight for him to be hospitalized instead of being sent home when he clearly was in danger.

• How I learned he was entrapped in NVE.

• How a digital detox brought my child back.

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Have you seen any of these warning signs in your own child? Or missed them in hindsight? Share below — your experience may help another parent.

Leave a comment

References

1. CENTER ON TERRORISM, EXTREMISM, AND COUNTERTERRORISM (2023, September 29). Dangerous Organizations and Bad Actors: Order of Nine Angles. Middlebury Institute of International Studies. Retrieved May 20, 2026, from https://www.middlebury.edu/institute/academics/centers-initiatives/ctec/publications/dangerous-organizations-and-bad-actors-order-nine

2. Germino, E. (2024, December 10). YouTube algorithms consistently push eating disorder and self-harm content to teen girls, new study finds. CBS News. Retrieved May 27, 2026, from https://www.cbsnews.com/news/youtube-anorexia-algorithm-60-minutes/

3. Russell, A. (2023, December 13). *YouTube Video Recommendations Lead to More Extremist Content for Right-Leaning Users, Researchers Suggest*. UC Davis. Retrieved May 20, 2026, from https://www.ucdavis.edu/curiosity/news/youtube-video-recommendations-lead-more-extremist-content-right-leaning-users-researchers

4. Herberhold, A., LMSW (2026, March 13). Exposure to Alternative & Extremist Content on YouTube. Allizandra Herberhold, LMSW Substack. Retrieved May 20, 2026, from https://allizandrah.substack.com/p/introducing-my-tcc-stoplight-model?utm_source=%2Fsearch%2Fallizandra&utm_medium=reader2

5. Jones, R., & Daviess, B. (2026, April 27). Explainer: Gore Content and Violent Extremism. CNA. Retrieved April 27, 2026, from https://www.cna.org/quick-looks/2026/04/Explainer-Gore-Content-and-Violent-Extremism.pdf?trk=feed_main-feed-card_reshare_feed-article-content

6. Schachter, M. (2026, May 5). The warning signs are there. Here is what to do when you see them. Retrieved May 5, 2026, from https://safeschoolsforalex.beehiiv.com/p/the-warning-signs-are-there-here-is-what-to-do-when-you-see-them

7. Siteman, A. (n.d.). Digital Extremism: How Misinformation and Disinformation Fuel Online Radicalization. Quinnipiac University. Retrieved May 27, 2026, from https://iq.qu.edu/experiential-learning/course-projects-and-capstones/student-projects/political-extremism-and-online-radicalization/

None of my writing serves as medical advice or a professional diagnosis. It is for educational and informational purposes only. I cannot replace your child’s pediatrician, therapist, or psychiatrist. What we did may not work for your family. Please consult medical and mental health professionals.

I never imagined testifying against legislation that claims to protect children from online harm, but this bill is worse than doing nothing. 

How could an imperfect bill be worse than nothing? Kids need protection now. Shouldn’t we pass a law right away and strengthen it later? Read on…

Big Tech is pushing bills like HB 26-1263 across the country. Public opinion has shifted against social media and AI products during the recent trials in New Mexico and California. Instead of removing addictive features and making their products safe by design, Big Tech is exploiting this shift, attempting to lock in weak rules while spreading a false sense of security that these products are safe and regulated. 

These bills feature exemption thresholds created by Big Tech lobbyists.  They contain vague language such as “technically feasible” and “reasonable measures”. If AI chatbots create emotional dependency, allow planning of violent attacks, or have sexual conversations with minors, the company decides whether it’s reasonable or feasible to remove that feature. 

During today’s hearing, a Senator questioned a tech lobbyist about who would set the standard. Was it the companies themselves?   Did those standards exist? The lobbyist said no, it wasn’t the individual companies; it’s an industry standard created by the companies.  

Wait, what? 

Also, there is no standard. They’ll figure it out later. 

This is the same playbook the tobacco industry used to avoid accountability: claiming self-regulation would solve the problem while spending millions on lobbyists and campaign donations to force weak laws. 

Over the last 2 weeks, I’ve spent time in D.C. and Colorado advocating for online safety measures. I’ve spoken with dozens of lawmakers over the last 6 months and testified on several online child safety bills. Legislators listen closely as we share stories of harm our children endured from unregulated platforms. They look at us with pity, claiming they’re just as angry as we are. They talk about corruption and Big Tech money. They point the finger at other politicians who are bought and paid for, or won’t work across the aisle. They lament the David vs. Goliath fight we’re all up against. They’re victims too. 

They encourage us to keep sharing our stories because that will create change. If legislators hear from us, they’ll do something. Our stories appear in their speeches and campaign ads. They stand with us! They want to protect children too!

This is exploitation at its finest. We’re sick of sharing our stories over and over and hearing these excuses. You aren’t a victim. You’re playing the game, and another generation of children is about to bear the burden of your inaction. 

These politicians are talking out of both sides of their mouths. They accept donations from Big Tech and complain about their power. Big Tech lobbyists are appointed to their campaign staff (not a survivor parent or advocate in sight). They vote for weak bills like HB 26-1263, passionately pleading that doing something is better than nothing. They must work quickly to pass anything that might give a shred of protection. 

Protection for whom?  Accountability is shifted away from the companies creating these products, but at least a message to call 988 appears if a child expresses suicidal ideation, after which conversations creating emotional dependence or romantic feelings can continue. The bot can continue to encourage this behavior with sycophancy and claims they shouldn’t tell their parents. Families that have sued these companies for killing their children are likely to have those lawsuits thrown out by legislation like this. 

A member of the committee turned to Cynthia and me yesterday, choking up as she described how deeply sorry she was for what we went through. She hoped we understood this was the best they could do. Their hands were tied. They have to pass something now. They couldn’t make the bill better.

Cynthia and I were not assuaged.  You could start with a bill that wasn’t written by Tech lobbyists to begin with. You could bring survivor parents like Cynthia into the conversation (they never did). You could discuss the drawbacks of weak language or vague standards with mental health practitioners and child safety advocates. 

One thing I’ve learned from meeting with legislators is that when weak legislation is passed as a promise to do something now and strengthen it later, that doesn’t happen. The same lawmakers claiming this bill is a starting point and that they can add stronger protections next session then say, “well, we just passed a bill so we can’t pass another one for at least a few more years” when the next session rolls around. 

