There is a version of healing no one talks about enough: the part where you kind of… stop thinking about healing.

You stop waking up and immediately scanning your body for what feels off. Life’s little inconveniences become exactly that—little. Your baseline softens. You’re curious again. Playful again. You make plans because they sound fun, not because you’ve calculated whether you’ll have the energy for them.

You start flirting with life again. And THAT, to me, is the real win.

Getting there can be brutal. Sometimes regulating your nervous system is a 30-second breathing exercise. Sometimes it’s working through shit you very intentionally buried in the basement of your brain and hoped would never come upstairs again. It’s daily reps. It’s unlearning. It’s realizing that some of the ways you learned to protect yourself are now the very things keeping you stuck.

But the outcome??? Holy shit.

To feel at home in your body again. To trust yourself again. To have enough space in your brain to wonder and create and be spontaneous and care about things that have absolutely nothing to do with “healing.”

I would do the work a thousand times over !!

The funny thing is, I didn’t understand any of this when I first started healing. I thought getting better meant finding the right thing to do to my body—not changing the state my body was living in.

So I spent a lot of years trying to heal my body by adding things. Supplements. Protocols. Perfect morning routines. More testing. More information. More things to swallow at breakfast.

And listen- I am still very much a supplement girl. You will have to pry my magnesium out of my cold dead hands.

But somewhere along the way, I realized there was another piece of the puzzle I had been massively underestimating:

My body was stressed as hell.

Not necessarily I have a big presentation tomorrow stressed. I mean the subtle kind. Your shoulders are always slightly raised. You’re constantly rushing, even when there’s nowhere to be. You can’t sit on the couch without checking your phone. You’re exhausted but somehow still wired. You’re puffy and inflamed despite working out and eating well.

And then there are the things you don’t immediately recognize as stress: you’re laughing a little less. Pleasure feels a little duller. Your curiosity starts to disappear. The zest you used to have for life has slowly, almost imperceptibly, faded into the background.

You’re functioning. You’re doing all the things. You just don’t feel quite as alive doing them.

And the weirdest part is that after you live this way for long enough, it stops feeling like stress. It just feels like you. A slightly shittier version of you, but your new norm.

That was the part I had to unlearn.

Because regulation isn’t about becoming someone who never gets stressed. That’s impossible, and frankly, sounds incredibly boring. It’s about teaching your body how to experience stress and then come back.

Stress, safety. Activation, recovery. Out and then back in. Again and again and again.

I’ve shared a million of my favorite little nervous-system tricks on the internet- the physiological sighs, the humming, the shaking, the things you can do in approximately 90 seconds while hiding in the bathroom at a dinner party. Or while driving to work. I coined them the lazy girl ways to regulating your nervous system. Because they are exactly that: almost comically easy little ways to help your body downshift.

I love them. I use them every single day.

But they’re only one piece.

Because if your baseline is chronically activated, we need to do more than talk your nervous system off the ledge every Tuesday afternoon. We need to change the baseline. And THAT is the work that changed everything for me.

It meant the tiny daily reps, yes. But it also meant looking at what I was consuming all day long. How I was eating, sleeping, and moving. Learning my triggers. Relearning how to be bored. Relearning how to rest. Getting curious about why certain things could send my body from 0 to 100. And eventually, working through some shit I have very intentionally buried and would have preferred to leave there.

So below is the full protocol I wish I had years ago: the 30-second tools, the daily practices, the weekly resets, the deeper trauma and pattern work, and the exact framework I use now when I can feel myself slipping out of my baseline.

Some of it takes 30 seconds. Some take an hour. Some of it takes months. But all of it is working toward the same thing:

Getting so good at coming back to yourself that eventually, you stop thinking about “healing” all the time and start living again.

Because real regulation looks so much more than being “calm.”

It looks like curiosity, playfulness, energy, pleasure, creativity. A body that can digest and sleep more easily. More room for spontaneity. More capacity for joy! More desire- for people, for experiences, for whatever is coming next.

Basically, you get your appetite for life back. And that is the whole point.

Welcome to The Lazy Girl Nervous System Protocol.

First: what does “nervous system regulation” actually mean?

Because this phrase has officially entered the wellness-content hall of fame alongside cortisol, inflammation, and gut health—words we all use constantly and occasionally forget to define.

Your autonomic nervous system runs an enormous amount of your body in the background: heart rate, blood pressure, digestion, breathing, temperature regulation, and your response to stress.

The two branches you’ll hear about constantly are:

Sympathetic: fight or flight. Mobilization. Your body preparing to do something.

Parasympathetic: rest and digest. Slowing down, recovering, digesting, restoring.

And importantly: sympathetic activation is not bad. You WANT your nervous system to activate when life requires it.

The goal is flexibility: can your body sound the alarm when it needs to—and then turn it back off when the threat has passed?

That second part was where I struggled for years. I still get stressed. I still get overstimulated. I still have days where my brain has 46 tabs open. The difference is that now I notice it sooner, the tiny things stay tiny, and I know how to get myself back to baseline much faster.

That, to me, is regulation.

The sneaky signs your body might be asking for a little help

For a long time, I thought stress looked like feeling stressed. Heart pounding. Racing thoughts. Panic. Anxiety. Sometimes it does. But chronic stress can be much subtler.

For me and so many others, it can look like:

• tired but unable to relax

• scrolling even though you don’t actually want to be scrolling

• weirdly irritated by tiny things

• needing constant stimulation

• difficulty concentrating

• feeling disconnected or “not quite in your body”

• always getting sick

• digestive symptoms getting louder during stressful periods

• feeling guilty when you’re doing absolutely nothing

And then there’s the other side of dysregulation that gets talked about much less: shutdown.

Sometimes overwhelm doesn’t make you feel frantic. It makes you feel flat. It makes you freeze.

Unmotivated. Disconnected. Foggy. Checked out. Like you know there are things you should care about, but you can’t quite access the part of yourself that cares.

Our stress responses are more nuanced than “fight or flight.” People also use terms like freeze and fawn to describe ways we respond to threat or overwhelm.

The important thing isn’t diagnosing which little nervous-system box you’re currently in. It’s getting curious about your patterns.

What does your body do when it has had enough? That question is much more useful than asking whether you’re “regulated.”

And yes, this can show up physically

This was the piece that made nervous-system work finally click for me: your stress response isn’t happening separately from the rest of your body.

When your brain perceives a threat, your body mobilizes resources to deal with it. Heart rate and breathing can change. Stress hormones rise. Energy availability shifts. Digestive and motility changes.

Your body is essentially saying, hey, we have something more important to deal with right now. Which is great when the threat is an actual threat. Less great when the “threat” is your inbox.

Repeat that activation over months or years, and chronic stress can influence far more than your mood—including sleep, digestion, pain, immune and inflammatory signaling, metabolism, and reproductive function.

BUT, and this is important, I don’t believe every physical symptom is secretly unresolved stress.

I had very real physical root causes that needed very real treatment. What I eventually realized was that I could work on both.

Treat the body. Support the nervous system. Investigate the root cause.

These aren’t competing philosophies. For me, they became parts of the same project.

Basically: everything I wish someone had handed me years ago. <3

Read more

After college, I relished the much-needed break from my Industrial and Labor Relations and business classes. And now, 8 years later (?? literally how), I am yearning for a set curriculum that excites me. I am craving to use my brain in a capacity I haven’t used it in for years. I miss my old attention span. I miss, dare I say, being interested in my own thoughts?

Subscribe now

Somewhere along the way, adulthood became an endless stream of content instead of big-picture ideas. This isn’t surprising. This is science. This is called being addicted to your phone.

Open TikTok. Watch twenty videos. Close it. Open it again ten minutes later because your brain is hungry for stimulation. We’ve become incredibly good at consuming tiny fragments of everything and spending very little time with anything.

I was spending time with my 15-year-old cousin, and she mentioned how she doesn't “do” movies. Long-form content is OUT amongst Gen Z. Thank god she is an avid reader, although, unfortunately for the reading industry, statistics show Gen Z is, in fact, not a fan of reading.

Reading has become “too slow.” Going to the movies feels almost vintage. TikTok can summarize the movie for you in less than a few minutes!

I know we think our endless scrolling is fun and games, but it has consequences. Constant stimulation makes sustained focus harder. Research has linked frequent task-switching and heavy use of short-form media with reduced sustained attention and shallower information processing. And don’t even get me started on the negative mental effects. So really im just here to tell you: PEOPLE ARE GETTING BORING AND SAD, AND IT SHOWS.

Reading books, watching full-length films, and engaging with long-form writing ask of us the opposite: patience, reflection, memory, imagination. This is the type of person I want to be, and the type of people I want to surround myself with. Yes, sure, let's chat about all things reality TV, but really, I want to talk ideas, concepts, opinions, big-picture existential thoughts, emotions, REALNESS. You can do both.

I notice it every time I take a break from TikTok. The less time I spend scrolling, the calmer my brain feels. But not even just that- the more my real brain comes back to me. The more I can hear my own creativity, thoughts, and opinions forming rather than everyone else’s.

The more time I read books, the more I want to read books. The more time I spend on Substack or Matter, the more curious I become.

So this month, instead of letting the algorithm decide what enters my brain, I built myself a curriculum—it’s really all the best parts of school without the deadlines and grades. And, quite frankly, it made me extremely excited not only to start my month, but also to have fun “projects” to look forward to at the end of every workday.

I’m over letting the algorithm dictate what I consume, and thus literally how I think and act. I am exhausted of short-form content; I WANT TO USE MY BRAIN AGAIN. And mainly because I need to counteract the 30 hours of Love Island I just consumed. Ya know. Balance.

Ok, enjoy my July Curriculum, and please steal ideas and share ideas for next month (aka in two days).

Required Reading:

Fiction:

• We Hexxed the Moon- Technically a cozy fantasy about curses and magic, but I think it's really a story about grief, identity, and the growing pains of finding yourself as the people around you evolve. It explores how friendships shift over time, how much of our identity is shaped by those closest to us, and what it means to become your own person. I gave it a 3/5—it was a fun, quick read, but I found myself wishing there was more character development and emotional depth. That said, that's often the tradeoff with a shorter novel, and I still enjoyed the underlying themes.

• A Visit From the Goon Squad- A beautifully written novel (Pulitzer Prize winner, I believe), told through a series of interconnected stories, where each chapter follows a different character whose life unexpectedly overlaps with the others. I loved it; it's a must!

