Let’s kick off the Whatever She’s Doing interview series!

I’m endlessly inspired by the ambitious moms and women around me who are somehow doing it all and making it look effortless. Especially living and working in the Bay Area—the moms around me have BIG demanding careers, are hands-on moms, stay fit, look cute, travel, have clean houses, the list goes on. But I’m always wondering…HOW. What are the exact tips, tricks, tools that the rest of us can use?

Introducing Laurin, our first guest! We’ve known each other for about four years (I think? What year is it again?). We met while working at Benefit Cosmetics where she is Director of Global Marketing Campaigns (hello, cool job), and bonded over mom-ing, a mutual obsession with jumpsuits, and hot girl habits (we still trade links to Emma Grede and Lauryn Bosstick interviews). She’s an incredible human, so warm and kind, smart and a badass at work, and is always ready to share the products she’s using, parenting hacks that are working, and the different ways she’s prioritizing health and wellness.

I sat down to chat with Laurin (and by sat down I mean–I sat down and took notes, she walked up a hill with her dog while pushing a baby stroller. I told you: badass) about raising four kids (!), working remotely, creating routines that can survive chaos, and accepting that you can’t kill it at work and in motherhood every single day (which it turns out, is ok). Here, all the behind the scenes scoop on…

• Work & life schedule

• Morning & night routines

• Go-to breakfast, lunch, and dinners

• Health & fitness habits

• Ride-or-die products

• And more…

--

Give me the quick snapshot: What does your life look like right now?

Oh my goodness. It’s a circus.

I have four kids, and they’re all in completely different seasons of life. My oldest is almost nine. She’s my little mini-best-friend bookworm, and it’s so fun watching her grow into a young lady. She asks crazy questions and sometimes knows more than I do. It’s wild. She’s not quite in the preteen years yet, so we’re in this sweet spot.

Then it’s just mayhem with my four- and three-year-olds. They have these spitfire personalities and bounce off each other all day. They’re high-energy from morning until night. Being constantly overstimulated is both hilarious and exhausting.

And then I have an eight-month-old who was the chill little caboose of the family but is now really coming into her own. She’s no longer just a lump on the floor. Now she’s crawling toward the stairs like a moth to a light.

We’re also juggling a new home, a new city and time between California and Nebraska. The second we figure something out, our routine changes again. I’m such a Type A control freak, but people say that once you have four kids, you learn to give in to the chaos. I feel like I’m there. You just have to give up a lot of the control and go with the flow.

What feels especially good right now?

I’m so lucky that my husband is completely 50/50 in our parenting. By the fourth kid, you have this wisdom about not sweating the small stuff and getting over the humps together.

We know our areas, and it’s really nice being able to lean on each other when we’ve hit our quota. I’m the morning person, and he’s the night person. I’ll do breakfast, get everyone dressed and get them out the door. On nights when I’m tapped, he handles bath, books and bed. We’ve found this great sweet spot in parenting.

We both work fully remotely, which is a blessing but can also be a curse. My mom might pop over, the nanny is there and kids are coming in. It can be hard to create a real divide between work and home.

But we usually have a little time in the morning to work out, go for a walk or get a fancy coffee. I’m loving my mornings right now. The afternoons are a little crazier.

Walk me through a typical workday, from when you start until you’re actually done.

It’s meetings on meetings, so I block off time to actually tackle projects and have that heads-down time for myself.

I typically get online at 10 a.m. my time, which is 8 a.m. Pacific, so I have a little head start before everyone else is online. I’ll do some personal admin, like checking a school form or paying a bill, because otherwise it’s weighing on my to-do list for the rest of the day.

Then I look at my calendar, make my to-do list and start working. My calls usually begin around 11. They help me get into work mode and kick-start the day.

My husband and I also have an informal team brief every morning: What does your day look like? When are your calls? Who can handle pickup or volleyball drop-off? We have help with the kids, and my parents are super helpful with pickup, but I try to do it when I can. It’s a constant tag team.

