Hello there dear readers of The Uplift,

I intended to write to you once more before the end of 2025 but I leant into relaxation for the final part of the year. Now, January is here and I feel inspired to write after a joyful few days. How are you? Let me know in the comments below!

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A lot of my freelance work has finished or hours have been cut at the end of the year so I’ve managed to have a proper break over Christmas and New Year, which has felt great and needed. Since I last wrote to you, I spent Christmas with family in London, back to Brighton for a couple of days, before Canterbury for my mum’s birthday. I had a cosy and fun night in with a couple of friends in Brighton on New Year’s Eve. New Year’s Day featured a big lie in before the first sea swim in months, next to Brighton Pier at sunset, where we enjoyed starling murmurations afterwards.

I’m feeling extremely joyful at the moment, savouring the sunshine, stars and moon. I am enjoying walks with friends, cuppas, smiling at strangers and dogs in the park and trying to make my home homely and cosy. What’s bringing you joy at the moment?

Uplifting News Stories

Veteran wins £155k after ‘really bad year’ | BBC News

44 good news stories to start 2026 with optimism | El Pais

My Faith In Humanity Was Slightly Restored When I Finally Read Some GOOD NEWS Happening In The World Right Now | BuzzFeed

25 good things that happened in 2025 | Mashable

The top 25 good news stories of 2025 | Positive News

Worth Sharing

The secret to being happy in 2026? It’s far, far simpler than you think … | The Guardian

The only resolution I am making this year | Beth Kempton

A New Year Ritual | A Pilgrimage For The Soul

Black trailblazers who died in 2025 | Black Current News

Threshold: the choir who sing to the dying - documentary | The Guardian

Seven night sky spectacles to watch for in 2026 | BBC Weather

The Year of The Horse Will Favour The Bold | InStyle

I’d love to hear what you’d like to receive from The Uplift in 2026. What do you like about it? What would make it better? Let me know in the comments below or reply to this email. If you enjoyed my newsletter, you are welcome to buy me a coffee 🧡

Wishing you a joyful 2026!

BB xx

Dear readers of The Uplift,

It is Christmas Eve and I have just opened one of the cheeses I am taking to my sister’s for Christmas tomorrow and made myself up a little plate of cheese and crackers. I knew I should have taken them round when I visited today to resist temptation but never mind!

For the past five years, I’ve been lucky enough to to cat sits or stay in friends-on-holiday’s homes in north London near enough my sister’s to engage in the family festivities and also have my own space. I’m now onto a little plate of two mini mince pies, looking at a simply and tastefully decorated real Christmas tree and listening to instrumental-only Christmas tunes.

I think this year I’m having the most suited-to-me Christmas yet. Hardly any presents, I haven’t done cards and I avoided Christmas music (except two lovely festive gatherings) until December 22. That meant on the drive from London to Brighton, I really enjoyed listening and singing along to a festive playlist.

Since I last wrote to you in November, most significantly, I have completed The Artist’s Way 12-week programme, facilitated by the wonderful Marianne Power. My favourite thing to come out of that is a newfound love of collaging, as well as meeting new and inspiring people. I’m looking forward to doing it again with Marianne on Tuesdays from January 20. Watch this space. Before then, Marianne is running some Goodbye 2025, Hello 2026 workshops, using the fabulous Selina Barker’s Goodbye Hello journal.

Other things that have kept me going through some bleak Winter days include trips to Wakehurst.

And Stanmer Park, Brighton.

Things That Have Brought Me Joy

• Giving into targeted advertising and buying one of these weighted sloths

• Attending my friend Sarah Weiler’s new exercise class PsyFit

• Having my wish granted at incredible immersive show The Gift. My review here.

• Attending Donna Lancaster’s Soulful Sunday

• Having these three children in my life!

Uplifting News Stories

Cafe set to serve free Christmas meals | BBC News

Couple of 22 years get engaged after impromptu proposal | Kent Online

8 projects empowering people this Christmas | Positive News

Hundreds brave the cold for charity | ITV News

The Good Climate News That Happened in 2025 | Bloomberg

Welcome to the Lemon-Shaped Planet Where Rain Turns to Diamonds | Good News Network

Terminally ill 81-year-old graduates from university | BBC News

Worth Sharing

Acclaimed ‘Barrel Children’ documentary now available to stream | Black Current News

Loneliness at Christmas - Part 1 | Donna Lancaster

Loneliness at Christmas - Part 2 | Donna Lancaster

2026: what will you be doubling down on? | The Hyphen by Emma Gannon

Hack Your Happiness In 6 Steps | Wisdom Waves with Vex King

‘Dr Radha on how to get through’... Christmas and New Year

What is possible in the stillness? | Carousel by Sarah Weiler

Grief Support by Amy Firth

I am pretty f*cking amazing - and so are you. | Marianne Power

Sarah Barker is running The Grief Space on February 7

OK that’s it from me, for now…

I hope to write to you again very soon. We shall see.

Wishing you a peaceful Yuletide however you spend it.

BB xx

One of the invitations in Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way, a 12-week course I am currently undertaking, is a ‘No-Read Week’. Julia suggests abstaining from reading and consuming media like TV, social media, and podcasts for a week. I decided to make my own version and set the intention to take a pause from WhatsApp and social media for a week and to watch no TV. I had to still use WhatsApp and social media for my freelance work and then I let my nearest and dearest know I would be offline and archived all chats.

It was hard.

The first day I noticed how much I reach for my phone for comfort… to scroll… to check… to message. I stopped myself and began to gain a new found awareness of how much I was reaching for my phone.

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Well hello again,

It seems doing The Artist’s Way is having an impact as I notice myself writing to you more. It feels good.

This week, I’ve found myself in a bit of a depression. I haven’t been able to work out if I am physically unwell or whether I just can’t do a big night out on a Saturday any more without taking a week to recover, or whether I still need to deep clean old dust and cat hair from my new home. I think it’s a combination of all. And other things. Training to be a therapist for one, is pretty full on.

I was meant to go away this weekend but a few days ago I cancelled even though I didn’t want to let down my friends. I realised that on Friday - my day in London - I would be leaving my home in Brighton at 8am and my course runs until 9pm. It was the right decision. After getting home after 11pm, I had almost 12 hours sleep last night and I’m so grateful I had the space to do so.

After the mammoth sleep, I felt Wakehurst, a beautiful gardens and 500 acres of land owned by Kew Gardens, but in Sussex, call my name. I decided to take myself there on an Artist’s Date, which is part of the weekly commitment of doing the Artist’s Way (by Julia Cameron) 12-week course, which I am doing alongside a wonderful group run by the brilliant author Marianne Power.

As I drove the 40 minutes to Ardingly, I listened to the audiobook of Mythos by Stephen Fry, which is a gorgeous retelling of the Greek myths. I am gripped and it feels like such a gift to myself to listen. The drive from Brighton to Wakehurst is stunning; rolling green Sussex Downs and an abundance of trees undergoing their Autumnal transformation. Trailing over viewpoint Ditchling Beacon and then landing in Haywards Heath, I had to resist the pull to the charity shops.

I am a member of Wakehurst and on arrival I felt selfish disappointment that there were so many people there. My schedule is flexible so I have sometimes been on a weekday when it is more empty and of course on a Saturday, there are many families. However, Wakehurst is huge and there are still secret pockets to be found for leaning on trees and talking to pheasants. I made a beeline to the Stables Cafe to buy myself a jacket potato but disastrously had missed the hot food window. Refusing to pay £7 for a browning egg sandwich, I decided the most filling cost-effective option would be an oat Chai latte, which felt warming and Autumnal.

I usually head straight to the trees but I challenged myself to choose a different direction and ended up in the glorious Asian Heath Garden, where I enjoyed passing smiles and short conversations with strangers. I revelled in being by myself - I love the presence I can give myself when I am alone. I sat on a bench with my notebook and some words flowed through me.

