I genuinely think stories stay with you more than non-fiction one liners because of their characters, relatable situations & deep emotions connected to them. Also, it’s such a solitary process that you can personalise it. It’s your imagination. It’s you giving a face to the character. It’s you living in an imaginary world.

You pick up what’s personal to you. You decide what you want to take out of that story. Every book can mean different things to different people because our perspectives are so diverse. And I think this process makes it so interesting.

I read 43 fictional books in 2025 (I will write about them separately), but here are 13 books that I read in 2026 so far with my genuine takes.

1. Welcome to the Hyunam-dong Bookshop by Hwang Bo-reum:

“A life surrounded by good people is a successful life. It might not be success as defined by society, but thanks to the people around you, each day is a successful day’.”

This book found me at the right time because, like the main character (Yeongju), I was exhausted with my corporate life. This story stayed with me because of the relatable characters & their personal development arc.

If you are someone who is stuck in the hustle culture and continuously feels like you don’t deserve rest, this book is for you. It is extremely comforting & healing with an easy-to-read plotline.

2. The door-to-door bookstore by Carsten Hen

“Paper is carbon, he thought. We humans are the same. Books and humans are made of the same stuff.”

A 72-year-old bookseller, Carl Kolhof, meets a 9-year-old Schascha while distributing books to people’s doors. It explores deep emotions from loneliness to friendship of different kinds. I was in tears after 50% of the book.

If you want to think about your grandfather who loved books and socialising while sitting on a chair next to a window, you should read this book. It will make you chuckle & shed a tear with a warm hug.

3. Passion Project by London Sperry

“Having your shit together is not a prerequisite for love.”

This book changed my brain chemistry a little, especially related to relationships & friendships. Henry helps Bennet Taylor (who is struggling in her life after the death of her boyfriend) to find her passion while spending every weekend exploring New York City.

It is a very sweet 2000s romcom-coded story exploring healing, finding a spark & of course passion for life in your 20s. If you need hope and a little push to give life a second chance, you have to read this book.

4. The lost bookshop by Evie Woods

“It didn’t matter whether the decision you made was right or wrong, as long as you made it. That’s what moved you along in life.”

This book took me the longest to finish because it was so lengthy and abrupt at times. I wouldn’t personally recommend this to anyone who wants to read a good story, but it definitely made me respect women from different periods of time.

It is a story of three characters (Opaline, Martha and Henry) in different timelines facing their own struggles, including alcoholism, domestic abuse, and wartime violence, while being connected to a lost bookshop. It could have been a lot better because it has magical realism, but the depth and pacing suffered in the plot.

5. The Wedding People by Alison Espach

“Life is strange. Always thinking that this one thing is going to make you happy. Because then you get it. And then you’re maybe not as happy as you imagined you would be. Because every day is just every day. Like happiness becomes so big you have no choice but to live inside it. Until you can no longer see or feel it. And so you start to fixate on something else.”

Phoebe Stone wants to end her life in her 40s on an island wearing a green dress and gold heels because her “perfect” married professor life falls apart, but there is a wedding of a crazy family in the hotel. It is so well written with utmost humour & tenderness that will make you look at things differently.

There were times when I was a little frustrated with the story, but you have to go with the flow because this is not a typical story. It is about mental health, womanhood & the range of emotions of human struggles with love life & personal choices.

6. Book Lovers by Emily Henry

“Is there anything better than iced coffee and a bookshop on a sunny day? I mean, aside from hot coffee and a bookstore on a rainy day.”

Who am I to even say the goddess of romcom Miss Emily Henry is not good at what she does?!?!? This is my third Emily Henry book, & of course I think this one is the best :).

Nora Stephens keeps bumping into her annoying client Charlie Lastra in a small town during her vacation with her little sister. The banter in enemies-to-lovers tropes. The depth of each & every character in the plot. Every intimate dialogue in the most iconic scenes. Miss Henry smashed it. Read it and thank me later.

7. Beautiful World, Where Are You? by Sally Rooney

“Maybe we’re just born to love and worry about the people we know and to go on loving and worrying even when there are more important things we should be doing.”

