Sooo, I figured I’d clarify what may be obvious to some but for those who thought this might merely be a “travel journal,” ahh, it’s a bit more. I intended this to be an outward expression of everything I’m thinking and feeling as I seek to recover from my most recent family tragedy, the loss of the love of my life, who though she was 3 yrs older than me (some jokingly suggested “cougar” 😂) I thought of as my “trophy wife” - vivacious, fun-loving, generous and giving beyond belief. Sadly we only had 14 years together yet I realize I have had far more blessings than ~99% of Earth’s human population but still… I miss her terribly. Since accepting Jesus of Nazareth as my Lord & Savior, devotionals have become an important aspect of my life and even more so since Kath was diagnosed. Now that I’m truly on my own traveling the country they are even more-so. To this point I find different devotionals clearly fit into my day, though not necessarily from the same sources. As such, I’ve come to integrate the ones most poignant for my day’s experience into each journal entry. I hope y’all don’t mind wading through it - I feel it actually does all fit together.😉

Wed (07.08) Acadia National Park, ME

As I mentioned in the last post, I felt it important to come back to Acadia because Kath & I honeymooned there in Aug 2015 and visited again in 2018. Having arrived late on Monday July 6th and exploring several aspects of the park the day prior (detailed *in “week 5’s” post) I decided to do my devotionals down at the water’s edge of the “KOA Bar Harbor Oceanfront” campground on Mt Desert Island (hereafter, MDI - just outside Acadia) - it was quite beautiful and peaceful.

The effort started out with a solid reminder from Max Lucado’s devotional calendar, “You’ll Get Through This” provided by Kath’s gracious Aunt Nancy:

“Gratitude doesn’t come naturally. Self-pity does. Bellyaches do. Grumbles and mumbles — no one has to remind us to offer them. Yet they don’t mix well with the kindness we have been given. A spoonful of gratitude is all we need.”

On top of that, I’d received some very encouraging messages sent by Jordan, a good friend from church at home, including a few great prayers. Her heartfelt “stream of consciousness” prayers were heartfelt and appropriate - helping remind me to be grateful for the opportunity to take this healing journey and to work on that recovery in beautiful places such as this, regardless of my acceptance of the impetus of the journey. Her messages made me grateful not for the cause of the trek, but the opportunity to try and heal in this manner, and in locations such as these.

As I sat at the water’s edge watching several young families around the campground exploring; watching a dad riding a bike with a kid who couldn’t have been more than three, and a Mom & child exploring the tide pools, it made me wish I had brought my girls to more places like this rather than so many trips to Disney & Longaberger in OH, which were fun, but a different kind of recreation and $$. We have many good memories of those places but I am grateful my ladies are making the effort to spend time with family outdoors, ensuring their kiddos experience the wonders of God’s amazing creation. 💜

Tony Dungy’s “One Year Uncommon Life Daily Challenge” devotional focused on public prayer, at meals and elsewhere. This is something with which I’d traditionally been uncomfortable but no longer! Coach D made the point that sometimes people have commented on his family’s prayer at restaurants and referencing MATTHEW 6:5-6: “When you pray, don’t be like the hypocrites who love to pray publicly on street corners and in the synagogues where everyone can see them. I tell you the truth, that is all the reward they will ever get. But when you pray, go away by yourself, shut the door behind you, and pray to your Father in private. Then your Father, who sees everything, will reward you.”

Coach D posed the question:

“Is public prayer a witness or an act of pride? Or is it something else - like an act of love and affection? I think it depends entirely on the state of our hearts as to why we pray—whether it is in public or private. If we as a family thank God for our blessings on a regular basis, I don’t think we need to, or should, stop doing that when we’re out in public. If, however, our motivation for praying in public is to be seen and to demonstrate to others that we are a family who prays to God, then maybe we’ve got a problem. Because then it seems to be about us. And if it’s about us — well, then, it probably is not about God.”

UNCOMMON KEY > Praying to God is a matter of the heart - wherever and whenever you pray — a heart that loves, trusts, and surrenders to Him. Make sure your heart is right before bowing your head or closing your eyes.”

(C) 2011 Tony Dungy

My conclusion was that oftentimes, prayer is what recenters me & gets my heart back to where it should be - with Him. Yet, from a “style” standpoint, I’ve been trying to have more frequent conversation with the Lord rather than “formal prayer” because I’ve become convinced that’s what “relationship” entails.

At some point during the day I received a phone call or likely voicemail, given the spotty cell reception, that truly amazed me. The Nurse from my Primary Care team at the VA (Veteran’s Admin hospital) back home in Wilmington, called to follow up on my recent Urgent Care visit to the VA in NH. I was surprised that 1) my local team even knew about it, knowing that the NH facility was in a different VA region & 2) someone actually took the time to reach out and check on my well-being. This new VA Care team to which I’ve been assigned has demonstrated more follow up than the civilian doctor I had in MD for almost 20 years! So far, my VA experience is batting 1.000!

After chow I sought a lake to kayak. While unloading my boat I saw a family biking together and the Dad was wearing the geek-iest shirt I’d ever seen but my old Engineering math from Navy in the mid-80s came back to me - can you decipher? 🤣(hints: the square root of -1 is the “imaginary number” “i” and Sigma is used to “sum” numbers).

I kayaked ~6 miles on the gorgeous and calm Eagle Lake in 2 1/2 hours - it was so scenic! I met a local couple out on the lake who were kayaking as well. They’d recently retired from the Education system, moved up to MDI and were working part time in the Park. They completely understood what I was doing.

Following the workout I headed into Bar Harbor, figuring it was time to revisit where we Honeymooned in Aug 2015 and returned again in 2018. In order to properly honor Kath I went looking for Mt Desert Island Ice Cream, the place she & I visited back then - this was one of my favorite pix of her from that trip - abject confidence in her selection of ice cream establishment. :)

Following ice cream, as my current form of post-outdoor activity refreshment, I sought out a local brewery and landed on Blaze Brewing for a local IPA & Duck Fat Fries with spicy aioli - excellent! My Cousin Robin had suggested getting some “steamers” (steamed clams) yet sadly the brewery didn’t have them (or even any “stickers” advertising their business which my girls had suggested I collect from every brewery visited along this trek) so I asked the barkeep where I should go. For “steamers,” he told me “Bar Harbor Lobster Company” down the street. I went there, and sat at the bar next to a young couple from the Philadelphia area. Matt and Stacy had been dating for some time, but came up to Bar Harbor because they planned to attend a wedding in Connecticut and figured they would detour to Acadia…not exactly on the way from Philly to CT, but I get it. 🤪 They’re both National Parks people and had been to a lot of parks around the country on their own and with each other. We spent over an hour getting to know each other, and talked about practically everything! After I’d listened to their backgrounds, I shared my story, and she asked me how I still had faith after all I’ve seen. I explained I couldn’t possibly have made it through all this otherwise, practically mirroring a somewhat recent conversation with an Atheist at my former employer. I shared my path via MacKenzie’s cancer journey and loss, Kairos Prison Ministry in MD, and our community of faith in Southport. They seemed to have both been raised Catholic and seemingly had “drifted” so I addressed the generally “works based nature” of that denomination, similar to the one I’d experienced and made the basics of the Gospel clear, sharing my newest tattoo. They both admitted that I gave them some things to think about. 💪🏻💜🙌🏻

After chow I attended the “night sky” program at Sand Beach, and it was a beautiful but chilly night. I neglected to bring one of the numerous fleece or sweatshirts I’d brought on this trip 🥶 yet all in all this was a much better day than prior. 🙌🏻

Thurs (07.09) - Acadia

The musical devotional I did from “Sing” by “The Worship Initiative” was entitled “Yes & Amen,” based on Ephesians 1:3-14

“Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will — to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves. In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, in accordance with the riches of God’s grace that he lavished on us. With all wisdom and understanding, he made known to us the mystery of his will according to his good pleasure, which he purposed in Christ, to be put into effect when the times reach their fulfillment—to bring unity to all things in heaven and on earth under Christ. In him we were also chosen, having been predestined according to the plan of him who works out everything in conformity with the purpose of his will, in order that we, who were the first to put our hope in Christ, might be for the praise of his glory. And you also were included in Christ when you heard the message of truth, the gospel of your salvation. When you believed, you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a deposit guaranteeing our inheritance until the redemption of those who are God’s possession—to the praise of his glory.”

In summary, God has:

• Blessed us

• Chosen us

• Made us blameless

• Predestined us

• Adopted us

• Redeemed us

• Forgiven us

• Made known to us

• Unified us

• Given us an eternal inheritance

• Sealed us

• Guaranteed us

• Poured out His glorious grace upon us

Blessed be the God & Father of our Lord Jesus Christ who has given us every good thing under heaven & earth!”

Thereafter, I noted a friend had passed along a devotional from “Turning Point” by Dr David Jeremiah almost a month previous yet which I’d missed until this AM. In one of my small groups in SPT we’d been reading his book “The Promise of Heaven” which I had been reading out loud to Kath during her last treatments and on hospice. This devotional’s topic was quite appropriate for where I was, both physically and emotionally…

The Great Outdoors: Nature Reflects God’s Peace (06.14)

“For you shall go out with joy, and be led out with peace; the mountains and the hills shall break forth into singing before you, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.” ~ISAIAH 55:12

“Every single day millions of people play ocean sounds from their music streaming services for relaxation, sleep, and ambient noise. The repetitive sounds of waves crashing and receding calm us. Psychologists have noticed that recurring ocean sounds resemble actual biological rhythms such as breathing and heartbeat patterns. The Lord has built these peaceful patterns into His creation for our benefit.

It’s true that nature was diminished by Adam’s sin in Genesis 3. Weeds now grow naturally while crops must be cultivated. Natural disasters occur. But the genius of God’s creative ability still shines through. What restoring, refreshing moments we experience when we sit in the sunshine, gaze across a mountain vista, or even hear the birds chirping! Being outdoors is good for us physically and mentally. There’s value to sitting on the porch or patio watching the sunrise or sunset. Puttering in the backyard or hiking in the forest is therapy for the soul.

This summer find a way to let God’s vast outdoors bring peace and joy to you! Spending time outside, enjoying God’s creation is good for us.” ~Gemma Hunt

Then Tony Dungy’s “One Year Uncommon Life…” struck gold again, meeting me right where I am:

“No, dear brothers and sisters, I have not achieved it, but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead.” PHILIPPIANS 3:13

“Press on, move ahead. Forget what is behind whether it’s good or bad, whether anything made any sense at all, yesterday is done and gone. That was one of the things I always tried to impress upon my teams. No matter what happened on Sunday — even if it was a devastating, last-second loss, by Monday night they had to let it go. Focusing on last week’s game would not help them prepare for the next one.

We can’t replay what’s past or change what occurred. We want to think we can, we wish we could, often out of a sense of guilt or loss for whatever happened. It probably explains why so many popular movies have dealt with the subject, like “Back to the Future,” “Mr. Destiny,” or “Sliding Doors.” But as the apostle Paul recognized, we’re just not going to change the past.

And that’s why Paul makes the only rational decision he can make and offers the same to us, as well: he forgets the past and presses ahead. If there’s anyone who could have clung to the past—the decisions he’d made, the people who’d wronged him — it would have been Paul. After Paul’s conversion on the road to Damascus, he became hunted and persecuted with the same zeal with which he hunted and persecuted Christ’s followers. Now Paul followed Christ and served the believers called by Christ to touch the world. Time and again Paul was wrongfully imprisoned or beaten nearly to death for his new life, witness, and uncompromising testimony for Christ.

Where are you today in your journey with Christ? Are you stuck in the past, holding on to regrets, remorse, or feelings of guilt for things you should have done or people you should have spent more time with? Are you still holding on to grudges against someone else for something they did to you, which they have long ago forgotten?

Forget it, and press on to reach the heavenly prize of a continuing relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.

UNCOMMON KEY > Release your past by giving it to Him, and press on to reach the heavenly prize of being in His presence forever.”

(C) 2011 Tony Dungy

Well, THAT hit home! Moments thereafter, as I was finishing my devotionals at the waterfront, I had a crazy engagement! I saw a young family with a 30’ Airstream Flying Cloud at a campsite nearby and the kids were playing on the rocks so I started chatting with the Mom and explained a little bit about what was going on. Then the Dad came over and joined in the conversation but he hadn’t heard my story and I didn’t want to rehash it so we talked about camping in different parts of the country. They were planning to head to Shenandoah after the Catskills and we talked about NY’s Finger Lakes and the FL Keys. I made some recommendations in Shenandoah, one of Kathy’s faves, the Keys and the Finger Lakes (in particular Sampson State Park). His wife must’ve spoken with him about me because he came over later to my trailer and shared they’re from the Greenville, SC area and run a coffee company called “Bridge City Coffee” and he gave me a bag of their coffee! He and I started talking and it turned out he’d lost his mother in a car accident in which he was also involved as a child. He showed me his tattoo, making a comment about “souls” so I asked if he was a believer in Jesus and he acknowledged, after which I showed him my newest “ink,” and we talked about Faith. Similar to me, it sounded like he was always a “Believer,” but didn’t become a “Follower” until he and his wife went away for an anniversary, and he had a moment where it kind of “crashed down,” thinking “What am I doing, do I believe in eternity or not?” And that’s when it turned the corner for him. His experience resonated with my truly coming to Christ in SPT. We spoke a bit more and he asked if he could pray with me, which we did! 💪🏻

As it was my last day planned in Acadia I was restless, feeling like I had to keep moving, so I drove out to Sand Beach to hike the Great Head Trail as I did during our honeymoon in 2015 while Kathy sat on the beach. I’ve never really been a “beach-sitter” but boy could Kath hold down a beach chair! I loved that hike back then and scrambled over rocks to obtain the most radical view possible, finding an outcropping on which to eat the lunch I’d packed. Watching the waves crashing over the amazingly rocky coast l marveled that Kath’s Living Tribute party was four months ago that day and then she was gone 15 days later. I simply can’t even wrap my head around it at times.

I resumed my drive around the island and did a relatively short (but strenuous) ~4mi bike ride around Upper Hadlock Pond but was still restless afterwards so drove way down to Bass Harbor Head light station that Kath and I had visited prior.

During the drive I heard TobyMac’s song “I’ve Been Through It” - 100% on target.

It seemed like the lighthouse was chock full of couples and families sitting on the rocks, likely waiting for sunset but as much as I’d felt like I needed to go to the lighthouse, I suddenly didn’t feel like hanging around. I tried listening to other music while driving, numerous Country artists but every song that came on seemed to be some sort of sad love song…

Determined to get out of the funk and complete the trifecta of outdoor activities that day I kayaked the Mt Desert Narrows at the North end of the island at high tide as had been suggested (~1830 or 630PM) from Hadley Pt and saw a Bald Eagle, remembering how Kath and I had joined a kayak tour on our honeymoon in 2015 in a similar area and had seen 2 Bald Eagles actually dogfighting for a common prey - that was amazing! This time I paddled through several schools of fish and had heard from another couple out paddling that some seals were in the area but didn’t see any. It started sprinkling as I was finishing up about ~5 miles & 1+30 paddling. Funny how it only took about 10 to 15 minutes to get the boat off the truck but about a half hour to get it back on - the bugs were ferocious!

Fri (07.10) - Acadia -> Bridgton, ME -> VT

Waking up to secure the AS for travel and depart Acadia, the Apple Health said I slept well but I didn’t feel rested, which I’ve not found to be uncommon.

In reading Max Lucado’s You’ll Get Through This - “The grateful heart sees each day as a gift.” I thought how I try to express gratitude each day, repeatedly throughout the day, but in reality, sometimes, like this morning, waking up doesn’t necessarily feel like a gift, but more of a burden.