A first look at Autumn

I am surrounded by love
The lull of birdsong kisses my ears
I take a sharp intake of breath
As I see the Autumn colours
Close to the threshold
Green turns to red
Gold, ochre
I breathe them in and savour
Soon the leaves will be gone and death will prevail
But right now the trees almost blossom, resplendent
One last hurrah, before silence, death, sleep
The robin joins me, curious, nimble, proud
Aware of my focus
A carpet of pink and white flowers
Teases the promise of Spring

Asian Heath Garden

I could sit here forever
Bathed in the glory of this abundant dream
Wash of clear stream flows
A delighted child squeals
”I’d forgotten how nice it is here,” a soft Scottish voice in an orange jumper passes by
Parents with papooses, pushchairs
A tapestry of birdsong
I am protected by the oak

After relaxing into the joy of big groups of people and the passing words and giggles of small children (I’m feeling very inward today). I snuck off to the quieter part of the grounds to visit my favourite tree at Wakehurst; a huge cedar beyond a steep path down to the valley. As I walked that way, the sun began to break through the clouds for the first time today (unless that happened this morning when I was sleeping). As I approached Cedrus, the sun broke through and golden hour made an appearance. I wrote this.

Late arrival

And then she arrived
Late in the day
Golden light through the trees
Shadows of trunks
Flashes of yellow
And stillness
An appearance before Nix’s blanket takes hold

Then I spent a little while resting with Cedrus and wrote something else.

Sitting with Cedrus

I sit alone in the folds of your ancient trunk
Admiring your bowing, heavy branches
As golden sunlight breaks through clouds for the first time today
I wonder if the money spider is still dancing in my hair
A mouse darts into the folds of verdant undergrowth where earth meets ferns,
Branches bow to roots

Stillness and aliveness together
Rays kiss my face as I lean into your wisdom,
In awe of the beauty
A carpet of acorns, fertile, wet, soft, hard earth

I remember to look up as well as down
And for a moment allow myself to revel in your layers
Your years of protection
Secrets and stories
And allow myself to be held

On the walk back to the exit, I saw several pheasants, sprouting fungi and wild deer. On the way home, there was a striking sunset and I listened to the next chapter of The Artist’s Way. Now, I’m home and snuggled under a cosy blanket I bought myself this week.

If you’ve given my words a read, thanks. I’m not a huge fan of poetry to be honest and I haven’t scrubbed or polished these offerings. I’m currently just letting whatever needs to flow, flow through me and putting it out there! I hope they inspire you to connect with yourself, or with nature or just to give something a go! Feel free to let me know your honest thoughts. Or if you skipped the words, I hope you liked the pictures!

No good news highlights today, but I was particularly struck by this story about a Monarch Butterfly being given a wing transplant.

Dying monarch butterfly saved by daring wing transplant | Interesting Engineering

Wishing you a nourishing weekend,

BB x

If you enjoyed this free email and would like to buy me a coffee, you can do so here.

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Dear readers,

I am currently on An Artist’s Date as part of Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way 12-week course, which I started last Tuesday alongside a group run by the amazing author Marianne Power. If you don’t know already, The Artist’s Way is a book and a self-led course originally launched in 1992. Elizabeth Gilbert credits The Artist’s Way for Eat, Pray, Love and among the millions of other people who rate it, include Emma Gannon, Anne Lamott and Martin Scorsese. The “basic tools” of The Artist’s Way are Morning Pages: three A4 stream-of-consciousness pages of writing first thing in the morning, and an artist date: a block of time - ideally two hours weekly to set aside to nurture your inner artist.

I’ve started reading the book, and done morning pages for good chunks of time, quite a few times. The notion of artist’s dates, alongside Selina Barker and Vicki Pavitt’s former podcast Project Love, and the work of Francesca Specter, who coined the term Alonement and Nicola Slawson of The Single Supplement helped me get to a place in my life where I enjoy time alone (and sometimes I need reminding!) However, going solo on a 12-week course doesn’t feel achievable for me. Having the accountability of 20-something others as well as Marianne and another facilitator feels hopeful.

I’ve been writing my morning pages all week but was struggling to make time for an artist date, amid the piles of unpacking in my new home, work I’d fallen a bit behind on and navigating this new chapter. Today, Sunday, at 2pm, I decided to take a walk around the block as I’d only just showered and dressed (I celebrated my birthday (early!) last night with local friends). After a 10-minute turn around the local roads, I remembered a vast cemetery, a stone’s throw away from my new place, and made the decision to venture there on an impromptu artist date

I love graveyards and cemeteries. Often swathes of headstones, a solid symbol of death and grief, are overrun with abundant life. Flowers, birds, and trees flourish in these often still and silent places. Death and life. I adore savouring the names, the history, the tributes of love and family. I find these places a reminder of the fragility of life and a wake up call of my own mortality and a reminder to savour my “wild and precious” life.

This trip to the cemetery included seeing Jays (my favourite bird that to me feels hopeful and joyful) four times, a wondering of what people might write on my gravestone if I had one and in that moment looking down and seeing a stone saying “A special auntie” and a little tear coming to my eye, and I also came across an abundant and colourful rose garden, which felt like a joyful surprise on a cold September day.

For the whole of the artist’s date, I didn’t go on my phone, but I did use it to take photos.

About an hour into my date with death, I felt inspired to write a stream-of-consciousness poem into my phone. I then wrote two more.

Two Jays

The trees are whispering

Can you hear?

Stillness in death, love sleep

Life springs from this landscape of death

I am alive

Bramble rises across cold hard stone, cracked

The flash of a blue jay’s feather. Gratitude

Magpies. Curiosity

Breeze holds me as fears pass through

Yellow flowers, mowed brown lawn.

Trees

Faded fake flowers, angels, stone roses

I follow the path

At the highest point, amid birdsong and the hum of the roads afar

I can see the rolling hills, a glimpse of the sea

Children playing

In this moment, two jays fly past

A gift, a remembering

Solace and togetherness

Secret Rose Garden

Somehow the roses are budding and flourishing

Under this cold, grey and blank late September sky

I gasp as I turn the corner to a field of colour

Flowery powdery scent of roses

Oranges, pinks, red, yellow, white

Even purple, pink

Windmills blowing in the breeze

The flow of water

Burgundy

Tributes of love and loss

Baby Andrew

Nanny

Husband

Dad

“We will never forget him”

“To live in hearts we leave behind is not to die”

When I die

When I die

Please don’t write”

“She fell asleep”

Please don’t write”

“Reunited”

I hope you will say”

“She was funny and kind,

“She smiled at strangers,

“A special auntie,

“A joyful friend.”

I hope you will recall:

“She lived from the heart,

“She seized the day,

“She could laugh at herself,

“She sang.

“She danced,

“She wrote,

“She laughed,

“She hugged,

“She loved herself…

“And she lived a life of truth.”

“And she cherished flowers, animals and trees… Picked up stones, shells and feathers.

“Recharged in nature, especially the sea.”

I hope one day I peacefully slow down in gratitude.

I hope my hair continues to grey.

I hope my eyes crinkle and never stop sparkling.

I hope I remember I am alive until I am dead.

The Artist’s Way is “A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity”. I’m enjoying it.

After the cemetery, I had a bit more time. I wandered some more local streets, met a cat, read some graffiti, noticed street art.

Then I picked up a cookery book from a pile of free stuff, called: “How not to die.”

For the final part of my two hours, I decided to write… this.

I know it is not my usual newsletter but I’m going to send it anyway.

Usual Uplifts will be coming soon.

Have a wonderful week,

BB x

Well hello there dear subscribers of The Uplift,

Yet again… it’s been a while… Six months since I last wrote.

It’s somehow been around four and a half years since I first started this newsletter, after being made redundant from HuffPost UK. Since then, I’ve worked a couple of other jobs pretty short-term before going freelance, and alongside that undertaken two years of deep-diving, experiential training. I sold my flat in London in March 2023 and embarked on an unknown adventure of where I might live next. My Trusted Housesitters review count now stands at 25 (all five stars, I’ll humbly add), including a cat sit Mexico in 2023, and I spent some time at my mum’s near Canterbury, Kent, where I fell deeply in love with the woods, foraging and birdsong.

I now find myself in Brighton for nearly two years, with at least four addresses, two evictions (Section 21/property guardianship sold), a few sofa, cat sits and spare rooms stays under my belt. In just a few days, I will move into my own flat here in this city.