It’s not consistent—yet!

How do you keep work from taking over your entire day?

At 4 p.m., I’m done. I need to be with my kids. So that means I need to work super efficiently during the day to make sure everything gets done.

I have all my work apps on my phone—Teams, email, meetings—so I can take calls or respond whenever I need to. Voice texting helps so much. Leveraging AI tools to collect and organize my notes has also been huge. Truly life-changing.

Blocking my calendar into chunks is really important. I protect time to get my own work done and then leave open time for meetings.

What time do you wake up, and what’s your morning routine?

Before my youngest was born, I was such a pro at waking up before the kids and being on the offense. I used to get up at 5:45 and go to an F45 class or take a walk.

Now I sleep until 6:30. I’m still giving myself a little time, but I often have my three-year-old early riser alongside me for company.

My husband and I fill a big glass bowl with ice water and dunk our faces in it every morning. Now the kids are starting to do it, too. It wakes you up, tightens your skin and helps calm your body down. It’s like brushing our teeth. We each do it twice for at least 20 seconds. The second time is always more shocking!

My morning routine is muscle memory at this point. It’s comforting because it’s one consistent thing I can count on.

What does breakfast look like in your house?

My two middle kids get a smoothie every morning. They love it. They beg for it!

Once every week or two, I prep the dry ingredients in mason jars: a scoop of chocolate protein powder (Be Well by Kelly or Clean Simple Eats), hemp seeds, flaxseed, peanut butter, a little salt and about a quarter cup of oatmeal. In the morning, I drop in a banana, add milk and blend it in the NutriBullet. Then I’m not worried about the crap they eat for the rest of the day.

I eat the same thing almost every morning: one egg, a scoop of cottage cheese and egg whites, all scrambled together. I love it with arugula and nutritional yeast on top. Sometimes I’ll add sourdough from the farmers market or berries if I’m really hungry.

I used to drink coffee and then not eat until much later. Now, I think it’s so important to hydrate and eat something before having coffee. I start with an electrolyte and creatine mixture (Re-Lyte or LMNT electrolytes, Thorne creatine), eat my eggs and then have my coffee. I delay caffeine now and don’t depend on it.

What does your nighttime routine look like?

Just like I want to be on the offense in the morning, I’m a big believer in giving myself some time at night. It’s not just for me; it’s also important for the kids to have a consistent bedtime. It’s a win-win.

I used to be crazy about getting everyone to sleep at exactly 7 p.m. They all used to go to bed at the same time. Now my oldest stays up a little later, and with so many kids in different stages, I’ve had to let go. It’s honestly felt kind of freeing.

My me-time is usually from about 7:30 to 9. I’m lights-out no later than 10.

What do you do at night to make the next morning easier?

I can’t go to bed with a dirty kitchen. I tidy the house, shut off the lights, clean the counters and get everything ready for the next day.

I also pack the kids’ lunches at night. I make the sandwiches and cut up the cucumbers and fruit. The rotation is quesadillas, PB&J, a bagel with cream cheese or a turkey sandwich. They almost always get a cucumber and whatever fruit is in season. In the morning, I just add the snacks and any last-minute extras.

Then I wash my face with Cocokind face wash. It’s so gentle. When I do more skincare steps, it creates more skin issues, so I keep it simple: face wash, an oil and face cream. Then I brush my teeth and use my Omnilux red-light mask (which I found for way less on Facebook Marketplace!).

Finally, I read on my Kindle. The Kindle was life-changing for me. I’m ride or die. Once in a while, I’ll watch a show with my husband, but I’m not good at watching TV by myself. It’s not my thing.

What does your week in workouts look like, and when do you fit them in?

If I don’t get my workout done in the morning, it looms over me all day. When I do it in the morning, my attitude is happier, the endorphins are pumping and I can check it off my list. There’s no excuse.