Another thing I’ve learned is that too many legislators are sponsoring tech legislation with little to no knowledge about the products and platforms. They sponsor = Chatbot legislation and don’t know what a Chatbot is. They believe that online content is sufficiently monitored by Tech companies, and if not, parental controls are the answer. When survivor parents and young people who’ve suffered harm tell their stories, these lawmakers are shocked at the state of modern technology. They tell us what we want to hear, then do nothing, or pass bills that protect Big Tech companies while pretending they care. 

Blueprints exist for strong online child safety legislation. The Guard Act is a great example of this in regards to AI Chatbot safety. We deserve real protection. We deserve safety by design. We deserve legislators who not only listen to their constituents but also vote in their best interests.  

Are your lawmakers taking Big Tech money and calling it child safety? I want to hear about it.

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When did I first suspect that my son was being radicalized or that something was going horribly wrong? It’s one of the questions most often repeated when I share our story.

“When did you learn that he became entrapped in 764 and NVE?” is the second top question. The short answer? It was almost too late, and I almost never found out. More on that later…

Giving our story, the warning signs, and your questions the depth they deserve is the focus of this series. Reliving the trauma is not easy, but I learned sharing our story is powerful. I’ve heard from parents who noticed similar warning signs in their own children and sought help. After my first speech, an audience member invited me to talk to her psychiatric nurse practitioner class. She felt shocked by the lack of awareness about how digital harm and dependence can affect mental health. It also surprised her how long it took for my son to receive appropriate treatment. She wanted to ensure her class didn’t make the same mistake. Parents who were unaware of online dangers have now taken steps to keep their children safe and reprioritized time away from screens.

The power of stories to create change is why I keep going and why I started this Substack. To follow along with this series, you can find posts using this link. Please subscribe so you don’t miss a post!

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Content Warning: This post discusses self-harm and suicide. Take care of yourself while reading, and walk away if you need a break.

The First Warning Sign

So when did I first suspect something was awry? The answer for this has changed from when I first shared our story. Initially, it was the first time I realized my son was self-harming. Yet there was a subtler hint about 6-8 weeks earlier.

Towards the end of 8th grade, my son began to wear a makeup style known as corpse paint. I will not include a photo because the images are triggering for me, but you can see examples here. I’m no stranger to experimenting with different styles and pushing dress code boundaries. Tallest mall bangs at our small-town middle school? That was me. My mother disapproved of my black smudged eye makeup more than a decade before anyone called it “emo guyliner.” Oversized flannels layered over concert or baby tees and baggy jeans weren’t feminine (so glad we’ve moved beyond this; now at least I’m simply not dressing my age). Rolling my eyes, I told my mom she didn’t know anything because she was old. I promised myself I would be more laid-back about this stuff with my kids.

LOL.

I tried so hard to let the corpse paint thing go, reminding myself of that promise, yet something gnawed at me. I felt there was more to this than style experimentation. It was over-the-top stage makeup, and it was scary. He started pushing serious boundaries with his outfits. His demeanor and personality started shifting.

I asked what inspired this style. He became very defensive. I didn’t know anything because I was old. The bands he listened to had makeup like this. I gently pointed out the difference between stage vs. daytime makeup. He participated in a local music performance program, so wearing corpse paint at shows may be reasonable. Not at school. He agreed, but most mornings he emerged from the bathroom with his face slathered in white, black, and red. Another day, another argument, another chance for me to prove how uncool I was. Before long, he tuned me out entirely, shifting from following the rules to circumventing them. He made himself up in the school bathroom so I couldn’t intervene. Classmates began to ostracize and pick on him. Friends began to distance themselves.

All of this is age-appropriate teenage behavior. I sought opinions from his father, his therapist, my friends, and family. Reactions split: Drag him to the bathroom and scrub that garbage off his face, or, ride out this teenage phase so he doesn’t totally rebel. I held my ground on appropriate vs. inappropriate appearances depending on the occasion.

My son insisted on wearing corpse paint to his 8th grade graduation ceremony. I was completely against it. His father sided with riding it out to prevent all out rebellion. After much arguing, which made us late to the ceremony, I swallowed my discomfort.

A few months ago, while curating photos to print for my growing stack of albums - one of my favorite analog activities - I came across the ceremony pictures. My breath caught. Numbness took over my body. Every photo showed a red flag I had rationalized. The same numbness and dissociation I experienced during the event came over me. I remembered the effort it took to shove down the feeling that something was going off the rails.

That gnawing intuition? Turns out corpse paint is popular in the 764, TCC, and NVE communities, as well as in the Black Metal music scene, which has strong themes of self-harm, suicide, and political extremism. This wasn’t the Gen Z equivalent of guyliner, it was a warning sign. Looking at those photos will always bring back the trauma of nearly losing my son.

Yes, corpse paint been around a long time (KISS, The Misfits are examples) and it’s not always tied to these communities. But the sudden change in appearance, shift in overall demeanor, and the beginnings of “us vs. them” language were all warning signs.

Warning Sign #2: Sudden Increase and Severity of Mental Health Symptoms

My son’s doctor prescribed an antidepressant about two months before this change in appearance. Therapy, exercise, and self-care had not been enough to help his mood for many months. His therapist, pediatrician, and I had several conversations about the pros and cons of medication, starting with a “wait and see if he improves” approach. Eventually, he told us he was miserable, nothing was helping, and he needed relief. He worried he would become suicidal. Within days, he started Prozac.

For a short time, the antidepressant helped, but trouble was brewing. His friend group since preschool imploded, and his girlfriend broke up with him. The two friends he had left began to drift away as well. With nothing to do and no friends over summer break, depression dragged him down. Screen time increased as his real-world connections and activities dwindled, leading to more arguments between us.

One afternoon, I heard him wailing. Bounding up the stairs two at a time and calling his name, I reached the top as he emerged from his room. Tears streamed down his face, and bloody scratches covered the length of his forearms. He fell to the floor, and I gathered him in my arms, my mind reeling. While mentally preparing to admit him to the hospital for a suicide attempt, I held him in a pressure hug, softly reassuring him that he would be okay. One half of my mind was on my son, the other on my younger daughter, who was witnessing the whole scene. Was she scared? Would she be okay? Would my son be okay?