Somehow, I’ve made a home here in Brighton with my only ties being a community of lovely friends and a long-term relationship with the sea. In the coming days and weeks, I will retrieve the scatterings of my life stored in friend’s garages and sheds, and from my mum and sister’s spare rooms, in the hope of making 426 square feet, one bed flat look relatively minimalistic and feel like home. The big decision at the moment is whether to give everything unwanted to charity or try and make some much-needed cash back by attempting to sell stuff. Maybe the answer is both.

So, of course as this to-do list hangs over me, I turn to my slightly dormant newsletter in the hope of bringing it back to life.

There have been many times I have intended to write to you but sometimes I find myself floored… by my own procrastination… by the news… by the unfathomable genocide in Palestine… humanitarian disasters in Sudan, Yemen, Myanmar, and the Democratic Republic of Congo, by the violence, the racism, the despair on UK soil. After more than 11 years in journalism, where I checked the headlines as soon as I woke up, through the day and last thing at night, I now live a life where news apps have not been on my phone for longer than I can remember. I have the privilege of picking and choosing when I want to consume and when I want to turn it off. And so, I wonder how a newsletter that intends to spread good news, fits within this landscape. How do we live our everyday lives with our own struggles, with everything else going on in the wider world? But here I am and here we are.

As the Autumn evenings draw in, I hope something here brings you joy. My September intention is to write more regularly so let’s see what happens.

Things That Have Brought Me Joy

• It’s been about six weeks since I’ve seen my treasured three niblings… but receiving photos like this brings me much joy… During term time, I will see them much more ❤️

• Meeting new babies, seeing friends, celebrating birthdays including an absolutely epic 40th

• Sitting and singing around fires

• Admiring the moon

• Binge-watching Lena Dunham’s Too Much on Netflix

• The Meet Cutes Instagram accounts

• A solo spa day at Alexander House Spa (somehow got a super cheap August deal!)

• An impromptu trip to Wakehurst on the way home (see above)

• Having fresh sunflowers in the house wherever I was living for the whole of Summer

• Buying myself flowers after a difficult medical appointment. Soon after, I decided I didn’t like the colours, but they have blossomed a week later on the cusp of death.

• A Soulful Sunday, and a silent sisterhood walk organised by Donna Lancaster

• Accidentally getting consumed by mud and uncontrollable laughter on a walk with a friend (my George at Asda trousers also bringing me joy). Also discovered on my course summer residential that all therapists seem to wear Birkenstocks.

• Washing and hoovering my car was also surprisingly satisfying. Changing the reverse light lightbulb, filling the oil and screen wash myself thanks the encouragement of my boyfriend (😱 ❤️)

• Browsing Dunelm Mill and planning what bits I might get for my new home (while having the self control not to impulse buy).

Uplifting News Stories

Runner, 97, breaks European parkrun record with 250th event | BBC News

Pets make you as happy as a £70,000 pay rise, research suggests | Countryfile

Small, Easy Acts of Joy Mean Big Gains in Happiness | Scientific American

Brain implant lets man 'experience joy' for the first time in decades | New Scientist

Cats may hold key to treating human cancer, scientists say | The Independent

Worth Sharing

How photography is helping Gazan refugees rebuild their lives | Positive News

Experience: I am the world porridge-making champion | The Guardian

Brighton People | The Plastic Coast | Wombshine | Afrori Books | Stanmer Sauna Garden | Salvaged In Bermuda | Ecstatic Dance Brighton | Urban Forage

How People In Brighton Can Support Palestinians | We Love Brighton

Fresh Clothes, Fresh Start: Matched Giving Appeal | Catching Lives

20 daily fitness habits for busy people | The i

Is it OK to be happy when the world is falling apart? | The Guardian

Connection Jam | September

Also, these mushroom supplements have changed my life (not an ad!)

Things I Am Looking Forward To

• Having my own home

• A weekend away with friends

• Seeing my niblings hopefully soon

• Autumnal walks

• Ru Paul’s Drag Race UK Season 7 starting soon

• My birthday this month!

• Another friend’s new baby to meet soon ❤️

OK, that’s it from me for now. If you enjoyed this newsletter, please let me know by clicking the little heart below and also feel free to share something that is bringing you joy right now or an uplifting news story.

Also, I’ve managed to get my Ko-fi working again, so if you’d like to buy me a coffee, the link is here.

With love,

BB xx

Well hello there,

It’s been a while! I’ve had my head down with my therapy studies and somewhat cocooning over winter. It feels good to be “picking up the pen” to write to you again, though.

A few weeks ago, I had the joy of attending the book launch of my friend and former colleague Nicola Slawson, who was celebrating the publication of her book Single: Living a Complete Life on Your Own Terms. I’d been lucky enough to already have read a proof copy as I’m featured in it but it was good to pick up a physical copy and celebrate Nicola’s incredible achievement. I also got to meet her gorgeous baby for the first time, hang out with her wonderful best friend co-parent Tom, catch up with old colleagues and meet some lovely new people too.

Read more from Nicola: I had a baby with my gay best friend – here’s why it’s the perfect arrangement | The Telegraph

Single is a joyful, moving and powerful book about life for single people; the pros and cons, and issues faced, with lots of examples of single people living a complete life on their own terms. Nicola has created, grown and nurtured a community around her newsletter The Single Supplement, which has helped change the narrative for single people as well as forged new friendships and uplifting stories.

This week for The Uplift, Nicola has answered my Life Advice questions. Thank you so much for taking part Nicola. Go buy her book!

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

When I was going through a terrible heartbreak, I was on a yoga retreat and the teacher was talking about the practice of non-attachment, surrender and letting go of things that don't serve you. Thinking of my ex, who I was still having daily video calls with, I asked her how to let go when it felt so painful.

At the time I was holding a water bottle and she pointed out the effort it was taking to hold onto the bottle – I was using arm and hand muscles etc in order to hold it. She told me to let go of the bottle and, of course, my body was no longer putting effort into holding it.

My muscles had relaxed. I realised how positive and freeing it can be to let go. Holding on was more painful in the long run. I wrote about this story in my book and writing it made me realise how much I have come back to that advice in all sorts of different situations – work problems, friendship woes, and living situations – and it's always served me well.

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

I wish I could go back to when I was 31 and really panicking about feeling left behind by my friends who were all settling down, getting married, buying houses and either having children or thinking about it. I felt so out of sync and like a failure.

I wish I could give her a big hug and let her know it's going to be OK and that she needs to remember the advice in Baz Luhrmann's Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen) when he said: "Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself."

What's your best life advice for other people?

If you're single, you don't need to find a partner in order for your life to start. You're already living it so you may as well do what makes you feel joyful instead of letting yourself feel like you're in a waiting room and focusing on what you're lacking.

If you're not single, the same advice applies – you don't have to wait for all the circumstances to be perfect before you decide to go after what you want in life whether that be relocating, a career change, starting a business, having a baby, going on that holiday you have always dreamed of etc.

To steal my parents' motto: "One Life. Live it."

What inspired your latest book and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

My book is a culmination of everything I’ve learned since starting it. It explores the highs and lows of being unattached in a world designed for couples and encourages readers to find joy and make the most of their lives, single or not. I interviewed more than 50 people for the book from all walks of life and have been told there is something for everyone in it!

If you are thinking of buying it, maybe it would help to hear about what people are saying about it. It’s only been out a short time but I’ve already had messages saying it made people feel seen or less alone. A few people have said it’s like I got inside their brain because they related so much. It’s been called “fiercely honest and comforting” by the Irish Independent and “a joyful read” by Stylist.

Read more from Nicola: My 10 year anniversary of being single | The Single Supplement

More Life Advice

Marianne Power - "Go to bed and have a massive nap"

Melissa Hemsley - “Be unapologetically and gloriously you”

Sally Abé - "Trust your instincts, they are there for a reason."

Sarah Ockwell-Smith - "Be less bothered by what other people think of you."

Donna Lancaster - "All roads lead to Love, if you let them."

Monique Roffey - "Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life"

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

Until next time,

BB X

Dear Uplift readers,

It’s been a while since I wrote a classic Uplift to you - this is the first since July. As I navigated a challenging time, I kept things ticking with some fabulous life advice editions - from Donna Lancaster, Sarah Ockwell-Smith, Sally Abé, Melissa Hemsley and Marianne Power. I am so grateful to those wonderful women and hope you took something from their wise words. As a New Year approaches, I feel like I am coming out the other side of a tricky period and it feels good to be writing to you again.