I went through a long stretch of doing F45 because it was only 45 minutes. Honestly, I would sometimes skip the last five minutes so I could get out of there in 35 or 40. As important as stretching is, I would leave early if I had to. I loved that there were no mirrors, so I wasn’t judging myself. It was different every day, and I didn’t have to think about it.

I recently shifted to Fit With Coco, which is a little more Pilates-focused. With a fourth kid, working out at home lets me shave off the commuting time. Forty-five minutes is the absolute maximum for me. Ideally, I work out four days a week, but at least three.

I also walk a ton. Walking is therapeutic for me, almost like meditation. It changes my attitude. I’m getting sunlight in my eyeballs, fresh air and nature. I can also bring someone on a scooter, a kid on a bike, two dogs and the stroller. I’m burning their energy, they’re outside and we’re all getting exercise together.

What’s your go-to weekday lunch?

I’m a big yogurt girlie because it’s easy. I’ll have Greek yogurt with Purely Elizabeth granola, Be Well by Kelly protein powder, blueberries and whatever other fruit I have.

What’s your go-to easy dinner?

There are a few meals in the rotation. One is Goodles with ground beef and a little tomato paste. It’s like a healthier Hamburger Helper. Sometimes I’ll put broccoli in there, too. It’s fast, but it still feels like comfort food.

There’s always taco night every Tuesday. We have to have avocados, and I love all the Siete products, especially the seasoning.

Another go-to is ground-chicken broccoli cheddar patties. The kids love them, and they’re great leftover. We’ll make homemade sweet potato fries or Jessie’s fries, which are so good.

We also do spaghetti and meatballs or Bolognese, and teriyaki chicken rice bowls. That’s basically our menu every single week!

What supplement or wellness habit has made a noticeable difference for you?

Creatine has been the biggest hack for me. I think my postpartum experience was so much better this time because of it. It gave me more energy on nights when I didn’t sleep, and I felt like the brain fog was truly lifted.

There’s a stigma that creatine is bulky and for men, but I take it more for my mind. Both my grandma and grandpa had Alzheimer’s, so brain health is something I think about a lot.

Of course, women should talk to their doctors about what’s appropriate for them, especially during pregnancy or postpartum.

What’s your go-to outfit?

A jumpsuit. It puts you together from head to toe, and it’s super comfy.

What’s your favorite app?

ChatGPT. From finding cool places to get ice cream, to figuring out baby sleep habits, to building an itinerary for a staycation, to helping me create a marketing brief—it touches all facets of my life.

I’m a very curious person and a researcher, and it has only helped with that. I don’t know how I lived without it. It’s my best little sidekick and has made life so much more manageable.

I finally upgraded to the paid version, and I can’t believe I waited so long. It’s so worth it.

What’s the best thing you’ve bought for under $100?

Jelly flats. They can elevate an outfit that doesn’t feel trendy and give you that feeling of freshness. There are other things in my closet that I’ve owned for 10 years, so I like adding one small, trendier piece.

What kitchen appliance can’t you live without?

My NutriBullet. I’ve had it for nine years! It’s so easy to clean.

I hate the Vitamix because it’s massive and so much to clean. I actually don’t have an air fryer, but I might need one.

What’s the last great book you read?

Into the Blue. So good! It’s a little longer, but it completely took me away.

What’s your current beauty obsession?

Benefit Precisely, My Brow Pencil. I realized the importance of a good brow when I started working at Benefit. Even if I don’t wear mascara, I need a good brow.

What would you happily outsource forever?

Putting sheets on beds. I hate it!

I’m also very happy to outsource cleaning the house. I’ll give up other luxuries, but I want a cleaning lady at least once a month. During the times when we haven’t had one, we’ve ended up stuck inside cleaning the house on a Saturday. That does not bring me joy.

What do you want to know about how other women make their lives work?

I want to know: how are people juggling their kids being in so many activities?

Right now, I only have one child who is old enough to be involved in a lot of activities. But when you have multiple kids going in different directions—how are moms doing it? If anyone knows, tell me!