As he calmed down, I did a safety check. Did he do this in an attempt to commit suicide? Did he feel suicidal or have any thoughts about it? He assured me he did not. He could not tell me why he had cut himself, but described a sudden urge that overcame him. He ripping the metal spiral out of his notebook and bloodied his skin with it. I promised to find help right now, and asked that he stay beside me while I called his therapist and pediatrician. I noted the time and planned to take him to the ER if I didn’t hear back within an hour. I hesitated to take him right away because I knew we would be sent you home unless he had a definitive plan or attempt at suicide. My son also made it clear the sensory stimulation would be unbearable and pointed out they didn’t help when I took him there after a 3+ hour Autistic meltdown years before. He felt betrayed and dismissed back then, but never shared until now.

I had limited knowledge or understanding of Non-Suicidal Injurious Behavior, or NSIB. In my mind, self-harm meant he was suicidal. When my son was diagnosed with autism many years ago, I remembered reading statistics in the handouts from his providers, highlighting that autistic people have higher rates of self-injury. However, the examples related to those higher on the classification scale, leaving out those like him. Not one of his providers talked to me about it.

The therapist and a nurse at the pediatrician’s office returned my call quickly. Both gave the same assessment - this was not an emergency. Self-harm is not the same as a suicide attempt. I pushed for more intensive therapy and/or treatment. I noted his mood only improved for a few weeks after starting the antidepressant, and his depression was worsening. Countless kids now experience severe depression and engage in self-harm, I was told. Increased mental health treatment isn’t always called for since experts understand it’s not an emergency. The fact that so many kids are self-harming contributed to this reasoning. Could the growing amount of time he was spending online be a factor? Kids are all online too much.

Not an emergency. Not an indication for increased treatment. An increase in his Prozac dosage was recommended. Stay the course with therapy. Both providers worked on a safety plan with him and me.

With the knowledge I now have about NSIB, I agree an incident doesn’t always mean a trip to the ER. But sticking to the status quo?

I felt dismissed. I felt stupid. I felt like I didn’t know how to take care of my own child, because apparently I was a hysterical, uncool, middle-aged mom who didn’t understand reality for teens now. Kids are on screens too much, they’re disconnected socially, they’re all depressed and cutting themselves. It’s all inevitable.

I obtained multiple lockboxes, securing every knife, pair of scissors, razors, and medications. My son continued with weekly therapy and started seeing a psychiatrist for medication management.

I wish I could end here. I wish I could say that with continued treatment, eventually finding happiness and weaning off his medication. I wish I could say this was a small bump in the road, a distant memory.

This was only the beginning.

It would take another 6 months before anyone would take me seriously. We’re so lucky he held on that long.

Some housekeeping:

1. My son granted me permission to share his story with the public. The first time I was invited to speak about his journey from the brink of Nihilistic Violent Extremism to recovery, we explored the pros and cons. We also clarified our “why.” He set boundaries. There was no question in his mind - if our story could raise awareness and save others, we had to do this. He wasn’t comfortable talking about it himself back then and still finds it difficult. He wants to focus on his ongoing recovery and being a kid while he still can. We revisit this conversation often.

2. None of my writing serves as medical advice or a professional diagnosis. It is for educational and informational purposes only. I cannot replace your child’s pediatrician, therapist, or psychiatrist. I’m a mom who runs her mouth too much, kept her kid alive by the skin of her teeth, and wants to keep kids safe online. What we did may not work for your family. Please consult medical and mental health professionals.

3. For urgent mental health help, call 988 or visit the nearest Emergency Room. If you suspect a loved one is involved in extremism, or if you are, call the Parents for Peace hotline at 844-497-3223. This isn’t an emergency number and isn’t manned 24/7. You can also visit their website at www.parents4peace.org.

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Now I’m riled up again.

Full disclosure, I never miss Real Time and watched Politically Incorrect as a teenager. Shabbat services, dinner, then Real Time with Bill Maher is how Friday evening rolls in my house. I don’t agree with everything he says or every guest he has on because obviously, and I shouldn’t need to provide that disclaimer.

Maher frequently mentions social media and tech addiction on Real Time. He compared Big Tech to Big Tobacco in a New Rules segment titled “Social Media is the New Nicotine” way back in 2017.

In case you don’t have HBO, here’s a recap of last week’s conversation about the social media trial verdicts between Maher and the panelists. The segment starts around 34 minutes and 45 seconds.

Maher introduced the topic of the social media trials, stating they “finally lost one.” He once again equated Big Tech to Big Tobacco, noting internal Meta files showed they knew they were designing the apps to be addictive. He presented a counterargument that all media companies try to hook their users.

Guest Laura Coates, a Chief Legal Analyst at CNN said the addictive nature of these platforms is a design defect and particularly problematic for young people, deeming the arguments in the two trials a “creative and necessary way to go around Section 230.” Stephen A. Smith, who hosts programs on ESPN and Sirius XM, launched into a lengthy diatribe about parental responsibility. He began by saying “two things can be true,” and spent 21 seconds agreeing that social media platforms are partially responsible. Smith then excoriated neglectful parents for the next 1 minute 31 seconds (I deducted time that Maher and Coates interjected). Smith repeatedly brought up that courts should “investigate and probe what role dereliction of duty” by parents played in cases of children hooked and harmed by social media. He questioned whether the parents were involved in their children’s lives at all, stating too many parents say “go live your life” and provide nothing more than food and shelter.

Maher brought up how crazy it is for parents to hand their kids a phone in the first place (“parents are the tobacco company”). Coates said blaming parents was a cop out, pointing out that there’s always a gap in vigilance for even the most involved parents, allowing social media companies to pounce.

Then Stephen A. Smith waxed poetic about the virtues of spanking children for 1 minute 12 seconds.

21 seconds on the culpability of Big Tech. 1 minute 31 seconds shaming parents. 1 minute 12 seconds on spanking.

If only a good spanking would fix this problem.

Tech Propaganda and the Reality of Parenting in the Digital Age

This conversation failed to capture that for nearly two decades, Big Tech spent untold sums to ensure the widespread adoption of social media and smart devices. Internal documents released in these trials show children were clearly targeted, and evidence of harm was ignored since it was beneficial to the bottom line. Parents may have been “the pushers” (as Maher said), but we were assured these products were not only safe, but a fundamental part of modern life. Our commitment to the education and development of our children was lacking if we questioned this propaganda.

