The other day, I was lying in bed scrolling through Tiktok when I came across a Spider-Man edit to Olivia Rodrigo’s song, “Purple.”

The editor had paired the lyric – “I had big dreams till I tied myself to you” – with a clip of Peter staring at his Spider-Man suit.

And now when I think about it, the lyrics do resemble him a lot.

Peter Parker was once a fifteen-year-old science whiz who built Lego Death Stars with his best friend and dreamed of going to MIT with the girl he loved.

But at the same time, he’s also the guy who fought a giant purple alien in space. Who got blipped and lost five years of his life. Who watched his mentor die. Who got betrayed by someone he trusted. And who held his aunt as she bled out in his arms.

All because, every time, he tried to do the right thing.

And at some point, he got tired of it.

He no longer wanted to carry Spider-Man’s duty to the world - because every time he did, it seemed to cost him another piece of Peter Parker’s life.

“With great power comes great responsibility.”

We’ve heard this quote so many times that the words start to sound like a yearbook motto. But Brand New Day makes Peter live inside this comic proverb.

Peter started out as a kid with big dreams, got a taste of what those dreams felt like while wearing the blue-and-red suit, and then had them come crashing down as he was snapped awake to the reality of life.

The suit isn’t just what gives Peter his powers; it’s a reminder that his life no longer belongs entirely to him.

He can choose not to swing tonight, but someone might get hurt. He can choose to pursue a normal relationship, but the people he loves become targets. He can choose to walk away, but he knows he won’t get a good night’s sleep.

Peter Parker is tied to that Spider-Man suit the same way we’re tied to our responsibilities in life.

We can’t choose to turn off our alarm just because we need a break. We can’t rot in bed just because we’re tired of dealing with problems at work.

We can’t run away from growing up.

Responsibility, after all, is choosing the thing you don’t want to choose because you know it’s the right thing. And accepting that those choices come with real consequences – consequences that we can’t simply undo with a little Disney magic and a heartfelt love letter.

The kid with big dreams

I was sixteen when I first watched Spider-Man: Homecoming.

At that age, I still thought of adulthood as a ticket to freedom. It was a chance to finally live in the grown-up fantasy land I had imagined for myself. There was my dream school to get into, the perfect career to map out, and the right person to fall in love with.

I didn’t realize then the number of versions of myself I’d be saying goodbye to just to get there.

It’s why I think Peter Parker felt so familiar.

Before the red-and-blue suit and giant bug eyes, Peter Parker was just like us then – a normal fifteen-year-old kid who was tired of being treated like a kid.

He wanted to be more than someone who pulled all-nighters with flash cards for a chemistry test. Or who made puppy-dog eyes whenever his crush walked down the hall.

His flash cards, textbooks, and Post-its felt familiar because growing up often looks like that: a wall full of tiny goals, each one promising that if you just keep moving, you’ll eventually arrive at the life you’ve imagined.

Putting on the suit

But at some point, the Post-its come down – and we start to experience the moment when the life we imagined starts getting replaced by the life we’re actually living.

Peter just got there faster than most of us.

Life may not hit most of us as hard as it did Peter, but the difference is palpable. The boy we see in Brand New Day is miles away from the kid we met in Homecoming.

But it isn’t because he stopped being good; it’s just because life happened.

He’s still the same smart, curious, and selfless kid. But at twenty-two? Peter looks weathered. Sharper, even.

Like someone who has finally seen the world for what it is, and chooses kindness even when it hasn’t been so kind to him.

A Brand New Day for the Sad Spider-Man

When I listened to ‘Purple’ again, I don’t think the lyric – “I had big dreams till I tied myself to you” – literally means Peter regretting the radioactive spider that bit him.

Peter doesn’t hate being Spider-Man – but he’ll always understand that choosing to be Spider-Man means risking having his greatest loss in life, for the sake of the greater good.

Because the hardest sacrifices aren’t always the ones we resent making. Sometimes, they’re the ones we’re actually willing to make all over again.

Peter knows the cost, and yet he keeps on putting the suit anyway.

Like Peter, we all start with a perfectly laid-out plan for how we want our life to go after graduating high school. A bucket list to fulfill for the person we think we should become.

Then life happens – some dreams disappear, and some simply stop making sense along the way. But maybe that’s no reason to resent the choices that led to where we are now.

Instead of mourning the person we thought we’d be forever, perhaps it’s better to learn to live with the person we become. And trust that there’s a reason life changed our trajectory.

Spider-Man: Brand New Day’s Peter Parker certainly did.

It’s about time we fulfill our part too.

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P.S. I firmly believe that Peter Parker would’ve absolutely had the time of his life streaming “you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love…

…and then cry on the laundry room floor to “Cigarette Smoke” at 2 a.m.