Dear Anna Mae,

My boss left me in charge of his [what?] so I have been busier than usual. Your letter came on schedule and was so warmly received as it was beautifully composed. You may write another like it at any time and drop it in a box addressed to me - the letter not the box.

I have done nothing but work since I saw you last. Planned to go to Morgantown next week end but can’t take that much time, so will probably be home a day or so. There is your moving - are you going to leave town?

If anything happens here I never know it. They say it rained once last week. The boss men are trying to get me to stay here another year but I don’t think I’m happy here although I’m never sure about that. It is a little too confining and I still want to go around the world. And I’m tired of being poor.

Please write soon and do be good. How is your school teacher and his new wife? Tell him I hope he will be very happy and that I may have to thank him yet. Bye now.

Buford

Well, of all the things that stood out here, the “I still want to go around the world” part gave me absolute chills. Because very soon, indeed, Buford will go around the world, as an Army doctor. The American Neutrality Act of 1937 has been amended this month, but only in financial terms, and mostly in order to assist Britain and France when it came time to may repayments (ah, America, thinking ahead but in terms of money. Imagine that). But it’s also already been enforced this month, so American ships are unable to sail in waters that have been defined as part of the war zone, rather like some sort of giant Risk game. To America at this point, I think that’s rather what the war is like. It’s “over there,” and all our moves are intellectually strategic, and not really grounded in the realities of war. What most Americans (or most people, even in Europe, for that matter) at this time do not know is that concentration camps have already been built, and have been operating since 1933.

I think that this letter is really indicative of its time and place. The news is slower, much slower, and in a little rural area, what could be more important than doing your work, seeing your family, and writing the people who care about you?

I do wonder, though, if the reference to Anna Mae’s writing is a reference to her letter, and maybe Buford isn’t as emotionally eloquent as she is. Gender roles were not just a bit different then, but more enforced, so maybe this is as close as he can come to saying what he really wants to say.

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae:

Am in great rush as usual. And realize perfectly well I should have written sooner, but it couldn’t be helped. Have been exceedingly busy and foresee no great amount of let-up in business for some time. Just at present am writing to be called to court to give testimony that nobody is sure of. Such is life. Don’t like courts anyhow.

Have no news of import except my stomach and I have both been upset since my return. But we are gradually getting on speaking terms with each other again. Funny about me and my stomach. We have to live together and both of us knows it, yet we continually mistreat each other. Strange paradox.

Please tell my folks I’m all right and will invite them soon. Write sooner and better than I did. My regards to all. Be good and take care of yourself -

As ever

Buford

First, a big oops, this was the letter directly after Anna Mae’s letter, but honestly, it’s not a big change in tone, so it hardly matters that I mixed them up. Haha In any case, it seems like Buford is still pretty busy!

What strikes me here is his description of his stomach ailment. As a doctor, and evidently one in demand, he no doubt knows exactly what is going on, and how to treat it. But he talks about it in a fun, joking, reassuring way, which tells me that he really knew how to talk to patients, and people, about medicine. Not every doctor has a great bedside manner, and he sure seems to have one. I would guess that, even though he was clearly an expert in medicine, his attitude and his way with people is why I grew up listening to people talk about what an amazing man Buford was.

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae:

I hope my folks gave you my apologies for not coming home last week. I was mighty sorry I couldn’t come but it just couldn’t be helped. I’m also late with my letter as usual, but life right now is pretty full. I hope you understand.

Mother will be here tomorrow and I think she plans to be back home Friday. She will probably be able to tell you when I’m coming home. Right now I don’t know.

If anything has happened here I’ve been too busy to notice it. I seldom get away from the hospital and sleep is something I used to get in the dim dark past.

Please don’t wait for me to answer your letters but write when you feel like it. I’m sorry I’m so busy, and must neglect many things. But I didn’t have sense enough not to study medicine. Write soon and be good

As ever

Buford

“As ever,” indeed! Nothing much different after Anna Mae’s letter, no “dearest” no “always.” Just busy Buford, doing his doctoring, and writing when he can. There’s not even any playfulness in this letter, which is unusual. Did he get Anna Mae’s letter and find it too strong and forward? Did she not send it, and so this is just normal correspondence?

Unless I find something to tell us otherwise, we’ll never know.

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae:

It is getting late but in order to keep a promise to myself and as a mark of appreciation for your letter before you got an answer I’m going to lose a few minutes of sleep. Life here goes on much the same design some happenings which may have changed it but didn’t. These happenings are better spoken of than written so I’ll save for a couple of weeks. I still hope to get home the weekend following this one, but cannot say definitely yet.