All Sally Rooney fans, please skip this part if you don’t want to ruin your day because I have a serious love-hate relationship with this woman’s writing. There are so many things that are morally wrong with the characters, but beyond that, the story still sucked so bad.

Alice (a famous writer) is living in a small town for a while, where she meets Felix (who disrespects her in every way possible, but she still hangs out with him because she is self-deprecating.) Her best friend Eileen writes letters while being 29 with no social life or sense of direction. The book tried really hard to capture the restlessness of being an adult with stories & metaphors from different timelines but didn’t work for me.

8. Have a Little Faith by Mitch Albom

“Nothing haunts us like the things we don’t say.”

After reading Tuesdays with Morrie (ICONIC), I can read anything that Mitch Albom writes. Of course even this book didn’t disappoint because it’s a real-life story of two men from different communities and different faiths leading different lives. It made me think about faith a lot.

If you are looking for a short read to make you believe in bigger powers, this story will perfectly blow your mind.

9. The seven husbands of Evelyn Hugo by Taylor Jenkins Reid

“People think that intimacy is about sex. But intimacy is about truth. When you realise you can tell someone your truth, when you can show yourself to them, when you stand in front of them bare and their response is ‘You’re safe with me’- that’s intimacy.”

I was not ready to actually change my brain settings when I picked up this book, but it still transformed me in the best way possible. It is such a well-written historical fiction about Hollywood icon Evelyn Hugo revealing her scandalous & glamorous life to a magazine reporter.

There is so much reality & depth in the story that it will break the ground beneath your feet. It is about ruthless ambition, fame, and a great forbidden love for a woman in the ‘80s. It will inspire, shake & break you at the same time.

10. Love, Theoretically by Ali Hazelwood

“I like to see you. When you’re not trying to be someone else.”

If you haven’t dived into the world created by the iconic Miss Ali Hazelwood, you are missing out on one of the best romcom stories. Theoretical physicist Elsie Hannaway, who shifts her personality to please other people, meets Jack Smith, who sees her beneath her layers.

The story made me believe in love in its rawest form with all the chaos & doubts it comes with. It is about academic pressure, self-image & the enemies-to-lovers trope. Too much theoretical knowledge will suck your blood a little, but overall the story is comforting to read.

11. Hot chocolate on a Thursday by Michiko Aoyama

A cosy Japanese novel about a cafe in Tokyo with multiple characters and their interconnected stories. It was a very short read that offered warmth through characters of different age groups living their peaceful lives.

If you are looking for a short book to read while having hot chocolate in a tiny cafe during autumn, this is the one. You don’t have to carry your brain too much with the story.

12. The nightingale by Kristin Hannah

“But love has to be stronger than hate, or there is no future for us.”

I have always loved well-articulated historical fiction after reading “A Thousand Splendid Suns” by Khalid Hosseini. I thought nothing could beat that until my friend suggested this book. It is not for everyone unless you want to experience the suffering of war times.

Fearless 18-year-old Isabelle tries her best to help people in France during World War 2 as her sister Vianne suffers because of the Germans while living with her daughter. It will absolutely break your heart but teach you the meaning of love & loss.

13. Yesteryear by Caro Claire Burke

“The way some women so willingly compromised every ounce of themselves in the name of building a life for themselves that they didn’t enjoy.”

I picked up this book by just reading the description “Christian influencer who curates a perfect “tradwife” life in rural Idaho, wakes up in 1855”. The story had more potential, but it was not handled 100% well. There are a lot of controversial topics to talk about regarding the characters.

It is not a conventional story because there is an unreliable narrator who is very unlikable. Somewhere there are people like this out in the world who build their entire lives by pretending to like something they absolutely hate. If you want to be confused, unsettled & stunned, you can give it a try.

I genuinely think no book is a bad book because there will always be the right audience for everything that is created. So I’m here to just share what my experience was with these stories, but at the end it’s your responsibility to try & see what you like.

We are allowed to have different tastes.

So I hope the right stories always find you.

Please recommend good books to me in the comments.

I NEED THEM.