What’s one thing every ambitious woman should know?

You’re never going to have balance.

Some days you’re a good mom, and some days you’re a good worker—but rarely are you both. The quicker you can come to terms with that and understand that the balance shakes out over time, the better.

There will be five days when you crush your job and then five days when you crush being a mom. You’re not going to do it all in one day.

I think it gets easier over time. When I had my first child, I was weeping because I felt like I never saw her and was missing all these things. Now that I have four, I’m more okay knowing that we’ll get quality time together on the weekends.

The balance isn’t in every single day. It’s in the long game.

–

Okay, I’m seriously influenced to get a Nutribullet (I have a Vitamix and do indeed hate cleaning it, wahh) and start making smoothies again. And also do the ice dunk. And read Into the Blue. So many good tips, thank you Laurin!

Connect with Laurin on LinkedIn–she’s the best!

Every person interviewed on Whatever She’s Doing is doing so out of the goodness of their heart and to support this Substack. Please make sure all comments are made with warmth and respect.

HOW AMBITIOUS WOMEN ACTUALLY MAKE IT WORK

We’ve all heard “you can’t have it all” or “you can have it all, but just not all at once.” Which I totally get. But as a longtime writer, I can’t ignore the negatives in those phrases: CAN’T and BUT. I prefer, “You can have everything that matters.” And that means deciding what doesn’t deserve your precious time and energy—and focusing on what does.

There are a LOT of things I care about and put effort into as a mom: quality time with my family, my career, my friendships, my health and fitness, and my hobbies (reading and Substack!). When it comes to my kids, I care deeply about raising kind and respectful people who try their best, move their bodies, pursue their interests, eat reasonably healthy foods and at least try new ones.

But if I’m going to care about allll those things, some others just can’t make the cut. So here are seven things I STOPPED caring about as a mom.

1. What my kids wear

I look at kids dressed in adorable, beautifully crafted little outfits and am just obsessed. But those clothes—neutrals, florals, soft cardigans, you know the look—are not what my kids want to wear. And unless we’re taking our professional holiday card photo, I’m over arguing with them about it.

Both of my girls are very particular about what they wear (especially my oldest—and from a very young age). They know their style: one wants a Zara faux-leather jacket and red sneakers; the other wants an exclusively Elsa wardrobe. Wearing what they like excites them and makes them feel confident, and I don’t want to take that away from them. So I buy the ugly backpacks, rainbow sequin headbands and neon sneakers, and call it a day.

2. Having a perfectly clean house

Let’s be clear: I LOVE a clean house. I want the kind of house that looks like no one lives in it. But realistically, as long as I have kids at home, that’s not going to happen. And if I don’t want to spend all day constantly picking up after my daughters (5 and 7) instead of playing with them, I need to let it slide.

My goal is a version of the 80/20 rule: A house that’s 80% clean is a win. To keep it at 80%, I have a housecleaner who comes once a month to do a deep clean, spend a few pockets of five to 10 minutes tidying up each day, run the dishwasher every night, and go on a bender organizing drawers or cabinets whenever I feel inspired (about once a month).

3. Being a fantastic cook

Would I like to be a fantastic cook and make amazing homemade meals every night? Yes! Obvi. But at this stage in life, with all the energy I’m pouring into other buckets, I’m not aiming for an A+—just a passing grade. (Remember those pass/fail classes in college? The best. So low pressure). I want a decently healthy meal on the table and for my family to sit and eat it together—most nights (not all).

Some nights will require chicken nuggets or breakfast for dinner. Lots of nights will include pasta. Some nights my kids will like whatever new food is on their plates; some nights they won’t. My goal is to show up consistently and make dinner “good enough.”

4. Keeping up with the Joneses

(Not to be 100 years old and use an expression from the 50s…? I think…?)

This can be a tough one. It’s hard not to compare your life—and your kids—to the people around you. (Hellooo, Instagram, which is partly why I’m barely on it anymore.) And comparing your life to the lives of those around you can take many forms.