Tony Dungy’s “One Year Uncommon Life…” topic for the day was on marriage and “Complementary Gifts,” which I found important enough to share over Facebook with the following preamble:

“The phrase “opposites attract” is popular, but I’ve found, as supported by this from Coach Tony Dungy, marriages are more successful if both the husband and the wife do NOT have the same strengths and weaknesses. Further, we need to honor & cherish those differences because they allow us to accomplish MORE! What’s that popular phrase - “isn’t diversity our strength?”😀

I’m afraid that oftentimes Scripture is used to support a particular viewpoint by “picking and choosing” the passage one desires yet as the learned Greg Koukl says “never read a (single) Bible verse…” We need to read beyond a single phrase or two and consider the larger context.

Sadly some have used parts of the book of Ephesians to suggest that the husband is “in charge” and the woman is somehow “subservient.” While culturally, 2000 years ago “roles” were viewed differently than now, Nothing could be further from the truth as to God’s design & INTENT, as Coach D lays out below.”

“A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect, her husband.” ~EPHESIANS 5:31-33

“Talking about the roles of men and women in marriage can stir up a lot of controversy. The idea of well-defined roles makes many of us uncomfortable in this day and age, me included. What concerns me is that these discussions tend to focus on who gets to be in charge. But the Bible makes it clear that both husbands and wives are supposed to be looking out for each other’s well-being, not concentrating on who has the power. That means, as a husband, I’m supposed to be doing everything for the good of my wife.

Look at it another way: God is not only my Father, He’s also my spouse’s Father. That means He’s my Father-in-law. That’s a pretty heavy responsibility. That motivates me to serve, not to figure out who’s in charge.

One of God’s gifts to us in marriage is the idea of roles - that each of us brings something unique to the partnership. Putting others first is never easy, and it can be especially taxing in the context of marriage an up-close-and-personal, day-after-day relationship.

In that kind of bond, you can’t take a break from looking out for each other. Your spouse’s well-being is just as important to you as your own.

Try this exercise to help you see how your partnership works:

• Take a look in the mirror and recall all the things you are good at — in your career, at home, with the children, at church, and around the neighborhood.

• Think about the things you love to do. those things you’re passionate about.

• Then think about the things you aren’t so good at or that you never look forward to doing.

• Now take a moment to go through the exact same questions about your spouse.

Do you see how you fit together? The picture that emerges will tell you a lot about your roles—and how you can put each other first.

Remember above all that your role in marriage is for your spouse’s benefit.

UNCOMMON KEY > Your spouse’s well-being is directly related to yours. Seek to fulfill your role in your home, not solely for your benefit, but for the benefit of everyone in your family.”

(C) 2011 Tony Dungy

I left Acadia that morning or I should say MDI, which is where Acadia is located and while driving across Maine to visit some old friends from our church in SPT who’d relocated to Maine (and have MORE children… ) I was listening to “The Message” on SiriusXM as I usually do, and the host, Doug Hannah delivered another one of his wonderfully inspirational faith nuggets: “Jesus did not just die for the mistakes for which you’re sorry, and have repented, but also the ones that for which you have been unable to forgive yourself.” Hmmm…

Further, listening to Jason Gray’s “Acoustic Storytime” program, one of his guests, Ellie Holcomb sang a song her husband wrote called “What Would I Do Without You” and it occurred to me, sadly I’m discovering that…

A few other impactful songs played throughput that program:

“The Long Surrender” by Bear Rinehart & NeedToBreathe

“The Whole Thing” also by Ellie Holcomb

And “The Land of the Living” by Jason Gray

In the latter, this line resonated: “Remind me what I feel like quitting that I’ll see your goodness in the land of the living”💪🏻

The next day I clipped 5k mi on the trek thus far and made it to Jeremy & Amanda K’s around dinner time - as usual, my timing was impeccable. 😳 Last year Jeremy took an Executive Pastor job up in Maine & due to all our travel for Kath’s treatments we were unable to see them and they cute “little” brood off so I’d wanted to stop by to see them. He was one of our teaching pastors @ Generations originally from Damascus, MD, VERY close to where Kath & I had lived and I’d learned an awful lot from him. Amanda is a sweetheart and an incredibly positive Believer with a clear penchant for hospitality in addition to managing kiddos. She was due any day for I think number 7 but of course she ensured I had some chow before hitting the road for VT!

After visiting for a few hours I rolled out and finally landed at my “Harvest Host” spot after 10PM. It was really an old Methodist Church on the top of a hill in Brattleboro, VT but it wasn’t clear how often it had been in use because the landscape was a bit overgrown yet there was another RV there so I thankfully knew I was in the right place.

Sat (07.11) - VT -> PA

I hit some devotionals prior to a looong day of driving to try and make it back to Steve & Mary T’s in W. PA. I often find the Q&A from “Our Daily Bread” to be somewhat revealing if I’m being honest, but is there really any other way?

Our Daily Bread - UNCHAINED BY GOD

“Therefore I endure everything for the sake of the elect, that they too may obtain the salvation that is in Christ Jesus, with eternal glory.” 2 TIMOTHY 2:10

“Bulgarian lifeguard Yane Petkov won a world record for swimming with is hands and feet tied together. He swam 3380 meters through the water but added something to intensify the challenge—he wrapped his body in a sack.

The patience and strength required to keep moving despite being so “tied up” amazes me. The apostle Paul also displayed rugged resistance to obstacles as he served God in the days of the early church. Despite facing fatigue, hunger, sleeplessness, and beatings, Paul continued to preach and write letters of encouragement and instruction to his fellow believers.

Paul penned his last letter to Timothy when he was isolated in a Roman prison, awaiting execution. Although shackles restricted his body, he noted that the good news could not be “chained” (2 TIMOTHY 2:9). “Therefore,” Paul said, “l endure everything” to give others the chance to hear and accept the truth about Jesus Christ (V. 10).

God can help us endure any kind of difficulty that stands in the way of serving Him. Physical limitations such as illness, injuries, and disabilities require care and attention, but they can’t ultimately surpass God’s power, which is made perfect in our weakness (2 CORINTHIANS 12:9). Let’s give God the glory when He works through us to do things we cannot do on our own. ~JENNIFER BENSON SCHULDT

Q: “What’s your greatest area of struggle as you consider serving God?”

My A: I’m not so sure it’s a “great struggle” but at times it’s hard just to get up and get going. I know that God has good plans for me but sometimes it seems like “what’s the point of doing what I’m doing?” I mean, I know I’m trusting the Holy Spirit to build the Lord’s Kingdom with whatever encounters I have but it also seems like I should be “doing something more/different” at times, but I don’t know what that is so I guess my greatest struggle is hearing from God more clearly. Yet I guess that would mean being quiet more often. 😳

Q: “How does He want to help you cope with the frustration that comes from your limitations?”

My A: Scripture says to trust Him, to come to Him, those who are heavy laden and he will give us rest. I’m trying to deal with logical circumstances yet at times it seems I ought to “do something” or “doing “something else.”

“Dear God, I lay down my pride and ask for Your help to bring glory to Your name.”

(C) 2026 Our Daily Bread

I traveled through the beautiful and hilly Green Mountain National Forest of VT, across much of PA and stopped for gas at Sam’s in Erie, PA. A woman named Barbara pulled up at the pump right across from me and commented on my “Rig” and not wanting to pay for the gas to pull THAT which lead to some further dialog. I pivoted into a conversation about my trek and “why.” As it happened, she’d lost a son to cancer years ago and I believe she said she lost her mother to a glioblastoma (VERY challenging variety of brain tumor) as well and that she was also divorced (merely a few similarities). We talked about both MacKenzie and Kathy and she asked to see pictures of both of them. She mentioned having a vision or visitation of her child and that she expected I would be able to see Kath again. She suggested I might visit a spiritual site in Sedona if I made it there when eventually passing through AZ and I shared I was a Biblical Christian. She then asked if I was “open minded about other things.” I told her I loved all of God‘s creation and was willing to consider other ideas, ending up explaining my newest tattoo, and telling her about the book of Romans and John’s Gospel. She sounded like she was willing to read Romans and I remembered I had two more “pocket” Gospels of John left in the Tundra so I gave her one of them and she said she’d read it. She’d not heard of Substack but gave me her email address and I sent her the link as well as the picture we took together at the gas pump. She mentioned she was really glad that we’d met and conversed, and referred to such occurrences as a Godwink.🙏🏻

I finally arrived at Steve & Mary’s farmette and we played Rummikub. I didn’t think I’d played a game with another person since Kathy passed and certainly not with her for a while prior. We used to always play games while camping but sadly I couldn’t remember the last time - possibly last fall? 😢

I went back and listened to some of Kathy’s old voicemails, and it occurred to me that there were some weeks that I had every day with her, but didn’t really spend much “quality time” with her… oh, what wasted time working so many hours… 10 yrs married?! Dear Lord, where did the time go?😭

Sun (07.12) - Stoneboro, PA

I joined my good friends and former neighbors Steve & Mary at their church, Oak Grove Church, where a young couple sang Laura Story’s “Blessings” - beautiful, but heart-wrenching at times. I’ve probably shared it previously but…

Pastor Fred delivered a solid message: “Though our circumstances may feel broken, God is not!!” His summation was centered around Christ’s Compassion & Calling

Matt 9:35-38 “Jesus went through all the towns and villages, teaching in their synagogues, proclaiming the good news of the kingdom and healing every disease and sickness. When he saw the crowds, he had compassion on them, because they were harassed and helpless, like sheep without a shepherd. Then he said to his disciples, “The harvest is plentiful but the workers are few. Ask the Lord of the harvest, therefore, to send out workers into his harvest field.”

He shared: “A bridge doesn’t cross over a river for itself, bridges go somewhere. Jesus is the bridge to God!” And then referenced Brandon Heath’s “Give Me Your Eyes” which I’d first heard “inside” serving with Kairos Prison Ministry at MCI-J (MD Correctional Institute - Jessup):

“Give me Your eyes for just one second

Give me Your eyes so I can see

Everything that I keep missin’

Give me Your love for humanity

Give me Your arms for the broken-hearted

The ones that are far beyond my reach

Give me Your heart for the ones forgotten

Give me Your eyes so I can see”

And then Pastor Fred challenged us: “Where is the Lord of the Harvest sending YOU?” Hmmm…

Tony Dungy’s “One Year Uncommon Life…” was entitled “Attitude Instructions” and resonated with what I’ve often tried to espouse, especially to my girls as they were growing up.

“Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” 1 THESSALONIANS 5:16-18

“These verses are packed with attitude instructions. That’s a good thing, because our attitude toward what life throws at us has so much to do with the outcome.

In his book “Man’s Search for Meaning,” Viktor Frankl recounts the unspeakable horrors of his longtime imprisonment in Nazi concentration camps like Auschwitz and Dachau, where he was stripped of everything. His father, mother, brother, and wife had died in similar camps. Yet despite losing all his possessions; having all value destroyed; suffering from hunger, cold, and brutality; and expecting his own execution to come at any moment, Frankl still found that life was worth preserving.

In what little there seemed to be left of his life, he found value and hope. Despite his circumstances, he had not been stripped of one of the last human freedoms— “the ability to choose our attitude despite our given set of circumstances.’

Frankl’s experiences serve as a reminder that even though we can’t always choose our circumstances, we can always choose our attitude in the circumstances. We can realize the capacity within each of us, with God’s hand on our backs, to rise above those circumstances. Our choice reveals the depth of our inner character directing our lives and will shine brightly in the most dire circumstances, whether the outcome is life or death.

God has given each of us potential - to know Him, to receive Him, and then through Him to make a difference in this world, one person at a time.

UNCOMMON KEY > Attitude is everything - or at least a great, big piece of everything! Check your attitude as you do small tasks and then take on greater things. Your attitude should be the same for both.”

(C) 2011 Tony Dungy

After church I really needed to get the Tundra’s oil changed and as the Airstream was detached in Steve & Mary’s pasture, I proceeded to “Take 5” in Meadville, PA where Dakota and Ryder performed a great service with solid conversation - although rather young (from my 59 yr old perspective) they seemed to appreciate the notion of the brevity of life. True to form, I sought a local brewery and found Voodoo Brewing - I was server Bella’s 1st customer for the day ~noon, so she was pleased. I noticed she had the words “Wish You Were Here” tattooed visibly so I inquired. Her father had been killed in a car accident when she was young and he loved Pink Floyd. I agreed it was a great song and album, and that the sentiment resonated with my feelings as well. As we became acquainted, I learned she was a Christian and between Sophomore and Junior years at WVU, interested in digital/social marketing for the fashion or sports gear industries. Her brother had leukemia, but was currently cancer free. Amazingly, I was there for quite a long time and we discussed all sorts of faith-related matters, including aspects of Christian Apologetics. I was impressed by her depth of belief and greatly appreciated her analogy of Creation as to a car - “if you encountered a car, would you think all the various parts created themselves and somehow managed to be put together into the form of a functioning vehicle?!” I used her bit several weeks later in conversation with an Atheist couple from NorCal in Yellowstone, but more on that in a future post. 😏

She recommended the dill based flatbread that was delicious - housemade garlic oil, cheddar, mozzarella, dill, pickles, bacon, fresh dill, and a ranch drizzle and I ended up buying a number of crowler’s of some heavyweight libations which I took back to the AS - it looked like motor oil so good thing I later shared it with friends in Detroit. 🥴

Chef Devon joined in the conversation as well and we chatted a bit about the quasi-nomad life seeing as he’d been in seasonal food service gigs in Alaska, Montana & Steamboat Springs among other locales - interesting!

Mon (07.13) - OH, MI

Needed to hit the road but Coach Tony Dungy had something to say… in his “One Year Uncommon Life…” - Mistaken Identity

“What is the price of two sparrows-one copper coin? But not a single sparrow can fall to the around without your Father knowing it. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don’t be afraid: you are more valuable to God than a whole flock of sparrows.” MATTHEW 10:29-31

“Children have a lot of dreams. Some want to be pro athletes, or Olympic gold medal winners, or famous singers or actors, or maybe great inventors or explorers. Some want to make lots of money, or live in big houses, or have more cars than they can drive at one time. They often have great dreams, but most of those dreams are related to doing, not being.

They aren’t focused on who they should be on the inside — their values and priorities - even though those inner attributes affect everything else. Who they are will shape everything they do.

In our society, this struggle between being and doing starts early and is often innocently encouraged. We ask our children what they want to be when they grow up much more often than we ask them what kind of person they want to be. And when we say, “What do you want to be?” they know what we really mean: “What job do you want to have?” It’s a focus on what they do rather than who they are. And most will spend their lives identifying themselves by what they do.

I never heard Chuck Noll (former NFL coaching great) act as if his value as a person was lessened when we lost a game. He was the same person whether we were winning or losing because his self-esteem didn’t depend on what he accomplished. And when he retired from football, he didn’t lose his identity because his identity was based on something deeper than being a coach. His job didn’t define who he was.

That’s a great example. The most important thing about you is who you are, not what you do. You may think you’ll be satisfied when you accomplish your goals or fulfill the role you’ve dreamed about, but if you have an unsatisfied heart now, outward accomplishments won’t change a thing. Know who you are on the inside and what God has done to make you who you are. That’s where your identity comes from.

UNCOMMON KEY > Who you are is not a vocational question. Your identity is defined by the God who made you, and it doesn’t change with circumstances. Remind yourself to not get so caught up in “doing” that you forget about “being.””