Lois left today, I guess. At any rate she was scheduled to leave. I told her about your boy friend and she threatened to pull your hair out. And I told her to pull some of his out for me at the same time. Maybe that will be a lesson to both of you.

I’m still teaching the [nuns??] - Medicine this time - and just Medicine! I don’t know but what I’m learning more than they are from the teaching, but at any rate it is fun and it keeps me awake. Seems like it is right long(?) to forget what you learn if you don’t keep up on it.

I’m not sure that I approve of your plans to leave in January - altho my approval probably doesn’t come under the head of essentials to your going. But at least we can console ourselves by saying that January is a good distance away and since tomorrow never comes, why worry?

Forest means to be settled in Morgantown until the last of January. Seems like he may be down to the W & L game and might not be a bad idea for you to come with him if he passes thru Hinton. You really should see one football game here, don’t you think? Will go into that later, also.

I’m going to be taking out tonsils and such things this next month, in addition to having a few babies, so it looks like hard times ahead. But you can stand anything they tell me, if you make your mind up, and mine is gradually being made up. I told you once how many problems work themselves if you let them alone, and now I’m a firm believer in the philosophy of “laissez faire” - or something.

Write to me real quick-like and maybe our letters won’t pass each other in the promise of getting to their destinations this time. Be good and bear of all men - especially school teachers -

As ever

Buford

PS- Have you moved? I want to know so I’ll be sure to put my blinds down!!!!

B

Okay, okay, who is Lois and what on earth is going on with the boyfriends and the hair pulling and such? I feel like some sort of courting games are being played here, but I’m no good at any of that anyway, and the “rules” certainly seem different in 1939.

I’m curious as to the happenings which are better spoken of than written. Is this related to the war? I’m actually thinking not. In about a year, the draft is going to be instituted, and it will be the first peace time draft in U.S. history, preparing for America’s entrance into the war. It’s still a ways off, so I’m not sure how much of these global events are impacting Charleston and Hinton quite yet.

He certainly wrote this next letter pretty quickly, tho. Interesting.

And why is Anna Mae always moving and going somewhere? This seems atypical for a young woman in the lat 30s, but I could definitely be wrong. It certainly seems like a more affluent lifestyle.

I also like his humor, and I’m curious what his mind is nearly made up about.

The next letter won’t reveal any of that. If I’m remembering correctly, the next letter is from Anna Mae, and wow, is it different. Did it ever get sent? There’s no envelope, so who knows! And yes, you guessed! It’s going behind the paywall. Trust me, you’ll want to read this one!

Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae,

I actually got away from the hospital at seven o’clock tonight, and I am glad for several reasons. Because I owe you a letter and the moon was just coming up. One of those great big round yellow moons that you like so well. And I looked at it, thought of you, and here I am.

I expected you all day Saturday. And then expected to see you at the game at least. I saw Laura Jo (?) and she said you didn’t come because of a supper or something. I’m sorry you weren’t here. First be-case I wanted to see you and second because you missed a good game.

I’ve been missing my Thursday night walks that I used to take when bothered a little by worries and sundry problems. I don’t have time to get them here and my worries are gradually mounting up. Seems like very confusing situations can arise when everything looks simple and [something]. I’ll write a book about that sometime.

My work has been a little heavier than usual lately. And the weather has been so darn nice that work is hard even if it only keeps you inside. I think this year and this time is about the prettiest I ever saw. Maybe I’m getting old and sentimental. Or just old.

I hope to come home in two or three weeks. I’ll try to let you know when I’m coming. But don’t be surprised if I come in unannounced because I never know just when I can get away.

Seems to me like it would be a good idea for you to do more shopping in Charleston pretty soon. And let me know just when so I can arrange to help you.

Please write sooner than I did, and maybe I’ll be less needed (?) for time from now on and I might answer your next letter in a month. At least I’ll try. Give my regards to everyone and think of me occasionally.

As ever,

Buford

ps—Have you moved yet? B

Earlier this month, on September 1, Germany invaded Poland. On September 3, Britain and France declared war on Germany. And I wonder if that’s what Buford is worrying about. It’s early, and news is slow (comparatively speaking), and at this point we time, I don’t think most Americans, even in major cities, knew how significant this was going to be, or what atrocities were occurring.

For the record, I am not a history expert, and while I love history, that does not make me an actual historian. I’m not going to post a date without checking it, and I’ll do my best verify information, but I’m speculating a fair amount, too. I have no real idea what the average American or West Virginian thought in September of 1939.

I don’t think, however, that it’s something a man would write about in a letter to a woman, particularly one he was possibly courting. After all, the 19th Amendment was ratified only 19 years prior, the year before Anna Mae was born. And, honestly, this is something that we still struggle with today.