• Almost Life (my current read) follows two women who meet one summer in Paris and traces how a single connection can shape the rest of your life. I’m a sucker for a book that explores identity, connection, the paths we don’t take; just give me deep character development and I'm in. I posted this on TikTok the other day, and I've never had so many comments saying this was their favorite book of the year, so I'm excited to begin!

Nonfiction:

• Outliers by Malcom Gladwell : I listened to this via Audible, rather than read it. Big fan of physically reading one book, and simultaneously listening to a different book. This is a fascinating look at what actually separates exceptional performers from everyone else- and why success is often much more complicated than talent alone. 3/5 for me and open to suggestions on books that will get me motivated career-wise!

Substack Reading: Some favorites of the month! I always restack my favorites, so if it's easier, you can just go to my home page and scroll through.

• I Wrote Down My Dream Life. Six Months Later I was Living It.

• Train Your Attention Span So Good It Feels Weird to Scroll.

• Discipline Comes From Having No Choice

• How to Become Someone Who Actually Does Things

Matter Reading List: If you’re trying to spend less time doomscrolling without giving up your phone entirely, download Matter. It curates some of the best long-form journalism and essays from publications all over the internet into one clean app, making it incredibly easy to swap mindless scrolling for something you’ll actually learn from. It’s genuinely one of my favorite apps for “productive scrolling” and has completely changed the way I consume content.

Here are a few of my favorite reads from this month:

• The Attention-Span Class Divide

• Has AI Already Killed How-To Nonfiction?

• How GPT- 5.6 Changes Knowledge Work

• How Did American Christianity End Up Like This?

Movie Club:

• Pride and Prejudice- I don't know how, but somehow I missed a lot of the classics growing up... so we're going back and fixing that. Pride and Prejudice is first up, and I'm so excited to finally experience it for myself.

• The Odyssey- DUH you must go see it. Preferably in IMAX because I regret not doing that.

• The Invite- My FAVORITE movie of the year. You’re telling me I can watch relationships evolve, dissolve, and challenge basic relationship norms over the course of a dinner party? Sign me up. I honestly want to go see it again. I was giggling!!

  

Lab Assignment:

• To Be Magnetic Course: Not to sound too woo-woo (although honestly, this course isn’t even that), but every single time I go through To Be Magnetic, I somehow end up getting the things I’ve been working toward. It’s a manifestation program, but it’s rooted much more in psychology and neuroscience than in “just think positive, and it’ll happen.” The course is really about identifying subconscious beliefs that keep you playing small, rewiring those patterns through guided exercises, and helping your brain start acting from a place that actually aligns with the life you want. Whether it’s coincidence or not... every time I commit to the work, opportunities seem to show up, I become more confident taking action, and somehow the things I want start falling into place. It’s one of those resources I find myself coming back to again and again! Soo, im restarting this week and I'll keep you updated on the progress.

Electives:

• Continue learning chess! This is the board I have.

• Writing letters! I have recently found myself collecting cards everywhere I go. I am addicted to buying cute birthday cards, anniversary, wedding, thank you, just because cards, you name it. So now I’m putting them to good use and sending letters just because.

Art Assignment:

• A watercolor day with friends. Create something! I just bought this watercolor book and these watercolor paints, in hopes it helps me continue with this hobby! Feel like it's the perfect mindless, yet creative hobby that will simultaneously act as a regulator of the nervous system.

The more old-fashioned, the more I like it right now! My way of boycotting AI and the new age of short-form content (while simultaneously loving AI and short-form content?) It’s a love-hate relationship, and I am still figuring out how to navigate it.

But regardless, I forever want to be someone who still reads entire books- fiction and nonfiction. Who spends Saturday afternoons wandering museums. Who has enough attention left to think her own thoughts before the algorithm hands her someone else’s. AND who can talk about Love Island!! A girl who can do both!

Every month, I'll be putting together a new curriculum- books, essays, documentaries, films, articles, podcasts, ideas, and little assignments that make life feel richer. And make me feel smarter!

I promise you being curious is how you keep life fun. Just because school is over doesn’t mean you need to stop being a student!!

xx,

When was the last time you talked to your body? I’m not talking about the constant stream of thoughts running through your head, but genuinely sat in silence, put a hand on your heart, and checked in with your body.

We’re constantly consuming- podcasts while we walk, music while we drive, Netflix while we eat. And social media during every spare second in between.

And when we need clarity, we ask everyone except ourselves. Chat GPT, our friends, Tik Tok. Anyone but the person who actually has to live our lives.

The older I get, the more I believe intuition isn’t some magical gift that only a few people possess. It’s a relationship. One that requires trust, attention, practice and time.

Subscribe now

Over the years, my body and I have become best friends. Most of my healing didn’t come from learning how to push through symptoms. It came from learning how to listen to body before the symptoms became (even more) all-consuming.

This practice has taught me when I need rest, or movement. When I need connection or alone time. When I need to get something off my chest, when I need to scream or cry. When i’m not abiding by my boundaries, and so much more.

I’ve learned that my body is constantly offering feedback. The hard part is slowing down enough to notice it.

For years, my body was trying to tell me things. It was telling me I was exhausted. I needed rest. Certain habits weren’t serving me. Certain people weren’t serving me.

But, I was too distracted to listen. I had become so disconnected from myself that I couldn’t hear it.

And eventually, when we ignore what our bodies are trying to communicate, they find other ways to get our attention. For me that looked like chronic inflammation, severe fatigue, depression, numbness, body pain.

I genuinely think many of us have lost touch with the subtle signals our bodies are constantly sending us.

Not because they are gone. But, because we ignore them. We’d rather watch Netflix, than listen to what our body, mind and soul have to say.

We’ve become so accustomed to noise that we’ve forgotten how to listen to the one person we should be most connected to.

Which is why one of the most underrated wellness practices has nothing to do with supplements.

It’s sitting with yourself. Listening to your thoughts when there is no distraction. Just you and your body.

One of my favorite ways to do this is laying flat on my bed. Something about having my entire body supported by the mattress feels grounding. One hand on my heart. One hand on my stomach. Then I close my eyes and ask:

What are you trying to tell me?

What do you need from me?

At first you may hear nothing. That’s okay. You’ve spent years listening to everyone else. It takes time to rebuild trust with yourself.

In fact, most people spend years disconnecting from their bodies because it feels easier than feeling everything so deeply.

So when you finally try to reconnect, it is normal for it to take time. But eventually, you’ll notice something.

Sometimes the message is obvious. Slow down. Move your body. Get outside. Go to sleep. Have the conversation you’ve been avoiding. Stop treating your body like an afterthought.

Other times, it’s more subtle.

A tightness in your chest signalizing anxiety. What for? I don’t know, you have to dig a little.

A knot in your stomach? Maybe there’s a conversation you’ve been avoiding? Ask follow up questions.

The more you practice this, the more you’ll begin to recognize your body’s language.

The answers weren’t missing. That space to hear them was. And maybe that’s what intuition really is. Not some mystical knowing. Just creating enough quiet to hear yourself again.

xx,

Now, if you’ve spent any amount of time in the wellness world, you’ve probably heard cortisol blamed for just about everything.

Moon face? Cortisol.

Poor sleep? Cortisol?

Anxiety? Cortisol

Can’t lose the last five pounds? Definitely cortisol.

Subscribe now

The reality is that cortisol has become one of the most talked about hormones in wellness- and one of the most misunderstood.

Because despite what social media may have you believe, cortisol is not the villain. In fact, cortisol is one of the reasons you’re alive.

And understanding that shifted the way I approach my health completely.

For years, I thought the goal was to lower cortisol. What I eventually learned was that the goal wasn’t to suppress my body’s stress response- it was to create a life that gave my body fewer reasons to activate it in the first place, and to teach my body how to turn the stress response off once the threat has passed.

Because a healthy body isn’t one that never experiences stress. It’s one that knows how to recover from it.

What Is Cortisol?

Cortisol is often referred to as our primary stress hormone, but that’s only part of the story.

Produced by the adrenal glands, cortisol plays a role in regulating blood sugar, inflammation, blood pressure, immune function, metabolism, energy production and even our sleep-wake cycles.

In other words, cortisol isn’t simply the hormone that appears when you’re stressed. It’s one of the body’s master regulators, constantly helping you adapt to the demands of daily life.

Every morning, your body naturally releases a surge of cortisol to help you wake up and feel alert. This is known as the Cortisol Awakening Response, and it’s actually a sign that your body is doing exactly what it’s supposed to do.

In a healthy stress-response system, cortisol follows a predictable rhythm throughout the day. Think of it like a bell. Cortisol is naturally highest in the morning, helping you wake up, feel energized, regulate your blood sugar and prepare for the demands of the day ahead. While cortisol helps you wake up, melatonin helps you wind down. The two work together in a carefully choreographed dance, creating the natural rhythm that governs our energy, focus and sleep.

When this rhythm is functioning properly, you wake up feeling refreshed, have steady energy throughout the day, and naturally become sleepy at night.

The problem is that modern life is constantly interfering with this rhythm.

Many of us wake up and immediately reach for our phones, exposing ourselves to stress, notifications, emails and artificial light before we’ve even gotten out of bed. Before we’ve seen sunlight, moved our bodies, or eaten breakfast, we’re already disrupting the natural rise and fall of cortisol that was designed to guide our energy throughout the day.

We spend our days under chronic stress, eating on the go, skipping meals, over caffeinating, and pushing through exhaustion. Then at night, we sit under bright lights, scroll social media, answer emails and watch television until the moment our heads hit the pillow.

In many ways, we’re sending out bodies mixed signals all day long- suppressing our natural wake-up cues in the morning while simultaneously suppressing our natural sleep cues at night.

As a result, many of us find ourselves exhausted when the alarm goes off, dependent on caffeine through the day, and suddenly wide awake the moment our heads hit the pillow.

And when that rhythm becomes disrupted long enough, the symptoms often start to show up everywhere. From our energy and sleep, to our digestion, hormones, mood and overall health.

This is why I always tell people: Cortisol isn’t inherently bad, it’s protective. It’s your body’s way of saying, “"I’ve got this. Let me help.”

The goal is not to eliminate cortisol. The goal is to have the right amount at the right time. Because while short-term elevations in cortisol are normal and healthy, problems arise when the body perceives that it is under threat around the clock.