One thing that inspired me to write was someone in a Brighton sea swimming WhatsApp group sharing these two beautiful photos. Thank you to Carrie Petitt for giving me permission to share them.

I live five minutes walk from the sea and when I feel heavy or stuck, it really helps to just go to sea. I haven’t done as much sea swimming as last Winter but I plan to make the most of my final month in this home and swim in, sit by, or walk along the sea as much as possible whatever the weather.

In the past week, I have twice savoured the starling murmurations at the pier at sunset. I learnt that the starlings do these breathtaking movements - because they are dancing and because they enjoy it. I am so in awe of nature and so grateful to live in Brighton. Here’s a little snippet.

Also, the photo at the top of this newsletter shows a stunning rainbow cloud I spotted above the sea this week. Where are the places you go when you need to shift your energy or emotions? I’d love to hear in the comments below.

Things That Have Brought Me Joy

• Sophie Howarth’s Lighting The Dark advent calendar - you can still sign up here

• An EFT and reiki session with the multi-talented Jess Nicks

• This epic Christmas special at my favourite brunch spot Moksha Caffe (extra hash brown on the side too!)

  

• Singing Christmas carols and enjoying my first mince pie of the season with my pal Sarah Weiler at the Friends of Queen’s Park carols

• Mulled wine, more mince pies and singing with friends the next evening

• The Grief Space workshop with Donna Lancaster. Donna and Gabi Krueger are running an awakening retreat in January. I cannot recommend Donna and Gabi enough.

• Happiness circles run by the amazing Vicky Johnson, founder of Museum of Happiness.

• Gratitude pratice with my friends Leasa and Aurora.

Uplifting News Stories

LEGO Launches New Toys Representing Children With Hidden Disabilities | HuffPost UK

Hawaiian crow that went extinct in the wild decades ago released on Maui | The Guardian

Cutting-edge tech is guiding nature restoration in the UK’s forests | Positive News

Worth Sharing

People Dem Collective are losing their home and need your help

'Why I spent £85k of my own money to help fix Britain's housing crisis' | BBC News

Eight steps to de-escalate difficult dinner table conversations | The i

Forty and single | The Single Supplement

Do you practise Conversational Consent? | Carousel by Sarah Weiler

Connection Jam dates are here for January, February and March

Thank you for reading. If you’ve enjoyed reading this newsletter, please consider donating to the Catching Lives Winter Appeal.

Until next time and sending love,

BB x

Hi friends,

I’m still not 100% and haven’t written properly in a while. This week, the fabulous author Marianne Power has answered The Uplift’s live advice questions for you. Her latest book Love Me! One Woman's Search for a Different Happy Ever is out now and also available on audiobook for Spotify subscribers.

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

It's advice from the poet Mary Oliver 'things take the time they take, don't worry...' I mean I don't listen to it at all, worry constantly about how long things take me and whether I'm going to earn enough to pay the rent this month... and yet that phrase is in my head most days. I sense that it really is true, whether it comes to work, love, health... 

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

Save the money I earned from my first book Help Me! It took me four years to finish, I moved back in with my mum and dad to write it and then lots of international deals came in. I thought the good times would roll forever - they didn't! I wish, wish, wish I had saved more money when I had it. 

What's your best life advice for other people?

Rest. I look at all of us hooked to screens, burned out and worrying and I want to tell us all to go to bed and have a massive nap. I am always telling people to rest. I have been diagnosed with long covid and have spent many months in my bed - it's been financially horrible and really stressful, but the time out has also been a blessing in some ways. 

What inspired your latest book and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

Love Me! One Woman's Search for a Different Happy Ever After is me exploring how to build a life full of love, family and sex as a single woman. It celebrates the many different ways to live and love and I really hope it makes people who have not gone down traditional paths feel better... but also I've heard from married people that it made them think a lot about how they behave in their relationships. There's a lot of sex in there too, as I try to shed some of my Irish Catholic schoolgirl hangups via tantra retreats - so read if you'd like to enjoy sex more than you do. 

Thank you so much Marianne for taking the time to write this. And for anyone reading, make sure you check out both of Marianne’s amazing books.

More Life Advice

Melissa Hemsley - “Be unapologetically and gloriously you”

Sally Abé - "Trust your instincts, they are there for a reason."

Sarah Ockwell-Smith - "Be less bothered by what other people think of you."

Donna Lancaster - "All roads lead to Love, if you let them."

Monique Roffey - "Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life"

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

Until next time,

BB x

Hello dear Uplift subscribers.

This week, the one and only Melissa Hemsley has generously shared her time and advice for a life advice edition of The Uplift. She has a wonderful new cookbook out: Real Healthy, which focuses on cutting back on ultra-processed foods with practical, healthy and easy recipes. Melissa’s Feel Good which came out in 2022 made a massive impact on my love for cooking so I can’t wait to get stuck into this one too!

I hope you enjoy this newsletter. I’ll level with you: I am running on empty at the moment and trying to take steps to feel more balanced, so keeping the newsletter running with life advice editions for now.

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

Be unapologetically and gloriously you!

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

I can’t pick instantly. I think of multiple times in my life where I would love to offer myself advice. I’m always a bit jealous of people who say that they have no regrets but focusing on regrets is something that I am focusing on not doing so much. In general though, when I look back at moments of my life I do feel a sense of compassion and want to give myself a hug and say you did the best you could at the time with what you knew. P.S. If you believe in signs, a song just came on, that I’ve never heard before, just after I wrote that, with the lyrics “I give my best and I am proud of me” - spooky!

What's your best life advice for other people?

If in doubt walk it out. I have always loved walking both by myself with my dog and now baby and I also love walking in a group. (Shout out to the Mental Health Mates community of which I’m an ambassador. It’s a volunteer-led organisation. You can go on the website, type your postcode and see where your local free walk is.) I’ve never regretted a walk. 

What inspired your latest book and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

My cookbook Real Healthy -  Unprocess your diet with easy everyday recipes is inspired by the quite scary statistics that in the UK we eat more than we eat more ultra-processed foods than any other country. On average about 2/3 of our diet is made up of ultra-processed foods and the reason this is concerning is because eating ultra-processed foods has been linked to serious health outcomes - physical and mental  - and some of our under 14 year olds eat an almost 80% heavy UPF diet, which is affecting their learning, their social skills and their health. 

There is so much to say about why ultra-processed foods are so prevalent and how unfair and inequal the food system is in the UK. Everyone deserves nourishing real food. I thought about how I could make a difference in my work as a food writer and Chef and so this cookbook is all about delicious durable recipes for every night of the week, especially the busiest nights of the week when we rely most on the convenience foods that might be full of UPFs as opposed to real food. There’s lots of meal prepping, batch cooking, one pots and 30 minute meals focused around delicious and familiar ingredients and I’ve focused on life friendly methods and family-friendly favourites. The easiest way to eat less ultra-processed food is to eat more veg, more fruit, beans, whole grains, herbs, and spices so my recipes celebrate those.

Anything else?

I know that there’s many obstacles to home cooking - the cost of living crisis, shopping bills, oven bills, time pressure, lots of us working longer and later more than ever time, all the pressures of modern day living, as well as confidence in the kitchen and the fact that many of us haven’t been taught to cookery schools. I hope my recipes are a helping hand in your life to help make getting food on the table a bit easier.  Small steps really build up as we know. One tip I’ve got is a little weekly challenge; if every time you do a weekly shop, you aim to buy one less ultra-processed food and aim to buy one more whole food (eg a fresh fruit or veg, or a tin of chickpeas or beans for the cupboard or a bag of berries or spinach for the freezer ), then in a month you’ve eaten four less ultra-processed foods AND four more whole foods than you’d usually have. In a year, you’ve eaten about 50 less ultra processed foods and 50 more wholefoods. 

Thanks so much for this Melissa. My eating has certainly got a bit sporadic with a transient summer so I am looking forward to being more intentional as we move into September and love the idea of the wholefoods challenge.