It’s hilarious that he calls himself “old.” Pahahaha!

But I read this as a sweet, although slightly ominous letter, because the world is going to crash in, no matter how much they might want to focus on their small section of the world. I like that they do. I like how they know everyone and talk about them and go out and socialize (or treat patients) and how their immediate surroundings take up so much of their concern. Globalization is just starting to happen, but for them, it’s still on the other side of the world.

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae:

Most always I keep my promises. Sorry you had to mind the baby Saturday morning in-stead of going with me, but I don’t blew you a bit. She is much cuter than I. And coming from me that is quite a compliment, don’t you think?

We had a nice trip to Roanoke. Got back last night about one o’clock and I left this morning at 7:30 so had no chance ever to call you up. However maybe next time you won’t have to mind the baby and we can see each other more. It’s a terrible thing to have a baby beat your time.

[Something] here is about the same. Only I am a little more tired than before, which is explain-able, and I think understandable. When did you say you were going to Washington, and when are you coming here?

I don't know when I’ll be home again. The folks planned a week at Craig Healing(?) around the 19th and I’m gong to try to go there for a weekend. But doubt that I’ll be in Hinton for some time.

My regards to your myriads of boy-friends, and tell them that I don’t blame them a bit. But I’m afraid some of them might get a spanking when I come home. Be a good little girl, and gain about seven more pounds by the time I see you again. Write to me soon, and I’ll try to answer more promptly this time —

As ever

Booch(?)

And Dr. McNeer has entered the building with his lovely new stationary! When did graduation happen? How was it? Did Anna Mae attend? These questions are mysteries. But it’s a pretty humble person who just switches to his professional stationary and never mentions his new job, his graduation, the end of medical school, etc. At least, that’s how it seems to me. Perhaps his diminutive sign off (did she call him “Booch?”) shows a little self-consciousness at the formality of his stationary, too.

I think the baby in question might be my aunt Mary Ellen. I’m not certain she’d love this portrayal of herself as an unnamed child to be minded when people had other things they’d rather be doing. Ha! Although I suppose this could be one of the reasons she adored Anna Mae so much. Why was Anna Mae stuck minding the baby? Did Gigi go to Roanoke with everyone else? So many things we’ll never know.

These trips to Roanoke, and surrounding areas, btw, continued to occur when everyone was much older. Everyone seemed to love (and sometimes hate!) going out to the surrounding areas.

I would assume Anna Mae would be going to Washington to visit my grandmother, Ruth, and the baby. They lived in DC (my dad grew up in Falls Church).

I had to look up Craig Healing, which is evidently a resort with hot springs that were valued for their healing properties (hence the name, I suppose). It’s now a Christian Church conference center.

And what is up with the boyfriends? Is Anna Mae baiting him? Does she have multiple boyfriends? Both? And he’s going to SPANK THEM?? I am not a fan of “be a good little girl” but the entreaty to gain seven pounds is both very specific and lovely. Although this tune will evidently change, it’s nice to see a male doctor encouraging a woman to gain weight.

I wonder what he would think of Ozempic.

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae:

I was sorry to learn that you have been indisposed and trust that by now you are infinitely better. Your loneliness is to me entirely incomprehensible for several reasons. Predominantly perhaps because loneliness and toothache are two illnesses to which I have never been exposed and secondly because you are undoubted-ly the last person in the world I would have expected of being lonesome. As for your other indisposition I will not be able to prescribe until I know of its nature.

It has been so hot here up until yesterday that studying has been well nigh impossible. Since yester- day it has been cool and I have studied some. I am tired of studying however and just about finished for a spell. Exams by the State Board begin Wednesday at 9 am and Friday at 6 pm. I expect to come home Friday night but may not leave until Saturday.

Forest seems quite happy but doesn’t like the heat. He retains all of his admiration for you. I say retains it because he never gives any of it was vocally. However I still think you mistake his opinion of you.

Billie(?) is in Buffalo. Julia Elizabeth is here but as usual we are both busy. We did go to North Carolina Friday night to see her grandmother. They have a beautiful farm. But no hills at all. So I think I’ll come back to West Va.

No further news comes to my addled head so I’ll stop for now. I’ll see you later this week.

As ever,

Buford

Is it just me, or does that beginning seem a little, I don’t know, not very sympathetic? I, too, enjoy formal sentence structure, but not necessarily when I’m offering comfort. I do VERY MUCH like the line about “loneliness and toothache,” though. I get the feeling that Buford wouldn’t have done too badly if he had taken up becoming a writer with all of his pen and pencil gift sets.