For many women, it begins with feeling constantly “on”. You may feel productive, driven, and capable of pushing through almost anything. But beneath the surface, the body is spending more and more time in a state of alertness.

Over time, that can look like anxiety, poor sleep, blood sugar swings, digestive issues, PMS, acne, inflammation, and the feeling that you can never quite relax.

Eventually, many women find themselves shifting from feeling wired to feeling tired. The problem is that by the time most women realize something is wrong, they’ve often been borrowing energy for years.

The adrenaline that once kept them going no longer works the way it used to. Instead of feeling energized, they feel exhausted, burned out, and disconnected from their bodies.

I always say, and will say again: our bodies struggle to distinguish between a fight with your partner, an ongoing gut issue, financial stress, a brutal workout when you’re already depleted, or a tiger chasing you through the woods.

To your stress-response system, stress is stress.

And sometimes the biggest stressors aren’t the ones happening today. Many of us are carrying unresolved stress from years- or even decades ago.

Experiences we’ve intellectually moved on from, but that our bodies may still be responding to. “The body keeps the score” is a very real thing.

How Dysregulated Cortisol Can Show Up in the Body:

The tricky part is that cortisol dysregulation rarely announces itself as a cortisol problem. More often, it shows up disguised as symptoms elsewhere in the body.

In your brain:

• Anxiety

• Racing thoughts

• Brain fog

• Feeling overwhelmed

In your energy:

• Afternoon crashes

• Dependence on caffeine

• Feeling tired but wired

• Burnout

In your Hormones:

• Irregular cycles

• PMS

• Acne

• Fertility challenges

In your Metabolism:

• Cravings

• Blood sugar instability

• Increased hunger

• Weight gain around the midsection

In your Gut:

• Bloating

• IBS symptoms

• Constipation

• Food sensitivities

In your Sleep:

• Trouble falling asleep

• Waking during the night

• Not feeling rested despite sleeping

In reality, dysregulated cortisol can look like fatigue, stubborn health symptoms, digestive issues, hormonal imbalances, feeling disconnected from your body and so much more.

The Cortisol Mistakes I see Women Make Over and Over Again

• Drinking coffee before eating a protein rich breakfast

• Running on caffeine instead of sleep

• Not getting sunlight within the first hour of waking

• Starting the day with emails, texts and notifications before checking in with yourself

• Under-eating protein and overall calories

• Doing HIIT when your body is begging for recovery

• Constantly consuming (Tik Tok, podcasts, Netflix, music) instead of processing

• Ignoring past trauma

• Ignoring blood sugar swings

• Never checking in with their own bodies

• Looking for a supplement before addressing lifestyle stressors

• Staying overstimulated from the moment they wake up until they go to bed

• Too much artificial light at night

• Viewing rest as something that must be earned

• Trying to silence symptoms instead of asking what they’re trying to communicate

I’ve made nearly every one of these mistakes myself. Many of them are in fact celebrated by modern wellness culture. We’re praised for being productive, pushing through exhaustion, drinking more coffee and squeezing in another workout, and getting by on less sleep.

But the body keeps score. And eventually, it will stop simply asking for our attention, but force it. I can tell you from experience.

How I Support Healthy Cortisol Today

• Morning sunlight: This helps anchor your circadian rhythm and reinforces the natural cortisol awakening response. In simple terms, it helps your body understand when it’s time to be awake and when it’s time to wind down later that night.

• Protein-rich breakfast within an hour of waking: This helps stabilize blood sugar, which in turn reduces the need for the body to rely on stress hormones to keep energy levels up.

• Walking after meals: A wildly underrated hack for stress management. It helps regulate blood sugar, supports nervous system function and lowers the intensity of the stress response without adding additional stress to the body.

• Strength training: Exercise is a stressor- but the goal is finding the right dose. Learning to incorporate more strength training and fewer “go hard every day” workouts dramatically improved my recovery, energy and overall resilience.

• Prioritizing sleep: Sleep is where much of the body’s repair and recovery takes place. No supplement has ever moved the needle for me as much as consistently protecting my sleep.

• Three full meals a day (high protein, blood sugar balancing)! Chronic under-eating signals to the body that resources are scarce. One of cortisol’s jobs is to help you survive perceived famine, which is why constantly under fueling keeps the body in a state of stress.

• Nervous system work: Breathwork, therapy, EMDR, journaling, spending time with loved ones, getting outside, laughing more- all of these signal safety to the body. Utilizing these tools daily will teach your body how to move out of a state of fight or flight into parasympathetic much quicker.

• Limiting artificial light at night: Blue light suppresses melatonin production and signals to the body that it’s still daytime, making it harder for cortisol and melatonin to follow their natural rhythm.

• Less urgency: Perhaps the most important shift I’ve made is no longer treating everyday like an emergency. Slow down. Stop rushing. Breathe.

• Checking in with my body daily (no, literally I am out here talking to my body asking what she needs).

The biggest shift wasn’t learning how to “lower my cortisol”. It was learning how to create a life that gave my body fewer reasons to stay in survival mode.

HI our bodies were built for seasons of stress, not lives defined by it!

xx,

The clothes I’m wearing (or eyeing), what I’m reading, listening to, purchasing, and consuming… instead of doomscrolling.

It’s been far too long since I last wrote on Substack, and if I’m being honest, i’ve let myself hide behind the excuse of “being busy”.

Subscribe now

In reality, I’ve poured nearly all of my energy into my home.

I moved into a three-bedroom, one office space with almost zero furniture- so naturally, my entire personality became interior design. Every waking thought has been curtains, linens, wood tones, and questioning- how do I warm up this space?

But we’re finally getting to a place where it feels comfortable, so im forcing myself to re-enter real life. To think about things beyond my next Facebook Marketplace find, fabric swatches, and side tables.

And while my brain has been mostly filled with home decor, these are the things I’ve been wearing, loving, and consuming lately—

What I’ve been wearing

“Comfy but cute” has been the uniform of the month- something I can move in, live in, and still feel like myself in.

My most worn activewear set right now is surprisingly from a brand I hadn’t heard of before. I now own two sets and rotate them constantly. Also, for someone who only lives in black- this was a nice detour. There is something about the fabric and the cut of the bra- it’s comfortable, but also one of the most flattering fits I’ve found.

Dog walk attire has been on repeat: boatneck tees and perfectly slouchy boyfriend sweatpants.

Another “comfy but cute” staple: this boatneck sweater i’ve worn at least 30 times in the past few months. It’s one of those pieces you reach for without thinking, and it always works. Promise it’s worth the wear per cost.

Beauty products I’ve been obsessing over

I have always been incredibly sensitive to scent, so finding perfumes I can actually wear feels rare. However, the two scents I cannot stop reaching for- DedCool and Summer Fridays- both feel light, clean, and wearable for daily use without the toxic chemicals!

The Osea Dream Lip Mask has been a nightly ritual. It’s one of those products that feels immediately luxurious, but also genuinely works.

Clean Skin Club towels- one of those swaps that just makes sense for an acne-prone girl, and once you start, you won’t go back.

If you are looking for an alternative to retinol, but still want similar effects, then Alphret will be your best friend. Truly, my entire friend group uses this product, and we talk about how it’s transformed our skin on a weekly basis.

Home favorites of the month

Roadway deserves a permanent spot in this newsletter. I genuinely don’t think I would have survived this move without them. This is my second move using their team, and I already know it won’t be my last. When I say my entire home was packed up in four hours and delivered safely to my new home! Thewellpursuit10 gives you 10% off local moves, and 5% off long-distance moves!

This side table is my current obsession- it’s simple, but adds so much character to the room in a way I didn’t expect.

My bed situation has, quite literally, transformed both my boyfriend’s and my sleep.

It’s one of those things where—yes, it’s an investment. And yes, I would make that investment over and over again to feel well-rested, clear-headed, and the best version of myself every single day.

The mattress itself is Avocado, medium-firm—supportive in that subtle, grounding way that you don’t fully appreciate until you’ve experienced it. For bedding, I rotate between Parachute’s linen in Bone and Coyuchi’s percale in Stone.

And then there’s the Eight Sleep.

I almost don’t want to say it… but it’s worth every penny. It’s one of those upgrades that changes everything—your sleep, your energy, the way you move through your days. And once you have it, there’s really no going back. Genuinely, I dream about getting into my warm bed every night, which then continues to cool while I sleep, to ensure my body is perfectly regulated.

I stumbled into a small shop in Echo Park- Bucatini- and immediately fell in love. They carry so many of my favorite brands (Match, Sabre, Maison Pierson).

And then more recently, Lone Fox just opened! They also have an online presence, but you must go in person if you live in LA! This is my most recent haul.

These ottomans were an unexpectedly good Target find.

And a major shoutout to Strangers Interior Design. They’ve been helping me curate my space, and when I say they’ve been incredible- I mean it. If you need someone to help you build your new dream home, or simply want to chat with them for 90 minutes on how to best layout your space, advice, sourcing etc. they’re worth it.

What i’m doing instead of doomscrolling

I just picked up a new custom journal, and I’m already completely in love with it. There’s something about having a notebook that feels so personal that makes you actually want to sit down and use it. However, if you’ve been in a journaling rut, I always recommend a guided journal to get you back into the flow of things. The Form Practice journal is my go-to when I’ve been in a journaling rut.

I’m also still deeply committed to my favorite meditation app- Open (this link lets you try it for a month free). It’s one of the few habits that consistently shifts my entire state, and no other app quite compares to this one for me. It’s simple, grounding, and keeps me coming back (going on my fifth year now).

And reading- slowly but surely making its way back into my routine. I am either flying through book after book or in the midst of a three-month reading hiatus. I’m just about to finish Martyr, which took me a bit to get into, but ended up being a really thoughtful, worthwhile read. Next up is Strangers, because it feels like the entire world has been recommending it to me lately.

Anyways~ I promise I am back now. I’ve missed this space! The slowness of it, the intention behind it, the feeling of sitting down to actually think and share what’s been shaping me.

There’s something about writing that brings me back to myself and feels like a whimsical hobby rather than a chore. So, I'm publicly committing to showing up weekly again! See you next week!

xx,

The deeper I’ve gotten into understanding physiology, hormones, and energy regulation, the more one theme keeps resurfacing: blood sugar stability. I honestly think it may be one of the most foundational- and overlooked- pillars of women’s health.