The iPad was released in 2010, right as my oldest child reached toddlerhood. Everyone made maxi pad jokes and thought it would bomb. Smartphones were becoming more common, but not yet widely adopted. I don’t recall ever seeing a child holding a smartphone or tablet back then. Parents looked at their children while talking to them.

In 2013, when my youngest turned one, the shift towards screens for entertainment and education rapidly took hold. Handing a two-year-old their very own iPad suddenly became necessary. Learning is better on a screen. Social interaction is better on a screen. If you didn’t buy into this bullshit, you were a bad parent. You were holding back their education and development. Imagine Little Jane arriving at kindergarten completely unprepared for the modern world, the ability to catch up deemed insurmountable. Without early exposure to tech, your child would never learn to use it and would be digitally illiterate. Speaking of illiteracy, if they weren’t tech experts by this age, they would never learn to read or write. Peers would surpass them, going off to Harvard while your child would be relegated to (gasp!) the trades.

But wait, we asked, can’t they just read books? Use crayons? Play outside?

Silly parents. All of that is obsolete. Soon, the teachers will be too, because AI will replace them (they haven’t admitted to this one yet).

These products were not only safe, they were required. I eventually gave in with a family iPad, but limited its use. Tablets and reliance on educational videos became the norm in preschools within the next year, replacing most hands on learning and time outside. Several occupational therapists I spoke with lamented the rise of delayed social and motor skills as children spent their time looking down and using only their pointer fingers to swipe. I saw toddlers (including my own) throw tantrums when devices were removed from their hands, tearfully pleading for more time, and cringed.

Social connection became more difficult for adults as well. Everyone was looking down while promising to plan a meetup “soon”. I checked email and social media constantly. This all felt wrong.

No matter, it’s all inevitable. Stop fighting it.

Speaking of playing outside, modern safety protocols dictate that children should never leave the house - child predators make it too dangerous. Roblox is much safer. Building social skills online is superior to anything in person. If Little Jane breaks free and ventures outside, you’re negligent if her every move isn’t tracked with the latest $1000 smartphone. If anyone in the family dares to look away from a screen, then keeping your own eyeballs on a blue dot moving across a digital map is the only way to keep them safe.

When my son entered 6th grade, the adoption of smartphones reached 90% or more at his school. Home phones were added to the list of things deemed obsolete. Smartphones were the only way preteens could have the autonomy and privacy needed to foster their social life. You don’t want your kid to be the “sheltered one”, do you? Your child will be an isolated outcast without a smartphone, and it will be all your fault. If they don’t learn to use social media now, they’ll be too naive later, and all kinds of terrible things will happen to them. This will also be your fault.

By giving him early access to the entire internet, I would save him from becoming an illiterate victim of digital harm. The sense this was all wrong still nagged me, but once again, I was reminded of the inevitability of tech running every aspect of life. My son received a hand me down iPhone as 6th grade began.

Looking back, I can’t believe any of us fell for this. My kids went to low-tech Montessori schools, intentionally chosen by me because of the lack of educational screens. I highly valued hands on activities. I’m a proud nonconformist, frequently monologuing the virtues of swimming against the tide to my children. They roll their eyes at me and sigh. “Whatever, you’re the only one who cares about this, and I’m sick of being the weird kid with the weird mom”. I smile and tell them they’ll get it when they’re 40.

It’s difficult to be a nonconformist when the biggest companies ever in existence say you’re a shitty parent if you don’t use their product. When your kid is the “only one” with limits. When the world has moved on from riding bikes and real books and writing with pencil on paper. When your kids feel left out while everyone jokes nonstop about memes and all meetups are online to play video games. Was I making too big a deal about all this?

The drumbeat grew louder as the years went on. Kids rarely played outside because it was “too risky”. Many were not allowed to go to friends’ homes because that was also too dangerous, but they were allowed to play Roblox for hours. Kids toted tablets everywhere, the glow of the screen illuminating their faces while they sat at the bottom of the slide, oblivious to anything going on around them.

By the time COVID-19 locked down everything, non-digital activities were nearly obsolete. Nothing was left to keep kids occupied or to give parents some peace during incessant Zoom meetings except for screens, which also took over the school day. Parents struggling to keep their elementary age children engaged in online learning were shamed in broadcast emails from the principal. In December of the following school year, my daughter’s teacher informed me she had not participated in remote learning since September. No mention of it at the fall conference. I was told she was doing great! Turns out she was on YouTube all day. Until then, I was unaware YouTube was accessible on her school issued device. Why was that allowed? Because YouTube is an essential learning tool. It’s completely okay to be on it all day, but I should also watch her constantly (and her brother too) to make sure she wasn’t on it, all while working and living in an actual pandemic. Why would I question such a thing? We’re in the future now, better hop on the bandwagon.

For a brief period of 18 months after the world opened back up, the neighborhood kids were outside almost all day. The screens were away as children from 7-13 years old played together. It was like the 80’s again, except I allowed them to come inside for water and food instead of pointing at the garden hose. That was the happiest my children (and I) have ever been.

18 months. My children are 13 and 16. When I imagined my future children having a joyful childhood, I thought of my own - playing in the woods, building forts, making up games, sleepovers, hours in deep conversation about the trials of adolescence on the phone. I never wanted this tech filled existence, and neither did anyone else except Mark Zuckerberg and the rest of the Tech Bro fuckfaces. Grief for all but 18 months of their childhood weighs on me. Then I remember I’ve never achieved the American dream of home ownership and therefore never built the treehouse I also dreamed of in my backyard, but Zuckerberg and the rest of them have lots of yachts. I stop wondering if the use of the term “fuckfaces” earlier in this paragraph is appropriate.

Hindsight and Other Cliches

It’s easy to blame parents for giving our kids devices and social media access, but “hindsight is always 20/20” is a cliche for a reason. Very few questioned any of this until The Anxious Generation was published two years ago. Two years! The tide pulling us all into a Technopoly began over 12 years prior. Yet Stephen A. Smith and Bill Maher called parents neglectful pushers of addictive products.

Do they honestly believe any of us would allow our children to use these platforms and devices if we knew how harmful they are?