No congratulations or records of congratulations from him, incidentally. Interesting. But his exams are coming up, and his own graduation is imminent.

Forest, for those of you who don’t know, is Buford’s brother. (Right?) I love the dry wit here, but I wonder about that relationship. Why does Anna Mae think Forest doesn’t like her?

Who is Billie! And Julia Elizabeth! We have a name of a possible girlfriend (two??), and I’d like to point out that it’s another first name, middle name. My mother was a first name middle name (Betty Hart), and while this is a fairly common rural Southern tradition, you usually see it in three syllables, not seven!

These letters are starting to make me feel like Anna Mae is the one crushing on Buford, and trying to get his attention. I think she’s hinting at being lonely for him, and he’s not getting it. Now I could ABSOLUTELY be reading into that, and it’s particularly hard without her letters to look at, but I’m just feeling that’s the vibe. Remember, they’re going to get married in 1942, in February, which isn’t that far in the future.

Take that, Julia Elizabeth.

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Well, it looks like Joe Hinerman is mentioned again, but in what context, it’s not entirely certain. Are they back together?

I like how his roommate gave him a pen and pencil set for graduation. I didn’t give my roommate anything for graduation. Ha! I particularly love that it’s a pen and pencil set, which is a lovely gift under any circumstance, in my opinion.

Now, the joke. I don’t get it. I’m not impressed with a joke where two Black men are made to look like fools, but I’m not entirely certain this isn’t an Amos N’ Andy episode/skit/reference. Which, that’s a whole kettle of fish right there. I AM impressed that about a year after his use of the n-word, Buford is already using the correct and acceptable term for Black people, which, in the 1930s (and for a couple more decades after that, I believe) is Negro. So, we’re already seeing a little of that process that will eventually lead him to become an anti-racist activist in the NAACP.

Of note to me is that he calls the giver of the watch “boss,” which, all things considered, in a pretty neutral term that seems to mask the inequalities of the era. Sure, a boss could have given a Black man a grand watch in 1939, but it’s a little more likely that the power dynamic between the two was a little more imbalanced (especially since it’s hard not to read that boss as a white man, given the context of the present and the time period). It’s hard to know, from my 2026 vantage point, if he’s trying to downplay the inequalities, something I think white people often do, especially when we start becoming anti-racist, because we focus on commonalities. (We are all so much alike! We’re all human beings! Yes, true. But we don’t all have the same experiences or treatment or access, either.) But is he trying to be sensitive and use the word “boss” instead of something like “master,” that harkens directly to slavery? Which is another thing white people do sometimes: downplaying or ignoring how horrible slavery was as if that will lessen its impact somehow. It’s a bit of a Southern thing to do as well, mentioning something in a sideways or diminishing fashion to reduce its “ugliness.” (Yes, I really have heard people call the Civil War “the recent troubles” before). Or maybe he’s trying to protect Anna Mae, since she is so “sweet,” by using more neutral language?

I’m not sure I have any answers, but it’s a curious moment for me here.

Of additional note is that Anna Mae is now a high school graduate, and it seems that Buford is graduating as well. One full year of medical school, evidently, and he’s done. That’s something else.

I wonder where his graduation invitation is.

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I’m not sure where there was such a gap in letters, but the next envelope in the box for 1939 is Anna Mae’s high school graduation invitation! There are a few pieces of ephemera like this that have been collected in the letter boxes. And I’m pretty certain I have more floating about, because my family loved to save little pieces of paper. Newspaper clippings (occasionally the entire newspaper), cards, announcements, obituaries, I have a plethora of these things in various places.

What I particular like about this is that the little card with the little tissue paper on it is intact. I never really knew the purpose of these additional little cards with just your name on them. But I had them for my high school graduation as well. I’m not sure where there were two in this envelope. I’m guessing both styles might have been ordered, but the script was the one that was mailed out.

I also like that it’s so old that the glue from the envelope has discolored the invitation!

And imagine a high school graduation at 8pm! A formal night of pomp and circumstance.

A typewritten letter, so I’m not going to type it all again, even though it runs off the page a bit.

It seems that Anna Mae was dating Joe after all (Hinneman? The football guy? I suppose so, but it’s never conclusively stated here) and that’s that. I’m not certain that “stop worrying yourself about trifles” is the most compassionate ending, but maybe Buford is secretly rejoicing about this break up. After all, he did somehow embarrass Joe, and maybe that was on purpose? WE MAY NEVER KNOW.