No offence to anyone with specific beliefs when it comes to what is acceptable and what is not. Of course you get to choose that for yourself. But it also made me reflect on how much we make people and ourselves walk on a pedestal that we forget we are humans at the end of it all.

I used to have very specific tastes in people, and I wouldn’t tolerate certain choices. If you are non-vegetarian, we can’t be friends. If you smoke or drink, I can’t sit with you. If you don’t like art, we can’t have a conversation. And I bet you had these unspoken lists of things in your head at some point in life. Maybe about religion, different ideas or other specific topics. We create a checklist to categorise what makes a person good or bad.

But with time I realised these rules can’t actually filter the “bad people” out because that’s not how it works.

Humans are not that simple.

We have to see people beyond what they show us. Beyond their choices. Beyond their opinions. Beyond their reactions.

Just because a person reacts too quickly doesn’t mean they have bad intentions; they just have a nervous system that gets triggered easily. Just because someone shows care through anger doesn’t mean they are rude; that’s just how they received love. Just because someone has old-fashioned beliefs doesn’t mean they are harmful; they just grew up with that environment.

Whenever I get hurt by someone, my first emotion is anger. I don’t actually want to hurt back, but I do end up hurting people I love the most. At times I do say things I don’t mean. At times I don’t know how to react, so I give the silent treatment. I still don’t know how this brain and nervous system thing works together. But this very struggle makes me a human, and I wouldn’t want to be anything else.

“Perfection is inhuman. What evokes our love is the imperfection of the human being.”

-Joseph Campbell

Recently I was at a storytelling fest with my best friend, where we saw my favourite poet (let’s name him Joy) standing in the crowd. There was loud music, so everyone was dancing in their groups, and the first thing my best friend said was “I feel so weird watching Joy dance with his friends because he is so soulful on stage.” And I said “Of course he is allowed to be both. He can be philosophical for his audience but also fun for his friends. That’s the whole point.”

One of the most important life lessons that I learned is that we shouldn’t put people on a tightrope for them to prove if they are worthy of being in our lives. We can like different shades of blue but still share a room. We can be so different that we laugh at each other but still hold respect and safe space. At the end of the day we all deserve to be accepted and loved for who we are with all our complexities in order to create a better world.

We all had our own share of ups and downs and struggles we can’t talk about. We somehow lifted more than our body weight because we had to. Nobody applauded at times. Nobody saw you sitting on your bathroom floor with your broken pieces. Nobody congratulated you for surviving that year which looked glamorous from outside.

We never actually know anyone completely, no matter how much time we share, so I urge you to at least see people that you love beyond their superficial layer. Allow imperfection in your life. Allow people to bring more different aspects of themselves. Allow yourself to fall in love even with differences. Because that’s what makes this planet the most interesting one.

Also, it will help you to be more kind to yourself if you’re generous to people around you.

Always remember the complexity itself makes us human.

Even when I used to see opportunities from far away, I used to start sulking that I wouldn’t get this one because they had the potential to change my life (maybe in a good or a bad way), which was an uncomfortable thought for my brain.

Not just in a big career or love life decision kind of way, but in every small step that I took, I moved with disappointment. I was extremely pessimistic. I kept telling everyone around me, including myself, that nothing ever works out for me. And of course that’s what I received in return.

Until I tried to change the narrative. Some call it manifestation or inner calling or angles guiding you. Everything changed when I discovered curiosity. This might sound minuscule, but if you take it seriously, it will take you to places.

“The universe buries strange jewels deep within us all and then stands back to see if we can find them.”

― Elizabeth Gilbert, Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear

As an adult, I followed everything that made me nervous and at the same time excited. Something that’s so not me but that I can’t die without experiencing. When my heart runs a marathon, but my mind tells me I need this dopamine.

For example: being on stage in front of strangers after being an introvert my whole life. Jumping in the middle of the cold sea after years of having nightmares of wild tides. Finally meeting old friends after hours of social anxiety. Posting a reel of my biceps on Instagram after years of hiding it behind loose clothes. Attending Spoken Fest alone after years of dreaming about it. Talking to strangers casually because I knew I could connect.