(C) 2011 Tony Dungy

I left Steve & Mary’s in W. PA and stopped for gas at Costco west of Cleveland (Avon) yet there was a car too close to where I needed to pull in and I couldn’t swing wide enough to enter the lane, clipping the curb, which destroyed the sidewall of my front right AS tire. 🤬 Fortunately, it was one of the original tires that came with the trailer and NOT the one I’d had to replace the previous year! 🙌🏻 Costco unfortunately could not help me with that type of tire but they recommended Discount Tire only 1.5mi away so I was able limp over there without having to jack up the trailer, remove the tire, swap to the spare, etc. These are all tasks I initially envisioned having to perform solo in the Costco parking lot… Travis at Discount Tire initially took my call and upon my explanation of the situation and my desire to get to Toledo to meet an old friend ASAP (appointment scheduled an hour from then), stated they had tires in stock and could squeeze me right in! Upon my arrival Seamus handled the majority of the efforts but Supervisor Will took an active interest as well. In speaking with them one mentioned their Stepdad was diagnosed with leukemia right before they were supposed to go on a trip and only lasted two weeks so he said that his Mom was trying to live life to the fullest… 🙏🏻 I inquired about the OTHER 2 tires, having observed some cracks in the sidewalls, seeking to avoid additional problems down the road. They showed me that the tires were actually manufactured in 2016 so were 10 years old which was rather frightening given the trailer was a 2019 and I bought it in 2022?! The shop fortunately had additional tires in stock and were able to replace all three tires for a decent price in only half an hour without me having to detach the trailer - talk about a blessing in disguise! 💜 I was THRILLED to have it all accomplished and only be 30 minutes late to visit my classmate in Toledo. Seamus even helped me back out of their lot, clearing my tail so I could depart safely. #GreatTeamwork

Fortunately my friend Rasheed had no problem with my schedule slippage and he, his son Alexander & I had a wide-ranging enjoyable conversation over a late breakfast at a truck stop just off the highway that was quite decent! I believe we’d had some Engineering classes together at Annapolis and remained in touch over the Class of ’88 Facebook page yet but I could not honestly recall when we’d last met F2F, presumably at one of our reunions. I’d recalled that he was from the Seattle area yet hadn’t realized he’d relocated to the Ft Wayne, IN area until he reached out to me near the start go my trip, expressing a desire to connect during my travels.

As is often sadly the case, I learned he’d been through quite a few hardships over the past few years and was in the midst of “starting over” - something I knew a bit too well. Based on some prior dialogs I’d suspected he was Muslim yet he’d expressed some interest in how my life had changed over the years, and my increased investment in my Christian faith. I learned he was raised Muslim but was not really “practicing” and we spoke at length about differences between Islam and Christianity, different Christian denominations, and in the larger context, the misguided nature of so many faiths that are “works-based,” verses how Jesus taught, that it was impossible to keep the 10 Commandments in our hearts which was why He came to earth & ultimately the free gift of salvation He offers. We of course also talked about people who claimed to be Christian yet do not seem to live in a manner that reflects that and again one of my fave analogies from John Dixon’s “Bullies & Saints” - essentially, “who is to blame when a musician plays Mozart poorly - the Creator of the Message or those delivering the message poorly?”

We also chatted about different places we’ve worked and management styles we’ve encountered in organizations large & small. He posed the phrase “mediocre companies,” which I found intriguing. He clarified in his experience those organizations don’t outwardly “aspire to be” mediocre but based on how they behave it seems that they are satisfied with success at a much lower level than he and frankly, I had been satisfied, confident that the potential was so much more. This resonated deeply with my experience. We also shared the successes we’ve had in building teams in such situations, trying to push the organization towards their potential, yet encountering resistance…

Near the end of our visit I asked if he’d read the Bible and he’d not, yet was willing to accept the last paperback copy I had of the Gospel of John. At another point in our chat I inquired as to whether he was aware of Nabeel Qureshi but he was not familiar. I later decided to send him one of Nabeel’s books I’d read, “Seeking Allah, Finding Jesus” because I’d found it fascinating.

That night I made it to White Lake, Michigan a suburb of Detroit. My oldest’s daughter Katie had suggested I reach out the brother of one of her best friends since High School who’d been a Blackhawk driver in the Army (H-60, the original variant of what I flew in the Navy SH-60F/HH-60H) and was currently a Delta Airlines pilot. Their Dad Dale was visiting with his RV and they welcomed me crashing in their driveway with open arms! Dale expertly guided me into their driveway next too his “Rig” and during my set-up we chatted for a while to get to know each other and he shared a number of insights based on his extensive time RV’ing over the last few years in different parts of the country. He strongly recommended “Harvest Hosts” which Kath & I had used a few times and said he spent a long time in Florida using that alone & then simply dumping his tanks at State Parks for a small fee. This has became my primary “modus operandi” since that meeting!

After competing set-up I headed over to Wixom, MI to meet with my long-time work colleague David and his lovely & engaging wife Jessica. We caught up and discussed a wide range of topics: family, Faith, our travels and then had an engaging dinner at one of their favorite local Mexican restaurants, Mexican Fiesta #4. We had such wonderful young Christian women serving us, and given that we arrived kinda late (this is ME we’re talking about - never missing an opportunity to socialize…) the dinner crowd had died down and Emily & Rachel, both Michigan State students & co-owner LG (Little Gloria) were able to spend a fair amount of time visiting with us while we ate. These young women were ON FIRE for the Lord - it was soooo encouraging and each shared numerous stories of things God has done in our lives and even prayed for us before we left! They invited me to join them at their church, “The Commons”in East Lansing, if I was going to be in town that next Sunday. In hindsight, I wish I’d been able…

All in all a busy week but as much as I appreciated my time in the NE, I was glad to finally be making it West…

Next up: loads of stuff in Michigan: both “the Mitten” and the “UP” (Upper Peninsula).

Wed (07.01) As I alluded at the tail end of the last post, I discovered how close I was to the start of the American Revolution on the cusp of our 250th so how could I not take some time to revisit Minuteman National Historical Park at Lexington & Concord, MA?! https://www.nps.gov/mima/learn/historyculture/the-minute-man-statue-by-daniel-chester-french.htm I spent far more time there than I’d anticipated, having only made a brief trip with the Fam some 20 yrs ago and ended up walking ~5 miles in and around the park, including part of the “battle road” that was the retreat path of the Brits back towards Boston with the Colonial militia chasing and picking them off on the way. Interestingly enough, the famed Minuteman statue was dedicated in 1875 after a local young man won the competition to develop it, having used descendants of Captain Isaac Davis, one of the two Colonists killed at the North bridge as the model. Further, some of CAPT Davis’ actual gear was also used for the statue modeling, and it was cast from two Civil War cannons that had been melted down. One might recognize that this statue is the symbol of the National Guard. Inscribed on the base of the statue is the first stanza of “the Concord Hymn,” by Ralph Waldo Emerson:

“BY THE RUDE BRIDGE THAT

ARCHED THE FLOOD,

THEIR FLAG TO APRIL’S

BREEZE UNFURLED,

HERE ONCE THE EMBATTLED

FARMERS STOOD,

AND FIRED THE SHOT HEARD

ROUND THE WORLD.”

After departing Concord, MA I made my way to my Cousin Robin’s on my Dad’s side in Concord, NH, in the daylight this time! However, feeling pressure from the traffic on the street to “get into her driveway already” I ended up jack-knifing and smashing one of the Tundra’s taillights against the Airstream (sorry Kath!) 🤬

Robin’s Bro Andy joined us at a local brewery and wouldntcha know they were having a special party for the U.S. World Cup game - who doesn’t like hot dogs? 😀

Thurs (07.02) I’d yet to need to use the HVAC units on the AS until arriving in NH but thankfully I had enough juice to run one of them! After morning devotionals I had a session over FaceTime with my Counselor back home and it was helpful to talk about some of my feelings over the past month. A recurring theme has been dealing with having been used to being “productive,” as the world defines it, as opposed to now. A huge part of this excursion was to be able to take the time to truly heal from all scenarios over the years, but I regularly need to remind myself I cannot “rush” this process. I’ve come to realize that in the past there was much in which I was involved that was “productive” in ways the world identities, yet was not truly beneficial to others or in building God’s kingdom. I’m learning to live/wrestle with what I think I “ought to do” vs. walking with God moment by moment. Rather than lamenting what coulda/woulda/shoulda been done - regardless of whether it feels “productive,” it’s helpful to ask, is it glorifying God? 🙌🏻

Shifting gears, I had been dealing with a painful shoulder for most of my journey and was concerned about it possibly being something “serious” yet had been waiting to be able to find a VA clinic that could take “walk-in” appointments and had discovered there was one in Manchester, NH. In parallel, Robin had pointed me to a few Toyota dealers that might have a replacement taillight and it just so happened I drove by one of them on the way to the VA! I slid in there and was able to buy a replacement taillight for my 8 year old truck which they thankfully had in stock because they supply a number of body shops. Even better, they were able to schedule a service appointment for the very next day to check the Tundra’s brakes because I’d been experiencing some very uncomfortable “shuddering” while managing the rollercoasters of PA & NY state highways which I’d found surprising given I’d had the truck’s brakes checked prior to departing SPT. I was impressed they were able to get me in just before the holiday because I was planning on departing NH for Acadia on Monday.

Hitting the VA Urgent Care in Manchester was a great experience, seriously! I had to re-submit all my info because my Primary Care team is in a different region but after that, the triage Nurse was super friendly, efficient and I didn’t have to wait too long for an x-ray. I engaged with Suzi in Radiology check-in, who asked about the “Parting Waves Surf Co.” t-shirt I was wearing. One might have to look closely but it depicts Moses parting the Red Sea by holding up a pair of surfboards. 😉 As we spoke I showed her my tattoo, shared about Kath & Kenzie and it turned out she’d lost her daughter at 15 due to a heart condition. She became a little teary but was also encouraged and appreciative that we had the chat.🙌🏻

After the doctor shared the X-Ray confirmed nothing serious I was able to see the PT who demo’d some strengthening exercises and prescribed some pain reducing topical cream. I bopped on down to the pharmacy and while waiting met an old Army guy there, probably ‘Nam era. He had several tattoos and upon observation of the one on my leg of Naval Aviator’s wings correctly assumed I’d been a pilot. We chatted for while about flying as he was a Cobra (AH-1 attack helo) guy like my cousin on the Jones side, Dana. Then I shared the meaning of my NEW tattoo & what I’m doing on this trek around the country. It seemed to make an impression on him and he thanked me for sharing. Upon return to Robin’s I had to remove the bike & kayak from the Tundra in order to put truck on the rack for service the next day. I am certainly improving at removing and reinstalling the boat solo… On a less pleasant note, it was hotter than heck in NH that week so I ended up learning a few things about the power consumption of various systems aboard the AS, the ratings of extension cords (so much for EE @ USNA) , and ahhh, melted what I thought was an adequate outdoor extension cord while tripping the circuit breaker to Robin’s home. I’d used that cord plenty of times previously but clearly the power draw coupled with the extreme heat proved woefully inadequate! 😳 The good news is now I have a properly rated heavy duty extension cord!

Fri (07.03) - I had a GREAT breakfast scramble with Robin at the Red Arrow Diner after which we dropped the Tundra at McGovern Toyota in Bow, NH where Sean S. led the team that expeditiously troubleshot the brake “shuddering” as a seized front caliper which of course had damaged the rotor, necessitating the replacement of both. Naturally if replacing the rotor & pads on one side, the other side ought to be accomplished as well. I used to do the brakes on my own cars long ago so was rather familiar with the process and materials involved so given the effort and the fact that I would need to do the rear brakes “at some point,” in the somewhat near future it seemed logical to simply knock them out all at once. I sincerely appreciated being able to look at the truck on the rack and speak to the technician performing the work. Sean and I chatted a bit about sports, family and Faith, what I was doing on this trek and he certainly understood - it was very encouraging as well.

Upon completion of the Tundra service we attempted to visit the Statehouse in Concord which was unfortunately closed but thankfully found Pitchfork Records for some used CDs! (Yes, I am still a “physical media” guy.)

A bit later we were able to connect with Cousin Mary Jane and her hubby Marty (my first time meeting him) at Northwoods Brewing for a monster tray of nachos and umm, some brewskis. 😎 It was great to catch up - MJ has a very interesting family history, somewhat recently discovering she’d had a half brother in Germany since after WWII- she wrote a book about THAT one!

It occurred to me that seeing as it would’ve been my Dad’s 88th birthday and he was born in Concord, perhaps I could locate the home in which he was born. However, after contacting my Mom I discovered the street name had been changed from Fremont to Federal St, yet the house number didn’t seem to exist. Cousin Robin suggested they likely renumbered the houses when changing the street name so my bother Jason was able to find the “new address” enabling me to slide on by…

That night we went to the New Hampshire Veteran’s Cemetery and another one of my cousins who’s a trumpeter, Robin’s oldest bro Jeff, played Taps - it was moving. The cemetery is very well crafted, with a significant number of special monuments dedicated by a broad variety of groups across all the conflicts represented. We also visited my Dad’s Uncle Walter Jones’s gravestone. He was a WW2 POW in Germany who fortunately came home. I was fortunately able to meet him when my Dad brought me to the Northeast to visit his family on my 1st plane trip at the end of 6th grade - the summer of ‘78, I think.

Afterwards Robin and I weren’t exactly ready to call it a night so she took me to the graves of my Dad’s parents, Carl & Jeannette (Jones) in the Concord cemetery where there also is a memorial to Christa McAuliffe, the local NH teacher that sadly perished in the Space Shuttle Challenger mishap in ’86. I’d visited once before yet I hadn’t realized there were older family graves listed on the other side of the main family headstone including one who fought in the NH Volunteers in the Civil War & eventually became a minster?! Afterwards we closed down a cool local brewery “Feathered Friends” and then yours truly sorta had a hankering for some pizza so I dragged Robin on another late night - she has the patience of a saint, at least with me! 😎

Sat (07.04) the message from the devotional calendar provided by Kath’s Aunt Nancy, You’ll Get Through This based on Max Lucado’s works was especially poignant:

“Compared to eternity, what is seventy, eighty, ninety years?

Just a vapor. Just a finger snap compared to heaven.

Your pain won’t last forever, but you will.” Amen!

Robin and I attended the 250th commemoration of July 4th starting with a parade in downtown Concord, perused the Farmer’s Market next to the Statehouse, listened to the speeches by local leaders which were gratefully patriotic and not especially “political,” and the reading of the Declaration. A New Hampshire group of the Sons of the American Revolution fired a barrage of muskets and some Civil War re-enactors fired a wonderfully maintained cannon after the reading. It was sooo beautifully shiny all I could think of was the effort with Brasso to get it there! We then toured the Concord Statehouse, the oldest in the country wherein the Legislature still regularly meets.

Especially cool was that they had the ORIGINAL copy of the Declaration that was sent to NH ~a week after July 4th & read publicly. They only display it for a few days and apparently it was discovered in somebody’s attic in the mid 1980s! Above it hung a picture of the NH signer, Josiah Bartlett, which some might recognize as the namesake of the fictional President from NH depicted in the TV series “The West Wing.”

I mentioned the day prior I’d discovered one of our “Jones” relatives fought for the New Hampshire 12th Volunteers in the Civil War and while in the rotunda of the State House I noted there were four Battle flags from that 12th Regiment that fought in the actual battles listed on a plaque accompanying them - kinda cool.