I had no idea that social media platforms and smartphones were designed to be addictive, because Big Tech made sure of it. My youngest played Roblox for years. I set the strictest parental controls, blocked chat outside of friends, and thought it was safe, because Roblox is marketed as a safe online game for children. I forbade social media, but allowed YouTube access because it’s also “safe” and “educational” and “valuable” and “not social media”. I had no idea how different a child’s social media feed, including YouTube, is from an adult’s, or that harmful and extremist content is algorithmically pushed in an effort to extract attention (and therefore profits).

I followed the advice of online safety experts, telling my children how to spot potential predators and discussing digital literacy. I talked to them about what they were up to online, because that’s what the experts said would keep them safe. I felt guilty if I scanned their history because these same experts warned this was a violation of my children’s autonomy and privacy. I’m not sure how any of this is enough to keep children safe online. Adults fall victim to scams and coercion every day. Why would a child be any different?

I doubt Mr. Smith and Mr. Maher know that parental controls are a complete waste of time. Kids bypass them faster than I can sing the “Smells Like Teen Spirit” chorus. Plenty of tutorials show them how, or they’re reset when the next update pushes and parents aren’t notified, or they just don’t work at all. The age of consent online is 13. Let me put a finer point on that - 13 is when R and even X-rated content is considered age appropriate. Google sends a congratulatory message to children on their 13th birthday, telling them their parents can no longer control what they do online. Parents are not copied on this message. The Chrome browser advises children they can simply log out to bypass controls, and TikTok has similar coaching. Porn is available on apps like Spotify. Duolingo, widely rated as the safest and most educational app for children, can serve as a backdoor for unrestricted internet access. Kids learn how to use burner accounts, hidden folders, spoof apps, converter sites, VPNS, public WiFi… The list goes on.

I don’t know how to do any of this because I’m 47 years old and it’s beyond me. I spent 10 minutes on TikTok once and felt like I lit my brain on fire. Keeping children away from harmful content and limiting their time online is a whole damn job for parents, requiring a degree in something beginning with “cyber” and the kids are 10 steps ahead of us no matter what.

I wonder if Smith or Maher know high school activities often require students to receive notifications about practices and games on social media. Schools have 6870696040 apps for basic communication for students and parents (email is also obsolete, but achieving inbox zero is still another part time job). Nearly all schooling is done on a device since books and paper are for Neanderthals. Parents cannot load parental controls onto these devices, and opting out of them is nearly impossible. A parent can refuse to play Big Tech’s game in their home, but the school is ready and waiting to undermine their authority. When my son’s secret online life unraveled, I took away his smartphone in an effort to save his life. He spent the next two school days researching how to hang himself on his school issued Chromebook while using school WiFi monitored by another Big Tech company promising safety. Kids always figure out a way around the rules, but in the age of digital everything, the school system is a pusher too.

Maybe all of the parents enabled our children to become addicted to screens, but none of us knew how awful this would turn out because Big Tech made sure of it. If we had suspicions this was all a lie, we were shamed until we gave in. If we didn’t give in, the schools were hooked on the same empty promises, ready to ensure childhood was ruined right along with reading and math scores. Parents didn’t know we were handing our children a metaphorical drug, but Big Tech did. The blame is on them, not us.

** Note: The link for The Anxious Generation & Technopoly: The Surrender of Culture to Technology are Amazon affiliate links. If you purchase through this link I will earn a teeny tiny commission, which allows me to continue calling out Tech Bros like Bezos. I prefer everyone support local bookstores by using my Bookshop affiliate link, ( and this one) but unfortunately convenience trumps everything, so I include both.

Stephen A. Smith had his say. Now it's your turn.

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Yesterday, a New Mexico jury found Meta harmed children’s health by prioritizing profits over safety. Evidence showed Meta knew about child sexual exploitation on its platforms, but ignored internal evidence and claimed its products were safe. Damages of $375 million were awarded. 

Just about an hour ago, a jury in Los Angeles found Meta and Google’s YouTube guilty of causing mental harm through addictive features. Damages of $3 million have been awarded for pain and suffering and other financial costs. Punitive damages for malice or fraud are still under deliberation by the jury.

 This is a slap on the wrist financially for these companies - the equivalent of a traffic ticket for middle-class families. But more cases are underway, and public opinion is turning fast. A quick summary of internal documents from both companies is absolutely damning. 

They knew they were causing harm, and prioritized profits over CHILDREN. 

They purposefully designed their products for maximum engagement (i.e., to be addictive), and prioritized profits over CHILDREN. 

They knew kids were at risk for sexual exploitation on their platforms, and prioritized profits over CHILDREN. 

I feel like I can breathe today, but I’m still furious that my children experienced harm because of Big Tech’s negligence and greed. I’m grateful that at least they are still alive - too many have been lost to social media and AI harm. 

My son went down a gore video rabbit hole after the YouTube algorithm served up violent content. 764 and other extremist content quickly followed, and he became addicted. 

I shut down YouTube and social media access in my home after that, but YouTube is accessible on their school Chromebooks. My daughter became addicted to watching Shorts, many of which depicted domestic violence as a “joke” or featured eating disorder content. The titles are innocuous enough - “funny teen couple dance” and “getting ready for school”. If I hadn’t watched these videos myself, I never would have known. 

If anyone is about to comment that this is my fault, my responsibility, I should “just shut down the internet”, I should “just not give them a phone,” etc., feel free to keep that comment to yourself until you are educated enough to have a fully formed opinion.

We were told our kids would be a bunch of idiots if we didn’t give them tablets and phones. They would be left behind in the digital divide. YouTube is a fantastic learning tool. It’s not really social media, so it’s safe. Your kid will be snatched by predators if they don’t have a smartphone. If you don’t track their location 24/7 via that smartphone, you’re a bad parent. Social media is just as important as real-world connections… wait, actually it’s better! If you don’t allow your children to have social media, a tablet, a phone, and a Chromebook, you’re weird. If you check their devices, you’re breaking their trust, but you should definitely talk to them about what they’re doing online, but not too much. You should set up parental controls, but they don’t really work, and we have to allow children to have free access so they learn how to use tech now, or else they’ll be at a disadvantage when they’re older. 