I did all these things & so many more in the last 3 years because I stopped moving with fear and a narrow mindset. I loved it a little, but I was genuinely tired of my own damn life. Like, what do you mean, while taking my last breath, I might sulk, thinking this is not what I wanted?

Once I tasted the joy as a dessert after following my curiosity, I became obsessed with it. People always say your actual life is waiting for you on the other side of your fears, & I think the bridge of curiosity will take you there. For a reason you get excited about certain things. For a reason different things matter to different people.

If as a kid you couldn’t follow that curiosity, now is the time. No matter what your age.

“You owe yourself a life well lived.”

Even if it’s as small as going to a theater alone because nobody else wants to watch that movie, writing and posting one paragraph on Substack, going to that event where you know you belong, saying yes to impromptu trips and a gazillion other things pull you, but you are a little scared to go down that path. Make things happen when you know you want them.

Even now I invite a number of people before going to any special event, and I receive rejection just to get a text later “God you are so lucky you get to do that.”

Umm, let me say it out loud.

The universe is not on a budget.

Everyone does get the chance to live to the fullest.

It’s you who have to learn how to grab life with every cell of your body.

Sulking won’t take you to places.

Being gutsy, curious, & saying yes will.

There are stories, places & people out there who will effortlessly change your life for the better. You just have to stop sulking that your life sucks.

And it made me stop and think about how much we waste our energy when we come across shallow, insecure & absolutely dumb people. How much these people get on our nerves by simply existing.

It is so easy for them to ruin our day by pushing our buttons.

Why do we let them do it?

Why do we give our non-returnable time and energy to something insignificant?

I sat & reflected on incidents when I was wasting my energy and time on foolish people in the surroundings. That one immature friend. That bully in the college. That body shaming aunty. That one sexist boy at the gym.

I realised we give them so much importance that they start feeling more confident because they know they have powers to piss you off. In reality their actions are so trivial and childish that we should be laughing at them.

It’s literally like watching a bunch of pigs playing in the dirty mud. Instead of moving on from it at times we decide to sit and watch and complain and feel disgusted about it. So much so that they start affecting our thoughts, our day and our mood.

“You should think of your energy as if it’s expensive, as if it’s like a luxury item. Not everyone can afford it.”

-taylor swift

Somewhere we all have this hidden urge to “fix things” while walking around the world and it’s great till a point. But we need to fix ourselves if we feel the urge to get in the dirt just to put sense in a pig’s head. It’s not your damn responsibility my friend.

“You’re not the one in charge.”

- Kristin Hannah, The Nightingale

You should know what deserves your time because when you put your energy into something irrelevant it overpowers you and will attempt to damage you in return. Also, if you spend your time, thoughts and attention on petty things, you won’t be available to live your own damn life.

My best friend always says you should react to a problem based on its importance. If you panic over pointless incidents on a daily basis, you won’t know what to do when a do or die situation comes. You have to decide what matters in order to know what to ignore.

At times it does get hard to move on from frustrating situations because you have a good character, but you have to read the audience, buddy. We have to see and accept people as they are. Again, you can’t yell at a donkey to make him act mature. It’s not worth your mental health.

You have a better purpose to serve on this planet. Better people to be with. Better topics to discuss. Better things to get excited about. Something way better deserves your attention more than pigs playing in the mud.

“You are not powerful enough to ruin God’s plan.”

- Martina Griffin

Leaving you with this quote because I know you want to “correct” people/situations at the cost of your peace and valuable time:)

Lift that pressure off your shoulders.

Now you are free.

Not just in a romantic relationship but also in our friendships, in our families and in our correspondence. One time someone took advantage of our giving nature and backstabbed us; we immediately pushed all the brakes.

As a deeply emotional woman in her 20s, I had to learn to build mental walls up in order to protect myself. take every decision with pros and cons in mind. not give too much too easily. not be too available because then in return, you’ll not be valued.

From my generation Z, we have publicly listed thousands or more do’s & don’ts, basic expectations and rules in the name of boundaries & “bare minimum” to protect ourselves from the hurt.