More Life Advice

Sally Abé - "Trust your instincts, they are there for a reason."

Sarah Ockwell-Smith - "Be less bothered by what other people think of you."

Donna Lancaster - "All roads lead to Love, if you let them."

Monique Roffey - "Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life"

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

Wishing you (and me) peace and balance and if you enjoy this newsletter and would like to/are able to buy me a coffee, you can do so here.

If your name was in the above list, what would your quote of encouraging words be? Please do share in the comments below.

BB x

Hi there,

I’m sticking to Life Advice editions of The Uplift at the moment as I navigate the disappointment of buying a flat falling through and illness leading me to cancel going to two festivals! I had a full day of rest on Wednesday and am taking things step by step. Once I am back to full health, the good news editions of The Uplift will continue.

This week, I’m excited to bring you advice from the excellent Sally Abé, who starred in BBC 1’s The Great British Menu. She’s now written a memoir called A Woman's Place is in the Kitchen, which reveals the reality of working in restaurant kitchens - and how they need to change for the better.

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

I got told when I was a teenager to always trust your instincts, they are there for a reason. If something feels off from the get go, it generally is.

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

I'd go back to when I first became a head chef and I was running on fumes. I would tell myself to prioritise time to switch off. Down time is never given enough credit but is incredibly important. 

What's your best life advice for other people?

You are only the centre of your own universe. Everyone else is the centre of theirs, so try not to dwell on things and interactions with others, they have probably already forgotten the thing you said or did that you lie awake at night thinking about.

What inspired your latest book and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

I was inspired to tell my story in order to let others know they are not alone in what they are going through, but also as a manifesto for change. You don't have to be a foodie or know anything about kitchen life to read it!

Thank you so much for your time Sally! Wise words indeed.

Worth sharing

I make friendship vows, which include please don’t expect me to reply to voice notes | The i

Divine Timing In Disguise | SoulWisdom

Finding Happiness | Wisdom Waves

Keeping Our Relationships Fresh | Nedra Nuggets

Stunning Space Station Video Shows Glimmering Northern Lights from Above | Scientific American

A Grandmother's Confession | A Pilgrimage for the Soul - walking back to meet ourselves

Connection Jam: September (1st Anniversary)

More Life Advice

Sarah Ockwell-Smith - "Be less bothered by what other people think of you."

Donna Lancaster - "All roads lead to Love, if you let them."

Monique Roffey - "Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life"

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

Wishing you a nourishing weekend. If you enjoyed this newsletter and you are able to, feel free to buy my a coffee here. Thanks.

BB x

Photo credit: Rob Hill

Hi there,

I can’t believe it’s August. I have intended to write to you many times but I’ll be honest, I’m struggling with routine and motivation at the moment for various reasons. Any top tips, please send them my way. This next life advice edition of The Uplift features author and parenting expert Sarah Ockwell-Smith, whose latest book How To Raise A Teen has recently been released in paperback.

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

To trust my instincts. It was when I was a new mother and I was hung up on doing things the right way, which at the time was following Gina Ford routines. My baby was not a fan of the routines and consequently we were both unhappy, stressed and exhausted. My instinct was screaming at me to cuddle him, rock him and feed him whenever he was hungry, but as a new mum I thought that I was wrong and the experts were right. A very wise ex midwife advised me that instincts were never wrong and I've never looked back. We were both instantly so much happier. It's why I've based my whole career around supporting parents to trust their instincts.

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

I would go back to my teenage self and tell her that it's OK for her to have lots of big feelings. That she wasn't a bother to others and that she didn't have to constantly hide how she felt in order to make others happy. I'd tell her it was OK to be angry, frustrated, jealous, scared, bored and all the other feelings I was taught were 'unladylike' and 'unbecoming'. I'd let her know she could scream and cry to her heart's content and that people wouldn't love her any less for it (or if they did, they didn't genuinely love her). That teenager who learned to hide and mask her feelings to appease others grew into a chronic people-pleaser. I was raised to 'be a good girl', or in other words, not cause bother to others, and it's taken me several decades to learn it's OK for me to behave authentically around others, to say no and to assert boundaries. I'm a lot happier for it and wish that I'd broken the 'good girl' spell long ago.

What's your best life advice for other people?

To be less bothered by what other people think of you. This is related to the previous point, but as women I think we can live our lives constantly concerned that others view us in a negative light. We worry that they think we are unsociable if we turn down an invitation or cancel plans, that they think we are unhelpful if we don't immediately offer our services when somebody is in need, or that they think we are unfriendly if we are not all smiles and happiness all the time. We read a lot of judgement into conversations and situations with others that just isn't there and if it is, well then that usually says far more about the other people than you. In my work as an author I'm used to reading nasty comments about me personally, it could be easy to take them to heart, but I remind myself that these people don't actually know me and their words are usually just a reflection of their own feelings and own life experiences. It's very freeing being able to live more authentically.

What inspired your latest book and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

I've always wanted to write a book about raising teenagers, but I wanted to have experienced it fully myself. My own four children are now young adults and I feel I have enough life experience to do the book justice. I've always believed that parenting books should be written by people who have lived experience of what they're writing about, so it felt wrong for me to write it earlier. When you have a baby, or little children, there is so much advice available, so many books, websites and classes, yet when those children reach their tweens and teens you're expected to know what you're doing, only then it gets really hard. There are so many new situations and challenges to face that you are completely unprepared for.

Similarly, as a mother, you're navigating huge life changes like the peri-menopause, or menopause, career changes, maybe relationship changes, maybe caring for elderly parents and this coincides with your teen needing you more and more. Raising little children is physically demanding, but nobody prepared you for the mental load of raising teens. The constant juggling of everybody's emotional needs is tough and there is no support.

Finally, I wanted to write a book that made people love teenagers. Our society is so harsh on them, constantly complaining about "the youth of today", blaming all of their behaviour on hormones (something that isn't true) and coming up with increasingly outdated authoritarian punishments to try to control them. I wanted my book to celebrate teens, to show parents how amazing they are, to understand what is happening in their brains and to rebuild connections. I hope readers leave excited to transform their parenting and their connection with their teens.

Anything else?

The book is part parenting book and part self-help, because raising teens is also partly about re-parenting yourself. What do I mean by that? Well most of us were on the receiving end of a lot of ridicule, shame, punishment and control when we were teenagers. We were often misunderstood and we grew to believe we were the problem - but we weren't. Raising teenagers involves a lot of navel gazing. We have to unpack what we went through, otherwise we subconsciously repeat the parenting we received. If you've ever heard the phrase "I opened my mouth and my mother came out" you'll know what I mean. My book is about asking yourself "did I really deserve that? what would have helped me?" and then being the parent you wish you could have had twenty or thirty years ago for your own teen. It's a great opportunity to break cycles in your family and as well as making life easier as a parent today, it can leave you with a sense of inner peace over your own adolescence too.

Thank you so much Sarah. You can sign up to Sarah’s Substack here.

Worth sharing

The spirit of spontaneity | Soulscapes

Mel B hails 'life-changing' honorary doctorate | BBC News

Home Office U-turn grants Wirral ‘legend’ right to live in UK after 46 years | The Guardian

From rough sleeping to advising Prince William | BBC News

Stop Protecting Your Ego | Unfiltered Real Talk

I dared to leave my three young children and spend a month with strangers – and it was blissful | The Guardian

‘Africa’s most resilient lion’ and his brother filmed making 1.5km swim across dangerous African river | The Guardian

More Life Advice

Donna Lancaster - "All roads lead to Love, if you let them."

Monique Roffey - "Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life"

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

I’d love to hear from you what’s bringing joy to you this week. Please let me know in the comments below. Also, I’ve restarted my Ko-Fi page, so if you enjoy my newsletter and are able to, you are welcome to buy me a coffee here.

Lots of love,

BB X

Hello there,

I hope you’re doing OK. I’m with grief at the moment and I’m also with hope. I’m delighted this week to have a very special edition of The Uplift from the incredible ‘elder-in-training’, life transitions coach, circle holder and writer Donna Lancaster. Donna is a wise elder to me and a mentor and she has been instrumental in facilitating deep healing and awakening in my life and helping me through big life transitions. She has written two books so far: The Bridge: A nine-step plan to healing your trauma, accepting yourself and living life to the full with a name drawn from a retreat she used to run with Gabi Krueger. Then Wise Words For Women is a pocket book of comfort.

