i had evening plans
ones that i was excited about

as i began the drive downtown
i took a left 
instead of a right

a glimpse of the sunset
caught my attention

an invention

i've seen a lot of sunsets

yet, none
like this one

its extra golden glow
broadcasting out
behind a cloud

more shouting
then speaking 
or whispering

not asking for acknowledgement 

just being

the beauty 
that it is

as i sat
and soaked it in

knowing that i was 
where i needed to be

once a year
the jazz fest

not to be missed

bringing so many
together

to gather

tonight
nature had different plans

rain continuously providing the rhythm 

with spontaneous entrances 
of thundering bass
shattering symbols

all withheld
within
the freedom of the wind

ensuring that no two choruses 
would be alike

natural harmony
at its finest

at once simple
yet complex

not knowing what would be next

with the best seat in the house
on the covered back deck

to avoid being wet

yet dripping 
with amazement

at an evening 
full of entertainment

the sun then peaked
through the clouds
taking the final bow

as the trees
and i stood tall

applauding
grateful for it all

an evening hike
coming to an end

layers of green growth
dancing in the wind

bloom on top of bloom
this time of year

mind finally still
after a week of meetings
mentioning AI
filled with fear

podcast
after podcast
talking to the threat of AI
what jobs will still be here

as i see the first monarch
of the night
floating and dancing
at the same time

side stepping
to avoid ants
on their way 
together
as they 
tend to do

with the robin
beginning her song

as our star
begins to fall
below the horizon
with it's show
for all

who take time
to see

surrounded by the true
intelligence
the gifts
always
giving
by following
the natural laws

nothing artificial

everything
real

alive

letting go of the week
with each step on the trail

feeling lighter and lighter
with each mile

remembering what it feels like
not to carry all that extra
weight

that is not mine
that i can not control

the earth is good 
like that

consistent
like that

taking all that we let go
on the trails

transforming 

reminding us
of the beauty
that we are always
surrounded by

inviting us

to sit

to listen

to feel

what it is like
being in nature

being a part 
of nature

being powerful

being love

being creative

being harmony

being true

 being devoted

being free

spring rain
all day

not much to say

just a lot of listening
to what wants to be heard

as the trees sway

the birds wait
to continue their songs
of the day

as i hear
somewhere
on a distance trail
the first petal
of a wildflower
begin to open

as i say
i am on my way
to meet you

soon

no wind
today
no waves
the lake reflecting
as a mirror
any thoughts
as they fade away

a few moments of silence

noticing
buds
on the branches of the trees
smiling
of what's to come
we made it
memories of winter
fading away

a few moments of connection

her smile
contagious
saying hi
to all who pass by
in the back seat
of her father's bike
fading away around the corner

a few moments of joy

the fisherman
in the same place
as when i started
still
not to scare the fish
or maybe
enjoying 
being still
as any separation
fades away

lasting peace

the gifts
of a walk around
the neighborhood lake

the unseen
being seen

as the morning mist
lifts

background of blue
glimpses of you

silently waiting 
as you always do

all going about our journeys
in circles

if realized 
or not

another beginning
followed by an ending
opening to a beginning

you remind me
that we are never alone

that we are all a piece
of something greater

if realized
or not

as the quiet in you
points to the quiet in me

that place
where we all create from

begin from

return to

if realized
or not

i stopped at the stationary store today
bought a new pocket journal and pen
japanese
high quality
to write something important
with the news in the middle east

sitting at the window
of the coffeehouse
watching the protesters
instead of writing

page still blank
packing up my backpack
to head to the trails

only car at the parking lot
again
this time of year

the silence of the trail
was a welcomed distraction
from the busyness 
of the world
of my mind

anger and fear
lifting
a little

the lake still frozen
except for the middle
where i noticed
an eagle
sitting on the edge
where the ice met the water

sitting still
yet powerful
with her eyes fixed
at the center of the water

waves from the wind 
flowing onto the ice
at her feet
unmoved
looking
deep into the lake
to find nourishment
lunch

reminding me to sit
still
on the edge of the lake
where the ice met the earth

following my new friends example
looking
deep inside
to find the stillness
beneath the waves 
of anger and fear
being nourished 
by the peace
that still exists
at the center of myself

the center of all

surrounded by it

the scent of the pine needles
even on a cold winter day 

the sun dancing 
off of the waves
that break free 
of a mostly ice covered lake

the moon 
sneaking over the horizon
almost full
in no rush

the quiet
that surrounds
peace

all just being
what they were meant to be

not trying to control
be better or more powerful
than the other

dancing to music
that the heart hears
when it's clear

always inviting others
to join

feels like -21

already cold
just getting out of the car

wasn't going to let it be 
another weekend
inside

cabin fever
without the cabin

just a fever
to see
feel

walking on the quiet, hard trail
committed to not turning back
until i can't feel my face