Because when blood sugar is constantly spiking and crashing, it doesn’t just affect hunger. It ripples through everything. Energy, mood, cravings, anxiety, brain fog, PMS intensity (my ability to peacefully coexist with my boyfriend), skin inflammation, and how stable your hormones feel across the month. For many women moving through life exhausted, wired, irritable, or feeling like a different person before or during their period, this isn’t a niche metric. It is a meaningful root contributor.

The empowering part is that this isn’t complicated biohacking reserved for experts. It’s a physiological lever that’s surprisingly straightforward to understand once someone actually teaches it- and that’s the gap. We’re rarely shown how central blood sugar regulation is to feeling stable, clear, and resilient. So, this week, I want to break it down simply: the science behind why it matters, how it influences your body, and practical ways to support it without turning your life upside down.

Blood sugar isn’t just about sugar. It’s about how your entire system functions. At its simplest, blood sugar refers to the amount of glucose circulating in your bloodstream. Glucose is your body’s primary fuel source- your brain relies on it, your muscles use it, and your cells depend on it to function efficiently.

When you eat, carbohydrates are broken down into glucose and released into the bloodstream. Your body responds by releasing insulin, a hormone that helps shuttle that glucose into cells where it can be used for energy or stored for later.

This system is beautifully designed- but modern eating patterns, chronic stress, poor sleep, and lifestyle habits disrupt its rhythm. Instead of a steady rise and gradual return to baseline, many people experience sharp spikes followed by steep crashes. That instability is where symptoms begin to show up.

And repeated spikes don’t just affect how you feel in the moment- over time, they increase physiological strain. Frequent blood sugar spikes make your body work harder- raising insulin, increasing inflammation, and stressing your cells. When this pattern becomes chronic, it influences everything: hormonal balance, pcos, anxiety/mood, brain stability !! metabolic flexibility and tissue health, long-term inflammatory conditions, and so much more.

This isn’t about fear- it’s about awareness. Simply monitoring your glucose and developing blood sugar balancing habits can drastically change your health.

Why stability matters more than we think

Blood sugar isn’t as isolated metric- it’s deeply connected to almost every system in the body:

Energy and focus: rapid fluctuations can lead to the familiar afternoon crash, brain fog, or difficulty concentrating. The brain is highly sensitive to changes in glucose availability.

Mood and anxiety: blood sugar instability can influence neurotransmitter signaling and stress hormone responses. Really, this is just a fancy way of saying- blood sugar affects your personality. It contributes to anxiety, irritability, restlessness, and emotional volatility. One minute you’re social and grounded, the next you’re overstimulated, or convinced everyone hates you- yup, this could be a glucose crash.

Cravings & hunger regulation: spikes followed by drops often driven by stronger hunger signals and cravings, particularly for quick carbohydrates- reinforcing the cycle.

Hormonal balance: insulin interacts closely with both reproductive and stress hormones. When glucose spikes are frequent, and insulin sensitivity stays elevated, it can influence hormones, ovulation, and inflammation tied to cycle symptoms. This connection is especially clear in PCOS, where insulin resistance plays a central role. And while blood sugar dysregulation doesn’t cause conditions like PMDD, unstable glucose can absolutely turn the volume up on symptoms by throwing your brain and nervous system out of balance.

Skin and inflammation: large fluctuations impact skin clarity and overall tissue health.

Long-term resilience: stable glucose regulation supports metabolic flexibility and reduces strain on regulatory systems over time- a foundational piece of preventative health.

Signs your blood sugar might be fluctuating

While only testing provides objective data, many people notice patterns such as:

• Energy crashes after meals

• Feeling shaky or irritable when hungry

• Frequent snacking to stay functional

• Intense carb or sugar cravings

• Brain fog

• Afternoon fatigue

• Difficulty falling or staying asleep

Practical ways to support blood sugar stability

This is where the conversation becomes more empowering. Supporting regulation requires some thoughtful structure.

Prioritize protein early in the day: protein slows glucose absorption and supports satiety and hormone signaling.

Paid carbohydrates strategically: combining carbs with fat, fiber, or protein moderates glucose response.

Move after meals: even light walking improves glucose uptake by muscle tissue.

Eat consistently: long stretches without food followed by large meals can exaggerate swings.

Sleep and stress regulation: cortisol and circadian rhythm disruptions directly influence glucose control

Start your meals with fiber: Eat your veggies first! Fiber forms a physical matrix in the gut that slows glucose absorption, leading to smaller spikes.

Avoid sugary foods alone (especially on an empty stomach): Instead, pair them, or eat them after a balanced meal.

Vinegar before meals: One tablespoon of vinegar in water can do wonders before higher-carb meals. Acetic acid improves insulin sensitivity.

Cool your starches: cool, cook, and reheat foods like rice, potatoes, oats. This increases resistant starch while leading to a smaller glucose response.

Protect circadian rhythm: glucose tolerance declines later in the evening. Late eating leads to larger spikes, and sleep disruption leads to worsened insulin sensitivity.

Nervous system regulation before eating: sympathetic dominance affects digestion and metabolic signaling. So slow down, breathe, and chew slowly. This will help improve nutrient processing.

Build muscle mass! Muscle is the primary glucose storage tissue! More muscle means better glucose disposal capacity. One of the best things you can do for your blood sugar stability.

Build mineral density: minerals influence insulin signaling, adrenal health, and cellular energy regulation. Take your minerals!

Blood sugar stability isn’t a niche wellness tactic- it’s a pillar of metabolic health. And what’s important to remember is that long-term illness rarely begins all at once. It often starts slowly: persistent fatigue, headaches, brain fog, irritability, energy crashes. These signals can feel small or easy to normalize, but they are information. Over time, repeated glucose spikes increase strain on insulin signaling, amplify inflammation, and contribute to the physiological pathways that underlie chronic disease.

The empowering reality is that this trajectory isn’t fixed. Blood sugar regulation is highly responsive to lifestyle inputs: how we structure meals, how we move, how we sleep, and how we support stress resilience. Small, consistent shifts can meaningfully influence long-term wellness. I’m telling you: implement just a few of these tools and watch how drastically they impact your day-to-day health. Because the most transformative changes rarely come from extreme interventions. They come from supporting foundation systems your body relies on every single day- and blood sugar stability is absolutely one of them.

xx,

Most people think discipline is something you either have or you don’t- like some people are simply more consistent, more productive, more naturally motivated. I used to believe that too, that discipline was willpower and wanting something badly enough. But neuroscience offers a much softer explanation: Discipline isn’t a personality trait. It’s neuroplasticity- your brain learning a new default through repetition.

Subscribe now

Neuroplasticity is the brain’s ability to rewire itself throughout your entire life. The more you activate a certain pathway- a habit, a thought loop, a stress reponse- the stronger and faster that circuit becomes. Over time, your brain starts running those patterns on autopilot, not necessarily because they're accurate, but because they’re efficient. Your brain isn’t asking, is this true? It’s asking: Is this familiar? Is this efficient? Is this what we do most?

And honestly, the reason this matters is simple: change isn’t about willpower- it’s about what you repeatedly practice. Your brain learns what you return to. And I feel confident that you can return, again and again, to what matters most.

This is the part that shifted everything for me: your brain doesn’t change through wanting. It doesn’t update through desire or vision boards or even intense motivation. It changes through practice. Wanting a new life isn’t the same as rehearsing one.

Adult change is possible- but it’s more selective. The brain needs a reason to update. Adult rewiring requires specific conditions:

• Focused attention (your brain has to mark something as important). Your brain is constantly filtering what matters and what doesn’t- and it only rewires deeply when something is flagged as significant. This is why half-trying doesn’t work. If you’re trying to build a meditation habit while also checking your phone, your brain doesn’t register it as meaningful enough to encode. Focused attention is the brain saying: ok we’re locked in, we’re learning. Discipline starts with presence.

• Effort and mistakes (plasticity happens at the edge of your ability). Your brain changes fastest when something is slightly difficult- not impossible. Effort and even small mistakes are actually a signal to the brain that adaption is required. If something feels uncomfortable, that is often the rewiring zone. Ease wont create change. The edge does. So next time you’re uncomfortable, recognize it’s not for lack of ability, it’s simply unfamiliar territory.

• Reinforcement (small rewards lock the pathway in). The brain learns through reinforcement. When you do something and it feels rewarding, even in a small way, your brain tags that behavior as: worth repeating. If every time you workout, even if it’s five minutes, you dismiss it as “not enough”, your brain associates the habit with stress. But if you end with “I showed up,” you create a reward signal. The brain rewires through evidence and reinforcement, not punishment.

• Rest and sleep (this is when the brain consolidates the change). The rewiring doesn’t fully happen during the work. It happens after. During deep rest and sleep, your brain consolidates what you practiced- it literally strengthens the new connections and saves the learning. So discipline is also: sleeping enough, pausing, and giving your nervous system space to absorb change.

For me, the clearest example of neuroplasticity wasn’t even a habit. It was a belief. For a long time, my nervous system was wired for fear. I moved through the world expecting for something bad to happen- always slightly on edge, always stuck in fight-or flight. And it didn’t matter how much I wanted to feel calm. My brain had learned a pattern.

I ended up doing EMDR therapy, which stands for Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing- a trauma therapy designed to help the brain reprocess stuck memories and the emotional responses attached to them. Through bilateral stimulation (guided eye movements), EMDR helps your brain essentially update old pathways so they stop firing as if the past is still happening.

And what surprised me most was that healing wasn’t intellectual. It wasn’t just “realizing” I was safe. It was my body learning safety through repetition and reprocessing. The old pathway didn’t disappear overnight- it just stopped being my default. That’s neuroplasticity. Not motivation, not mindset. Actual rewiring.

A belief is not a fact. A belief is a neural pathway. “I’m not good enough” is often just a thought you’ve rehearsed for years until it feels true. And neuroplasticity means: circuits can change. You don’t delete an old belief. You outgrow it by building something stronger. The brain updates most through what neuroscientists call “prediction error”- when reality contradicts expectation.

Old belief: i’m not capable. New action: You show up anyway. Outcome: You survive- better yet, you improve. This mismatch is what forces rewiring. The brain goes: wait, maybe that thought isn’t accurate.

Neuroplasticity isn’t magic- it’s biological. So, here are some tools that make rewiring easier. Start with one. Consistency beats complexity.