Afterwards we went to lunch at Smokeshow barbecue attached to Feathered Friends brewery that we’d hit the night prior and had a fabulous dish called “Goodness” which was chopped brisket, chopped turkey, and pulled pork all mixed together in a local barbecue sauce. Mmmmm

That evening we went to dinner with Robin’s bros Dudley, Jeff & Andy with their wives Marilyn & Gerri, respectively. While we didn’t really have a Faith oriented conversation, I asked if I could say a blessing before the meal which seemed to be apprecitated. It turned out to be Jeff’s birthday the next day so we all shared a massive ice cream sundae and sang him “Happy Birthday.” Even though most of them all live within a few miles of each other, where they grew up, it was mentioned that they didn’t get together too often unless someone like me comes to town, yet they genuinely enjoy each other’s company and catching up on old times. I realized that they have led far different lives than me - none of my family lives where we grew up and my oldest daughter Katie’s family and I are the only ones in the East. I’d planned to go to bed early but realized the Freedom250 celebration in DC was going to be on TV yet had been delayed by weather so I started catching up on journaling and didn’t end up hitting the rack until after two. 🙄

Sun (07.05) - attended GateCity Church in Nashua, NH with Greg C & his delightful wife Karen. G-man is an old colleague with whom I worked at Intel when I relo’d to MD in the early 2000s and lives in the area. Greg & Karen had hosted me many years previously when I was going through my divorce and took me to my first real non-denominational Christian service which made an impact on me, yet for which I wasn’t quite ready at the time. Looking back, it set the stage for what I came to understand as the far simpler and more straight-forward Biblical messages than the denominational complexity to which I’d been accustomed. It was great to be back with friends of faith and hearing a clear message, just as if I’d been back home at Generations in SPT.

Pastor Paul was in week 4 of a series entitled “Laying out the Biblical foundations:”

1. Repentance from dead works

2. Faith towards God (the assurance of those things yet unseen.)

3. Instructions about Washings / Baptisms

4. Laying on of Hands -> an act in which one person places his hands upon another for prayer, blessing or impartation.

5. Resurrection of the Dead

6. Eternal Judgment”

It was interesting because I’d honestly not thought too much about the practice of “laying on of hands” yet came to realize “Jesus met people at their point of need & touched. Further, He told us to do so. There are numerous examples in the book of Acts (of the Apostles):

1. While praying for the sick

2. While praying for believers to receive the Holy Spirit

3. For the impartation of Spiritual Gifts

4. In the sending forth of ministries

5. In the ordination of church leaders

6. For blessing & dedicating Children”

The Pastor recollected that a Chaplain in the USAF told him: “Our job is to pray for people, God’s is to decide to heal,” so we are to GO when & where called, asking God to meet us at our point of need.” Amen. 🙏🏻

Afterwards I joined G & K for lunch at Odd Fellows brewery in Nashua and had a great visit catching up on Faith, family and trailer camping experiences. G-man is quite the techie and explained in detail how he’d re-architected their trailer for solar with a significant Lithium Ion battery subsystem for max endurance while “boondocking.” He’s super smart and was geekin’ out over the Inverter he’d installed/configured and all the Amp-hours at their disposal. Guess I’m kinda lazy - I simply look for places with shore power. 😏

Mon (07.06) Once again Max Lucado’s You’ll Get a Through This hit home:

“What is coming will make sense of what is happening now. Let God finish his work.Let the composer complete his symphony.”

I had a good counseling session with my Hospice Grief Counselor Leon while finishing buttoning up the AS to depart Conord, NH for Acadia National Park in Maine. On the way I stopped by Northwoods Brewing (NH) again for breakfast (heh heh) because I saw I was driving right past there on the way to Acadia and remembered they had a bakery as well (no, I wasn’t drinking YET). I bought some tasty treats - a savory scone (spinach and feta) and maple bourbon cruller that was simply amazing - tremendously fluffy almost like a semi-sweet pop-over inside. I used to love Crullers but hadn’t seen one in a while. Of course a 4 can “build your own” beer pack ended up in my bag as well. 😎 Katherine served me and & commented on my “Jesus - Highway to Heaven” T-shirt that has the appearance of the logo for the rock band AC/DC and we ended up talking for a little while about different kinds of similar shirts that catch attention and deliver a message of worth. I conveyed descriptions of a few others I have, then shared my new tattoo and the nature of my trip - it was a good visit & she agreed to a pic. I wished I’d had that “dot” device on my phone that I’d bought on Erin’s recommendation yet it was waiting for me back at Mary’s in W. PA, but I planned to pick it up when passing back through there the next week.

As I was eating my cruller in the parking lot, there was another couple there with their own trailer and they walked up to ask about my Airstream. I asked them if they wanted a tour and they were ecstatic - a young family from outside Concord. Something for which to strive?

I then set my sights on the Maine Beer Company Kath & I visited on our Honeymoon in August 2015 and saw that they’d expanded tremendously! As I was walking in, a few kids sitting with their family saw my “Jesus - Highway to Heaven” T-shirt and shouted how great they thought it was! I asked if they wanted a picture so they cajoled their Dad into doing so.

I had a flight of MBC’s excellent beers but their Flagship IPA “Lunch” (named after a Humpback Whale of the same name) is still my Fave. I made my way to the L.L. Bean flagship outlet stores, another stop on our honeymoon, visiting all the stores yet didn’t find many good deals aside from some new grips for my bike which were sorely needed.

Sadly I didn’t get into the Bar Harbor Oceanside KOA campground until 930PM and the spots were kinda tight - I had some trouble parking but the guy across the way helped guide me in. Where’s an LSE (Landing Signalman Enlisted - from my Navy flying days) when you need one? I set up the basics for my site and settled in to watch the replay of the US - Belgium soccer game and didn’t hit the rack till about 1:30…

Tues (07.07) my first day in Acadia to which I was looking forward yet was also a bit apprehensive as I’d been there twice previously, both with Kath. The musical devotional by The Worship Initiative - Sing, was a good one, the song Indescribable with longtime popular CCM (Contemporary Christian Music) artist Laura Story. https://sing.theworshipinitiative.com/series/daily/2026-07-07?ref_user=504c6f1f-43e6-449f-8a9b-a99f3a14f757

Laura shared her expierience with her husband’s brain injury and conveyed this prayer: “God’s plan is bigger than what I can see right now. Let what I can see build my faith for what I CAN’T see!” Thank you Lord for making yourself available & approachable through your son Jesus!”

Tony Dungy’s One Year Uncommon Life Daily Challenge devotional was entitled “Preparation for the Battlefield,” and addressed temptation, based on Matthew 6:22-23:

“Your eye is a lamp that provides light for your body. When your eye is good, your whole body is filled with light. But when your eye is bad, your whole body is filled with darkness.”

This was interesting because as I was mentally preparing for this voyage I realized I was emotionally vulnerable and likely to be presented with temptations along the way that if entertained, would attempt to drag me away from my new life in Jesus. This had happened previously, a few years ago and I recognized I liked “the new me” far better than “the old” and had to make some decisions about where, how, and with whom to spend my time.

Coach D conveyed: “Whatever is evil, vengeful, lustful, tempting, or otherwise ungodly tends to stick in our minds or hearts and grow. This applies to all kinds of inappropriate thoughts—anger, bitterness, vengeance, jealousy, criticism, negativity, and on and on. We need to be vigilant not to let that happen. How am I allowing myself to be tempted? We have to protect our own minds and the minds of our kids. It often begins with those “small things” chipping away at the boundaries we should keep.

The best way to protect those boundaries is to pray early and often. Whenever you sense an inappropriate thought forming, ask God to take it from you and cleanse your mind of it. Envision your mind and your heart as God’s treasured territory, and do whatever it takes to protect that territory. Whenever you’re confronted with an impure thought, reject it and replace it with something much more positive. Redirect (your) thoughts and discipline themselves in truth. Whatever it takes, prevent infiltration.” Amen!

Heading into Acadia, I hiked around Cadillac Mountain, which yielded amazing views and I simply love the pink granite of which the mountain is largely made.

Then again, the two times prior she was there… Time to do something else - a 16mi bike ride on the Carriage Trails up to Day Mountain with a great view of the islands to the SW, around Bubble Pond, Eagle Lake & ending back at the southern tip of Jordan Pond. Kath enjoyed biking the Carriage Trails but would NOT have enjoyed THAT ride! 🤣

My NH bud Greg has suggested Abel’s Lobster Pound which did not disappoint - a beautiful sunset over the water, but I was freezing after the bike ride and needed to pull on fleece and even put on the zip-up pant legs of the convertible camp-pants I was wearing (my girls LOVE those zip-off pants - NOT). There wasn’t really a counter at which to sit so I ended up at a table by myself outside and as I felt that time at the brewery on Seneca Lake, everybody else was there with somebody so even though the food was great and it was a beautiful sunset, it was kinda lonely. I chatted a bit with my server Sandy - she saw the picture of Reed pop-up on my phone and mentioned she had a seven year-old boy. She’d lost her father before she was married so we talked about the brevity of life and she indicated she regretted not getting married sooner so her Dad could’ve walked her down the aisle. Sadly, I neglected to mention Jesus when I likely had the opportunity, but it was late - once again closing a place down, I was tired, kinda lonely and simply didn’t think about it til after she walked off. 😥

Next up - further exploration of Acadia, more #BarstoolEvangelism, reconnecting with some old friends from SPT, and back to Western PA before finally heading West!

Tues (06.23) evening I landed at the home of our dear friends and longtime next-door neighbors in Mt Airy, MD Steve & Mary T - a beautifully scenic farmette in Western PA, ~30 mins from the Ohio border and an hour or so from PGH (Pittsburgh). I glamped in one of their pastures next to their 5 cows and amongst the chickens, led by Chuckie the psycho attack rooster. Practically every evening there delivered a beautiful sunset!

Wed (06.24) Mary whipped up an excellent batch of chow with their fresh eggs but as we sat and talked on the back porch I simply felt “off,” like I thought it would feel “better” to be around such close friends with whom we’d experienced so much life together, almost a shared family, and yet somehow I did not, but sorrowful because “Kathy should’ve been here” - she was here the last time I was so I guess I should’ve expected it. I also think neglecting to start the day with my devotionals contributed to getting off on the wrong foot. I did a few loads of laundry and Mary beat me to folding the second batch - thanks Hon!

Steve and his buddy Mike performed a phenomenally huuuuge assist to me by repairing the rear bumper and storage compartment of the AS that I’d unfortunately wrecked in MD during an inelegant landing at the second farm at which I’d stayed. I believe I left this mishap out of the week 1 posting but suffice it to say I was convinced I’d be forced to order a new bumper from Airstream and have it shipped to a future stop to replace (~$1k). But those creative farmer boyz found an old skool approach using Steve’s tractor and a few other tools I never envisioned could be put to THAT use! At least I was able to contribute in developing a new method for restoring the latching mechanism for the bumper’s storage compartment.

I joined Steve for his meeting at the local VFW and after a little cajoling agreed to switch my lifetime VFW membership from my original Post in MD to their Post in PA. I’d never bothered to switch to SPT, having only hit a local VFW once since moving to NC and had no idea as to the location of my membership card so one of the ole’timers made me a new ID card to enable easy access across the rest of the country. While my buddy attended to VFW business I spent time getting to know a few locals and in particular, Mike the bartender, recently discharged from the USMC and enrolled in college. He’d been stationed in Japan and also spent some time in S. Korea. Something that stuck with me was the comment he made about the racism he experienced in S Korea, as a “part-Korean,” something he’d never felt in the inclusive melting pot of the U.S. - everyone here is from somewhere! Upon returning to the farm, psycho rooster Chuckie attacked me, drawing blood, even though I worked to avoid getting between him and “his” hens, and tried to kick him away as advised. I learned one needed to carry a baseball bat or rake whenever near him!

Thurs (06.25) I resumed my devotionals which put me in a better mood. Especially poignant was the one from The Worship Initiative, an org that conducts a musical devotional M-F each week called “Sing.” The one I did was entitled “Thank You Jesus for the Blood,” https://sing.theworshipinitiative.com/series/daily/2026-06-25?ref_user=504c6f1f-43e6-449f-8a9b-a99f3a14f757 based on Ephesians 2:1-9:

“Once you were dead because of your disobedience and your many sins. You used to live in sin, just like the rest of the world, obeying the devil—the commander of the powers in the unseen world. He is the spirit at work in the hearts of those who refuse to obey God. All of us used to live that way, following the passionate desires and inclinations of our sinful nature. By our very nature we were subject to God’s anger, just like everyone else.

But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus. So God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of his grace and kindness toward us, as shown in all he has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus.

God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it.”

In closing I prayed that the Lord would help me to see the people around me with compassion, for they are made in His image. Especially those who do not know Him, and for boldness to share with others. As I was working through it, having been missing Kath, I was trying to remind myself of the blessings I have now, rather than those which I have no longer. I couldn’t help but remember the darkness in which I dwelled after MacKenzie died. I was living in sinful reckless behavior & it only made me feel worse: drinking myself to force sleep and the various relationships that made me feel uncomfortable.

BUT GOD - led me to Kathy, who though she never pushed, helped me see the need and more importantly THE REASON to change - Christ’s sacrifice for us both. Thank God I am no longer a slave to the guilt & shame!

That day it rained off and on but on the second attempt Steve & I had a GREAT day at the shooting range! 9mm, .45, AR (5.56mm) & 20G. He focused on teaching me body mechanics and tactics for engagement of adversaries, more than simply “aiming and shooting.” Fundamentals the way they teach them in the Army for close order combat - “train like you (expect) to fight” - it was very productive and encouraging as we sadly never formally conducted firearms training in the Navy after establishing initial competence. When flying in the Gulf in the ‘90s we carried .45 1911 handguns on which I’d qualified at the Academy in ’84 but I do not recall a single instance of re-establishing that competency. I’m sure that’s no longer the case!

Fri (06.26) My opening devotional each day along this trek has typically been Max Lucado’s daily calendar You’ll Get through This from Kathy’s dear Aunt Nancy. Today’s was Psalm 138:8 - “The Lord will work out His plans for my life.” Then I often do Our Daily Bread and Tony Dungy’s The One Year Uncommon Life Daily Challenge. I mentioned this latter book in the last post, and how I shared a copy with a man I met. The entry for today was entitled “The Promise of a New Day” and addressed the topic of Coach Dungy being at a major crossroads in his life - leaving the NFL as a player and his ensuing confusion. The way he put it:

“I had always played football, and now that seemed to be over.... I knew God was in control and had a plan, yet for the first time I didn’t know what it was. Little did I know that God had 28 years of football coaching in store for me.”

Coach D suggested writing “God has it Covered” at the top of your calendar for the next few days so I’ve been doing it everyday since!

Steve T provided some tips that accelerated my efforts to strip the decaying seal for the screen door on my AS - gasoline! :) While the family was preparing for Luke’s wedding rehearsal later that evening I tackled the 14+ mi trail at Maurice Goddard State Park around Lake Wilhelm. It was a GREAT ride - a superbly paved path yet VERY hilly, though the picture below doesn’t adequately depict...

I was pretty smoked afterwards but scooted back to the AS to clean up for the rehearsal dinner and reconnect with many of the extended T fam. I had been trying to steel myself for this wedding, anticipating a wonderful event to be sure, but the first one without Kath, for a young man to whom she was quite close. A tearfully moving moment for me was hearing Bethel Music’s “Goodness of God” while

Luke’s betrothed, Courtney walked down the aisle. One of the two songs Kath had picked for her Living Tribute on March 9th, surely no coincidence - God was trying to remind me of what Kath knew to be true.

Sat (06.27) I took the down time prior to the wedding to finally get around to moving all the content off Kathy’s iPhone and in so doing stumbled across some notes from a session she had with her Counselor at some point in 2025 which I found discouraging. The devotional from Our Daily Bread entitled “One Sure Thing” asked the following questions in bold followed by my answers:

“What frightens you?” Its not so much frightening this AM as it was discouragement - that upon reading Kathy’s notes from Counseling, that perhaps the one that I loved the most here on earth, I was still disappointing, even though I had felt that I had improved in those areas and continued to try.