In my life in San Francisco, it’s less about how big and beautiful someone’s house is or what designer clothes or bags they’re wearing at school pickup. It’s more about where they’re vacationing (Switzerland! Bali! Spain!) and all the activities their kids are doing (Russian Math! Competitive soccer! Advanced gymnastics!).

I have made a very conscious decision to take it in, acknowledge it and refocus on my own life. It reminds me of the quote, “I look to the left, I look to the right, and I stay in my lane.” I will plan the trips and activities that are best for our family, our finances, our kids’ interests and our schedule—and that’s that.

5. Goodie bags

I have never done goodie bags, and I never will. I already put a lot of mental energy into planning my kids’ birthday parties (Food! Drinks! Cake! Bouncy house rental!), and I personally do not want to think about everything going into the bags, the bags themselves and then having to pack them.

Most of the ones we get are full of sugar and plastic junk that gets forgotten about the next day. (Sorry for the brutal honesty—I could rant about goodie bags for a solid hour!) This is an easy one to cross off my mental list.

6. Saying yes to everything

I need downtime, and so do my kids. I used to overschedule our weekends to try to do everything and see everyone. Now, I’m much more intentional about protecting my time and energy.

If my kids want to go home and chill, we’ll skip the school hangout. If a Friday night event feels like too much after a long week, we’ll decline—even if we have nothing else officially going on. If an event requires two hours in the car, I’m probably not going. I’m not very spontaneous because sometimes spontaneity causes me more stress, and that’s OK. Saying no protects my time, sanity, and energy.

7. Pretending I’ve got it all together

At this stage in life, I don’t really care if people know that my youngest is a super-picky eater, that I’m stressed about a big life change, that my house doesn’t look picture-perfect, that I get overwhelmed sometimes, that I haven’t figured out all the forms to get my daughter into Girl Scouts, or that once in a while, I’ll have cereal for dinner on the couch—and it’s the best.

I’m not perfect. No one is. And I don’t want to fake it or be around others who do. The beauty of being real is that we can help each other through the messiness of life, and find the beauty in it.

Making it all work isn’t always about doing MORE, but about getting very clear on what doesn’t deserve your energy.

What have you stopped caring about so much? Tell me yours in the comments…I may include answers in a follow-up!

I love to read. I find reading to be this magical blend of relaxation, escape, and singular focus. It’s almost meditative. When you’re reading, you can’t be scrolling on your phone, watching TV, catching up on texts, or getting distracted by your never-ending to-do list. It unlocks new worlds, teaches me things, and I think makes me a more interesting person (flashback to last month in Napa, when after a few glasses of wine I went on a rant to my girlfriends about the Dust Bowl—read The Worst Hard Time and The Four Winds and you’ll see why).

BUT (why is there always a but?!!). With a demanding career and two kids, and wanting to make time to have a clean house, get dinner on the table, work out, see my friends, all the things…when and how exactly is this reading happening?

I’m breaking down the 10 habits and hacks for how I have gotten up to reading 50 books a year.

And a MASSIVE disclaimer…my kids are now 5 and 7 years old. I did NOT read as much when they were very young, I think I read about 4 books per year when I had babies. So if you’re at a different stage of life, please don’t feel any pressure that you “should” be reading a ton. This is only if you’re interested in leaning into reading and staying motivated, whatever that looks like for you. And, none of these resources or books have been sponsored (but if anyone wants to tap me for a sponsorship opportunity lmk, lol). Ok end of disclaimer.

Here we go.

1. Read before bed.

Once you start doing this, it becomes a really pleasant wind-down ritual. It can be for 10 minutes, it can be for an hour. Keeping a book next to your bed, and getting into bed earlier than normal—knowing you are earmarking time to read—protects this precious time and makes it part of your daily routine.