• Sleep (your brain consolidates new pathways at night).

• Movement (exercise increases brain growth factors).

• Nervous system regulation (safety makes change possible). Here is my lazy girl way to regulate your nervous system post.

• Journaling and scripting (new narratives become new circuits). I talk more about my journaling habits that transformed my thoughts here.

• Visualization (mental reps count).

• Therapy (EMDR, CBT, somatic work are literal rewiring tools).

• Small rewards with repetition (consistency stamps it in).

You dont need a new personality, you need new practice. Discipline is not intensity. Discipline is rehearsal. And every tiny time you show up, you are teaching your brain: this is who I am now.

Discipline used to feel so harsh to me- like forcing yourself into a life you couldn’t quite reach. But the science is more comforting: discipline isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something your brain can build, slowly, through repetition and rewiring. That is neuroplasticity. That is how people actually change.

If you want to start today: choose one habit- one pathway to build. Remove distractions, make it slightly challenging, reward yourself for showing up, and then rest. Repeat until the brain stops negotiating. Until the new becomes your default. That is how you build a new brain. That is how you become her.

xx,

What i’ve been wearing:

While I love dressing up, I might just love a chic, comfortable look even more- something that feels easy but still put-together. It’s far more practical for my day-to-day. Lately, my go-to has been workout sets styled to feel ready to wear: a cute sweater, ballet flats and Parker Thatch tote. Variations of this have been on repeat:

If I can’t be bothered to wear leggings- which lately, I really can’t- I gravitate toward pants that still feel cute and chic, or sporty. More often than not, i’m reaching for Skims boyfriend pant for a true sweatpants vibe, Enza Costa when I want something a little more elevated, or The Free People Ryder pant for a sporty feel.

I’ll usually pair these with my favorite basic tee, an easy sweater, a casual zip up, or wrap cardigan. For shoes, either a ballet flat or Solomons does the trick for LA weather right now.

Jackets haven’t really been necessary, but i’m still loving my Rue Sophie trench and Frankie Shop tench from last year, for days like this. That said, sweaters have been my most worn this week (and most of winter so far).

What i’ve been reading:

Physically, i’m reading Martyr! by Kaveh Akbar and I’m about half way through- really loving it! It’s poetic, introspective and deeply human, exploring grief, faith, addiction and what it means to search for meaning in modern life. The kind of book that makes you slow down and think about your own life a little, while still being deeply interesting (and fiction!)

Before this, I read- The Raise by Ali Kriegsman, which was a quick, fun read- perfect for in between more literary novels. A kind of psychological thriller about a 29-year-old co-founder suddenly thrust into the CEO spotlight after her best friend and business partner dies under mysterious circumstances.

And if anyone is looking for a perfect winter book: The Secret History by Donna Tart. I read it last year and still think about it. Dark academia at its finest- obsession, intellect, secrecy and a slow, unraveling that feels especially fitting in colder months.

What i’m listening to:

While I go through phases with music (and always have a running monthly playlist of new music inspiring me), lately I’ve been fully in my podcast and audible era- honestly the best way to learn and stay entertained while on the go.

I’m currently listening to Project Hail Mary on Audible, and it genuinely feels like i’m watching a movie. If you’re new to audiobooks, this is such a fun place to start- immersive, fast-paced, and hard to pause. This is on whenever i’m cooking, showering, (yeah I use my octobuddy to stick it to my shower wall), and winding down. It’s also being turned into a movie with Ryan Gosling soon!

Before that, I listened to Atmosphere, narrated by Julia Whelan. A personal rule of thumb (and adopted by many in the Audible universe): if Julia is narrating, I already know i’m going to love it.

Podcast-wise, these were my listens this last week- and I can genuinely recommend every single one, which isn’t always the case:

Hot Smart Rich with Maggie Sellers: This podcast as a whole is one of my favorites, especially as a woman entrepreneur. It consistently keeps me motivated, inspired and learning. While Maggie’s interview episodes are always great, I especially love the episodes she does with her sister, where they break down consumer trends and what’s actually happening in business and culture. Their most recent chit-chat episode- Gossiping about Alix Earl’e Empire and 5 AI Trends You Need To Know About Now- was a standout.

The Wellness Process: Another favorite and one of the only wellness-focused podcasts I listen to regularly. Elizabeth Endres is incredibly genuine and grounded while still being inspiring and educational. Similarly, i’m especially drawn to her solo episodes- her latest solo episode walked through the chatGPT blueprint she uses to organize her life and routines, and yes, I followed it almost verbatim and spent hours happily optimizing my own life.

Habits I’m loving:

I recently re-introduced tongue scraping and quite frankly, I cant believe I ever stopped. It’s one of those small habits that makes an immediate difference- better oral hygiene, fresher breath, improved digestion (by supporting gut-mouth connection). It takes about ten seconds, but it’s one of those non-negotiable morning habits that makes everything feel cleaner.

Another daily staple: Beekeeper’s Naturals Immune Spray. I use it every single day- sometimes up to four times a day- and if you know me, it’s my not so secret weapon for never getting sick. I tell everyone in my life to purchase it. Propolis is incredibly antimicrobial and immune supportive, and I swear by it. I could write an entire Substack on propolis alone, but i’ll keep it short here and just say: it’s good enough to earn a permanent place in my routine.

This lymphatic massage tool has been my favorite five minutes of my shower recently.

Lastly, my morning ritual. I keep this simple but consistent: wake up with no phone, lemon red light while meditating, and a high protein breakfast. This sets my nervous system up before the day starts asking things of me and it’s quite literally transformed my life. If you want the full step by step and the science behind why this works, read my post on The Biology of a Better Morning.

This weeks affirmations:

Affirmations aren’t about “positive thinking” or pretending everything is perfect. They work because of neuroplasticity- your brain’s ability to change based on repeated thoughts and experiences. Your brain is constantly forming pathways based on what you tell it is important or true. When a thought is repeated often enough, it becomes familiar. And familiar thoughts start to feel believable- even if they didn’t at first. Affirmations interrupt old, fear based or self critical patterns and replace them with more supportive ones. And overtime, this transforms how you act, what you believe and who you are.

This weeks affirmations that I repeatedly said:

• It’s okay to rest! Rest is serving me!

• I trust myself to make aligned decisions, even when the path isn’t clear yet.

• I am allowed to go slowly and still move forward.

• I am safe. My nervous system is safe.

• Life is fun, when you make it fun!

That’s all for this week.

xx,

There’s an epidemic happening among women in their twenties and thirties- and it’s not being talk about enough!

So many of the symptoms women casually complain about today feel disconnected on the surface: persistent acne, unexplained bloating, chronic fatigue, stubborn inflammation, irregular cycles, PMS, painful cramps, anxiety that becomes debilitating in the dreaded luteal phase. But when you zoom out, there’s a common thread running through nearly all of them: hormonal imbalance.

Hormones are the body’s communication system. They influence how we feel, how we sleep, how we digest food, how we recover from stress, and how resilient we feel in our own bodies. When they’re out of balance, it doesn’t show up as one clear problem- it shows up as a slow erosion of wellbeing.

Subscribe now

And unfortunately, when women finally bring this list of symptoms to a doctor, it often doesn’t land the way it should. We’re told our labs are normal. That we need to sleep more- and while yes, sleep does matter, the irony is that many of us are exhausted all day and wired at night, unable to access the rest we’re being prescribed. It can feel dismissive, even gaslighting to be told everything looks “fine” when your body clearly doesn’t feel that way.

What’s often missed is that hormonal imbalance doesn’t always show up as a single red flag on a lab report. It shows up as patterns. As symptoms that dont seem severe enough in isolation, but together paint a very clear picture of a system under strain.

What makes this more complicated is that much of what we’ve been taught about health wasn’t build with women in mind. For decades, medical and wellness research relied almost exclusively on male bodies. Female hormones were considered “too complex”, cycles were inconvenient to study, and the assumption was that what worked for men, would for for women, too. HA. We now know that’s not true.

We respond different to stress, fasting, exercise intensity, temperature, sleep deprivation, even caffeine. Certain lifestyle habits that are praised as “healthy” can completely disrupt a woman’s hormones when done without consideration for her biology. And yet, so many women are still trying to heal their bodies using frameworks that were never designed for them.

I know this personally. After years of dealing with my own debilitating symptoms, I realized in order to heal, I needed to understand the female body, chronic illness, and how to live in alignment with my hormones instead of fighting them.

That curiosity turned into years of learning, unlearning, experimeniting and listening. And what I found wasn’t a list of hacks or miracle fixes. It was a set of foundational truths about how women’s hormones actually work- and what they need to feel safe, stable and supported.

These are the things I believe every woman should know about her hormones:

• Your cycle is a vital sign- ignoring it doesn’t make you empowered, it makes you disconnected.

• You have four phases to your cycle: menstrual, follicular, ovulation and luteal, and your hormones shift in each one, which is why you don’t feel the same week to week.

• Menstrual phase: estrogen and progesterone are at their lowest as your body sheds the uterine lining. Energy tends to be lower, the nervous system is more sensitive, and rest and reflection are often needed.

• Follicular phase: estrogen begins to rise as the body prepares for ovulation. Energy, motivation focus and creativity often increase. Many women feel more optimistic, clear-headed, and open to starting new things during this phase.

• Ovulatory phase: estrogen peaks and triggers ovulation. Communication, confidence and sociability often feel highest here. This phase is short but biologically geared toward connection.

• Luteal phase: progesterone rises after ovulation. This hormone has a calming effect, but also increases the need for rest, nourishment, and boundaries. If stress is high or blood sugar is unstable, symptoms like irritability, anxiety, or PMS are more likely to appear.

• A typical cycle length runs from 21-35 days; consistently outside that range is information worth paying attention to.

• Your body needs more nourishment in the second half of your cycle, not restriction.

• A dependence on caffeine will catch up to you.

• Skipping breakfast isn’t helping you lose weight, in fact it just raises your cortisol.

• Under-eating is simply that- starving your body of nutrients that allow your body to thrive.

• Working out harder isn’t the answer.

• Ovulation is a key marker of hormonal health- and simply having a period does not mean ovulation occurred.

• You get pregnant during a small fertile window each cycle- about 5-6 days total, which includes the 5 days before ovulation and the day of ovulation.

• Chronic stress will override any supplement you’re taking.

• Inflammation is a hormonal disruptor long before it’s a disease.