“How does Jesus’ power over the world encourage you to pray and rest in Him?” Because of Jesus‘s power over the world I know that Kathy, like all people, was human and as such had strengths and weaknesses, was right and wrong about things, but yet in totality, I do believe that she loved me and that I did the very best I could for her. Thank you, Jesus and heaven truly does change everything.

In listening to “The Message” on SiriusXM satellite radio as I usually do. The morning host, Doug Hannah, shared a few comments as he often does amidst the music played, that aligned with the feelings present:

“Knowing facts about God isn’t the same thing as KNOWING God and it’s certainly not the same thing as TRUSTING Him.”

“Every day is a gift from God, even the ones that leave their scars.”

The wedding that afternoon was wonderful, the procession song ended up being another of Kathy’s faves, Brandon Lake’s “Gratitude,” since first hearing it in a Christmas special from the series “The Chosen” a few years ago:

The message Pastor Ben Z delivered was perhaps the best wedding message I’d ever heard. I recorded it in it’s entirely and am glad I did. I believe my union with Kathy had contained much of what he presented but I plan to revisit the video when I want to be reminded what a Godly marriage looks like.

The reception afforded opportunities for me to reconnect with many members of the extended T Fam, quite a few whom I’d only met briefly in the past. In each conversation I was intentional in my messaging: making the most of the time granted in the relationships that matter.

Sun (06.28) Getting ready for church I was listening to “The Climb” a “count-up” radio show on SiriusXM’s “The Message” station and heard number of songs that have been encouraging me lately:

“Days God Gave” Matt Hammitt

“Ain’t No Way” - Jamie MacDonald

and “Father Let It Be” - Sidewalk Prophets

At Oak Grove Church Pastor Ben (whom officiated the wedding the day prior) again nailed it with a comprehensive review of Jesus’s “Sermon on the Mount,” laid out in Matthew 5 https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew%205&version=NLT, and sometimes referred to as “The Beatitudes,” quoting Chuck Swindoll: “The Beatitudes are a checklist for lasting joy.” I spent the rest of Sunday packing up the AS to head out the next AM.

Mon (06.29) I planned to surprise Ma Z (June, Kathy’s Mom) at Andy & Terry’s place back in the Poconos and had heard the “Pennsylvania Grand Canyon” was worth visiting so pursued a beautiful drive on US 62 and eventually to Route 6 snaking along the Allegheny river up to Leonard Harrison State Park near Wellsboro, PA. I tackled the 2mi round trip hike thinking I’d knock it out and scoot on over to Lake Ariel but it toured out to be rather steep (~800’ elevation change each way) so it took a little longer than a 2mi hike ought, and was a good workout. Kathy would NOT have appreciated that one!

After departing the “Grand Canyon” I landed at the KOA at which I’d previously stayed in the area (Honesdale) ~1845 (645PM), almost forgetting how tough the PA backroads were, in terms of steepness, curves & of course…potholes. I quickly dropped the AS and made it over to the house to surprise Ma just before 8. They’d made a wonderful Chicken Marsala dinner and we were able to visit for a few hours, getting back to the trailer by ~11.

Tues (06.30) I finally left PA and drove across NY to MA in order to meet with up with a few old friends which I’d not seen in some time. The crazy backcountry roads continued - very hilly in PA, which didn’t seem quite as bad moving into NY and while a little less “potholey,” that’s not saying much. As I passed through Bethel, NY I drove past a farm with a big sign with “Yasgur” on the side. I seemed to recall it was Max Yasgur’s farm where the 1969 Woodstock Festival festival was held.

While driving, unlike Kathy I’m not too big on “silence” and have developed a pattern of listening to Sirius/XM’s “The Message” Contemporary Christian Music (CCM) channel for encouragement and then switching over to the Harry Potter Audio book series or a podcast. While listening to the former I always pick up a few valuable nuggets from the host of the program. This one by Doug Hannah felt especially important to share:

“If feeling guilty it is likely from one of two sources:

• Either we’re actively living in sin, we know it & are unwilling to change

• We feel it’s too much to overcome (or from which we can be forgiven)

In either case, we need Jesus!” Referencing Romans 8:1: “So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.“ I had specifically read Romans 8 in its entirety at Kathy’s internment.

As I drove, a few songs especially spoke to me: “Come What May” by We Are Messengers, which starts out with: “Sometimes sorrow is the door to peace…”

And “Lift Me Up” by Blessing Offor

Having recently offloaded everything from Kathy’s iPhone I attempted to reach Verizon to disconnect her line but I wanted to SPEAK with someone which naturally seemed a difficult option to pursue. However, after being disconnected a few times while on hold due to reception I was finally able to speak with a very helpful woman who’s name I sadly neglected to capture but in sharing my reasons for disconnecting the line I noted a few words of compassion that gave me the feeling I could suggest a faith-based comment relating to Romans 8:28, in effect: “And we know that God works all things for the good of those who love God and are called to His purposes” and that while the individual things that happen may not be good, in totality everything will work out for good, to which the woman responded quite emphatically and we had an encouraging conversation - with a random Verizon rep while traveling through the NY mountains!

During the drive I discovered that a Cousin on my Mom’s side, Suzi had very recently passed away, also from Cancer and I felt terrible because I couldn’t recall the last time we’d met and I hadn’t even realized she was sick! This lead me to immediately reach out to her brother Matt with whom I have been in fairly regular communication but naturally my dealing with Kathy’s illness seemed to have prevented much recent dialog. Regardless of the circumstances it was great to catch up with such a strong man of faith and ONCE AGAIN be reminded of the brevity of our time here on earth.

Why is it that it takes tragedy to awake us from the treadmills of our day-to-day lives to remind us to “put the first things first?” At some point in the week I’d heard another poignant thought from Doug Hannah on SiriusXM’s “The Message” that I feel might relate as we strive to “accomplish more” -

“Comparison is the thief of joy.” Lord, help is to learn to “live IN the moment,” yet not merely “FOR the moment” and be content with what we have and where we are.

Later that afternoon I made it to Northamton, MA and reconnected with Christa G, my next-door neighbor in Thousand Oaks, CA from Elementary & Middle School! I had the opportunity to introduce her and Kathy back in 2022 over lunch on the way to the Cape to meet Kathy’s youngest, Erin, but this time neither of us had anywhere we needed to be. We met at Treehouse Brewing and had a wonderful, far-reaching conversation about many topics: our lives, differing histories, families, common and differing points of view, etc. and of course Faith. It was wonderful to catch up with an old friend who’s life had an entirely different trajectory from my own and as in the bar in Buffalo, how we don’t have to agree on everything to have rational conversations about many things! As we broke to leave I couldn’t believe we’d been there for ~5 hours…fortunately only 2 beers so no issue moving on to the next place.

A few hours later I finally made it to the home of Bob K in Fitchburg, MA. He’s an old friend with whom I used to work while at Intel in Oregon and later in the DC area, who’d been employed by several companies with which we’d routinely collaborate. Even though we’d not seen each other in >20 yrs, upon hearing of this sabbatical, he’d reached out to let me know I could land in his driveway and he had 20A of shore power waiting! Even though I arrived late (sadly I’m seeing a pattern here) he expertly coached me back into his driveway and I cannot tell you how late we sat out with his dogs on the deck under the stars, catching up on where our lives had been and all that we’d learned along the way. The next morning (Wed 07.01) we continued our broad ranging conversation over some excellent homemade corned beef hash at a local diner during which I conveyed the secret to my becoming far less frustrated with conflicts at work. A few years ago I realized how a passage in Paul’s letter to the Colossians applied to me and that my acceptance of it led to reduced frustration, and greater peace in my life:

Col 3:23-24: “Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.”

This helped me understand that I’d been given talents and instincts by God and with them had developed experience that I could employ to the best of my ability as if working for the Lord, and hopefully my earthly “masters” would agree. Naturally success follows!

As I was leaving Bob’s place I passed a sign for the town of Leominster which was one of the towns in which my Dad grew up before their family moved to CA. Seeing that sign made me think: “I wonder how far I am from, Lexington and Concord, “the shot heard round the world?”” This was the first real battle following “Paul Revere’s Ride” to warn the Minutemen of the advance of British Troops to capture the gunpowder stowed in Concord, MA for the safety and protection of the local militia, and where the first British troops were killed in the Colonies as the American Revolution was brewing? Ahh, right around the corner and the week of the 250th? Clearly now my unplanned next stop…

Next up - week 5 in MA, NH for America’s 250th 4th of July in Capitol Concord and Acadia!

Tues (06.16) I left Seneca Lake and arrived at Long State Park at the entrance to the Thousand Islands region of NY, on the NE tip of Lake Ontario, NW of Watertown, NY and the weather was perfect - decent temp and no wind. I considered getting out and kayaking but after setting up camp I was feeling kinda lazy so decided upon on a campfire with a simple dinner of cheese and crackers until the light was gone - not til after 10PM! An amazingly peaceful sunset. In hindsight I wish I’d taken out the boat, little did I know this WX was abnormal.

Wed the 17th was a slow start - I had calls with both Ma Z (Kathy’s Mom June) & Erin, my youngest Bonus daughter - helpful to remain connected! It was kinda rainy so thought I ought to button up the AS, packed a turkey sammich & drove up to Wellesley Island State Park, more firmly in the Thousand Islands Park, along the St Lawrence Seaway. I hiked ~5.5mi at the Minna Anthony Common Nature Center - beautiful scenery and amazingly clear water in the St Lawrence!

As per the tradition Kathy & I had established following hikes years ago, I discovered Wood Boat Brewery on the way back to the campground. As I have taken to doing, I sat at the bar and started chatting with whomever was willing. I met a guy named named Pete, he mentioned he owned a water company and his daughter who was getting ready to go to college ended up joining us. In speaking with one of the servers at the bar I learned she was studying to be a psychiatrist yet encountered some difficulty with the local college that she’d been attending and was planning on transferring yet the experience made her question her direction. I tried to encourage her and shared the path that my second daughter Lauren and her hubby Grant had pursued, which seemed helpful. I broached why I was taking the trip on which I was embarked and after the usual condolences I’ve become accustomed to accepting, the conversation sort of fizzled so I headed back to camp.

The next AM (Thurs 06.18) was a rainy day so I spent more time in Devotionals and thought about the question below from former NFL Super Bowl winning Coach Tony Dungy’s “The One Year Uncommon Life Daily Challenge” (C) 2011, called “True Identity” shared below. Spring-boarding off of Jesus’s questioning of the disciples in Matthew 16:13-16: “When Jesus came to the region of Caesarea Philippi, he asked his disciples, “Who do people say that the Son of Man is?” “Well,” they replied, “some say John the Baptist, some say Elijah, and others say Jeremiah or one of the other prophets.” Then he asked them, “But who do you say l am?” Simon Peter answered, “You are the Messiah, the Son of the living God.”

Coach Dungy posits:

“Peter was spot-on. This was the same Peter who would later deny Christ on three different occasions. But at least for this moment, Peter was right on track.

We are often tempted to turn from Christ and who He calls us to be.

During the course of a season, at various times in team meetings unrelated to the football side of things, I would ask the guys to consider who they were. Many of them had never taken time to think that question through, especially when I said they needed to take football out of the equation. They had never thought of themselves except in the context of football. Everything they were, had done, and were about to do—to them, at least—was related to football.

So for them to stop and think for a moment about themselves unrelated to that environment - well, it was uncomfortable, to say the least. For some of my players, it seemed impossible to think in those terms. For many it was a totally new concept: to begin to think of who they were and of who God made them to be. To look at their interests and passions outside of football. To notice certain people in their lives—family, spouse, children—in a different way. To see their potential and purpose in other things besides being a football player was a bit unnerving. And also to stop and think for a moment where God fits into all of that.”

This had me thinking of my conversation with Pete at the brewery the night prior. I’d asked him “if he was still working and what he did.” He told me his job but I could’ve followed up with “who he is?!”

The next AM I decided to combine “the old & the new,” Ma Z’s old camping coffee pot Kath & I have used over an open fire yet pouring it over ice from the ice maker in the AS into my trusty USNA Class of ‘88 Tumbler. 😬

I’d wanted to kayak on Lake Ontario but it was simply too windy. After the “fun” on Seneca Lake, the previous stop, I was not going there again so opted for a 12mi trail ride along a rail-trail in Clayton, NY.

After the ride I noticed a cool renovated Victorian house named “The Hops Spot” - how does a beer lover not hit THAT? I sat at the counter and chatted with my server in her early 20s and after sharing the nature of my trip, learned she’d recently lost her 21 yr old brother. We discussed the brevity of life and the importance of making the most of the time we have count. She mentioned “tomorrow not being promised” so I showed her my new tattoo and suggested God had a plan for our lives that we may not see. It was a good moment. She mentioned the business also has a Fried Chicken and Whiskey place called “the Whiskey Coop” in Watertown and being a sucker for Fried Chicken I simply HAD to check it out even though a 45min drive.

On the way to the fried chicken place I felt the need to stop by Cape Vincent Brewing having driven past it 2-3x already, yet I was awfully unprepared as there were a number of West Point and Army football items on the walls and I had NOTHING from Navy with me I could leave behind?! I met a guy named Dan who’d been a “stay-at-home” dad while his wife worked in tech. They lived in the area 11 months a year and went to Costa Rica for the coldest month of the year. I tried to dance around topics of meaning but couldn’t really get there. They had two kids with apparently no prospects for grandchildren and admittedly, they were kind of bumping along… it was a pleasant conversation but I had difficulty turning to a more meaningful topic. While he seemed content, I felt a bit sad for him.

I then made my way to the Whiskey Coop fried chicken place recommended by the waitress at The Hops Spot and had a GREAT dinner at the Bar - Bartender Nate’s recommendations were 100% on target! A younger guy sat down at the bar for dinner as well and I heard something about him being in the Army so I probed and Andy was a Blackhawk MEDEVAC pilot recently assigned to Ft Drum. He was about the age I was when I left the Navy so that made him being born roughly when I left the Navy! We had an engaging conversation largely about flying but also family, deployments, etc. and must’ve spoken for over an hour!

Fri (06.19) it was chilly and very windy so sadly nojoy on kayaking Lake Ontario. - l broke camp and then made my way towards Rochester on the way to Letchworth State Park for the next few days.

At a random gas station stop on the way to Rochester a guy in a Chevy Tahoe told me “I had the best truck ever made - the Tundras with a 5.7L up through ’21 were unstoppable! He would still have his if it hadn’t been wrecked in an accident.” I thanked him and mentioned I’d performed the research but wish I had better fuel economy, but it’s understandable, the reliability is more important. He cut me off and said “you didn’t buy that for fuel economy.”😬

Our former MD neighbor and bonus daughter Hannah T lives in Buffalo and had previously told me I needed to get a “Garbage Plate” in Rochester as I was passing through. She said “Nick Tahou Hots” was the best place, and boy was she right! I called the restaurant and explained I was dragging a sizable trailer and wanted to see if it would be viable to pull it in there to try to park. The gent to whom I spoke said he was a trailer camping guy as well and asked me to call him back when I was close so he could help guide me in. I called him back as I neared arrival, he came out to meet me and guided me into a safe parking area. He recommended the cheeseburger garbage plate w/macaroni salad, home fries, onions & hot meat sauce all mixed in w/fresh Italian bread - very unique but tasty!! We talked about the nature of and reason behind my trip as well as trailer camping a little bit. He suggested a spot in the Adirondaks if I have time so perhaps I’ll hit that on my way from Maine towards Michigan in July… It turned out that he was the owner of the restaurant, Alex Tahou, and his grandfather had opened the business in 1918! I met his wife working there as well and as we continued to talk, he gave me a T-shirt and a bumper sticker. 😀 I asked him if I could take a picture with him in front of my trailer and as we were about to part company I stepped out in faith and asked a question I’d never asked a stranger. I took a breath and asked him if he knew Jesus. He said “Oh Yes,” and we ended up chatting for another 15-20mins! He shared how he and his family (wife & two daughters) survived a terrible car accident and upon showing me the picture of the car its difficult to understand how… Alex firmly believed he was here for a reason. They used to be open 24hrs but sadly lost about 75% of their business during COVID after all the business traffic in downtown Rochester vanished. He’s in his 70s and feels he’s going to have to shut it down in a while so I would humbly ask, if in anywhere near Rochester, please check them out - a fantastic, unique meal for a very reasonable price: Nick Tahou Hots 320 West Main Street, Rochester, NY 14608. https://garbageplate.com/

I finally made it to Letchworth State Park in Western NY, recommended by several friends & family members, about an hour from Rochester & 1.25 from Buffalo. The park looked beautiful with loads of hiking & possibly biking trails yet it was pouring when I arrived so I became soaked unhooking & setting up. I could even see my breath - so much for summer! The campsite was super shady so while private, Starlink had some difficulty connecting.