checking to see if i can still smile
a sign to keep going

too cold
for even the bluejays and cardinals
this morning

even my thoughts
freeze quickly 
incomplete
and fall
from my awareness

leaving 
just an openness
like the blank
gray sky above

until the eagles come
one after another
north to south
fourteen
somewhere important to go
or calling it a day
before midday

not able to smile now
time to turn around
as the wind 
causes my eyes to water
instantly freezing
my eyelids

returning
with barely being able to see
feel

while smiling deep inside
knowing that i saw
and felt
what it is
to be 
alive

the only one
at the trailhead 

again

greeted by various shades
of brown and grey

the trail 
rock hard
closing itself 
to keep the warmth in

a flash of a fox
busy
doing its daily
territorial round

abandoned bird nests
one after another
waiting for spring

the lake covering itself 
with a thick sheet of ice
to keep the warmth in

the sun not yet saying hello
no sign of the setting full moon
all embraced by fog and clouds

checking in
to see if i can feel
my fingers and toes
to keep going or
turn around

the eagles
fly quietly
overhead

nothing wasting energy 
this time of year

as i get more silent
with each step
until silence is listening to silence
as a soft bliss
keeping the warmth within

the one that is always playing
in the background

sometimes soft
most of the time
loud

telling me it can't be done
limiting the fun

the old story

feels so near
filled with fear

like a wall
keeping me from experiencing
all

until seeing a ladder
red
reaching high
into the sky

climbing up
not looking down

stepping off 
above the clouds
of despair

breathing in the fresh air
finally
seeing clear

walking into the new year

as the old story
fades 
disappears

so hard 
to leave it all behind

a full day
high in the mountains
above the clouds
closer to the sun
with sight
of no one

lungs full of fresh air
mind clear
absent of despair

time standing still

until
the sun begins to set

soaking it all in
on the descent

to be welcomed
by the open space
as the valley 
always does

making room
accepting it all

teaching me everything
i need to know

settling into the sounds 
of the streams
and the blackbird calls

reminding me of the life
i live 
most days of the week

still touching the joy
from the mountains
amplified by the valley
that no one can take away

mine to share
freely
equally 
with all
along the way

sometimes i can feel it

mostly when walking slow on the trails

there is the solidness
foundation
of the earth

this is different

softer

encompassing
my whole body
not leaving any part
left out

an extension

at the same time
a part of me

the feeling
of dancing with me

as me
outside of me
all around me

filled with peace

free
and at the same time
fully embraced

being
forever 
held

sorry to keep you waiting

staying up late 
all those lonely nights
reaching for a hand 
that was nowhere to be found
yet still reaching

believing

i was lost

walking in the woods
along the ocean shores
waiting to be found

only to discover

i needed to find myself 
true self
within 
first

to bring my fullness
completeness
to your side

to hold your hand firmly

completely

in all the woods
along all the ocean shores
to come

together

“of all the paths you take in life
make sure a few of them are dirt” (and sand : )

- john muir

as the clouds fade 
into the sunlight
and the dawn
turns into day

i exhale
letting go

being still

a freedom 
not invited
yet, welcomed

as the dew drops
drop

as the cardinal sings
unseen

the wind
turns

so do i

going forward
into 
a new beginning
again

miles into the trail
at bead lake
in northern washington

i would enter the enchanted forest

most times of the year
being the only one there

surrounded by quietness
under the giants
that reached to the sky

with rays of light
breaking through
here and there
like the windows
in a european cathedral

finding the bench
that overlooked the lake
in between the pines

feeling the aliveness
all around
and within

after awhile
and not sure why

i started to sing
more sounds than words
from a place of joy

with the feeling of the trees
leaning in
and still not sure how
joining
with a circular breeze
dancing from tree to tree
in perfect harmony

as i feel silent
to listen closer
with my full body
being

as the forest sang

and sang
knowing someone was listening

as i sit here tonight
years later
if i'm quiet enough
still feeling
and hearing 
their gift

sitting
on the back deck
following the breath

the cool touch
of the morning breeze
surrounded by the heat
of the day to come

listening to the news
inside
for the feel
of now

giving attention
listening
to any areas
that are not open
not flowing

relaxing
resting
deeper
eventually with ease

helping to replace
the potential storms
of the day 
with a forecast
of kindness
peace
and joy

as the rain dances on the window
with an occasional spotlight
from the distant lightning

i lose my place again
on the page of the book
i've been attempting to read 

unsure if it is the invitation from the storm
or what i was reading
that draws my mind to a faraway place
that feels so near

a location with many glimpses 
through the years
most brief
others
visited while asleep
or deep in meditation

always returning
with a deep sense of peace
a belief
that it is possible

a place
where harmony
well-being
goodness
are the norm

where love and wisdom
are the highest currency
shared among all

as the thunder
brings me back
to the page on my book
wondering which
is real
or the dream

either way

reminding myself
to do my part
even if it is just a little part
with some days better than others
to help transform this dream
into the reality

or wake up from this dream
into the reality

as the lightning and thunder outside
answered
"both" 
with a loud flash

as the rain stopped
and all became quiet

even golden