• Feeling wired at night and dead in the morning isn’t normal- it’s cortisol misfiring.

• Your body cannot heal in fight or flight, no matter how “healthy” your routine looks.

• Hormones don’t respond to punishment- they respond to safety and consistency: breakfast within an hour of waking, avoiding caffeine on an empty stomach, eating nourishing, blood sugar balanced meals 3x a day, regular movement, hydration, breathwork, connection, sunshine, nature and sleep.

• Balanced blood sugar and a regulated nervous system are two of the most underrated hormone therapies.

• Cortisol (your stress hormone) spikes don’t just come from stress- they come from skipping meals, too much caffeine, under-eating, HIIT, unaddressed emotional trauma and more.

• High cortisol tells your body it’s not safe to ovulate, build muscle, or burn fat efficiently.

• The same workout, meal, or routine will not serve you equally all month. Our hormones are shifting in each phase of our cycle.

  

• Sleep is essential for hormonal regulation- many hormones are released, converted, or balanced while you sleep.

• Intense hormonal issues like PMS, bloating, acne, mood swings, are common, but not normal.

• Your liver plays a major role in hormone balance. It helps process, package and eliminate excess hormones so they don’t keep recirculating in the body.

• You don’t need a “cleanse”- but you do need proper liver, gut and bile flow support for hormones to exit the body efficiently.

• Many forms of hormonal birth control work by suppressing ovulation. While it can be useful, it’s important to understand that it changes nutrient needs and how hormonal symptoms show up.

• Hormones are responsive- to food, stress, sleep and safety- not random.

So much of what’s normalized for women- skipping meals, surviving on caffeine, “girl dinner”, over-exercising- is framed as discipline, or simply being a girl, when it’s often just disconnection. The best thing i’ve every done for my health was unlearning that. Slowing down: 20 minutes of pilates from my mat in my living room over intense workout classes, eating a high protein breakfast within in an hour of waking instead of grabbing a bar, committing to three full blood sugar balanced meals a day over snacking, checking in with my body instead of running on auto pilot. This changed everything. My inflammation fell away, my hormones stabilized, my energy returned, and my body stopped fighting me. And that’s when I started to look and feel my best. Reminder: your body doesn’t thrive under pressure- it thrives when it feels safe.

xx,

I miss the joy I had as a kid- the uncontainable imagination, the belly laughs that left you breathless, the fearlessness that came from not yet knowing what to be afraid of. I miss running through the dessert playing capture the flag until the sun disappeared, and inventing games with no purpose beyond fun, being weird and loud and unconcerned with how it looked.

lately, i’ve realized I don’t just miss that version of life- I miss that version of myself. so, i’m on journey to find her.

Subscribe now

when we’re young, we move through the world without much self-consciousness. we play, imagine, and express ourselves freely- not because we’re fearless, but because we haven’t yet learned to be guarded.

over time, that changes. we start to notice differences- how others dress, speak, think, and belong. we learn what’s rewarded, what’s ignored, and what draws attention we’re not ready for. slowly, and often without realizing it, we begin to adapt, or more so, we learn to guard.

as life unfolds, we collect experiences that ask us to protect ourselves. some are small, some are painful, and some linger longer than we expect. in response, our bodies do what they’re designed to do: protect us. they learn vigilance. they reach for whatever strategies might help us cope- control, withdrawal, dissociation, anxiety, distraction.

but over time, something subtle happens. the part of us that once moved easily toward play, imagination and spontaneity starts to recede. and now, while it’s not gone- it just no longer feels safe to lead.

so the question isn’t where that version of us went. it’s how we make enough space for her to come back. how we lower the walls just enough to rediscover joy, playfulness, curiosity- and a way of being that isn’t driven entirely by defense.

So how do you actually find her again? while healing is an integral component, I don’t want you to mistake this as a “healing harder” moment, or another self-improvement project. this isn’t about pressure, it’s about safety. learning how to feel safe again in your body, teaching your body to glide out of fight or flight and into parasympathetic, where you can finally tell your nervous system not to be on alert, or controlling, or protective. to be clear, this won’t happen overnight. this part of finding your inner child takes time. it’s about lowering volume on vigilance long enough for curiosity to re-emerge.

I have a whole post on lazy girl ways to regulate your nervous system here- but, if past trauma is keeping you stuck in chronic fight or flight (which is the case for most people), lifestyle tools alone often aren’t enough.

this is where therapy can be extremely helpful- and in many cases, necessary for real healing. Personally, I found EMDR therapy and parts work (internal family systems therapy) extremely helpful. in parts work, you actually communicate with younger, wounded versions of yourself. it’s an unbelievably healing experience and a key contributor to unblocking subconscious beliefs that keep you anchored to old identities and survival patterns.

if you want to learn more, Organic Olivia’s Podcast has a powerful episode worth listening to: the mother wound: identifying nervous system dysregulation and healing the inner child.

while you work on the nervous system piece, these practices and tools can support you in rediscovering your inner child.

think back to what you loved as a kid- when there was no pressure. not a college resume builder. not the sport your parents wanted you to play. what did you gravitate toward when you were choosing only for you? if you were never given that freedom, what did you daydream about instead? ask yourself: can i integrate this into my adult life now? maybe you liked legos? buy legos! or try a puzzle. coloring? “scrapbooking” is what adults call it now- or make a digital vision board (this doesn’t just have to be a January 1st event). playing with play doh? clay? take a pottery class! having hobbies aside from scrolling tik tok and binge-watching netflix is hot!

revisit what made you laugh- not what impressed people. pay attention to what brings up genuine, unfiltered laughter. old movies? silly games? inside jokes? being weird with people you feel safe around? lean into that. re-watch those movies. spend more time with people who make you feel safe. bring board games and cards to dinner parties. make up a secret language with your friend again.

make space for unstructured time. play needs room. play needs boredom. we don’t let ourselves be bored anymore- we distract, we scroll, we schedule. but boredom is often the doorway to curiosity and creativity.

try planning:

• a walk with no headphones and no destination (try a new path, for new stimulation)

• an afternoon with no plans at all

simply ask yourself: what am I craving? this may feel uncomfortable at first- that’s normal. your nervous system is used to constant stimulation. but boredom is often where imagination begins.

Let your body play before your mind believes it’s allowed. children move! all the time! and because of that, they self regulate before their brains are fully developed. they cry, scream, shake, rock- all natural ways to release emotion. coincidentally, these are the very things adults stop doing. Play is somatic before it’s cognitive. Your body remembers what your mind forgets.

try:

• dancing alone to music

• shaking your body to sound

• stretching or moving without tracking it

• siting on the floor instead of a chair

• playing with textures: clay, paint, fabric.

these activities bypass analysis and speak directly to the nervous system. often, joy returns through sensation before it returns through thought- and sensation is how the inner child communicates.

spend time with kids- or animals! I recently went home for christmas and spent time with my niece and cousins. so many childhood memories surfaced just by playing house with four-year-olds. I watched my 30-year-old brother play chase with his five-year-old cousins, and he said (verbatim): “that reminds me of when we were kids. I haven’t had that much fun in a while.” presence is contagious.

go on a solo trip! I went on my first ~real~ solo trip last year to London. While, I’ve traveled alone many times, this was the first place where I didn’t already have a familiar relationship with the city or the people. when you’re alone in a new place, you get to choose everything- when you wake up, where you wander, what you eat, what you linger over. there’s no performance, no accommodating, no explaining. just freedom to choose what lights you up. this freedom often brings parts of you back online that only existed before responsibility took over.

journal prompts (or write a letter to your younger self):

• what activities made time disappear for me as a child?

• when did I feel most free or expressive growing up- and where was I?

• when did I first feel the need to hold back or protect myself? what would I tell her now?

• what small, playful thing could I try this week- just to see how it feels?

this work isn’t about becoming someone new- it’s about unblocking who you’ve always been. your joy, curiosity, and ease aren’t missing; they’re protected. your inner child is not lost- she’s waiting for safety. she returns in moments of play, laughter, and softness, not pressure or perfection. and the more you choose regulation over urgency, presence over distraction, and curiosity over productivity, the more those parts of you learn it’s safe to come back online again.

i’m looking forward to reuniting with mine.

xx,

If you’d like to go a little deeper, I’ve added a paid tier where I share more personal reflections, nervous system practices, and tools I don’t post publicly. No pressure — just an option.

For a long time, I thought change had to be dramatic to be real. Big routines. Big commitments. Big overhauls. My habits lived in extremes - an hour-long walk or no walk at all, a perfect day of eating or who cares, order dessert, the day was already ruined. The in-between didn’t exist for me—black or white, no grey.

But over time- after a lot of unlearning- I realized it was the grey area that changed everything. Slowly, through the smallest things. Habits so subtle they barely registered as work, yet consistent enough to reshape how I felt in my body.

Soft living is what changed me. It became my theme for 2025- not as a rule, but as a practice. And with time, my nervous system softened. My body developed less tolerance for misalignment. I began to seek slowness naturally, after years of practicing it intentionally.

Now my body and brain crave reading with a cup of warm tea over scrolling, Substack essays over television, meditation over disassociating- choosing presence over stimulation, again and again.

These are the free, low-effort micro habits I return to when I want to feel better, without forcing, fixing, or trying harder. These are the habits that taught me the grey is where change becomes consistent- and that soft, steady consistency is what transforms us.

1. Morning sunlight first thing. Early light anchors your circadian rhythm, helping cortisol rise and fall at the right time instead of staying elevated all day. Quite literally determining your cortisol curve for the day- how much energy you have and how well you sleep that night.

2. Grounding or earthing- meaning your bare feet directly on earth’s surface. Sounds woo woo I know, but the science is there. Earthing allows electrons from the ground to neutralize excess positive charge in the body, which may help reduce oxidative stress and inflammation- think better sleep, lower cortisol, better autonomic nervous system balance, and reduced muscle tension.

3. No phone for the first hour of waking (and for the last few hours before bed). Delaying stimulation lets my nervous system wake up gradually instead of entering threat or urgency mode immediately. It also sets the tone for the rest of the day- determining whether I can think in a complex manner vs constantly seeking quick dopamine hits. Set a routine that doesn’t involve your phone: red light, gratitude journaling, meditation, hot water with lemon, reading, movement. Your phone will be there in an hour.