Don’t text first. Show like you don’t care to look cool. Always act like you have options. Don’t get attached for a few months or a year at least. Never fully trust anyone.

but I also believe: “You’re what you give. Not what you receive.”

I’m not saying boundaries and expectations are wrong, but we will forget how to love on the way if we run behind ticking invisible boxes whenever we are with a person. You should be all realistic while choosing a partner and your circle, but love is not supposed to be strategic and well calculated.

If you have to think and analyse what to say and how to be then either you have to change the people around you or your mindset.

Our generation often feel like they wasted their time and energy on a person when it ends after a certain point but why are we measuring the worth of the experience by longevity? We are obsessed with the “number of years” we are together to put it in a caption on social media to prove that it’s successful, as if duration is the only thing validating intimacy.

“The one who is in love always wins. It doesn’t matter if you get heartbroken; you’re living. When you’re feeling you are alive. The sun doesn’t care whether the grass appreciates its rays right, it just keeps on shining. That’s you.”

-Ethan Hawke.

I was talking to my best friend after facing disappointment in a situation and he said “Love is supposed to be unconditional. Expecting anything in return is not part of the process”. No matter how hard it is to accept, considering love in a transactional manner is a horrible mistake we all make.

I don’t want to think if I’ll get the equal quantity in return while sharing a part of me in love. In every small or big way, if I’m choosing to love, I want to love with my bare heart and wide-open arms. With depth and no doubt. Because it has always made me better whenever I focused on expressing more than receiving.

“We are already doing everything cautiously. Let’s not add love to that list.”

-Kristen Hannah, The Nightingale.

Personally, I am most alive and my most authentic self whenever I love with every cell of my body. in a romantic prospect or in any other relationship. I carry myself with more courage in places I never would have been if I wasn’t in love.

It’s the most transformative experience when you adore and care for someone so much that you don’t know any other way to be but just give whatever you have. You see a human for who they are with flaws, fears and insecurities and still feel the urge to hold them close with warmth of love in your chest.

I wish even my worst enemy, or hater finds love because it is one of the major life experiences you shouldn’t die without. It will change you in the best way possible as my favourite author Elif Shafak said “If we are the same person before and after we loved that means we haven’t loved enough”.

Even if you face heartbreak, come back and choose love. for yourself. If we fill the world with people who know how to be lovers, we will have enough love to receive in return. Everything else is so not the point.

& trust me deep down we all are lovers wanting to be loved deeply. Let’s stop pretending to be cool. It’s not worth it.

After a couple of years, we don’t want to remember what went wrong. what was the last fight about. exactly when it started falling apart. the tiny details of hurt. numerous unanswered questions. All these things leave us alone with longing for love.

“I guess when you are young, you believe that you will meet many people with whom you’ll connect with, but later in life you realize it only happens a few times.”

― before sunrise

& as humans we love love. Even if you don’t accept it loudly. We do remember the exact perfume we used to crave. The warmth of someone’s hug. The sound of their laughter. The songs they used to dance to. The places you walked hand in hand. All the inside jokes, every little “our thing”, their favourite street food, the god they worshipped, the way they looked at the ocean, the golden sunlight falling on their face.

We all have these details in a tight closed box that sits on the top shelves in our minds that we don’t look at every day. You wake up every morning to work for a meaningful future and be a strong independent individual because that’s what adulthood asks you to be. You are totally different version of yourself because you don’t want this people to see the old one.

There are times you seek warmth, but you don’t feel it around you so you go back home and open that tight closed box. When you are in your bed tired with life while staring at the ceiling, you decide to take a break from the present and the future. You read one line of poetry or listen to their favourite song, and you are back reliving the memories of your forgotten life.

“You squeeze my hand three times in the back of the taxi

I can tell that it’s gonna be a long road”

- new year’s day, taylor swift

People often perceive nostalgia in a negative way but i think it’s perfectly normal to sit in front of a bonfire for some time because you miss the cozy winter while living in humid summer. You want to have that small slice of comfort. Moments where you felt deeply loved. When you had innocence in you. Times when you were just living in the present.