2. Watch less TV.

Let’s just get into the most unpopular method, shall we? No one probably wants to hear this, but the less TV I watch, the more I read. There is precious little time between when the kids go down and when I need to go down (as in, 1 hour), and I like to save a good chunk of that time for reading. So I phased out all the Housewives franchises; I let Heated Rivalry and Off Campus pass me by. And you know what? The world kept turning. I do still keep a few shows in the rotation (Summer House drama, anyone?) but typically don’t watch more than a few hours of TV per week.

3. Join a book club (formal or informal).

I’ve been in a book club for about 10 years, and although it’s changed people and forms, it’s always something I come back to. Having people to talk to about my books is FUN and having a “deadline” is honestly motivating. These days, I meet every month with two of my best friends, and we go to a bougie restaurant to discuss the month’s book. It’s kind of like a reading/gossip/supper club and I love it so much. I also have a few other friends who are big readers, and we started a WhatsApp group where we discuss books and share recommendations.

4. Track my books on Goodreads.

Ok this app is definitely not perfect, but it’s a great visual way to keep track of books you want to read, see what your friends are reading, and check off your own books when you’re done (SO satisfying). You can create an annual book goal and monitor your progress as you go–it kind of gamifies reading. Add me here!

5. Switch up my genres.

If I read the same genre over and over, I get bored and just fall off reading. So I rotate between contemporary fiction, historical fiction (my favorite), nonfiction, self-help, memoirs, and occasionally I’ll throw in a fantasy, sci-fi or romance. This keeps my reading journey varied and interesting, and gives me lots of content to talk about.

6. Stop reading books I’m not into.

It took me waaaay too long to become ok with this. I felt like it was a sign of failure, and that if I started a book and had already put a lot of time into it, I should just push through it. But honestly—reading should be enjoyable. Life is too short to force yourself to finish a book that’s just meh. So put it down and move on to the next. It’s ok.

7. Read on planes and at airports.

If I’m on an airplane, I’m reading a book (or sleeping). I don’t need to mess around with podcasts, or movies that always make me cry, and I definitely can’t focus on doing *actual* work. It’s a great way to just power through your book list. (Note: this only works when you aren’t traveling with your kids, or if your kids are old enough to occupy themselves with a screen or book).

8. Leverage my local library and the Libby app.

I prefer to borrow my books instead of buy them whenever possible (it just gets hard when you want to read THE hot trendy book that everyone else is also trying to get…cue me buying the hardcover copy of Yesteryear). I use my library app to put books on hold and then just go pick them up when they’re ready; I also put lots of books on hold via Libby, then whenever one is ready, I download it onto my Kindle. It’s easy, and it saves money.

9. Read while my kids watch movies.

On the weekends, if we’re at home, we usually have movie nights. We all chill on the couch, have an easy dinner (not above a frozen pizza), and veg out. But there are only so many times I can watch Aristocats, Kung Fu Panda 3 or It Takes Two (although the Olsen twins are still iconic). So while they watch, I read. I’m not on my phone, and I get some much-needed relaxation myself.

10. Listen to audiobooks (specifically memoirs).

I have friends who are obsessed with audiobooks and constantly have one in rotation (also available through Libby!). But my mind used to wander SO much…to the point where I’d miss whole chapters. So I gave up. UNTIL I started listening to memoirs. There usually aren’t tons of characters to keep track of or crazy plot twists. Often they’re read by the authors themselves which is super engaging. And the stories are WILD, which keeps me super dialed in. I’ll do about one audiobook per quarter, and listen while I’m driving, walking, or cleaning…passive multitasking at its finest.

Aaand bonus round! Here are some of my favorite books (not an exhaustive list because that’s too much pressure, but a decent representation).