I’m glad to see that the abbreviation of “through” as “thru” is still popular today, but this talk of the Civil War is quite entertaining. Here in the South, the Civil War has been taken quite seriously for, well, ever since the Daughters of the Confederacy hyped it all up and made it into a great tragic loss (which, to be clear, most of the South already thought anyway). Of particular note is Buford’s claim to have no-dog in this fight, but still calling the Detroit man a “self-styled” Yankee. I love that, because you can be for the South, without being for the Confederacy, and that’s very much the vibe I’m getting here.

(If you want to read more about the South’s, especially Virginia’s, relationship to the Civil War, it’s romanticization of the Civil War, and how truly strange it is that a bunch of lazy sadistic losers who couldn’t be bothered to till their own farms but had to steal and beat people to do it for them became romantic heroes, I highly recommend this book: Robert E. Lee and Me by Ty Seidule, Professor Emeritus at West Point.)

I also note the Buford mentions baseball here, but not the mysterious someone whose arms he spends time in. Perhaps that is also no more?

We shall see!

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae,

I am truly sorry that I am late with my usual more or less prompt reply to your ever-so-sweet letter, but I have been fairly busy and usually spend what little spare time I have in the arms of Morpheus - or somebody else. But I have my oral examination in Surgery tomorrow and after that I’ll have more time to play than I’ve had for nearly four months, so I promise not to be late in answering again. Please forgive me this time.

You sound like you need advise, which is one thing I got plenty of. However, I cannot give it until I know the score and from your letter, I don’t know the score yet. So you must be a little more explicit or let the matter rest until Easter. Be all of this as it may, it seems to me that you know me about well enough to know what my answer would be to any specific problem you have.

I’m sorry Joe was embarrassed in coming in that night. Maybe I didn’t help much to relieve him of his embarrassment. If I did hurt his feelings in any way I am sorry because I really do like and admire him.

Nothing happens here but work. I haven’t been out socially for over a week and this is getting a bit tiresome. But better days lie ahead.

I’m glad you are learning some Chemistry. Maybe you will fool everybody - including yourself- and pass that course. I hope you do. I know you can.

Please don’t delay in writing. I really will answer sooner next time. My regards to everybody, and be good —

As ever

Buford

Okay. WHAT?? I know I said this last time, but “somebody else’s arms?” I feel like we’ve taken a tonal shift here (to say the least). But also, not entirely, because there’s definitely something going on. What on earth happened at Christmas? And happened to make Joe feel embarrassed??

I was honestly expecting these earlier letters to just be setting some framework before getting into the WWII letters, but this is such drama, and I’m so invested, and I want all the tea!

I’m not sure where my grandmother is right now. I just checked the records I have, and she married Bob in 1937, so and her first kid, my aunt Mary Ellen (hoo boy) was born in 1939. So she’s probably pregnant, and I would guess she’s writing letters to Anna Mae, because they all loved to write letters. Right now, I want to see THOSE letters. And also Anna Mae’s letters to Buford. It’s strange to have nine boxes of letters and wish I had more. Ha!

I’m also rather entertained by the idea of Anna Mae learning chemistry, which I can’t imagine that she enjoyed. But she was pretty eclectic in many ways, so you never know.

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Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae,

I planned to write earlier this evening but a patient came into the emergency room all a dither and it took several of us to cool him off and get him to bed.

I have done little but work since I got back. Did manage to get out to see the preacher’s daughter last night. The nurse and I can never get off duty the same night so we are having an awful time. However I get some rest after two more seeks and maybe then it won’t be so bad.

I want to thank you and Joe for coming in to say goodbye. I appreciated it a lot. It was sweet of you. I hope you and Joe are seeing each other frequently. I guess I am getting old - here I am match-making. However, he is a fine boy and you know what I think of you already, or do you?

If the weather in Hinton is as warm as it here it is not all condusive to study. All I want to do is eat, sleep, and play. All I get to do is eat, work, and sleep a little - Such is life.

Please write to me soon. I am sorry I was late in writing you but I warned you that there would be busy days for me. I don’t mean maybe.

My regards to your family. Be good and sweet. I am looking for a letter already, so don’t disappoint me.

As ever,

Buford

Okay, WHAT?? Match-making? I thought Buford was courting Anna Mae, but is he not courting her yet? Are these “friendly” letters? And who is this Joe fella? I’m guessing this is Joe Hinneman, the football player that Buford coached at some point. And who is this preacher’s daughter? Was that strictly a social call, or a date? I have so many questions!

This is certainly strange to read after all the talk of "Two Sleepy People.”

I’m not sure if this is all tongue in cheek or if we are in more preliminary stages that I thought! Ruth (my grandmother) is with Bob at this point, so we know she and Buford broke up. I wish we had some of Anna Mae’s letters or knew what happened at Christmas to bring this all on.