You close your eyes to remember the song that played in the background when you look at the moon while standing with them. You remember how they put toothpaste on their brush. You remember the t-shirt, the promises, printed pictures & every little ordinary memory that makes you smile.

You read the old conversations to hold that old you a little. You go back to your archived Instagram stories to go through your past life. You unblock people just to see them smiling in their profile picture. You pray that it’s okay if they hate you, but you don’t want them to hate themselves. You wish that life is kind to them.

I think part of moving forward in life is leaving people behind without ever consciously deciding to lose them. Day after day you try to learn how to live without them until one day your mind stops reminding you of them. They come in fleeting moments as reminders that you lived. In love.

“Time, mystical time

Cutting me open, then healing me fine.”

- invisible string, taylor swift

The next morning comes and you wake up because you still have places to go. people to love. art to create. You always take a step forward when you get out of bed. Music still makes you dance without thinking of them. You see fiction characters with different perspectives. Joyful people find you to make your life worthwhile. On the way you understand the value of your energy. Your peace.

So as long as you breathe you have endless possibilities of living moments you will look back on. Make sure you create enough of them. because at the end of the life our lives are just collection of memories we feel nostalgic about.

“The only thing that’s left is the manuscript.

One last souvenir from my trip to your shores.

Now and then I re-read the manuscript

But the story isn’t mine anymore.”

– manuscript, taylor swift

Of course, I had a hard time finding meaningful friendships in teenage years because of my own self-worth, immature environment and extremely limited options. A lot of people say you are never going to find a good friend circle after school and college but I’m here to tell you that’s a lie.

People often find numerous superficial friendships in college where they have a really good time together, but these are just fleeting connections. As a teenager you always feel like an odd man out in every other group even when you want so hard to belong there. No matter how much you try to “fit in” and be on the same wavelength with people it never feels enough.

As a teenager, your sense of self is so fragile and dependent on other people’s opinion that you keep trying to hide it all behind a “cool”, “funny”, “easy to be with” friend. There is always this feeling that people around you have it all figured out because they have a “guidebook” on how to do this life thing where you are struggling to just enter a classroom to sit alone without getting attention.

I really thought this was going to last forever but everything changed when I turned 20.

Oh my god what it feels like to finally be a woman. To create your own sense of self. To decide who you want to live as. To make little formative choices every day.

You finally put yourself out there so that life can find you. You see the world with your own eyes beyond certain institutions. Beyond your town. Beyond the limited perspective of your peers. You feel finally ready to loosen up a little and not walk on a tightrope where you can’t breathe.

You encounter the most priceless friendships where you feel safe enough to be yourself at the same time you are allowed to grow. You will get insanely inspired by the people around you because they are so gracious, empathetic and resilient in their own lives.

There will always be lessons, mistakes and betrayals in between to make sure you value every second of the magical part. You’ll have unbearably painful heartaches but the moment you decide to heal, the right people will come to lift you up.

“The highlight is never what you do together, but that you’re able to share something completely ordinary with someone who gets you.”

You’ll find purpose in giving because you are ready to trust someone and fall back freely. There will be countless moments of abundant joy, fulfilment and love that you can’t believe are real. Every place will have more excitement and meaning just because you are walking with better people now. There is no commitment or blood relation, but these souls will hold onto unsaid promises to be there for each other. No matter what the situation is, you will always know you are not alone. Somehow your shoulders will feel lighter with this feeling.

These magical creatures will keep you in their prayers in good or bad times. You’ll receive a cake ordered by your best friend who lives 255 km away. These stupidly funny humans will make friendship bracelets, go the extra mile to buy you fresh flowers, write letters like lovers, send you postcards from different cities. These unicorn special beings will remember exactly what flavour of brownie you like so that they can bake it for you on your birthday.

I mean it when I say, all they want in return is just you being yourself. You show up as you are is more than enough for them. Raw. Honest. Little wrecked. You’ll always receive warmth of love if you are surrounded by the right people.

Right now, if you are reading this and thinking this doesn’t exist. I want you to be your own best friend first. Because that’s how these gorgeous people show up. trust me:)

Happy friendship day, my very close friends <3

You are never alone.