Sat (06.20) thankfully the weather cleared such that I could explore the park, poking along the main road throughout, stopping at each overlook, hiking any trail I could find to secure as many views of the Genesee River Gorge and waterfalls as possible. There were three primary sets of falls, Lower, Middle & Upper, and this place is certainly worth adding to your list of sites to experience in NY State! At one of the overlooks I noticed a woman with a few children wearing an HSM-40 T-shirt so I asked her about her connection. HSM is the designator for the U.S. Navy’s “Helicopter Maritime Strike” Squadrons, flying the MH-60R variant of the Sikorsky Seahawk, a follow on to those I flew 30 years ago which is somewhat difficult to type. This woman served in HSM-40, the East Coast FRS (Fleet Replacement Squadron) that trains Naval Aviators and Aircrew on the specifics of the aircraft and missions they perform, preparing them for the Fleet Squadrons serving “in Harm’s Way.” My last tour in the Navy was as an Instructor Pilot in HS-10, a similar FRS for the SH-60F & HH-60H. Back to the family I met - her husband was currently forward deployed to Japan and assigned to a Carrier Battle Group operating out of that region. It is always a good feeling to meet and support Americans out there on the tip of the spear.

Most of the hikes I took were not very strenuous so I felt I ought to find a trail upon which to ride and upon recommendation from a Park Volunteer, proceeded to an entry point for the Fingers Lakes Trail on the south side of the gorge. I’ll say this - as attractive as the first few miles were, sadly, recent storms had felled several trees. I was able to move one of them, forced to hoist the bike and climb over the next one but the 3rd one was so huge it was easier to carry the bike and hike around it through the woods! Unfortunately a few miles later the trail became so narrow due to overgrowth that the only logical choice was to turn back. Undeterred, I found a gravel road that followed the south side of the gorge to the bottom, seeking additional views of the river. As I thoroughly enjoyed the speed attainable on the way down I DID contemplate the fact that I’d need to ride back UP and was determined not to have to get off and walk. Thank goodness for the super small forward sprocket on my mountain bike!

Sun (06.21) I drove up to Buffalo to join Hannah T for Father’s Day at Restoration Church. As I often do, I listened to “The Message” on SiriusXM satellite radio and heard a song I couldn’t recall hearing previously by Elevation Worship & Maverick City Music, “Wait on You” and there was a line in it about a hospital room and a doctor giving you unwelcome news.

I couldn’t help but think again “What if we had not pursued the trial at MD Anderson? What if we had done Radiation over Thanksgiving instead, as had been planned? How much more time would Kath have had and would she have enjoyed it more because she wouldn’t have been traveling back-and-forth to Houston all the time?” I know there’s no point in thinking of such things but there they are. Then again, Kath very clearly asked our Medical Oncologist at Duke “what would he do if she were his wife?” He’d said he’d go for the trial, because maybe it would work, whereas everything else wasn’t really likely to do so, recalling her Chemo prior to that point, Folfox was only 33% effective. Although they didn’t quite say it that way, as optimistic as I always tried to be, it seemed that every other treatment option was essentially “buying time” and unlikely to cure. In reality, I know I did the best I could with the information available, but she’s still gone. #CancerSucks

Fortunately I later heard Lincoln Brewster’s “Today is the Day:”

“Today is the day, You have made

I will rejoice & be glad in it

And I won’t worry about tomorrow

I’m given’ you my fears & sorrow

Where you lead me, I will follow

I’m trusting in what you say

Today is the day

I will stand upon your truth

All my days I’ll live for you”

That morning I was so grateful to attend Hannah’s church - she introduced me to soooo many of her friends, and several of the Pastors. The service was based on Romans 8:29-30, the passages immediately following that in my latest tattoo - in effect, “We have been Chosen by God!” It was a moving and at times, tearful, encouraging service, with Pastor Wes laying out a wonderful case for the Truths the Apostle Paul lays out in Romans 8, which I read at Kathy’s internment:

“29 For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. 30 And those he predestined, he also called; those he called, he also justified; those he justified, he also glorified.”

The Pastor made the point that how one internalizes these passages can make the difference between living as a frustrated, versus a peaceful and fulfilled Christian and referenced so many different passages throughout the Bible in so doing. He reiterated that many of us, if we’re honest with ourselves, don’t really like this notion because deep down, we want to be in control. To THAT I can attest - I was reminded of the line from the TobyMac song “When Love Broke Thru:”

“I did all that I could to undo me but you loved me enough to pursue me...”

Hannah and her friends Ainsley & Grace treated me to a Father’s Day brunch and afterwards Hannah and I hiked the Niagara Gorge & Niagara Falls State Parks - such wonderful views and conversation! Upon departing company with Hannah, I told her I really needed some great Buffalo Wings! She suggested I hit “Bar-Bill” in East Aurora on the outskirts of Buffalo on my way back to camp.

As I walked up to the restaurant I inadvertently entered the bar immediately next door which was affiliated with the restaurant yet I learned did NOT serve Wings!? Regardless, I sat down at the bar & had a tremendously spirited conversation with a former Catholic named Tom. As we were getting to know each other and I was explaining where I was going and why, I conveyed that my reason for this trip is after my wife bringing me to Christ I wanted to hopefully hear from God as to what he thought I should do next. That spurred him to start wanting to talk about religion. He identified as an artist and musician & we ended up talking about different religions, unfortunately some politics, and other topics. He was convinced that religions are about “power,” and I suggested, denominationally I couldn’t necessarily disagree. He claimed Jesus was a pacifist, but I reminded him of how Jesus reacted to the religious leaders who were distorting God’s message - thrashing the marketplace in the temple courts. He said “Jesus never killed anyone” and with that I agreed. He questioned the authenticity of the Bible from the standpoint that it was “written by men” and I posed the question I’d learned “Does he have any books and why does he believe what those people have written?” and that I’ve studied the authenticity of the Bible and that it is has been challenged more than any other ancient document and proven to be reliable. Regarding the distortions of Jesus’s message by people claiming to be Christians, I used the analogy I learned from John Dixon’s Bullies & Saints: “If someone plays Mozart poorly, do you blame Mozart or the musician?”

He tried to make the point that all religions are about peace or love and I walked him through how love may be a component of each major religion, it is not the primary focus of each of the “big five” (Christianity, Judaism, Islam, Hinduism & Buddhism) touching on the focus of each and followed with the logical point that “all religions might be wrong, but they can’t all be right,” and touched on the distinction between aspirin and arsenic - they are both white powders that start with the letter “A” - clearly differences matter more than similarities! All these points seemed to make sense to him or open his eyes a bit. He also tried to make the point that we were just like animals, but I explained being made in the image of God, our ability to reason and choose to do the things that we that we do with freewill, distinguishes us from animals. He said he appreciated the conversation, that we were able to talk about different things, and I could present evidence for my perspective and yet also listen to his. We discussed the importance of being able to do so, and how the definition of “tolerance” seems to have changed. Honestly I don’t know that he’s going to do anything differently but I suggested he re-read the Biblical books of Romans and John’s Gospel and he seemed to at least be willing to consider it. I reiterated this with him before I left and we shook hands.

THEN, I finally walked next door to the restaurant at which I’d intended to eat! As I sat at the bar of the next place awaiting my chow of Buffalo Wings, I noticed a younger gent wearing a San Diego Padres ball cap, about which I inquired, as having been a a resident of San Dog from 1990-96 while stationed at NAS North Island. Throughout our conversation I learned he’d met his wife in SoCal and moved back to the area with her to start a San Diego style Taco restaurant in the area, had 3 kids and was also a Youth Baseball Coach. We had a great conversation across family & work related topics & then having wised-up a few days previously, I asked him - “you said you’re a baseball coach, restaurant owner, husband and parent, WHO would you say you are?” He responded with “Restaurant owner” and then immediately expressed embarrassment for having answered that way. He stated he was going to be thinking about that question on the way home.

I mentioned that I asked him this question in the context of the Tony Dungy Devotional I’d recently read (and mentioned above), when Coach D asked his players “who they were,” and that they couldn’t mention football. I told him I was a Christian & that my wife brought me to Jesus. He didn’t react negatively to that statement, but I had the impression that he was not. We talked a little bit more about priorities and after hearing about MacKenzie’s cancer battle & death in parallel with my divorce as well as Kathy’s recent struggle and passing, this big tough guy I only just met asked if he could give me a hug! I finished my dinner after he left and upon my departure discovered that he’d paid for my dinner!

Based on these recent experiences, I’m starting to think of these encounters as “Barstool Evangelism.”

Monday (06.22) as I was working through my Devotionals, one of them challenged me as to “what I could do for another?” The “idea occurred to me” (God-wink) that I knew the first name of the man with whom I last met the night prior and the name of his restaurant so I decided to ship him a copy of Coach Dungy’s sports-oriented Devotional via Amazon and whouldcha’ know, as I was “checking out,” discovered I had a credit on my Amazon account so it was essentially “free!” Isn’t it amazing how the Lord works if we let Him, and then simply act upon the direction?

After a Grief Counseling session with the very helpful Counselor from the hospice team back home in NC over Zoom and seeing as it was raining AGAIN, I elected to make the 1.5hr drive to visit the Corning Museum of Glass. It was very interesting, with many glass-blowing demonstrations and an entire section of “glass in technology,” addressing optics from fresnel lenses used in lighthouses to massive telescopes and fiber optics critical to telecommunications and the internet. The images below are of a piece entitled “Virtue of Blue,” a chandelier that appears to be made out of butterflies yet the wings of the insects are actually solar cells that power the lamp… Yet another place I’d recommend checking out.

Tues (06.23) I broke camp and made my way to Stoneboro, PA and the farmette of our long time former MD neighbors the Tingley family, to reconnect with longtime friends and attend the wedding of their youngest son Luke. Shockingly, I discovered Erie Brewing Company on the way. Doncha’ love those signs along the Interstate announcing important services at exits such as gas, food, and breweries? 😬

Next up - week 4 in Stoneboro, a quick trip to the Grand Canyon of PA, the Poconos, MA and on to 4th of July in NH!

Being near the town of Ithaca I figured I ought to check it out, given that my Bro Jason attended Grad School at Cornell there and I’d never been. What a “Gorges” campus :) aside from the Winter I’m sure!

After that, I’d been itching to get the new kayak in the water and the S tip of Cayuga seemed so peaceful in the early evening it would be a good place to try it out. The local kayak rental shop was happy to let me use their launch and even let me wash my boat afterwards! It was uneventful other than almost falling off the truck and whacking the crap outta my foot while remounting the boat but I think after two installs I now understand the most “effective” solo approach. That evening I sought and thankfully discovered Ithaca Beer Co for pizza and a beer just before closing @ 9 on the way back to the campsite. It was a great day of activity but I realized that aside from the periodic “hellos” on the hiking trails I didn’t really get a change to speak with anyone…

While driving, Toby Mac’s “Faithfully,” released in 2022, resonated

Excerpt:

“It’s been a long year, it almost took me down, I swear

Life was so good, I’m not so sure we knew what we had

I’ll never be the same man, I’ll never feel like I felt before

It’s been a hard year, it almost took me down

But when my world broke into pieces, You were there faithfully

When I cried out to You, Jesus, You made a way for me

I may never be the same man, but I’m a man who still believes

When I cried out to You, Jesus, You were there faithfully

I’ve had a hard time findin’ the blue in the skies above me

And if I’m keepin’ it real, I’ve been half-fakin’ the happy they see

I may look like the same man, but I’m half the man I was

It’s been a hard year, it almost took me down

But when my world broke into pieces, You were there faithfully

When I cried out to You, Jesus, You made a way for me

I may never be the same man, but I’m a man who still believes

When I cried out to You, Jesus, You were there faithfully”

Sunday (06.14) I found a great local nondenominational Bible church, Senaca Community Church (SCC), having perused the beliefs and values of several in the area online. SCC appeared very close to my home of Generations in SPT and I was not disappointed. The place was very inviting, welcoming and the message was on “Service,” in a series called “Walk This Way - Making God Smile,” leaning on Psalm 119:135:

“Look upon me with love; teach me your decrees”

Pastor Dave was really solid and backed everything up with scripture. A key takeaway I heard was: “If we don’t respond to God‘s call, He will find somebody else to do it because He will make sure his plan gets accomplished!” BAM!

The service was perfect for me that day. The opening song was based on Jeremiah 29:11 and one of the additional songs we sang was one of the two that Kathy had chosen for her “Living Tribute” at home in Southport on March 9th, prior to her passing, “Goodness of God” by Bethel Music. It’s a beautiful song, but still it makes me openly weep. I met with the prayer team after the service who prayed for me and made me aware of a Griefshare class the following evening. I also spoke to the Pastor and reinforced how important it was that they had their values, mission and everything stated on their website - that’s what made me decide to attend. Finally, I also spoke to a young couple who was baptized because they shared their testimony about having lost a child and I’d noted the husband was wise enough to realize that he and his wife were processing grief differently. Obviously that’s not something I understood when we lost MacKenzie in 2010…

After church I drove out to look at some of the other Finger Lakes and visit a winery on Skaneateles Lake that Kathy’s brother Andy and his wife Terry mentioned. Given it was a rainy day I figured I might as well.

In the car I heard the song “Wait” by Matt Maher - the chorus: “Wait, I will wait… and let the Lord renew my strength…”

On the way towards the winery, as Kath & I would often do, I searched Yelp for a local non-chain restaurant and found the Auburn Diner at the northern tip of Owasco Lake, sat at the counter and the “kitchen-sink” style scramble was delicious! I chatted with two of the servers Tiffany & Mary and the fellow customer next to me, Denny. I listened to challenges with adult children and shared some of my own experience, hopefully received as encouragement! It turned out Denny had lived in central NC for ~20 years, but his wife had cancer three times and during her 3rd bout wanted to move back up to the Finger Lakes to be near her family. He’d lost her several years ago yet had remained in the area. That day he was planning to drive back to visit his children in Central NC. I inquired & he said he was a man of faith, so I asked him if we could pray together about both our journeys, and he agreed - right there at the counter. 🙌🏻💜

As the rain contained I made my way to Anyela’s Vineyard, though I’m not really a “wine tasting alone” kinda guy. As I was finishing the wine tasting I chose to walk around the beautifully floral grounds, looking at the lake and couldn’t help but think about how much Kathy would have enjoyed the experience, aside from the rain of course, she never like a cloudy “gloomy” day, always wanting to see the sun. 😂

I once again pondered about not having the chance to truly take “time off” after she was diagnosed, aside from treatments. I had desired some dedicated time off to take her somewhere we could truly enjoy without the specter of “work” looming. I had drafted a few plans for last year - we were supposed to take another European river cruise in August to dive deeper into eastern Europe from Budapest where our first & last cruise dropped off in Oct ‘24, to Bucharest, but of course we had to cancel that. Then I thought between chemo rounds in September or October I could take her to the Southwest to see the national parks in Utah to which we’ve never been, but that didn’t work out either. Then there was the Mediterranean cruise we were supposed to be on right now…

I hesitate to “complain,” realizing we were able to travel to far more places and see many more things than most people do but once I felt the “clock was ticking” in some respects, I wanted to take some REAL time OFF, unlike when I was asked to carry my work phone with me on the European cruise in ‘24, yet sadly that never came to pass. In hindsight I don’t know that I would’ve done anything differently - I’d felt I needed to “save” the Sick & Vaca time for the long fight, after all MacKenzie‘s lasted five years. But almost as suddenly as it began in Dec ’24, it seemed the race had been “canceled” in February ’26.