As for the emergency room, people in a dither coming into the ER happens more than you think. I worked in a hospital laboratory for a spell (and my mom was a hospital lab director), and there were many nights when someone was brought into the ER because they had consumed too much (insert substance here) and needed to be put to bed. Or because they’d gotten into a fight. Fun fact, the slowest day in the hospital is Super Bowl Sunday, and nearly everything that comes into the ER is people who got into fights or drunk people. So Buford’s story resonated with me, and reminded me of some of those late night hospital shift stories.

Some things never really change.

While I’ve been posting letters, I haven’t posted any of the envelopes, so I wanted to do a quick post showcasing them. It cost three cents to mail a letter. The postmarks have the exact time (instead of just AM or PM). And the cancellation marks tend to be wavy lines, but theirs one specialized one for the Red Cross. These postmarks and cancellation marks were likely machine applied, probably by a Barnard (I went on a bit of a dive).

What I particularly like is the addressing conventions. No ZIP code (which was introduced on July 1, 1963, partly due to the increase in letter writing after WWII. It was actually proposed in 1944). And I know that Anna Mae moved, but I don’t think she moved that many times! 520, 510, and 516. And one without a house number at all! Hinton isn’t a terribly big town now (understatement), and I would imagine that in 1938, it was also not large. My maternal grandmother and great-grandfather were postmistress and postmaster of a small town in Virginia, called Wake. (I have my grandmother’s postal hand stamp.) They also had a general store. And they just knew everyone. I would guess that Hinton was much the same.

Also of note, is the West Va., instead of WV. The two-letter abbreviation of states wasn’t standardized and introduced until October 1, 1963 (see the ZIP code link). And what I find interesting about that, and the ZIP codes, is that even though the systems were proposed with the increase of letters during and following WWII, it took nearly 20 years to get the systems operating.

Seems about right.

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This is the last letter from 1938, and as I picked it up to pull the letter out, I realized that it had never been opened. I’m going to do a post about the envelopes next, and addressing, so you’ll see that all of those envelopes were clearly opened with a letter opener, smooth rips across until the very end, where it’s jagged. (And that’s another interesting point for me, because we hardly ever use letter openers now. I have one. Do I use it? Nope.)

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A typewritten letter! This is pretty straightforward, and I have no idea where he found a typewriter. I’m curious about the part where he says that he quit drinking. Was this a temporary decision, or a permanent one? For those of you who didn’t know Mike, he was an excellent psychiatrist who specialized in addiction and substance and abuse. He was also an alcoholic. He quit drinking in the late 80s, I believe.

I enjoy seeing Buford’s humor here, about the babies being well and the fathers being drunk. Even his observation about people not writing him when he doesn’t write them is that same dry humor that I knew in Mike.

In the past few letters, he’s referenced football and Joe Hinerman, and now that makes a bit more sense. He coached Joe! Is this more dry humor? He seems legitimately invested in Joe, and now all of his inquiries seem more than an interest in local football, but an interest in a friend and possible coachee.

I’m not sure how I feel about “child” in this context, but I’m pretty sure it’s supposed to be playful. My 2026 raging feminist self, however, is rolling her eyes.

The length of time between letters does indicate the med school is keeping Buford very busy indeed, however. The next one is a quick note, a couple weeks later. I can absolutely see Anna Mae being rather annoyed that he isn’t writing her more often as well.

Transcription (by me):

Dear Anna Mae:

A mere note to let you know I’ll be home Thanksgiving. If anything occurs I can’t come I’ll call Dad and he will probably let you know if you call him.

Your picture is mighty pretty on my dresser. Thank you. I am really very busy so I’ll stop now - hoping to see you soon -

Buford

After reading this, I went on a bit of a dive (I’ll show you the situation), and I have found this picture of Anna Mae. It is not dated, but it would probably be around this time. I also have two photos of Anna Mae and my grandmother Gigi (her name is actually Ruth) with a neighbor’s dog from 1935. Ruth is holding the dog.

Anna Mae, undated, but probably around this time.

Ruth (my grandmother) holding the dog (Tippy) and Anna Mae, in 1935. I think the woman who came out onto the porch is their mother. I particularly like the reluctance to participate in this photography session in the first picture.

Here is my situation. I have 9285741947297624258479574 photos. Some in albums, some not. Sort labeled, some not. Some in frames, some not. Both sides of my family LOVED getting portraits done, and taking photos. I even have tintypes and old reel-to-reel video. It is a blessing and curse.