I’m 23 and still not clear on what I am supposed to do with my life. I am in my Sylvia Plath era where I see so many possibilities, but I can’t choose one because I think I’ll miss out on other things. Like Taylor Swift said in your 20s you try to reach out for so many things but end up grasping nothing.

Every time I talk to anyone in their 20s, I always see their disturbed mind rushing towards the invisible finish line for the sake of it. Getting a job, finding a relationship or buying expensive gadgets, people run behind ticking impalpable boxes more than finding meaning and fulfilment. Like Ranbir Kapoor said in Tamasha (movie) about being so hardwired to just run in the race without questioning if it actually makes sense to you.

“Kise chahiye mann ka sona, aankh ke moti. Kise padi hai andar kya hai?”

English: “Who needs the gold in the mind, the pearl in the eye? Who has seen what’s inside?”

: Imatiaz Ali, Tamasha

I read recently that if you don’t know what to do right now, be the most healthy, confident and calm version of yourself so that magical things will come to you. And I genuinely think our personalities are exactly like a seed. The seed needs to spread and create a foundation underground which will not be a visible process, but it will prepare the tree to flourish in every season possible.

What you read in silence will show in how you speak in public. How you treat your thoughts and emotions will show in how you treat others. The way you conduct your brain will show in how you handle tough situations.

For all of this, you have to take a pause away from your routine. Because it’s really all about what you do in the time in between. When nobody is watching. When you are not performing. When you have a choice.

We have glamorized hustle culture so much that even on a day off we want to be “productive” and of course our definitions of productive includes more work and not rest. We don’t prioritize doing things that can actually recharge our soul and make us feel alive.

“You don’t have to have all the answers to live a meaningful life. You just have to keep showing up for yourself in small ways — the walks, the journaling, the little rituals that remind you who you are.”

So, I want us to pause for a while. Everyday. Just breathe and be on this magical planet. At least for 5 minutes. Don’t run behind a notification or a train or a goal. Calm that system down. Tell yourself you are doing more than enough.

One of my professors used to say if you are confused, stand there for some time and ask the universe to give you clarity (literally say it out loud). You’ll see signs to help you take meaningful steps rather than rushing for the sake of it.

The time in between is important. For clarity. For redirection. For meaning. Your life is not a timebomb which will go off if you don’t take decisions at a certain time. You are allowed to stop for a while. To think. To feel. To live.

I have always been one of the most joyful and creative individuals in every other room, but I lost that spark in three months. I met my friend in between and he said, “Don’t let adulthood get to you” to which I replied, “I don’t see any other way.” Because my surroundings were so shallow and purposeless.

Part of me was convinced this is what life is supposed to be. I dreamed and worked so hard for this job so now this is going to be my life for at least the next 30 years. Wake up at 6 am, travel 2 hours, sit in one chair and work for 9 hours, come home after 2 more traveling hours, have dinner, sleep and repeat. I kept doing it until I forgot the whole point of life itself.

My morning started with body pain and just one thought: how many more days for the weekend? In two hours of travelling, I had questions like “what if I actually die tomorrow?” or “what if I blink and I’m 30 doing the same thing?” or “what if I forget how to create and be excited about art?”

“Once you learn how to die, you learn how to live.” - Tuesdays with Morrie

My elder sister noticed all this for 3 months and asked me one day after work “are you tired?” I bawled my eyes out that night and she laughed at how seriously I was taking my life at 23. She told me how I stopped doing things that made me who I am. I stopped reading, going to the gym, traveling, painting, or even spending time with my cat. She cleared my lens to have a broader perspective on life.

The coming Friday was my last day in the office, and we left for Bangalore to explore on the same night. We spent four whole days to experience different food, places and incredible weather. To remember this phase I got my third tattoo of two birds flying on my collarbone.

After experiencing that deep fall mentally at the start of the year, I learned a couple of things:

• I want to live a life where if I’m asking myself, “what if I die tomorrow?” it shouldn’t scare me.

• If I can’t see life full of miracles, mind-blowing possibilities and infinite joy I need to change the surroundings as soon as possible.