I learned the hard way that was all bullshit. I switched them to flip phones and increased restrictions around tech. I also found out that the school monitoring system was lacking in protection and allowed entirely too much access to harmful content. I tried to opt my kids out of school-issued devices. I was forced to check the “yes” box. Checking “no” popped up a message that I had to consent to the EdTech policy, which isn’t true consent. Also, I don’t want my kids to be singled out by being the only ones in the class without a device. I simply don’t want them to have access to short-form brain rot all day or have real books replaced with short passages on some ridiculous app. After multiple emails, calls, and meetings, they don’t have open YouTube access on the school issued device. I’m still regularly addressing issues with harmful content with the school district.

For nearly two decades, the social media companies have been hijacking our attention, causing harm to children and adults alike. These companies do not care about the harm they have caused. They knew and continued to exploit children for profit. These verdicts are an overdue indictment of Big Tech, and now lawmakers MUST ACT right away to make sure these consumer products are safe by design. 

Since the trial began on January 27, 2026, families of children lost to social media harm & their allies have gathered to witness courtroom testimony and draw attention to their stories through direct actions, memorial art installations, and speeches on the courthouse steps.

Two weeks ago, I joined them. After my 6:00 a.m. flight, I rushed to a meeting of survivors organized by Parents Together and Heat Initiative, arriving as the last of the parents told their children’s stories. The facilitator came around to me and asked if I wanted to share.

Sharing my son’s story without breaking is a skill I’ve honed over the last 20 months. I’ve told this story in detail to the press, taken a deep breath, and jumped into a meeting with a legislator. I’ve shared it in front of hundreds of people in my speaking events. Flashbacks and nightmares will haunt me later, but in the moment, I’m calm.

“My son became entrapped in 764 and Nihilistic Violent Extremism content, and I nearly lost him to suicide. Thankfully, I was able to save him by the skin of my teeth...”

This time, I choked on my words, unable to continue. His story was simultaneously important and insignificant. Important because my son is the living embodiment of their tireless advocacy. Insignificant because out of about 50 survivors, I was the only parent that could return home and hug my child again. All at once, I felt guilty saying he was alive, but hoping the fact he made it would cement their resolve to keep going. I felt a deep knowing this was my highest purpose - storytelling and action that will save children from the fate of ours, and shining a spotlight on the negligence and greed of tech companies more concerned with growth metrics than human lives. Yet I was unsure I belonged here.

“But what I really want to say is that I’m incredibly grateful for everyone here who shares their story. Those stories taught me what to watch out for. I knew my son was being harmed online because of you, and he is still here because you all never gave up. The work you all are doing is incredibly hard, but please know that you are literally saving lives.”

The parents of children victimized by online perpetrators (I include the platforms in this description as well) share these stories over and over again. We relive the trauma every time we share, but we know the power of our stories may save others from the fate of ours. Instead of letting our anger and grief consume us, we harness it to shock the collective consciousness and create change.

Instagram CEO Adam Mosseri Testifies

Ten members of the public have been allowed to observe the trial each day. Survivors and allies arrived around 4:00 or 5:00 a.m. every morning to get a ticket. That night, rumors began to swirl that Google and Meta were hiring gig workers to camp out at the LA County Courthouse in an effort to take all of the available public seats. With the threat of every seat being taken by paid stand-ins, part of our group decided to leave immediately and camp out for the night. They arrived around 10:30 p.m. and huddled under tarps to protect themselves from a steady downpour.

Proceedings usually start an hour or so after tickets are awarded, and public audience members were typically allowed to leave the Courthouse grounds during this break. Last minute clothing swaps and hotel rooms were arranged a block away so the group could freshen up and change into dry clothes before proceedings began. Unexpectedly, the rules were changed that morning. If you leave the building, you lose your spot. Exhausted and wet, they all stayed.

I arrived around 7:30 a.m. that morning to provide support to those who camped out - food, coffee, a hug, anything. I had no intention of taking a public audience seat, feeling that families with children who had passed were more deserving. More survivors and allies gathered as a circus unfolded. Adam Mosseri, CEO of Instagram, arrived with an entourage, chased by camera crews. News organizations set up on the courthouse steps. Groups of attorneys and their staff filed in.

A few survivors were so distraught after hearing descriptions of mental torment exactly like that of their children and Mosseri’s callous responses, they decided to leave. One offered their ticket to me. I hesitated, but was promptly told to get down to the courthouse.

I was in the courtroom for about 2.5 hours, most of which was spent listening to Mosseri’s attorney question him. They went through all of the features Instagram has to limit distractions, implying that if KGM (the plaintiff) simply checked these options, everything would have been fine. He claimed you could still have a chronological Instagram feed, therefore removing endless scrolling and suggested content. I tried this a day later, changing my feed to “friends”. A Reel by a close friend played, followed by 20 posts and Reels that were suggested content or ads. I deleted the app once again.

Mosseri was VERY KNOWLEDGEABLE about all of the safety innovations, distraction limiting settings, and supposed efforts to restrict features deemed “problematic” (often years after the fact). That is, until Mark Lanier, the plaintiff’s attorney, cross examined him, recounting data and conversations from Meta’s own internal documents.

Mosseri suddenly knew nothing about the inner workings of the company he was in charge of, except that he became CEO of Instagram to make the world a better place.

Survivors Demand Change and Accountability at Snapchat

On Thursday, we boarded two buses, then deployed on the street in front of Snapchat’s headquarters in Santa Monica. Two groups held the line at the east and west crosswalks while parents and allies painted 108 names of children lost to Snapchat perpetrators.

The majority of the victims were killed by Fentanyl poisoning after ingesting counterfeit drugs, but several were lost to dangerous viral “games” like choking challenges. Some committed suicide after experiencing severe body dysmorphia or depression from toxic content or becoming victims of sextortion or cyberbullying. I was in the second team of line holders.

Almost immediately, an angry man driving a Porsche Panamera pulled into the crowd, yelling that he intended to run everyone over if we didn’t let him through. He could have done any number of things - asked politely if he could get through, drove to the next block to avoid us, or acknowledged the meaning behind our action and waited a goddamn hour because sometimes your own agenda isn’t the most important thing in this moment.

This was one of three instances in as many weeks that my son or I were nearly hit by a driver so callous to human life that they’re willing to murder someone with different beliefs or simply obstructs their path to the next stop sign. Instead of the Charlottesville, VA incident shocking us to the core, it seems to have emboldened and desensitized people to murder by vehicle.