And it is also evidently genetic, because I, too, take 42954329857948 photos nearly every day. My iPhone is currently out of storage because of my embarrassingly large photo library.

But I’ll post what I find, and I suppose I’ll need to find some photos of Buford next!

Speaking of next, the next post is going to be the first paywalled post, because it’s a letter that was never opened. Spoiler alert: I opened it.

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In the first, my cousin Mike was a child, but big for his age (and he was. I have photos!). A patient came into the office to tell Buford that Mike was playing in a park with some Black children. His response was that he hoped Mike didn’t accidentally hurt the children due to his larger size. Which honestly sounds a bit like Mr. Rogers to me. Love it.

The second piece of information that I learned was that Buford later advocated for the integration of the local country club, which was called Willowwood. He wanted everyone to be able to play golf. This is a pretty big deal if you know anything about golf and country clubs.

And the third, and maybe coolest, piece of information that I learned, is that Buford later served in a leadership capacity in the local NAACP chapter, probably in the late 60s or early 70s.

So what are we to make of his language in the last letter? The more I’ve talked to folks and the more I think about it, the more I question what was happening in medical school at this point in time, particularly in regards to how Black patients were treated, and what sort of access they had to medical care. I could see the n-word being something that other medical students, and even teachers and professors, said on a casual and regular basis. Racism, as we know, is insidious and institutionalized. It’s taught and embedded. And it’s very rampant, and remains so.

But questioning those ideas, and changing, and putting that change into action, is an act of anti-racism. It’s work we should all be doing. And it appears that at some point, Buford did that work, and questioned the institution (by which I mean society and culture, but also probably his actual school) that he learned from.

And I don’t want to celebrate this, because treating all people as human beings, and fighting for others’ rights and access, is work that should be considered basic and fundamental to being human and being a functioning member of society. But it’s hard also not to laud change, because change is hard. And taking it to the point where you serve in a leadership capacity for a local NAACP chapter is no small thing.

It’s also important to remember that these letters are each one point in time. No one letter is going to paint us a complete picture. So I should save my conclusions until the end of this letter journey (but, spoiler alert, I won’t. Ha!). Anecdotes and stories help paint a bigger picture, however. And I have LOVED hearing the stories and comments that have come up from these first few letters, so please, keep sharing! Thank you to everyone who has reached out so far!! If there’s ever anything you don’t want me to share on here, I’ll keep it between us (or the paywall!).

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Transcription (by me, and I haven’t proofread it):

Dear Anna Mae,

I’m sorry Stuart has to work at such hours, but having been at work myself since 4:30 am today and having the end not yet in sight at 9:00 pm I am reserving most of my sympathy for myself. I was hap-py to hear that you and your blood pressure are perking up. You used “sat” correctly but you don’t say “can’t lay in bed” - it is can’t lie in bed.

The afternoon was beautiful here Sunday too, but I can’t swear as to the morn[?] because I had to work Sunday night. Working is I am afraid interfering with my education, but I have been rather well education in moonology [that can’t be right] in times past and probably am no in more need of practical experience this fall. But it isn’t a bad idea.

I have to really go to work next Tuesday. On obstetrics service - chasing around and finding little [ABSOLUTELY NOT are you fucking serious] babies. And after that two months of surgery which will keep me very busy. And then maybe I can begin to catch up on my lost sleep.

Forest wrote that you seemed to be sorry that he wasn’t me or something. I got lost in the maze of words he threw at me so I don’t know just what he meant. He seemed to think you look better - I mean as if you felt better.

over

I’m glad you have moved. It is quite a job but well worth the trouble. Especially when you get such a nice front porch.

Of course I want one of your Senior pictures - good, bad, or indifferent. So you must send one with no further ado. In fact I am already waiting for it.

You said to write very, very soon, but this is the best I could do this time. I really have to sleep more and I’ve been busier than usual this week. So maybe I’ll do better next time.

Be good, and keep getting some more meat on your bones. Write to me as soon as you can

As ever

Buford

******

I wasn’t expecting the n-bomb. But it has got me thinking about what medical school and practice looked like in the late 30s in Richmond, VA. I’m thinking very specifically of Henrietta Lacks here. Did white medical students regularly “practice” on Black patients? I would assume so. I would assume that this was before clinical rotations, and it seems like he began working while still a student. And I would assume also, based on this time period, that his services were cheaper (if not free) as a student, and that Black patients did not have access to better quality care. Remember, Buford JUST entered medical school. He hasn’t even been there a month. And this is who is providing their care??

This is clearly something to research.