FICTION (heavy/depressing)

• James

• Demon Copperhead

• American Dirt (I know the controversy about this book but still thought it was so important)

• Pachinko

• East of Eden

• Tomorrow, and Tomorrow, and Tomorrow

• The Four Winds (and The Women and most books by Kristin Hannah)

• Homegoing

FICTION (not heavy/depressing)

• The Correspondent (ok actually kind of sad but not a major downer and SO good)

• Daisy Jones and the Six (big fan of Taylor Jenkins Reid)

• Less

• The Wedding People

• Lessons in Chemistry

• Wellness

• The Blue Moon Cafe & 24-Hour Occult Emporium (shameless plug for my friend Lexie’s book that drops this week!)

NON-FICTION

• Ask Not: The Kennedys and the Women They Destroyed (I need to talk to somebody about this!!)

• Girl on Girl: How Pop Culture Turned A Generation of Women Against Themselves

• A Marriage at Sea: A True Story of Love, Obsession, and Shipwreck (INSANE story)

• The Worst Hard Time (ignited my Dust Bowl passion)

• The Wager: A Tale of Shipwreck, Mutiny and Murder

SELF-HELP

• What the Most Successful People Do Before Breakfast: And Two Other Short Guides to Achieving More at Work and at Home (very Whatever She’s Doing-coded)

• Atomic Habits: An Easy & Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones

MEMOIR

• Educated (MUST READ!)

• How to Murder Your Life

• From Here to the Great Unknown (Lisa Marie Presley’s memoir)

• In Order to Live: A North Korean Girl’s Journey to Freedom

Let me know your top must-reads and any tips on how you fit in reading time!

For a little background, I’m a beauty executive living in San Francisco with my husband (who also works) and two daughters, ages 5 and 7. While we do have money to spend, this city is expensive, kids are expensive (can we talk about camps? And swim lessons??), and unfortunately, not everything can make the cut. I spend on things that noticeably improve our lives and bring me joy, but less on things that just don’t deliver enough value.

So, let’s get into it.

6 THINGS I SPEND MONEY ON

1. My home

I believe where you live has a huge impact on your mental health. I’ve lived with bad roommates, I’ve lived in shitty basement apartments, I’ve had annoying condo neighbors—and let me tell you, itcuts you to your core every. single. day.

I live in one of the most expensive cities in the world, and a huge portion of our paychecks goes toward our home. But I love it. It’s big enough for the four of us to live comfortably (by city standards, lol), centrally located on a hill with beautiful views, and close to my family and work. It makes me happy every day. 100% worth it.

2. Travel and experiences

I love to travel and make memories with my family and friends. So if I’m invited on a girls’ trip to Japan, spring break with family friends to Mexico, wine tasting in Napa, or a nice dinner with my book club—I’m going to say yes. I pay to take my kids to museums, family camp, and long weekends in Sonoma or Santa Cruz. I paid to have an awesome 2000s-themed 40^th birthday party (with an open bar, hello) that I’ll always remember. As we used to say back then…YOLO.

3. My hair

Taking care of my hair makes me feel more confident, which is huge for my overall headspace. I wasn’t genetically gifted with amazing hair (wahh), and now I’m getting some grays, so yes, I’m going to spend money taking care of it.

I go to Shanna at Monarch Salon, who is sooo good at giving me the cut and color I want while keeping my hair healthy. I also have a Dyson Airwrap (with the large round brush attachment), a red light cap, and a collection of (mostly drugstore, thank god!) products from the Abbey Yung hair method (her method has literally changed my hair—please look her up).

4. Workout classes

I’ve been working out for 20 years, and I know myself. If I do a workout alone at home or in a gym, I’ll probably half-ass it and potentially not even do it. But I LIVE for the energy of workout classes—the music, the vibes, the instructor yelling at me, the other people sweating beside me and motivating me.

Right now, I’m spending $244 per month on a Solidcore membership (obsessed, it’s my entire personality), plus around $14 on the Peloton strength app. In the past, I’ve done ClassPass and had packages or memberships at Lagree studios, Barry’s, SoulCycle—you name it. For how working out makes me feel and look, it’s worth every penny.