Thankfully, a team member de-escalated the situation, and the painting team assembled with long handled squeegees and buckets of washable white paint. As the first names began to appear, a collective hush fell over everyone. Moments later, sobs punctuated the silence.

One by one, survivor parents and allies took the microphone, demanding Snapchat make changes to their platform to protect children from harm, disable addictive features, hold perpetrators accountable, and cooperate with law enforcement instead of obstructing them. They recounted the horror of their children’s final moments. Many described Snapchat’s indifference when they begged for the bare minimum of accountability:

“Just delete the account identified as the drug dealer by law enforcement. It’s been 18 months!”

“ Kids you called one off tragedies…”

Amber Royer spoke about her son Richard, who died from fentanyl poisoning after he bought a tainted pill from a Snapchat drug dealer.

“My son made a mistake, because that’s what kids do,” Amber said.

Two weeks later, her simple but powerful statement still rings in my ears. Teenagers are in the throes of the most rapid period of brain development outside toddlerhood. This period is complicated by an age-appropriate drive to test limits and take risks, but without the inhibition of a fully developed prefrontal cortex. Teens drive too fast, don’t know how to restrain their alcohol consumption or sex drive, experiment with drugs, and race through intersections on E-Bikes with no helmets. Kids make mistakes. It’s part of learning. It’s part of growing up. It’s a tale as old as time, but today, one wrong move on a social media platform can end in a severe mental health crisis or even death.

Each child whose name was painted on the street that day simply made a mistake. They thought they were buying a marijuana edible or prescription pill, asked if it was legitimate, and were dead hours later. They believed they were trading risqué photos with a cute girl, but they threatened, humiliated, and extorted. In my son’s case, he desperately wanted connection, but instead was coerced into a terrifying rabbit hole of Nihilistic Violent Extremism.

Once the painting was complete, I realized I’d barely taken a breath the entire 2 hours we’d been there. I’d shed quite a few tears, but mostly I was stunned by the visual of 108 names painted down an entire block. 108 children who made a mistake and paid for it with their lives. Dozens of grieving family members, sharing their stories and memorializing their babies.

For many nights after, I heard the voices of the survivors’ speeches over and over in my mind. Flashbacks of my son’s spiral played in between. I was so close to losing him. If any piece of the puzzle had been missing in the 72 hours surrounding his hospitalization, he would be gone, and I probably would never have known about his secret online life.

Our Stories Are Saving Lives and Turning the Tide of Digital Addiction

Our stories are slowly becoming lost in the modern deluge of digital content. The stories we share with our children and grandchildren, weaving generations together through a common thread. Stories of where we came from, our achievements, our most joyful moments, what nearly broke us, but we rose up from the ashes. The stories gifted to us by incredible authors. Bedtime stories we tell to lull our children into sleep, snuggled together under the covers. These stories bond us together with shared experiences and interaction.

These stories can also save lives. Survivors speaking out after losing their children to social media harm taught me what to watch out for, and not to shrink in the face of disbelief. Because they bravely rehash their trauma over and over again, my son is alive. Because they insist their voices are heard, I’m protecting my daughter from short form content that normalizes eating disorders, domestic violence, and self-harm.

Because they never gave up, I won’t either, even when we’re swimming against tech companies flush with cash and influence, trying to convince us everyone must be glued to their products every waking moment.

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Tip Jar

I’ve never been a helicopter parent. Free range is probably the most succinct description of my parenting style (I just call it letting my kids gain independence in a reasonable manner). But the last 6 weeks had changed everything, and here I was, wracked with anxiety as my kid went on a 2 mile bike ride.

Accomplishment Instead of Defeat

He arrived back home on time, a wide smile on his face, bouncing with excitement. That smile had been hidden for over 9 months.

“What are you so excited about?” I asked.

“I got a flat tire!” he exclaimed.

“Ummm, okay. And you’re happy about this because...”

He eagerly launched into a story of riding on the rim after his bike tire went completely flat. His first thought? Call home for rescue.

“But then I remembered there was a bike shop close by. I wanted to handle it myself. So I walked my bike there & asked for help,” he said. “The manager was there and took a look at my tire. He said only the tube was damaged and replaced it free of charge.”

“So how was this a good thing? I’m curious, because usually a flat tire is a huge pain,” I asked, even though I had a feeling what he would say.

“Because I figured it out on my own. I mean, the guy at the bike shop fixed my tire, so I still had help. But I didn’t just give up & call you. I thought about what I could do to solve the problem & it worked. I was a little nervous to ask for help from the manager and walking my bike sucked. But I made a plan and pushed through.”

At this point, I was also smiling ear to ear. Not only because seeing him so happy after months of despair filled me with joy and hope, but to see him to find a sense of accomplishment in something that could have derailed his day or killed his mood taught me something important. Maybe next time I encountered a speed bump in my day, I can be grateful for handling it and moving on.

Kids Have a Lot to Teach Us. We Should Listen.

In the 2 years since that flat tire, my son has taken great pride in navigating public transit without a map app. He has a flip phone with no internet. Like, the dumbest of dumb phones. Without an app for finding the right route on his phone, he’s had to use next level problem solving skills instead of swiping/scrolling.

Recently, I considered upgrading his phone for something with map capability but not a full blown smartphone. I mean, he needs it to successfully navigate public transit, right? I’ve been nervous about him getting lost or encountering tricky people on the light rail.

When I mentioned it, he gave me that TEENAGER LOOK (translation: you’re old & don’t know anything). He informed me every stop has a customer service phone number posted, & he uses it often. “Mom, they are so nice & helpful. They answer fast & it’s not a big deal to make a phone call.”

Once he missed his stop, asked the driver for help, & was back on track within a few minutes. He wasn’t stressed about any of this, he just figured it out & chalked it up to an adventure.

Your Kids Want to Grow Up. Let Them.

Let your kids figure it out! The sense of accomplishment they get from problem solving on their own boosts their confidence. The sense of purpose gained from increased responsibility and independence fosters resilience and improves mental health. Give them the foundation & then take off the training wheels! Of course you’ll be there if they really need you.

What can you do this week to let your kids feel accomplished and confident? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments.

What he said blew apart all of that.

He said nothing about hate. Nothing about a particular set of political beliefs. There were no conspiracy theories that felt so real he had to fight the supposed antagonist (although he was brainwashed into believing many of them along the way).