Seeing all the big fancy houses along the lakeshore, I mused that we’d never wanted a big fancy house, or a “vacation home.” We loved our little cottage & our beautiful Airstream (AS). I just wanted to take her to see more of God’s creation in this amazing land in which we live.

Striving for some nature amidst the rain, after the winery I found Carpenter Falls at Bahar Preserve, Lake Skaneateles and then swung by Owasco Lake and tried to check out a nature area, but the road was REALLY bad, there were only muddy hiking trails and I’d neglected to bring my boots with me. I decided that’d be the last time - I now take hiking, biking and boating gear with me whenever I leave the campsite, just in case. Ma Z (Kathy’s Mom, June) called me on the way from there and we chatted for a bit. We touched on a number of subjects, including both of what we’re dealing with from a grief standpoint. Her having lost her husband of 63 years in December while we were in the thick of the Clinical Trial at MD Anderson in Houston, and a sister not long after Kathy. She complimented me as a hero and an angel, but I still don’t feel like I did anywhere near enough for Kath.

I’d originally planned to grill a steak over a campfire for dinner at the campground but not only was it still raining but a huge T-storm (thunderstorm) kicked up so I figured I wouldn’t be grilling and would merely have some leftovers back at the AS. I stopped at Garrett Brewing in the tiny town of Trumansburg on the W side of Lake Cayuga (sensing a theme?) intending to have a brewski and leave. I sat at a table with a number of other people, simply drinking my beer and listening to the band. They left without my notice and another guy sat down at the table - we started chatting and realized we both had spent a lot of time in Maryland and it simply evolved from there. Farid was somewhat recently retired from running a family restaurant in the Baltimore area and we were soon joined by his GF Courtney. We ended up talking about our various experiences & “why we were in the Finger Lakes.” Interestingly enough there was some connection I cannot recall between Courtney and a guy from USNA ‘90 named Marquand which is an unusual enough name that I seemed to remember it - he must’ve been one of my Plebes in 1986…?

As I was about to leave Courtney mentioned they were planning to eat dinner and the brewery was shutting down so they invited me to join them! We went to a Mexican place next door, they insisted on paying and we talked about all kinds of stuff, touching on faith and the nature of my journey. It was a pleasant evening & conversation and I shared the Substack URL. I really need to get some cards made up as Katie suggested…

I didn’t arrive back at the campsite until the third period of the NHL Stanley Cup Final, which you may not had been following, but our Carolina Hurricanes won by defeating the Vegas Golden Knights in a shutout! (Sorry Norm) 😬

Monday was to be my final full day in the Finger Lakes region so I decided it might finally be time to “stay home” & explore the campground. Kath usually wanted to bike around a campground after our arrival but I’ve sorta been jumping into other stuff! I intended to take a trail ride and then kayak from the eastern shore of Seneca Lake where the campground was located. I made lunch while finishing up breakfast so I’d only have one cleaning session and while doing so this song played:

“Fear is Not My Future” (Released 2022 Kirk Franklin, Brandon Lake, et al.)

Excerpts:

“Let Him turn it in your favor

Watch Him work it for your good

He’s not done with what He’s started

He’s not done until it’s good

Hello peace, hello joy, hello love

Hello strength, hello hope

It’s a new horizon

Fear is not my future

You are, You are

Sickness is not my story

You are, You are

Heartbreak’s not my home

You are, (yes You are)

Death is not the end, Jesus

You are, You are

It’s always been You, my story is You

And goodbye fear, goodbye guilt, goodbye shame

Goodbye pain, goodbye grave

It’s a new horizon

Let the light in, let the light on in

It’s a new horizon, let the light on in”

The 14mi Bike ride went well but the kayaking? Not such a great idea…it was much more difficult kayaking on the central eastern shore of Seneca than it was the southern tip of Cayuga previously! As cold as the water and strong the winds were I was very glad I had the spray skirt & the rudder. I’d originally thought I’d try to paddle across the lake because it didn’t look like it was “that far” but about 100 yards offshore it was pretty clear it was way too rough - I heard Goose in my head “Not good Mav, NOT GOOD!” So I wisely turned around and decided to practice crossing the waves with and against the current, relatively close to the shore. With only ~30 minutes paddling I was bushed! I probably spent more time loading and unloading the boat than actually paddling.. :(

Monday night I joined the Griefshare class at the church I’d attended the morning prior, SCC, having been invited by the Prayer team to which I spoke and was glad I did. I’d participated in that curriculum after MacKenzie’s passing back in 2010 and am pretty sure I helped co-lead that class some years later at Calvary Mt Airy so the material was not unfamiliar. The group welcomed me and of course I had something to share… (ahem).

I closed the day by over-grilling my steak over the fire but it was still a tasty dinner with a beautiful sunset, a clear sky and MANY Constellations observable. I hung out by the fire til the pile of wood had burned down to coals ~11ish?

Tuesday (06.16) I left for NE tip of Lake Ontario - starting week 3 and the next post…

The next morning I had a peaceful walk through Andy & Terry’s woods while listening to the “Sing” Devotional by The Worship Initiative, and after some great chow including eggs fresh from Kathy’s Niece Bernie’s chickens, I decided to explore one of the local State Parks, Prompton Lake with a 5mi hike. This Eagle Scout was “prepared,” yet neglected to act on it - I didn’t bother to refill the water in my Camelback from the large bottles I had in the truck, or put the food I had there into the bag with me either. The hike through the woods was peaceful, but lonely - Kath loved to hike in the woods, she enjoyed the silence (one of the many ways in which we differed), yet I found it deafening. It felt quite isolated and the trails were not very well used yet I’d ALSO neglected to carry the bag that had the “Bear Bell” attached (politely notifying animals as to one’s presence) so I felt the need to stomp my feet a bit while I was hiking to make some noise. Further, there was no cell reception - and I realized I’d forgotten to bring my portable GPS, pretty sure I left it at home… The waterfall views were hard to obtain - definitely had to go “off the path” a bit to see them.

The next day I went to Seven Tubs Recreational area, outside Wilkes-Barre (pronounced wilks-bury) which was a wonderful ROI hike - only ~3mi with loads of great waterfall views. As Kath & I usually did after a hike, I found a brewery, Susquehanna Brewing Co., had a decent chat with the folks at the bar, explaining the nature of my trip, and bought some tasty brews to go - there’s nothing like a crisp Shandy after a hike!

One last dinner at Andy and Terry’s - some amazingly tasty barbecue chicken & shared the “Crowler” of Bourbon Barrel Aged Stout I picked up at SBC. If y’all don’t know, a “Crowler” is in between a can and a “Growler” (64oz resealable bottle filled onsite by most Craft breweries). It’s a 32 ounce can, so when it’s north of 10% alcohol definitely not something you wanna be drinking on your own!

My last morning in the Poconos was an easy start, devotionals and breakfast outside at the campsite but it took a little longer to get it torn down than I thought it would given my hose to flush the black tank (sewage) wasn’t long enough so I had to get creative. It became pretty warm and ended up, ahh, “moist.” The drive up to Seneca Lake, NY wasn’t that far (~3 hrs) but I really question the route on which Google Maps took me! The roads suuuucked - some of the worst I’ve seen. Very steep, narrow, and amazingly bumpy. Maybe it was PA in general though because even when I made it to I-81 it was under construction with no shoulder and again tremendously rough. Then again, Terry & Andy had advised that drivers swerving all over the road in rural PA is not indicative of being “under the influence,” but merely pothole avoidance!

I made it up through the narrow, and yes, bumpy, streets of Ithaca, NY and as I was on the way from Cayuga Lake to Seneca Lake, I turned onto the road G-Maps told me I was supposed to take yet it had a “road closed” sign after I was committed! I was kind of concerned because I thought it would be too hard to back up, so I flagged down a driver coming the other way and asked him if it was “really closed” or if I could make it the mile I needed to before my next turn? He said “it’s closed because there are so many potholes and nobody will fix them. You can make it but you’re gonna pound the heck out of yourself.” He was not wrong, but I made it!

I arrived at Sampson State Park on the east side of Seneca Lake without further challenges but it was ~95 degrees and I was expecting it to be a bit more temperate. The Park is sweet - a former Navy base Kathy and I discovered when we were in the area in Sept ‘22 and we’d wanted to come back. I managed to land a site within view of the lake for $28/night, including “shore power” (electric)! As I worked to complete setting up, a notable storm kicked up over the lake, dropped the temperature about 20° with huge gusts of wind but I was able to get the AS leveled, unhooked, shore power engaged, AC running to cool the AS down and even Starlink up for connectivity before it started dumping rain. Sadly, there was nothing else I could do but sit in the trailer, watch the storm and drink a beer. Beats the crap outta tent camping😎

After the storm has largely passed through I found Lucky Hare brewing - a nice Hazy IPA w/ a smashed bacon cheeseburger, a huge mess o’ fries & a great view of Seneca Lake - an incredible sunset - unbelievable - 360° of pink!

It’s kind of weird - it doesn’t exactly feel like “camping” when one can watch the NHL playoffs (#GoCanes) in the AS over Starlink after taking a walk along the edge of the lake at sunset…

Yesterday I went down to Watkins Glen Gorge for another waterfall-oriented hike as it was forecasted to be good weather and I wanted to hike it again WITHOUT RAIN, given when Kathy and I had done so in Sept ‘22 it had poured on the only day I had available and we ended up buying new rain jackets in town. Fortunately, I’ve left that rain jacket in the AS ever since and decided to pack it with me for THIS sunny hike, including all the other items I had neglected to take on the previous hike: food, extra water, first aid & snake bite kits, the Bear Bell, etc. And wouldn’t you know, it ended up raining anyway! A guy on the trail with me noticed my Bear Bell jingling and he said while hiking out west he was asked “How can you tell the difference between the scat (excrement) of Brown Bears from Grizzlies? The scat of Grizzlies has Bear Bells in it…” 🤣🤣

As the hike was only 3.25mi and there was plenty of daylight I decided I wanted to go for a trail ride somewhere, given that I’d been hauling my mountain bike around untouched for a week and a half. A volunteer “recommended” a trail a few miles away yet I found it “below expectations,” given that the trail wasn’t well marked and much of it was coincident with streets “in town.” At least it took me to the southern tip of Seneca Lake!

As on prior days, I was committed to seeking out some new breweries after outdoor activity, as Kath & I had often done, yet they were largely unfulfilling. The beer was excellent but amidst the beauty of the evening sky & approaching sunset over Seneca Lake, the “inner darkness” was settling in.

At this point, I’d like to merge in the Devotional I did this morning from “Our Daily Bread” because the topic and Q&A helped me realize how I was feeling last night. Having taken the “Strength of Materials” engineering course at Annapolis in the mid-80s, and learning all about “strength” versus “brittleness,” the analogy to Tungsten was rather fascinating given how often I hear “how strong I am.” Obviously this is intended as a compliment or encouragement, yet the “brittleness” prevails at times. It may be obvious but the quoted text below is italic and the bold text were my answers in the moment.

DEPENDENT ON GOD’S STRENGTH

“Each time He said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weakness, so that the power of Christ can work through me.”

~2 Corinthians 12:9 (NLT)

“Tungsten is something of a paradox. It has the highest tensile strength of any pure element, making it extremely difficult to pull apart. But the Mead Metals website notes, “In terms of impact strength, tungsten is weak - it’s a brittle metal known to shatter on impact.” It’s fascinating that tungsten, the strongest natural metal, is also so weak and brittle.

Human beings display a similar characteristic. Though capable of great strength both physically and mentally, we’re easily crushed under the weight of this fallen, broken world. Paul experienced this personally. In 2 Corinthians 11, he described experiences that overwhelmed him (VV. 23-29). But God encouraged him: “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Paul resolved, “Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me” (2 CORINTHIANS 12:9).

Earlier in 2 Corinthians, Paul had written, “We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed” (4:8). There’s hope, even though the strongest child of God knows all too well that this world is simply too much for us. We’re happily dependent on the strength of His grace if we are to endure. May we, like Paul, embrace our weaknesses so God’s power can carry us through. ~BILL CROWDER

Q&A:

When did you experience a moment that felt like it would crush you?”

RIGHT NOW! The loneliness and seemingly pointless future is emotionally crushing.

“How will you rest in God’s strength the next time you’re in a crisis?”

Honestly, I don’t know. I don’t know how I can “rest” in God’s strength as I am restless. I know He’s all powerful. I know He has good plans for me but still, this loneliness is overwhelming at times. I was able to talk a little bit with a couple at one of the breweries I stopped by last night and I touched on Faith a couple of times but stopped short of asking them if they knew Jesus. In all the other places I went yesterday I was alone yet surrounded by couples and families. It reminds me of Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s “Rime of the Ancient Mariner” when stranded alone at sea - “Water, water, every where, Nor any drop to drink…”

At the last brewery, the solo guitarist was playing Lenny Kravitz’s “Fly Away” - it seemed so appropriate. “I want to get away…I want to fly away…”

“Dear Father, please help me to rest in Your strength to carry me through life’s crushing moments.”

(C) 2026 Our Daily Bread Ministries

Enough with the morose - here’s a chuckle for ya! Yesterday my new tattoo had been itching a bit and Katie had recommended a thin layer of Aquaphor over it to prevent itching and peeling. I took the Aquaphor with me yesterday in event it started itching, or at least I thought I did, and last night after showering, I decided I should apply some to the tat. I looked (obviously not) EVERYWHERE for the stuff. I went out the truck two times, tore everything apart, looked all over the inside of the AS and eventually threw my hands up in frustration. This morning while walking behind the trailer, look what I found on the deck? I must’ve dropped it before I even left yesterday! 🙄

Regardless, today is a NEW DAY and shortly I’ll be heading over to Lake Cayuga and Ithaca where my Lil’ Bro Jason attended grad school at Cornell eons ago, yet which I’ve never seen. My goal is to discover some places that Kathy and I never saw together and share what I glean. Here’s to “strength in weakness” and prayers for a bit faster healing.