• A day spent without shared laughter and passion is a day wasted.

• It’s okay to feel the emptiness so deeply in your bones that you know this is not how you want to spend the rest of your life & you quit.

“Don’t be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You don’t have to live forever; you just have to live.” : Natalie Babbitt, Tuck Everlasting

I was sitting in a train when I had this conversation with one of my wise colleagues where I asked her how she is always stress free even in the most exhausting situations possible. She said any breath that I take can be my last one and if the next second I meet God I want to be able to say “God, I was having a fun conversation with Sakshi. Let me finish it” and not say “Thank you, I hated this life anyway.”

AND THIS PERSPECTIVE.CHANGED.EVERYTHING.FOR.ME.

The way I chose to think, the people I surround myself with, the work that I spend my time doing matters. Because when I take my last breath, I really want to have a smile on my face and immense warmth of fulfilment in my heart. To have that I need to live each day with curiosity and not fear. With love and not insecurities. With purpose and not pressure.

For this I have to leave everything that makes me think like death is better and find other million things that make me feel blessed to experience this life.

So, this is your kind reminder that you have to create space for meaning and purpose in your life by removing every toxic and blood sucking environment. All of us deserve to live like we will be just fine if we die tomorrow because we lived a fulfilling life.

With time consciously or subconsciously pretending to be liked becomes your second nature and you never actually find your tribe. I’d like to name this as “Cool Disease” but some people also call it “People Pleasing”.

It prominently happened to me at 17. I had a hard time making meaningful friendships in school as a skinny, low-confident, anxious girl with a boy cut. Also because of the academic pressure I didn’t feel the need to belong that deeply.

But the moment I entered a crowded college with multifaceted teenagers hanging out with their respective group, the need for acceptance got hold of me. Somewhere we do think loners don’t have personalities and of course you are taken seriously when you have a bunch of people with you.

I’m not against friendships but I’ve seen people faking their personalities just to feel included in a group. I also know it gets suffocating when you can’t say the things you want to say, when you can’t be the way that feels natural, when you can’t relate to the conversations happening in the room.

No matter what you do you’ll NEVER feel at home when you are pretending to be some other “likeable” version of yourself. People pleasing is a toughest road which leads you to judgemental and hollow individuals who will never give you a fulfilling life. Because of social media, this urge to feel seen by a massive crowd has surged more than ever before.

I genuinely think you should be able to value meaning and adventure in your life more than your Instagram stories and social image. You’ll have 20 people to hang out with, but you’ll come home unhappy if you can’t be yourself with them. If clubbing, smoking and night outs doesn’t make you happy then hanging out with people who do that will NEVER make you content.

If your primary goal is to fit in and be admired by people, you’ll do things that will take you away from yourself and a meaningful life. All I want you to do is leave the damn rough road and take the one home which is filled with joy, passion and adventure.

Go out and find things that make you feel alive. Even if it’s just finding your favourite coffee shop or listening to a new artist who really speaks to you or wearing those damn shorts you love to the gym. Sit on the grass with your favourite book, dive in the middle of the ocean *with safety of course* and write imperfect poetry about love.

“Be authentically yourself so that people who are looking for you can find you”

I challenge you to find your own version of uncool. The version that ordinary people will have a hard time to understand but you will be having the most fun possible. You still might feel out of the place even after discovering all this, but at least you won’t suffocate this time because you have freedom to leave.

Wear pink glitter and give opinions about politics if that comes naturally to you. Read about historic fiction and neuroscience while being hopeless romantic. Be the first woman in your bloodline who has massive biceps and money of her own but also be sensible enough to sit when your mother is talking. Dance carefreely in public when they play your favourite song and make sure you jump like a child when you see your favourite artist.

Let life flow through you, my love.

Because you are being unfair to your life whenever you try to “fit in” and not discover one-of-a-kind facets of yourself. Completely change the path of being by changing your intentions. Try doing 1 thing a day to make you happy and at peace. Even if it’s just going for a 10 minute walk in nature or painting a small canvas.

Just do something for your soul. You absolutely deserve it.