5. A rental property

Last year my husband and I bought a condo in Palm Desert, furnished it, and turned it into a vacation home and rental property (find it on Airbnb if you want a taste of the desert life!). This wasn’t cheap, and we’ve cut spending in other areas to make it the best living space—and most profitable rental—it can be. It’s an investment and, hopefully, a place where we can spend a lot more time once we retire (which, manifesting that will be semi soon? maybe?).

6. Coffee from coffee shops

I’ve seen approximately 3,689 pieces of content saying that if you want to save money, just stop buying coffee and make it at home. I do make one cup every morning at home, but it also brings me incomparable joy to walk to coffee shop and have one made for me. Every day. I mean, it just tastes better, it gets me out of the house, and I get to vibe out at the coffee shop. My go-to is Philz but I also have a running list of cute places around the city (most recently, Hardware and Jaandi - both adorable).

I do this almost every day. Is it practical? No. Will I give it up? Also no.

6 THINGS I DON’T SPEND MONEY ON

1. Business-class flights

Listen, I LOVE a business-class flight, okay? When I’m flying for work and it can be expensed, there is truly nothing better. But there is no way in hell I’m going to spend $8,000 on a round-trip ticket to London or Paris or wherever. NO. WAY.

I will suffer in economy, get horrible sleep (despite my silk eye mask, earplugs, travel pillow, and travel foot stirrups), and power through on the other side. While it’s not great, it saves me thousands in just one day.

2. Designer clothes and expensive jewelry

I work in the beauty industry, where many other leaders are dripping in Dior and Louis Vuitton (honestly, it’s iconic and I’m here for it). And yes, I have a few designer bags (mostly from employee sample sales tbh), and I like to buy quality clothes. But this is an area I’m mindful of.

I mostly shop at places like J.Crew, Levi’s, Everlane (SOB that they were bought by Shein, kill), American Vintage, Gap, and occasionally stuff from Revolve. I keep my jewelry simple, and I wear the same black Beyond Yoga workout sets year after year.

While I’d love to splurge on a fancier closet, my other expenses (see above) are more important to me.

3. Private school for my kids (right now)

I’m a big believer in public school, AND it’s also very important to me that my kids get an excellent education. For elementary school, we were lucky enough to get into a top-rated Spanish immersion public school within walking distance of our house. It has a warm, active community and a diverse group of students from a variety of backgrounds. It’s not perfect, and the facilities could be nicer, and the classes could be smaller, but we’re very happy.

Private schools offer a lot. But for this exact moment in time, that crazy price tag isn’t worth it for our family.

4. Manicures

I spent many years getting gel manicures. But the time and money have become a huge hassle. It takes at least 90 minutes (which…with work and kids, when exactly am I doing this?), and you have to plan your life around your next appointment so your nails don’t look grown-out and chipped and gross, and yeah, you get it.

I’m into the bare-nail trend and have seen a lot of v stylish and successful women I know rock this look forever. If it’s good enough for them, it’s good enough for me.

5. Luxury makeup and skincare products (without performance to back them up)

I’ve worked in the beauty industry for 13 years, and I know what constitutes a *real* clinical claim, what’s marketing fluff, and when a product is actually worth the money.

I do TONS of research before purchasing something new. Often, I can get a product for $30 instead of $200 that works just as well, if not better.

I’ve also really simplified my makeup routine and spend a lot less impulsively than I used to. I know what I like, and what works for me.

6. Our car

We don’t drive anything super fancy (this coming from the land of Teslas). We have a Hyundai Tucson plug-in hybrid. It runs on electric for shorter distances (aka almost all the driving we do). We charge it in the garage and spend almost nothing on gas.

It’s big enough for our kids and all their crap, small enough to parallel park in tight spaces, and not so nice that we get upset when it gets dinged—which, living in the city, it inevitably does. We used to drive a Mercedes SUV, and honestly, like the Hyundai better. I don’t care about fancy cars, never have and never will, and this one is great for us.

Well, there you have it! What do you spend money on because it’s totally worth it to you? What do you skip? I want to know!