To celebrate The Bridge coming out on paperback, Donna has generously answered my questions, which were originally the format of my Life, Oh Life podcast that I experimented with in 2021. Donna was one of my guests then and you can listen back to the episode here. Donna has been on many podcasts including Fearne Cotton’s Happy Place and more recently I enjoyed this chat on Women are the Medicine.

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

“Your tears are the truth, let them speak” - from my first counsellor in my late 20s when I started to unravel. 

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

I would go back to my 20-something self and tell her - “Everything is going to be ok Donna, I promise.” I would also say “Slow down my love… you don’t need to sleep with every man who says you’re beautiful nor marry the first guy who says he loves you. Slow down sweet girl.. oh and did I tell you, everything is going to be ok? (It is).”

What's your best life advice for other people?

I'm not keen on life advice. I think people need to be supported to trust their own wisdom. So that would be my ‘advice’. Learn to trust yourself. It takes time and practice and moments of stillness, but that feeling in your gut and in your hear.. that's the truth. Trust it. 

What inspired The Bridge and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

The Bridge is my first book and has just been released on paperback, published by Penguin Life. I’d say to people who are curious -  read it, dip into it, let yourself absorb what you need right now. Then when you are ready for change, do the work.

Anything else?

There are no mistakes. All roads lead to Love, if you let them. 

Thank you so much Donna! If you’d like to work with Donna she has a Life Transitions workshop coming up in Sussex on Sunday, September 8. She is also offering The Grief Space on Saturday, November 23 and A Higher Love: A one day retreat to fall in love with life again on Sunday, November 17. You can find out more information by clicking through to the Deepening Into Life website, following Donna on Instagram and via her Substack A Pilgrimage for the Soul - walking back to meet ourselves.

Worth sharing

Madagascan lemur ‘honks’ are music to our ears | The Independent

21 habits the happiest people do every morning | The i

Sacred buffalo calf offers hope amid efforts to revive species | BBC News

Learning to Be Comfortable Living in the Gray | Nedra Nuggets

Get Busy Living | Nedra Nuggets

The Art of Listening and how to fall in love with the world | How to survive an existential crisis

More Life Advice

Monique Roffey - "Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life"

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

Righto, I’m going offline for a bit for family time, a wedding, a residential for my course and a hen do, but I have lots more life advice editions lined up to schedule in. See you on the other side.

Big love to you,

BB xx

Good morning,

And what a Friday in July it is to wake up. It may be raining but there is big change happening in the UK following yesterday’s General Election. I am personally thrilled that the Green Party has won four seats, including Sian Berry in Brighton. I’m also proud of my former colleague Paul Waugh for winning a seat as a Labour MP in Rochdale as he transitions from his incredible journalism career. Islington North has also stuck with Jeremy Corbyn who has won as an Independent. Most importantly, my hope is that this shake up will mean positive changes, including policies to help the most vulnerable people in our society and across the world. Not only that but action is needed to protect our beautiful nature, including our waters and oceans and animals.

At Catching Lives, the homeless charity I work for, we’ve been joining Homeless Link’s campaign to End Homelessness. We invited all the Canterbury candidates to the Day Centre and to sign Homeless Link’s Manifesto to End Homelessness. Let’s hope the new Labour Government delivers.

If politics isn’t your thing then scroll down for politics-free good news stories and features.

Things That Have Brought Me Joy Since I Last Wrote

• This General Election campaign highlights thread by Scott Bryan. I do enjoy Ed Davey!

• A Solstice beach fire gathering with friends

  

• Solstice Sunset Ecstatic Dance Brighton on Devil’s Dyke. How beautiful are these photos. There is another one tonight. Come dance with me in the rain.

• Dog and tortoise sitting: Rosie and Toby, Dave and Derrick. An absolute joy.

  

  

  

• My friend Sarah Weiler, of Day of Musical Joy, and pals storming Glasto’s Greenpeace Stage with their 90s Pop Piano Singalong. Epic.

• Also Primary School Bangers at Glastonbury

• A weekend away at Camping By The River in Oxfordshire for a hen do with a lot of singing and sunshine

• Seeing family including my 91-year-old cousin Monica, cousin Catherine and her lovely dog, pictured, my sister and her family, and my Uncle and Aunt in Cambridge, who encouraged me to cycle a 14 mile round trip.

• Catching up with friends and their beautiful babies

• Attending Quaker meetings

Uplifting News Stories

Puzzle Bored Cafe in Brighton becomes CIC | Instagram

Street Pastor embarks on second ‘7 for 70’ challenge | Catching Lives

10 Funny Wild Animals In Photos: A Preview From Comedy Wildlife Photography Awards | Forbes

Volunteers give away 100 free school prom dresses | BBC News

Vicky Spratt's second book goes to Fourth Estate | The Bookseller

‘I landed my dream theatre role by auditioning on TikTok’ | BBC News

Escaped pet donkey found 'living best life' with elk | BBC News

Taylor Swift's praised for giving 'incredible gift' after every UK performance | Daily Record

Worth Sharing

'I'm as happy as I've been in my life,' says aid worker Simon Boas as he faces death | BBC News

I put my microphone in front of a 7 week old baby red squirrel | YouTube

ICYMI: The life advice edition with Monique Roffey | The Uplift

Donna Lancaster’s The Bridge has been released on paperback this week

This looks good: Belonging - 6th Annual Empowerment symposium - Live at Birkbeck College

Stop Sitting In The Waiting Room Of Your Own Life | Refinery 29

July’s Connection Jam is at Platf9rm Hove

A moment that changed me: I dived into the shadows of a shipwreck – and saw the 5ft turtle that altered everything | The Guardian

Build a hedgehog highway! 33 ways to welcome more wildlife into your garden | The Guardian

No, being single doesn’t make me miserable. It’s the key to living my best life | The Guardian

OK that’s it for now. Two Uplifts in one week. Can you tell I’m meant to be writing an essay?

I’d love to hear how you are in the comments below and whether you enjoyed any of the news or features I shared.

Big love,

BB x

Good morning from my latest dog and cat sit in Shoreham,

I hope this email finds you well. This week, I’ve got a special life advice edition from the fabulous Trinidadian-British author Monique Roffey, whose latest novel Passiontide is just out. This evening, Monique will be in conversation with Yvonne Battle-Felton at Foyles Charing Cross Road if you’re able to make it.

Monique is the author of seven novels and a memoir. The Mermaid of Black Conch won the Costa Book of the Year and the Costa Novel Award and was shortlisted for the Rathbones Folio Prize and the Goldsmiths Prize. Her other highly acclaimed books include Archipelago, which won the OCM Bocas Prize for Caribbean Literature, The White Woman on the Green Bicycle and House of Ashes. In addition to her work as an environmental activist, she is a professor of contemporary fiction at Manchester Metropolitan University.

Monique has kindly found time in her packed schedule to answer my life advice questions, the format of which was devised for my 2021 podcast series Life, Oh Life. Here goes.

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

Saying nothing is very powerful.

If you could go back and give yourself some advice to yourself at a certain point in your life, when would you go back to and what would you tell yourself?

Yes, my advice would be to SAY NOTHING. I’ve been attacked in my life once or twice, publicly and in those days I knew little about how social media works and tried to fight back online. I would definitely say to that younger Monique, “say nothing” and “do nothing”. Haters will hate and to leave them alone .

What's your best life advice for other people?

“Follow your bliss”. Mythographer Joseph Campbell said that and he was right. It’s deeply spiritual advice. Find what you really love and make sure you have lots of that in your life and as a result, life will be good. 

What inspired your latest novel and what would you say to anyone thinking of reading it?

A true crime inspired this novel, or probably two crimes, the deaths of Asami Nagakiya in 2016 Trinidad and Sarah Everard in the UK in 2022. This is a novel about a feminist uprising and about the crime of femicide. Both women were ‘only walking home’ and were murdered. 80,000 women are murdered each year, globally; twice the number of the killings in Gaza, and yet this number is unnoticed. Women are killed and no one seems to care or see it as an act of terror.