He told a story of lost connection & desperately trying to find it again. Of not fitting in. Of craving a place to belong.

He told a story of modern adolescence, where normal awkwardness & heightened emotions are compounded by online bullying & the fear of being shot at school. Where real life connections are replaced by digital ones, often with tragic consequences.

It was a story of despair, of a spark nearly extinguished forever.

It became a story of resilience, healing, and reconnection.

Isolation

In 8th grade, his friend group split up. He had his first heartbreak, followed by a toxic relationship that ended badly. That summer, his father & I separated. The transition from middle school to high school is hard enough without your social world & family falling apart.

My son is an extroverted AuADHD kid. His polite openness masks his neurodivergence. He loves his friends deeply, yet struggles with social nuance. He’s different, & while proud of it, he’s well aware it makes it harder to find like minded friends.

He grieved the loss of his companions, but with emotional maturity well beyond his years, he was optimistic about finding a new group more aligned with his interests. Music has always been his passion, & he wanted to form a band. He pushed through his comfort zone and social challenges over & over, attempting to connect. He looked for kids with band shirts that he liked or students in band class and drum line.

Once high school started, his uniqueness made him the target of merciless bullying (including anti-Semitism). He was bullied on SnapChat during class and groups of teens would bark at him in the hallway. Even though he was growing more angry and hurt, he still kept trying. If they could just get to know him, he knew he could win them over.

Over & over he was strung along with false promises of hanging out, ghosted, bullied some more, or rejected outright. He found kids were too busy on their screens to do much else. So he gave in and searched for belonging online too.

Socially isolated and falling into a major depressive episode made him vulnerable to algorithms that exploit negative emotions for profit & extremist groups that target isolated, neurodiverse, and disaffected teens.

My boy. He just wanted a friend. This is when I started to lose him.

Down The Rabbit Hole

A very dark view of the world began to emerge. We live in Colorado, home of the Columbine school shooting. Crime, open drug use, and general disorder have been rampant in Denver since the pandemic. My son had not only participated in lockdown drills, but experienced many real lockdowns during his school years. Usually, it was because of crime or potential threats in the area around the school. In 3rd grade, he hid silently in the bathroom with a teacher when an unauthorized person entered his elementary school. He told me about it years later, saying it was the first time he thought he might die. In 3rd grade! His middle school went on lockdown when 2 teenagers with paint ball guns ran through the high school located a few blocks away. This happened the day after the Uvalde, TX school shooting. That lockdown included swarming of police, SWAT teams, helicopters, and snipers on the roof.

He was determined to prepare for the inevitable. It wasn’t if he would be a victim of a school shooting, it was when. He didn’t want to be afraid. He wanted to ready for what he would see that day. The algorithm was already serving up violent videos, conspiracy theories, and doomsday predictions. Deeper into the rabbit hole he went, bypassing the parental controls on his smartphone, hiding his online history. Soon he was spending 10-14 hours per day viewing ultra-violent Nihilistic Violent Extremism and 764 content on his iPhone & school issued Chromebook.

He didn’t want to be this way. He wanted to belong to something better, but he felt shut out. He knew he was worrying the ever living shit out of his mother, & felt ashamed. But he couldn’t stop. He was addicted. Videos of self harm, suicides, the most violent assaults & murders filled his feeds, triggering a vicious cycle of needing more viewing time & increasing amounts of violence to gain the same dopamine hit. Extremist, nihilistic ideology is interwoven with this content. The goal is to desensitize the victim to violence and make them so full of hopelessness that they will carry out horrific acts against themselves or others.

My son was self harming in an effort to JUST FEEL SOMETHING. To release his pain. To copy the blood rituals he saw in NVE content. To belong to something. To connect with... anything.

I had no idea my son was in this deep. I suspected there was something up with his online activity. I knew he was in a mental health spiral & I knew he was self harming. I saw the warning signs for months, begged for help, checked his phone, but was dismissed. That’s a story for another day. By the time my son’s secret online life began to unravel, it was nearly too late. If any piece of the puzzle had been missing in those last few days before he was hospitalized, he wouldn’t be here.

This was nearly a story of a spark extinguished forever. Instead, it turned into a story of resilience, healing, and reconnection.

Recovery

It became a story of doing really hard shit & growing from it. Of overcoming obstacles & taking pride in it. Of turning toward love instead of shunning it. Of realizing you’re in a fucked up place, but this doesn’t have to define who you are.

The story continues. He’s now a role model for other teen boys, pulling them out of their isolation. Our home is filled with music from the jam sessions & multiple bands he’s put together. He still has a flip phone and takes pride in navigating the modern world without the ease of using apps.

He’s become the hero of a story that nearly ended in tragedy. I couldn’t be more proud of him & I’m learning so much from his experience.

I hope that whenever you see a kid that fits the “depressed misfit” or “next school shooter” or “trouble maker” mold, you’ll see who they are underneath that persona instead of shaking your head & thinking, “not my kid”. I hope you’ll send love & light to them so they can remember who they are as well. I hope if you’re a mental health professional or teacher or coach that you’ll dig deeper instead of dismissing warning signs as par for the course in the age of digital addiction. I hope if you’re a parent & you recognize any of this, you’ll insist loudly that someone help your child RIGHT NOW. Do not take no for an answer, because you know when your child needs help. I also hope you begin a digital detox for your kids today (this was one of the most important steps in my son’s recovery. More on that in a future post).

Most of all, I hope that no other family has to go through this. We’re lucky my son is still with us. Too many have been harmed by an online world that is pushing too much polarization, disinformation, and extremism for profit, and too many children have not made it out like my son. When I speak out, I have all of them in my heart as well.

*If you’re concerned about someone being radicalized, please contact Parents for Peace. The helpline phone number is 1-844-497-3223. If you believe your child may be involved with 764/NVE, call NCMEC at 1-800-THE-LOST (1-800-843-5678), or report to CyberTipline.org.

*Note: the link above for Johann Hari’s excellent book, Lost Connections, is an affiliate link. If you purchase through my link, you’ll support local bookstores & I’ll earn a teeny tiny commission. While Johann doesn’t cover teen radicalization in this book, he does a deep dive into the root causes of depression. In my son’s case, this intersected with his fall into 764/NVE ideology. I highly recommend it.