But it also brings up a different question for me. What do white people do when they have forebears who were clearly racist? As someone who has some ancestors in the Daughters of the Confederacy, and also some who owned slaves, what do I do when I find those records? For me, I do my best to never downplay the terror and atrocities of American chattel slavery. I never hedge or make excuses. I think it’s important to show things for what they were, and my ancestors were complicit in creating a systemic system of oppression that is so ingrained that it still exists today.

I’m pretty riled up and disappointed about the n-word here, so I’m not sure what else to say at the moment. I have no idea what “moonology” is, and I’m pretty sure I’ve got that wrong. I’m also not wild about the grammar correcting, but it’s possible he’s doing it because Anna Mae is a senior in high school here, while he’s courting her from medical school.

Let’s hope Buford gets even more education, specifically about racism and equality, as we continue to read these letters.

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It’s a bit of a back-handed compliment, I think, to tell a woman not to waste any time about thinking about what she writes before she writes it, and just send a piece of her self. As if what she thinks about isn’t as important as her “nature.” But the “cause I kinda sorta miss you too” is sweet. And, the most interesting thing to me, here, is that this implies that Anna Mae told him that she missed him first. Which seems pretty forward for a woman in 1938 (and perfectly in keeping with the Anna Mae I knew).

I’m at a loss as to why introspection could be bad for young men. Perhaps I’m reading that wrong, or, and this is more likely, the things young men think about during their introspection is something best avoided. Ah, euphemisms. But, taking introspection literally, I think we could all do with a little more of it, particularly young men. But I’m reading this letter 88 years after it was written, and as a reader in 2026, I’m sure I’m reading it differently than it was intended (as we’re about to see in a minute).

I like how he asks about the football team and comments on the player that he likes (although I’m not sure about calling him a “boy,” and I hope this player is white). But I nearly fell off the sofa when Buford asks Anna Mae how much she weighs. What in the actual fuck is that about? The follow up about the preacher telling him about her church attendance is also, to my mind, creepy AF. But the chattiness about other people reminds me that this is a small town, and they’re all writing letters to one another, and probably all talking about each other, too. So this is likely nothing too remarkable.

“Be good,” a phrase I can never hear in any voice other than E.T.’s (sorry, Buford), is followed with “put on some weight,” which delighted me. I couldn’t imagine a man saying that to a woman today. I’m not psyched about the focus on her weight at all, but this, at least, seems to stem from a concern for her health, encouraging her to eat, which is in direct contradiction to most advice given to women (of any time period).

I admittedly snorted a bit at “best regards to your family,” wondering if he meant my grandmother as well, now that I know that he was seeing her before he began seeing Anna Mae. Ha!

And “green-eyed,” is cute, but in that “we like stalkers if they’re hot” kind of way. I would bet that Anna Mae preened at the idea of making a man jealous. She always did like attention.

I’m excited for the next letter, and I might try to post these ones from 1938 a little closer together. And honestly, I hadn’t done the math until this post, and I’m a bit wowed by the fact that these letters are 88 years old!

Do you like the commentary first, and then the letter? Or would vice versa be better? Do tell!

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As I began sorting through the first box of letters, I found a few from 1938, including what appears to be the very first letter that my great-uncle Buford sent my great-aunt Anna Mae.

There are things I don’t know, and that I don’t know if I’ll ever know now. I don’t know how they met. Or when they met. Buford died when I was very young, maybe three or four years old. Anna Mae died in 2019, when she was 98. Their only son, my cousin Mike, died in 2022. There’s not many people now I could ask.

I do know, however, that the Men’s Dormitory at the Medical College of VA is now the Gateway Building of the VCU Health Center. When my mom was living, her doctors were all at VCU, so she went there often for medical appointments, and more than a few hospitalizations. I usually walked through the Gateway building to visit her, or take her where she needed to go. It’s funny to see that it once was the men’s dorms, and that my great-uncle lived there when he went to medical school. Small world.

What I love about this letter is the first line, the excuse to write, it’s almost a wink. The observational style is not unlike my cousin Mike, and in fact, I could hear Mike say something about people going nowhere in particular but being in a great hurry to get there. The same with the food deserving no particular emphasis.

Bobby Stork(?) must be a mutual friend, but the description of his forlorn mornings is poignant and vivid.

Some words I can’t make out. Are there mimes around that don’t look very safe? Mares? What does this mean?

I like that he mentions Hinton, and football, and I had no idea that my great-aunt Anna Mae had ever broken her arm! How did she break it? What was she doing? I would love to know that answers to this, especially as she never did anything particularly physical or athletic, and seemed very keen on “proper.”

From what I have skimmed through, this is the only letter he signs “Boosh,” and I have no idea why.

Mysteries, from the start.

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