So I wrote a novel about this. 

Read it if you care.

Thank you for your time and wisdom Monique.

Worth Reading

Passiontide by Monique Roffey review – a passionate protest novel | The Guardian

More Life Advice

Sarah Weiler - “Trust the feeling of aliveness”

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

If you enjoyed reading The Uplift, please press the little heart just below and feel free to share your best life advice in the comments, or forward this email to a friend.

Speak to you soon,

BB x

Hello,

This newsletter will reach you on the longest day of the year, with the Summer Solstice falling on June 20th this time around. As this email arrives, I hope to be watching the sun rise on the beach just after 4.30am with the Moon Rays swimming group. I’ll be paddling as I got a new tattoo on my arm a few days ago and I’m not allowed to get it in the sea water until it’s healed. In the evening, I plan to sit around a fire with friends on the beach and who knows, I may dip my toes in the water again, as I long for the time I can be fully immersed in the ocean again.

Wishing you a light-filled day however you are spending the day. Here are 10 facts about the June Solstice shared by a friend in a WhatsApp group in case of interest to you. Also, here is a beautiful photo article from last year shared by another friend: Solstice: Celebrating the return of light – in pictures.

Earlier this week, I returned from a glorious trip visiting my friend Kelley, who does breathwork and plant ceremonies in Ericeira, Portugal. I went away for six days to mark some transitions happening in my life including moving home and finishing a significant year of self development and study. After visiting, I can see why so many people are moving to Portugal and buying land abroad. I was lucky to stay in a peaceful bell tent on Kelley’s land (pictured above). This is what it looked like inside.

Here is me in the compost loo with a view (built solo by the amazing Kelley).

We spent time chatting, laughing swimming, eating and exploring. On one day I swam three times.

We also attended two events. One was Solstice-themed at holistic retreat centre House of The Rising Mojo, which included a ceremony where we set intentions and created a nature Mandela, an ecstatic dance with music from the incredible Pablo Rozas and a set by Joaquin Sabate, who runs the centre. There was also more dancing and a singing circle around a fire. Here is the only photo I took and if you zoom in you can see the silhouettes of people sitting around the blazing fire. The stars and moon were also on top form.

On Sunday, we went into Lisbon and went to a singing circle in the park run by massage therapist Marina. It was there that we learnt parts of the gorgeous song “In Dreams” by Jai-Jagdeesh, which I feel is medicine for my soul. I hope it is for yours too. I love how events like this bring strangers together to connect deeply outside in nature. Thanks for the photos Marina!

Since I came back, I have been listening to the song and recordings of our singing non-stop to help me land from such a special trip. In my searches online, I came across Edie Art who has set the song to some gorgeous artwork on YouTube here.

In the spirit of sharing soul tending songs, I also would like to share Alexi Murdoch - Something Beautiful, We Shall Be Known by MaMuse and You Say by Lauren Daigle (One of my favourite uplifts since you shared it with me before, thank you Judith). If there is a song that speaks to your soul, please share it in the comments below.

Things That Have Brought Me Joy Since I Last Wrote

Watching moody Brighton sunsets on the beach

The moon showing off

Sitting around a fire with friends

Another pet sit in a stunning home with two dogs and two tortoises

Discovering Too Good To Go exists in Portugal

Worth Sharing

World's first fine-dining restaurant staffed by homeless people to open in London | The Big Issue

Ememem Playfully Revitalizes Cracked Pavement With Vibrantly Patterned Tiles | Colossal

Passiontide by Monique Roffey review – a passionate protest novel | The Guardian

The school run by kids | BBC

New York military veteran comes out in obituary: ‘I was gay all my life’ | The Guardian

Indigenous Women Protecting the Great Barrier Reef | Gender Security Project

Donna Lancaster and Frederique Bicker are running a one day retreat to fall in love with life again

How to Become a Boundary Ninja | Deepening Into Life

Booking is live at Stanmer Sauna Garden’s new home

Vote For Animals General Election pledge

Homeless Link’s End Homelessness manifesto

Discount code for Trusted Housesitters

OK I need to go to bed seeing as I am getting up in a few hours.

Are you marking the Summer Solstice? I would love to hear more in the comments below.

BB x

If you enjoyed this free email and would like to buy me a coffee, you can do so here.

Hi there,

It’s Loneliness Awareness Week (10th to 16th June) and I thought I’d dedicate today’s newsletter to just that and sending love to anyone who is feeling lonely right now. The theme for this year’s Loneliness Awareness Week is Random Acts of Connection, which I absolutely love.

The campaign is created and hosted by the Marmalade Trust and this year people are being encouraged to increase simple, everyday moments, which help us feel less lonely. This can be as simple as a chat in a queue, smiling at a neighbour, reaching out to a friend, or signing up to a new activity. They’ve created a list of ideas here. These are the kind of interactions, I’m trying to slow down and savour every day, rather than have my head down looking at my phone. Smiling at strangers (and dogs) and talking to cats (and dogs) usually goes down quite well in Brighton I’ve found.

Over the years, I’ve learnt how connection is so important for my mental wellbeing and to help me find hope and joy during the more challenging times in life. One book that really helped me understand this was Johann Hari’s Lost Connections (Thanks for the recommendation, Emma.) Also, Donna Lancaster, a trainee elder and trusted mentor, talks about the “Six Tent Pegs” to help people “stay tethered in stormy weather”. One of these is about connection and a good balance of time alone; “alone not lonely” and connecting to others. Donna also extends this to our connection to ourselves, the natural world and our higher power. You can read the post on the tent pegs for free on her Substack here. (Would recommend subscribing if it resonates!)

One of the standout times of loneliness in my life, like many other, is during the first lockdown of 2020. As someone single and living alone, suddenly not going to work or being able to have contact with others, felt unbearable. 2020 was also the year that I started working with Donna Lancaster and also trying other alternatives to just talking therapy. In my loneliness, I had a moment where suddenly I looked at the leaves dancing on the trees and realised in nature, I would never be alone. These moments in nature have expanded to the treasure of birdsong, feeling held by the earth or leaning on a tree, watching the sea or getting in for a dip and also when sunlight filters through a tree.

On loneliness - The Uplift (From 2021)

It was also when going through a career transition and moving home last year that I had moments of loneliness and again it was spending time in nature that kept me going. Now I am in Brighton, I feel I am part of a community thanks to human interaction too. It is so friendly here.

I’m currently on a dog and cat sit in Brighton and I am reminded how much joy animals bring. Walking a cute dog also means more conversations with strangers.

Things That Have Brought Me Joy Since I Last Wrote

Lots of sea swims, alone and with friends too

This plate of food made for me with so much love by my friend Leasa

The June sunshine

Visiting Kent and seeing my mum and going to watch Everybody’s Talking About Jamie for about the sixth or seventh time

Finding rocks like this on the beach

An incredible, releasing Yoga Massage in Kent with Sarah Grattan

An evening of musical joy with Sarah Weiler

My friend Aurora landing her first art exhibition

Moving out of my previous house

Taking my 91 year old cousin Monica to Old Leigh for the day

Being introduced to the music of MaMuse (thanks Teenie, Sarah and Mags)

My lovely friends announcing their pregnancy

Camping at Vallis Veg in Frome for a friend’s 40th and seeing all the babies and toddlers of our friendship group

Winning at rainy, slug-abundant camping by wearing a Dry Robe

A delicious picnic in Stanmer Park…

…where there is a pick and mix for dog treats ^^^

I’m enjoying reading this book ^

Summer flowers

I watched the poppy blowing in the breeze and thought how it is both delicate and resilient

A full moon in May

Righto, that’s it from me this week. I’d love to hear in the comments what helps you combat loneliness, or feel connected in whatever way works for you. I’d also love to hear stories of Random Acts of Connection if you’d like to share.

• I’m also avoiding reading the news so don’t have as much of a catalogue of good news stories so please do share any below if you’d like to.

Have a lovely week,

BB X

Hello, It’s been a while!

It feels great to be writing to you and I also feel overflowing with ideas of what to say. I last wrote to you in February and since then so much has happened. I have been very focused on my course in London and also busy with life in Brighton. A couple of months ago, my housemates and I were served a Section 21, which means our tenancy is ending in early June. Also, my course is coming to an end so I’ve been thinking about my next chapter and hoping to continue my training.