   

4. Start your morning with a hot cup of water, bone broth, or tea. Traditional Chinese Medicine teaches that the stomach functions best with warmth, not cold, because digestion is viewed as a heat-dependent process. Warm liquids support circulation, gut motility, reduce bloating, and provide more stable energy, while cold liquids can create digestive sluggishness over time.

5. Wear socks on your feet. Similarly, the soles of the feet contain kidney meridian points, and exposing them to cold is believed to drain vital energy and weaken circulation. Wearing socks helps preserve warmth, support kidney yang, and protect overall energy, digestion, and hormonal balance.

   

6. A high-protein breakfast within an hour of waking. Eating early tells my body there’s no scarcity, reducing the need for cortisol to surge. This alone has been one of the most life-changing shifts for my mood, blood sugar, and energy- fewer crashes, fewer cravings, and a much steadier day overall.

7. No coffee on an empty stomach. Avoiding caffeine first thing prevents unnecessary stress hormone spikes and supports nervous system steadiness. How you start your day matters, and gentler beginnings create steadier days.

8. Hydration/daily electrolytes. Add a pinch of mineral-rich salt to your water for trace minerals. Essential for cellular hydration, energy, and nervous system function.

9. Three meals a day instead of constant snacking. Predictable meals help regulate blood sugar, which directly stabilizes mood, energy, and stress response. It also allows your migratory motor complex to go through its whole digestion process, meaning less bloating, less brain fog, and more energy.

10. Blood-sugar balanced meals. Protein, fiber, and fat, paired together with each meal, keep glucose stable, reducing anxiety, cravings, and nervous system volatility.

11. Ten-minute walks after meals. Gentle movement improves glucose uptake and shifts the body out of stress mode and into digestion mode.

12. Connection: A biological need, not a luxury. Connection regulates your nervous system, lowers stress, and boosts mood, supporting hormones like oxytocin. It’s one of the most powerful, free tools we have for feeling well.

13. Gentle movement daily. Stretching, walking, and pilates. Gentle, consistent movement keeps my nervous system regulated and my lymphatic system moving (the system that removes toxins).

14. Regular strength training. Your muscular health is directly correlated to the quality of your life. Building muscle supports metabolic health, hormone balance, bone density, energy, brain health, and long-term resilience. It’s one of the most protective things we can do for our bodies as we age.

15. Eating an adequate amount of protein per day. Another way to help your body build muscle. Aim for 1 gram of protein per pound of ideal (or goal) body weight per day.

16. Daily nervous system regulation, multiple times a day. Whether it’s meditation, breathwork, humming, body scanning, or simply slowing down and becoming aware of your body and breath. Intentionally slowing down activates the parasympathetic nervous system and lowers stress hormones in real time (the key to healing)

17. Dinner at least three hours before bed. This gives your body time to digest before sleep, which supports deeper rest and nighttime repair.

18. No blue light after 9 pm (dim your lights after sunset too). Reducing artificial light exposure allows melatonin to rise naturally, signaling safety and sleep readiness to the brain.

19. Journaling. Writing clears mental noise and helps the nervous system process instead of suppress. Suppressed emotions lead to physical and mental symptoms.

    

20. Warming foods/liquids over cold. Warm foods are easier to digest and give energy to the body. They are more supportive of a nervous system already under load. Avoid smoothies, overnight oats, iced lattes, etc. Focus on soups, cooked foods, teas, etc. Warming liquids throughout the day is my favorite way to nourish and calm my body.

21. A night routine: dim the lights after sunset, lower the temp, tea to relax the body, no phone in the bedroom, read pre-bed, consistent sleep/wake times, red light, and meditation to fall asleep via the hatch is my personal routine. These steps all scientifically lower nighttime cortisol, support melatonin production, and improve my sleep quality.

22. Be asleep by 10-11 pm. This is when the body repairs, detoxes, and recalibrates- everything else depends on it.

Our lives have been engineered for stress. We wake up tense from poor sleep. We scroll before we think. We drink caffeine before we eat. We disassociate rather than face trauma head on. We live in a constant, low-grade state of urgency that never fully shuts off. And then we wonder why we’re anxious, inflamed, bloated, exhausted, disconnected, chronically ill- or stuck in endless cycles of “trying to get our life together”, but never quite getting there.

What no one really tells you is: You can’t heal a body that doesn’t feel safe. And right now, most nervous systems don’t.

We are living in a culture that asks people in chronic fight or flight to fix themselves using tools designed for regulated bodies: Meditate for 30 minutes. Commit to an hour-long yoga class. Sit in an infrared sauna. Journal deeply.

But if your nervous system is already overwhelmed, those things don’t feel supportive- they feel like more pressure.

When you’re stuck in fight-or-flight, your body is prioritizing survival. Not digestion. Not hormone balance. Not creativity. Not emotional processing. Not long-term healing. So of course it feels impossible to: stay consistent with habits, make “good” choices, sit still with your thoughts, follow through on routines, feel motivated or inspired. This isn’t a discipline problem. It’s a nervous system problem.

There’s a reason your hormonal acne won’t clear, your gut issues keep coming back and your pain lingers. Before the body can heal, it has to feel safe. When you provide your body with that sense of safety, you’re telling your nervous system: you don’t have to stay in protection mode anymore. You can shift your energy back to digestion, hormone balance, repair and regulation- the processes that only happen when the body is no longer bracing for impact.

Before supplements. Before protocols. Before productivity systems. You have to regulate your nervous system first. And not in an all-consuming way. Not in a way that requires motivation you don’t have. Regulation isn’t something you can take a pill for (even though some can support it), and it’s not something that happens overnight. It’s something you teach your body through daily repetition, and safety.

And that’s where “lazy girl” habits come in.

Lazy girl regulation isn’t doing nothing. It’s doing the smallest possible things that signal safety to your body- consistently (thats key). Think of it as meeting your nervous system where it is, not where you wish it were. You don’t go from fight or flight to inner monk overnight. You go from fight or flight to slightly calmer- and that’s where healing begins.

Below is a step-by-step framework to slowly shift your baseline without overwhelming yourself.

Step 1: Start your day without immediately activating stress.

Goal: Lower morning cortisol spikes (your cortisol is already highest in the morning, you don’t need to artificially surge it)

Lazy girl scientifically proven ways:

• No phone for the first 45-60 minutes of the day. Start with 5 minutes and gradually increase. Morning scrolling immediately activates your brain’s threat and reward centers, pushing your nervous system into sympathetic “alert” mode before your body has had a chance to orient itself. Delaying your phone allows your nervous system to wake up gradually, rather than defensively. The science supports more than just a regulated nervous system, but rather a happier, more productive, you.

• Get light in your eyes first thing. Morning light anchors your circadian rhythm and tells your brain when to release- and later lower- cortisol. When the signal is clear, your nervous system knows when to be alert and when to wind down, creating more stability throughout the day.

• Eat a high-protein breakfast within an hour of waking (and before caffeine). We are biologically wired to eat when exposed to dawn light. Providing food early tells your nervous system there’s no scarcity or threat, reducing the need for cortisol to surge. Protein, in particular, helps blunt stress hormone spikes and support nervous system regulation.

Step 2: Regulate before you try to “fix” anything.

Goal: Shift out of fight-or-flight before asking your body to perform. Let go of the expectation that you are going to heal overnight. Healing can happen in conjunction with nervous system regulation, but not before. This means utilizing daily vagus nerve stimulating tools to scientifically shift your body out of fight or flight and into rest and digest. Below are a few scientifically proven methods, that all take less than five minutes:

• This app has provided me with so many healing modalities. Every tool is grounded in science, designed to gently guide the body out of fight or flight and back into regulation. The instructors feel calming rather than performative. The sounds are grounding. The quotes feel intentional, not forced. Even the design itself signals safety. This link provides 30 days free if you want to try!

• Slow exhale breathing (longer exhales than inhales)

• Humming (breathe in and hum on your exhale- feel the vibration throughout your body)

• Ear pulling: your ears are filled with nerve endings- when you touch them, you help to stimulate the vague nerve (i’m telling you, do this right now. You will feel drastically different in seconds).

• Physiological Sigh: breathe in, then when you get to the top of your inhale, take another short inhale, then physically sigh and release the air out of your mouth. Drop your shoulders, and make your exhale longer than your inhale. Do this for several rounds.

• Legs up the wall: this position gently stimulates the vagus nerve, which helps shift your body out of fight-or-flight and into rest-and-digest. The vagus nerve plays a major role in heart rate variability, emotional regulation, digestion, and inflammation — all things that suffer when we’re chronically stressed.

• Lying on the floor. This posture reduces muscle guarding and sensory input, telling the nervous system it can relax.

• Gentle rocking: rhythmic motion mimics early soothing patterns and helps regulate the autonomic nervous system.

• Body scan: one of the simplest way to restore awareness to both the body and mind. A body scan pulls you out of disconnection and realigns your focus inward. Start by focusing on the top of your head and the sensations that arise. Just notice. Continue this process downward, over every inch of your body: your forehead, temples, nose, jaw, tongue, and beyond. At each point, pause for a few breaths. Soften where you can, and use your breath as an anchor.

Step 3: Build safety through repetition.

Goal: The more you teach your body to shift out of fight or flight and into rest and digest, the more adaptable your nervous system becomes. We cannot eliminate stress, but we can train our bodies to respond to it differently.

Regulation happens when:

• The habit is easy enough to do daily

• Your body starts to recognize the pattern

• Safety becomes familiar

Aim for five minutes everyday. Then aim for 5 minutes two times day. This will naturally build upon itself. When your nervous system starts to regulate, you don’t have to force discipline. Your capacity for self-regulation naturally returns. Your tolerance for misalignment fades, and your standards for living in alignment come back.

Step 4: Lower the bar for doing it right.

Goal: Remove pressure, which is itself, dysregulating.

If your nervous system is overwhelmed, do not create more pressure. Regulating might look like:

• Becoming aware of your breath for one minute

• Meditation as: bringing your hand to your heart, and simply becoming aware of your body through touch

• Journaling for one sentence

• Stretching as your form of movement

The takeaway is simple: Presence. Not perfection or intensity, just becoming aware. Making these moments small and frequent. Staying in touch with your body, breath and your internal state throughout the day.

Hum while you’re driving. Notice your breath during a workout. Be aware of your body as you fall asleep. These practices don’t require extra time or effort- they fit into the life you’re already living. And over time, they become the difference between a body thats disconnected and one that can finally begin to heal.