The first night I glamped at the mountain top cabin of Dave T, an old friend in Lexington, VA, arriving around 11 PM after a rather harrowing trek over the Blue Ridge Mountains on a winding mountain pass. You know you’re in trouble when you keep seeing “runaway truck ramps” and gotta keep the truck in second gear! Maaan was it DARK! I understand it’s a beautiful drive during the daytime… (duh) 🙄 Fortunately, we chilled out by his campfire under the stars till about 3AM. Dave is, the brother of our old neighbors in Mount Airy - Steve & Mary. T I learned a really cool story that night - I know their parents pretty well and they’re still kicking around in their mid-90s, and Dave told the story of when his father Floyd was about five, his grandfather came to live with them and all he brought with him was a Bible, an oil lamp by which to read the Bible, and a “4 x 4.” He said this 4 x 4, while being a 4” x 4” piece of wood, had a different four letter word on each side and if you kept in balance with those four words throughout your life, you would be happy, healthy and fulfilled. Now Dave is a consummate woodworking dude and numerous people have requested duplicates yet because 4 x 4‘s are sizable, he decided to reinvent them as 4 cm x 4 cm. 😬 The video I tried unsuccessfully to attach illustrates these life principles: Work, Play, Love, Pray. 🙌🏻 Amen. 💜

Dave took me to breakfast at the Pink Cadillac Diner and then to Natural Bridge, VA as I’d never been there. I’ve seen the sign off of I-81 many times and always thought I should check it out. While it was only a short walk down the trails, it really was quite impressive. It’s interesting how U.S. Route 11 goes right over the top of the bridge, but you’d never know it because there’s fencing on either side that prevents you from seeing down to the sizable stone archway. Long ago it was fairly common for prominent people to inscribe their initials in the wall (early graffiti?) and while faint, I noted one was George Washington’s! As we were walking and talking, I became saddened because I thought for 20 years I’d lived within reach of that place yet Kathy and I had never seen it. I sincerely hope that she had visited it sometime in her life because it’s exactly the sort of combination of experiencing the beauty of God’s creation and learning about history that we always enjoyed on our travels together.

Tues I trekked up to MD and spent the rest of the week at two different farms which were rather quiet and peaceful.

After dropping the AS (Kath called it, the “Dreamstream”) at Camp Comus farm I had a fab dinner with Kathy’s Aunt Nancy and Cousin Beth at Clyde’s Tower Oaks Lodge. It was interesting to learn more about Kathy’s earlier days growing up from their perspective.

Wed I scooted up to Frederick, MD to meet my oldest daughter Katie for tattoos! I had three before Kathy and I met, but she wasn’t really a fan of inking so I didn’t acquire any more until this week. Since she and moreso, Jesus, thankfully changed my life I’d been feeling that a Christ-centered tattoo would be important, but wasn’t sure until I saw a phrase on the necklace of my friend Jess M at church in Southport a year or so ago. After she explained it to me, I asked if I could take a picture of it so I would remember it. Much more recently when I was introducing her to another one of my friends, explaining the symbol to which she introduced me, she said “oh yeah you took a picture of my chest.” I was like “wait a minute… context please!!”😂 The symbol if y’all can’t track it in the attached picture means “God is Greater Than my Highs & Lows.” Katie and her extremely talented tattoo artist Caitlin collaborated with me on the overall design. I wanted a view of snow-capped mountains with a Cross and the Sun coming up over the mountains, along with a raging sea, and MacKenzie & Kathy’s birthdates & Heavenly birthdates in their respective favorite colors, topped off by my favorite passage, Romans 8:28. I read the book of Romans to Kathy a few times during her illness and specifically Chapter 8 several days before her passing when she was especially upset. We had been taught that Romans 8 is the GOAT of the Bible or the “Greatest Of All Time,” and as such I read it at her burial in Quantico as well. In my view, Romans 8:28 sums up the Christian life, and I certainly have seen that in action, even thinking back to before I became a follower of Jesus:

“And we know that God causes everything to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to his purpose for them”🙌🏻💜💪🏻

I enjoyed the next few days with my oldest daughter Katie‘s family playing with the grandboyz Reed & Mac. Thursday I picked up six-year-old Reed from school early & took him to the park for a few hours and yes, we hit ALL THREE playgrounds in that park even though it was 95° out! After that we attended “Touch a Truck” day at the local fairgrounds which was like our “Big Toy Day” at the Cape Fear Jetport back home in SPT to which I’ve been able to take them previously and they’d really enjoyed, so it was a good time!

Thursday night I went to the local carnival in Mt Airy with Katie’s fam and bumped into some other old friends, Tanya & Ray M, including their daughter Brynn, one of MacKenzie’s chums who is of course now 30(?!) and works in the education system like Katie. Honestly, as much as I tried to enjoy the time with the family I felt “off” and couldn’t shake it. Afterwards I went to sit on the memorial bench another friend had created and placed in Wildwood Park for MacKenzie some years ago (~2011?) and while driving to my farm camp, basking in the sunset over the farmland - such a favorite view of Kathy’s - I contemplated how they both should’ve been there. 💔

Each night after the boyz hit the rack, I would go meet with somebody else from my past, including another 3AM visit with Byron R, a close friend from the Men’s group that originally started pulling me towards Christ back in 2009/10 and Dave D & his wife Lin with whom I’d worked in MD in 2002-05. Dave & I had remained in touch and met occasionally over the years during the train wreck that became of my life from 2005-12 (BK - Before Kathy) and although I wasn’t aware at the time, he’d thankfully been sewing Christ-centered seeds into my life.🙌🏻 One of my many dedicated friends, he rode his motorcycle down from MD to SPT for Kathy’s Living Tribute on March 9.

Friday was lunch and a walk in the woods with Vinny and Maria D (friends since early 2000s when Vin-man introduced Lauren to Lacrosse, which became a staple in her life beyond college). He’s quite the photographer and I’d forgotten he’d been making photo albums for years. He pulled out the ones he had made back in 2015 with a lot of pictures of the kayaking trip the four of us had taken to the Shenandoah River over Memorial Day, one of Kathy’s favorite places, and which had become a Mem Day tradition for the two of us as we moved from tent to trailer camping. He also shared all the pictures he taken during our wedding at the US Navy Academy Chapel on August 1, 2015. This guy is SO dedicated, right after taking the pictures he had at least one of them printed and matted, then proceeded to have everyone at our reception sign it, frame it and present it to us later that evening! It still hangs in our bedroom in SPT and I’ve looked at it every night before going to bed at home. 💜

Saturday Dave D had invited me to join his Church Men’s retreat up in Southern PA so I drove the two hours via numerous little towns and beautiful mountain roads. We had fellowship with some heartfelt discussion, and although they didn’t refer to it as such, all the teachings were based on the 12 Steps of CR (Celebrate Recovery), in which I have participated off on since 2010-ish! 🙌🏻💪🏻💜 We had a few meals together and even some “brass therapy” as another friend calls it (firearms practice)😬 after which I drove back to the Catoctin Mtns in MD to have dinner with Wendy & Bill G, one of Kathy’s closest friends from her teaching days.

Sunday I had “breakfast” (rather an incredible FEAST) early with my old church Men’s group, dubbed MWWJ (Men Walking With Jesus) in Mark M’s huge “barn,” followed by joining Mike & Michele R at their church, Damascus Road Community Church (DRCC) which gratefully is very much like Generations back home in in SPT. “M & M” are old neighbors who’d also come down for Kathy’s Living Tribute. Michele and Kath were quite close and had been scheduled to go on a trip to Israel together in 2020 before Covid shut the world down and we ended up moving South. It would’ve been nice if they could’ve done that together as planned…

That afternoon I headed up to my Cousin Wendy & Paige’s, NW of Philly. I was hoping to stay in their driveway that night, but simply didn’t feel I could safely get the AS backed in given the width of the street and the traffic in the area. Albeit short, that visit was long overdue, Kath & I only having visited once since marriage. I’d hoped to find somewhere to camp nearby via Harvest Host or Hipcamp, but nojoy so I continued N towards the Pocono Mtns to get closer to Kathy’s brother Andy’s place.

I found something as close as I could to Andy & wife Terry Z’s that still had some availability and finally arrived at a KOA in the Poconos just as they were closing at 10PM. I was almost there when the cell phone NAV solution dropped due to signal loss so had to pull over and plug the data into the 8 yr old Tundra’s NAV system, which gratefully guided me there in the VERY dark night. 🙌🏻 Honestly, I am NOT trying to make a habit of late night arrivals in unfamiliar places. I don’t need that additional stress.😰

All in all it was a crazy busy week and I’m grateful a few friends checked in on me late Sunday & Monday AM which spurred me to summarize some of what I’ve been journaling each day to start posting “activity” more formally.

I’ll shoot for a Week 2 update early next week. #LiveEveryDay

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Why Life3.0? I guess a bit of a prologue is in order.

I was raised in the suburbs of Los Angeles, from the late 60s into the mid-80s, graduated from the US Naval Academy in Engineering and attended flight school in Pensacola, Florida becoming an “Unrestricted Naval Aviator” the first week of 1990. That’s how Navy trained helicopter pilots are described because unlike the Army & Air Force, historically in the Naval Aviation training program, which also trains Marine Corps & Coast Guard Aviators, we learn to fly fixed-wing first, including Solo Aerobatics, Formation and Instruments before transitioning on to either carrier-based jets, multi engine land based aircraft or rotary-wing (helicopters). I was selected to fly the Navy’s version of the H-60, the Seahawk, and as the only Helo squadron in the Carrier Airwing we handled too many mission types to count, in the SH-60F ASW (AntiSubmarine Warfare) & HH-60H CSAR (Combat Search & Rescue) variants. During that part of my life, I had two daughters, conducted a few summer deployments to the Persian Gulf, not the ideal season for that part of the world, and made a quick trip to Mogadishu in October ‘93 in response to the actions largely documented in the book and movie “Blackhawk Down.” Following that sea tour I did a flight instruction tour, also in San Diego and exited the Navy in mid ‘90s largely due to family needs, frustration with the apparent lack of meritocracy in promotion & compensation, and because our primary adversary for which we trained, the Soviets, kind of “disappeared” which caused the services to do a little bit of “wandering” for a while. I entered the civilian workforce in the technology sector in Seattle, relocating to Portland, OR ~1.3 yrs later to join the Intel Corp, ended up in the DC Metro area by mid-2000 and ultimately had two more daughters. The marriage was up and down at times but in late 2005 my third child was diagnosed with Medulloblastoma (brain cancer), a journey involving multiple repeat tumors, several surgeries by the great Dr. Ben Carson, consuming five years, resulting in her untimely death at 13 and in parallel, a rather nasty divorce. I generally refer to all of this as Life1.0.

Life2.0 began with my trying to:

1) Stay aloft financially in the face of a rather onerous divorce sentence,

2) Become a part time single parent while still working rather long hours in a successful, yet demanding & under-resourced environment, and

3) Figure out what a healthy “relationship” might look like. Given the “mid-air collision” from which I had emerged, the latter involved some rather unhealthy behavior - shocker! Note I did NOT mention “heal from the death of my daughter,” more on that later.

By the grace of God some outstanding men of faith pursued me and pulled me into their circle which slowly started to change my heart. I’d always been a “believer” but as one of my new found friends pointed out, rather sharply, “even the Devil believes in Jesus!” This realization blew me away, and I slowly came to learn mere “belief” did not encompass trust in Him or seeking to follow His ways.

My growing relationship with the Lord led me to Kathy, an amazingly optimistic, fun-loving, caring and golden-hearted woman. He absolutely put us together which is its own story, and pursuing Kathy drove me to truly want to follow Jesus. Kathy thankfully became my wife in 2015, greatly assisting and encouraging me in the building of my relationship with the Lord. In 2020 during the height of COVID she retired from teaching & we moved south to the quaint town of Southport, NC. Part of our relocation involved a shift from the Christian denominations in which we’d been raised, finding a wonderful non-denominational Bible-based church through which we learned loads about the very good evidence for the Truth presented by Biblical Christianity, a field known as Christian Apologetics. Our fascination with the field lead to rapid knowledge growth and clarity that had not managed to “sink in” through our various “denominational” Christian experiences. Kathy & I both decided independently to truly accept God’s free gift of Salvation and I noticed in time that a number of behaviors I had practiced and always felt guilty about afterwards, no longer had power over me - I really did start to change! In the coming years we publicly professed our faith & were baptized. The church family and the true joy we’d found in doing our best to follow and point others to Christ, though regularly stumbling, resulted in blessings too rich to count.

Throughout 2024 the earth began to shift under our feet and Kathy encountered a number of GI-related difficulties. In late December of that year she was diagnosed with Cholangiocarcinoma, specifically Gallbladder cancer. Kathy fought hard for 15 months, which included travel to multiple states with hospitalizations at 6 different facilities across 4 hospital systems, yet sadly resulted in her passing on March 24, 2026. While “only” together for 14 years and married for 10 years, 7 months and 24 days, I fully realize we lived a journey of blessings many do not experience in a lifetime. I suspect that the end of Life1.0, sometimes to which I referred as “my dual engine failure at night over water,” one of the worst possible emergencies in a Naval aircraft, drove me to attempt to “drink all that was possible from the fire hydrant of life” and Kath had been game for all of it. We camped, hiked, biked, and kayaked all up and down the east coast, trekked across the northern part of the country by car, visited as many National Parks as we could manage and made a river cruise across much of Europe only a month prior to her diagnosis. Kath was a tremendously animated, creative and independent woman with the knack for tackling any project; be it designing and sewing clothing, quilts, window treatments or pillows; to refurbishing old furniture; to designing & redecorating a room or the entire yard. She’d let me help at times but it was always clear that she was more than willing and able to do it on her own!

Even though I’ve been doing my best to follow Jesus, I can’t say I really “hear God speak to me,” yet I’ve come to discern three times that I’ve lashed out in a fit of frustration only to be presented with an “idea” that clearly could not have been my own.

• The first one was March 16, 2012 when I angrily swore off “dating” and God put it in my head to call a phone number that I’d known was Kathy’s some ten years prior, yet had suspected was no longer.

• The second was Dec 20, 2024 when she when her cancer was initially detected and I cried out as to “WHY I was going through this again?!” I immediate had the “thought” that it was better for her to go through such a battle with someone experienced, rather than with a novice or worse yet, alone.

• The most recent was the night in Raleigh in late Feb of this year when Hospice became the only logical choice for Kath. After she fell asleep I returned to my hotel room alone and I cried out in a fit of frustration & anger with God “Why did you even bother introducing us if it was going to be such a short amount of time?!” The very next “thought” that passed through my head was “Because she brought you to Me.” I crumpled up the floor and knew in my heart it was true. Kathy had brought me home to The Lord and sadly for us on earth, her tasking complete, she was truly being called Home herself.

As such, Life3.0 is “sans Kathy,” a gaping wound, and not currently a great place to be.

Part of being thrust into Life3.0 is discovering that I never properly grieved the loss of my third child, or frankly my very close friend Steve R. from High School who was consumed during college by the precise brain cancer that hit MacKenzie 18 years later.

What could I do to address all of this?

On top of the tsunami of grief, I realized that I had experienced the blessing of having been gainfully employed non-stop since two weeks out of high school at age 17 in 1984 and I’ll be turning 60 in September. I no longer had any pressing legal or financial obligations so after much prayer and consultation with numerous individuals wiser than myself, decided to leave my job of 19.5 yrs & take a much needed break, a sabbatical of sorts. I thought it would be appropriate to take a trip about which Kathy & I had been musing once I could retire in ~5 years - dragging our Airstream trailer around the country to see as much as could be seen.

The difference now is the purpose. Now my goal is to revisit the places we enjoyed together, see the sites to which I’d intended to introduce her, and also the ones I’d hoped we would discover together, while reconnecting with friends and family along the way.

Ultimately the purpose of this trek is healing, discovery & hope - all with an eye for a future that contains meaning & builds God’s kingdom on earth. 🙏🏻

Thanks for reading & I sincerely hope I can help you see the blessings God has for you, all around you, and that you too will come to see the value in making the most important decision of your life - one to follow Jesus Christ. 💜🙌🏻

“Heaven Changes Everything” by Big Daddy Weave

For Kathy’s complete cancer journey, please feel free to go back and read my chronicling at CaringBridge.org. My goal beyond merely sharing that which we were experiencing was to educate what we learned as we lived it, in hopes that someone else might be helped:

https://www.caringbridge.org/site/5743573c-c6e6-11ef-af6d-c36c378abfeb