Rather than look for a new home immediately, I’ve decided to do more house sits and spending time in Brighton and Kent over the summer as well as hopefully volunteering at festivals with PsyCare or the Insecurity Guards, both which I have recently trained with. PsyCare is an incredible, grassroots charity that provides welfare and harm reduction at festivals. Earlier this month, my friend and I attended the training at The Fold in Worcestershire where we met lovely people, received solid and rich training, were immersed in nature and even saw the Aurora Borealis.

My home life has been challenging, including the WiFi being extremely unreliable, so I decided a few weeks ago that I needed to find ways to get out the house and routine in yet another transition period. Things that have been extremely helpful include joining a coworking space - Platf9rm in Brighton and walking my neighbour’s beautiful dogs. I walked up to my neighbour a couple of months ago and said on first meeting “Would you like me to walk your dogs?” Days later and I had a twice weekly slot taking these absolute babes on a 90-minute walk.

They are the most well-behaved dogs I have ever looked after and they have brought immeasurable joy to my life. Speaking of dogs, the coworking space is also dog-friendly, which makes me feel extremely happy.

Something else that has helped me stay on track has been life coaching with the brilliant Donna Burgess. Donna has held space for me to spill everything present for me and then break it down to manageable in a really constructive, insightful and encouraging way. She’s helped me tap into my own wisdom around commitment and discipline including keeping on top of my sleep routine, room tidying and taking care of myself. Her kindness and care have helped me remember my own self-compassion and self-care. I thoroughly recommend her. Visit Donna’s website for more info.

I’ve also continued my Personal Training with my now-friend Marios Iacovou and I’ve also started doing yoga with a new friend Naze, of You’re Grounded. I was even lucky enough to have a 121 session in Naze’s garden last week and have decided to book into a series of 121 sessions to hone my downward dog and warriors!

More Things That Have Brought Me Joy

• Oh wow, May is QUITE the month for things to happen in Brighton. There’s the Brighton Fringe, the Brighton Festival, the Spiegeltent and Artist’s Open Houses to name a few things. I think I might have to do another post of pictures I want to share from these things, otherwise these newsletter will be never-ending. Biggest joyful highlights include Brook Tate’s musical Birthmarked, which is coming to Manchester and London imminently and I can’t recommend it enough. I also loved United Queendom: Smooch at the Brighton Spiegeltent, with a review going up soon on We Love Brighton. Medicine Woman was also super provocative and funny and I adored Paul and Laura don’t give a sh*t (Sorry) and I’ve loved visiting local artist houses on the Seven Dials trail.

• Last weekend, the incredibly talented and humble Becs Pearson invited me to her Storytelling Beyond Words showcase at Emerson College in Forest Row. I was blown away by her immaculate performance and ability to move me to both tears and laughter through her deep vulnerability and sharply crafted words. I also had the privilege of being in the audience as five other storytellers shared their work.

  

• I was also invited as a guest to my first ever Huddlecraft showcase by my friend Dan and the theme was Entangled Places at the end of April. The event showcased some fantastic ideas, was a chance to meet some really interesting people and helped me feel connected and remember my love of trees, when I have been so focused on the sea.

• Something else that brings me SO MUCH JOY is my friend Sarah, of viral Dry Robe video fame’s Day of Musical Joy, which is a day of singing at her home for friends of friends. DOMJ is also something Sarah runs at festivals and events and more information can be found out via her Power of Uke website.

Uplifting News Stories

Letting grass grow long boosts butterfly numbers, UK study proves | The Guardian

Insects and Other Animals Have Consciousness, Experts Declare | Quanta

London Marathon: Runner with Down's syndrome gets youngest record | BBC News

Worth Sharing

The Six Tent Pegs | Donna Lancaster via Substack

Five ways to bring more awe into your life | Positive News

Street Pastor to take on seven challenges to celebrate turning 70 | Catching Lives

Teacher is running 1,000 kms for Catching Lives | JustGiving

Orphaned ducklings are rescued from motorway | BBC News

Dear diary: why are we so obsessed with recording our private thoughts? | Plaster

Recommended

• Dan Simpson of Connection Jam is running An Introduction to Authentic Relating on Sunday 2 June. Details here.

• Donna Lancaster is running two more ‘Soul Biscuits’ online sessions; Embodying Love on 26 May and and Soul Focused Living 2 June. More info here. Her book The Bridge is also now out in paperback.

OK, I think that’s it for now. I’d love to hear from you in the comments something that’s recently brought you joy and any uplifting news stories you want to share.

BB X

Hi there,

Here’s a bonus edition of The Uplift to *BRIGHTON* your Tuesday! If you’re a close friend of mine, you’ve probably already forwarded me the Wearing my Dry Robe viral video that’s been making waves in sea swimming communities across Britain for the past 10 days. The spoof of Wiley’s Wearing My Rolex was made by a lovely friend Sarah Weiler aka Weiler and has even caught the eye of comedian and fellow Brighton sea swimmer Jen Brister.

Sarah, a musical comedian, coach, DJ and ‘quitting queen’ moved to Brighton in 2023 and like so many of us bought a Dry Robe. Sarah, a serial joy-sparker, then decided to write a tongue-in-cheek song about her new garms and film a music video on Brighton beach with lovely pals and fellow sea swimmers. She never expected the video would go viral, clocking up more than 100,000 views on Instagram within a week.

You can watch the fantastic video above with all the credits to the brilliant people who made it happen.

She kindly spoke to me for a life advice edition of The Uplift, which uses a question framework I first used in my 2021 podcast Life, Oh Life. Sarah also has a podcast called Knowing When To Quit and a Substack newsletter called Carousel.

What inspired you to make the video?

My drying robe! (actually from Passenger, not Dry Robe). From the moment I bought it I fell totally in love with how warm and cosy I felt, how practical it was in the rain, and how gorgeous the colours were. I decided it needed its own song, and the idea of re-writing Wiley's Wearing My Rolex as Wearing my Dry Robe came to me as I was on the way to meet one of my team to run a Power of Uke workshop. We spent most of our set up time brainstorming lyrics and cliches about cold water swimming. 'Could this be a music video?' was a question we asked ourselves pretty early doors. The answer was yes. It all came together remarkably quickly. I think the deadline of it having to happen in Winter helped spur me on, or I may have procrastinated further.

What has the response been like?

Incredible! I thought the song would make people laugh, but I hadn't anticipated that it would also really cheer people up during the longest January since records began. I've had so many people message to say that it took them out of a slump and brought them some joy - and that feels like the biggest success. I've also been spotted in the street in Brighton and one woman asked for a selfie! 

What’s the best advice anyone’s ever given you?

'Do you actually like living like this?' This was a question my friend asked me back in 2016, when she saw I didn't have a free evening or weekend for three months. I was a chronic over-booker and I had never even paused to think whether I wanted to do it all. It kick-started a total life overhaul and a slower, kinder way of showing up for myself. I now am much more intentional about what I include in my life, and am a big champion of quitting things that no longer feel alive.

What advice would you give yourself if you could go back?

Move your body.

I spent so many of my younger years feeling anxious and stressed, and I know that it was partly because I was not doing enough exercise. Running, hiking and swimming are all things that are now my lifeline and I wish I'd found them sooner.

What's your best advice for other people?

“Trust the feeling of aliveness”, and “follow the joy”. If something feels off, trust that. If something feels great, trust that. I don't think you can go wrong if you follow those nudges. It will certainly take you to some interesting places. 

More Life Advice

Rosie Wilby - "When things feel tough, reach out to other people"

Samantha Baines - "Just go for it"

Selina Barker - “There’s a real power in owning what you want”

Corinne Peacock - "Stop trying to live someone else’s life or by someone else’s rules."

Bernadette Russell - “Be kind, Be curious, Find the joy.”

Giles Paley - Phillips - "Reach out, listen, encourage and be kind."

Thanks so much for chatting to me Sarah! Hope you enjoyed the video, Uplifters!

If you enjoyed reading The Uplift, please press the little heart just below and feel free to share your best life advice in the comments, or forward this email to a friend.

Until next time,

BB x