At its core, nervous system regulation is just a fancy phrase for something deeply human: slowing down, moving with intention, and learning how to be with ourselves again. And maybe that’s the work- slowing down enough to remember how to exist in our bodies the way we once did.

We wake up and immediately let the world speak first. And unfortunately, its repercussions have caught up with us- mentally and physically.

Before breath. Before thought. We scroll into other people’s lives and wonder why our nervous system never feels settled, why our energy feels borrowed instead of generated. Or symptomatically why: we have acne, we’re exhausted, we’re unhappy, were in pain, we’re bloated, inflamed and anxious.

We don’t wake up into ourselves anymore — we wake up into noise. And then we spend the rest of the day trying to regulate what we never gave space to in the first place.

This is biologically wrecking us.

Your brain and body are designed to follow a cortisol curve: cortisol should rise naturally in the morning, peak shortly after waking to give you energy and clarity, then gently taper off throughout the day. But most of us hijack that rhythm with:

• Immediate phone stimulation

• Lack of sunlight

• Stressful information

• Skipped nourishment

• Artificial caffeine spikes

Instead of following our natural cortisol curve, we are living in opposition to it. And the cost is enormous: dysregulated energy, anxiety, burnout, hormonal chaos, chronic fatigue, and the quiet feeling that we’re disconnected from our own lives.

Your morning is not just a routine. It’s the tone-setter for your nervous system, happiness, and productivity for the entire day.

This is the simple, scientifically backed morning routine that helped me start to feel like myself again- and scientifically regulated my cortisol giving me better energy, mental health, sleep, blood sugar, digestion and so much more. Really, the morning routine that brought me back to my most aligned self.

This doesn’t need to be all at once, start slow and build upon each habit.

1. No Phone for the First 45 Minutes to 1 Hour

This is the most important and the hardest. Your brain is in a highly suggestible state immediately after waking. What you expose it to first, sets your stress baseline for the day. This speech really helped engrain the importance of not using my phone in the morning and how it’s directly related to your ability to think in a complex manner, and thus your happiness.

When you reach for your phone immediately:

• You spike dopamine before your biology is awake

• You train your nervous system to look outward before inward, thus seeking quick dopamine hits throughout the day vs real stimulation.

• You delay your natural cortisol rhythm

• You fragment your ability to think deeply

This is not about discipline. It’s about protecting the most sensitive state of your brain.

The first hour is for: your own thoughts, your own breath, your own peace. This is how you connect to you highest self. This is how you set yourself up for success.

2. Morning Sunlight

Morning sunlight is one of the strongest circadian rhythm anchors we have. And to repeat myself, your circadian rhythm is a huge determinant for your health- from hormonal balance, to your energy, sleep health, metabolism, brain alertness, digestion and more. Even if it’s just five minutes- I try to go outside (in my pajamas), maybe lightly walk, or simply bask directly in the sun.

Within 10–30 minutes of waking, natural light:

• Signals your brain to stop melatonin production

• Locks in your cortisol rhythm for the day

• Improves sleep quality that night

• Supports hormone regulation

• Boosts mood and energy

This alone can radically change your sleep, mood, and baseline anxiety.

3. Red Light (optional but powerful)

Red light works at the mitochondrial level, helping support:

• Cellular energy production

• Skin and hair health

• Inflammation reduction

Think of it as a non-stimulating energy signal to your cells. I typically sit in front of my red light panel- there’s several brands I love but THIS is the one I have (code CLAIRE for a discount). If i’m not sitting in front of my panel, im using my red light face mask (CODE CLAIRECB). I pair my red light session with an Open meditation then end it with journaling- either scripting or my morning pages!

4. Journaling (Before the World Enters Your Mind)

This is where you reclaim your internal narrative. Before emails, texts, content, — you empty your mind onto paper and the benefits are life changing: from clearing mental residue before it impacts your mood, to regulating your nervous system by physically releasing your emotions rather than holding them in, improving focus and creativity, and quite literally strengthens your prefrontal cortex, teaching you how to properly respond to situations rather than quickly react.

I go back and forth between a few methods of journaling that each have their own benefits:

1. Morning Pages from The Artist’s Way: morning pages are three handwritten, stream-of-consciousness pages written first thing in the morning to clear mental noise, access creativity, and reconnect you to your inner voice before the world can influence your thoughts.

2. Scripting: the practice of writing your desired future in the present tense, training your brain to expect and move toward the life you want.

3. JournalSpeak by Nicole Sachs: An expressive writing exercise to help people with chronic pain and other persistent chronic symptoms. Specifically utilizing a practice to help people work through repressed trauma.

This is how you stop carrying yesterday into today. This is how you release repressed emotions and make way for living in your true alignment.

5. Morning Meditation or Nervous System Regulation

This does not need to be a 30-minute meditation.

It can be:

• 3 minutes of slow breathing

• A body scan

• Humming

• Gentle stretching

• A long exhale practice

This teaches your nervous system something most of us were never taught:
you can enter the day regulated, not reactive.

Over the past four years I have pretty much solely used the app Open- this link will give you 30 days free to try! It has truly changed my life. If you think breathwork or meditation isn’t for you, or you haven’t ever found a way to stick with it. This app will change that for you- from their science backed techniques, their amazing instructors, even the design of the app. Everything is perfect.

6. High-Protein Breakfast

This is where so many people unintentionally sabotage their entire day- skipping breakfast all together or consuming caffeine before food. I genuinely cannot emphasize enough how eating breakfast within an hour of waking has changed my health for the better- from my digestion, bloat, energy, hormonal balance, skin. This daily habit changed how I feel.

A high-protein breakfast:

• Stabilizes blood sugar

• Prevents cortisol spikes

• Supports focus and mood

• Reduces cravings later in the day

• Protects hormonal balance

Protein within an hour of waking tells your body:
We are nourished. We are not in survival mode.

Coffee on an empty stomach trains your body to run on stress.

The Truth About This Routine

This is not about being perfect. This is about alignment.

Alignment with:

• Your circadian rhythm

• Your cortisol curve

• Your nervous system

• Your attention

• Your sense of self

You don’t need to do all of this tomorrow. Start with:

• No phone

• Sunlight

• Protein

Everything else builds naturally once your body starts feeling safe again.

Because when you stop waking up to the world and start waking up to yourself, something subtle but profound happens:

You stop living in reaction. You start living in your highest self. This is when happiness comes seamlessly, this is when success starts feeling easy. This is when you thrive.

Somewhere along the way, we forgot how to sit with our thoughts. Not just silence- but real thoughts. Ones with edges, weight and conclusions. Now the moment something feels slow or unexciting, our hands scroll and refresh. Not even a thirty-minute TV show can hold most of our attention without the simultaneous pull of Instagram.

We are overstimulated, under reflective, and starving for meaning. Over the last few months, I started noticing just how reflexive my social media addiction had become- the way my thumb would return to Tik Tok twelve seconds after closing it. Looking for what? Dopamine? Novelty? Escape? That’s when I realized, I hadn’t just lost my attention span. I had lost my brain to the Internet.

We’ve lost the ability to sit with thought- our own, or anyone else’s- because we live inside a dopamine machine that trains us to crave quick hits of stimulation instead of deep satisfaction. And because the way we begin our day- grabbing our phones first thing, letting thousands of voices, opinions and blue light flood our brains, we set the tone for how we seek dopamine for the rest of the day. We live in loops of wanting, instead of states of being. Maybe because were scared to just be? Scared to hear our own thoughts?

As we move into 2026 and new goals feel top of mind, I remembered something both uncomfortable and hopeful: attention can be reclaimed. It always goes where we choose. A hard pill to swallow, because this means the internet didn’t take my brain- I gave it away. But, it also means I can take it back.

And the reason I want it back is simple: I want to change my life. I want to become the person I set out to be every January 1st. As perfectly said in 101 Essays That’ll Change The Way You Think- the fastest way to change your life, means changing how you think- and to change how you think, you have to change what you consume. With an attention span of three seconds, I can tell you i’m not learning anything all that meaningful.

Most of us live the same daily loop: wake up, work, cook, maybe see a friend, maybe get a workout in- and whatever time is left gets handed to “self care” or rotting. I am sick of rotting unintentionally. I am sick of post doom scroll guilt. I am sick of not learning or evolving.

So, this month, I tried replacing the chase. This is everything I chose instead of doomscrolling- the inputs that began to change how I think, learn and grow.

Physically reading: Just Kids by Patti Smith- her love letter to NYC, to authentic creation, and to her relationship with photographer and artist Robert Mapplethorpe. If you are looking for creative inspiration- start here.

Audibly reading: Tom Lake by Ann Patchet, performed by Meryl Steep. A warm story about a mother recounting a long- ago summer romance with a future famous actor to her daughters. A fun story that makes you think about the lives we imagine vs the lives we choose. I love audiobooks for moments when my hands are busy but my mind is free- cleaning, walking, cooking.

Substack: It quickly became my favorite form of social media- but instead of feeling doom, comparison and noise after scrolling, I feel inspired, motivated, and informed. I’ll continue to repost some of my latest reads here.

Pinterest: My visual thinking space- for outfit inspiration, home design, and mood boards for my life, work and future.

Journaling: Specifically scripting and Morning Pages from The Artist’s Way. Scripting is the practice of writing your desired future in the present tense, training your brain to expect and move toward the life you want. Morning pages are three handwritten, stream-of-consciousness pages written first thing in the morning to clear mental noise, access creativity, and reconnect you to your inner voice before the world can influence your thoughts.

No phone walks

Building my journal ecosystem (a whole separate post coming)

Listening to Dr. Arthur Brooks’ lecture on The Art and Science of Happiness and how phones train us out of complex thinking- and therefore out of lasting happiness. This speech is what set me down the path of getting off my phone in the morning and breaking the doom scroll cycle.

To be Magnetic Program: A manifestation and self-reprogramming program created by Lacy Phillips that’s based on changing your subconscious beliefs- not just your mindset- through techniques like deep imaginings, neural re-patterning, and parts work, so you’re no longer manifesting from fear, lack, or old trauma, but from self-worth and alignment.

The way you change your life is not by changing your circumstances, it’s by changing how you think. And the way you change how you think, is by changing what you allow to shape your attention. We like to believe happiness is something we find. But it is something we train- quietly, daily and on purpose.

Subscribe now